Researchers: Why are Gay Male Suicides Increasing?

Some gay people believe that being gay is a bad thing that limits them in a way that makes being successful (or what heteronormative society defines as successful), or being loved / validated / accepted, impossible.

Instead of looking for self empowerment they look for affirmation of being inferior and not worthy and their affirmations push them further in a state of depression and hopelessness.

And no matter how much better gay representation has become in the entertainment media industry and how much more accepting society has become of gay people some gay people still see themselves as not part of a good thing but something that can only end in tears and misery.

I say it's "Cis-Shaming" by the Transtapo!

Canada has a lot of hidden homophobia.

Trump

It predates Trump

Why are Gay Male Suicides Increasing?

Well... it seems to correlate to the legalization of same-sex marriage.

Maybe achieving equality revealed that the fight for equality is not the source of their depression, R6

Once it arrived, they'd still be left with all the depression and emptiness.

Wherever you go, there you are.

I think it might all be superficial, the increase in unattainably high standards of beauty amongst young millennials on Instagram and the pressure to be young and beautiful in both the hetero and gay worlds but so much more emphasised in the gay world.

OMFG. Is this a real topic. There are a million reasons why these young/youngish turds are killing themselves still. No social skills except looking down at their phone. Not knowing what to do with people in real life except look down at their phone. Living at home till they are in their 40s. Not knowing how to drive. Not knowing how to be independent. When their stupid, coddling parents go tits up thankfully most of these turds will probably off themselves as well. That is no loss whatsoever.

Just lose some 200 pounds and stop being too picky and bitchy! Who would want to be around a negative orca? No one.

r10 your reasoning could apply to any young person, gay or straight. We're talking exclusively gay men and not just young ones.

Lack of true, longterm meaningful relationships and connections

Oh, as if. The old fucks survived the aids, they will hold on. It is only the youngish ones who'd be killing themselves because they have no prospects for success or independence.

You can read all about gay teens killing themselves when they are being bullied in school.

Before social media people preferred to stay in the closet and keep their heads down and pray they survive high school. With social media gay teens look for like minded and open minded peers, but also attract mean Heathers and bullies.

Before marriage equality, many of us were confirmed bachelors. Now we’re old maids or spinsters.

Student Loans!

Gays start to realize that their only true companions in life, pets, will eat them one day!

i'd start with examining the increase use of anti-depressants by gay men in the last decade or more.

r14 please add to the demographic being discussed.

Hasn't the suicide date always been high?

In ancient days, gay men in England became colonial officers. Gave them a sense of purpose.

I'm not sure what they actually did, though.

'Don't those type of men shoot themselves'

R20 fuck you lol. Not everyone buys the propaganda that the young turds have it so bad. All your habits are destructive and make you stupid. People need to slap the stupid out of your useless generation with no buying power.

Do you not see the irony in telling someone to fuck off then adding lol? You're assuming I'm young and destructive and stupid. You're also generalising that every young person is too. I could also assume that you're old and bitter and twisted and that every older person is too. See the dangers in making generalisations?

The younger people have no imagination. I don't know why exactly, but it seems like they have no ability to dream of better things.

Stop making your sexuality your identity.

They're not allowed to have an imagination because of the political correctness thrust upon them from the previous, self important generation (late 30's - 40's). Don't be so quick to judge today's youth, it's not their fault, they are a product of their upbringing. They've been spoilt and indulged by parents too busy with their careers and life to actually spend quality time with them. They're overconfident because their parents have told them they're wonderful yet they're also insecure because their parents have given them no positive reinforcement to support their suggestions of superiority. Social media has them constantly comparing themselves to impossible ideals of beauty, again reinforcing that they're not good enough. If they do happen to be beautiful, they become narcissistic monsters. Rising costs of living, keeping up with the Jones's, little job prospects has them hopeless about their future.

R27 many others have said that already. Try saying something original. We all know they have no prospects.

[quote] The younger people have no imagination. I don't know why exactly, but it seems like they have no ability to dream of better things.

[quote] They're not allowed to have an imagination because of the political correctness thrust upon them from the previous, self important generation (late 30's - 40's).

Each generation has a small group of creative, out of the box thinking, pioneers. The rest are just dumb sheep chasing the latest trend or begging their chosen authority figures for guidance. It's always been like this since the dawn of time.

r27 fuck you're a bitter cunt, I suggest it's you who has no prospects.

You say the "straight and cis population", OP. Do you not realize that that 99% of the gay male population are what you call "cis"?? I hate that fucking term, btw.

This thread died fast, because no one wants to hear about the revolting younger generation. Nothing interesting about them all. Total panty waste.

Maybe it's less the pressure of beauty and hotness and boils down to social media bullshit of "my life is great" so in comparison they think they are losers and have a shitty life. Its been shown that the more time a person spends on social media the less happy and content they are. So the argument is that gay people already have more rumination than straights, so perhaps the social media use combines with rumination and voila some off themselves.

I dunno. The article seems like pop lite science anyway.

Gay men are the lowest on the totem pole of oppression. It's all about trans people now. LGBT organizations don't give a fuck about gay men, especially white gay men. No wonder why there's been an uptick in suicides. Fucking hell, even lesbians get more media coverage. When was the last time you saw an article about a gay man being the victim of a gay bashing? The incident of the lesbians was EVERYWHERE. When gay men suffer... *crickets*.

R34. Yes but what I want to know is what committee in the gay rights organisation decided gay and bi people needed to be lumped together with Intersex and trans? It's their fault that the circus of LGBTQIA exists.

That's all so wrong, R35. In every way, your statement is factually incorrect and entirely misdirected.

Your 'committee' rhetorical device is weak, empty and ineffective. For decades, the debate has been going on in gay organizations about inclusivity and respect and the ways our interests both intersect and diverge and sometimes conflict. The greater inclusivity that you seem to reject has come to the fore not because of weakness in that view, but because of its strength. A strength that has been recognized and accepted, again and again, in groups that have grappled with these ideas, again and again. And amongst thoughtful people, the debate will always continue.

If we stick together and take up one another's cause, we form a bigger block and consolidate more power. If a few malcontents just can't stand that and don't want to play, they are on their own. But by their own choice.

Millennials and Gen Z aren’t the only gay men committing suicide

Could it be that gay men are much more than just gay?

We experience the same economic and emotional issues as the straights who are increasingly committing suicide. On top of that is the layer of having to deal with being gay in a society who still thinks that makes us different

Suicide rates are increasing in general, not just among gay men.

True

"Why are Gay Male Suicides Increasing?"

Because they're finally realizing (a) the pron stars they've been obsessing over for the last 10 years aren't really their boyfriends and (b) said pron stars really don't give a shit about them.

The lack of connections and relationships is a huge reason. People with strong family and organizational bonds are Much less likely to commit or attempt suicide. Married people and those with children are much less likely to commit suicide, as are people with deep religious beliefs and activities. The absence of these core relationships makes one less likely to have support systems to cope with life trials and tribulations.

R42 that is not true. You can never predict when most will commit suicide. I had a neighbor with a successful tiling business, married with two teenage sons. He quits his business, the next day he shoots himself in the chin. Having loving families does not change anything if they decide they wanna die.

I think there was an illusion that increased social acceptance and legal rights would fulfill people. But the reality is it doesn’t. There are lots of groups of people in history who lived relatively happy and full lives despite being oppressed or despised. People need deep, transcendent meaning, values, and relationships to be emotionally and spiritually happy. Anomie is not fulfilling for most humans.

R43, your exception to the rule doesn’t vitiate the general rule verified by mounds of research and statistics

R45 BS. Who gives a fuck for stats and studies. Real life trumps that BS.

I would guess the glorification of promiscuity and open relationships by the "community".

Neither are good for your mental health.

Plus PREP too. Fucking a hundred men a week bareback cannot be good for their souls or their holes.

R36 No, inclusuvity in this case has resulted in Trans bullying gays, and an attempt at erasure. If opressed groups are better as one homogenous lump then how come races don't do the same thing? Wouldnt they fight prejudice better if they had an alphabet soup? You see I understand you are coming from a well meant perspective, i really do, but the reality is it dilutes us all, rather than making each group stronger. I have no idea about Trans experiences, or asexuals, I'm gay. I feel this is all going to implode at some point.

Yep, the reality is not hedonism is not fulfilling for most people. Living by impulses or the seeking of unbridled pleasure is a very shallow and meaningless life.

and just to elaborate on my post above

Promiscuity = fleeting, meaningless connections. View people and yourself as merely a dick (or ass).

Open Relationships = usually one person who can't handle a relationship (sociopath perhaps) and the second who is so desperate for a connection that they'll allow for an open relationship, even when they don't want one i.e. doormat. The doormat in these relationships are essentially being abused and usually end up turning into a sociopath themselves. I sadly dated a lovely guy who had been the doormat in a relationship, following the break-up he became a total whore. It wasn't going to work between us because of this. It really was a shame, if I had met him before he had that toxic relationship I think we would have got married.

R36. Are you a woman by any chance?

R52, No.

Internalized homophobia, self loathing and being easily triggered is a lethal combination.

R36 = transitioning as he types.

R54 but why would "Internalized homophobia, self loathing" be increasing?

The queens here who think we've achieved equality are hilarious.

Yep, the reality is hedonism is not fulfilling for most people. Also, the feeling of rejection or being an outcast is still just as prevalent among gay men as it was decades ago

R58 that's why if you're sensible you say "fuck the community / scene" and have nothing to do with it. It's also why the gays that don't do the scene are also the most "normal" / well rounded types

R59 very true. But how do you meet potential partners?

I guess everyone handles the stresses differently. I feel the ostracism all the time but people tell me I'm paranoid.

I've developed as a person who doesn't much value the opinions of most people. I find them disappointments as human beings: limited, bigoted, cowardly, self-centered, hateful...

This is my time on Earth and I'm going to find some happiness. But less and less am I finding that involves other people.

Low self esteem mixed with loneliness. When the trick leaves, the hunt continues the next day and it can get very tiresome and exhausting searching for love. All the swiping on the apps is not healthy.

r60 Indeed... the eternal problem. There's Tinder etc but chances are the person you're talking to is always a pass-around bottom on Grindr. It's hard.

Holy fuck, suicides in general are on the rise! It’s our consumerist culture driven by a fear mongering media that’s mostly to blame.

R56, it isn't increasing but being hyper sensitive is. In the 20th century, gay men laughed off being called a fag*or by some random redneck in the street. In 2019, baby gays have meltdowns over it.

R65 the whole "queer" thing probably doesn't help. How will people accept who they are if they can't even call themselves gay.

People say "queer" is empowering, blah blah blah... It isn't, it's just some sort of strange half-way closet.

My tinhat theory is that most people having kids in the 80s and 90s were Republican, and that means religion, bigotry and the almighty dollar. They dumped this attitude on their kids and the kids invented the hateful phrase, "That's so GAY!".

They rebelled (as young people do) but are torn between capitalism (the bling they see in the media) and a sort nouveau-hippie, maniacally politically correct social justice warrior mindset (though they still harbor that nagging homophobia).

They still can't say the word 'gay' (apparently queer is a better word). And they often think if they have same-sex atrraction they must be born in the wrong body.

And 23% of black women id as bisexual. 2x as much bi women as gay men, bi men and lesbians. And it is increasing. It tells you that bisexuality in women is clearly a choice.

WTF? Bi = closet gay.

[quote] [R58] that's why if you're sensible you say "fuck the community / scene" and have nothing to do with it. It's also why the gays that don't do the scene are also the most "normal" / well rounded types

You know what that creates? Incels. Sad, pathetic, creepy, angry loners who blame ("radical feminist", "overly PC", Queer") society for their own problems and shortcomings. Nothing well rounded or "normal" about that.

A so called normal or well rounded person creates his or her own community based on like minded beliefs, interests, philosophies, etc. They don't operate on, and obsess about, exclusion. They look for more people to expand and be happy and not looking for more people to go to war with a minority group like the LGBT Community.

What is that Salway doing at the,start? Checking his Grindr status?

[quote]The younger people have no imagination. I don't know why exactly, but it seems like they have no ability to dream of better things

The internet and groupthink tells them how to think. And it is all stupid and negative.

[quote]And we’re now learning that sexual minorities have structural risks

"Sexual minorities"? I thought he was talking about "gay."

R70 Sure Jan, because the community is really "beliefs, interests, philosophies" and not just a bunch of promiscuous drug users (This is the London gay community).

However in a broader context you are right when you say "A so called normal or well rounded person creates his or her own community based on like minded beliefs, interests, philosophies, etc. " That's the "normal" gays I'm referring to, they have friends based on mutual interests etc they're not friends with other people solely because they're both gay

I found this funny "hey don't operate on, and obsess about, exclusion." since the gay community is all about exclusion, all the tribes and sub-divisions.

R10 ignores the fact that plenty of elderly and middle-aged people commit suicide, so he can bash young people

It may be also because suicide rates are going up in general for single people in their 40s and 50s

Small town Canada is homopobic and isolating and the cities aren't that great either.

Suicide rates are on the rise across the board.

Wow, so many people here can't understand the difference between fact and opinion. They'll rant against millennials despite evidence that suicide is rising for older people. They blame trans people with zero evidence. They just recite right-wing talking points, facts be damned.

Miss Talking Points 2019 est arrivée.

[quote] I found this funny "hey don't operate on, and obsess about, exclusion." since the gay community is all about exclusion, all the tribes and sub-divisions.

That's why I consider myself part of the LGBT Community. Not the so called "Drop all the other letters" Gay Community some trolls try to establish.

[quote] [R70] Sure Jan, because the community is really "beliefs, interests, philosophies" and not just a bunch of promiscuous drug users (This is the London gay community).

That's as much of a stereotype as black people being ghetto thugs and members of gangs. If that makes you sleep at night. Sleep well.

"They're not allowed to have an imagination because of the political correctness thrust upon them from the previous, self important generation (late 30's - 40's)."

I'd say a bigger problem is the Republican hatemongers who rant against "political correctness" and blame everything they don't like on minorities.

We are raised to get defeated by outside circumstances we are told are too important and too valuable to ignore. Like getting accepted by your peers being more important than accepting yourself. Money being more important that your dignity, your moral compass, and your own sense of self worth.

Some of us deliberately walk someone else's path and then get so frustrated and exhausted that they simply want to stop this futile endeavour we call life. Even after gay people come out and claim ownership of their own lives some still can't let go of all the anger, bitterness, and frustration they felt in the past.

Sorry, Money being more important than your dignity, ...

It seems like if a gay celeb is closeted they'll attack him for being a closet case......but then when he comes out, attack him by saying "Why do we need to hear this?" or bash him for coming out too late, or coming out the wrong way......

Bump

There's an ugly snowflake on this thread.

Well-states, r83.

Well-stated

It’s never been easier for the gay community as a whole, every identity and sexuality, but in recent years gay men have been put on the back burner more and more. Not many even really care about us or our rights anymore. Gay women have more favor from the public, trans people have all the political favor. We’re kind of just left to rot on our own, and thus things like mental health are allowed to spiral because people at best don’t care and at worst don’t like us.

R90, what a self-absorbed post. You have to be the center of attention ?

R91 No, shit-lips. Forgive me for not wanting gay men’s rights to regress to sodomy law times. We don’t need to be the center of attention, we just don’t want to be neglected amongst the bullshit. Some of us remember a time when killing a man just because you thought he was gay was legal, and we want to make sure we don’t go back to that. As my grandpa used to say, never again.

[quote]Why are Gay Male Suicides Increasing?

Not enough tops.

Instagram. DUH.

honey, im 74, kill urself while ur still healthy and pretty ! old sucks !!!!

Instagram gets blamed on everything

[quote] 2x as much bi women as gay men, bi men and lesbians. And it is increasing. It tells you that bisexuality in women is clearly a choice.

R68 historically and to the present day women have had more pressing problems than their sexuality. There's that whole thing of, surviving in a world that has decided you are a lower/servant-caste. Up until the last 100 years in the West, women had to fight to keep food in their belly and a position under a roof and behind doors that lock against rapine, and that is still the case in many countries. Sexuality is a minor concern or an afterthought for most women, who also must grapple with a biological clock and a fight to get ahead (yes, even in an 'affirmative' world). It's harder for men to live openly as gay/bi, but until very recently it's been harder for women to just live as sexual or autonomous beings.

I'd argue that all sexuality is adaptational but for women moreso than men, because women typically socialise exclusively with other women and have had more intense pressure to operate carefully under stricture. No, no-one ever cared if Mistress was fucking the serving wench but that was because both of them were considered chattel of Master (who did what he wanted with the footman anyway) and thus irrelevant.

Things have radically changed of late, of course, which might account for the sudden confused proliferation of LBQA????? girls flailing about and all the hysteria over FtM. It's a novel thing for women to have any serious attention paid to anything they do at all, and a new option for women to consider becoming of the caste that have so long oppressed them (and how sad that such a choice feels viable or wise or desirous).

[quote]Instagram gets blamed on everything

FOR everything, not "on."

Fighting vainly the old ennui?