Hi, it's me, Joel.

what brings you to datalounge on a night such as this?

Did you ever walk around naked in your bedroom to get your neighbor's attention or did he find you on Chaturbate?

Yes, we do have questions: what do you know about Bill Taylor's sudden disappearance, Joel?

Who's Bill Taylor?

Who was the first to suck your cock Joel and was money paid to you?

What happened? Cat got your tongue Joel? why no answers for all your fans?

Hi Joel. Do you know Erna?

Joel, are you insane?

What are your measurements?

Say what you will, swaming drones of the DL, Joel is entirely too in charge of his own priorities to respond to your taunts and accusations

Joel, have you seen Mitzi lately? I hear she wasn't too fond of you.

What do you really think of Mitzi? Be honest.

Can somebody explain this Joel meme to me ?

R1 - My neighbour and I just got out of his hot tub where we discussed Foucault's "Ceci n'est pas une pipe."

R2 - No.

R3 - Already answered

R5 - I'll never tell, and no.

R7 - No.

R8 - No.

R9 - I'm 5'8, 28 inch waist, 65 kilos.

R10 - Thank you!

R11 - I saw her tonight.

R12 - I love her! Everyone does!

R13 - My name is Joel, I'm a 19 year old Canadian, not a meme.

r13: No. Sorry.

Do you play hockey? If so how many hockey players have you had sex with?

Any other measurements you can share?

I don't play hockey, R16, only rugby and water polo.

Joel, are you posting from Starbux or your parents' basement?

Parents' basement, R19.

What is your neighbor's name? The one who gives you all the presents.

What do you do for constipation, Joel? I have been plugged up for the last 3 days.

Was your parents basement improved on an HGTV show?

What's your favorite opera, Joel? I hear you're way into it.

Joel, do your parents know the full extent of the relationship with your neighbour, and what do they think about it?

And how did the cruise go?

Joel, Backgammon or Chess? College plans? Favorite musical group or singer? Current favorite author or genre?

What do you think about Dylan Geick?

Joel, another question: are your neighbors Gargoyles or guilty of BBQ-ing at night?

Joel, what is the name of you neighbor--since we know yours and Mitzi's.

Where the hell did Joel go?!

R21 - I'm not going to say his name here because he's a university professor, so his privacy is important.

R22 - Sorry, I can't help you.

R23 - No.

R24 - I love Rigoletto, Pagliacci, and anything by Bizet.

R25 - My parents know about our neighbour and appreciate me having a mentor, especially since he's a positive gay role model. The cruise was great! So was the trip to NYC.

R26 - Backgammon! I just finished 2nd year university, majoring in Classics. I'm also taking some philosophy courses and would like to go into law school one day.

R27 - No opinion really.

R28 - Um, no??

Do your parents know that you're gay? How old were you when you came out to them, or in general? Are you out to your rugby and/or water polo team?

Aha! Our Joel's a fraud!

Joel knows nothing about 'Gargoyles' or BBQ-ing at night.

So Joel--officially gay? have an appropriate boyfriend or still learning what you like by playing the field?

What did you think of Aaron Schock’s nude video?

R32 - My parents said that they knew I was gay since I was a kid, probably about eight or nine. Both my teams know I'm gay.

R33 - Why would I know about neighbours who are gargoyles or who bbq at night? You know about my one neighbour, the others are boring middle aged couples.

R34 - I know what I like already.

R35 - Not much. From what I know, he's a gross American politician.

Care to expand on point # 3 ?

R37 - I know I like men so there's no need for me to play the field.

I, for one, am so excited to meet you, Joel. Our hope for a civilized future. Sorry about global warming. Good thing you’re up in Canada. You’ll be OK.

Do you know the PBMT?

Thank you, R39. Sadly, Canada is warming at a faster rate than the rest of the world. Our arctic is literally melting and polar bears are dying off.

R40 - No.

Joel do you feel like a celebrity given all this attention? Or simply an object of slightly prurient interest.

A bit of both, R42.

I'm starting to think that Joel and the neighbor are real....

"Joel" is totally busted big time!

Helllloooo, JOel! Are U There?

It's not impossible that there are a few people in the world who are interested in cultivating themselves, in learning about new kinds of artistic and athletic pursuits, and who benefit from mentoring by older people who want to pass on their knowledge to a younger generation, and have no ulterior or prurient motives of any kind. As hard as that might be to imagine in today's world.

How is Joel busted, R45?

Joel, how did you learn about your being a subject of interest on DataLounge?

Joel, may I sniff your balls?

What's your uncle's name?

I’d have thought a bright young man would know his grammar.

My best friend in elementary school was named Joel. Are you my best friend from elementary school?

Is that Tammery a strumpet or what?

Not OP, but I'd say chess, Princeton, Bob Seger and home business how-to, R26

R49 - No!

R50 - I have many uncles.

R52 - Probably not.

R53 - Who?

I have to go now. It's time for me to get up, have a shower and get ready for my rugby practice.

Joel, do you know any French? How good is it? Do young gays on Canada like Justin Trudeau? Do they think he's hot or just an old troll by now?

Dear Joel:

Just a bit of advice. When you set out to create a fake persona, you have to make your responses somewhat funny, in order to keep up reader interest. Merely answering yes or no just shows us what you really are: a terribly unfunny troll. Your creator went to a lot of trouble to bring you to life, yet here you are, about as interesting as a used dish rag.

[quote]water polo

Yeah. You're not Canadian.

Does Erna have a job?

What does she do for a living?

Have you ever had another classmate pull your pants and underpants off you and try to fuck you? Did you like it?

Have you fucked Traylor yet?

Joel, who would you rather, Jussie Smollett or Shemar Moore?

Joel, why do you like fish when we hope you don't?

Joel, have you had sex with your neighbor? Do you want to?

Joel, do you and your neighbor read and respond to DataLounge together?

Joel, do you have a cunty sister named Julie?

R58 - Why do you say that? Because I play water polo??

R60 - No! I'm gen z, as in , gen ZED!

R61 - I've never met a guy named Traylor, so no.

R62 - Shemar.

R64 - I've never had sex with him but I'd like for him to be my first because I know he'd be gentle.

R65 - Yes! He's the one who introduced me to Datalounge!

R66 - No. I don't have any sisters and Julie sounds like a bitch, so I'm glad we're not related.

[quote] r64 - I've never had sex with him but I'd like for him to be my first because I know he'd be gentle.

Well, now we know that Joel and the neighbor are one and the same poster.

What are you talking about, R68?

What college are you attending or planning to attend?

I'm in university, R70.

I think Joel is British. I always thought of Joel being All American like Tom Cruise in Risky Business and his neighbor being like Nathan Lane.

I'm not British, R72.

Joel and Mitzi's human are Canadian. This imposter Joel is boring.

Sorry I'm boring you, R74, but I've had a long day! I was up at 5:30, had to be at rugby by 8, then had a class this afternoon. After I got home from that, I had supper and then went for a run with my rugby team.

[quote] What are you talking about, [R68]?

Any real teen boy/young man would be repulsed at the thought of sex with the real-life version of Mitzi's ancient and insufferably queeny owner.

Is this you Joel?

Normally you'd be right, R76, but my neighbour has been so kind and caring to me and I've developed feelings for him. He understands me like no one else ever has.

R77 - Who??

^Vomit

R66 - Joel and I are actually fraternal twins (Julie and Joel). He wishes we were identical; hence his quick denial of our being related.

Just a moment! I thought Mitzi was the neighbor’s mother’s dog?

Joel—what is the gentleman’s name? Do you still address him as “Mister ___?”

You’re right @R76. When I was a twink I wouldn’t let an old theater queen keep eye contact with me, much less touch me. Eww!

Joel, you are a snoozefest bore

Joel, do you prefer this cock in your mouth or ass? Can you handle it?

Joel, please post a pic of your dick. Thank you!

Joel? Joel? Hello? Is anyone there?

He's out fucking his many admirers. Neighbors. Uncles. The lot of them.

Meeting Joel was terribly disappointing. The old adage is true: never meet your heroes, you’ll only be let down :(