Queen Victoria was kind of cute when she was young.

She's played by a gorgeous actress in the PBS series Victoria.

I know that she & Albert are supposed to be this amazing love story but I can't stand him. If it were a different time I'd have divorced his ass.

Here's a slightly less flattering portrait, but even with her awful profile she was still... sort of cute.

pedo thread

There's an upcoming exhibit of her dresses at Buckingham Palace to commemorate the 200th anniversary of her birth. Take a look at how tiny she was at one point. The girth came later.

One of the most fascinating facts about her is that she was subject to eight assassination attempts.

Mr. Brown took care of her needs later on.

She was youthful and fresh-faced in her first decade as queen, and she had amazing large eyes, but she was never genuinely pretty.

I think the most accurate depiction of her ever on screen both in terms of what she was like physically and as a person was when Sinead Matthews in MR. TURNER a few years ago. Matthews is young but came across as quite plain (they did not pretty her up), and she and the Prince Albert character (Tom Wlaschina from GAME OF THRONES) were snobbish, sanctimonious prudes when they viewed Turner's paintings, and spoke to each other in German thinking no one else would understand their bitchy comments about Tuner's paintings.

Victoria was a really piece of work.

She’s my favorite queen

She was tiny, ugly and barely spoke English. How she's been spun into some kind of British Heroine I'll never understand.

She hated all her children

Don't watch that PBS special on her. Truth is not fun. Horrid mother. She was jealous of them and extremely controlling.

Barely spoke English? It had been generations since a British monarch "barely spoke English".

She and her husband, Albert, were crazy-in-love before they were married, and after, their sexual and romantic obsession with one another left everyone around them on the outside. Victoria resented her children for distracting her lover (her husband), and was beyond destroyed when he die, saying "There is no one left to call me Victoria".

She was lovely when glowing with love at her wedding and during the first few years of their marriage. Too many pregnancies ruined her figure, perpetual widowhood, and resenting the rest of the world for going on living when Albert died, ruined her face.

R12 Albert never called her Victoria.

Were victoria and albert cousins?

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I've never figured out how she carried the gene for hemophilia? Apparently, she was the first royal to have that gene. Just who truly were her parents?

And yes - Victoria and Albert were first cousins.

R13: It is a famous quote. Perhaps you'd prefer the German:

‘There is no one to call me Victoria now,’ she had wept, though the version she used with her German-speaking relatives was more wrenching: ‘I have no one now in the world to call me “du” [the friendly, intimate form of you].’

[quote] She hated all her children

That's not true. She loved her eldest daughter Vicky, the Empress of Germany, and she especially loved especially her youngest child Beatrice. She was also very fond of her favorite son, Arthur, Duke of Connaught.

She did not always have the best relationships with her other children, the Prince of Wales (Bertie) especially. And it is true she disliked all babies during her entire life.

Talk about a controlling mother...

R17 No-one close to her called her Victoria. Victoria was her coronation name.

She had special contempt for her oldest son, Edward VII (he of the infamous "sex chair") whom she blamed for Albert's death from typhoid. Edward had some sort of a dalliance in Ireland with an actress or someone inappropriate. Albert dispatched himself to Ireland and died shortly upon his return to London.

[quote]she and the Prince Albert character (Tom Wlaschina from GAME OF THRONES) were snobbish, sanctimonious prudes

A few months ago, I watched a documentary/recreation of Victoria and Albert's courtship and wedding on PBS. During wedding planning, stick-up-the-ass Albert insisted that the bridal attendants be from families with impeccable morals and reputations. It had to be politely explained to him that would be impossible to find such families among British royalty and aristocracy.

I don't think he called her Victoria in conversation, I think she was making a point when he died that there was no one left who could speak to her informally. Also my point.

When this photo was taken, Victoria was 35 and extremely happy in her marriage, but you'd never know it from her dour, bleary expression.

^Not Edward VII at the time, but Albert the Prince of Wales

I heard Victoria's pussy stank. But what didn't stink in that era!

R16 A significant percentage of haemophilia is a spontaneous mutation, and is linked to advanced paternal age - Victoria's father was in his 50s. The likelihood of her mother having had an affair with a haemophiliac is extremely low since male haemophiliacs rarely survived to adulthood in that era.

One of the most unusual things about Queen Victoria is how much she travelled across Europe (mainly to visit family), most previous monarchs rarely left the UK.

OP, you should watch the series Victoria. They've done a good job at portraying her as young and vivacious, rather than the obese, bipolar old cow we all know she really was.

Queen Victoria was responsible for the Russian Revolution indirectly. Her daughter, Alix, carried hemophilia, which only manifests in boys. Alix had Alexi, who had it, she turned to Rasputin, and the rest is history.

Jenna Coleman has portrayed Victoria for the past few seasons on the PBS series, VICTORIA. She's much better looking than the actress in the R6 post.

Was the film with Judi Dench and Ali Fazal, VICTORIA & ABDUL, accurate? Of course, the real Abdul Karim wasn't as handsome as Ali Fazal.

Victoria isn't really looked upon fondly by today's Brits. She's portrayed as some kindly matriarch in nonsense like the series Victoria on ITV. But most people these days know she could barely speak English and had very little care for her role as sovereign. She might have been 'in charge' during a great era for Britain but she had absolutely nothing to do with it and probably did more for the anti-monarchy movement than any monarch before or since.

Granted the only things I know about Victoria is from watching the PBS series. but I wish she had married Lord Melbourne instead of the priggish Albert.

Yeah, yeah it's history but I still preferred Lord M.

She was never "cute." She was always short, dumpy and plain. She was lucky to get Albert, who was much more attractive than she was.

R29 Alix is her granddaughter.

R29 Alexandra Feodorovna, Empress of Russia (Alix) was Queen Victoria's Granddaughter, The Daughter Princess Alice The Queen's 2nd Daughter.

Given that Alix was born 11 years after Prince Albert died it would have caused quite a scandal if she had been her daughter.

R29 The following is a picture of a young Alix with her mother, Princess Alice.

That was fo' all hell broke loose and dey got the "-theria!"

Yes, thank you r34. I knew better!

No OP.

How long did exposure take for those portraits.? Several minutes? Maybe she has resting bitch face.

Plainer than plain op. Albert was to be commended for fucking her! She looked nothing like Jenna Coleman - who is ridiculously pretty! - and all the painted portraits you see of Victoria are highly flattering! Those artists knew how to flatter and enhance their subject to earn their keep!

Plain, lumpen Germanic woman - and you can see how that plays out today! Any good looks that occur in that family are thanks to genes from outside their lineage.

She was rather plain.

Charming photo, R36, but, Alice looked so sad, her appearance suggests she was in mourning. She had pretty children (the little girls in bustles, very sweet) & a cute bear for a husband.

Victoria & Albert's wedding portrait, I wonder if Albert's trousers were actually that tight or was it artistic license? He looks nude from the waist down, at least, Victoria knew what she was getting.

She looks good here.

Is Jenna Coleman what DL would calm “white adjacent”?

Is Jenna Coleman what DL would call “white adjacent”?

[quote] Plainer than plain op. Albert was to be commended for fucking her!

They were kind of evenly matched, looks wise.

Think younger Albert was kinda hotter OP - and that vile, greasy m Victorian hair isn’t doing him any favours! If he had a buzz cut he’d look like many middle aged urban gay daddy types today I reckon...

The pic at R47 is photoshopped!!!

Her best looking child was her eldest daughter, Vicky.

She was a fascinating woman. England hasn't had that many Queens, but some of them have been pretty amazing. Her friendship with Abdul Karim, and her quest to learn Urdu, are fascinating to me. When he and his wife were having trouble conceiving, she actually gave him advice on sex positions.

Queen Victoria in her wedding dress, 1840

R46 Jenna Coleman is about as White British as you can get.

Tiny bit of Irish ancestry, but so has almost everybody else from the North of Britain and the whole Ireland was part of the UK back then anyway.

We are not amused.

She was taught drawing at a young age and became a talented artist.

The following drawing is a self-portrait, 1835.

R55 she was quite delusion about her looks

Yes, did she have bad eyesight?

Here's a better picture of her self-portrait in 1835.

[quote] When this photo was taken, Victoria was 35 and extremely happy in her marriage, but you'd never know it from her dour, bleary expression.

People didn't smile in the earliest photographs (which is what yours is). For decades, the technology required a long exposure, and people could not hold smiles for the length of time the exposure required. So they relaxed their facial expressions so they would not look blurred.

[quote] Granted the only things I know about Victoria is from watching the PBS series. but I wish she had married Lord Melbourne instead of the priggish Albert.

In that era it was unthinkable for a British queen to marry anyone other than other European royalty. She simply could not have married anyone other than another European king or prince (and a Protestant one to boot). The last sovereign or heir to the throne up until that time to marry a commoner was James, Duke of York (later James II), whose first marriage was to Lady Anne Hyde.

Victoria herself had to lobby hard to make it possible for her daughter Louise to marry the Marquess of Lorne (later the Duke of Fife) because she realized it would be virtually impossible for all her younger royal daughters to marry only royalty (which had been the tradition for a hundred years, but which was becoming harder since there were fewer and fewer male royals in Europe). But she did expect her eldest son to marry royalty and for her eldest daughter to marry royalty too (and they both did).

Another self portrait, age 25

Victoria the queen of delusion.

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R62 quite good , she had talent.

Cunt. A real cunt.

German mother tongued Victoria was fluent in unaccented English by her teens and of course she spoke French and Italian. But do go on.

Even way back then they had that stereotypical British inbred look. Those puffy faces and huge bug eyes.

They were ethnically German, R66.

Lumpen is a great description. Her whole face is lumpy, every part of it.

Why were she and her he-lump so into each other? They’re both hideous.

I giggle at the REE-DICK-A-LUSS crownlet she ordered from her jeweler. It looks like a stage prop.

Lumpen doesn't mean what you think it does.

She was a tubby, grouchy sex fiend.

Is she the one was reputed to have had a contraption built so she could be buggered by a Shetland Pony?

I would have loved chasing her with a flyswatter and she waddled up and down the halls of the palace trying to escape my swats.

She looks like a young Bette Davis in her self portrait at r53

Later in life she looked well on the way to goiterdom.

Kinda looks like Hitchcock.

Victoria was never as obese as some of the women you see at Wal-Mart today.

Doubtful. She was very squat.

This looks kinda good - and paints a picture of the Queen as a very greedy frau...

She was 4'11" and her waist was said to measure 50 inches at its peak. Yep, that's circus-sized. She was said to eat so fast that guests knew to eat beforehand because they'd scarcely touched their food when she'd finished. The protocol is when the monarch finishes, everybody puts their forks down. Yeah, I'd say she'd worthy nowadays.

Would’ve loved to see her shoveling in the grub at a dinner party. Hope they show that on Victoria.

Queen Victoria showed an interest in her people. I think the current Queen does, too.

R73 and I would have loved tripping her as she ran from your swats.

I would have liked queen V much more than boring Elizabeth ll.

To the deluded soul upthread trying to claim Vicky actually liked one of her children.....history does say No

With her son the future King George V and DL fave the future Queen Mary.

According to a biography I read recently, Albert was the prude.

R86, George V was Victoria’s grandson. His father, Edward VII, was Victoria’s son.

Prince Albert must've been an amazing fuck. Victoria missed that dick for the rest of her life.

She was the product of her childhood.

She had an isolated childhood with no playmates. She felt insecure about her lack of education and blamed her mother for it. She ate a lot because of stress.

She ate a lot because she was greedy and food obsessed. Even from when she was a little girl - it was lifelong.

And she knew the protocol at Royal dinners and banquets. She was served first - and when she’d finished a course - everyone else had to lay down their forks as well. Some people barely had the food placed in front of them - and she’d be finished - so it’d be removed barely touched. So many of the people at big dinners with her must’ve beef ravenous! Or some would quickly snatch a mouthful of every course before it disappeared - and over a lot of courses - perhaps they had enough.

If that old biddy gave two hoots about anyone else at all - ya think she could have waited a little and not bolted everything down so quickly like it was her last meal? Selfish old cunt. Give a frau some power - and watch them be absolutely vile. The worst!

Here's the real Lord Melbourne, who was prime minister when Victoria inherited the throne, and who was her most trusted adviser and closest friend.

He was 58 and she was 18 when she came to the throne, and while he was a very attractive older man if the portraits are at all trustworthy, he was still forty years older than she was. Three times her age. Not to mention his personal life was considered scandalous: His wife, Lady Caroline Lamb, had run off with the poet Lord Byron and had a highly public and extremely scandalous affair, and while Melbourne took her back and stayed with her until she died, and he was later sued for (allegedly) having an affair with a married woman. So I suppose Queen Victoria might have succeeded in marrying a non-royal eventually if she'd put her mind to it, she was NOT going to marry a non-royal politician, adulterer, and cuckold, who was forty years her senior.

He’s hawt.

Verna Felton used to remind me of Queen Vic.

If they were realistic they would get Rachel Dratch to play her.

Her second husband?

[quote]Tony Rennell's book Last Days of Glory: The Death of Queen Victoria reveals that Victoria had entrusted detailed instructions about her burial to her doctor, Sir James Reid (Brown died in 1883: the Queen's wish was for him to attend to her). These included a list of the keepsakes and mementoes, photographs and trinkets to be placed in the coffin with her: along with Albert's dressing gown and a plaster cast of his hand,[bold] the Queen was buried with a lock of Brown's hair, his photograph, Brown's mother's wedding ring, given to her by Brown, along with several of his letters. The photograph, wrapped in white tissue paper, was placed in her left hand, with flowers arranged to hide it from view. She wore the ring on the third finger of her right hand.[/bold]

She was a queen and required sexual servicing.

According to the film Victoria & Abdul, Victoria's servant/friend Abdul Karim had syphilis. I'm sure that might explain why his wife couldn't become pregnant.

"As the Munshi had no children, his nephews and grandnephews inherited his wealth and properties. The Munshi's family continued to reside in Agra until Indian independence and the partition of India in August 1947, after which they emigrated to Karachi, Pakistan. The estate, including Karim Lodge, was confiscated by the Indian government and distributed among Hindu refugees from Pakistan. Half of Karim Lodge was subsequently divided into two individual residences, with the remaining half becoming a nursing home and doctor's office."

[quote] During wedding planning, stick-up-the-ass Albert insisted that the bridal attendants be from families with impeccable morals and reputations. It had to be politely explained to him that would be impossible to find such families among British royalty and aristocracy.

Sometimes I love this ridiculous country.

Her children and servants HATED John Brown.

They also disliked The Munshi, although less virulently so. Neither knew their "place", which was odd, as Victoria was so fastidious about the rules.

Queen Victoria's libido seemed to overrule protocol. It was pretty unusual for women of the age to actually enjoy sex, especially a virgin at her first encounter. But enjoy it she did even on her wedding night.

R101, nobody got to break the rules around Queen Victoria... except Victoria!

If she wanted to violate protocol by befriending her underlings then nobody was going to stop her, but that doesn't mean she let anyone else get away with anything.

I was shocked by how small she was when I saw her tomb in London.

She was buried with items from Prince Albert on her one side and items from Mr. Brown on her other side. I'm assuming at her request. I can't remember what it was, but the items from Mr Brown were quite personal.

Albert was only good-looking for a very brief period of time: During his courtship and very early married years to Victoria. This was probably because when they first met as teenagers, she thought he was rather podgy and plain, which jeopardized the match that he knew would make his future. He built up his body into her Prince Charming ideal, but as soon as the ring safely on his finger, he morphed into a lumpy middle-aged man.

Albert was EXTREMELY homosocial, if not actually homosexual: He only liked and respected men. His attraction to Victoria was two-fold. She strongly resembled his mother, whom he lost as a boy when she was banished for adultery, AND every time he knocked Victoria up, he was as good as king since he ran things while she was indisposed. Whatever or Whomever Albert liked to shag in his spare time, what really got him off was power.

Victoria liked men with hot bodies. She had a brief infatuation with the future Alexander II of Russia that mostly centered on his looks and masculine body.

R105, see R97.

Robert Webb's definite portrayal of Queen Victoria.

Everyone makes a big to-do out of her cousin marriage but it wasn’t a taboo in Britain back then, and was even encouraged amid the upper classes/gentry.

Since the Victorian times relations between cross-cousins in England have become increasingly verboten (except in very rural communities and also the immigrant Muslim population, for obvious reasons) but Victoria & Albert had little to do with this.

I’m still not really sure why first cousin marriage is a taboo now, when single incidents of it (I.e. not repeated down the ancestral line) do not lead to defective kids.

R109 Meant to say definitive

R111 - IS marrying cousins illegal in the UK nowadays? It’s not in Australia. Will have to do some research!

Ok r112 - looks like it’s still legal in most places than not. The map on the wiki page gives best at a glance idea. It’s a statewide thing in the US - and only illegal in about half of them.

So - not really that taboo at all!

Oooos! Forgot link to wiki page...

So she hated children, had resting bitch face, was a nightmare dinner party host, frequently stated her boundaries, and craved big cock. I declare Queen Victoria a posthumous honorary Datalounger.

Earlier it was said that info on Princess Louise was off limits even to members of the royal family. Who exactly would put this info out of reach? Is this a case of no one caring?

she was peasant looking, and like a real peasant she only loved eating and fucking.

I want to know how that Walking Hay Bale (with the little crownlet on top) took her daily baths.

Did a Lady-in-Waiting have to accompany her in the bath or did they have some poor scullery maid do the deed? Or did she bathe herself?

Did her bathroom have a shower? Or did they roll her out the forecourt a shoot a garden hose at her once a week?

It's been suggested royal cousins no longer marrying very often is a result of the effect Victoria carrying the haemophilia gene had on the Royal Houses of Europe. Entire families became no longer very desirable once they realised, and it became more acceptable to widen the gene pool by marrying outside of royal circles.

Back then they also didn't know about inbreeding and deformities, retardation etc. I believe it wasn't until the early 20th century that people became aware of that.

And of course modern people (in the West anyway) find the idea of cousins marrying to be absolutely disgusting.

Victoria and Albert.

Victoria and Albert on TV. Something is NOT right.

The portraits were much more "flattering" than the real people in the photos.

A photo of Albert.

A rare photo of Queen Victoria smiling.

Teeth!

Victoria was NEVER a great beauty. Poppy eyes, long nose, short and plump. Bug-edged Bea of York resembles her except she's taller.

Yikes r125! No wonder she opted for RBF.

R125 she looked like Mickey Rooney lol

"It's been suggested royal cousins no longer marrying very often is a result of the effect Victoria carrying the haemophilia gene had on the Royal Houses of Europe. "

That, and the fact that the decline in the real powers of royalty mean that there was nothing to be gained from political marriages with other royals. Arranged marriages with other royals used to be a political necessity, a way from averting wars, as the king of other nations presumably wouldn't make war on a nation ruled by their own grandchild or cousin. So marrying other royals was a necessity at first, then a tradition, then a danger. So starting in the 19th century, constitutional monarchs started marrying for love, if usually in their own class, and now the Crown Princess of Sweden is marrying her personal trailer and getting some new blood into the line.

They could at least stick to aristocratic marriages.

The familial links between the royal houses of Europe continues to this day. The Royal Families of the UK, the Netherlands, Denmark, Sweden and Norway are very close friends.

Tell me, are the royal houses of Europe who aren't related to Queen Victoria still intermarrying?

Of course there's no longer any political necessity to marry other royals, but most people marry someone from a background similar to their own. There's comfort in marrying someone with similar life experiences and world views.

R133 That seems to have stopped, only the King of Belgium isn't married to a commoner.

You know Queen V roly-polyed herself on Brown as often as he let her.