My experience is that the only truly monogamous gay people are:
-Ugly people who had never slept around even when they were single. One poster above said he had mind blowing sex w a stranger while in an open relationships and that he couldn’t forget the stranger. He said this as a reason he no longer believes in open relationships. Well, if you’re attractive and good at sex, you’re not gonna get hung up on a hot one night stand... -Religious boring self loathing people who think belonging to a church means they one of the good boys. These people would most likely be republicans supporting Trump if they weren’t gay. They’re the types who think cops wouldn’t shoot innocent black people if black people learned some manners! These guys usually become cheaters later on. Self righteous fags taking their daddy issues out on God always end up becoming huge sex freaks. Ex:any anti gay republican politician...
Also, gays who complain about not being able to find a relationship in urban cities are the most self sabotaging people out there. If you’re in NYC and can’t get a BF... well that says more about you than NYC.
Growing up gay I never thought I’d have a normal relationship, so I rejected relationships before they rejected me. With that said, it was almost impossible not to be in a relationship, and I ended up having four serious relationships that lasted 12-15 months before my mid 30s. They were all monogamous and they all ended over other issues (never lack of Sex, never cheating). While I was monogamous in those relationships, none of them lasted over a year and a half, and I suspected I would’ve started straying had they lasted years and years.
By my mid 30s, I meet my fifth relationship. Neither of us take it seriously at first but it grows and grows. We both have had only monogamous relationships but we both admit had those relationships lasted over 2 years, we would’ve strayed. So we officially become a couple and choose to be monogamous during the honeymoon period (a year according to both of us) and then open it up after.
A year and a half passes by and we open it up and agree that we don’t have to talk about it (as of now neither of us like the idea of threesomes). At the two year mark, I have a work trip and end up having a weekend romance with a stranger I meet while away. It was very intense and actually romantic, but I develop zero romantic feelings. My BF has stepped out too and it doesn’t bother me either since it’s so rare and low key.
While we are open, the idea of sleeping around is ridiculous and I think only people without careers think people in open relationships sleep around all the time. We are both too freaking busy with demanding jobs we love to be actively looking. We don’t do apps, or have any sceney gay friends so that keeps the drama out of our lives as well. With that said, I’m a hung top and my bf is stereotypically hot, so we still get hit on a lot.
As for our relationship, we never argue over sex or jealousy. We argue over lame every day stuff. We cuddle to sleep every night, make each other laugh all the time, and we are very affectionate. If those things weren’t true, then no amount of openness would be enough to stay. Both of our careers have really taken off in the past year, and finally having a great job I love consumes most of my free time. Same with my partner.
The idea that one person is supposed to satisfy my every desire and need sounds psychotic to me. I’m willing to guess these super pro monogamous fools are also extremely jealous of their significant others friendships. I have one friend who very religious partner gets upset even when my friend hangs out with females. My friend is a gay man btw.