Hello and thank you for being a DL contributor. We are changing the login scheme for contributors for simpler login and to better support using multiple devices. Please click here to update your account with a username and password.

Hello. Some features on this site require registration. Please click here to register for free.

Hello and thank you for registering. Please complete the process by verifying your email address. If you can't find the email you can resend it here.

Hello. Some features on this site require a subscription. Please click here to get full access and no ads for $1.99 or less per month.

Let's be fraus shopping at Costco

I'm the mad shopping cart rush over to the sample station. They're handing out samples of lobster bisque!

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 86April 15, 2019 5:37 AM

Excuse me. Where are the almonds?

by Anonymousreply 1March 28, 2019 10:08 PM

Rebecca! Do you want to go in with me on a package of 20,000 Q-Tips?

by Anonymousreply 2March 28, 2019 10:08 PM

I'm the matching Kirkland flannels she's buying for dad and son.

by Anonymousreply 3March 28, 2019 10:09 PM

I'm the ginormous bottle of Sangria she's buying.

by Anonymousreply 4March 28, 2019 10:11 PM

I'm the SUVs circling around the parking lot for the closest parking space.

by Anonymousreply 5March 28, 2019 10:12 PM

I’m the dumb whore you encounter in every isle.

by Anonymousreply 6March 28, 2019 10:13 PM

I'm the saved appetite for the sampling

by Anonymousreply 7March 28, 2019 10:16 PM

I’m Kris and I’m a lesbian. I’m buying several large bottles of vodka to hide under my bed in hopes that my life partner Kim doesn’t find them.

by Anonymousreply 8March 28, 2019 10:29 PM

Kris is in the Kirkland, long-sleeve flannel section, too.^^ She's stocking up for winter and buying some for Kim, too.

by Anonymousreply 9March 28, 2019 10:31 PM

I'm Hot Costco Dad's sausage

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 10March 28, 2019 10:33 PM

WAAHH!!! stinkly linky R10

by Anonymousreply 11March 28, 2019 10:39 PM

Here you go R11

https://www.cnbc.com/2019/03/28/watch-viral-video-of-hot-costco-dad-overjoyed-about-his-savings.html

I'm the single person, holding onto my nerves for dear life, trying with all my might, NOT to run over the people who stop in the middle of the crowded aisle to chat, eat samples, look around, etc.

by Anonymousreply 12March 28, 2019 10:42 PM

Dammit

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 13March 28, 2019 10:42 PM

Dammit AGAIN.

Just google "hot Costco Dad"

by Anonymousreply 14March 28, 2019 10:43 PM

R14, lol. A+ for effort.

by Anonymousreply 15March 28, 2019 10:45 PM

I'm all of the raving over the bad Costco pizza.

by Anonymousreply 16March 28, 2019 10:47 PM

Thanks for all the efforts, R14. Costco dad is hot for daddy lovers, and everyone should see.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 17March 28, 2019 10:59 PM

Ohhhh let me Costco dad’s sweaty asshole. Yum!

by Anonymousreply 18March 28, 2019 11:03 PM

Swallow before shopping!

by Anonymousreply 19March 28, 2019 11:07 PM

"I'm the ginormous bottle of Sangria she's buying."

Ms. Frau is obviously not in any Costco in the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania.

by Anonymousreply 20March 28, 2019 11:08 PM

R17 Him? DL Hot.

by Anonymousreply 21March 28, 2019 11:11 PM

Her?

by Anonymousreply 22March 28, 2019 11:13 PM

Looks like an 🥚.

by Anonymousreply 23March 28, 2019 11:14 PM

Overheard at a Rolling Stones concert: "Man, there's more 40-year old cleavage on display tonight than on any Saturday at Costco."

by Anonymousreply 24March 29, 2019 12:24 AM

I’m the black security guard at the door who asked me if I have a Costco card when I’m half way in the door and kicks me out when I said I don’t. I just wanted to eat free samples and get a churro. Never been stoped before. This sucks. (Happened last week, I was very high). Fuck you! Your just a Costco security guard, Costco security guard!

by Anonymousreply 25March 29, 2019 12:35 AM

I'm an Asian woman shopper. I might look tiny and demure, but I will fucking run you over with my cart without a thought if you are anywhere near something I want.

by Anonymousreply 26March 29, 2019 12:37 AM

I’m Chad. I work the sample table of frozen sirloin burgers on tooth picks. You can sirloin my burger any time chad. You timothee chalamet looking motherfucker

by Anonymousreply 27March 29, 2019 12:41 AM

A bit OT: my therapist gave me "homework" of going to Costco by myself, since I found the experience so overwhelming. It took some doing, but I managed. I still don't enjoy going there, but at least I am able to.

by Anonymousreply 28March 29, 2019 12:44 AM

[quote]…my therapist gave me "homework" of going to Costco by myself, since I found the experience so overwhelming…

I PREFER going to Costco by myself, as that way I don't have to continually watch that my partner isn't stuffing the cart with gallon containers of macadamia nuts or 48-packs of giant-sized Colgate toothpaste. He will buy anything if he thinks it's a bargain. I'm just the opposite, and won't get anything we don't actually need. Plus, there's this one Costco stock boy I get to ogle to my heart's content when I'm by myself.

by Anonymousreply 29March 29, 2019 1:24 AM

The odd obsession with middle aged, middle class, middle American women who are boring AF continues.

I can only assume it's because for many DLers, these women are somehow the competition, the female versions of themselves?

"Fraus" as a topic is easily one of DLs top 5

by Anonymousreply 30March 29, 2019 1:33 AM

I'll be Winter Storm Shaquan, sending droves of them to Costco in horrifying panic to stock up on a bunch of the same shi t they already have a plenty at home. I'm all anyone has been talking about for the past few days, and I take great pleasure in the secret that I'll leave just a coating behind in my wake!

Suckaaaaaaas!

by Anonymousreply 31March 29, 2019 1:37 AM

I'm the person observing the presence of 50 "butchers" and 0 employees that aren't working the cash or spreading cheese-based samples on crackers.

by Anonymousreply 32March 29, 2019 1:42 AM

I'm Mother Earth crying from the waste of all those plastic sample cups!

by Anonymousreply 33March 29, 2019 2:46 AM

I'm the person who has been somehow conned into thinking that they are spending less when they shop at Costco.

by Anonymousreply 34March 29, 2019 2:52 AM

R29: lol. It seems every Costco has at least a few young’uns bringing the pretty.

by Anonymousreply 35March 29, 2019 2:52 AM

Not your day with the links!

by Anonymousreply 36March 29, 2019 3:02 AM

We're the people blocking the aisles in order to feed on the food samples -

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 37March 29, 2019 3:06 AM

I find the "meat men" hot. Love the portion sizes (wink, wink).

by Anonymousreply 38March 29, 2019 3:06 AM

I'm the three 100 pound pasta bags Joan just threw in the cart to feed all 2 of her homeschooled kids.

by Anonymousreply 39March 29, 2019 3:12 AM

You don’t need a Costco card to access the pharmacy. The guard was misinformed.

by Anonymousreply 40March 29, 2019 3:13 AM

I'm the tanker cars filled with corn syrup, petrochemicals and pesticides. I'll be making my way to Costco aisles near you, in one form or another.

by Anonymousreply 41March 29, 2019 3:16 AM

I'm the woman communicating with her over-compensating husband via walkie talkie while her brood treats her shopping cart like a mobile jungle gym.

by Anonymousreply 42March 29, 2019 3:20 AM

Thank you R17 and R14. I did my best with Hot Dad's Link.

by Anonymousreply 43March 29, 2019 3:30 AM

Ok probably true r30 but in fairness this thread is actually about Costco ...... which confirms your theory that these supposed frau-bashing posters are just a bunch of gay male fraus.

by Anonymousreply 44March 29, 2019 11:30 AM

I picked up a darling synthetic-blend blouse for a fraction of what it would have cost me at Marshall's. So I bought three, all different colors!

by Anonymousreply 45March 29, 2019 11:55 AM

I'm a 30ish space cadet frauette high on adderall and psych meds pushing her six year old daughter who's sits in the basket part of the shopping cart. She's pleasantly chirps asking her what she should buy for dinner pointing out and various frozen appetizers while the little girl seems uninterested and doesn't say much of anything.

by Anonymousreply 46March 29, 2019 5:37 PM

r24, maybe 20 years ago. Today at a Rolling Stones concert it would be 60 year old cleavage. Today's 40 year old cleavage would be at the Backstreet Boys reunion tour.

by Anonymousreply 47March 29, 2019 5:42 PM

I'm the "busy" frau who blindly shops thinking every thing at Costco is a steal. Even though it's not. But I pay to shop here so it must be a crazy deal. I mean look at the size of it! There's no way half of these things are actually cheaper in other stores. Even though they are. Bless this mess!

by Anonymousreply 48March 29, 2019 5:45 PM

I thought I was the only one suffering with anxiety at a crowded Costco. I have to shop super early.

by Anonymousreply 49March 29, 2019 5:48 PM

[quote] I’m the dumb whore you encounter in every isle.

Oh

Dear

by Anonymousreply 50March 29, 2019 5:49 PM

[quote] my therapist gave me "homework" of going to Costco by myself, since I found the experience so overwhelming.

What 8n the fuck is overwhelming about Costco unless you have dementia? It’s a place with parking lots, shopping carts and big food with pajamas, socks & marked down books.. What’s overwhelming about that?

by Anonymousreply 51March 29, 2019 5:54 PM

Oooh, r51, come sit by me!

by Anonymousreply 52March 29, 2019 5:56 PM

I’m...HER!!!

They are OUT of 6lb bags of Kirkland pistachios! Can you believe that?

Where’s the manager?

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 53March 29, 2019 5:58 PM

Somebody who’s making fun of people in Costco had to go to a therapist because they were so psychologically overwhelmed by being in a Costco?

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 54March 29, 2019 6:04 PM

i am that $60 saved by refusing to pay a store to actually shop there.

so, even tho am not shopping at costco: PFFT.

by Anonymousreply 55March 29, 2019 6:05 PM

I'm the bored employee half-assedly checking their receipt on their way out.

by Anonymousreply 56March 29, 2019 7:52 PM

I am a gay 24 year old dude and I fucking LOVE Costco

by Anonymousreply 57March 29, 2019 8:30 PM

Costcos always seem to have a lot of hot, young, dumb guys working there.

by Anonymousreply 58March 29, 2019 8:32 PM

I'm the box of Tampax Super Plus Tampons, 120 ct some fat frau cunt just dumped into her basket.

by Anonymousreply 59March 29, 2019 8:47 PM

R26 What state? I have had that happen several times at my Costco

by Anonymousreply 60March 29, 2019 8:53 PM

[Quote] What state? I have had that happen several times at my Costco

Alhambra, Ca. The worst!

by Anonymousreply 61March 29, 2019 8:57 PM

R53, is that Kate Gosselin's new look? God she must have needed Costco and its oversized packaging for her freakin brood.

by Anonymousreply 62March 29, 2019 9:11 PM

I'm a granny frau wearing capri jeans looking at the capris. My shins are very shiny.

by Anonymousreply 63March 29, 2019 9:11 PM

I am Debbie and I am trying to find Dr. Scholl's kiosk for orthotics. My feet have been hurting and my now retired husband needs them too when he's not watching Fox News.

by Anonymousreply 64March 29, 2019 9:38 PM

[quote]I’m the black security guard at the door who asked me if I have a Costco card when I’m half way in the door and kicks me out when I said I don’t. I just wanted to eat free samples and get a churro. Never been stoped before. This sucks. (Happened last week, I was very high). Fuck you! Your just a Costco security guard, Costco security guard!

Membership has its privileges, bitch!

by Anonymousreply 65March 29, 2019 9:42 PM

I made a special trip on one of my tender-to-the-touch days and was disappointed that Kirkland doesn't have anything to treat my fibro.

by Anonymousreply 66March 29, 2019 9:43 PM
Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 67March 29, 2019 11:02 PM
Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 68March 29, 2019 11:02 PM
Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 69March 29, 2019 11:02 PM

I'm the triple jumbo containers of Miralax in Kay's mobility scooter.... I know people think I can walk just fine, but between my lupus and my 1st grader's "B" on a spelling test, I just can't find the strength some days.

by Anonymousreply 70March 30, 2019 2:22 AM

I'm the Frau embarrassingly stocking up on the oversized big box of tampons.

by Anonymousreply 71April 10, 2019 12:32 PM

I’m fat.

by Anonymousreply 72April 10, 2019 12:37 PM

I live a couple of blocks from Costco. They have some unique things that aren't readily available elsewhere.

by Anonymousreply 73April 10, 2019 12:41 PM

they all move so fucking fast with those big carts at Costco. Those frau's are in a big hurry to buy their shit, get out and do more shit for themselves.

by Anonymousreply 74April 10, 2019 12:41 PM

I’m Jillian and I’m buying the non-GMO water bottles even though there is no such thing as Genetically Modified water. And I care about our planet, but not enough to stop buying a 36 pack of plastic water bottles to drink even tho I have safe water to drink from the tap and filtered water from the fridge.

by Anonymousreply 75April 10, 2019 12:48 PM

it is amazing how selfish people are in their daily life. i notice this when i'm in stores like Costco, Target, and Walmart. They are on a mad mission to get their shit, check out, and get the hell out of the store in record time. Off to the next selfish activity.

by Anonymousreply 76April 10, 2019 12:51 PM

I’m the 100 foot measuring tape Costco sells. The 300 pounders buy me when they go on a diet.

by Anonymousreply 77April 10, 2019 1:03 PM

[quote]I'm the box of Tampax Super Plus Tampons, 120 ct some fat frau cunt just dumped into her basket.

I am the abortion that R59's mother should have had.

by Anonymousreply 78April 10, 2019 1:50 PM

I'm the pick-your-ethnicity herd family shopping as a group. Each item is taken from the shelf, and all five of the adults commiserate on whether or not it's worth buying, as the six children run around like hellions.

by Anonymousreply 79April 10, 2019 1:53 PM

I'm getting a five-pack of cotton bikini briefs. I don't mind wearing my old ones with period stains but Trey says they skeeve him out.

by Anonymousreply 80April 10, 2019 1:57 PM

I am the Frau going to Sam's club because Costco is too mainstream and déclassé.

by Anonymousreply 81April 10, 2019 2:03 PM

I'm the frau attempting to stuff a 96-pack of Kirkland brand toilet paper into her shopping cart. It should last 5-7 days in my family frausehold.

by Anonymousreply 82April 10, 2019 2:08 PM

I'm the suburban gal on a weekday afternoon saving a few pennies with a bulk 100-pack of Always maxi-pads long super without wings.

by Anonymousreply 83April 15, 2019 12:27 AM

I'm the frau who sits in her gargantuan SUV after shopping.

I see all the other frazzled drivers stalking my space, but I don't care. I'm busy on Facebook Live telling everyone how awesome my shopping trip was, and how many of the hot dads there were checking out my skimpy top and super-cute shorty-shorts!!!

I'm so much more important than anyone who'd like to park and do their own shopping.

by Anonymousreply 84April 15, 2019 1:07 AM

I’m the cart left in the middle of frozen desserts while the Frau wanders off to look at frozen appetizers which is located in the next aisle. But she’s tired of pushing the cart and wants her hands free. So she’s left the half full cart - in the middle of the aisle. TEE HEE.

by Anonymousreply 85April 15, 2019 2:39 AM

Look at all these preservative and sodium filled crap I can nuke and feed to my family in 2 seconds and save some time for me.

by Anonymousreply 86April 15, 2019 5:37 AM
Loading
Need more help? Click Here.

Yes indeed, we too use "cookies." Take a look at our privacy/terms or if you just want to see the damn site without all this bureaucratic nonsense, click ACCEPT. Otherwise, you'll just have to find some other site for your pointless bitchery needs.

×

Become a contributor - post when you want with no ads!