Let's pretend we are the year 2000.

It was 2001 you nit wit.

I'm Queen of the World Britney Spears, ultra low-rise jeans and sparkling belly ring

I’m Napster!

I’m AOL. Everyone uses me.

I’m the last dying gasp of civility and culture before 9/11 fucks up everyone’s view of the world and makes everyone way more inconsiderate assholes

I'm the Gap In-Store Playlists for Y2K, the best year for the Gap Playlists in the 2000s, followed by 2005.

I'm Gap Khakis! Everyone is wearing me!

I’m Kid A being released right before the “election” of 2000.

I'm the idiot Nader supporter who refuses to vote for Gore because "Democrats are just as evil as Republicans."

I will not learn my lesson from what's about to happen, and will repeat the mistake 16 years from now.

I'm the Y2K chatroom on Yahoo. All but forgotten after the dreaded reckoning never came to pass, was used by my friends and I as a "private" chatroom until it was shut down in 2002.

I’m the Juicy Couture track suit.

Good one R9!

I’m the archived records of R10 exchanging kiddie pics in the Yahoo! Y2K chatroom

I'm most everyone and I have money in the bank!

I’m “Strangers With Candy.” I’m still on the air, and one of the last reasons to get cable TV.

My days are numbered, though.

I’m the bunker my owner created due to Y2K.

I will not be used.

I'm Supreme Beings of Leisure. My songs are everywhere including Target commercials.

I'm Tina Turner's cover of "Baby, I'm A Star" which will also be a Target ad for Holiday 2000!

AOL Keyword: Target

I’m Mad Cow Disease!

I'm the Vogue.com message boards, through which I discovered Datalounge.

The lights are dimming, the computers are booting and rebooting... It's time for another Brown Out here in California.

Everyone go home!

I'm gay.com chat.

I'm my (relative) youth and health. I'm blissfully unaware how sorely I'll be missed in 19 years. 😪

I'm P!nk, the anti-Britney Spears and I'm not apologizing for it. I'm also uncomfortable as hell being marketed as an r&b artist singing Destiny Child-like songs.

I'm En Vogue, filing for unemployment.

I’m the last year before everything changes and the world goes to hell.

I'm reality TV, I'm new and cheap and novel right now, and many of you love me. But you will find there is a heavy price to pay for me. A big, fat-assed price.

I don't remember what channel but they played Prince's "I am going to party like it is 1999" for their New Years Eve celebration on NYE 2000, which made zero since to me.

I'm the Thong Song, Spring Break 2000's unofficial anthem.

I used to think of CNN as the Condit Nightly News. Endless speculation without any real proof or facts. I thought journalism could not get any worse. I was wrong.

I’m Music, Madonna’s last #1 song in the U.S.

I'm 'Survivor!'

And I'm still here!

The first US 'Big Brother' features Julie Chen's original face!

And a guy with in-the-moment bleached tips!

r2, and no actual musical talent to speak of.

R34 and R35 have no idea how to do a “let’s be” thread.

I'm America's latest sweetheart! Be sure to watch me on my new show "Time Of Your Life"!

I’m The Michael Richards’ Show.

We’ll be great and on for years to come.

Im the gay activist fighting for civil union.

I’m the gigantic, black platform sandal/mule that every woman is wearing right now.

I’m the datalounge

I'm Hillary Clinton. I will ruin the world in 16 years

I'm Whitney, calling it a career.

Look at me! I bought the last Miata year built in Japan!

I'm the US release of 'Lipslide,' Sarah Cracknell's first solo album, three years after its release in the rest of the world.

We're Doug Henning, Jim Varney, Roger Vadim, Charles Schulz, Tom Landry, Claire Trevor, David Merrick, Steve Reeves, Douglas Fairbanks, Jr., Craig Stevens, Dame Barbara Cartland, Sir John Gielgud, Nancy Marchd, Walter Matthau, Sir Alec Guinness, Loretta Young, Richard Mulligan, Pierre Trudeau, Julie London, Steve Allen, Werner Klemperer, Kirsty MacColl, John Lindsay, Billy Barty, Victor Borge, and Jason Robards.

We all died.

I'm Tower Records, stacked with oodles and oodles of high quality CD's, DVD's, a smattering of vinyl, and a killer magazine selection.

I’m [italic]Family Guy[/italic], the irregularly scheduled, irreverent, blasphemous, vulgar, perverted, mean-spirited, and often hilarious cartoon sitcom that Fox is trying to kill by putting up against [italic]Friends[/italic], which never should have aired in the first place.

I’m Gary Coleman controlling his anger as the TV channel changer lands at Rick Schroder’s speech to the GOP convention. Remember, Gar, your probation’s almost up; stay cool don’t blow this like you did the security guard job and that Norm MacDonald movie. Use that [italic]Simpsons[/italic] guest star money wisely since Mom and Dad can’t touch it.

I'm the sound of a dial-up modem in the background. I'm still around, just less.

I’m the biggest song of the year.

Bleached tips, chin goatee, Abercrombie necklace... SO Y2K!

I'm Janet's #1 smash "Nothing Really Matters", booting Beyonce and Timberlake off the charts.

I'm Destiny's Child!

We're the Jonas Brothers at 12, 10 & 7 years old respectively. We are secretly parallel-thinking and plotting our way out of the Fundie mess our batshit parents into which our parents have thrust us. We will use our musical skills acquired in Church to aid us in this escape endeavour. All we need is some Big Money backing..

Children born this year won't know what snow looks like!

All ski resorts in the northern hemisphere will have to close for lack of snow by 2010!

Milk and gasoline will be ten dollars a gallon by 2010!

All our port cities will be under water by 2015!

I'm a global warming expert! The science is settled!

I’m the guaranteed, can’t miss bit of the new millennium’s first TV season: Bette Midler’s TV sitcom.

Bit = hit

[quote]Im the gay activist fighting for civil union.

While slowly stabbing us in the back in the name of el-jibbity in ways that will start to manifest themselves horribly over the next 20 years.

We’re the next generation of gay men being physically emasculated by carbs in everything and Big Pharma’s butchery and stealth bigotry.

I'm Reese Witherspoon's hair in American Psycho.

Horrible

I'm gasoline and I'm $1.19 per gallon, even in Los Angeles.

I’m me in my sophomore year of college. I just got an internship at Universal Music Group in NYC! One day I’m gonna work at a major record label. The record industry is booming and I’m gonna be part of that! CD sales are through the roof! There’s so much money to be made. On a side note, one of my neighbors in my dorm just showed me this thing called Napster on his Compaq desktop computer where you can, like.. get songs for free? I don’t know what this is, but it sounds like a good way to get a virus on your PC! Anyway... the year 2000 is great and I’m sure if I do great I can return in the fall is 2001, which will be a great time to work in lower Manhattan!

Wow, R64. That's both funny and sad.

I'm the gingko biloba capsules you keep on hand to improve memory.

R65 I turned out just fine. I went into radio instead, just about to start year 12 at SiriusXM. I also eventually figured Napster out.

I'm the Spice Gurls. Even hitmaker Rodney Jerkins can't save us.

I’m women’s ultra-low-rise jeans. My zipper only has six teeth. Women have to get Brazilian waxes to wear me.

I'm the thong underwear required to wear ultra-low-rise jeans. Exposed for everyone to see!

I'm the shitty CGI in movies, which rubes and video game addicts think is so amazing. I diminish the visuals in nearly every movie until they all look like playstation games.

I’m Total Request Live on MTV. Carson Daley shows XTina his Genie in the Bottle in between breaks while Fred Durst wonders who she gave head to first......

I'm the Y2K aesthetic!

I'm a kept list of Gap store playlists.

If only there was a place or someone that would appreciate them.

I’m Slim Shady, the real Slim Shady, and all the other Shadies are just imitating.

I’m a desperado underneath your window. I feel a mad connection with your body.

I'm Titans and will soon join Nightingales, Models Inc. Savannah, 2000 Malibu Road, Winnetka Road and Malibu Shores as one of Aaron Spelling's shitshows.

R44 it's a MIATA!

I'm the musical genre visual-kei. Despite my incalculable success and game-changing effect on Eastern popular arts throughout the 80s & 90s I'm about to be ripped the fuck off, adulterated and repackaged by Western cookie-cutter rockers out-of-work and looking to cash in while not knowing thing one about my cultural significance.

It's ok though, I will go underground for the next couple decades, to rise again..

I'm What Lies Beneath, reviving Diana Scarwid's career.

We are Drake & Josh, meeting for the first time face-to-face on an episode of Nickelodeon's DOUBLE DARE 2000.

We've fallen in adorable puppy love at first sight, but naturally we're disguising our feelings as animosity and rivalry because we're 13 year-old American boys and we're performing comedy skits on a game-show for little kids. Also this is still only the year 2000 and gays-of-the-future aren't lauded on television at this point in time. We're hoping we don't cross paths again and so this awkwardness will go away forever. Little do we realise...

I'm The Sopranos. I'm a game changer for HBO.