Merry Christmas from the Christmas Moose!

My, you're a majestic Christmas Moose! Merry Christmas to you, too!

What the fuck ever happened to the Christmas Mouse?

Christmas Moose?!? WTF???

You’ve never heard of the Christmas Moose, R2?

I like to think of Christmastime as an opportunity, an excuse really, to give gifts to people I care about, but to whom I don’t normally give gifts, because of a lack of a gift-giving event, and convention.

Mr. Moose, what is your opinion of the Mediapolis/DL mascot genocide? Do you fear for your life?

Also are you Della?

[quote] R5: Mr. Moose, what is your opinion of the Mediapolis/DL mascot genocide? Do you fear for your life

No, dear. Not with a song in my heart, a star in my eye, and a poem in my mind! I trust to Providence.

And I’m not Della, haha! I’m me! I’m Christmas Moose! Merry Christmas, to both you and Della!

[quote] I trust to Providence.

I thought you were in Stoneman?

Della likes animals that talk jokes.

Still waiting for the Christmas Mouse to make an appearance....it ain't Christmas until he shows up.

I am in Stoneham but I just love the Providence accent. Especially when it appears in a historical context, such as used by a Civil War Militia in a movie. It’s so anachronistic, but still tells you exactly who they are. It’s a completely different accent than Southie (Boston) or Brooklyn. They all rival each other in “unusualness”, shall we say. I’d like to see a comedy skit someday, where an elite boarding school debate has three young debaters affecting that accent. I think it’d be a scream!

Many blessings to you all!

Love,

[quote] Still waiting for the Christmas Mouse to make an appearance....it ain't Christmas until he shows up.

The Christmas Mouse is dead, son. Accept it.

The moose is not affiliated with the mouse. That’s been established. It’s not like they're cousins, nor have a business relationship.

I’m wrapping gifts, but I really could use some help. Does anyone know of a wrapping service? No thumbs, here.

HOORAY!!! Merry Christmas and a Happy and Prosperous New Year to you and yours, Christmas Moose! It's so wonderful to hear from you!

CM, why don’t you ask FOCM? He has opposable thumbs and has experience sheathing things. What’s a friend for if not for gift wrapping and help moving?

Christmas Moose, did you get paroled or did you break out?

Well this is all very nice, Christmas Moose, but I'm waiting for Moosifer.

Oh, didn’t you know, R16? FOCM [italic] is [/italic] Moosifer!

Thank you, R15. Do you wrap gifts, by any chance?

I refuse to believe that, R19. You are more likely to be Moosifer than Christmas Moose.

Well toots R21, Merry Christmas anyway!

Would you like to tell me what you’d like for Christmas? If you don’t tell me, you’re getting socks from Saks. I’m telling you now, so...

The Christmas Moose can speak English!

Did you learn it from a book?

He is Canadian.

I also speak French, which is legally required in Canada if you want to be a Christmas Mouse. I also know elk and reindeer, and can speak a passable Holstein.

Here’s a reindeer friend of mine who “went Hollywood”.

I miss this moose

Oops! I meant, “Christmas Moose”. Not “Mouse”. I hate it when I do that.

[quote] I also speak French, which is legally required in Canada if you want to be a Christmas Mouse.

Suspicious. I keep on thinking this moose might be Moosifer and not our beloved Moose. The Moose we know doesn’t “sound” like this “Moose”. Something is off.

Bwaaaaaaa! R29!

juullimi pilluarit ᑐᒃᑐᕙᒃ

I’m just trying to be the best Christmas Moose I can be, is that so bad?

R31 = Harvey Fierstein. Is Harvey Fierstein actually Moosifer? They’re about the same size.

I think Moosifer has more hair than Harvey Fierstein.

I got this for the Christmas Moose. I couldn’t find a new Eeyore. Do you think he’ll like it? I don’t want any dramatics this year.

That’s adorable, FOCM!

It’s also his birthday on the 25th. He gets fussy if you forget that. God forbid you forget a birthday cake!

He gets pussy?

Fussy, fussy. F.u.s.s.y. Jeesh!

Sorry, R39. I needed to get my reading monocle.

I demand to know what happened to the CHRISTMAS MOUSE!!!!!! And why everybody just acts like the Christmas Moose taking his place is the most natural thing in the world!

Am I in the Twilight Zone?

I miss the Mouse, too.

Every time a bell rings a moose gets its wings

This sculpture is allegorical. The Christmas Moose doesn’t really have wings. He just flaps his gums.

I just got my teeth cleaned for the big day. In case I get to kiss some moose under the Mistletoe. Whadda you think?

I don’t believ R45 is the Christmas Moose.

I don’t believe R45 is the Christmas Moose.

You might have said something nice about my teeth, R46!

He had some work done on his snout, R46!

Oh, no!

He’s in! Nothing can stop this Moose!

Here’s the Santa tracker, at the link. Santa’s in Milan at this moment, I understand. Rudolph will do the Canada handoff to the Christmas Moose soon! I won’t be doing the reporting on his trip this year, you can follow along yourselves at the link.

Oh! I hope he manages ok! I worry about him!

Santa’s in Edinburgh. I know I said I wouldn’t do this but I can’t resist. It’s only once a year and I love the Santa tracker.

Why aren’t you actively tracking, FOCM? Do you have a Christmas Eve “bun in your oven” so to speak.

Christmas Moose is in Saint John, New Brunswick, Canada, this very minute! Go Moosie!

Santa’s doing that wacky thing again this year where he goes up and down the globe, instead of across Canada. Poor Christmas Moose! He needs a better navigator. Where’s Carl the pig? Is this his doing?

He’s hitting Guantánamo now. Probably a short stop.

DC in 1 minute. Another quick stop.

He’s heading up towards Stoneham so I have to put the animals to sleep. Back after that.

Phili next and over 5 billion gifts delivered. That will go up considerably as Canadians are so much nicer than everyone else, and Canada is coming up.

Finished with New York. Did you get your gifts?

He just flew over the zoo! Giselle the Gazelle was having trouble getting to sleep, so I hit her on the head with a hammer. She’s asleep, now. Looks like most everybody got socks.

I got bitcoins and options in Apple stock. No Google stock this year, though.

I gotta go to bed now. I hope everybody gets their heart’s desire, tonight, and over the next year!

What am I? Chopped liver?

[quote] He’s hitting Guantánamo now

I love gu-ca-mole!

[quote] He’s heading up towards Stoneham so I have to put the animals to sleep.

Murderer, FOCM! Pure murderer!

Is the plural of moose moose or mooses?

Or meese?

I prefer meese. The plural of attorney general is Eds Meeses.

Merry Christmas Mooses (will go with that)! You should have some ornaments hanging on your antlers.

....

Happy Birthday, Christmas Moose and Jesus!

That’s lovely, R68; but a horrific copywrite infringement.

FOCM, please ask CM to do his thing OUTSIDE. That was not the gift I expected to find this morning.

At least you got [italic] something, [/italic] R71!

❤️ Christmas Moose!

What’s going on today in your world? I’m getting my hoofs polished and antlers painted.

R74 seems too vain to be the real Moose.

R123 reminds me, monthly payment of grounds-maintenance fees for the cemetery plot. I think most cemeteries today charge a fee for “perpetual care”, as part of the purchase price, and no longer offer monthly-billing.

I recently learned that my Grandpa Otto, who died in 1927, had accrued a few grand in maintenance fees that none of use knew about. It’s the length of time that made it so expensive. Nobody is going to offer to pay for a memorial stone.

I need to hear more.

Good tidings to you, Christmas Moose! My mum bought my brother a novelty doorstop in the shape of a moose wearing a Santa hat for Christmas. I thought of you as soon as I saw it.

Wrong thread, R76?

Apparently so, R78. Please ignore R76. Sorry!

That’s adorable, R77! I get a peanut for every one that is sold! Can’t wait to get my new peanut. Cheers and happy New Year!

Happy New Year from the Christmas Moose!

I’m sticking around until Little Christmas on 1/6/19, then it’s back to the grind-Stone Zoo. Hahaha! That’s what we call it, it’s too hilarious! Haha!

Love,

Happy New Year, Christmas Moose! Fine looking pic at op....

Yay Christmas Moose! I have to admit, though, that there was another moose that I wanted for Christmas ...

Thank you, R82.

Hey Christmas Moose! Happy New Year to ya... too.

Do moose (meese or mooses) have beards?

Oh, I love you, Bullwinkle!

Maybe, R86.

My Great Uncle Gustav has a goiter, does that count?

It does count, CM at R88. Thank you.

Today is “Little Christmas!” Sorry to those of you who got socks. We ran out of stuffed Eeyores, Tigger the Tigers, and jumbo bags of peanuts.

I’m headed back to the Stone Zoo today, as they really can’t run the show without me. Plus, I miss Mama.

See you next year!

Love,

Later... Christmas Moose! Smooches...

Big sloppy moose smooches to you too, R91,