Why does Belgium even exist?!

Stupid Flanders.

We need them for waffles.

John Oliver agrees with you, OP.

Belgians are wild

Because the Flemish and Walloons hate the Dutch and French far more than they hate each other.

It's strange, but most of the Belgians I've met so far had very Italian-sounding last names. Apparently a big percentage of the local population is of Italian descent.

In New Belgium all seems to breathe freedom and peace and to make one forget the world and its sad turmoils.

In 1830-31, the southern provinces of the Netherlands seceded from the United Kingdom of the Netherlands and established the independent Kingdom of Belgium. Although this new kingdom comprised of Dutch-speaking Flemings and French-speaking Walloons, they were united in their Catholic faith and agarian way of life, and viewed the Dutch Reform, industrial north with suspicion.

R6 So does that make Belgium the New Jersey of Europe?

Yes, R9. Precisely.

Flanders has big ol' bunny rabbits—TA HAVE, SEE?

I love you, R1.

R11 Which the Belgians find quite tasty braised with ale.

Why do any of us exist?

Why does the U.S. even exist?! How come the SouthWest wasn't simply annexed to Mexico and the rest to Canada during the course of history.

Belgium exists to keep France from crashing into Holland.

Actually, I heard that neither France nor Holland wanted to see the other incorporating the territory into their nation, so they carved out a new country.

Likewise, Uruguay was created because Brazil and Argentina didn’t want the other controlling the territory.

Vhen yoo are one day veeciously stabbed to death on a train by twelve or feefteen peeple, I vill NOT eenvestigate your murder, OP.

Belgium sucks ass

For the chocolate.

R19 *Ahem*

This is a random factoid. In 1985, I went on my first trip to Europe, Eurailpass in hand. I started in the Netherlands and intended to go next to France. I took the train from Amsterdam to Paris, which passes through Belgium. Midway (Brussels), the train stopped and the announcement was made that all travelers had to disembark. The French-speaking workers of the railroad had gone on strike, so the trains weren't traveling beyond Brussels. I took a train to Cologne and continued through Germany. Two weeks later, (after Germany, Austria, and Italy), I took the train to Paris through Switzerland. When I left France on the overnight train to Amsterdam for my return flight home, we got as far as Brussels, and the announcement was made that now the Dutch (Flemish) speaking train workers were going on strike and everyone had to disembark. Again, I had to take the train to Cologne, and find a bus that would take me to Schiphol Airport. I was left with the question - "why couldn't the damn railroad workers all go on strike at the same time, and why were the strikes organized the the language of the workers?"

So that Germany can invade them first.

So that they could originally create potato fries, of course!

But don’t say that out loud in France. It can start a bar fight.

I really hate doing this, seriously. This has been a rather light-hearted thread. I have ancestors in Belgium, and I'm heartily ashamed of that. It would be idiotic of me to ever post that I'm sorry, because there are some things for which you can't atone. When I go to church (yes, I still do), I pray against all the hate that's come before me. I know it isn't accomplishing anything, other than to keep me from drowning in shame.

[quote]All blacks saw this man as the devil of the Equator ... From all the bodies killed in the field, you had to cut off the hands. He wanted to see the number of hands cut off by each soldier, who had to bring them in baskets ... A village which refused to provide rubber would be completely swept clean. As a young man, I saw [Fiévez's] soldier Molili, then guarding the village of Boyeka, take a net, put ten arrested natives in it, attach big stones to the net, and make it tumble into the river ... Rubber causes these torments; that's why we no longer want to hear its name spoken. Soldiers made young men kill or rape their own mothers and sisters.

Yeah, I was just about to suggest people really needed to look up King Leopold when the OP said it was Bosnia *without* the ethnic cleansing.

Oh, really?

R25, So I didn't reference Bosnia, when the OP posted about Belgium (which is on the other side of the continent)? Go fuck yourself, you tiresome twat, R25. You must dwell under rocks, looking to create a ugliness as a scavenger in the nastiest tidal pools.

Belgians excel at flash mobs.

"So I didn't reference Bosnia, when the OP posted about Belgium (which is on the other side of the continent)? Go fuck yourself, you tiresome twat, [R25]. You must dwell under rocks, looking to create a ugliness as a scavenger in the nastiest tidal pools."

Wow, the election has everybody really riled up.

I wasn't criticizing you. I didn't think you needed to reference Bosnia. You did great, not that you need my approval.

So you know, you're welcome. Come sit by the fire. Put your feet up. Have a nice mug of whatever you really want to have a nice mug of.

Chillax, dude.

You haven't lived until you have eaten fries cooked in horse rennet. Delicious.

Belgian food is so fatty and so tasty.

Beer, fries, chocolate, cheese, mussels, stew...

Both parts of Belgium were always part of the Netherlands. They split mostly due to religion: the Dutch are Protestant and the Belgians are Catholic. I could see the Walloons eventually joining France or becoming independent eventually, but it’s been centuries since that area was under French rule.

Amusing comedy about French/Walloon animosity. Rien à déclarer (Nothing to Declare) with Belgian Walloon actor Benoît Poelvoorde and French actor Dany Boon.

The Belgians are the original racists. They did far worse things to the Congolese than even Hitler did to the Jews. And their King during WWII didn't leave and form a government in exile but cooperated with the Nazis. Belgians always get off, but they are evil.

R32 Hyperbole doesn't hide your complete ignorance of Hitler or the Holocaust.

Thank you, R27.

I love R14 and I love Belgium.

R27, that flash mob makes me wonder where they practiced. It couldn’t have been done without a lot of preparation, and all for a single performance?

Isn't Brussels like 99% Muslim now?

Because the world needs french fries with mayonnaise.

Belgium gave the world Carbonnade Flamande so I'm willing to forgive a little genocide here or there.

Love the story by R21.

Three years ago, I travelled by train from Cologne to Paris. We stopped at Brussels. We didn't disembark, but the whole station was closed, nothing and nobody except armed men in uniforms - we stayed like this for 40 mins. Eventually we learned that there had been a shooting aboard a train that was travelling a couple hours ahead of ours. Clint Eastwood made a movie about it.

The country can't be all bad. It gave us this guy . . .

R31 two actors who are both major comedy stars in France and Belgium. They can open almost any movie.

r41, he's my ideal.

well, they also gave us Jean-Claude van Damme

“French” fries aren’t French. They’re most likely Belgian. At one point they were actually called French-Belgian fries.

But given that most of the world doesn’t care about Belgium and sometimes even forgets that it exists, people dropped the “-Belgian” part and simply called them “French fries”.

Are there no Belgian musicians? I never hear of a Belgian musician.

R44 - he wasn't bad looking when he was young.

They may have waffles but they do NOT have pancakes.

[quote] Why does Belgium even exist?!

It’s a geographic accident. Those do happen time to to time.

[quote]two actors who are both major comedy stars in France and Belgium. They can open almost any movie.

R42 I'm well acquainted with both Poelvoorde and Boon, neither of whom I find particularly funny. Poelvoorde is surprisingly good in dramas, such as Une histoire d'amour and 3 Coeurs.

I posted that for the non-French/Belgians on this thread who might not realize who they are. Poelvoorde is a tragically talented man, if it were allowed on this forum I would say a genius. Being that perceptive must wear heavily on one's life.

I love mayo on French Fries.

R3 : ghetto website with pirate style development, AGAIN.

Are the people that work for it criminals?

Belgium has some excellent actors and directors; the Dardenne brothers, Yolande Moreau, Jeremie Renier, Virginie Efira, Olivier Gourmet (who does a lot of work in France when he's not working for the Dardennes), Emilie Dequenne, Koen de Bouw, Jan Decleir, Bouli Lanners and of course Matthias Schoenaerts. Unfortunately, with the exception of Schoenaerts, they're all unknown outside of Belgium, France and Holland.

R9, Europe even has the actual Italy in it.

Second R54

R21, that isn't a random factoid, that's a random anecdote.

Someone had to invent Belgian Farmhouse Style.

I liked R21's story, no matter what you call it.

Ever heard of Jaques Brel, r46?

I visited Belgium two years ago, and yes, it's sort of a bore when compared to all the countries around it.

That said, recently (as detailed on DL), I did hook up with a guy who is my sexual ideal--first time in my life the guy was sexually absolutely perfect for me--and he was a Belgian living in NYC.

R5 is correct. I was in a 3 year relationship with a Flemish from Ghent and boy do they hate to be called dutch or what? I'm South American but learned Dutch from the Netherlands, so people would nod at me constantly while trying to use it in Belgium they'd rather I spoke Spanish. True story.

Belgium's produced some of the best tennis players.

R21, I understand that “language” in Belgium is shorthand for the split between the two cultures there, and carries a significance there that is much broader than an American might imagine. I imagine that it’s the same in Quebec; and in Basque or Catalonia in Spain.

r60, I thought he was French.

Basque country is very open to tourists, so they pretend like they don't care, but ETA is nothing to sneeze at.

R62 reminds me. Years ago, I went to Prague with a friend who spoke Russian and we met some nice Czech boys. They told us that even if we met people who spoke Russian, we should speak English or German, but not Russian.

Such drama over language!

He even wrote a song about Brussels, R65.

R62 also reminds me of this one:

As a consequence of the three major wars from 1870 to 1945, one might think that the French would hate the Germans. They do dislike the Germans, but who they really hate are their allies, the English.

Hatred for the English dates back to Joan of Arc and the Hundred Years War, so.

Possibly even to William the Conqueror on the English side.

I'm not sure the French hate the Germans, and as a French woman I've met nothing but fantastic people in Germany. They didn't seem to hate, at all, and I've been to Cologne, Dusseldorf, Hamburg, Weimar... The Germans I've met in France were the same. I'm planning a trip to Munich and maybe Heidelberg next year.

[quote] Are there no Belgian musicians? I never heard of a Belgian musician.

To me the biggest surprise of dating a Belgian guy was to learn that Technotronic a hip hop/dance act I thought couldn't be more American is actually from Belgium.

[quote]one might think that the French would hate the Germans. They do dislike the Germans, but who they really hate are their allies, the English.

They hate the English (and the Yanks) for liberating them from Hitler and the Nazis, whom they got along quite well with.

Sadly France is very much like the Netherlands in that regard, R74, and it shows even today.

France is the classic example of Santayana's ignoring history and being doomed to repeat it. The French do have a penchant for authoritarian, hate-filled ideologies.

Ha. The British and the French don't hate each other at all. The French are massive Anglophiles and the British are massive Francophiles. The two nations share so much history it's ridiculous. They've often been rivals but they're still very close. You just have to look at the amount of French people living in the UK and the amount of British people living in France to see that.

Sadly, nowadays the biggest export of Belgium is pedophiles. Bryan Singer's pals are living there in Antwerp freely after escaping the US and Spain.

They also have one of the most depraved and debauched Royal families in Europe. Queen Paola is a cunt of the highest order.

30 reasons why we hate the French

Look who they have now, R76.

Because Queen Victoria's uncle needed a job.

R78 Well, that huge scandal some decades back was a network after all. That's what most of the scandal was about.

Continental Europeans sometimes dislike the Brits because the Brits have managed to emerge, by both good and bad means, as one of the most powerful and richest countries in the world.

That’s why you get more young Germans, French, Swedes, Poles, etc going to find jobs in London than vice versa.

If you’re one of the richest kids on the block (who also likes to throw his weight around a bit in the playground), other kids on the block will feel like you need to be taken down a peg.

Why the French hate the English

Belgium exists because they wouldn't give up the Catholic religion and because the Duke of Marlborough kept the French out. Full stop.

Battle of Ramillies. Duke of Marlborough kicked the fuck outta the French, who eventually went home. And Belgium was born.

Is this where the song comes from, R87?

It's the same duke. John Churchill.

Figaro! Figaro Figaro Figaro!

They currently have an amazing generation of football players. Check out Eden Hazard. He has such a fine ass.

Oh, my! Looks like you weren't joking, R91 - them buns is GORGEOUS!

I took a day trip from London to Brussels a couple of weeks ago. Hated it. People were rude (to an American - I can't blame them) but it's dirty and lacks any class or culture. A lot like Budapest.

Come on R93, you're just saying that cause you don't like waffles.

R84 is a good example of why so many people justifiably think that we Brits are arrogant assholes.

R85 I have no intention to buy a FT subscribtion, could you copy and paste the article on DL for us? I am French and I would like to be reminded why we can't stand the English.

Thank you!

R31 have you watched Le grand bain? Poelvoorde was very funny, as well as the rest of the cast.

I dated a Belgian guy for a couple of years and had flings with two others. All three are in my top ten fucks of my life. If they aren't appreciated, well, good, leave it to us who know.

R46 Stromae is good but there are others, what kind of music are you looking for? Do you mind french? (that's pretty much all the musicians I know except for Vaya con dios)

[quote]Come on [R93], you're just saying that cause you don't like waffles.

Heathen.

For anybody interested in french/english relationship, A 1000 years of annoying the french is really fun to read, for a history book...

Never thought the French boys film mafia would be trolling DL... Isn't their boys movie doing good box office?

Vlaamse Fritte as noted above!

R93, you bitch! You take that back! Éljen Budapest, Éljen Magyarország!

Jean Claude Van Damme's ass

Who could ever forget Belgian teen sensation Sandra Kim and her shoulder pads winning the Eurovision Song Contest in 1986 with 'J'aime la Vie'

French and Brit assholes hijacked a thread on Belgium. Typical.

R72 My experiences exactly mirror yours. I've had relatives live there off and on, and they loved their time there. I cherish the German friends I have now in the States. They are very calm and 100% drama free.

Is the Duke of Marlborough the reason the Belgians smoke so much.

R6 put this question to bed, ya mooks

Personally, I love R9. Producing the Dutch version of this appropriated black film was their undoing. Haarlem, Harlem same thing.

R32, we only care about evil white people hurting black people. Make every thread about this you old black racial preoccupation troll. Back to LSA with your stank ass.

R84 just described the malovent envy the Brits have for America.

R96, if you register you can get some free articles, but that one isn't worth it.

The List: Why the French hate the English

Sam Taylor FEBRUARY 26, 2011

As an Englishman who has lived in France for 10 years, the only anglophobia I’ve ever experienced has come on days such on Saturday, when the French rugby team faces its English counterpart. All civility is thrown aside. And my French friends, family and neighbours suddenly remember all the other things for which they hate the English.

1. Killing their heroes

One day my eldest son came back from primary school and asked me why the English had burned Joan of Arc. “I don’t know,” I admitted. “We were at war, weren’t we?” “But she was only 19 and she was a saint!” “Oh, sorry.”

Three years later: “Why did the English poison Napoleon?” “Well, I’m not sure that was ever proven.”

2. Crimes against food

The French are passionate about food. When I first ate dinner with my wife’s family, I couldn’t speak any French and thought I was in the middle of a huge row. People kept standing up and shouting, the table was slammed, drinks were spilled. Appalled, I asked my wife what was going on. “Oh, we’re talking about cakes,” she said. This probably helps explain the French ire against what the English have done to perfectly good food. Beef roasted to the consistency of leather; vegetables boiled into submission; desserts so stodgy they could anchor small boats. And then we conquered America and gave birth to McDonald’s.

3. Rise of the English language

Conquering America also ensured the demise of French as a global language. The French love their language and don’t see why they should have to learn another. It has also led to a fierce assault on the integrity of French, as English words and expressions have seeped into everyday speech, mainly through that errant breed, the “teenager”.

4. The expat invasion

The number of English people buying overpriced ruins and doing them up has increased exponentially. There are now villages in Brittany and Dordogne where the English outnumber the French. In spite of this, nobody has accused me of “invading” their country. This could be because my wife is French, or because our kids have grown up here, or because we pay tax here, or because I speak the language. It’s always the other expats the French don’t like: the ones who can’t understand the rude things being said about them.

5. Le crunch

In the south-west of France, where I live, nothing (except, possibly, food) arouses greater passion than rugby. And France v England is, to them, what England v Germany in football is to us: the match we desperately want to win and always seem – when it matters most – to lose. Two World Cup semi-finals in a row, the English have beaten the French. First time round, it was the rain that stopped them playing well. Second time round, the referee – and, well, they were exhausted after defeating the All Blacks. If England beats France in the Six Nations on Saturday, I don’t think there will be excuses: merely a Gallic shrug and “Il n’ya rien a dire”. They’ll never forget, though. Nor will they ever forgive.

Sam Taylor is a novelist and translator

R80 and R85 so obviously a black north american. Didn't click on any of the links posted by trolls above.

Not going to bother with English inadequacies in comparisons to France.

Just geography alone is a no brainer here. The reason why landlocked Germany needs to always be kept on watch.

Like NY state and California, France has it all.

Paris

The Alps

Southern beaches

Atlantic Ocean

Most beautiful castles and palaces

Provence produced goods

Champagne (province & product)

Vineyards producing finest wines and liquers

Top cosmetic houses

Finest military jets

Top couture and fashion houses

Top culinary and pastry

That's just the common known greatness of France. It goes so much deeper when you consider their overall standards. The finest of everything. Seeped into their breeding of the population for centuries. Compare the Brits, Germans and Italians here if you will. French is also the most precise language on the planet besides being pleasing to the ear. Centuries of high standards make a nation what it is today. Just like the Americans are universally known for their hard work ethic, innovative nature and the resiliency as a people to pull themselves up by the bootstraps and land on their feet. The legacy reflects overcoming past tribulations and rising like a phoenix from the ashes.

Paris IS the finest city in Europe. New York is the city center of North America. Tokyo is the NY/Paris of Asia. London can never touch these global hubs.

The average truly French person is a mix of fine genetic traits. That's the real reason French women are known to be thin and stylish. It's not their diet, smoking or love of outdoor activities. You're not gonna find the buggy, bulging baggy eyes so common north of the channel. Big noses are common in England, Germany and especially Italy. Not so much so in France. Their inherited body type physique reflects the nation's location with a fine admixture throughout history. The Normans got their start there. France also managed to grab a slice of North America in the 1600s.

French general cultural superiority can be witnessed without even leaving North America to this day. The French were really crafty and cherished the indigenous population in Canada. The brits considered north american indigenous peoples as "savages" and excluded them from their societies. Not the French. They mixed with indians and inuits early on diversifying their limited gene pool starting in the 17th century. Meshing those Norman traits with those of northern indigenous tribes created a super-hybrid. You can always tell a mostly British Canadian from a French Canadian just walking about in Toronto. The quebecers are otherworldly stunning exuding sensual mannerisms. Known for their good looks and high cultural standards the world over. No need to bring montreal or quebec city into this. I will bring New England into this though. The state of Vermont is not a fluke. It's the result of French culture built up by French Canadians.

Every thing they touch turns to gold

France will be majority Muslim within the not-too-distant future. It was good while it lasted.

R116 I hope that means they'll finally get restaurants with food that's actually edible in France. I love Northern African cuisine but fucking hate French food - why do they put fucking butter into everything?! I'd pick nice tajine over those vein-clogging frog specialities anytime.

R117 - Isn't the food from Provence less butter oriented?

r117 finding a good restaurant will be the least of your problems.

R116, you sound like POC trolls claiming the US will be a minority caucasian nature in the future. The white man is losing control! You wish.

Ever hear of the concept quality vs. quantity? You're not going to stop the caucasian race of bringing unheralded greatness wherever they land. France will always be the finest european nation and North America will always be superior to South America. Japan will always be #1 in Asia.

The only way america will be a white minority nation in the future is if lighter colored folks high tail it to colonies in outer space.

Stop with your systemic hatred and envy of whites and asians, R116.

You are the black equivalent of hillbilly white supremacists the world over. You BOTH need to stop polluting and poisoning the internet with ignorance concerning races of our human race.

Just admit that every race on this planet each posses their own unique gifts. Also admit that when our races mix the results are phenomenal. All of those gifts rolled into one. The reason why Americans set the cosmopolitan beauty standards.

Stay tuned because your racist ass is gonna be schooled but good.

R117, do you hear your black self?

[quote] OP: Why does Belgium even exist?!

I have no idea.

it has a strong economy and provides for its citizens well. You cant say that about all that many countries. Also a friend of mine has a belgium antique, a highboy dining cabinet. Its about the most beautiful piece of furniture Ive ever seen. That alone endears me to Belgium.

Also a world traveling from of mine from the USA has a close friend in banking in Belgium and it seems like banking is strong in the country and he makes a lucrative living. I get the impression Belgium is silmilar to Sweden and people arent showy and they save and invest a hell of a lot of what they make. Its like what America strives for economically and politically but instead is going in the opposite direction and is turning into a banana republic.

Finally Belgium is not a religious country generally and the only citizens that focus on religion are the very elderly right near the end of their lives and then only a small percent of the popuation do. DO you know how much grief that saves that country in its lack of religious fanatasism?

I WISH the US didn't have all these religious nutters. We'd have a much better and ironically a much kinder society.

Show me a racial preoccupation troll of any race or stripe and I'll show you a do nothing loser wasting their lives.

Anthropology courses should be a requirement starting in elementary school. Rounding out my undergrad degree with cultural sociology, political science and anthropology courses has lifted any burden of innacurate perceptions re: the human being. This one of the core reasons for my successes in life. These issues that plague racist, ignorant scum I've put to bed long ago. Our actions reveal our thoughts and emotions. Energies are spent on personal endeavors not competing, envying and hating others different than myself.

You should try it some time.

R123 R124 no need to board an aircraft to Europe to escape the crazy religious crap in the US. The religious aspect really has its roots in pure American capitalism. Since the government never really had the populations back like Norway, Sweden and now Canada the burden lies on the citizenry to pick up the slack and there's no greater solution to this problem like houses of worship.

If you find yourself in dire straits and your national family and bio family don't have your back, just walk your ass into a church. Especially any church of a Protestant denomination (US is majority Protestant) and you will find yourself safe and warm in your community's arms.

Need a break from this whole religious rigmarole? Destination: Quebec

Continuing on from R115 because the white envying racial preoccupation knows better than to lock horns with yours truly here. Tried to change the subject to cuisine. When that didn't work on it goes to religion. Of course never factoring in that american blacks and whites are the religious majority in America.

Keep your race baiting black ass off of my favorite DL community website or you'll find yourself at the bottom of the deep end of this pool.

[quote] The Belgians are the original racists. They did far worse things to the Congolese than even Hitler did to the Jews. And their King during WWII didn't leave and form a government in exile but cooperated with the Nazis. Belgians always get off, but they are evil.

It's like debating coke and Pepsi. All white people are racist.

I had Belgian cock once. Forgot to ask if it was Flemish or Walloon. But damn it was fine. Uncut and a gold bush. The ass was even better..

R128 = Ashleigh Shackelford

Other people have racism too r130 but it rests on other social differentiation and stratification concepts such as Middle Kingdom for China or caste for India. Eiropeans, i.e. whites, only have racism.

Both those imperial countries each have more nations, area, and population than Europe.

r72: your English is very good.

Belgium didn't have a government for many years

R133, I think it was nearer a year and a half, but it just goes to show how well the country's institutions work that it needed no central government, and this despite the fact that the country has Walloon-Flemish divisions. The Belgian economy did excellently during this period.

There was a caretaker government for routine business but it had no real policy- or legislative-making powers.

The period of non-government was ended with the appointment of Elio di Rupo as prime minister, a gay man of Italian descent with a penchant for bowties...

R46 What about "The Singing Nun", one of only 7 artists ever to top the Billboard Hot 100 chart in a foreign language song?! She later left the convent and killed herself along with her lesbian lover.

Gotye (another one who's had a #1 hit in the US) was also born in Belgium but grew up in Australia.

Kate Ryan (aka Katrien Verbeeck) was also hugely popular across Europe in the 00s (it was impossible to go to a club anywhere and not hear her songs being played) but she seems to have disappeared in the last few years. A collective gasp of stunned Eurogays could be heard across the old continent when she failed to qualify for the Eurovision 2006 final.

I've been told that Belgium exists to prevent the Dutch and the French from killing each other.

So we can have beautiful blue eyed, pale boys.

R114 thanks!

Just to piss off OP!

"Dom-i-NEEKA-NEEKA-NEEKA, nee-nee-NEE-nee-nee-nee-nee . . ."