Why Is Arthur Miller hated and blamed for Marilyn Monroe's craziness?!

I don't think the worse of him for giving up on Monroe. She was a nightmare to live with at that point.

I do think the worse of him for refusing to take his newborn son, Daniel Miller, home in 1966, despite his wife's pleas, because the baby had Down Syndrome. He insisted that the baby be institutionalized for life and kept his existence a secret as much as he could. I understand that he never visited his son although his wife (Inge Morath) visited faithfully until she died.

R1 His action with his son was Really BAD , no doubt about that. But People usually don't hate him for that, they hate him because some distorted ideas of him mistreating Marilyn which is absolutely not true.

Had he NOT published "After the Fall," about his relationship with Monroe, he wouldn't be considered such a bastard. Her personal struggles shouldn't have been played out on the stage so that Miller could rid himself of his demons. Monroe paid for their living expenses their entire marriage. Gave him the Roxbury CT house which she remodeled and while difficult, wasn't the shrew portrayed. Miller even made her dissolve her most successful partnership with Milton Greene due to jealousy. Most of Marilyn's circle considered him a freeloader.

People have a tendency in American culture to infantilize good looking women and make excuses for them, particularly if they are blonde /waspy looking. Marilyn had massive mental problems that Arthur Miller was not responsible for and would not have been able to solve. In addition, the myth of "tragic abused Marilyn who just wanted to be loved " is very widespread. The reality is that many of these old Hollywood ingenues had rough early lives and at least made attempts to lead stable lives. Marilyn's circumstances were not as unique as people might imagine.

Miller is NOT hated. He is one of the most beloved playwrights of all time.

I'm fascinated by old Hollywood but have never understood the obsession with Marilyn. There were so many intriguing, beautiful actresses of the early to late 1960s (although Monroe's heyday was a bit earlier ). And yet every week we still see articles or books about her. I would rather read about someone like Jane Birkin for example. I'm sick of hearing about Monroe.

OP, where are you getting the information that Miller is hated for anything, whether or not MM related? I think you may be mistaken.

There is a documentary on HBO about him right now called "Arthur Miller, Writer" that I suggest you check out. It has some of the answers to these questions.

Whether you admire Miller's plays or not (I don't), it's hard to deny that he is probably among the least hated of American writers and is not blamed for Monroe's craziness.

As always, Norman Mailer was an idiosyncratic exception:

"Miller and I knew each other a bit. We'd actually had lived in the same brownstone house, when he was writing Death of a Salesman and I was writing The Naked and the Dead. ... [W]e didn't really take to each other enormously, we'd each walk upstairs afterward thinking, that other guy is never going to amount to much, and both of us were wrong.

But the point is, when they moved to the country, five miles away, I just assumed that there'd be an invitation from Arthur to come over for dinner. And ... for a year, some of my friends were invited, we never were. And I never forgave Arthur for that. And what was my motivation? I wanted to meet [Marilyn Monroe] so I could steal her. Steal her from her husband. And you know a criminal will never forgive you for preventing them from committing the crime that is really in their heart."

R9 Norman Mailer is/was such a cry baby. This post doesn't make me like Arthur Miller any less.

Oh man, have you ever SEEN "After the Fall"? Insufferable. The whining, self-pity, and narcissism.....Yes, Marilyn by then was pretty crazy, but she was also cagey enough to realize that he had written a shitty script for her in "The Misfits" and was using her to revive his flagging career.

R10 The post wasn't intended to make you or anyone like Arthur Miller less.

People who think about Arthur Miller enough to hate him are not giving much thought to his treatment of Monroe.

His treatment of Barbara Loden, his son Daniel, other family members, along with his pompous, self-important posturing are more than enough reason to dislike him.

I am a big fan of his writing, but came to it very late because he was such an ass to deal with.

He's not.

OP is just the Shit-Stirring of Innocents Troll.

No one knows what went on between them except the couple themselves.

What did she see in him. He was fug.

I enjoyed Shelley Winters's autobiographies and her stories of being an early roommate with Marilyn. Those were wild and crazy times. I'm sure Marilyn's emotional problems came in part from being abandoned by her parents and living in foster care. That, and being so beautiful and vulnerable to exploitation and coming of age before women's' liberation were obstacles difficult to overcome. I wish she had a chance to have had a longer life and the opportunity for personal empowerment that post 1960s women were able to experience.

r16, you are a moron.

He rarely talked about Marilyn after the divorce.

Probably smart. Was it a case of if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all? He didn't go the funeral, which might have been perceived as cold, but DiMaggio was a nut job who totally controlled who went to that funeral, so he might not have been welcome.

I think in the long run, because he had so little to say about her that people just filled up the space with conjecture and speculation and that inevitably ends up having a negative tone.

He married her because he was a Writer- and in those days that meant QUEER!

and another moron weighs in.

he has this reputation as a saint when in reality he was a pompous ass and not all that talented. If you want to know the real arthur miller google the 4th kid he had with his last wife that he stuffed away in an institution the poor kids whole life. That is arthur miller. He barely treated his other 3 normal kids any better. Marilyn use to berate him all the time for being a shitty father. Arthur miller was not the nicest guy in the world

R22 lol if she was concerned about his kids, she would not have wanted him to divorce his wife. I agree with your view of Miller, but Marilyn was no better.

OP, are you the guy who starts all these thread about actresses from old Hollywood being vile cunts to the men in their lives?

What is your damage?

He used her, like everyone else.

[quote] [R16], you are a moron.

How so? She married an ugly guy, a writer she had to support and who mistreated his children from previous wives. I think Marilyn was the moron.

Very true that he used her and her tried, at the start, to make MM believe he was writing a wonderful drama for her (The Misfits) but in actuality she saw it as a thinly veiled attack on her and many of the lines her character spoke were things she'd said in real life.

Oh and he was paid a fortune for "his gift to his wife".

There's a telling story from one of her pals who bumped into MM picking up her own birthday cake on her birthday in the late 50s. He wasn't bothered. The maid who wrote a book on MM (if she can be believed at all) wrote how cold he was with her and how she spent her days isolated in her bedroom.

He also married his third wife very soon after ending with MM.

She should have settled down with Joe

She should have settled down with Joe Dimaggio. Her fame was too much for Joe but I think he loved her and would have taken care of her. But she couldn’t walk away from her fame and Hollywood.

Here's how so, r16/r26: you reduced everything to your opinion that Miller was unattractive and thus, what? Not worthy? These were two complicated people, and I imagine you know nothing at all about either of them.

For the record, he had only two children with his first wife. The other two were his children with Inge Morath.

I don't think she should have gone back to DiMaggio. He wanted to put her in a box. He wanted her to live her life according to his old fashioned rules. He never got remarried. I think it was because he was a jerk. I don't think he had a great relationship with his son either.

DiMaggio pretty much ended it with MM after he saw her filming the famous scene in "The Seven Year Itch" where her dress was blown by the subway vents up revealing her legs and underwear. He was a pretty traditional guy and couldn't reconcile sharing his wife with the public that way. But he apparently loved her and sent flowers pretty regularly to her grave -- at least on the anniversary of her death.

A jealous DiMaggio assaulted Monroe over the "Seven-Year Itch" photoshoot and Miller (a very overrated writer in my opinion) married Monroe for his ego and the fame of it, and she married him because she needed intellectual daddy figures in her life, who included Lee Strasberg.

Monroe showed up for a photo shoot with Phillipe Halsman just hours after filming the grate scene from "Itch". Wearing a spaghetti strapped tight dress, she proceeded to strike several poses as well as jumping in place for a series the photographer was working on. No bruising was noticed and her energy level nor emotional state was not that of a recent assault victim.

The story of bruises and abuse come from unnamed film crew members and Amy Greene, former wife of Marilyn's former business partner. No one else.

Yes, Miller was a dreadful human being and not a great writer, but when I think about that marriage I'm sorrier for him that for her. Marilyn was batshit at that point in her life.

As for DiMaggio, there's no way in hell he could have stuck it out, and neither could any other human male. There has never been a straight man who could put up with her desperate neediness, her breakdowns, her fame, her affairs, her substance abuse, etc., and if some alien had come from a planet of universal love and loved her the way she wanted to be loved and tolerated her behavior... it wouldn't have fixed her. Lots of mentally ill people think that all they need to be well is love and forgiveness, but that isn't true. Love and forgive a mentally ill person, and they'll keep right on being ill until you're sucked dry and have to run for your life.

Sounds even more like a cad. You don't know anything more about them than me or anyone else. Yes, people are complicated, Einstein.

ignorant.

From what I’ve read, she was wearing see-through underwear during that Seven Year Itch scene and that’s why DiMaggio was so infuriated. She knew it and continued with it, refusing to change to a more discreet panty after it was pointed out the lights made her underwear transparent.

Ill add a few addl comments. Marilyn hesitated greatly before marrying Miller and at the last minute almost called it off. SHe didnt like the fact she would break up his family but it was Miller s choice. He married her for her money and to escape the wrath of the mccarthy hearings. He knew nothing would happen to him as MM husband. Marilyn paid his alimony, bought him a larger farm in Conn, remodelled his house, paid all the expenses in NY. put up with his bullshit.

Dimaggio didnt divorce Marilyn, she booted his ass out the second time he hit her. SHe told him after the first time if he ever did it again he was out............he moped around about it the rest of his life. He made no attempt in the marriage. He wanted a wife at home in an apron making him lasagne while he went out hung out with his male cronies all hrs. He was actually married only a few years in a very long life. He was a horrible father and not much of a human being. His one weakness was Marilyn Monroe and that was probably because he wasnt number one on her agenda and she was a challenge.

Marilyn was wearing 2 pairs of underwear in the shoot for the seven year itch in the skirt blowing scene. SHe did the risque publicity as she wanted a hit movie, it had nothing to do with her personal morals. Her only ambition in life was to be the biggest star in the world for as many years as possible. She achieved her ambtion as no other star ever did.

There was a good bit of info written about Miller that I think paints an accurate picture of him in the book.... dropping names. The authors conclusion about Marilyn was that Arthur miller had finally met his match in Marilyn Monroe and she gave as good as she got.

The main reason she married him is she wanted a stable relationship and a family and she misjudged Miller. She stayed married to him as long as she did for one reason..........she didnt want the press saying she couldnt keep a husband.............it was a complicated marriage. Ill also comment that Marilyn cared nothing about a mans looks at all. As matter of fact she felt handsome men were unappealing as mates and generally weak human beings if that was their main claim to fame.

Well of course Marilyn wouldn't marry for looks or sex!

Overwhelming emotional needs aside, she was in the rare position of always having so much dick on offer that she could get tired of it. And that's something a Datalounger can only dream about...

Some of the people in the Misfits who shared the hotel with Marilyn and Miller reported that Miller was beating her up almost nightly and some of the dramas of her not being on the set were because Marilyn was to bruised to be filmed.

R41 BS

I think that's a pretty irresponsible statement, r41. Can you document it?