Any DLers travel/traveled to homophobic countries (past and present)?

Yes, to Russia (St. Petersburg) in 2011 for 3-4 days, with my partner. Didn't have any problems and enjoyed ourselves (The Hermitage, Marinsky Theater, restaurants, a day trip to Tsarskoye Selo) but had no idea that only a couple of years later things would turn so nasty over there.

Hoho, my naive young friend, did you ever stop to consider that the very country you're living in, these United States of America, is actually a homophobic c- [is crushed by a giant anvil]

Yes, I've been to the US, before and after marriage equity.

Belize 4 years ago with my (much younger) partner. It was when being gay was still an offence on their Victorian era statutes. It’s not now but I bet the scene is the same. We stayed in Placencia for 3 months so got to know the local locals well. It’s a lovely place to be and the locals are all very friendly. The younger set - in their 20’s - all took to my partner who hung around with them. I’d bike past them and wave and was known as (it appears) their friend’s friend. It was obvious to anyone who WANTED to see that we were a couple. But I guess they just didn’t want to, at least outwardly. The older set, their parents, were accepting of us and one old dear wanted to buy a new hat and come to our wedding.

Anyway, on the last weekend of our stay, the younger set all decided to go out to an uninhabited island and take my partner with them for a weed & beer day out. We were both fearful they would rape and bury him there. Did I mention Belize has one of the highest murder - and unsolved murder rates in the world? We made our excuses and spent the time safely if somewhat boringly packing instead!

I went to a gay bar in Russia, and it was just so sad and depressing.

I worked in St. Petersburg in 2004-2005. I became friends with an artistic set. Painters, set designers, film makers, dancers (real ones, not strippers), a costume designer for the Mariinsky, and a few choreographers. Of course, there were many gay men In these fields and the rest, like most creatives, were comfortable being around gay people. The assumptions at the time were that Russians knew their dancers and ice skaters and the designers behind their beloved works of theater, etc. were gay. They knew it and didn’t have a big problem with it, but they just didn’t want to talk about it quite yet. Russians needed a little more time before the conversation about gay rights began. There was a real sense of optimism and an expectation of progress based on solidarity with an international gay rights movement. My friends truly thought that Russia would lag behind, but eventually end up like most of the West. So many of them came out to their families, naively emboldened by coming out stories on social media, the making of Brokeback Mountain (seriously). Some were in known relationships, even living together. But there was never any public displays. They mostly avoided gay bars, stayed in, had relatively small, quiet parties. They always went out with females. There were never dates, as far as I could tell. Like a couple going out to dinner or the theater. Always in groups, always with women.

A few months before I returned to the US, I was walking home with a Russian man I’d been hooking up with. It was an early summer, middle of the night, and the little plazas next to each apartment block were full of drunk teenagers and this sort of useless, unemployable, patriotic thug that Russia is full of. This certain type who looked like they’d had broken facial bones heal without medical help, who had a grayish tint to their skin showing serious nutritional deficits and exposure to toxic shit. Lead poisoning is a HUGE problem in Russia and contributes to wide scale cognitive problems, btw. Anyway, this was the scene we walked through as we arrived at my building. Pulling the keys out of my bag I heard “Fucking fags!” I ignored it. The drunks got really quiet and I could sense tension. A couple jumped down from a broken playground thing and started walking towards us just as I unlocked the door to the stairwell. The door locked behind us and we ran upstairs, not knowing if one of them actually lived in the building and would be able to open it. They began beating or kicking the door. It was the scariest feeling in my life, knowing that they’d easily bash our brains in, give us “roses” with the ends of their broken bottles, rape us. I’d really come to see these ubiquitous groups of young Russian males as subhuman and knew they were capable of anything. Anyway, made it upstairs. Unlocked the door to my small, shared hallway, then the steel door to my flat, then the second door. My friend said, “Don’t turn on a light. Don’t go near the window. They’ll be watching and know where you live.” We ended up staying in the whole weekend. I was so paranoid. Those kids hung out in that park almost every night that summer. For the first and only time in my life I had a female friend act like my girlfriend, hold my hand when we came home. She even put her hand inside my shirt to stroke my chest hair in front of them. Such a weird thing I haven’t thought of in so long.

Since leaving Russia, all but two of my Russian friends have set up residence outside of the country. One is in NYC having received asylum status. Before his mother died, she told him that if he ever came back to Russia, his uncle would kill him. Lovely woman.

So many memories have come flooding back. One last thing and I’ll stop posting.

One of my friends was beaten beyond recognition by the group of thugs that hung out in the plaza of his mom’s apartment building. He knew exactly who they were. He also new that there were people watching it happen from the building, people he’d known most of his life, and no one did anything to stop it. I asked him why he didn’t report the attackers to the police. He laughed, said, “Because I don’t want to get beaten again.” He meant by the cops, in case that’s not clear. It’s the perfect Russian story.

R6 / R7 wow that's really sad. Thank you for sharing though. Glad you made it out OK.

Just respect the culture, wherever you go. It's not all about you.

Got by fine all over Africa, the Middle East, Russia, China, Japan, India, even Jamaica.

This R9

I had the strangest experience. I went on a solo trip from Vietnam through to Russia. The first woman I met a my Chinese hostel was a lesbian who had fallen in love with a Swiss traveller. I spent my few days with her, touring around. I am not butch looking at all, but she seemed very drawn to me.

When I arrived in Russia the first English speaker at my hostel was a Russian lesbian who I ended up sleeping with for the whole trip. Again, how did she know? It sort of just came out(!) after a few hours of talking.

It was weird. I got more action in those two countries than I had for ages previously.

When I lived in Korea I was told 'there are no Korean gays.' But they have been infected by that nasty strain of fundamentalist christianity.

I almost invariably have sex with locals whenever I travel. Best way to experience the culture. Sex is the best souvenir - as long as it isn't crabs.

R12 which cultures did you have the most memorable sex when visiting?

R14 England by far. Then Morocco, France, Holland, Thailand and India in that order.

Thanks r12 I can attest to England and France. Will go for Thailand next. Tell me about Morocco, isn’t that a homophobic culture? How did it work?

I had dinner in South Boston once. The waiter at the “no name” seafood restaurant spilt an entire bowl of fish slop on me. I wanted to leave without paying but my partner paid, and I think he even tipped, the dip shit.

I've been to Bermuda before and it was the worst experience I have ever had. Not only is it the only place where I was discriminated against for being gay in terms of denying service, but the kinds of cold stares and mistreatment I and other gay people got there was absolutely astonishing to me. This was before the repeal of marriage equality so I have high doubts that it has gotten better since then. If anything, it's probably worse now than ever before.

I’ve never been to Texas. I hear everything is bigger there.

Another one for Russia. I spend a few months there, mostly in Moscow. I was staying at a high end hotel, and would use the gym and steam room. There were really good looking Russian guys in there all the time, and they were flirty. I never ever tried a thing, because I did not know if they were plants or spies, or just good looking closeted travelers. It wasn't worth finding out, because, when you're there, you really get a sense that you can disappear and never be heard from again.

From the news I’ve heard, I’m pretty sure that Carter Page was caught in a honey trap. It’s one of those things that I bet everybody in the news knows, but they don’t quite have the solid sources in order to report it. Like the Trump dossier before it was publicized.

R16 I got cruised by a handsome young Moroccan in the Jama al Fnah square in Marrakech. He quite boldly fell in step with me, chatted me up, and proceeded to invite me home - where he threw his brother out of the room after his mom served us tea and proceeded to start making out. The next two wonderful days were more private in my hotel.

Hang out with locals, have sex - everyone likes sex - and see the country beyond the tourist beat. It's the best way - my way anyway.

Gay sex is everywhere really in Morocco as in all countries I've been to. Maybe I just come across as approachable?

And here's the thing about where I've been in the Middle East and Asia in my experience: what happens behind closed doors is private and everyone respects that and no one intrudes - even family.

People are quite liberal in Morocco. I saw an older married couple holding hands as they walked together, the wife with no hijab, the husband in blue jeans and a traditional Moroccan shirt. Lots of great fun mixed-sex parties. I didn't get invited to any the famous gay parties of French designers like Gaultier and other expats who have homes there. Frankly, I don't think I'd have enjoyed them as much.

The king is known to be gay though married now and it seems no big deal from what I heard around me. His grandfather is even more respected, having saved the Jews in his kingdom. He refused to turn them over to Vichy France during WW2 saying they were his subjects too. I'm told Moroccan Jews now in Israel display his photograph in their home even today. It's a most civilized and cultured country I found. Jews still serve in high positions in government. Charming country.