Let's be Brokeback Mountain

I’m the rose. I get stemmed.

I'm Jakey getting plowed.

I'm the tears shed by Alma after she sees Jack and Ennis kissing.

I'm the beans they are always eating---and the stench they create in that moldy old canvas tent.

I'm annoying brat Alma Jr.

I'll be the passion in the kisses they shared. Reminds me so much of my 1st lover..damn hot.

I'll be the complete lack of preparation the first time they had sex.

Are we thinking pinky cock or gaping hole?

I'm the thing that ruins this movie.

I'm Alma's neglected pussy.

I'm Jack's sore bumhole.

I’m the dead body with the penis torn off.

I'm the penis with the dead body torn off.

I'm the shirt hanging in the closet

I'm Going to Mexico, code word for gay sex...never...even in El Paso.

I'm the Basque shepherder who has found a way to make all this pay while the Anglos go broke.

I'm Ennis's lack of knowledge on how to quit Jack.

I'm the sad, wise, exultant guitar, refrain after refrain.

I'm the fireworks at the fair. I am both literal and metaphorical.

I’m Jake’s nude stand in. Heath was game to show it all but Jake was a scarcely cat. Years later we are still waiting to see the goods. I guess we will never.

I'm the wafer thin E. Annie Proulx novella that inspired the blockbuster Brokedick Mountain.

I’m the handful of words these two lovebirds say to each other throughout the whole movie.

I'm the faintest smoke and mountain sage and salty sweet stink of Jack but there was no real scent, only the memory of it.

I forgot about the r11 r12 part. Now I'm the DL poster who hates the movie even more.

[quote]I’m Jake’s nude stand in. Heath was game to show it all but Jake was a scarcely cat. Years later we are still waiting to see the goods. I guess we will never.

I remember reading somewhere years ago, Jake talking about how he intended never to "show the dick" in any movie he was in. I don't remember where, but it was probably around the time of the Arena Plus Homme photo spread.

Jake in Arena Homme +

Did this pic make it into the magazine? It's from that shoot.

I am the deafening somber silence of the audience at the end of the movie.

I’m Moonlight I’m a much lesser film and the filmmakers won’t even acknowledge it as a gay film. Still I won the Best Picture Oscar. Meanwhile Brokeback was beat by Crash. Did you hear me ?

Fucking (((((((((( CRASH )))))))))) !!!

I'm Lureen's asshole father who wishes his little princess didn't marry that failed bullrider Jack.

I am every tear shed and every heart broken, the fear and frustration...

I´m Anne Hathaway and I deserve an Oscar.

I'm Jake's hole. Either I've been pre-lubing for 30 minutes, or I've been really stretched out or Heath has a microscopic peen because there is no way that that sex scene could happen as it was portrayed on screen.

Did any of Crash's characters get beaten to death with a tire iron or, if r11 and r12 aren't making shit up, have his dick cut off?

I don’t get it The gay bashed old man was supposed to show why zen is was so afraid of being openly gay.

No, r33. But Sandra Bullock did hug her Hispanic maid thus making the world a better place.

R32. You forgot the spit.

"Zen," r34?

I am Jack Nasty!

I'm Linda Cardellini, girls don't fall in love with fun!

Shame she didn't have a bigger career, too.

I'm Randy Quaid. People forget I was in the movie. It was the last movie I did before I went absolutely batshit crazy. This movie drove me to make that sex tape where I have sex with my wife in front of the dog.

[quote]Shame she didn't have a bigger career, too.

She had Jason Segel's big dick in her. She had sufficient.

I'm Annie Proulx. The whole story came out of my sex starved brain because I walked into a bar and saw two cowboys sitting at the bar together and of course, being the frau that I am, just assumed it was a gay relationship.

I’m not Jack Twist.

I’m Jack NASTY!

I wish I could watch it again, just for fact-checking purposes, but I can't. I just can't.

FWIW, I was only able to rewatch the scenes in Crash with Matt Dillon, Ryan Phillippe, or Loretta Devine.

I'm the dead sheep that got ripped open by wolves while those guys were busy screwing around.

r13 You hit the nail on the head, that scene MADE the movie. Also, the one prior to it when Ennis is talking to the parents. The father was a shit, but mom knew and was sympathetic.

I’m the ex-boyfriend of Alma jr that Ennis is so curious about. We meet again at Alma’s wedding. Well one thing leads to another. I go back to his trailer and he fucks the hell out of me. Eventually we move to outside Dallas and open a Bed and Breakfast. He forgets all about a jack and I give his shirt to Goodwill.

Whose dick got cut off?

One of the old gays lovers that zen is is talking about.

Who is "zen"?

[quote]I'm Annie Proulx. The whole story came out of my sex starved brain because I walked into a bar and saw two cowboys sitting at the bar together and of course, being the frau that I am, just assumed it was a gay relationship.

lol. I remember those interviews of Proulx bitching about all the fan fiction that was sent to her. To be fair some of the fan fiction that I read online was awful. I remember a AU type fanfic where Jack didn't die, but left Lureen and the son. Years later finds out he has AIDS and the son tracks him down as Lureen also has AIDS is dying. It was so melodramatic and it was taken down off fanfiction.net quickly.

I'm the hideous smock that Alma wears at her grocery store job.

I'm an elderly Tony Curtis, publicly excoriating the film even though I will admit before I die I have been fucked by many men.

I’m king i’ the roooooad

I am the initial earthquake that broke the mountains back which created the movie. I am the alpha of the movie.

I'm the incessant guitar strumming.

When I type Ennis somehow autocorrects to zen. Just now it changed to Dennis.

Maybe Dennis will appear in the sequel. He will be a new Character. He is great Irish lover.

“I can’t quit you, zen.”

I'm fangurl art.

I'm Alma, and no.... not every bride is beautiful.

I'm what's-his-face, Jake's married fuckbuddy.

I'm borderline sexy Rodeo Clown, rejecting Jake's advances.

I am the cow dung on Jakes left boot.

I'm the over-the-top acting by Michelle Williams and Anne Hathaway. We ruined the movie.

I'm the horrible sideburns.

I’m a lie. Whenever Ennis calls to find out what happened to Jack whose wife lies about how he died. We will never know the reason why.

Or what really happened.

I'm the fundie people of Wyoming who weren't amused that Brokeback Mountain was set in their state.

I'm the married, straight, Chinese director directing a cast of straight actors in a movie that includes a scene of two American cowboys fucking.

I want to see that married fuckbuddy nail jack nasty in his boss’s Cabin.

I’m a hunch. I have a hunch if Jake really is gay he probably fell in love with Heath. Who wouldn’t ? That is most likely why he didn’t comment on his death like any other movie costar would. He was too upset.

R70 this is the second gay movie Ang Lee has done.

But the first one was about Chinese people.

Maybe the butt fucking scene wasn’t totally realistic I don’t think anyone faults Lee’s direction. I have read that Jake and Heath didn’t think he was supportive enough.

I'm Alma's distracting lisp.

Sadly, I am not an acting choice.

[quote]When I type Ennis somehow autocorrects to zen.

Why I turn autocorrect off the minute I get a new device.

I'm the uncut dick-cheese that was all the lube necessary!

I'm the casting director who was smart enough to cast two real life homosexuals in the leads!

I'm the million dollar lawsuit that Randy Quaid lost.

I'm the most needed.

I'm Alma's latest gay husband.

I'm one of the countless gay men who grew up closeted in rural America, working our families' land, playing high school football, marrying young, fathering children. I didn't leave for the big city like my more flamboyant brethren, so I had to drive 100 miles to the nearest theater or else wait for the wife to go to sleep before turning on HBO and seeing myself depicted accurately onscreen for the first time.

I'm the Thanksgiving dinner's scene at Jack's house.

R83 types r83.

I'm the heartbreaking tears streaming down Jack's face as he leaves brokeback mountain, looking at Ennis in his rearview mirror

I'm the fish that Ennis never brought from his fishing trips.

I'm the purse that Alma clutches after she catches Ennis necking with Jack Nasty.

I'm the most words that Ennis has spoken in a year.

I'd hardly consider that drawing at R60 a tribute.

Is it true Damon passed on one of the lead roles? And which one if true?

I'm Jack's father-in-law, who isn't going to take that kind of shit from a faggot like that. I will bide my time and then bash his brains in myself.

R91, I'm Matt Damon and I passed on playing Ennis because I'd already done a gay movie (The Talented Mr. Ripley) and a cowboy movie (Rounders). I'm not too bright. Other actors who got cold feet or were turned down are Joaquin Phoenix, Josh Hartnett, Mark Wahlberg, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Colin Farrell and Billy Crudup.

I'm Lashawn and I have no idea why my husband is at his boss's cabin on most weekends.

"I'm Jake's hole. Either I've been pre-lubing for 30 minutes, or I've been really stretched out"

I'm a loose screw who knows thing or two about Brokeback Mounting.

I'm Dennis Quaid's brother. Everybody said I played crazy so well in this movie, but I didn't think my character was crazy at all.

I'm the fishing pole that never got used.

I'm Lureen's tacky country inspired office outfit. The outfit was used to show how Lureen wasn't poor like Alma who worked at a grocery store wearing a smock.

I'm Ennis' chewing tobacco that has other 'dipping' properties.

I'm the kid eagerly waiting for her father to pick her up at her mother's house, only to see him arrive with his new girlfriend in the car.

:-( I liked that Jack guy better.

I am the viewer who thought that the entire movie was ridiculously overrated and who rolled his eyes at the gays who became all SJW-ish, gnashing their teeth and wailing (and continuing to do so), because it didn’t get the Best Picture Oscar (and lost to CRASH, no less – a movie with POC in it!).

Like Call Me By Your Name, I’m a beautiful piece of filmmaking that is inexplicably dismissed by contrarians.

I'm hoping R101's rolling eyes roll all the way into permanent blindness.

I'm the smokes in Ennis' shirt that Alma rues for foiling her plot to prevent that night's motel porking.

I'm the final scene's two keepsake shirts, sold for $101,100 on eBay.

I'm Kate O'Mara, as "Alma Jr" (oy).

I'm less famous and apparently far less crazy than my sister, Rooney.

Some people find my scenes at the end with my dad, Ennis, very touching.

I am Jack's closet where Ennis finds the shirts entwined. I am obviously symbolic.

I'm the boots that Jack wore, the only piece of clothing he had on when he bended down by the river, washing his clothes.

I'm Gyllenhall's undouched ass that gets fucked in the tent without any warning or prep. Jack NASTY indeed!

I'm the obvious lack of sexual chemistry between the two male leads.

I'm the sexual chemistry Jake DID have with the guy who played "Randy".

I'm my well-meaning but clueless lesbian (welll, mostly bi-) friend who liked the movie, except for "that rape scene in the tent."

R108 "bended" - Oh, dear.

R112 THAT WAS NOT RAPE.

R112 is right, Jack started the intimate touching....he definitely wanted Ennis. I got the feeling, if jack hadn't made a move........Ennis probably never would have, he was very shy.

The obsession with male douching was decades in the future at that point, r109, undoubtedly waiting to spring from your virgin hiney-hole of a mind in what, the 1990s?

R110, would you have had sexual chemistry with Heath Ledger?

I'm Alma's unappreciative asshole!

I'm Ang Lee who gets disrespected by R73 here and also by Mr Washee Washee at 1.00 in this hilarious battle of wills—

Fudgepack Mountain!

r119 is the fudge.

I'm the frau that took Madysn and Dakota to see this movie because I thought it was the start of a 70s revival of such classics as Born Free and Grizzly Adams.

I'm the goddamn parka.

I’m the truck mirror that Jack shaves at, while eyeballing that stranger behind me.

I'm the electric carving knife. I fill the awkward silence with my nifty buzzing sounds.

I’m the tv that takes a beating while Jack and his asshole father-in-law ruin a special meal.

[quote]I'm less famous and apparently far less crazy than my sister, Rooney.

Oh, shut up big sister. At least I have Oscar nominations. Your movie career tanked lol.

I'm the name Alma. Did you know that I mean "soul" in Spanish?

I´m all the pc straight people who HAD to tell me they´d seen it.