Tips & tricks for the erstwhile Sales Clerk

We like to blast the music and auto spray Axe every five minutes so mommy will buy you whatever you want just to the hell out of here, or have her give junior her credit card so she will just sit on the bench and wait outside and avoid coming in coming in altogether.

I have a shop at the flea market, 10 x10. Great fun. People are there to buy!

I find that dressing like a whore helps to encourage commerce!

Hello, Shopbottom!

OP, you sound like an effeminate Ted Bundy.

What kind of shoes? Mens? Womens? Childrens? What kind of climate are you in?

Have a drawing for a free pedicure or foot massage. Offer to measure people's feet.

R5 lol!

[quote]Tips & tricks for the erstwhile Sales Clerk

Either you don't know what "erstwhile" means or you meant to say "from." Because otherwise it makes no sense.

I like R6’s ideas.

Could you maybe model certain shoes you have in yourself? Provided that you have well-kept feet and look appealing, of course. It’s just another conversation starter if you have a reluctant customer.

R8 is right, you aren’t ‘erstwhile’ just yet, unless you suck that badly.

Better to say ‘current’. Perhaps you meant ‘earnest’?

Sell erstwhile shoes

Lesbian

[quote]Being on the phone means more people walk in to browse as they feel less like they will be scrutinised.

I have to say that for me, this is a big issue when browsing in small shops - the feeling that someone is watching your every move, and waiting to pounce. There have been plenty of times when I've entered a store, felt the scrutiny and left even before I had browsed as much as I wanted. It's just a really uncomfortable sensation. So anything that alleviates it is welcomes by me, and most likely by many others as well.

Also, when it comes to shoes - if you carry wide widths or other special sizes, indicate that in some way near the relevant shoes, or just let the customer know verbally. Anybody outside the typical sizes is usually poorly served by brick-and-mortar stores, so knowing that info upfront could make the difference when it comes to a sale.

Offer free foot massages and foot sniffing.

I wonder how those tricks would work at Nasty Pig.

Offer free palm readings or astrology readings (without telling your boss).

Bump for the adorable anxious gay in sales!

OP reporting for my shift!

It was a hot tourist day yesterday, but I still couldn't get buyers. I even stood outside the shop doors for like two hours, smiling and saying "hi" to passers-by but almost everyone quickly went by and didn't linger. I don't know wtf else I can do to earn my 7 bucks an hour (and I don't get paid if I don't sell).

It's kind of lame, tacky stock in the store btw - all either touristy gear like beach sandals & backpacks or frauey stuff like old lady comfort-shoes and cutesy soaps & raincoats. Also Uggs, ugly mules, uglier flats and some of that fake-Celtic nu-agey jewellery. My boss is a broke old Frau who has to move it all and can't (or won't) buy more current or trendy stuff. So that doesn't help matters much.

It is embarrassing when people try to use big words to make themselves sound "smarter", when they clearly don't even know what it means.

If "youths" are regularly shoplifting or discouraging regular clientele, put Bach on the sound system. The worst that can happen is you draw a better class of shoplifters.

Lmao R20. I only wish for that kind of excitement or stock shifting (especially if said youths were sexy). Instead I get Boomers shuffling in & out boredly and shrugging me off as I try to chirping engage them in conversation and get them interested in shoes. It can be demoralising at times.

I usually play inoffensive lesbian pop over the stereo. Maybe some classical would shift the experience.

^^^forgot to sign off, I'm OP btw.

You know, this might not be all OPs fault.

If the store is downtown or in the middle of nowhere then attracting customers will be hard. Likewise if the weather if shitty where it stands or the surrounding businesses are closed or don’t make money.

Does this store widely advertise, in the right places and to the right people?

So quaint and nostalgic for another time.

Jerk off in the main display window.

"Need to move stock"

Be sure to wear a truss.

If there is a front window, ad an object that moves. Eyes will be drawn to the window/merchandise.

Fondle and caress merchandise as if it’s alive - watch QVC/HSN for demonstrations.

Make the entry of the business appealing - add a pot of fresh flowers, a chalkboard with a positive message, a water bowl for dogs who might be on a walk.

A piece of tissue paper goes a long way. Add one sheet to the shopping bag and it will elevate the customer’s shopping experience making it feel more upscale.

Without putting any pressure on the customer, remind them that for optimal foot health, one should never wear the same pair of shoes two days in a row. This may prompt them to purchase a second pair or look for another style/color.

Be sincere. Smile. Make eye contact. Dress neatly and smell good. Make the customer feel Like it’s yiur honor to serve them.

You've got a shitload of Al Bundys here advising you op.

OP I agree with your soft sell methods. Along those lines, I am intimidated when I see someone standing outside a store saying hi - for the same reason. I want to feel like I’m looking online - discreetly, to my own rhythm without prying eyes. Something eye catching in the window is more effective at drawing me in.

Put whoopee cushions on the seats. Put a fake dog turd just inside and pick it up to show the customer. Then seat the customer in a chair next to which a real dog turd has been placed.

Gently suggest alternative but similar brands or styles to a customer if they aren’t sure. But only one at a time, as too many choices will bewilder a shopper and make them flee the scene.

r22, if your clerkship is "erstwhile," why do you still need "tips & tricks"?

Sounds like the store is obviously musty and old and the stock is from the 70s. She's wasting her money and you're wasting your time.

$7 an hour?

In other words forget it and find another job like fast food.

5/10

Two points for effort (excellent shop bottom tone) and three points for actually reeling some people in. Good work flitting about the thread, encouraging others to do the same.

R34 some of us are just playing the game out of boredom.

OP you haven't given us enough info to really provide help. As a general rule your boss (or someone) needs to establish sales and margin and margin goals. Then categorize inventory and create an open to buy plan. You need to monitor shrinkage. I know we all find it irritating to feel watched in a store but sometimes the reduction in shrink that results from this tactic is worth it. Also a budget lets you know if you can actually staff to the necessary levels to do the hand selling some have recommended. This usually takes more staff and a higher hourly wage. or a wage that includes bonuses for meeting or exceeding sales goals.

But based upon what you have shared I'd say your boss has dug a hole they won't be able to climb out of.

Advertise on a website that caters to the feets fetish crowd. For them, money would be no object.

[quote]It is embarrassing when people try to use big words to make themselves sound "smarter", when they clearly don't even know what it means.

It’s even more embarrassing when the person correcting others doesn’t know how to type one sentence correctly.

[quote] As a general rule your boss (or someone) needs to establish sales and margin and margin goals. Then categorize inventory and create an open to buy plan. You need to monitor shrinkage. I know we all find it irritating to feel watched in a store but sometimes the reduction in shrink that results from this tactic is worth it. Also a budget lets you know if you can actually staff to the necessary levels to do the hand selling some have recommended. This usually takes more staff and a higher hourly wage or a wage that includes bonuses for meeting or exceeding sales goals. But based upon what you have shared I'd say your boss has dug a hole they won't be able to climb out of.

R36 thanks so much for your reply, and taking the time to go into detail and break it all down. Without knowing the jargon I’d say you’re very likely right on all counts. I don’t see that this store is viable at all, and my Boss won’t even let me near the figures to confirm my suspicions. I am the only employee and I’m underpaid/paid late often (as are the power company, the water company, the stockists....), so rest assured this isn’t a longtem option for me. I draft applications to other places when there’s no-one in the store, and I’m really just taking the change she hands me weekly for the summer because jobs are dried up in my Podunk town and I needed a job on my doorstep (I can’t drive and have a big resume gap due to illness). My sales goal is literally “sell over $100 of goods a day, and you get paid” 😂😂 it’s bad, Todd.

That said I’m still interested in all your suggestions and I’d love to learn more about how margins & budgets work for myself. Can you recommend any good resources for newbies to learn this stuff? I can’t afford to go to business school and my Boss is only teaching me what NOT to do. Though even with no knowledge of business I can tell that she needs to clear out her ancient backstock on Craigslist or something and freshen the shop fascia up both online and off, plus get a presence on a fashion sales app.

I find it very useful to approach customers with a megaphone and shout in their ear, "I NEED A SALES COMMISSION, BITCH!"

It really helps the customer participate in my well being, you know?

LOL @ R40

[quote]I don't know wtf else I can do to earn my 7 bucks an hour (and I don't get paid if I don't sell).

Isn't that illegal? I thought employees could only get paid per hour OR by commission, not both (not counting bonuses, that is)?

R38, you are wrong.

Punctuation goes inside quotation marks when it's a PART OF the quotation, or when the punctuation is specific to the sentence it's following.

The sentence you quoted is EXACTLY CORRECT.

Call Marcus Lemonis!

I’ve managed to convince my technophobe boss to plump for an FB account, but she only lets me post pics of the stock twice per day, and won’t pay for adboosting nor let me set up giveaways/promos. I think an Etsy shop or a presence on a fashion app would do wonders but she won’t go for that at all.

I have linked our FB account to local traders and a community notice board. What else can I do, DL?

Another commenter said it and I’ll echo it. I hesitate to enter an empty store because I don’t want to feel the sales staff’s eyes on me. I don’t want the weight of their expectations on me.

Everyone’s different. I know diva people who want sales staff to bow and scrape.

But generally, I think people are attracted to a busy place. Can you get some people in there to make it look busy?

Thanks for your thoughtful comment, R46.

You’re right, footfall is the big issue here. Short of giveaways instore and ‘like & share’ I’m at a loss. I’m the only employee so I can’t go outside and sandwichboard or hustle anyone in with a microphone, and my Boss won’t give an inch on anything else. I don’t even have friends in the customer demo I can ask.

My Boss was talking today about closing the shop and making me redundant about a month sooner than I expected (I was provisionally hired on a verbal promise until August). I wouldn’t care, only I was counting on 6-8 more weeks guaranteed cash to cover my rent (yeah, I’m a dummy but I’m desperate). So I need to find a way to drum up some profit for the next month otherwise I’m dipping into my emergency funds.

^^^forgot to add I’m OP.

Present hole...sell a pair!

Always, ask "Are You Being Served, madam(sir)?" as soon as they arrive in the shop.

You could do an ice cream giveaway and serve the ice cream in shoes, like they did in Israel for the Japanese prime minister. It's always a good idea to show customers the versatility of your products.

This is a great thread, OP. I'm laughing myself silly. First, R27 had some great suggestions but I really laughed at the QVC suggestion. Sometimes I watch it just to marvel at the smarmy hosts. They could take R30's rubber dog turd, caress it and ooh and aah over it's color and make it the most desirable buy ever.

Also, I thought I knew what erstwhile meant but was sadly mistaken. I looked it up and, even though you misused the word, I have now properly expanded my vocabulary. Thank you for that.

I work a few days a month in an antique collective where I have a space to sell vintage items. I find that being friendly and informative about the goods helps. It sounds like your merchandise isn't too inspiring though. Perhaps you can work on some narrative about the products, like "first introduced in Egypt, in 4000 BC, flip flops are still really popular. Ours are vintage from the 1970s." It helps to know every scintillating detail about your product. Don't push, though. Some people will be more receptive than others.

[quote] I even stood outside the shop doors for like two hours, smiling and saying "hi" to passers-by but almost everyone quickly went by and didn't linger.

Do you have a big dick? If so, get some snug-fitting khakis or jeans and make sure your bulge is front and center. That'll get people's attention. (if not, stuff a sock in there)

I'm serious. Years ago I worked in a department store and we had a guy in the shoe department whose tight wool slacks showed off his big dick and the women went crazy for him. He'd stand next to a shoe display and women would stop dead in their tracks to look at the shoes, all the while barely looking at the shoes. They would try on several pairs just to get a look at his junk when he sat on that little stool, and more than once I saw one of them 'accidentally' graze his nutsack with their stocking feet. His client book was the biggest in the department, these gals knew when his day off was and they'd make sure they 'sopped by' only when he was working.

Well I’m a lesbian, R53, but I could always get my breasts out more being as I wear a DD and plenty of old dykes come in.

R52 I always bareass lie about the materials, like “oh it’s Italian import leather blah blah blah”. I feel like shit for doing it but I need to scrape whatever pennies I can from this summer job so I can hop a greyhound out of this town.

How about tarting up the shopfront OP? Don't spend any money of course. Could you rebrand the shoes as "vintage?" There isn't a lot you can do with the owner's attitude. Sounds like she has given up. But give it your best shot and you will learn something about running your own business in the future.

What’s the store name?

Shopbottom Shoes?

OP here, thanks for all the great input so far DL. I’m obviously still putting out feelers for other jobs and I, applying to several trying to score an interview. My batshit Boss keeps cuttin my paycheck in half and calling it an “emergency measure” but I think she’s just money-grubbing. I take pics on my tablet of the shop takings book so I can always go to Citizen’s Advice to rat on her if necessary. I know the writing is on the wall and I’ll probably be out of this job by August but eh, it’s been an experience and I did need the cash injection and the confidence boost. If I can hang on to this gig I would like to, though, as I love having the run of the place to myself with no annoying coworkers. I get to play my own music, eat lunch and take breaks when I want, work on my novel and personal admin when no one is browsing etc.

I have tried my best to clean the place up and I do bullshit customers about the materials/origins/‘vintage styles’ but it doesn’t often take. I am trying to own my part in this situation too, and I realise that I’m being too meek and mild and unassuming in some cases which could be a turn-off. I ask people “do you want to try that? Are you looking for something special?” but they clam up and stutter that they’re “just browsing” and ignore me (it’s England, shoppers here are very nervy and don’t like to be confronted). I have been doing a lot of reading on body language and I try to adjust my posture/stance and hand/feet movements according to how my sales are going and which type of customer I’m talking to. I still get a lot of brush offs, though. How do I cultivate some BDE and make people trust and like me enough to listen to my pitch, but not scare them?

Can a lesbian have BDE?

[quote]Can a lesbian have BDE?

Big Dick Ears?

Sure they can, R58.

Imo BDE is a state-of-mind more than a physical description. Like Prince would say, "it's about that walk...!"

Well, looks like I'm getting a performance review Monday which will consist of hours of that hag breathing down my neck while she makes me harass & bully people who come by her store into handing over $20 for shitty ugly shoes & handbags. It's ruined my weekend thinking about doing this and making me more depressed by the second - this last 48h I've lost sleep, snapped at loved ones, holed myself up unshowered. It's bad, Todd.

How am I going to ace this? While I certainly feel like I do a good enough job selling, it's not good enough for her hardsell 80s bullshit. Do I have to spend an afternoon literally up in people's faces like "try these on, seriously"? I don't know what to say or do, how to stand or how to greet people differently than I am already. Someone help me out please?

Tell them that a member of the Royal Family owns the exact same shoe. If they are older, reference the Queen or Philip.

If that fails, pee on their shoes and they'll have to buy a new pair.

Oh. OP. I hope you get out of there soon. Either you made all of this up or your working for a crazy loon who has turned you in to another crazy loon who is going nuts trying to do the best you can. I imagine you almost like a stalker in the corner of the store, preying on customers with an eager stare as you assess their qualities and ways you can best scam them into buying a pair of crappy shoes.

I like that you're working on a novel while you're at work. Perhaps write biting nice sketches about your hag boss and leave copies of them around for your them to find after you've left.

Good luck to you in your future life.

And thank you R62, for a the laugh.

I feel you OP. Selling items to senior folks is something I can’t get my head around as a clerk. With the rich ones it’s like they want guidance but only a certain amount, and they want to be catered to on this servile level? And they don’t want to give the benefit of the doubt and look at offers even though they walked in.

You seem like a sweet law-abiding person who just wants to do right, and maybe that’s the problem bc this lady you work for does not care about that at all. I’d say just quit and start tricking, but as you’re a grown lesbian maybe not. Could you move back to your hometown in with family temporarily and go to Community College for like a year or something, pick up a trade? That’s a good reason to quit.

Sidewalk sale

Going out of business sale

For some reason, I am finding this thread both funny and endearing. I am a problem solver by nature, OP, and I have put my thinking cap on to find you a solution.

Here you go: I think your only hope of reviving that justifiably moribund business and augmenting your income is to start a side business of your own - dealing drugs from the shop. Not only will you draw customers in, you will become a powerhouse salesman. It isn't hard - the merchandise really sells itself. You're welcome, and good luck.

[quote] I am finding this thread both funny and endearing. I am a problem solver by nature, OP, and I have put my thinking cap on to find you a solution.

....thanks, I think R67? I'm not really seeing the funny side at the moment, but I can appreciate it would be hilariously pathetic if it weren't happening to me. I don't think becoming a pusher will work in a provincial town already taken care of opioidally by a local dispensary on the National Health (this is England), but...

[quote] I hope you get out of there soon. Either you made all of this up or your working for a crazy loon who has turned you in to another crazy loon who is going nuts trying to do the best you can. I imagine you almost like a stalker in the corner of the store.

R63 cheers, I hope so as well given that this awful situation is very much my reality. I do feel an utter creep sidling up to people and pressing them into a corner, but while my Boss is looking my shoulder I'm forced to. On the bright side, I have managed to teach myself how to lightly persuade people to trust me and even sometimes buy cheap rubbish off me happily, a skill which I'm sure will come in handy one day.

I'm looking for an out any way I can, applying for hours to clean my local supermarket and move boxes at my local coffee shop for 15-18 hours a week (out where I am we're low on employment options). I'm also staring a potential tribunal in the face, as my Boss keeps reneging on her promises to give me anything more than £50 notes toward the 900 quid she owes me (months of unpaid wages). I'm drafting a letter to demand she pay me what I'm owed in full (I know the cheap bitch won't even though she could, as she has a rich fatcat DH who drives a brand new Range Rover) and that is my first step just before I report her to the Government. This is going to get fucking ugly unless she coughs up my wages, fires me and closes down the shop (I'm praying for that). I wish I'd never met this woman or taken this shit job but it's too late for regrets now.

I'm going to post the first draft of my letter in a sec - someone take a look at it and offer suggestions? Thanks for the support and even the heckling DL. It's been a tough few months and oddly all of this bullshit helps.

Here's my basic skeleton for the letter/email I want to send her. It's more of a formality so I can show the Ombudsman written evidence that I've tried to reach a compromise and she has denied me.

[quote] Dear BOSS, //I hope this letter finds you well. I am writing to open a dialogue regarding my unpaid wages dating from (April - present) and how best to move forward with remunerating the aforementioned. //As this was a temporary role for me, before taking the position I perhaps incorrectly assumed that my pay might be settled in full on a week-by-week basis. I appreciate that to date you have made efforts to redress the accrued amount however I feel strongly that this is not reducing the debt to a comfortable level, and if left unchecked may grow insurmountable. //I believe the provisional verbal contract we agreed upon ends in September and so I feel this is a matter of increasing urgency that calls for decisive & immediate As I have stated in prior conversations with you via telephone I wish to resolve this matter with no acrimony and with a manageable solution benefitting both parties, and without endangering our good relations. I am happy to reach an agreement about instalment-based payment to resolve this matter equitably and thereby avoid the complication & expense of seeking outside remediation. I welcome any suggestion you may have toward a settlement.//Many thanks and kind regards, MY NAME

How shall I improve?

Steer people toward the stuff you LOVE - you can sell it with enthusiasm. Place it within range of the register so you can reference it easily.

Get to know the regular customers and show them things to their taste.

Also point out things that are good to have on hand for last minute gifts. They might buy it to stow away.

If they really flip for something, point out it might be wise to buy 2, because things don't stay in production forever.

Coupon flyers at hospital, warehouses, and nursing homes - drop a few around cafeterias and skitter away.

These are women investing in their feets.

OP, hope you made it intact to September. Is the problem you have more to do with the sales part or your boss in particular? I've always assumed that some people are born salespeople, and the rest of us have to grit our teeth to list something on eBay. I really wish I could sell too. Here is to your successful remuneration!

If you have freedom with displays, I would spotlight certain shoes/brands that you or other employees like. Something like: "Local Favorites," "This Weeks Top Sellers," "Limited Edition," "Last Available," "Import Section." People are drawn to anything with an emotional pull or human relation.

I learned this works when I worked at a video store and a music store and put my sometimes obscure favorites in an "Employee Picks" section. These products ended up selling as often and as much as the most popular items.

OP's probably graduated from college already.

Thanks for the well-wishes R72, and others.

I am a College grad R74, though my degree is only a BA and nothing special. I’m also still stuck at this place, my alternative job search having turned up nothing yet.

I’m actually in a bit of a pickle now. My Boss threatened to let me go and shut the shop about six weeks ago, to which I said “sure ok” and asked for her to send me a letter detailing the date my backwages would be paid in full. She back-pedalled and then said she wanted to stay in business until New Year, and wouldn’t I stay til then? Now furious and not really thinking carefully, I retaliated that I had a promising if low-paid internship offer that I was thinking of taking close to Hallowe’en. I guess I thought that would either force her hand and get her to either pay me better or fire me, but she did neither and just told me to let her know when I wanted to leave (no offer of severance and demanding that I give her notice). So now I’m stuck lying to her every weekend that I’m still looking for a second job to cover rent for my imaginary “apartment with a friend” I have lined up to take an imaginary internship.

I’d hand in my notice tomorrow, only unemployment was bad for my confidence/mental and physical health and as already mentioned I do not need another resume gap. But I don’t know if I can stomach a Winter and Christmas period in a freezing, dirty shopbuilding (not up to code according to the EPA, btw) taking verbal harassment on the phone from a woman who refuses to pay me except in occasional £100 cheques (I got one yesterday after a month of reneged promises and waiting) and owes me a grand (1k).

I’m stressed just thinking about it. Why oh why won’t the local Starbucks give this lesbian 20hrs a week?

Buuuuuuuump. Anyone got a scheme for lil’ old me?

Since when does the EPA decide if a workplace is up to code?

Here's a tip: Get your own tricks.

Gotcha, R78.

Looks like I’ll probably be out of that job in the New Year anyhow, as the bills on the store creep ever higher. I don’t give a fuck, I just wanna make sure this slippery bitch pays me my money owed.

In the meantime I need to invest in a fan heater and find a way to get this stock on IG. Do Instagram allow for small businesses to advertise their stock or will I need to go to a site like Etsy?

Get a shop dog OP. A dog is the answer to everything.

[quote]Since when does the EPA decide if a workplace is up to code?

...and in the UK, to boot?

I'm sorry OP, but I'm gonna need you to clarify a few things to me (just took my sleepy pill): you have an imaginary internship, an imaginary second job, and an imaginary apartment, have I got that right? That's a lot of balls! In the air.

One word: Poo

I suspect that this woman is

Back to my suspicions....

I believe that your boss has you figured out (you strongly desire something on your resume as to avoid gaps in your resume) and is taking advantage of you. She wants to prolong this situation for as long as it suits her needs. She has already established a pattern - she doesn't pay her bills regularly and she sees your wages as just another bill to pay. When she spoke to you about closing the shop and you mentioned being paid in full, she changed her mind pretty quickly in order to prolong a situation that is clearly to her benefit and at your expense.

Her husband certainly isn't worried about money, driving a fancy SUV. He is not worried about his wife' financial "struggles", nor your inability to pay rent.

I suggest that you end this arrangement as soon as possible. In Ontario we have Legal Aid to help those of limited means. I think you need to find the UK equivalent and pursue your backwages aggressively.

I know that you consider unemployment bad for your confidence and mental health but being cheated of your rightful pay would likely be a terrible blow to your confidence as well. Obviously, the longer you delay, the more serious the consequences will be. Fight the good fight and let your boundaries be known.

As for a gap in your employment history: it is possible to volunteer somewhere and put this experience on your resume. Instead of the title "Employment History", I would use a term like "Relevant Experience" or switch to a skills based resume. There are a number of websites offering advice. I have included one here.

Thank you, R85. That is good sound advice I needed to hear, and I will follow it. I will be giving notice as soon as my own recent bills and expenses/personal debts are settled for this year (another 6 weeks or so). After Christmas Eve I’m gone, whether I have another job or not.

Volunteering is a nice idea too. I’ve steered clear of it after some depressing stints in my teens, but this time around I could pick something more refreshing -I’m thinking nature conservation.

I always start out recommending Summer Rain perfume. It's a hit!

Glad to hear that you'll be extricating yourself from your boss' clutches, OP.

I would contact Legal Aid early next week. There might be a wait involved in getting an appointment. It will also be helpful to be able to act on their advice while still employed. Wouldn't it be sweet to present this woman with your request for renumeration just before the Christmas season starts? You should have more leverage before the holidays as I doubt that she will want to work the store alone during such an important sales time period. You can also look around to see who is hiring seasonal help. Maybe there's a much nicer store that you can work at.

How you word your resignation letter may have ramifications on your case. My friend was pushed out of her job and tried to sue her employer. She happened to spot a memo on someone's desk about how they were going to get rid of her so she left before they could fire her. She took a photocopy of this for her records. Even though she had this proof, the fact that she did not outline her difficulties in her resignation letter made her case more complicated. Her letter was supposed to state her reasons for leaving quite clearly (due to the actions of her supervisor) instead of the general resignation letter she presented them with. Seeking legal advice while you are still employed will avoid such pitfalls.

So OP, it looks like you got your low paying internship after all - in the field of employee's rights and obligations. It will be part time but it will certainly be educational.

Good luck with your greedy boss. You may want to start a blog about your experiences. It will get you writing, help you document the process and help others who may be in similar situations. Oh, one more thing - buy yourself an accordion style folder to take with you to your first appointment. It will keep things organized and show that you mean business.

We'll be rooting for you!

Do let us know how things progress

Greyhound buses and EPA do not relate to the UK. This is not a British poster. Does not read as British at all.

Well, I assure you I am British through & through R89 (English, if you must know). I just tend to use a lot of American expressions because I was raised on television, and because I thought you might all understand my meaning better if I did. But I’ll break out the Twinings & Digestives now, with your permission.

Back to the matter at hand. My backpay is now at 2 grand in total, and I’m in the middle of writing a grievance letter about it which - according The the Citizens’ Advice Burea - will constitute the first step of an appeals process (what follows is either conciliation/agreement which I am hoping for, or mediation followed by court proceedings which I pray does not happen). As mentioned above I’ve already got plenty of evidence that I’ve been grossly underpaid, including digital scans of the takings book for the shop.

What I want to do now is clip aural evidence of my Manager’s accusatory language and inappropriate off-the-clock phone calls/answering messages to me. Anyone know a safe app to DL for that? All the ones I’ve looked at are either scams (take money from your account every time you use/open them, like TapACall) or are so illegal they will install trackers on your iPhone. I just want to save the messages she leaves me and record a call or two from her without her realising, so if needs be (i.e. after reading my letter she still refuses to pay me) I can go to tribunal with my hands full of proof that she’s a lying cow.

EST