Would you fuck Jesus?

My neighbor's gardener is named Jesus and yes, I would fuck him from now til next Tuesday if I had the chance.

If you're referring to the late Mr. Christ, no, I wouldn't fuck him. He's been dead WAY too long for my liking.

Remember, He was black.

Historically accurate Jesus

I saw this movie

Not one of the hairless aryan looking blond ones with the hippie hairdos, but the historically accurate one pictured in R3 could make me rise to the occasion.

Skin color doesn't matter if he's still ripped R2

Would and did.

can you go any lower than this? just wondering.

[quote] can you go any lower than this? just wondering.

Yeah, sex with Muhammad.

R9 oh yeah!

If he looked like OPs guy, Hell yes

You're as low as they come, OP.

The real question is would he F-U ?

Jesus looked nothing like that for one he was brown

More naked Jesus please.

My kind of Jesus…

Middle Eastern guys tend to be hugely hung, so yes.

Has the lord presented?

[quote]Yeah, sex with Muhammad.

Muhammad was an insatiable bottom.

Mary was impregnated by God. What did God look like? Man is in his image.

Kim, honey, most scholars think Mary was impregnated by a Roman soldier.

you'd fuck anything.

[quote]most scholars think Mary was impregnated by a Roman soldier.

You're thinking of Mary Magdalene. That slut had more soldiers in her than the Trojan horse.

Dear Lord in Heaven!

He used us (and abused us!)

OP, it's "How very dare you!" not "How fucking dare you"!

Yes and the 12 apostles are welcome to join in for The Last Orgy.

I would

[quote]Yes and the 12 apostles are welcome to join in for The Last Orgy.

I'm bringing the Jell-O salad!

Is there going to be a baked potato bar at the Last Day Orgy ?

I couldn't find it, but I remember there being a picture of a nude guy (porn star?) fully erect on a cross that was pretty hot.

[quote]Would you fuck Jesus?

I always assumed he was a top.

#bottumzrool

Yes. Oh yes I would

If he looked like this (Jeffrey Hunter, a/k/a "I Was a Teenaged Jesus"), I sure would!

Accurate...

r41 😂😂😂

I've already eaten the body of Christ many times, so yeah, I would.

Jesus was Black y’all

If title of this thread had been "Would you fuck Mohammed", it wouldn't have lasted 11 minutes let alone 11 hours.

This is just for you r45

Right back atcha R46

The blood of Christ, YUMMY!

Jesus was gay, so yes.

I just put a fatwa on you r47.

Here’s another angle of that smokin Jesus at r39

Little peekaboo of the crotch area.

American, land of freedom and equality. Except that some are more equal and free than others. See R50 for details.

I have been on my knees for Jesus so many times that I wonder why you need to ask...

Blasphemous. All of you.

Do I get three wishes if I do?

Congratulations, OP. I can count on one hand the number of things in life (and Datalounge) that have truly offended me. This does the job. And yes, you can call me a frau. And no, I didn't examine/scroll through the rest of the posts here.

Yay, R56! Mission accomplished!

Weird, I’m sorta religious and I’m not offended. I kinda suspect Jesus was bi or gay, anyway. At least that’s what I like to think.

It would closed instantly. Islam is the religion of choice for gays. It’s the violence and brutality against gays (and brown skin) that attracts gays.

[quote]Blasphemous.

Thank you.

r56 Grow up.

R54 has no idea how religion works. You have to be a believer first in order to to be blasphemous. Those outside the faith cannot be be blasphemous to something they don't believe in. It's pretty simple.

I find it funny that the offended delicate flowers think they are “striking back” by posting Mohammed images.

Fuck all organized religion, especially those without a sense of humor (which includes both Xtians and Mussies).

[quote]Xtians and Mussies

Mussies??!!

Yes and put a ring on it, his Dad is rich!

laugh now, burn later.

As long as it was the true Jesus: a nice rosy cheeked & wet-lipped blue eyed blond like the one in my local church. Not some scrawny little Darfur Orphan!

[quote]laugh now, burn later.

Pontificate now, maggots will eat your flesh later.

The kween who did this makeup should have gotten fired

Come into my life...

The “fuck Mussies” part in R63 didn’t seem too confident. That pained him.

Nop. Not my type.

Yes I would. At least we know he was circumcised.

It would be scary having sex with the Son of God, imagine the pressure to perform well

At least when having sex with him, screaming "oh, God, oh, God, oh GOD!" would sound appropriate, for once.

As long as he doesn't get attached. You know the needy type, ucch, always needing to be re-assured that he's loved etc. And of course I would draw the line when he asks me to come home and meet his family.

Never date a guy with a martyr complex.

Who?

As hot as he is, I would never fuck the gardener.

Send him over to my house, then.

No. He's too fucking religious. And he's mutilated.

I wouldn't fuck Jesus with Muhammad's cock.

For R66 (or is it R666?),

with a reminder that even phony Xtians need to capitalize properly.

But you're a woman, aren't you? Or the "only black man on the DL"?

[quote]laugh now, burn later.

Just keep telling yourself that, bitch.

Fuck off, Jesus! Get your own heroin!

Disgusting

Any gay male who was raised Catholic fantasized about this at least once (no disrespect to Jesus)

Isn't this the premise to the Like a Prayer video?