Let's Be Steel Magnolias

I'm the ass end of the armadillo cake.

I’m Fried Green Tomatoes. I’m frequently compared to Steel Magnolias and always come out second best.

I’m the bag of tomatoes from Ouiser’s garden which she sits on in Truvy’s Salon.

I'm Julia Roberts' Academy award nomination just for looking pretty and shaking while holding a glass of orange juice.

I'm Trucy's recipe for Cuppa Cuppa Cuppa.

I’m the horrible short wig on Shelby that looks like it was ordered from the back page of Parade magazine.

I'm the bird that shit on Ouisers face when I got chased out of the Eatenton's tree on Shelby's wedding day using firecrackers

You know, I have never seen this movie, or Fried Green Tomatoes, and don't feel deprived. In fact, somewhat relieved.

I'm Blush....who should never, ever be paired with Bashful, you uncouth cunt.

R9 Blush Pink vs. Bashful Pink

[quote] I’m Fried Green Tomatoes. I’m frequently compared to Steel Magnolias and always come out second best.

Even though the former is the one that has lesbians in it. Or at least it did in the book.

I'm Ann Wedgeworth, I play Aunt Fern and I steal every scene I'm in.

I'm Sammy... I'm so confused, I don't know whether to scratch my watch or wind my butt.

I'm Ruth Rovelene. My life has been an experiment in terror.

I am one horrible hairdo, that looks flammable.

I'm Janice Van Meter. And I do my own hair.

I'm A Tale of Two Kidneys

I'm the nayteevaty made out of sparklers.

I'm the grape or aubergine football uniforms.

We're the nude guys giving Shirley an eyeful.

I'm Arnelle's contact. Nobody move or you might step on me!

I’m the size 8 shoe that Truvy wears, although she usually wears a 6.

I'm the fucking terrible acting from every single one of the "stars." The whole thing is a mess from top to bottom. It's not even good "camp."

I'm the luggage that Claree loves less than Ouiser.

I'm the estrogen-filled, passive agressive stereotypes of Southern women! I'm funny, y'all! I'm just a hoot!

I'm Miss Merry Christmas, and I'm a fucking WHORE.

R23, go back to "Four Weddings and a Funeral."

I'm the beautifully set small city of Natchitoches, Louisiana, where this movie was filmed. It's pronounced Nak-a-dish by the natives, and I can just imagine what kind of Republican backwater hellhole it is to live in.

I'm the obligatory remake with an all black cast.

I'm the T-shirt that reads: "I SLAPPED OUISER BOUDREAUX!!

I'm the two pigs fighting under a blanket.

I'm little hairs and fuzzies.

I’m Dylan McDermott’s FINE ASS

I'm Sammy's Easter Bunny head.

I'm the fun Annelle drinking and smoking

I am the six completely different Southern accents spoken by the main cast.

I'm Shelly's huge (nine brides maids), garish pink wedding that must have cost Drum and M'Lynn at least $50,000.

I'm Annelle's cat's eye glasses which are at least 30 years out of fashion.

I'm Jack Jr., bawling his head off in his cute little Halloween costume.

I'm the production assistant who had to blow up and attach the condoms to the get-a-way car.

I'm the baseball that hit Janice Van Meter's head.It was fabulous. [R28] honey you are so right ,it was hellish.

I am the graveyard in which Sally Field wept for her dead daughter.

I’m the pot of spaghetti sauce (or was it chili?) that boiled down to tar while Shelby was busy croaking.

I'm Ted Bundy, and Ouiser's handwriting looks a lot like mine.

I'm Shelby's coffin, for which Drum and M'Lynn (and Jackson?) spared no expense, covered in pink roses. I'm also the beautiful flowers at her funeral, all pink I assume. The funeral must have cost as much as the wedding.

I'm the old man who just realized this movie turns 30 next year

I am the pronunciation "Eastah BUN-neh"!

I'm the little brat who slaps Ouiser at the end.

I'm the locals hired for the wedding reception scene. We were hired from the local Fred Astaire studio to dance Cajun-style. The least they could have done is provided good hair, makeup and clothing. As it is, we are all hideously dressed and coiffed and look like the local yokels we are.

I'm sweet tea, the House Wine of the South. Has she never heard of the Biltmore Estate?

I'm the farting.

I'm the juice Shelby needs to drink!

I'm Ouiser's mustache than Annelle painfully waxes off.

I'm incorporated like Truvy's salon!

I'm the cake for the baby's birthday on July 3rd.

I'm all the quirky, kooky Southern names: M'Lynn, Clairee, Quiser, Annelle, Truvy, Shelby, Drum, Spud. Aren't we just so doggone cute?

I'm Tommy and Jonathan who got fucked by Jackson's huge dick, when Shelby was in a coma.

I'm all gay men. All gay men have track lightin'. And all gay men are named Mark, Rick, or Steve

R58, did you not read the OP’s post?

Possibly and probably forgot it R59.

[quote]And all gay men are named Mark, Rick, or Steve

I'm the TV movie [italic]Coat of Many Colors[/italic] in which Rick Schroder plays Dolly Parton's father but Dolly herself is nowhere to be found. This also brings full circle Dexter Stuffins queening out over Whitney Houston on [italic]Silver Spoons[/italic], since both singers have the song "I Will Always Love You" in common.

She did R59, and found it clever and wanted to pretend she had remembered it.

Quit making things up R62.

We see you r58

Okay R64. I'm asceered now.

you should be naughty r65!

We're the correctly spelled tattoos on Spud's girlfriend.

Shelby looked like shit after she cut her hair.

To be fair, it is Julia Roberts, R68.

I am the evil that must be destroyed.

I'm laughter through tears, Truvy's favorite emotion.

I am the giant puddle of juice on the floor that Shelby spills during her fit.

We're the naked jocks in the locker room Clairee reports from.

I'm the compact mirror that Ouiser uses to surreptitiously view above naked jocks.

I am the vibrant purple of the football tops that Clairee admires in the locker room full of naked men.

I am Clairee's definition of "color commentator."

I'm Shelby's juice why won't this bitch drink me!?

I haven’t seen this film in years, but R76 prompted me to ask, “Are there any black people in it?”

I’m the candy in Truvy’s cabinet drawer, used for special occasions like Shelby’s diabetic seizures.

I'm Texas. M'Lynn can jog all the way to me and back.

I'm the Magnolias in the tree

I'm the A&P. God invented me for easter egg dye kits.

I'm Annelle's new shoes that need to be broken in.

I’m the small child that Ouiser ran over, putting her in a good mood.

I'm the dip that's on the side of Ouser's mouth when she sees Owen for the first time.

I'm Jonathan Ward and Scott Baio didn't molest me.

I’m the kidney M’Lynn donated to her daughter, which was a waste since Shelby died anyway.

I'm the dishes Drum takes out of the sink before he pees in it.

I'm the nails M'Lynn's ready to spit cause she. can't. call. the. shots.

I’m the nails Shelby has been driving through her veins.

I'm all the cans of beans Drum eats with anything

I’m the coffee that kicked in, making Drum run to the toilet.

I'm the plenty of money Clairee has to buy KPPD Radio.

I'm Grey Icing!

I'm Steve's track lighting

I'm the theater trip to NY that will never happen.

I'm the open bathroom door while Claree either pisses or takes a dump.

I'm the back issues of Southern Hair Annelle mooches off Truvy.

I’m the dedication of the new children’s park

I'm Annelle's ability to do good hair, and I am not affected by her personal tragedy.

I'm the beer in Annelle's frigidaire. I'm a sin against god.

I'm the three minutes of wonderful that Shelby would rather have than a lifetime of nothing special.

I'm Why. I'm what M'Lynn wants to know.

I'm a group of Southern straight women -- we all talk like drag queens.

I'm the big black cock that Annelle secretly loves.

I'm cousin Marshall not-so-secretly getting it from R105.

I'm Ouiser's 40 year old very bad mood.

I'm the bacon Ouiser tosses into her shopping cart thinking it will kill her. 25 years later, science will prove otherwise.

I'm Annelle's contact that pops out.

R109, meet R21.

I'm the wreath of Baby Jesus' Annelle made cleaning out the thrift sales.

R110, shove it where the sun doesn't shine.

We're the chili dogs and cotton candy at the fair.

I'm the one armed paper hanger. I'm busy.

I'm the fish. Shelby and Jackson frightened us when they were doing things while skinny dipping.

I'm Ann Berlin.

I'm Whitey Black. Do I have opposable thumbs? Drum's not sure.

I'm the broken champagne glasses.

I'm the obvious stand in for Julia Roberts during the Jack Jr birthday scene. You never see my face but it's obvious that Julia was not present for filming that day.

I'm Sammy Wayne DeSoto, and I'd rather eat dirt.

I'm Circus of the Stars. We do kidney transplants all the time.

I'm C. Houser and I played Jack Jr. as a 1-year-old. I turned 30 last year.

I am Clairee's luggage: overweight, damaged, cheap and unclaimed.

I'm Ouiser's bench. Get the fuck off me Clairee.

I'm Ouiser's dog and if I needed a kidney, she'd give me one.

[quote]R29 I'm the obligatory remake with an all black cast.

That sounds sooooooooo much more interesting than the original!!

I'm Daryl Hannah, who thinks wearing glasses is acting.

I think you’re a CHAIN, r54.

I'm Spud's competition who owns his own equipment.

I'm the remake starring Julia Roberts who's now old enough to play M'Lynn

I'm Shelby's diabetes that always fucked up her life and slowly helped to kill her.

I am the hairspray mask that Truvy covers her face with while Annelle, valedictorian of the hairdo class, corrects her poofy work.

I'm the jock penises that are exposed to Ouiser -- trying to decide whether to get hard or not.

I'm the hitherto confused young gayling watching the locker room scene and then realizing....

I'm the beautiful Georges Delerue theme music.

[quote] I'm the jock penises that are exposed to Ouiser -- trying to decide whether to get hard or not.

I'm Ray Stark. I put that in for the gay men just like the panties in [italic]Annie[/italic] were for the lesbians. Thanks for making Streisand a star and by proxy making me rich!

I always wondered about that R119.

I'm the freezes beautifully section of Annelle's cookbook.

I'm Lycra. Truvy hasn't left the house without me on her thighs since she was 13.

Because she was brought up right.

I'm Loretta Lynn coming to get a loose meat sandwich at the Christmas fair.

I'm Sam Shepard. What the hell am I doing in THIS movie?

I'm the relieved little chink girl who is very relieved that Shelby died before their China "vacation".

I am Herbert Ross’s ass and I was handed to Herbert by Dolly when he criticizes her acting. Dolly politely reminds Herbert that he was the Director and it was his job to make her appear she was acting, in front of the cast.

I'm my exercises. Shelby could put a LITTLE effort into it.

I'm the Baptist bookstore in Shrievport that got cleaned out of baby Jesuses

Hey douche-cunt OP, remember what you did to my post last night??

Let's all be steel-holes!

Yeah, eat my steel hole OP

OP likes me he really likes me!!

Raw. Revolting. I am definitely gay.

bump

I'm Owen Jenkins. I hardly have any hair anywhere.

I'm M'Lynn's Secret Santa. I'm getting a shitty gift.

I'm the only thing that separates us from the animals

I'm Nurse Pam, the only black person with any lines in this movie.

I'm the horrible wedding singer.

I'm one of the town's sick tickets M'Lynn works with.

I am the HIGH political official Nancy Beth got it on with at the local motel. She stunk, didn't shave, and overall was a lousy lay. Not worth the scandal.

I’m Jack Jr.’s clown costume. My owner has been taught to say “trick or treat” or something... or something like that.

I'm Jackson. I'm one big hangin' man.

I am the big blob of menthol rub in McLaines hankerchief ,that helped her cry in the funeral scene.

I'm Judy. And I quit!

I'm Beaches and I'm better.

[quote]It's pronounced Nak-a-dish

I thought it was Nack-a-tush?

(To stay on topic): I’m the pot of melted eyebrow wax that makes you pretty.

I am the Pepto Bismol reeking layout of pink carpet and pink silk bunting draped over anything that will stand still at the First Presbyterian Church. I will be used up briefly at 2:00, then cast aside soon after.

I'm Dolly and even though I can't act, my performance is the best in the film.

I'm Truvy and I'm an expert beautician but I obviously don't know how to do my own hair because throughout the entire movie I wear what is obviously a Dolly Parton wig.

I am one of three most ungrateful children ever conceived.

I'm two pigs fighting under a blanket!

I am the NOT difficult questions.

I'm windblown!

I am the issue of whether Shelby can get pregnant, the doctor didn't say she couldn't, he said she shouldn't.

R169 meet R31

I am the shrill , hysterical “why whyyyyyy ?” that Sally Feild screams at Shelbys funeral.

I'm Anne Boleyn's six fingers.

...and three breasts.

^^I'm the twelve total.

I'm the nice silverware Truvy'd like to keep.

I'm the lycra that hasn't left Truvy's thighs since she was 13.

I'm the snapping twig that alerts Quiser that Clairee is sneaking up on her.

I'm the color TV that Clairee is too twisted for.

I am one of the many critics who'd get the side-eye from female friends and relatives when I said that the film sucked and was a true nadir of "chick flicks".

R179, are you also R139?

R183 Nope. Was beat to the punch.

I'm the grease Ouser can't get into her diet.

I’m the half-hardened wax Spud plays with while he’s talking to Truvy right before they leave for Shelby’s funeral. I’m fun to play with.

I'm the myths and stereotypes about diabetes which plague this movie and which will needlessly occupy diabetes nonprofits for decades to come.

I'm pink, Shelby's signature color. I'm the color of the suit she was buried in, the one with the little red cherries on the lapel.

I am the hanging part of Jackson who is one hanging man.

I'm the baby Jesuses that Anelle cleaned out the Baptist bookstore in Shreveport.

I’m the cream cheese that Miss Merry Christmas’ family looks like it’s made of. Especially her hot blonde brother. In his case, I’d eat myself.

I'm the tinsel that she had down around her knees

I'm the screen doors everyone slams as rush out. Everyone in this movie is in such a fucking hurry. Calm down, you corn pone idiots. Calm down.

I’m the fried chicken, cooked by good Baptist women

We just love this movie!

I cannot believe there was a day when we actually thought Darryl Hannah was pretty.

It's Nack a tish.

Wow, Sally Fields' house in the movie is a bed and breakfast now. I live in Jackson, MS. It would make a nice weekend getaway. I'll have to check it out and report back. Town looks cute and apparently hasn't changed much since the movie was filmed.

I'm the hair clippings on the salon floor that need to be swept up.

I'm Rhett and I'm about to snap!

I'm the sink that Drum pisses in when he's feeling gentlemanly.

I'm Julia's execrable Southern accent, which is execrable despite her being an Atlanta native.

Ah am tha Eastah BUN-neh.

I'm the lycra that's been on Truuvy's thighs each time she's left the house since she was fourteen.

I'm Poke n Beans. Drum eats em with evrythang.

I'm the Twinkies Ouser's eating right out of the box.

I'm the very bad mood.

I'm Drum's coffee that just kicked in.

I'm Shelby's fat ugly cousin at the reception bored out of my skull. I secretly want another piece of armadilla cake

I'm Julia Robert's head superimposed on someone else's body in the cast photo, so it won't look as though she's two feet taller than Sally Field.

R4 - I'm the glass of orange juice.

I'm a piece of pulp floating on top of the juice. I'm make Shelby want to gag.

I'm the candy in Shelby's purse, which she didn't bring.

I'm the Easter bunny costume that Annelle forced Sammy to wear for the egg hunt.

I’m iced tea, the house wine of the South.

I’m the artwork in Ouiser’s house. The track lighting highlights me.

I'm such a good time - until November.

I'm the Cookie Clarie was going to get.

I'm the Magnolias.

I'm New York Times reporter Maggie Haberman.

[quote]I'm the Magnolias.

Well, then, I'm the steel or somethin'.

r218 did you come out of my tree?? THAT IS MY TREE, I WILl SPEAK TO MELYNNE ABOUT THIS.

I'm truvy's girdle which she never leave home without

I'm holy fuck... they're that old (and all alive) ... Dukakis 86; Maclaine 83; Field, 71; Parton, 72.

I love r6

I’m the hands towels that were used to wipe up the spilled orange juice on the floor.

I'm the snake cake which Aunt Fern can't make because she doesn't have enough counter space.

I am CALORIES, CALORIES!

I’m M’lynn’s hair style, a brown football helmet.

I'm one of the sick tickets in this town.

I'm the ghost of Bobby Harling's one note career.

I'm the toast Drum was going to serve up Weezer's St. Bernard on.

[quote]I'm the ghost of Bobby Harling's one note career.

I'm [italic]Soapdish[/italic], the second and last note in his career.

I'm Ruth Robeline....I'm a twisted, troubled soul. My life has been an experiment in terror. Husband killed in World War II. My son was killed in Vietnam. I have to tell you, when it comes to suffering, I'm right up there with Elizabeth Taylor.

Was Elizabeth Taylor ever asked to read for any of the roles?

I'm the leather vest Sammy wears when he's bartending.

I make him look edgy so Annelle will fall for him.

Bette Davis expressed interest in making the film, before her death. She wanted to play Ouizer, naturally, and have Katharine Hepburn portray Claree, and Elizabeth Taylor for the Truvy role.

That would've been an interesting cast

We’re the brothers who look completely the same at the end of the movie as they do at the beginning. We’re teenagers, y’all, so when does the growth spurt start? No pubes yet, either. Shouldn’t mom and dad take us to the doctor or somethin’? We’re beginning to suspect we’ve got the diabetes too, like sis, but maybe the more the kind Gary Coleman has or that Webster fella.

I'm the black nurse who worked with Shelby and lied and said the Halloween costume she made was cute and I was the only black in a whole film set in the south!

I'm the syringes in Julia's dressing room. Vitamin B shots you know.

[quote]I'm holy fuck... they're that old (and all alive) ... Dukakis 86; Maclaine 83; Field, 71; Parton, 72.

I looked up Tom Skerritt and he's 84. I didn't know he was that old.

I'm the awful pink ascot worn at the wedding.

I’m blush and bashful.

I'm grape or obergine

r244 AUBERGINE. (French or UK English for eggplant.)

I'm the motorcycle that Louie and Sammy ride off at the end.

What an awful film.

R247= Janice Van Meter

Let's not, ok?

I'm the frightened fish

I’m the movie poster in which all of the actresses appeared as themselves (except for Sally who has full on M’Lynn hair and wardrobe).

I'm Dolly Parton. My agent got my name before Shirley MacLaine's on the poster.

I think the credits went by on screen time. Dolly has more time than Shirley. Julia had the least.

I'm the 50 pounds of crab claws, slowly marinating.

Im Dylan McDermott.

I was at the zenith of my beauty in this movie.

[quote] I'm the three minutes of wonderful that Shelby would rather have than a lifetime of nothing special.

And those three minutes resulted in Jackson, Jr., born on the 3rd of July.

I'm the men who fled the house when they knew SM was about to be watched. We've come back, but too early. It's still on.

I’m the birds being shot at

I'm Herb Ross' bitch wife Lee.

At the London premiere I will take the seat reserved for the Princess of Whales . I will then refuse to move.

I will be ushered out.

I'm the poor fish which were scared to death when Shelby and Jackson went skinny dipping. "We did things that frightened fish!"

I'm the Zydeco music being played at the wedding reception.

Well shit, I think you guys just about hit every point in the film. Clarifying for R116 - the reference was to Anne Boelyn and Amber Lynn, the 80s porn star.

I'm cute James Wleck who was also on Ryan's Hope and One Life to Live.

I’m Dolly’s tits, covered up & not a plot point for the first time in her career.

I'm a pack of straight white women who all talk like black drag queens with really bad Southern accents, even the ones who were born there.

I'm the 30 minutes of wonderful that Shelby had with Jackson when they went parking. It made up for her dread of a lifetime of nothing special.

I'm the cleaners that's open on a Sunday. Easter Sunday no less.