do gay men like hanging out with lesbians or nah?

Stupid question, but depends on the lesbian, just like it depends on the straight girl, or the gay guy, or the straight girl.

I don't like hanging out with dumbasses, doesn't matter lezbo, homo, straight, etc.

What is OP even doing on a gay site?

They don't hit on me, I don't hit on them, so that level of awkwardness is eliminated.

But God help you if you disagree with them on ANYTHING.

R3, why in the name of God would you disagree with a lesbian on anything? Love you.

I'm lez and I'm just curious whether you got a preference because the gay men I know only ever seem to have straight women as (best) friends and I wonder why. I mean, I'm familiar with gay hags.. straight women who think it's kind of cool to have a "gay best friend", but why do gay men prefer straight women to lesbians? Are we that annoying?

They are too "low brow" for me as an every day friend not much in common. But great as camping buddies or if you're into SJW stuff

Mae West once commented: "I don't enjoy the company of Lesbians - they are not humorous people"

R5 O/P I don't have a preference either way as to who I hang out with, as long as they're fun.

I never really thought about it, but now that you mention it, I don't seem to have that many opportunities to hang with lesbians. I do have one close friend that's lesbian that I hang out with pretty frequently. But it seems like straight women intentionally seek out gay dudes more than lesbians do?

I only know one or two lesbians. My friends are all gay men. I’ve never had a “hag” and never been interested in having one. Lesbians here seem to be well-hidden for some reason. I think I’d rather be friends with a lesbian than a straight woman. Lesbian history and culture is fascinating.

R8 Definitely, yes. (Many) straight women are obsessed with gay men. (Look at all those straight chicks "shipping" gay male pairings/celebrities.) It makes them feel edgy.. having gay friends.

Thing is, as a lez I do prefer female company, surround myself with women, but I'd also like to have male friends. Straight men, tho, are out of question, because they always end up wanting to have sex with me - no matter how often I tell them I only sleep with women. So it always ends up being at least awkward.. if not awful. But gay men don't seem to wanna hang out with lesbians. So no dudes for me then. :(

Awww, you seem fun O/P. I'd hang out with you, and I promise no matter how hot you are, I won't try to sleep with you! :)

Depends on the lesbian(s). A lot of lesbians seem to me to be more separatist than gay men and a bit less accessible than gay men, particularly the stereotypical lesbians.

lesbians are great to release the tension of being around men. I love men, prefer men, but being around a couple hardcore dykes shooting the shit is easy and relaxing

R11 Hah, thank you. That sounds awesome. I'd love to hang out with men more, but the blatant disrespect from straight men is too damn exhausting for me. I cannot relax around them, because every time I shoot them as much as a smile (or even a blank look) they seem to think it's an invite to come onto me.

I am forever indebted to a lesbian friend who helped me come out of the closet. We spent hours talking while driving from client to client .

Bisexuals don't exist, obviously.

R16 Vegans also. APPARENTLY THEY DONT' EXIST!!!11!!! Or why weren't they mentioned here? Why?!

As a gay man, I love my lesbian sisters. We are family. I will always have your backs. Happy to share bars and other gay/lesbian spaces with you...but I've never had super close lesbian friends. Meanwhile, I've always had straight female friends. Maybe if I lived in a small town, that would be different.

BEWARE the gay man who hangs out primarily with lesbians. Guaranteed batshit crazy. Run, queens, run.

Gay male/lesbian friendships seem surprisingly rare in my experience.

Not to say they don't happen, but you don't see them that often.

R17 Come on, it's obvious OP only imagines women to be either lesbian or straight. Men, perhaps, too, though a bisexual man wouldn't be comfortable to hang out with because he could have sexual interest. But hello, how can we talk about friendship between gay men and women without mentioning bisexual women? They aren't fag hags, because they are queer themselves. Yet the relationship is not entirely sexless because a bi woman can desire her gay male friend.

To be perfectly honest, someone's sexuality/gender is not really important to me. Their personality and interests are what would be the determining factors as to whether we would be friends or not. That said, I'm amazed any woman would want to be friends with someone who would call her a "hag?" Maybe it's a low self esteem thing?

NONE of this is funny. NONE!

all the lesbos in my small town bedhop with each other and fight all the time, so no.

R20 Dude, it was simply not the point of my question. Honestly you're making a huge "bisexual erasure" deal out of fucking nothing. Not to mention that people were more than welcome to put bisexuals in their replies. Plus - I am a lesbian and therefore wanted to know whether gay men like to hang out with lesbians. It ain't more than this, chill.

R21 Straight women aren't aware of being (gay) hags. They think they're being super-duper tolerant allies by using gay men (also women? idk) as edgy add-ons to their life style.

A lot of lesbians I know simply don't interact with men much, gay or otherwise.

Last time I saw a gay man hanging around with a bi woman, she was his bi male friend's girlfriend. They weren't close friends but good buddies.

Nothing has been the same since Michfest went tits up.

Nothing worse than a lesbian approaching you with a clipboard and a sharp pencil! Run.

Ha, R28. I really love when you boys tease us with the Michfest references. It always cracks me up.

Have you ever considered, R25, that a straight woman might be friends with someone who's gay because she actually likes him and enjoys his company? As for straight women not being aware of being called "hags" behind our backs, it's hardly a secret.

What about gay men who deceive women and trap them into miserable (and often violent) sham marriages until they're unceremoniously dumped as single mothers? Is that not "using" someone? That's happened to four women I know, one of which is a family member.

I hung out with more lesbians in college. In NYC, I have very little contact. I don't even see very many in my East Village neighborhood. Straight women seem to be much more accessible. I do like lesbians. I think gay men and straight women are interested in men?

[quote]R1 Stupid question, but depends on the lesbian, just like it depends on the straight girl, or the gay guy, or the straight girl. I don't like hanging out with dumbasses, doesn't matter lezbo, homo, straight, etc.

THIS.

I will say most of my close friends tend to be women. They're just seem more emotionally in touch with themselves, in my experience, and tend to see things from a broader (no pun intended) angle. To me, it's like most men, gay or straight, have a few gears to drive in while women have more.

But I have a lot of naturally feminine characteristics, myself, and have always identified more with women than men. So maybe I'm just more comfortable with my own kind (?) The most "masculine" thing about me is that I can tend to be a slob if I'm not careful.

Underneath it all, I probably have one of those trans chromosome makeups I read about in the novel [italic] Middlesex [/italic] by Jeffrey Eugenides...if that theory's true. Recieved lots and lots of estrogen in the womb, or whatever. (Ring finger and index finger same length, etc.)

I came out as a teenager and I found it easier to make friends with lesbians than other gay men. So, yes, I owe them a huge debt of gratitude there.

I always assumed that gay men and straight women were buds because they had their interest in men as a common factor. Same with lesbians and straight guys being interested in women.

I can't say anything about the first one but the second one is definitely untrue. I have nothing in common with straight men.. also when it comes to the way I'm approaching women and such. Not to mention that I've yet to meet a straight man who doesn't at some point hit on me.

That's interesting, OP. I have a few straight male friends who pal around with lesbians. In fact, my ex boyfriend's wedding was planned by a lesbian couple we worked with.

To answer your question in r5, OP, yes.

And agree w r31, re: r25. We're friends with people we like. It has nothing to do with edgy. Literally nothing.

And not knowing about being called hags? What year do you think this is, sweetie? That term's been around for eons.

R38 Are you a straight woman?

Yes, and I've had a sexless crush on a butch lesbian or two

OP the answer is either yes or no. There is no point in attaching “or nah” to that question. It’s stupid and obnoxious.

I think they're cute, and way more chill than hanging out with other gay guys.

My gay best friend and I (lez)have been friends since we were 14 (we are 34 now) We have a similar sense of humour, similar background. There is no awkwardness, we often get mistaken for siblings. I think it’s about whether personalities click rather than sexuality.

I have had numerous lesbian friends throughout my life. I don't think of them as a separate category of people, except I don't want to have sex with them. Nor they, me. It works out well for me, but overall, it depends on the individual gay guy and lesbian.

I'm w/R40... I have had many close lez friends... Two "besties". I think if you like masculinity, there is a lot to admire about many lesbians. Perhaps better said to include I've always admired and been drawn to strong women in general, but couple that quality w/a masculine air and cute preppy/sporty clothing, they have always seemed very COOL to me. Also wholeheartedly agree w/the bloke who mentioned commom interests.... I.e. Rugby, kayaking, backpacking/camping, love of classic cars, etc... Les gals IMHO, have never come off as superficial and/or catty as many gay men I've known. I do probably possess more straight male close friends than most gay men. Perhaps lesbians find me cooler than most gay men, or find me more interesting too! I find we have more in line regards our taste in music as well.

[quote]What about gay men who deceive women and trap them into miserable (and often violent) sham marriages until they're unceremoniously dumped as single mothers? Is that not "using" someone? That's happened to four women I know, one of which is a family member.

Has this happened to you, Poo Shoes (R21 and R31)? Because you write about it a lot on here. Please share, if so.

When I lived in a smaller city, I had a really diverse bunch of friends. One reason was that there were only a few bars and few catered to a specific crowd. So it was easy to meet the lgbt spectrum. In large cities it seems like the social scene is much more segregated by sub-group.

Depends on the lesbians.

Some of them are the funniest, most relaxed people you'll ever meet on this earth. Some of them are like little kommisars always shutting you down with, "That's not funny."

Like all types of people, some of them fit bad stereotypes, and some are great people.

I'm more likely to hang out with straight women, just because I know so many more of them. But I've also hung out with some really smart, cool Lesbians.

Not especially, no.

We agree with Nan Michiganwomyn that fish should be forbidden by law from having sex with men!

My best friend was a lesbian in high school, although she went to another school. I've had a couple other close lesbian friends. My lesbian friends all have better taste in music than MOST of my gay friends. I agree with R45, I've always been more attracted to masculine women, not sexually, and they've always been attracted to me. It's funny though, I've always had better girl friends than gay friends. Right now, my best girl friends are straight. One bad thing about being friends with straight girls is, sometimes, they treat you like you're their boyfriend and try to pull their relationship bullshit on you. I've had to put a stop to that a few times right away. They have better taste in music, in my opinion. I don't know why I don't hang around many lesbians now though, but I think it's because a lot of the lesbians I've run into lately are full of drama and too depressing to hang around.