It's a Fanny Cradock Christmas!

"Mincemeat is the Cinderella of Christmas cooking."

A lovely omelette with mince will give you the strength to get through a whole day of Christmas cookery!

May all your doughnuts turn out like Fanny's this Christmas.

Terrifying Christmas cakes!

I'm in the US, and have never eaten mincemeat. I have to say, it doesn't look very appetizing. Can anyone describe it, if you enjoy eating it?

No samples of Fanny's pud! Guests get first taste!

When I see her, all I can think about is Glenn Close being cast as Baby Jane Hudson.

MIncemeat in an omelette? Yikes. Might be one reason to use the traditional recipe that actually has meat.

R5 - it's just a mix of nuts, raisins, candied peel,fruit, suet and the various spices you associate with Christmas such as cinammon and nutmeg. And maybe a dash of brandy. Mince pies are delicious - don't let Fanny's put you off.

Am I the only one who read that as "minge"?

Perhaps some of our lady DLers could whip up some of Fanny's batter this Christmas.

My grandmother use to bake these pies at Thanksgiving. Ewwwww.

Traditional mincemeat pies...with a MUCH more pleasant host.

Really, nobody has mentioned her infamous green Duchesse potatoes (tarted up mashed potatoes.)

R9, Thank you! That actually sounds pretty interesting. I might try making it some time. I was confused when she mentioned that the best mince was last year's, but now I think I'm beginning to understand. I'm on of the rare Americans who actually likes fruitcake (they're sort of a standing joke here). I think a slice of fruitcake spread with cream cheese and a mug of strong tea is a wonderful breakfast.

R13 - As Vita Sackville-West once said to her hubby, Harold - "I really do prefer Fanny's."

R15 You're welcome. Do make you're own - you can buy various fancy ones in the UK but the simple ones you make yourself are much much better. I think people who've not had them get put off thinking there's meat in them. Which there was originally - the dried fruit and spices used to cover up less than perfect meat in the lean winter months but over the centuries the meat disappeared and plenty of brown sugar took its place. I'm a Brit but I live in Spain and at this time of the year I really do miss that combination of fruit and spices that's really common in northern European countries. A polvorón (a seasonal cake here that's sort of a combination of lard and talcum powder) is no substitute for a mince pie or a Christmas pudding.

I, too, love it because it's so old-fashioned. Suet is off-putting, so I look for versions without.

Save time to dye, pipe and flute the mashed potatoes to serve with the bird!

R19 Mmmmm

delish

R19. The Irish love potato dishes. I think Fanny's dyed green would make a marvellous treat for St Patrick's Day.

She looks like a drag queen. Do any of the BritGays "do" her?

Weird set. It's like she's cooking in outer space.

And what's with the dressy clothes? I don't trust any cook that overly made-up.

R23, she's been dead since 1994. She retired from cooking in 1987. Anything you see her in is vintage.

Obviously, she's done the buttercream.

R23 - It was part of her schtick. Early on she would do cookery demonstrations at the Royal Albert Hall - Fanny in an evening gown accompanied by husband Johnny in a monocle and tux. It was to appeal to class snobbery and the need for a bit of glamour in the post-war post-empire ration book years in the UK.

R2 - that runny mincemeat omelet gives me the runs just looking at it.

It is time to deal with the Christmas "Pud"

MUGSHOT: She was caught giving handjobs for $$ in her youth

She and her husband (as British people know, of course) represented one of the most ghastly, craven, creepy and utterly watchable acts in the business. The maniacal and desperate quality of her work, the overreaching and tasteless flapdoodle, the arrogance, the condescension (her treatment of a mere contest winner is what ultimately wrecked her career, like the "at long last, have you no decency" moments for Joe McCarthy) - the wicked, savage side of camp.

And, yes, the makeup. God. The clothes. The faux-posh voice. The cruelty to her husband, who had his own secrets. The booziness.

God, I miss Fanny.

Here's the moment she committed career suicide, as her replacement of the contest winner's recipe failed spectacularly for the enormous dinner involved.

Fanny dear's Christmas cakes look like you could ship them without putting them in a box. Slap on a label and some stamps and off to Uncle Bob in Australia.

I don’t know who she is but I think she’s FABULOUS!!! Thanks Miss OP!!!

She was married 4 times,; she was a bigamist. (That is why we love her!)

Her first husband died in a plane crash in 1927.

If American gays are still somewhat baffled as to the allure of Fanny further to R30's spot on assessment, it may add a little something if you know that the word fanny in British English is not a cutesy childish synonym for a derriere but a rather cruder term for a vagina.

She was simply ghastly, UK. Well done.

R33 here commenting on the image on my post.

It looks like Linda Lavin in drag!!

And, of course, the fact that her food was awful! She basically only survived because the British were so desperate for something new after the long years of rationing (which went on until 1954) - which also is a large reason for the poor reputation of British food, as Brits grabbed onto any new trend or gimmick.

Why are British people so bad at decorating Christmas trees?

????

Is there a contest?

These videos are from the mid Seventies - at which point Britain was beset by strikes and shortages. There's something quite sad about the way she's there in her evening gown talking up finding some glace cherries for her Christmas cake like it's a big deal but the truth is, it was.

Yeesh.

Really, Britain?

Is it a requirement for Christmas trees to have lighting haphazardly thrown on by drunks?

I love the British. I love everything about them.

You're doing this on purpose, right?

Beautifully lit.

You're the type of person who just beats a joke into the ground, aren't you? And the saddest part is you've been sat there for 20 minutes of googling to do so.

For unfamiliar Americans:

[italic]The Big Time[/italic] (see clip at R30) was a widely watched early reality show that ran on BBC from 1976 to 1981. The premise was that everyday people with special talents or aspirations were paired with celebrity mentors in their field of endeavor, à la [italic]The Voice.[/italic]

Fanny advised a housewife and aspiring chef named Gwen Troake on a suitable dinner menu to be served to VIPs including nobility and politicians. She condescendingly criticized Troake's menu, to which she responded with gagging noises. The changes she made to the menu made the dinner a disaster, and she quickly became hated by viewers for ruining Troake's big moment.

Well done, Swansea

[quote] You're the type of person who just beats a joke into the ground, aren't you?

It's not a joke. It's their national tradition.

Why was there still rationing in the UK until '54? Wasn't there a post-war boom like there was here?

R48 is the sad one. A regular Fanny Craddock.

Except we'll call her Asshole Paddock.

Fuck off, Mrs. Paddock.

Somehow, between Christmases, I forget about Fanny. And then each year DataLounge reminds me. I love DL and I love Fanny.

Andrea Riseborough would be brilliant as Fanny if they made a feature film about her.

R52 Being an island nation, Britain had to import a lot of food, but after the massive expense of the war, she had little foreign currency, and at the same time had to switch from a wartime economy to peacetime - so switching factories from armament production and back to their pre-war purposes. There was a boom, but it came later as a result.

Fanny always makes me think of another DL icon who doesn't always get the attention she deserves: Dorothy Squires. In the first minute of this clip, you're terrified she might jump through the screen and eat you, and the about 40 seconds in she yanks up the top of her dress and well, you need to watch.

A festive Christmas home

"You obviously don't care about people's feelings do you, Fanny? You have spoken out freely and forcefully in the past." "SUCH AS?!"

There was a BBC TV miniseries about her life called (LOL) [italic]Fear of Fanny.[/italic] It's up on YouTube, but the video quality is horrible.

[post redacted because linking to dailymail.co.uk clearly indicates that the poster is either a troll or an idiot (probably both, honestly.) Our advice is that you just ignore this poster but whatever you do, don't click on any link to this putrid rag.]

Watching Dottie take on "My Way" in that show R57 is seriously alarming - like a raptor savaging its prey.

This one is MINE.

Judy Parfitt would have made a splendid Fanny..."Sometime being a bitch...."

r63, okay, but only if Riseborough gets to be the younger Fanny. Fanny is british slang for vagina, so you know she was a real cunt.

Long sleeves are essential when stuffing the bird!

R60 - Fear of Fanny is a telemovie biopic - starring the wonderful Julia Davis as Craddock - and out of memory - Mark Gattiss as Johnny.

It’s amazing!

Craddock really was the cuntiest cunt who ever cunted - almost...

Suggest watching it as a companion to another British biopic - Enid - starring Helena Bonham-Carter - as Enid Blyton.

Too fabulous.

As to whom was the cuntiest - you be the judge! (We could take a poll?)

Suffice to say they both give Mommie Dearest a run for its money - and I think in comparison Joan comes across as relatively warm and fuzzy.

Don’t know if any f them were actual psychopaths - but definitely narcissists at the very least!

Did she ever makes Pancakes Barbara??

[quote]

Fanny Cradock was an egotistical monster whose attitude deteriorated with each passing year. But to her credit, she was one of - if not the - first modern celebrity chefs having started her public career in 1937! Marguerite Patten was a technically superior cook but despite her head start (first show: 1947) she could never match Fanny's status with British audiences. Fanny's faux accent, on-screen drama, O.T.T. outfits and excess of make-up and jewellery made her fascinating in post-war Britain.

Are we quite, QUITE sure she was female? And not some brilliant drag queen who lived as a woman but was dedicated to satirizing the cruel striving pretenses of postwar middle-class society?

Well, she had kids, R71. Which allows me to paste one of my favourite anecdotes about her, from Wikipedia

[QUOTE]For this marriage Cradock went with a pared down version of her name ("Phyllis Chapman"), and the then 68-year-old recorded her age as 55 on the marriage certificate, even though she had a son who was nearly fifty.

She was no Mary Margaret McMertz!

[post redacted because linking to dailymail.co.uk clearly indicates that the poster is either a troll or an idiot (probably both, honestly.) Our advice is that you just ignore this poster but whatever you do, don't click on any link to this putrid rag.]

In the telefilm about her life, they reenact the scene (which apparently happened) where Fanny has a magazine photographer over to capture her perfect seafood boil and some of the crustaceans are still alive and start crawling off the plate.

It’s pronounced “toh-mah-toes”, you plebes.

I'm off to the chemist for a patty tin!

It's amazing every soufflé she looked at didn't fall, just on principle.

One of the few human beings about whom the description "toxic personality" is a euphemism rather than hyperbole.

How she did not induce murder or suicide in anyone obliged to spend more than a minute in her presence is a testimony to the innate strength of the British character.

I can't believe I've never heard of this woman who seems strangely ahead of her time.

I'm now also fascinated now with Dorothy Squires, who, spoiler alert, forcefully grabs her nipples at the 41 second mark of R57's video. Was that a signal to her grandmother?

[quote]One of the few human beings about whom the description "toxic personality" is a euphemism rather than hyperbole.

In other words ... why she's a DL legend.

In the telemovie, she also has a series of long-suffering gay assistants on her show - whom she terrorises!

It’s not unlike the way cybil shepherd - in the Martha Stewart telemovie - treated her staff.

What is it with these celebrity chef/lifestyle guru women? Sheesh!

It was all those mincemeat shart omelettes.

The part about the British love of Fanny Cradock that I never understood is that she really is the British stereotype of the ugly American- over dressed, over sexed, and over here (probably over paid as well.) In theory they should loath her. I lived in England during the 1970s. Every time I would point that out, there would be one of those "Oh my god, you're right" moments.

More shart tarts, anyone?

The mince’ll run right through ya!

She's like the Evil Twin of our beloved Sandra Lee.

Neither has any idea how good food should be cooked, look, or taste, or any taste in general, but Lee seems like she'd be fun to have a drink or ten with. Craddock, of the other hand, seems like she's using those long gauzy gowns to cover her cloven hooves and barbed tail.

Britain loved its battle-axes R84 .Peggy Mount, Hylda Baker, Yootha Joyce, Penelope Keith, Mollie Sudden, Patricia Routledge, all had great success personifying the kind of bossy harridan you'd cross the street to avoid. Fanny embodies all the traits that appeal, as did Margaret Thatcher. Thatcher made much mileage from this as Britains' first PM in the super sexist 70s. Brits love a bossy , no-nonsense, nanny-knows-best old bag, the beleaguered Theresa May is even now seen as no match for Maggie. The U.S doesn't seem to have an equivalent, perhaps Bea Arthur, 'tho Maude was more feminist than finger wagging nag.

"This is a programme about fish."

I would've loved to have seen her throw down with Julia Child.

I finally got around to watching the Christmas Birds Part 1 episode and I am terrified.

Oh, wait until she gets the pruning shears out. I can only imagine how many shards of bone were left in that turkey.

"I hear you are interested in faith healing, Fanny?" "As someone who has received and experienced it..." "On a serious illness?" "CANCER?!!!!!" "And you were cured?" "Yes. And my doctors will confirm it. But I hold that this has been the most important thing in me life and I don't think it's right for chatsies!"

Surely she and the lovely Mary Berry must have crossed paths a few times, given that they both worked in the post-War food education industry. Oh, to have been a fly on the wall during such an encounter!

Thank you to DL for teaching me about such personalities as Fanny. I've binged on her ghastly YouTube videos, and even watched through the TV biopic despite the terrible video quality.

That's a great clip R93 To think Fanny was ruined by embarrassing homely Gwen Troake by dismissing her Coffee Cream Pudding in a way that has made Gordon Ramsey's name in our less genteel times. Pru Leith is a little more stern than Mary Berry R94 but still no match for the dragon like Mrs Cradock.

r95 There was a time when Britain valued politeness and decency but whatever.

A Holiday Tradition.

“SIMON!!”

If your cakes don't taste like Fanny's you're doing it wrong.

I remember mincemeat and pumpkin pies at my grandmother’s house. I tasted the pumpkin pie and hated it. It was dry, grainy and tasted awful to me. I refused to taste the mincemeat pie. It was this glob of black, tan, yellow (that looked like fat) and brown. No way was I touching that. My mother always yelled at me for being very particular about food. Strangely enough, I really liked turnips with turkey gravy.

That yellow part was suet which is beef fat.

Fear of Fanny is streaming on Amazon Prime for any members.

YAAAAAS

Oh wow....I'm going to watch that today!

Thanks, R101. I know what I'll be doing this afternoon.

Watching it now. I mean this in the best possible way...WHAT A CUNT!!!

R78 the legacy of the British battleaxe lives on.

[quote]Fear of Fanny is streaming on Amazon Prime for any members.

"You painted horror!"

"Where did YOU learn to devil a kidney?"

"Your daughter, it TRANSPIRES, is an unreliable TROLLOP!"

She’s wonderful!

It's hard to grasp just how hard life is for the British people.

The vast majority of them at this point in time had simply never had a nice meal. The concept of enjoying food didn't really exist to them. They were living through 35% percent inflation and restrictions on fuel at this point. UK had recently joined EEC (a bigger deal than it was for the rest of Europe); cutting off its supply chains to the Commonwealth, the only link to any food that was even slightly exotic (i.e., not mushy peas).

Before this they had lived through post-war period of government simply trying to ensure people ate enough calories and didn't eat raw chicken, rationing, and crippling poverty. To say nothing of the millennium of feeling inferior that came about because they didn't have France or Italy's food climate. It was even worse in Ireland where for centuries food was potatoes, if you were lucky.

So you have to imagine how it felt for some sad soul living in Glasgow or Belfast at the time. Having no choice in paying their TV license, they expected to see a glamorous performance. It was easiest way to explain the art of cooking to the British: like training a dog, it requires a degree of broad performance. She had to shout at her underlings when they messed. She had to dress up to fully explain a triumphant yet thrifty choux pastry. Fanny understood there was no alternative to her method -- an authoritative kabuki performance that conveyed confidence to the shaky housewife.

Mock her if you will, but, like Margaret Thatcher pretending to be a housewife to explain economics, that was what Britain needed, if not what anyone wanted.

Come on, Sarah! That one bit on the table, get it! Sarah, my girl, doesn't want the hose, does she?

I did like the way she never felt bound by her natural lipline and just painted one on where she wanted it to be. Inspirational.

R111 Same for her natural eyebrow line.

What? Are there savages out there who eat mashed potatoes that haven't been dyed and piped into a floral pattern?!

What? Are there savages out there who eat mashed potatoes that haven't been dyed and piped into a floral pattern?!

Hold me, Fanny. I'm scared.

[quote]Who among you will be whipping up Fanny's mince?

Pics please.

Underdone egg filled with year-old rum soaked raisins. Yum.

On the bright side, you can barely see it beneath that thick layer of icing sugar.

Comments like R109's are the reason I still come to DL. Bravo, sugar.

Don't want it all leathery. However will you get salmonella?

My dahling Sahrah will just pop it into the oven. THAANK you, Sahrah my love.

Now then.

This is classic. Unwashed hands, stuffing shoved in via an enema and goose torture.

R101- thanks for that delicious tidbit. I watched Julia Davis flesh that cartoon OUT. And it was fun.

You could get away with all sorts of hygiene shortcomings at the time if you said, "This is how they do it in France".

Oh, Britain.

Thank you, R109, we really did an explanation as to why this gorgon was ever taken seriously!

Fortunately she can be enjoyed at many levels; exposure to fancy cooking for the utterly clueless, dark humor for the snarky, and over-the-top levels of unintentional camp for us.

I want to follow along and cook some of those things, but, unlike any good DLer, do not have the booklet.

She did a couple of cookbooks called 'Common Market Cookbook'. Did British people at the time simply refer to the European continent ads the Common Market, as though they only became aware of the existence of place in the '70s?

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R57: Was the poofy nightgown over a neglige some sort of signature look for Dorothy Squires? I like the eyepopping out of synch with the melody quality of her belting. I looked her up on YouTube and the comments just seem deranged in their commitment to this talentless hack.

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That's a long clip, R30. Which is the moment in which she committed career suicide?

R151 it was death by several cuts, her superior attitude toward the cosy competition winning housewife ,the dismissal of houswifes' menu and its replacement with Fanny's own sugary nonsense was enough to turn off viewers. Strange really as she was always a dragon on tv but I suppose she had been studio bound and not unleashed directly on members of the public. Tmes have changed tho' as the likes of Gordon Ramsey gained fame by being obnoxious .

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