MARY WICKES ASSAULTED ME

Vivian Vance. And I liked it.

Edna May Oliver. A veritable octopus.

Gladys Kravitz

#MeToo. She lifted her habit on the set of [italic]Sister Act[/italic] and told me, "Eat hearty!" On the upside, this was the genesis of my stunning weight loss.

Reta Shaw forced me to watch her jill off in the costume room of "The Ghost and Mrs. Muir."

Rula Lenska

Mary Pickford once lifted up her skirt and showed me her knees and said, "How you like them apples"

I cried into my pillow later that night.

She diddled me in the styrofoam cove.

Casper Van Dien - and I loved it!

Maudie Prickett demanded I climb under her sensible skirt, and all from that point on was tweed and regret.

R9 The Man.

"MARY WICKES ASSAULTED ME"

Well, Wickes do like their flamers, OP!

Juliet Mills touched my no-no zone a lot!

Josephine the Plumber did dirty, dirty things to me.

R14

You loved it didn't you ? Admit it boy !

Aunt Bea !!!! She covered me with banana pudding and meringue and allowed Floyd the barber to eat it off me !!!!!

Fran Ryan

Elsa Lanchester wanted me to dress just like her for 1 day.

Barbara Pepper

Mary Treen

She never touched me, liars!

Carmen Miranda sodomized me with one of her bananas

Ethel Mae Potter forced me to lick her in the twatter.

I was double-teamed by both Darrins!

Elvia Allman tried to take my virtue!

Mary Grace Canfield gazed lustily upon my nether regions!

I assaulted myself when I was standing by Dawn Wells in her short shorts.

Elizabeth Patterson stuck her hand down my pants.

Carolyn Appleby. Fingered my hole. Called it a mistake.

Bea Benaderet originated the "fudgy fingers" b-hole assault generations before Jessica Graf was doing it on Big Brother.

Bea Benaderet originated the "fudgy fingers" b-hole assault generations before Jessica Graf was doing it on Big Brother.

Shirley Booth masturbated in front of me.

Harriet MacGibbon forced me to listen to her finger herself on the telephone!

Amzie Strickland, Doris Packer, and Eleanor Audley gang-banged me.

And it fucking HURT!

Mabel Albertson

Mabel Albertson roofied me at Skybar in 2003.

Sandra Gould ate my balls!

Cheetah wouldn't keep his dirty paws off me!

Martita Hunt tweaked my ear because I brought in her morning tea on a tray too early disturbing her Nude Yoga session while waiting for her call on the Warner Bros set doing 'Route 66'. I was a bit distracted at the time because I also had to service George Maharis and Glenn Corbett.

Wilona slapped it!

Cheerio Meredith pinched me on the but-tox.

Nancy Kulp made me exhibit myself in front of her!

[quote] Ethel Mae Potter forced me to lick her in the twatter.

She tried to assault me, but I told her "I have sufficient."

I was forced to submit....I had no power against her.

Dora, I suspect you're a treasure!

(Now when you're finished massaging Mother, I can use you.)

Sorry for the double post—it was my PTSD kicking in. :(

Aimee Semple McPherson made me get on my knees, and it wasn't to pray.

Mary Jane Croft REPEATEDLY called my home and demanded, "Is this the COCKSUCKER residence?"

"Elsa Lanchester "

Well, R18, it WOULD be an improvement.

I think Gracie Allen assaulted me but I was so confused afterwards I'm not entirely sure.

Ann B. Davis made me clean her house.

Hope Emerson!

Bunny Bixler pushed her tennis balls into my.....well, there.

It was GHASTLY.

Spring Byington pegged me all summer, fall, and winter.

Does being sodomized by Arlene Golonka in a Howard Johnson's (restaurant not motel) count?

That horrible Angela Lansbury wouldn’t keep her hands off of me.

Kathy Bates made me eat Count Chocula with her at 2:00 a.m.

Madge Blake shoved a Batarang up my ass.

um, R57?......

Mary Worth.

Madge put my hand in Palmolive.

Zara Cully pressed her leg against mine for the entire flight from LAX to JFK.

Judith Lowry put a crochet needle in my mussy.

Ellen Corby got me involved in satanic rituals !!!!!

OMG R32, you too? I got a lemon chiffon pie out of it.

Weezy Jefferson put her hands at my Centah! And it didn't Help!

Doris Singleton made me watch while she scissored with her daughter MaryAnn!

Reta Shaw made me grope her heaving bosoms. And I creid.

Dr. Ruth.

She spiked my drink!

Alice Backes gave me an enema against my will!

Shirley Jones assaulted me and sang the entire time it happened. I'm not sure which was worse.

Nedra Volz would offer to lick my taint while pleasuring herself. Topless.

Shirley Hemphill taught me how to love again.

Miss Sissy Boodles.

My first (and last) experience with a pussy.

Phil Ober.

Rose Marie made me use her pubes as dental floss.

Audra Lindley anally molested me with a coat hanger. A wire one.

Cathleen Nesbitt repeatedly violated me while going up and down her Acorn Stairlift.

Ethel Merman made me wear her wig lip sync to her disco album.

Sorry ... forgot the evidence.

I was looking for Mary Treen when Joe Besser gave me such a pinch.

I ran to Sunset Gower to seek solace from Shirley Booth, but I suffered the same fate with her as others above. I was silenced with Parker House Rolls. She was a doozy.

Patsy Kelly drugged me

Spring Byington hypnotized me into being her love slave!

Lauren Bacall made me go down on her while she yelled out High Point coffee slogans.

LaWanda Page beat me with her purse. Does that count?

Mrs. Patsy Ramsey, formerly of Boulder, CO took me down to he basement.

June Allyson maid we wear Pamper , I need not go into the details other than I was the "baby", later in life she was able to cash in on her sick fetish !

She whose name I dare not speak.

Miss Andy Cohen made me sit through a Watch What Happens Live marathon.

Does that count?

I still can't talk about the night I was kidnapped by Brett Somers. All I can say is that it involved Smirnoff, Marlboro Reds, and a hotel in Encino. I still don't feel clean.

Damn, funniest thread I've read in a long time. Thanks for cheering me up, DL!

Irene Tedrow smirked as I wept at the touch of her gardening trowel.

A fully sated Margo Channing enjoyed a smoke afterwards.

Ina Garten gave me a Dutch oven.

I've never spoken about this, until now. I was an extra on "What's Happening". I could sing and my Mother was desperate to get me work. Typical stage mother. She was gonna be a star through me. Then on the last day of rehearsals, that's when it happened. Mabel King lured me into her dressing room. I remember her silky voice, it was like velvet.. 'come here baby, I got some candy for you'. I was so naïve. I walked in. "Your mother told me that you can sing, pretty baby. That you want to be on the Broadway," she said in a whisper. "I'm working on my next play, do you want a part." As she said this, I remember the sound of her housecoat unbuttoning and the sighs she would make after each button came undone... oh God... oh God... I can't go on. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done this. It still too painful.

Rose Marie said I could tie her bow any ol' time

Mary Astor kept pummeling me while talking about this Falcon, this damn Falcon. Unfortunately it wasn't about the studio, but I still gave her the bird.

Dorothy and Lillian Gish four-fisted my widdle wee-wee and now it's a Carlsbad woo-woo. Clara Bow walked into my dressing room and said I made her look like a virgin.

Now if I don't keep my legs tightly crossed there's an echo on the set and Mr. Griffith hits me with his riding crop and the Bitches Gish laugh. They are MEANIES.

Rocky the Flying Squirrel.

He took my pencil away so that I couldn't use the phone to call for help.

Franklin Pangborn.

All I can say is I laughed until it hurt.

Irene Ryan forced me to go skinny-dipping with her in the cee-ment pond.

Kaye Ballard. It was hot.

Edna Turnblad forced me to scrub her back in the shower.

I've blocked out what happened after I dropped the soap.

Rossy de Palma. That nose is the biggest cock I've ever had.

She, she, she would pu, pu, put her pur, pur, purse on her lap and tell me to reach in really deep if I wanted a piece of har, har, hard candy. I didn't know she had a sl, sl, slit in the bottom of the purse!

And as I reached down with my arm in the purse up to my little elbow and she kept yelling, "Rummage!!!! Rummage!!!!" and wriggling around in a scary way.

Gangbanged by Eve Arden and Kaye Ballard.

That bitch taught me what the term "Lassie Lick" meant in a very naughty way.

Kathryn Card

Got me hard.

Thelma Ritter

Licked my shitter.

He kept making me kill that mockingbird.

But it wouldn't stay dead!

Olivia forced me to give her a pearl necklace!

Virna Lisi had her hands ALL over my little pussy.

Ruth McDevitt inserted her parasol into one of my most private of areas!

Polly Holliday kept watch at the door while Linda Lavin grabbed me by the vagina bone as I was trying to exit the restroom.

Lucy repeatedly fondled my balls, but I needed the work.

STEVIE NICKS KICKED MY DAUGHTER IN THE VAGINA BONE!

Charo touched me on the cuchi cuchi.

Margaret Dumont greeted me in her hotel room wearing nothing but a strategically placed corsage. How she had it attached, I don't know.

Auntie Mame told me to touch her sidecar!

If it's a sidecar, then why was it in the front?

I got on the elevator at the Hilton with Constance McCashin, and she let out a horrible, silent but deadly fart, the turned around and made a disgusted face at me to imply to the others that I was the culprit.

I did not!

How do you think I broke into the business?

Nancy Walker kept hiding in my dressing room, waiting to catch in my underwear!

The Queen of England exposed her twat to me and sexually harassed me in 1963. I think she might have even tried to rape me.

Cindy Brady

Hope Summers grabbed my ass at the Craft Services Table and said "mama want some cupcakes". I am still humiliated and traumatized.

Doro Merande said my hole tasted dandy.

Brett Somers [blanked] Charles Nelson Reilly backstage at the "Match Game" while Richard Dawson slyly winked at them nearby.

Fannie Flagg said that Brett Somers had [blanked] Joyce Bulifant soon after they all went to the powder room between shows.

Knock yourself out, kids!

1. outed as straight (hah!)

2. wrapped toilet paper around

Donna Douglas never could keep her hands from wandering over my plump, meaty man-ass.

Susan Tolsky wrote me a sternly worded letter.

I had sex with Laura Hope Crews . It WAS NOT consensual.

Alice Ghostley, mostly.

I had sex with Jessica Tandy. l just loved riding Miss Daisy .

Jo Anne Worley made my anus sore...ly

Lorna Luft molested me.

Susan Richardson kept flashing her tits at me when no one else was looking. She couldn't understand that it was always Willie Aames who was my favorite 'friend' on the set.

Hyacinth crossed me off her bouquet list.

Marie Dressler held me down while Wallace Beery fingered my hole.

Helen Martin made be rub her feet between takes.

Molly Snugden made me play with her Pussy, while John Inman watched.

The Dishy Vicar's wife pummeled Hyacinth and the show's writers for not even giving her character a fucking name!

Maria Ouspenskaya attacked me in a Burger King. Fiercely protective of my private areas, I retorted, "No, you may NOT have it your way!"

Margaret Hamilton called me, "her little pretty."

Mr. Whipple squeezed my Charmin.

In "Thoroughly Modern Millie" Mary Tyler Moore does it with a charming Southern accent. Julie Andrews does it with beads and by tap dancing in an old-fashioned elevator with Mary. But to top them all, Bea Lillie's Mrs. Meers does it with soy sauce.

Billy Barty sat on my face.

Jim J. Bullock raped me in a van.

Viveca Lindfors hit me with a pot!

Clara Peller asked me, "where's the beef" and then made me show her. I am so ashamed.

Moms Mabley strapped me to a dinette table in her nephew's dirty stinking jockstrap. She told me filthy jokes and if I didn't laugh, she burned me with her cig.

Paul Lynde forced into an orgy with him, Charles N. Reilly, Dr.Bombay , Dick Sargent, Jim Nabors, Richard...the guy who played Lumpy's dad. Raymond Burr , Charles Hopper, Liberace, Dom DeLuise , and Merv.

The Countess de Lave ployed me with sweet Champagne, then collapsed on top of me in my sleeping car.

Mrs. Trumbull repeatedly lifted her housecoat revealing she was wearing no underwear.

Mary Jackson and Helen Kleeb forced me to eat M n' M's out of their vaginas. Mary had plain, Helen had peanut.

Rosalind Krauss tied me naked to a pole and traced Jeremy Bentham's Panopticon around me in piss yellow chalk. I had to recite Surveiller et punir in perfect French or I got the lash.

Dody Goodman tickled my nostrils with her trimmed pubis.

Margaret Mead chained me to a boiling hot radiator in her tower office at the Museum of Natural History and invited the negro janitors to urinate on me and the radiator until I passed out from the piss steam.

Peggy Cass, she know what she did...

I believed all of you until I read the fiction about Nedra Volz. She was famous for having no sex parts. Her body was as smooth as a Barbie.

Minerva Urecal chopped me to bits with her hatchet face.

Joan Fontaine made me share a double-headed dildo with her, and then she made me suck the end she had been using.

Betty White made me clean Bea's Poop off her floor.

William Frawley put a lit cigar up my anus.

Avery Schreiber asked me if I wanted a Danny Thomas plate job. I wasn't sure what he meant, but it sounded disturbing so I said no, and never told anyone.

Merie Earle eye-raped me at the Pic 'n' Save!

Dr. Granny Clampett assaulted me on her fancy eating table after she roofied my rhumatiz medicine during what was supposed to be a routine medical examination.

She's Mary Wickessss, she's Mary Wicks, she's Mary Wickesssss, she's Mary Wicks, she's Mary Wickessssss, she's Mary Wicks….et cetera ad infinitum.

Mr.Ed, he....it was painful. Suffice it to say.

Thelma Ritter forced me to perform analingus on her!

Ayn Rand told me never to speak of it.

Bea Arthur tore up my hole with her beer can thick cock.

Natalie Schaefer forced me to wear a coconut brassiere and jack off onto a pineapple!

ZaSu Pitts made it clear: submit to the ministrations of her bony fingers or lose my role as Sailor #3 on "Oh, Susanna!"

I have remained silent for much too long. Beverly Archer brought me to her Hancock Park Estate in 1988, gave me a drink, and the next thing I know I am waking up lying on a cardigan and only wearing a pearl necklace. Hollywood Reporter please send someone to interview me.

Jaye P. Morgan? Jaye PEE Morgan!

r177, I always preferred Jane Morgan.

Jane strangled me with you know what. Guess how long it took.

Arnold Ziffel stuck his snout up my crotch!

The Andrews Sisters and the McGuire Sisters played tug-of-war with me in the middle.

I molested Una O'Connor. She never knew what hit her.

Darlene Cates made me rim her.

Noe Coward was very well-mannered.

He paid me to "model" for him "au naturel" in his private suite. And he kept a safe distance on his divan on the other side of the room.

You don't even want to know what Cesar Romero did to me.

Joan Crawford made me clean her....her......common area. With a toothbrush and a can of Bon Ami.

When I wept during the abuse, she told me, "The damned don't cry."

Reginald VanGleason the Third and the June Taylor dancers turned me into their love slave.

Ann Tyrell forced me to sniff one of Don Porter's used jockstraps!

Anna Lee used to threaten to run over my penis with her wheelchair.

Linda Hunt

Kicked me in the cunt!

Ms. Swan touched me with her finger.

She told me

"You look like a man."

#metoo

#itellyoueveryting

Mae Questel made me soak up her wet spots with Scott Towels.

I was assaulted by Allison Hayes-ATTACK OF THE 50 FOOT WOMAN!!!!

Dee Dee Halls made me her human ashtray

Connie Ford snapped my ass with her dishtowel!

I can still see her face...

Ginger Rogers made me fuck her Thai houseboy on the sequinned side of that mink skirt. I have scars!

Elizabeth Taylor used ME as bait!

Trump asked me to pee on him but when I said I was pee shy, Melania stepped in to cover for me.

Not only can she pee like a mare at Saratoga but that gal is a good sport and a team player.

Ann Miller brained me with a can of All-American Soup because I wouldn't cover her shift on Register Fahr.

[195] Thank the goddess I saw your post!! There's newly discovered video surveillance you might be able to use at trial!

I meant that (above) for [R195] : (

((In a whisper...))

Eileen Heckart did things to me... unspeakable things...

Imagine the heartbreak I felt when I discovered my longtime lover Mrs. Santa Claus was in reality Angela Lansbury.

Tessie O'Shea forced me to motorboat her!

Totie Fields tried to rape me with her STUMP!

Marjorie Main's tobacco-stained tongue flicked expertly in my no-no hole as I begged for mercy.

OP, According to Mary, you assaulted HER!

I am the real reason Ann Prentiss died in prison

Erica Kaned me.

I had a fourway with Madeleine Sherwood, Marge Redmond and Shelly Morrison

Gladys Cooper forced me to strip naked and then stared at me spitefully. My self-esteem still isn't quite right.

Fritzi Burr used me then threw me away like a used Kleenix.

Me, Ruth Gordon, and her Oscar statuette ... it wasn't very pretty

[[R200]] Ah feel sahry fer yew.

Fred Mertz made me give him a gum job when I couldn't make the rent one month.

Beulah Bondi bound me in tinsel and made me yell "Clarence!" every time she rang a bell. Nick the bartender helped with the bells.

Donald Fucking Asshole Trump has raped the United States. Does that count as assault?

I was in a three-day with Mr. &Mrs.Wilson.

three-wayr

three-way(sorry I can't type)

The Del Rubio Triplets forced me to lick their boots every time they performed "These Boots Are Made for Lickin'."

Colonel Mustard in the conservatory with a candlestick!

Natalie Schafer forced me to strip naked while she, Dawn Wells, and Tina Louise watched.

Then all three of them peed on me.

Hot!

The skipper raped me, while I. begged for The professor to take his. place.

Mrs. Danvers was very handsy after she'd had a few snorts.

Oprah. I’m not joking. She is a predator.

Elaine Stretch forced me to masturbate in front of her while she sang I'm Still Here!

Estelle Winwood made me drink tea out of her douche bag!

I was raped by Madame while Wayland Flowers masturbated.

Sounds hot, R231.

Nancy Sinatra walked all over me in her boots! And then she posed for Playboy! The horror!

Lotte Lenya tied me to a chair and forced me at gunpoint to watch her go-go dance to the [italic]From Russia with Love[/ltalic] theme. She gyrated lewdly before me wearing nothing but pasties and a babushka.

⁣[/italic]

Helen Thomas assumed I was a Fox News viewer.

Edith Massey called me gauche!

Dot Cotton ashed on my face.

This one try to pass it off on "demons". NEVER AGAIN!

Hermione Baddeley forcibly douched me with Windex and then commanded me, "Hold yer water, ducks."

Catherine Nesbitt made made me lick her nipples while we both wore tiaras.

Burr Tillstrom fisted us for years, and Fran Allison said nothing.

Betty Furness forced me to watch her pleasuring herself while she was sitting on top of a Westinghouse dryer!

Eve Arden forced me to watch her lick Kaye Ballard's pussy.

Doris Packer forcibly adopted me and changed my first name to FUDGE!

Virginia Graham seduced me, then penetrated me with the razor-sharp tip of her one-sided bouffant wing!

Norma Varden gave me a titty twister, then sniffed dismissively.

Una Merkel penetrated me with foodstuffs from the studio commissary, then smirked.

Mr. Nigel Wick fingered me. The friction was so intense, that it ignited my mussy fumes.

Dorothy Parker trapped me alone in her apartment and forced me to serve her four martinis...

Maud Lewis stripped me naked, painted me, than sold me for $5.

Elena Verdugo violated me with a hot churro!

Constance Collier destroyed my budding acting career after I rebuffed her lewd advances.

Jane Darwell caned me with the handle of her black mahogany umbrella, screeching, "TAKE IT! TAKE IT!"

Jane Dulo

Took me from below.

Joan Shawlee forced me to suck off Morey Amsterdam while she sat on the Alan Brady Show set and fingered herself!

Rose Marie shoved a bow up my ass!

[post redacted because linking to dailymail.co.uk clearly indicates that the poster is either a troll or an idiot (probably both, honestly.) Our advice is that you just ignore this poster but whatever you do, don't click on any link to this putrid rag.]

The same poster, over and over, has killed the thread.

Oh well. It was fun while it lasted.

Who killed it, R259?

The Sound of Music nuns taught me how to dance the Virginia Reel, in the nude.

Mrs. Sarah Siddons harnessed me to her pony trap and road me hard.

Darlene Shiley and LuEsther T. Mertz threw a PBS tote bag over my head then diddled me repeatedly while insipid pledge break specials played in the background!

Lurrne Tuttle sucked my dick while Margaret Hamilton rimmed me.

Ann Landers told me to wake up and smell the coffee!

Did you know that Hellen Page Camp was into S&M? I didn't but I do now ...

I'm suing Ann Morgan Guilbert for sexual harassment.

I do know that Shirley Mitchell is into bondage (ouch!) and discipline (owwww) big time

Frances Bavier did sex on my bottom. :(

Mary Pickford gave me a hard- job, while Buddy Rogers pointed a gun at my head. It wasn't that bad- her Parkinson's had really kicked in.

Charlotte Rae forced me to teabag her

Sue Ane Langdon made me her sex slave.

The real Mrs. Patrick Campbell forced me to read the negative reviews of the last "My Fair Lady" revival out loud while she diddled herself in a pool of warm milk.

Jesus groped and finger fucked me.

HM The Queen made me eat scones with clotted cream out of her vajayjay.

Polly Bergen fucked me with a strap-on and used Oil of the Turtle as lube!

Olivia De Havilland forced me to make love to her three times in a row, then masturbate while she ate a box of chocolate macaroons.

This happened last Thursday.

[quote]Sue Ane Langdon made me her sex slave.

Hey, you coulda done worse.

Mina Kolb violated me with a fishing rod and made me call her "Cap'n Ahab"!

They were macarons, R277, not macaroons. You are SUCH a vulgarian.

And that wasn't chocolate. Couldn't you tell when you licked it off my fingers?

The Pope pooped on me! Smelled like incense.

Concetta Tomei

Made me gay.

Angela Lansbury showed me her bedknobs and gave me surprise anal with a broomstick.

R23 brought tears to my eyes....Thank You

Mary Grace Canfield did a deep roto root on my plumbing against my will.

Re: r249...nice try Cheryl, but 4 fingers and a thumb and wrist does not constitute a "fingering", that's a full on fisting. You loved it.

So, Cheryl, when may I return?

Really r283? I trust it was a very nice surprise? Did Madame Angela wear her leathers or the French maid's costume?

Colonel Mustard in the conservatory with a candlestick!

Rosalind Russell mamed me with Angela Lansbury’s typewriter while Pia Zadora watched with glee.

Sylvia Sidney threw an egg cream in my face!

Ellen Albertini Dow stole my bottle of Jungle Juice and a rare copy of [italic]Honcho.[/italic]

Famous socialite Bunny Bixler shoved three ping pong balls up my ass, then added her fist and began to serve.

It was ghastly, but the best orgasm of my life.

*Sob* Mrs. Slocombe made me ... pet her pussy ....

The horror ... the horror....

And she kept on talking about her pussy...

Peggy Rea forced me to remove my caftan and then wore it herself!

Valli.

Minerva Urecal gave me a hot Postum enema and forced me to read her notices from "Exile to Shanghai"!

Vera Vague rode me BAREBACK!

The Borden Twins forced me to MILK them!

ZaSu Pitts bit my tits.

Lurene Tuttle made Norman take a wife

Virginia Gregg made me eat an egg.

bitch was on match game this week on gsn.

Can you imagine how loose MW's pussy is?

Do you remember Una Merkel?

Una used to say, "A smirk'll

Serve you well when you're deflowering

Some bad boy when he's a-cowering

Or if spanking is to your taste,

Do it wanking, and in poor taste."

Mary Wickes

Got her kicks

On Rte 66

(But not from pricks).

Noele Gordon lobbed haggis at me whilst in the nude!

Jared Leto assulted me with this. I LOVED it! And the inflamed forskin cushioned the ballistic impact.

I got fisted by Ruta Lee at the Casa Mañana in Fort Worth, TX!

Meg Wyllie made me eat Nestley Crunch Bars while she painted pictures of bloody childbirth and screamed obscenities when my friend picked up her intercom system, telling him, "This ain't the fucking Copacabana!" She then told everybody that I was afraid of clowns and couldn't piss anywhere but at home.

After years of therapy...

Lureen Tuttle

One day on the set, I leaned over and she "Lureen Tuttled" me...

I was...molested.

Ruth Gordon slipped me a brew of tannis root before she slipped me a ten-inch silver dildo cast from Valentino's cock.

Marjorie Main AND Thelma Ritter.

Margaret Hamilton put a spell on me.

Donna Reed made me make her scrambled eggs after a night in Mexico, and then kicked me in the cuntbone.

Pert Kelton got me drunk on Irish whiskey and molested me repeatedly. Repeatedly!

I'm forming a survivors group. It will be called Counselors United Nationally To end Fear, Anger and Child Exploitation. I invite all of you to become charter members.

Only on DL would a post titled "MARY WICKES ASSAULTED ME" get 318 replies. GO GIRLS!

Will Maria von Trapp be your patron saint, r318?

Mary Wickes was a big old bull dagger who shoved me into a cubicle in the lady's room at the Brown Derby and diddled my clit while holding her other hand over my mouth so I could not scream. A wretched dyke. Who, nevertheless, could do a mean twirl of her index finger.

Thank you for the best laugh I've had in days, R320!

Words of wisdom for those who have been assaulted.

Mitzi McCall violated me with Charlie Brill's cigar butt AND disrespected my pronouns!

Burns and bruises I could handle -But disrespecting my pronouns? That's just beyond the pale!

May Robson questioned my manhood!

Extenuating circumstances, R326...

Patsy Kelly gave me the Tallulah Bankhead Special.

[quote]Mitzi McCall violated me with Charlie Brill's cigar butt AND disrespected my pronouns!

You got off easy. She violated me with Charlie Brill's ACTUAL butt.

Agnes Moorehead locked me in her basement and read Bible verses to me for hours and hours every night. I wouldn't be here today if I hadn't been rescued by Paul Lynde. But that's another story.

Jo Ann Castle beat me into submission with her color coordinated rag time pianos.

Color. Light. Line. Design. I learned it all from Jo Ann Castle.

Oh, that triggered me, r331. Jo Ann Castle and Myron Floren once duct taped me to a sheet of plywood and violated me with pickles.

It's time. I can finally tell you about Bette Davis and the wire coat hangers . Crawford was a rank amateur.

HOLLYWOOD LEGEND MARSHA HUNT COMES FORWARD WITH SHOCKING PENN STATE ASSAULT ALLEGATION!

"I too was assaulted by the Penn State Football Staff & Players" *said 103 year old Miss Hunt, while choking back tears.* It all happened in 1980, when I was a naive young waif of 63. During halftime I wandered into the locker room, hoping to obtain a few autographed footballs for my grandsons. When I shared my request with Coach Sandusky, he crudely replied "Sure Lady. Now what are you going to do about THESE balls?" Immediately flushed, I tried to run out of that locker room as fast as I could! But before I could escape, I was grasped by two terribly strong hands. And that's all I care to share at the moment. Let's just say that I hadn't been rocked to & fro like that since those frequent closed-door "Producer Auditions" at MGM!"

Ena Sharples cut a loud fart in my vicinity

Harriett MacGibbon wore the same dress i did out of spite.

Mrs. Garrett taught me the REAL facts of life.

Minerva Urecal gave me an Ovaltine enema!

Well, look at her, R338. She's not likely to give you the clap.

Charlie Chaplin jumped out of the bushes and made me eat his muffin.

Elvia Allman expressed her anal glands on my sofa AND criticized my collection of milk glass!

Jackie Joseph farted into a balloon and mailed it to me.

How unfortunate.

Jesslyn Fax made me do the hokey pokey and spun me all about. Then she laughed.

Kathleen Freeman made me wear her bathing suit.

Kathleen Freeman once tied me to a chair and force me to watch her eat out Mary Wickes. Afterward, she licked my face and stuck her tongue in my mouth. When I puked, she laughed and said I'd have to sit there until it was completely dry.

MARY'S DICK ASSAULTED ME

The Temptations and The Four Tops!

Uncle Joe approached me rather slow, reaching for my junction.

Florence “The Master” Bates had the best hand in the biz.

[quote] That horrible Angela Lansbury wouldn’t keep her hands off of me.

If you think I'm horrible, then you should see what Tessie O'Shea could really do with a ukulele in the Disney dressing room.

Helen Twelvetrees gave me Dutch elm disease.

Tiger Woods mauled me!

Marjorie Mains forced me to cook eggs and make biscuits.

And Percy Kilbride forced me to eat Marjorie's biscuits!

Liberace , invaded my mussy with a Candleabra .

Tiger Woods fell asleep on me.

Betty Comden tickled my ivories and then my unmentionables!

Phyllis Newman caused an ugly scene when she wouldn't stop laughing.

Nanette Fabray touched me in my no-no place.

R360 But what about her monkeys?

Cornell Borchers pissed in my sink and derided my collection of Fiestaware!

Virginia Graham once assaulted me on the street in NYC. It was in the mid 80s and I was walking up the street next to the Helmsley Palace. I noticed a limo pulled up and stopped several feet ahead of me. As I got close the chauffeur opened the rear door and La Graham got out with her back towards me just as I was next to the car. She was wearing a floor length red cape and she swung around, arm outstretched holding the cape and completely engulfed me in it. I started laughing, she started laughing, and the chauffeur started laughing. She was very sweet about it as we untangled and I went on my way.

Carole Shelley slapped me and called me Shirley!

Shirley Maclaine knocked me down in a theatre lobby.

Hattie Jacques sat on me while eating bacon butties and screaming "BOB'S YER UNCLE!"

Miss Dunaway threw her salad at my feet.

Better than throwing it in your face, R367. Forks hurt.

Marie Dressler told me I had spunk, then took it back.

MARY!!!!! Truly.

R5- She looked the LESBIAN warden of a women’s prison .