How do you know if you have worms?

You have worms for brains, OP.

Go wriggle elsewhere.

Monsters Inside OP

You start rubbing your asshole against the carpet.

Look at ur poops.

Can you train them? Are they pack animals? What's a herd of worms called? An imbroglio of worms? An education of worms? A finesse of worms?

If you're a frequent sushi eater, you probably have worms. If you're concerned about it, your doctor can order an "ova and parasites" lab test on your stool. The bad news for others of us is that a type of Asian tapeworm is now found in six varieties of West Coast salmon.

Can you get worms from kissing someone who who had worms from seafood. Do they deposit worm eggs in the person's mouth? Or blood?

I once knew a girl who had worms. And then she went fishing.

Wipe Vaesline in a ring around your rectum. if you have worms, they will wiggle out at night but not be able to wiggle back in.

r9, do you come from a long line of worm hunters?

Thing that look like grains of rice in your poop means tapeworms. Here's funny story about a guy who ate a lot of steak tartar in Europe,got tapeworms, then had them make their swansong in a public restroom.

R9, and the pre-lube could come in handy....

If your symptoms are itchy butthole, try changing your toilet paper to wipes or a wash cloth.

Fish come up and nibble at your butt.

If you're constantly scratching your hole then you've got 'em.

This, OP:

I eat a lot of bacon. What are the odds that I have worms.

This is a gross topic.

Worms are trashy, so shout their names at your ass (Brooklyn, Kayden, Brittany ...!) and they'll come out

Are there any good worms?

Your owner takes you to the vet and then tries to hide your pills in a wedge of cheese

Hard boil a doxen eggs and buy eleven lemon cookies. Each day shove a hard boiled egg up your ass, wait a few minutes and shove alemon cookie up your butt. On the twelfth day shove the last egg up your ass and when the worm comes out and says "Hey where's my lemon cookie" hit it on the head with a hmmer.

Do you shell the eggs first R21?

I am forever in love with R21. Cannot stop laughing.

This is very good advice.

Worm Hammer

OP, another symptom is stomach pains when you first get up in the morning. If you haven't ingested any food since dinner, they'll try to eat your stomach lining.

And if you get a headache, it means they've crawled into your brain.

Dear Lord in heaven!

It's really more for snakes, but in a pinch, a snake charmer will do the trick.

Do they play pinochle on your snout?

R21, omg I cannot stop laughing!

Why oh why, did I read this thread.

actually......over half the human population on earth has worms...........per the CDC website........ your chances are thus 50-50.......... if you have ever eaten undercooked meat, you probably have them...... enjoy

Can they be passed from human to human?

Why oh why, did R33 post that.

r7 a sexual partner with worms can pass them orally. it's safer if you don't nair "back there" - the worms get stuck in your dingleberries and can simply be wiped away with TP.

Have someone check your ass at night, Opie. They should have a flashlight ready to look at your hole after the covers have been thrown off. If you have them, they'll be scurrying to get back to darkness. Namely, your poop hole.

Its all about raw fish. If you eat Sushi, you probably got worms. "lemon cooks the fish" is a lie. It may change the look or textures but the only way to kill a worm with a hard shell is by heat. AKA cooking it all the way through.

Think about it, if a tapeworm can survive in the extreme acid in your stomach, a squirt of lemon juice on your raw fish is probably just adding flavor for the worms to feast on before they end up inside your stomach.

Look On The Bright Side...

[quote] "lemon cooks the fish" is a lie. It may change the look or textures but the only way to kill a worm with a hard shell is by heat.

So, you're saying that a hammer will actually not work-?

I thought all sushi in the USA at least, is required to be made with fish that has been flash frozen to kill parasites.

What are the worms called that are like 2cm+ long, thin like vermicelli and often attached to each other? When you pull them apart they snap like hairs do, and they are sort of off white/cream-colored...

I felt itching, took an over-the-counter pill to get rid (big fucking mistake) and now they still seem to have doubled in numbers and gotten brave. I keep getting a little family of them in each of my BMs now.

I know they aren't pins or threads, I had plenty of those as a kid (lived on a farm, ugh). These suckers are new to me. Could they be hookworm? If so, how do I treat them without seeing a Doc?

I need to get rid, since I want to comfortably walk around in public without shame, and have sex ever again.

R42, a good doctor has seen everything. Get one, stat.

I once read that there is a theory that Julius Caesar's well known seizure disorder may have been the result of brain-worms caught during his time in Egypt with Cleopatra. Pork in that time and place was worm-ridden. And the Romans and Egyptians had no dietary restriction against it, like the Jews did, and later, the Muslims did.

R21 Actually that's not that far fetched. Apparently you can test for worms by taping a piece of meat to your asshole before going to bed.

You have worms coming out of your asshole, R42. The time for modesty is over. See a doc.

Papaya seeds.

I bet Jennifer Lawrence has worms. She probably likes them, too.

Have you eaten pork tartare recently?

Dear Lord in heaven!

[quote]How do you know if you have worms?

You see a lot of holes in the dirt in your yard.

You might try but you won't ever catch us.

Your hole itches like crazy at night when they come out. There are some over the counter products ask your pharmacist.

Stay away from raw or smoked salmon, that also includes Sushi. Loaded with parasites and worms. Oh, and dont buy the line "ours is safe", everyone selling you that infested crap will say the same thing.

And NO LEMON DOES NOT KILL PARASITES, it only makes them taste better. That's an old Fraus tail. The only way to kill everything is with heat.

And you all make fun of me for being a vegetarian

R21, WW! I can't stop laughing!

More importantly OP, how do you tell the people you're living with that you have them?

All medical advice says you must disclose your infested status so that anyone in close contact with you can take medication and cleanliness precautions. Makes sense...but how the fuck do you start that convo?

"Hey, bro/buddy/honey, take this little orange pill. And don't use my tea mugs. And disinfect after you use the bathroom for a couple weeks. And don't touch anything in the house. Why? Oh, uh, no reason...."

Women often get misdiagnosed with worms when they have yeast infections, and vice versa. Some of the symptoms of both afflictions are identical, especially (sorry for the tmi) discharges, itching, strange 'threads' in the stool and changes in urine color/smell. Lethargy and cravings also happen with both.

Most Western doctors are very poor at diagnosing even one of these, let alone differentiating. It can be exhausting to get a correct diagnosis and then treatment for a female, without accusation of delusion.

Look at your stool. You've probably had an itchy ass. If you see tiny white squiggly things moving -- yes you can see them -- you've got worms. You take some pills for them.

If you feel all shook and shaky,

Kind of slinky, sort of snaky,

You've got worms.

When you tingle and tickle

And your tuchas starts to prickle,

You've got worms.

So just savor the joy ride

Of the squirmin' vermin inside.

You've got worms.

Your ass itches like it was on FIRE! That's one way to tell!

In love with R21

disgusting thread

I had them when I was a kid. I would feel my ass very itchy and I would itch and these little bright white worms would literally come out wiggling on my finger. It was scary. I tried to tell my mother and she just started laughing because I didn't come right out and say " I have worms" I mumbled something like can I get a medication for them in case I have them.

I don't know what the above says about my childhood. My mother needed things spelled out to her all the time. I went to the nearest big town and just asked the woman in the pharmacy for something for worms. She gave me a box and didn't embarrass me. I took the dose and that was the end of that. All of the above happened about 25 years ago. Wow I forgot till I saw this thread. I guess its good that I am laughing.

r64, you didn't keep any as pets?

Maybe your mom is an autist or secretly deaf.

The first sign is you go on the Internet and make a video of yourself crying.

r64

You remember things that never happened

The most common are pinworms - up to half of kids get them but adults do too. You can get them from contact, or someone handling your food that has them (the eggs get under the fingernails I think...)

Anyway, you can order Reese's Pinworm Medicine over the Internet (no prescription needed) and follow their directions (you might need 2 or 3 doses though they say 1 usually is enough). It's worth a try to rule pinworms out (if you have anal itching at night).

The other kind can be treated with oral meds like Albendazole (you can order it from India by typing "Albendazole without prescription.") You can take the kind given to animals - it's the same thing (also "ivermectin" - you can buy it without prescription for animals and then search the internet for the human dosage.)

Good luck on the doctor - you might get lucky but it's hit and miss. And embarrassing.

Are you scooting, Op?

Hate to break it to the vegetarians but you can get worms from raw fruits & veggies. If you eat salad you likely have worms.

[quote] The other kind can be treated with oral meds like Albendazole (you can order it from India by typing "Albendazole without prescription.") You can take the kind given to animals - it's the same thing (also "ivermectin" - you can buy it without prescription for animals and then search the internet for the human dosage.)

Do you mean threadworms? Or tapes? Alben and Iver are both hugely hit and miss from what I can tell. Lots of testimonials online of people having worsening infestation after taking it, as much as getting rid. Of course, it's impossible to know if those luckless types are cleaning and washing properly, treating their pets and kids, cleansing their food and avoiding certain meats/sugars etc. The basic pinworm Ovex is worse than useless for me even if I wash, scrub and disinfect everything and myself like a dervish.

Online shopping sounds like a good workaround, but I've heard some troubling things about liver-scarring and the like arising for people who take wormpills designed for animals. Then again, farmers have been taking meds for their stock for years without side effects....so, what is the real truth? Seems risky but effective. It's fucked up that people are forced to buy black-market tabs from Calcutta just because Docs don't ever take worms seriously or even bother to diagnose and treat them properly in adult humans.

Anyone had any luck with a Cleanse? (Seriously) If one works then that could be a safe alternative.

Take a stool sample and go to the dr. Don't mess around with animal remedies of questionable meds from India, without a proper diagnosis.

R70 are you joking?

If you put a piece of hamburger outside your hole, they'll come out to snack on it.

R70 is half-right.

I've lived close to fruit/vegetable farms for some years and the sanitation in some of them is questionable. Migrant workers are often brought in to pick the crops for cheap and live on the farms in tents, and foreman reduce their bottom-line further by skimping on resources at these camps. There's often one communal tap for running water, portacabin toilets that aren't cleaned often, no facilities to cook hot meals, shared sleeping arrangements, dogs running around the farm shitting with abandon and so on. That's not even going into the dangerous chemicals they spray all over any crop they harvest.

Ever since poking around one of those fruit farms I have washed all produce in boiling water before eating. I sometimes even add white or cider vinegar to properly kill all bacteria and to wash off pesticide.

How to proceed if your Doc didn't do anything? Where do you go? I don't want to take dodgy drugs from India or stop eating, but I don't see another way. You can't see a specialist without a GP referral (at least in the UK) so I can't take this higher. Rn I'm stuck with either living with this, or taking my dog's pills. Help.

I'm worried my GP is about to suggest Delusional Parasitism (which is today's version of 'Hysteria') and mental health intervention (I've had severe depression before and stupidly went and told them, so now it's on my record). I'm totally of sound mind and not even depressed anymore, I just want to insist that someone qualified diagnose the worms I very obviously have and give me a full, intensive course of treatment that actually works. One weak over-the-counter tablet and shooing me off isn't doing a thing to clear up the problem (it has actually worsened the issue) or prevent others getting infected.

I don't know how severe my infestation is or what worm I have as it stands. Isn't there some scan they can do, or anything? I have other symptoms besides bodies in the stool and eggs - I am teeth-grinding, craving sugars, experiencing brain fog and weight retention as well as agitation (crying jags and so on). It's worrying and it's distracting me mentally, to the point driving or holding conversation is tough.

Living with this is hurting my personal life immensely, too. I'm afraid to touch others, let alone kiss or have sex. I can't prepare food or walk outside without anxiety. Living with disgust and secrecy isn't healthy.

One message board I saw gave the advice of seeking a doctor from the third world - from say, India, Pakistan, or somewhere in Africa, as they are more knowledgeable about this sort of thing.

Going to see my Doc again tomorrow, to ask for a scrip for either Albendazole or Niclosamide.

If he refuses or tries to get me into Psych I'll do a runner and then call my nearest hospital to ask for an Indian Doc, or at least someone in Infectious Diseases, R77. It's worth a shout to get this sorted out.

Both Pyrantel and Ivermectin are available OTC, and very inexpensively, if you know where to look.

Your best bet is to purchase it at a tack and feed shop.

Ivermectin is about $3 a tube, and Pyrantel about the same price.

Pyrantel 1 g/day for 3 days, then repeat in 2 weeks.

Ivermectin 9 mg per 100 lb body weight, taken once.

Formulations come in different strengths. The amounts above are the total amount of the drug required. Some of the tubes come with measuring lines on them. Be sure you do your math properly.

Ok, this is so weird and fucked up but I thought you bunch of perverts might appreciate the tale...

SomI just visited my Doctor surgery for the third time about my ongoing parasite issue. These suckers vary in size but are all yellow/orange and fine like hairs, and when you take them out of the stool (gross, sorry) they're joined in clumps. They dry out into black 'hairs' and no one knows what these things are. I've already given a sample (came back negative despite there being worms in it, smh) and took Mebendazole as prescribed for a long weekend. These tablets did nothing and I was pissed, wanting answers.

This Doctor is so young (around my age like 23? 24?) and cute in a nerdy, skinny, acne-scarred but eager-to-help way. The minute I walk in this morning he's grinning at me like an idiot and says, "I was just thinking about you the other day!" I was like uhm dude you were thinking about my worm infestation over the weekend lmao? Then in the nicest most interested way he talks me through what I've been experiencing (nosebleedsheadaches while on the meds, and still seeing worms) and tells me he needs more samples, 3 this time( I'm like HOLD UP but he just smiles and writes out the bottles like nbd).

Then he starts asking me personal questions, like what I do for work, on weekends and if I have a boyfriend. I'm like ??? Is this...part of the assesssment?? I book it out of there and as I open the door to leave he goes, "if you have any worries call me, anytime. My number is on your scrip sheet". Then he gets this serious intense look on his face and goes "I PROMISE we will fix this" like it's the fucking Notebook or something. I was so freaked out lmao. Mostly my local Docs are all old dudes waiting for retirements who dngaf or apathetic women who hate their job so this treatment is very atypical lemme tell ya.

Am I reading this wrong or was this junior doctor hitting on a patient he knows has literal worms? Is he into really freaky shit? Or is he just writing a paper or into his job? This guy isn't even my normal doctor and is a locum so it's not even like he has to keep me sweet, I'm not gonna review him or anything.

R80, I think he's just young and eager to help you; he's not a lazy, jaded asshole like most older doctors seem to be.

Although... what was the phone number he gave you -- his office? An answering service? Or his personal cell phone?

Maybe there's something really magical about your worms and he wants to get infested with them, himself. Don't give your worms away for free, r80.

R80 yeah, on reflection I think he's just a rare good bird in the medical profession. I'm making jokes but it's pretty cool of him to go above & beyond like he has so far. I haven't called the number he gave me but it looks like an external private office number (not my local surgery, but as he's not an in-house Doc he wouldn't have a number for that anyway).

^^meant for R81, sorry.

[quote]Your owner takes you to the vet and then tries to hide your pills in a wedge of cheese

Oh please this is DL -- your owner drops your pills into a cosmo.

[quote]Look at your stool.

Check. Next move?

[quote]Am I reading this wrong or was this junior doctor hitting on a patient he knows has literal worms?

[quote]I eat a lot of bacon. What are the odds that I have worms.

Probably unlikely (at least from the bacon). Bacon is cured in nitrates and it's not really possible for multi-cellular organisms to survive that toxic a substance. Also bacon is usually well cooked before eaten.

Properly smoked salmon is also unlikely to contain living parasites as a smokehouse is too hostile and toxic an environment for them to survive + plus they are cured first with salt. But not all fish is actually smoked, rather "smoke flavored".

If you are worried then freeze the fish for at least four hours before eating and the parasites cell walls will be ruptured and they will die. ALWAYS eat steak tartare or sushi fish that has been frozen for at least four hours first, if in doubt ask the person who prepared it.

My symptoms were that I got funny food cravings and had a strong urge to nest. I painted the spare bedroom light green just in case.

....

I got quite ill several years ago and embarked on several cleansing programs. Did the wormwood/clove/black walnut protocol, and also tried zapping, peroxide, bentonite clay, diatomaceous earth, salt and vit C combos. Each time I noticed a enormous burst in energy and major increase in wellbeing, like we don't notice how much of our precious resources these things are actually capable of stealing from us until they are killed off.

[91] Murderer.

Try a doctor who specializes in tropical medicine

"How do you know if you have worms?"

Those early birds trying to catch the worm will be gathered around your ass.

Can you pull them out??

R91 were those protocols a complete success? How long did you do them for and at what intensity?

Bump for worms:

Have you ever eaten sushi? Then you have worms.

I think R60's diagnostic technique is right on the money.

I want to start selling meatball and duct tape worm detection kits. Would you guys each buy a kit to help get my business going? I can have different kinds of meatballs, different colors of duct tape, if it'll make a difference. Should I package them with an adult diaper?

I heard if you put a pice of scotch tape over your anus before bed - the worms come out at night and you can usually get one on the tape. These would be Pin worms not tape worms.

How do you know if you have a gerbil?

This isn’t even in the top 10 most disgusting threads I’ve read on the DL. Needs more pictures and real life stories.

I will never forget reading this long account written by some mentally ill woman in Wales on a Yahoo medical board. It was apparent within the first paragraph that she had Morgellons. She wrote about these evil, wicked worm creatures which live in her face, neck, trunk and arms. She could see them moving under her skin all day long, and the funniest/saddest part was she said that when she would attempt to put on her makeup, they would pop their heads out of her skin and watch her perform her toilette.

She wailed about the fact that all the doctors told her she had a psychiatric disorder, but of course she knew better.

The most worrisome part of her testimony was that now the worms had invaded her 4 year old daughter's face and body and she feared that her other kids would get them as well. Poor kids. They didn't have a chance.

So uh...how does one know if one has worms?

OP do your worms resemble this?

This is how you know

R105, R60 posted the diagnostic criteria.

They're shawshanking their way out of your balloon knot

[quote]He ate raw fish almost every day — until a 5-foot-long tapeworm slithered out of his ASS

fixed.

Btw, a hundred thousand WWs for R21. I was laughing all day over that one.

I'm pretty sure you can rid your body of worms if you just start eating fresh papaya and or the seeds, can't remember.

Your butt hole itches like CRAZY at night.

That means you have worms.

This topic is so disgusting but I can’t help but LOL!

R80, a 23 year old doctor?? Is his name Doogie??