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Why Can't My Famous Gender Nonconforming Friends Get Laid?

It's a cool Saturday night in my East Village apartment, and Alok Vaid-Menon has just created a Tinder account for me, while Jacob Tobia bats their eyelashes in the background.

Alok and Jacob are two of the most publicly visible gender nonconforming femmes I know. As a performance poet, Alok has just gone solo after touring in dozens of cities in the US and abroad as one half of the poetry duo Darkmatter. Jacob was named to 2016's OUT 100, has made a web series for NBC, and been the subject of a GLAAD-nominated episode of MTV's True Life. Both are trans-identified, but belong somewhere in between genders.... They've become celebrities in their own right, with Jacob regularly walking down the red carpet at LGBTQ galas and Alok featuring in the Janet Mock–narrated HBO documentary The Trans List.

But if you think all that would land them a date, you'd be wrong. And nobody is more puzzled than me as to why such obvious catches are having dating problems when so many clamor for their attention.

It's a reliable source of ennui in our group chats, and as the elder among my nonbinary pals, I've been giving Jacob and Alok dating advice for weeks. Trans dating is tricky, because you have to deal with prejudice on top of all the usual insecurities around wanting to be as attractive as possible for a potential mate. Dating among nonbinary femmes is even trickier, as the vast majority of people, even queer ones, imagine themselves as dating men or women exclusively, so nonbinary folks can complicate how others view one's sexuality....

I'm partnered and not really looking, but since my relationship isn't exclusive, Alok and Jacob convinced me to open a Tinder account so I could demonstrate IRL the maneuvers I'd long touted. I intended to show them something I've learned over time—that if you treat being trans like it's a source of shame, then that's how your date will feel, too....

Instead, what I learned during the social experiment that followed is that Jacob and Alok, like many gender nonconforming femmes, live in a world where admirers applaud them for their radical politics on social media, and people they're attracted to associate with them because of their slayworthiness and social capital, but refuse to make love to them....

As Alok set up my Tinder account, I became confused when they asked whether I wanted to set my gender as "man" or "woman." This all happened in those dark days of autumn 2016, before Tinder added 37 new gender options to the app. Since I'm on the femme side of nonbinary, I thought it would be obvious that I wouldn't label myself a man. Alok then added pictures of me from Facebook. In each of them, I was androgynous and without makeup—except for one...

"OMG, I'm going to switch my gender to 'woman' too so I can look at straight guys!" Alok exclaimed as they picked up their phone, and Jacob followed suit. I'd vaguely known that most of their prospects had been gay-identified men, but it didn't even occur to me that if given only two gender choices, they would need to pick "man" on Tinder so they would get gay instead of straight matches, along with the rare bi and pan guys.

I personally felt that dating straight-identified men was the right choice. My experience has been that straight guys are more willing to experiment with GNC folk than gay guys, because their attractions aren't as socially defined and don't come with a lifestyle attached. Also, there are a lot more of them. This was my experience, anyway.

"Straight boys are soooo cuuuute," Alok said as they and Jacob started swiping, their exaggerated intonation managing to feel both sincere and ironic. "Maybe we should get electrolysis and take hormones," Jacob added in jest, perking up at the bevy of new options.

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by Anonymousreply 160November 2, 2018 9:22 PM

Only their own kind would be attracted to them. And that is a small number of people. It really comes down to science and biology, and you can't deny science even though your brain says you can.

by Anonymousreply 1June 25, 2017 8:05 AM

Few out gay men are into trans. We just want them as girlfriends.

These guys should stick to the usual closeted married bridge and tunnel Jersey crowd. That's who trans appeal to.

Isn't there something like the Edelweiss of old? Or they could turn tricks as street hustlers after work hours around Lincoln Tunnel. EV is too cool.

Call it performance art if they have to.

by Anonymousreply 2June 25, 2017 8:07 AM

"it's virtually impossible to undo the centuries of social conditioning that has defined what the world deems unconsciously desirable"

This is their blind spot and it's not surmountable. It's not social conditioning. It's biology and studies in sexual attraction support this.

by Anonymousreply 3June 25, 2017 8:12 AM

They could get laid if they were people people - if people found them charming, intelligent, fun, compelling, generous, funny, whatever. What do they have to offer to a potential fuck date or a potential partner? Unfortunately, a lot of people who make their "identity" their life work are navel-gazers and just don't attract people, they repel.

by Anonymousreply 4June 25, 2017 9:23 AM

I wonder why no one want to fuck those ridiculous train wrecks, really I'm surprised.

by Anonymousreply 5June 25, 2017 9:35 AM

Exactly, R4. Humorless sanctimony is not an attractive trait,

by Anonymousreply 6June 25, 2017 9:46 AM

[quote] Alok and Jacob are two of the most publicly visible gender nonconforming femmes I know. As a performance poet, Alok has just gone solo after touring in dozens of cities in the US and abroad as one half of the poetry duo Darkmatter. Jacob was named to 2016's OUT 100, has made a web series for NBC, and been the subject of a GLAAD-nominated episode of MTV's True Life.

He just answered his own question.

INSUFFERABLE.

by Anonymousreply 7June 25, 2017 12:54 PM

Have you looked at the pictures of the three of them? I don't know a gay man on the planet that would touch them. Horror shows.

by Anonymousreply 8June 25, 2017 12:58 PM

Alok Vaid-Menon.

You mean this hottie has a hard time getting laid?

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by Anonymousreply 9June 25, 2017 1:15 PM

They call gay people *~transphobic~* for not wanting to fuck them but they themselves don't wan to fuck one another.

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by Anonymousreply 10June 25, 2017 1:19 PM

Jakob isn't handsome but his body and face are cute enough to fuck. His drag looks are amusing but I suppose he doesn't consider it drag at all and something very complicated that only insiders can understand?

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by Anonymousreply 11June 25, 2017 1:22 PM

Boys like girls who are good listeners.

by Anonymousreply 12June 25, 2017 1:37 PM

R12 Gay boys like girls who are good listeners.

Straight boys want girls who are hot.

No one wants the monstrosity sitting on the stoop at R11

by Anonymousreply 13June 25, 2017 1:49 PM

Because they are humorless, mentally ill, and narcissistic? And because plumbing matters to most potential partners, and VERY few are truly pansexual or whatever the current buzzword is.

by Anonymousreply 14June 25, 2017 1:59 PM

Famous? Lol.

by Anonymousreply 15June 25, 2017 2:15 PM

God Lord! They all sound absolutely exhausting. That's why their not getting laid.

It must be like walking on eggshells.

by Anonymousreply 16June 25, 2017 2:19 PM

They're not getting laid because they have personality disorders. No one has time for that.

by Anonymousreply 17June 25, 2017 2:23 PM

Actually I was wrong.

The reason they're not getting laid is because they are not attractive. See picture at link for evidence. Fat, hairy, out of shape and unattractive. Couple that with whatever mental illness they exhibit and yes - totally exhausting.

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by Anonymousreply 18June 25, 2017 2:30 PM

And this is why the are exhuasting:

alokvmenonno i will not shave! no i do not need your unsolicited advice on how to be more beautiful or more feminine. no i do not believe hair has gender! no i am not a woman or a man! no i do not have to look like a cis woman to be real! no i do not need to look like a white woman to be valid! no your insecurity does not get to dictate my identity! [bold]no i am not interested in being desirable[/bold], i am interested in being myself!

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by Anonymousreply 19June 25, 2017 2:34 PM

R19 Jesus Christ, my eyes!!

by Anonymousreply 20June 25, 2017 2:36 PM

And here's the other one telling us why he's fucking gorgeous and has a great body and the problem is everyone else....

Exhausting.

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by Anonymousreply 21June 25, 2017 2:37 PM
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by Anonymousreply 22June 25, 2017 2:44 PM

I remember Jacob from a Yahoo story on how he felt out of place on the red carpet due to his feeling as if people were judging him about his body hair.

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by Anonymousreply 23June 25, 2017 2:46 PM

I wonder if these things are really mentally unhinged or being well compensated to push an agenda. Also, as if they dressed and acted like men they're really not all that unfuckable

by Anonymousreply 24June 25, 2017 3:16 PM

[quote]I wonder if these things are really mentally unhinged or being well compensated to push an agenda.

I'm sure there's a good chance of the latter being true.

by Anonymousreply 25June 25, 2017 3:18 PM

HBOverrated threw [italic]Looking[/italic] on the sword and is serving up this retrograde homophobic crap?

by Anonymousreply 26June 25, 2017 3:23 PM

Ah Jacob got pudgy. It was potentially fuckable as a skinny twink drag queen.

by Anonymousreply 27June 25, 2017 4:38 PM

These two need to be sent to Dachau; I wouldn't mind if they got some real pain electroschock therapy

by Anonymousreply 28June 25, 2017 4:45 PM

R28 - no posting history. Psychopath.

We can have some snarking on them, but Dachau?!!!!!! gross pig

by Anonymousreply 29June 25, 2017 4:49 PM

Why can't Alok and Jacob just date each other if they're so damned hard up? Or date other "nonbinary" types like themselves? Isn;t that the simplest solution?

Oh that's right: even [italic]they[/italic] find each other hideous despite their "fabulousness" and "fame." But, according to Meredith, if you're a cis male and happen to find them unattractive, you're a bad person. Go figure!

by Anonymousreply 30June 25, 2017 7:38 PM

Their type has a shelf life. A smart person evolves over time and reinvents with greater stability and subtlety. No one wants that, although that type does well until 30 or so.

by Anonymousreply 31June 25, 2017 8:14 PM

Don't forget Alok is a pedophile who describes girl children as sexual and "kinky".

by Anonymousreply 32June 25, 2017 8:26 PM

Extremely unattractive men who want to get laid seem to think becoming trans or non-binary is going to cover up the ugly?

Good luck with that honey.

by Anonymousreply 33June 25, 2017 8:51 PM

Who wouldn't want to fuck this hot piece?

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by Anonymousreply 34July 22, 2017 3:26 AM

It is really as simple as others have said - most people are attracted to a combination of sociocultural and biological characteristics. Gender-nonconformists read as performance artists and not neccessarily sexual partners and no amount of trying to shame people into thinking that is transphobia will change it. It really is a weird corner gender nonconformists often pish themselves into - most men and women spend years becoming comfortable in their own bodies so while a nongender conforming friend is often very interesting and often extremely thoughtful in their approach to deconstruction, it just isn't attractive to a sizeable amount of people. However, I suspect it is really the case that the people who are most into nonconformists are not neccessarily in the gay community - there is a subsection of straight guys that are into it.

by Anonymousreply 35July 22, 2017 3:35 AM

misskatiecharmim: mini impressed I was able to do this while reeeeally drunk on unstable slippery basket weave patio furniture ⚡💜 OH YEAH and extra special shout out to the hater in the background talking shit then shaking her head while her boyfriend raises his eyebrow. You wish you had these Charms honey. 😂 #bossbabe #transpride #lgbtpride #vip #hatersgonnahate 😂see

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by Anonymousreply 36July 22, 2017 3:46 AM

Katie Charm disturbs me more than any of the other identifarians. Why is there such a high proportion of trans military men who bounce from super-macho studs to fey Hulk-shouldered Marys?

by Anonymousreply 37July 22, 2017 3:56 AM

Alok could probably land/date/have sex with guys who are as ugly as him. But nooo, he wants the hot guys, who will never fuck him even if their lives depended on it.

by Anonymousreply 38July 22, 2017 4:10 AM

"It really is a weird corner gender nonconformists often pish themselves into - most men and women spend years becoming comfortable in their own bodies so while a nongender conforming friend is often very interesting and often extremely thoughtful in their approach to deconstruction, it just isn't attractive to a sizeable amount of people."

I don't agree that gender nonconformity per se is the problem. I've known plenty of butch lesbians who attracted lots of other women and plenty of feminine gay gays who attracted lots of other men. Being gender nonconforming and looking/acting as though you just escaped from a mental hospital are not the same thing. It's the latter that is the problem.

by Anonymousreply 39July 22, 2017 4:11 AM

So these clowns were on Tinder, hoping to get straight men to fuck them? How delusional can they get?

I sincerely hope Alok and Jacob are not hitting on straight men in public, such as in bars. That would be extremely dangerous for them.

by Anonymousreply 40July 22, 2017 4:15 AM

R37 In his case he didn't cut it as a super-macho stud, in his old cryptocurrency videos on Youtube he has this "most interesting man in the world" alpha male act that reads just as put on and almost as creepy, he wasn't fey but he also wasn't convincing to anyone except the reddit neckbeards in his comments. My guess is a bunch of unpopular, weird, yet narcissistic straight men join the military to try to obtain this persona they think will get them women but it doesn't work since the majority of straight women can smell the creepy weirdo vibe coming off of them from a mile away then after they realize this they decide to try a new persona as a woman.

by Anonymousreply 41July 22, 2017 4:17 AM

This is what successful gender non-conformity looks like. Guy/Girl/Alien from outer space, he's totally doable for everyone. Place him beside Alok, Jacob and co, and the problem becomes apparent: unattractiveness does not improve by blurring the lines; it improves by picking a side.

Few people can do androgynous beauty like below (but those few are ridiculously hot).

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by Anonymousreply 42July 22, 2017 4:30 AM

I am trans and I wouldn't have sex with either of these two clowns. I can't imagine that they believe any sane human of any sexuality would find them sexy. Most transwomyn, like genetic women, and self-respecting drag queens work hard at being attractive. Back in the day when I was partying and hooking up, I was getting laser hair removal, nails, facials, peels, consultations with professional makeup artists, biked & did weight training to keep thin and fit. My circle of trans friends had no difficulty getting laid because they worked on their appearance. These jokers slam on some wet-n-wild in garish colors and anounce that they are "fuckable." Bitch Please. Their clothes don't even fit in the pictures posted here. You present a joke and that is how you will be treated.

by Anonymousreply 43July 22, 2017 4:47 AM

:) :)

by Anonymousreply 44July 22, 2017 8:45 AM

That really is one of the eternal conflicts in life - everyone's life - whether to please yourself or to please other people. To be happy you have to please yourself, but to get laid you definitely have to please others.

And to make the choice, you have to have a ghost of a fucking clue about real life that these "famous gender nonconforming" people so desperately lack.

by Anonymousreply 45July 22, 2017 10:29 AM

[quote]Guy/Girl/Alien from outer space, he's totally doable for everyone.

[quote]Few people can do androgynous beauty like below (but those few are ridiculously hot).

No, you're wrong about that.

In no way is "it" doable for everyone.

It's doable for people who have a fetish for that type of thing.

by Anonymousreply 46July 22, 2017 11:06 AM

"As Alok set up my Tinder account, I became confused when they asked whether I wanted to set my gender as "man" or "woman." This all happened in those dark days of autumn 2016, before Tinder added 37 new gender options to the app. "

by Anonymousreply 47July 22, 2017 11:20 AM

Being confused about being man or woman is the basic truth of the situation, here. 37 new gender options does not feel like an Enlightenment from the "dark days" of 2016.

by Anonymousreply 48July 22, 2017 11:23 AM

"My experience has been that straight guys are more willing to experiment with GNC folk than gay guys, because their attractions aren't as socially defined and don't come with a lifestyle attached. "

This right here sums their movement up nicely.

Worshiping straight guys and denigrating gay men is not in any way progressive. It is what the mainstream world has been doing for centuries.

If you believe this nonsense, there is nothing enlightened about you.

by Anonymousreply 49July 22, 2017 11:30 AM

Who would want to fuck these train wrecks? Me, never!

by Anonymousreply 50July 22, 2017 11:38 AM

R48 I don't think these bunch has gender dysphoria. I think they are men who like to crossdress and are too lazy to put in a serious effort. Look at Alok's horribly applied makeup. It looks like a four year old did that shit.

by Anonymousreply 51July 22, 2017 12:16 PM

Nothing that a good dose of algebra won't cure.

by Anonymousreply 52July 22, 2017 12:38 PM

They can't get laid because they're not hanging around with the sort of people who want sex with them. Most people of even average intelligence know how to deal with this predicament, why can't these guys work it out? Either change yourself to suit your crowd, or find a crowd that suits you.

by Anonymousreply 53July 22, 2017 12:55 PM

This is exactly the kind of shit that is making me pretty much back away from the GLB+ "community".

by Anonymousreply 54July 22, 2017 1:01 PM

[quote]Why is there such a high proportion of trans military men who bounce from super-macho studs to fey Hulk-shouldered Marys?

With the autogynephile ones, you'll notice a lot of them say things that indicate they think women are treated like delicate princesses with few responsibilities. They'll also talk about how tiring and stressful "living up to male expectations" is. The "macho" military guys really love that idea. Probably all guys pushed into the military by their mean daddies and feel inadequate.

by Anonymousreply 55July 22, 2017 1:03 PM

They need to stop with the "deconstructing genre" thing.

Deconstruction is a philosphical theory, nothing more. Alok and Jacob act and look like social experiments gone wrong. They look like the intellectual non convincing ideas of what a non-binary people would look like if they exist.

But now, people are not sexually attracted to "social experiments" or "philosophical concepts", that why no one want to touch them even with a stick. They need to come back to the real world, the world where non-binary shits are no more than a joke.

by Anonymousreply 56July 22, 2017 1:06 PM

Nah, they don't have to "come back to the real world", not when there's so many other blue-lipsticked , curtain-wearing, non-binaries out there. NBs fuck NBs, don't they? Or are their NB friends all terrible bigots?

by Anonymousreply 57July 22, 2017 1:16 PM

They and their friends "say one thing but do another". do = fuck

by Anonymousreply 58July 22, 2017 1:20 PM

Exactly. But Meredith would rather blame everybody else for the evil crime of not being attracted, than scrutinize the hypocrisy of their own people.

by Anonymousreply 59July 22, 2017 1:23 PM

For all of their endless whining and bitching about how oppressed and marginalized they are, they all seem to live quite privileged and cushy lives.

by Anonymousreply 60July 22, 2017 1:29 PM

No excuse for this past adolescence

by Anonymousreply 61July 22, 2017 1:32 PM

"OMG, I'm going to switch my gender to 'woman' too so I can look at straight guys!" Alok exclaimed

And there we have it. For all their boundary-breaking, taboo-shattering bravery, these two worship at the shrine of the perfect, heterosexual man. Nothing less will do. They don't want sex with non-binary gender-fluids. They'd positively recoil at such an indignity.

by Anonymousreply 62July 22, 2017 1:49 PM

Is it ALok give good blowjob?

by Anonymousreply 63July 22, 2017 1:50 PM

[quote]For all their boundary-breaking, taboo-shattering bravery, these two worship at the shrine of the perfect, heterosexual man.

The perfect, WHITE heterosexual man, no doubt. They want some Chris Pratt lookalike to come and ploy their non-binary asses. As if that's ever going to happen.

by Anonymousreply 64July 22, 2017 2:05 PM

"Why is there such a high proportion of trans military men..."

And pilots, for some reason (military and non-military). Lots and lots of pilots.

by Anonymousreply 65July 22, 2017 2:16 PM

You know, all the gender bullshit aside, it looks a lot like these two guys are only interested in the ones who aren't interested in them. If Meredith really wants the question answered, he should consider asking them both why they insist on pursuing the unattainable and rejecting the attainable. Do they both have issues around intimacy ? Fear of commitment? Is that the real reason they deliberately present in a way that will put off most people?

by Anonymousreply 66July 22, 2017 2:25 PM

Even an ogre will get laid if they are FILTHY RICH.

So that's my answer to Alok and co.

by Anonymousreply 67July 22, 2017 2:27 PM

They're gross and the costumes aren't even close to being their worst problem. Put the same costume on Tom Holland and he'll get laid.

by Anonymousreply 68July 22, 2017 2:27 PM

It's look like Alok could have sexy time

by Anonymousreply 69July 22, 2017 2:43 PM

Alok's Mama here. I want to see Alok settled with nice straight man just like Alok deserve.

by Anonymousreply 70July 22, 2017 3:05 PM

"No one want that monstrosity sitting on the stoop"

I have been giggling for 10 minutes R13

by Anonymousreply 71July 22, 2017 5:29 PM

R46 I don't have a fetish myself, but I am open to beauty in all its forms and varieties, from someone as androgynous as Colton Haynes to someone as masculine as The Rock. Beauty is its own argument, and defies barriers.

by Anonymousreply 72July 22, 2017 6:47 PM

When anyone has to use the word "famous" to get laid, there's a problem. let alone that they look like a pair of mentally challenged children playing dress up in their mommy's closet. good grief

by Anonymousreply 73July 22, 2017 6:52 PM

I feel like "The Boys in the Band" needs to be updated to a T party.

"You're a sad and pathetic man. You're a homosexual and you don't want to be, but there's nothing you can do to change it. Not all the prayers to you god, not all the analysis you can buy in all the years you've go left to live. You may one day be able to know a heterosexual life if you want it desperately enough. If you pursue it with the fervor with which you annihilate. But you'll always be homosexual as well. Always Michael. Always. Until the day you die."

by Anonymousreply 74July 22, 2017 7:13 PM

Since when is Colton Haynes "androgynous"?

Anyway, crossing my fingers over here that Meredith descends on this thread too.

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by Anonymousreply 75July 22, 2017 7:32 PM

[quote] Since when is Colton Haynes "androgynous"?

Obviously r72 has a thing for muscular guys but has somehow deluded himself into thinking he likes "androgynous" guys.

Colton Haynes is not the least bit androgynous. Chris Colfer is androgynous.

by Anonymousreply 76July 22, 2017 9:02 PM

I actually think Alok is kind of attractive ... as a male and not as Toucan Sam.

by Anonymousreply 77July 22, 2017 9:33 PM

r77, go for it.

by Anonymousreply 78July 22, 2017 9:35 PM

[quote]Colton Haynes is not the least bit androgynous. Chris Colfer is androgynous.

These days, not even Colfer.

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by Anonymousreply 79July 22, 2017 9:47 PM

There's confusion what androgynous looks like. So here's an example.

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by Anonymousreply 80July 22, 2017 9:51 PM

And here's another.

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by Anonymousreply 81July 22, 2017 9:54 PM

Never stick your dick in crazy.

by Anonymousreply 82July 22, 2017 10:17 PM

Hot and crazy makes up my normal prey group R82

However, Jacob and Alok are ugly and crazy, and nobody got any time for that.

by Anonymousreply 83July 22, 2017 10:32 PM

They are all truly hideous.

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by Anonymousreply 84July 22, 2017 10:55 PM

Jamie Shupe, the first legally non-binary person in the United States, takes on Trans, Inc. and calls out the mainstream media for repeatedly censoring his gender critical views. You will stand up and cheer!

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by Anonymousreply 85July 23, 2017 1:11 AM

The pictures at R42 are of Colton Haynes, people. When he was younger, and pretty.

by Anonymousreply 86July 23, 2017 4:09 AM

It wasn't lost on anyone, R86.

Colton isn't androgynous at any age. He's a distinctly male beauty specimen.

by Anonymousreply 87July 23, 2017 5:11 AM

r42, he's still not androgynous. He's a muscular masculine model wearing eyeliner and fake pearls.

by Anonymousreply 88July 23, 2017 5:11 AM

I'm curious whether Alok and Jacob are happy Meredith wrote this article about them. It's pretty humiliating to have someone announce to the world that you can't get laid if your life depended upon it.

"THEY'RE FABULOUS! WHY DO MEN RUN SCREAMING FROM THEM LIKE THEY'RE REPULSIVE AND HIDEOUS AND UNTOUCHABLE??"

It's such a hostile and passive-aggressive thing to do to your "friends."

by Anonymousreply 89July 23, 2017 6:32 AM

That's a pretty amazing article at R85 . I hope it goes viral.

by Anonymousreply 90July 23, 2017 6:38 AM

The article at R85 will be dismissed by the trans cult as transphobic

by Anonymousreply 91July 23, 2017 6:45 AM

R55 needs to shut up. Citing the anti-lgbt pseudo science of Blanchard and Bailey (himself an alleged Tranny Chaser!) just shows that the Revolting Right are now part of the Stormfront ideology. Not only are you obvious, more importantly, you are boring.

by Anonymousreply 92July 23, 2017 7:35 AM

Tedious Trans Troll ^^^^

by Anonymousreply 93July 23, 2017 8:08 AM

[quote]. My circle of trans friends had no difficulty getting laid because they worked on their appearance.

Aw, that's a shame. We don't have to work at it at all and we can get laid by straight men any time we want,

by Anonymousreply 94July 23, 2017 10:06 AM

R94. Sure-I'll tell that to all of the women at my spa, salon, gym, etc. They will be glad to know that a Datalounge Klan troll says they don't need to moisturize, shop for clothes, or work out. Idiot.

You Klansmen are Retards....

by Anonymousreply 95July 23, 2017 10:30 AM

They don't need to do any of those things to get laid, IDIOT @ R95.

by Anonymousreply 96July 23, 2017 11:02 AM

Tedious Trans Troll , R95, resents the fact that real women don't have to pretend: they really are women. Unlike the men who pretend and have work hard to disguise their male features. Tedious Trans Troll resents that any woman can go out and come home with a man,( if she wants), any night of the week, without having to guilt trip or pressure anyone .

by Anonymousreply 97July 23, 2017 11:06 AM

'Famous' ? How low are setting the bar?

by Anonymousreply 98July 23, 2017 11:08 AM

97 how much does the h8 group pay you to be up posting garbage? I hope you are making more than minimum wage!

by Anonymousreply 99July 23, 2017 11:11 AM

I hope your benefits check covers your rent R99

by Anonymousreply 100July 23, 2017 11:13 AM

{{snort}} @ R99. Yes, the real life experience of millions of authentic, natural born women is nothing compared to the delusions of one fugly, hairy, 6 foot tall, translunatic with a baritone voice, man hands, and fake lady parts. LOL. Oh, my sides.

by Anonymousreply 101July 23, 2017 11:23 AM

R101. Pulease-you are just a sad Rightwing troll, poorly paid and believing in a hopeless cause. You are just wasting your time here & someone else's money. SAD

by Anonymousreply 102July 23, 2017 11:28 AM

No one gets paid to come here Paranoid Polly. This is a site of a few hundred people at best.

by Anonymousreply 103July 23, 2017 11:31 AM

R102 is "literally shaking" all the way back to Tumblr now..

by Anonymousreply 104July 23, 2017 12:06 PM

These guys are all performance artists using the clear "gross out" factor of their physical appearance to shock, provoke, and entertain. It's similar to Lena Dunham's shtick. Although, she's a real woman who can leverage it into million dollar deal with HBO, and has a real vagina that can attract a straight guy no matter who it's attached to.

This is at the heart of the queer/trans hatred of white females (who they derisively label "cis.") White women will always win first place in the competition for heterosexual white males. Brown guys with bad wigs will always be dead last.

For such a bunch of navel-gazers, I'm surprised that they can recognize the inherently racist, sexist, and homophobic nature of their own dilemma. Be a hairy Indian guy and fuck someone who wants to fuck a hairy Indian guy. Problem solved.

by Anonymousreply 105July 23, 2017 1:16 PM

Okay this is very simple.

Penis=male

Vagina=female

Putting on a dress, makeup and cha-cha heels doesn't change that.

by Anonymousreply 106July 23, 2017 1:24 PM

I ❤️R106.

by Anonymousreply 107July 23, 2017 2:10 PM

The hot new word for TERFs: "Clitler."

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by Anonymousreply 108July 23, 2017 2:16 PM

Alok smoldering when you get in the sack

by Anonymousreply 109July 25, 2017 11:50 AM

Can someone be gender nonconforming and not run around with shit on their face? If he lost the face paint and the clothes from a children dress up box he'd look good to many, I'm sure.

by Anonymousreply 110July 25, 2017 12:23 PM

"I'm surprised that they can recognize the inherently racist, sexist, and homophobic nature of their own dilemma."

None of the Trans Ideology bears close analysis, if you look at it closely it's all about adherence to outdated and non-obligatory sex roles. And IMHO that's why they're so devoted to shouting down or guilt-tripping opposition, rather than engaging in debate.

And people like Alok and co.,... it really is surprising to see people so self-absorbed yet utterly lacking in self-awareness, but the world is full of people like that.

by Anonymousreply 111July 25, 2017 3:47 PM

Self-absorbed to the nth degree but lack awareness because they don't/can't 'step outside themselves' for a minute.- They have no idea how they come across to other people, and they lack empathy. Because they don't understand that they aren't the only ones uncomfortable with the gender imposed on us, they assume everybody else but them is happy with and "identifies with" sex role stereotypes . Calling us "Cis" is one expression of that insensitivity and arrogance.

by Anonymousreply 112July 25, 2017 5:00 PM

Guys like Alok and Jacob are flaming, lisping queens and they just need to fucking OWN it. There's nothing wrong with that. It's all about self-loathing with these guys, they invent this "non-binary" and "genderqueer" horseshit because they are too afraid too look in the mirror and accept the fact that they are effeminate homosexual men.

by Anonymousreply 113July 25, 2017 9:22 PM

If Jacob cropped his hair like a skinhead and dropped the make up / drag I'd so fuck him. I'm waiting Jacob...

by Anonymousreply 114June 28, 2018 10:18 AM

They bitch and moan endlessly about "cis men," but cis men are the only ones they want to fuck and have relationships with.

And I think it's been mentioned before, but if a biological woman dressed up and made herself up like a deranged circus clown, she wouldn't be getting laid either.

by Anonymousreply 115June 28, 2018 3:21 PM

I pity the fool who wants to fuck straight guys off Tinder.

by Anonymousreply 116June 28, 2018 4:41 PM

Is it because no one, whatever their gender / sexuality, would get fucked in 2018 looking like Cyndi Lauper circa 1983? Asking for a friend.

by Anonymousreply 117July 1, 2018 10:43 AM

Bigots always say science supports their bigotry.

Even the ones with science degrees seem not to have learned anything at all.

Just look at Ben Carson.

by Anonymousreply 118July 1, 2018 10:48 AM

Alok is coming to London in August to do...whatever it is he does...poetry? I'm so tempted to go to laugh. A really cute gay guy I used to work with is going - but in the last year or two he's started declaring himself gender fluid and wearing dresses and make up. He has a few high profile trans / fluid friends and I think he's been a bit brainwashed. It's really quite sad. He never gave any indication of this 'fluidity' rubbish in the years I knew him. Xhm. Xer. Whatever.

by Anonymousreply 119July 20, 2018 11:08 AM

Because they're pretentious, insufferable dick's?

by Anonymousreply 120July 20, 2018 11:15 AM

Alok has a brief Wikipedia page, and the last sentence is “Vaid-Menon is lactose intolerant.” Like anyone gives a shit.

by Anonymousreply 121July 20, 2018 11:41 AM

That's weird because I'm gender-fluid intolerant.

by Anonymousreply 122July 20, 2018 11:43 AM

Serious question: Is beneficial to be this delusional? I mean the downside is you are constantly surprised to find people aren’t in love with you.

by Anonymousreply 123July 20, 2018 12:56 PM

Its got to be dome kind of personality disorder to be this self obsessed.

by Anonymousreply 124July 20, 2018 1:09 PM

*some

by Anonymousreply 125July 20, 2018 1:14 PM

[quote]It's a reliable source of ennui in our group chats

What is this supposed to mean? Whenever the topic comes up they recline listlessly on sofas, smelling salts at hand?

by Anonymousreply 126July 20, 2018 1:25 PM

Lol r122.

Me too *burp*

by Anonymousreply 127July 20, 2018 2:51 PM

New video from Magdalen and it's hilarious!

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by Anonymousreply 128August 1, 2018 11:19 PM
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by Anonymousreply 129August 2, 2018 2:51 AM

Blue plaque to honor lesbian, but the word "lesbian" is not used. Julie Bindel kicks ass!

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by Anonymousreply 130August 3, 2018 10:36 PM

Such a pretty lady!

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by Anonymousreply 131August 3, 2018 11:59 PM

R123 I think that deep down they know it.

by Anonymousreply 132August 4, 2018 12:08 AM

[quote]And there we have it. For all their boundary-breaking, taboo-shattering bravery, these two worship at the shrine of the perfect, heterosexual man. Nothing less will do. They don't want sex with non-binary gender-fluids. They'd positively recoil at such an indignity.

Exactly. What it basically comes down do is that these guys (yes, GUYS!) like Alok, Jacob and co. have totally unrealistic expectations. I would bet money that for all their ranting and raving about "white cis men" that's who they really want. Some super-hot, masculine, all-American jock to come and plow their sorry sideshow asses. They're basically looking for some Chris Evans lookalike, as if that's ever going to happen. They're just totally delusional and pathetic.

PS if you think they look ridiculous now in their non-binary/genderqueer costumes, just wait until they're middle aged with pot bellies, jowls and receding hairlines. That look is going to be downright frightening on older men.

by Anonymousreply 133August 4, 2018 12:14 AM

r35

[quote]while a nongender conforming friend is often very interesting and often extremely thoughtful in their approach to deconstruction

No.

by Anonymousreply 134August 4, 2018 12:15 AM

Think you're as annoyed and fatigued as you can possibly be? Well, not so fast-- here come the Multiples!

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by Anonymousreply 135August 4, 2018 12:45 AM

The outfit at R131 would be okay without the 5 o'clock shadow. R133 I've seen a guy who looks like the middle aged version. He wanders around south of market in SF. Yes it's creepy as fuck. I will say you've always got plenty of space on the sidewalk when you look like that. People really give you a lot of space.

by Anonymousreply 136August 4, 2018 12:56 AM

Why did the other thread get deleted? It was rightfully ridiculing a series of tweets posted by JT.

by Anonymousreply 137August 13, 2018 4:44 PM

He probably has a Google Alert on his name. Many threads about him have been deleted here. Same with Alok.

by Anonymousreply 138August 13, 2018 4:57 PM

Who's a pretty lady?

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by Anonymousreply 139August 13, 2018 5:08 PM

I am gender non-conforming - hear me roar!

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by Anonymousreply 140October 30, 2018 9:31 AM

Jesus, I mean he's gross enough but he's wearing a dress that Rose Nylund would wear on a date with Miles and it's awful.

by Anonymousreply 141October 30, 2018 4:06 PM

One of the Alok comments: "Ugh I’m just a silly cis white girl but you are so important to me! You slay so hard! Thank you!!!!!! fucking dumb bitch, gender traitor, trans hand maiden.

by Anonymousreply 142October 30, 2018 4:08 PM

It's usually young, naïve, well-intentioned but obviously misguided white girls that enable this shit.

by Anonymousreply 143October 30, 2018 4:22 PM

I hate this era! Androgynous people used to be HOT in the 70s and 80s; the only labels they were obsessed with were designer. Slim, sexy, catlike bods, and excellent fashion sense - very fuckable, unlike the hairy, overweight Forever 21 rodeo clowns of today.

by Anonymousreply 144October 30, 2018 6:33 PM

"Odd socks are so over. Odd boots is where it's at bitches!"

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by Anonymousreply 145October 31, 2018 8:22 AM

[quote]Why Can't My Famous Gender Nonconforming Friends Get Laid?

^^^ Because...look at them.

by Anonymousreply 146October 31, 2018 8:50 AM
by Anonymousreply 147October 31, 2018 9:00 AM

R144 I've been thinking the same thing. Bowie, Prince, Grace Jones, Annie Lennox were all beautiful and hot. They all got laid.

by Anonymousreply 148November 2, 2018 3:07 AM

They also knew how to dress.

by Anonymousreply 149November 2, 2018 3:10 AM

Are r144 and r145 the same poster? Either way, the pic at r145 is the perfect illustration of "hairy, overweight Forever 21 rodeo clown" and vice versa.

by Anonymousreply 150November 2, 2018 3:12 AM

Is that a real published article R1? Written by a "friend" of theirs? Or a parody of them?

by Anonymousreply 151November 2, 2018 3:31 AM

It's a real article, R151.

by Anonymousreply 152November 2, 2018 4:58 AM

Not only is it a real article, R151, but the author of the article came here to finger wag and lecture to the rest of us over it in another thread (that went to 600 posts - linked at R75).

by Anonymousreply 153November 2, 2018 6:11 PM

Their clothes are so shitty and tacky.

by Anonymousreply 154November 2, 2018 6:15 PM

Yeah! I was in that thread telling Meredith that "cis" is a slur and he kept obfuscating and not answering my questions.

by Anonymousreply 155November 2, 2018 6:15 PM

I think they're tremendous r154!

by Anonymousreply 156November 2, 2018 6:16 PM

Not to hijack the thread, but nobody did androgyny like Grace Jones. So beautiful and so glamorous!

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by Anonymousreply 157November 2, 2018 6:26 PM

Excuse me, r157?

by Anonymousreply 158November 2, 2018 6:28 PM

Yeah I miss cool androgyny. Distant and defiant. Not this oversharing, bullying desperation.

by Anonymousreply 159November 2, 2018 8:04 PM

Androgyny can be sexy. Even drag can be sexy!

Dressing like a clown is never sexy.

by Anonymousreply 160November 2, 2018 9:22 PM
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