I'm think I'm being a selfish cunt and I need datalongue to confirm it

0/10

It's not a troll. I'm being serious.

I hate that term "to die for" in reference to food. I have eaten alot of good food, but there is no food that I would want to die for. Nope. Food is not to die for.

Your life sounds so hard OP, but see if you can manage to get through such turbulent times.

She took something without asking, you need to lay into her ass.

Did you purchase the original chicken that your sister used? If you didn't buy it, you're being a cunt. Even if you did buy it, you're being a cunt. Somebody died for crying out loud. Just go buy another chicken and get over it.

Do you guys think I'm being selfish?

Yes. And dull.

You're right r6 but you don't know my sister. She's the kind of person who rearranges your stuff around on a whim and refuses to apologize! I don't know how to explain.

Putting the self-congratulatory comment about your chicken salad abilities makes you look like a twat. In other words, you don't deserve a new chicken. You can live off your vanity instead.

Go to the supermarket and buy a roasted chicken, fool. Raw chicken is up for grabs, but a cooked chicken is dibbed.

Are you a woman, OP

Assuming the OP is for real, I understand his/her feelings. My family members would do the same thing. Let it go and don't bother preparing food for your family. The hell with them!

No r12

There's something worse that being a selfish cunt. It's being a boring cunt.

You sound poverty-stricken.

Are you parents not in the professions?

Sad.

This

Never

Happened

Why do you buy your own food if you are living at home? I think it was nice of your sister to make a meal for your family member.

Once i was having friends and family for dinner. I was making chicken. My awful SIL was staying with us at the time. She said, "I'll make a side we can have." OK. That's one less thing to worry about. I would make the chicken and a green salad.

So she made...chicken salad. As a side for chicken.

It wasn't as if she didn't know we were having chicken. She was staying with us when we planned what we'd have for the entree.

I understand that. Your sister is entitled.

Are you buying all your own food while staying with your parents, or do your parents buy your food? If the former, then yeah, it's like a roommate. If the latter, then you have no right to complain.

"I'm think I'm being a selfish cunt and I need datalongue to confirm it"

Consider it confirmed.

In which part of the USA do you live, OP?

Add some laxatives to her chicken pasta.

I think it is lovely that you wanted to prepare a meal for the family. Your sister is the cunt - and she should be kicked there. Hard. Do it, OP. And don't forget to report back.

Leave some more chicken around with LSD in it.

Is your name Julie OP?

I think you're being shellfish.

Is this some sort of allegorical story, like how the poem "oh rose though art sick" is really about VD and The Crucible is about Joe McCarthy's search for communists in Hollywood?

If so, is the chicken a stand in for unprotected sex?

Suburbs of Chicago r22

I bet your sister's chicken pasta tasted better than whatever you were making. I think you're jealous of her.

My sister ate the last of my pineapple.

And then she died.

Well I just had some chicken with lemon that a neighbor made for me.

She didn't use any salt, so it tasted like shit.

So hide the salt and your sister's covered-cunt dish will be inedible.

Insist your sister buy you another raw chicken and then put it between your knees!

Thanks, OP. I thought you might be from the Midwest.

OP - I got the runs from your infamous chicken salad. It isn't as good as you think.

What is your recipe, Op??

I don't do exact measurements but: diced chicken, celery, sweet onion, fresh dill, chopped parsley, mayonnaise, mustard, salt, and black pepper. I might add pecans and grapes or a little bit of sugar if I want it to be sweet.

R32 = attitude of gratitude

What kind of mayonnaise do you use, OP?

DL needs to know!

I want to know who the cousin of the cousin is. Technically, they're a stranger and you wouldn't actually know them, dead or alive. EXPLAIN YOURSELF, OP!

We need to know, OP. How did you react when you found this out? Did you sigh a massive dramatic sigh and then flounce back to your room on the verge of tears? Or did you throw an unholy tantrum there in the kitchen?

[quote] I painstaking set about preparing the last bit of chicken we had. I decided to cook it in the morning but left it unthawed in the refrigerator overnight.

Translation: I took the chicken out of the freezer and painstakingly put it in the refrigerator to thaw overnight.

OP, what exactly did you do to prepare the uncooked chicken? Nothing?

Is your sister's name Julie? She is such a cunt

OP's story doesn't withstand DL scrutiny. I feel cheated.

I'm thinking OP tenderized and seasomed the chicken.

Assuming you are for real, OP.... You didn't buy the chicken, did you. Your parents did. It didn't belong to you. Your sister didn't take anything from you. It belonged to the family and was used for the family. It is your parents who should be angry with you two eating them out of the damn house and home.

Also, you are an entitled ass with no actual problems.

You're correct r45. Whatever brand that's in the kitchen r39. The dead person is my cousin's cousin and yes technically they are a stranger. R42, I got really pissed when I saw her cooking and I huffed off when she explained herself. I don't plain on talking to her for the rest of the week. We'll both be leaving Saturday.

Were you and the chicken close OP? Was there a fragile emotional bond? Is there a dearth of chicken in your part of Poorsville (I'm assuming you live in poverty because you're lamenting the loss of a paltry piece of poultry). No? Then go buy another chicken.

I've never understood college students who go home for the summer, unless you live in the dorms. You're missing out on growing up.

How did you tenderize and sodomize an unthawed chicken, OP? This doesn't pass the smell test!

I live in dorms r49 and I might as well leech off my parents while it's still socially except able.

[quote]still socially except able.

Is this is what they're teaching you at your uni? Your language skills are unacceptable.

I want to marry R48.

Bitch, have you been doing an internship this summer? Cuz your chicken salad making skills aren't going to land you a motherfucking job after graduation!

Not one word of OP's post sounds like it was written by someone under 40.

In fairness to Mary OP, there has been a years-long severe shortage of chicken in any form throughout the Chicago suburbs. It's been reported in all the newspapers and television stations.

OP, chickens come and go, but your sister is forever.

Today is my twin sister's birthday, and I thank God every day that I never let a chicken salad come between us.

That's a lesson you won't learn in Uni!

(1) Place Satin shoes in large cloth bag. (2) Deliver with it a fatal blow. (3) Bury corpse in neighbor's yard.

R52, you must have missed the DL Rule that saying "uni" is trashy and low class.

Please get it together.

Oh honey, don't belittle yourself, leave that to us. Yes, you're an asshole and a selfish cunt.

OP, siblings are friends with whom you go through life! Don't fuck it up! I want you to go find your sister and give her a big creepy hug right now! Then I want you to go make her a chicken salad sandwich and quit your bitchin'! Capeesh?

Happy birthday, R56

Oh, R61, you remembered! I'm speechless, thank you!

Unless that cousin's cousin is a cousin by marriage, then that cousin is your cousin too.

Jeez...

So...you make chicken salad the same way everyone else does, but, you somehow think it's special because you've been taught that everything you do is special, unique and wonderful. The one unique thing you seem to do is season frozen chicken. That's a new idea. A stupid one, but, new.

Let's break this down.

1. Your chicken salad recipe is banal and jejune.

2. You prepare the chicken frozen.

3. You didn't buy the chicken because you're a mooch college kid.

4. Your sister did something nice for a stranger's family, thereby thinking of other people.

5. That's pissed you off because the concept of generosity doesn't mesh with your world view of, "what about meeeeee? Where's the praise for meeeeee? I'm special."

6. You're a pouty, whiny baby who feels cheated because his mommy and daddy didn't get to make yummy sounds about the chicken salad you didn't make, thereby affirming your fragile ego.

7. You didn't get to post pictures of the unmade salad online for your friends to praise you for having one, single life skill.

8. Your sister, meanwhile, still offered a kind gesture of condolence for a very distant, unknown family member. She is rightfully going to get the praise and attention you desperately need.

9. So, you will passive-aggressively pout and give her the silent treatment until someone notices and asks, "What's wrong, baby?"

9. You will reply, "nothing."

10. You'll do this several times until you break down, snotty-nosed and sobbing, with, "It's just..." Like a four year old.

11. You'll regale the family with your tale of woe and chicken-cheating and....

12. Get the attention you wanted, thereby feeling the victor and special again.

13. Nonetheless, your sister still did something altruistic while you...

14. ...are still a mooch, selfish, whining crybaby and...

15. ...a cunt.

Ergo, you are a typical millennial.

Nicely done, R64.

ZzzZzz and OP types like he's 50. First give away.

[quote] R63: Unless that cousin's cousin is a cousin by marriage, then that cousin is your cousin too.

Your cousin's cousins might actually be your own siblings, but I'm guessing this is not what is meant here. Using examples to illustrate:

Your cousin may be you father's sister's son.

That child's cousin might be his mother's brother's daughter.

That daughter would be a stranger to you. There'd be no blood relation. You would probably never even be in the same room with this person except for a wedding or funeral, and if that, you would still probably not even be introduced. I don't think I have every been in the same room with any of my cousins' cousins.

Capeesh?

Chicken salad is fucking gross, so I'm siding with sis. At least SHE has balls...

Why didn't you just create a poll, then your cuntiness would have been verified mathematically?

So how does OP even know his cousin's cousin? Unless you're Catholics in a small town, I can't figure how you even know each other.

I heart r64 and r69. And OP's sister too.

R63, I am a cousin on the father's side while the other cousin is a cousin on the mother's side.

R64 hurt my feelings :(

I met my cousin's cousin (my aunt married his uncle) at a family wedding before my freshman year in college. We ended up living on the same dorm floor that fall. Was very weird.

This thread made me giggle.

Bump for more chicken salad cuntiness.

I haven't laughed this hard in a while.

OP, I may be the one person siding with you. I don't care who bought and paid for that chicken, you obviously had plans for it as evidenced by your painstaking efforts the night before at some point between freezer and fridge. So FUCK HER, how dare she steal your not thawed chicken in the morning (it would take longer to thaw that's why this whole story is bullshit) and make some stupid ass carb-heavy dish?! She should apologize and repent immediately.

I hope you told EVERYONE at the funeral about this awful problem.

Well, it's not like it was a wheel of Red Dragon Cheese or anything.

Or a can of frosting

I'm dying to know what colleges these two dingbats attend.

[quote] R74: My first college roommate...

My college roommate & I ended the school year as boyfriends.

He eventually wound-up marrying a woman who I previously had dated.

His brother eventually worked for my father.

He went to Law School in the same class as my brother.

How's that for coincidences?

I'm at Georgetown r8, she goes to state school.

I hope you have tuition grants (not loans) for Georgetown, because its not worth the money, and you seem kind of an idiot. Your sister as usual has good sense and does the right thing.

Are you majoring in the culinary arts at Georgetown? Because you'd never make it on that Gordon Ramsey show.

Your sister, however would win. She cut corners by stealing your already defrosted and prepared chicken. AND looks like a hero for preparing the food.

Is your sister's name Julie?

R63, you March right in here and apologize to r73!

What did I do wrong?

Oops, r64 not r63

What part, exactly , of R64's post hurt your feelings, OP?

[quote] Is there a dearth of chicken in your part of Poorsville (I'm assuming you live in poverty because you're lamenting the loss of a paltry piece of poultry).

LOL

OP, you are a cunt, yes

I see no alternative but to stick a frozen chicken in the casket during the viewing. The next day, when it's thawed, demand your sister whip up your "to die for" chicken salad at the gravesite with the thawed bird.

And absolutely everyone is glossing over the inconsiderate fuck who managed to die just as I was preparing to make my to die for chicken salad!

I assume a datalongue is a fainting couch.

Go to Trader Joes and spend $6 and change and get a whole bag of frozen chicken. Put your name on the bag and make your chicken salad tomorrow.

OP used uncooked chicken to prepare a chicken salad?

OP, yes you are a cunty millennial.

Please report back on what everyone thought of your cunty sister's Frozen Chicken Over Pasta dish.

What a drab little recipe.

Her chicken would have to be better than yours, R37. Mayonnaise, onion, and sugar. This time of year, a vinaigrette is what's called for. Onion is awful. Sugar is insane.

Your sister was saving all your other cousins from certain death since your chicken sald is "to die for."

Your sister is a thief and can't be trusted. You learned an important life lesson early.

Did that cousin of a cousin eat your chicken salad because it's to die for? Maybe that's what killed the cousin of a cousin.

Your recipe sounds, well, ordinary, OP. Sounds like Panera's chicken salad but not as good. You must live a very isolated life. And if that is the extent of your problems, so much so that you think it's appropriate to punish your sister by silence for the rest of the week, you are one entitled kid. I advise that you broaden your horizons, both in a culinary and prospective way.

OP, I like you but "death" does strange things to people. You can't take death related hubbub to heart.

If you are writing like a bitter old queen / cunt and you're in college, God only knows what kind of a mess you turn out to be.

OP, are you talking to your sister yet? Or is it still the silent cuntery?

I'll have two chicken breasts, please.

Have you bought another chicken OP? Or will this cousin-heavy family be deprived of your to-die-for frozen chicken salad with sugar?

R64

You rock! Also, OP....after 24 hours, you are still a cunt.

Is datalongue the Georgetown cousin of the chaise longue?

Oh, Poo (OP), these recent food-based fabrications are certainly a pleasant diversion from your usual scatological flingings. Why don't you use eggs (which never existed) that you claim to have stolen from a supermarket (which doesn't exist) while those ethnic cashiers were staring at you, and make your (pretend) egg salad instead?

No water chestnuts in your chicken salad recipe , OP ? Not only are you a selfish cunt , your boring .

And "your" a bad cook, R113.

WHET tinned crabbed salad on white?

"Crabbed salad"?

R114 Take "your' and "you're" and shove them right up your prolapsed anus Miss Thing .

OP, I'm glad I hurt your feelings because maybe you'll recognize the truth in what I wrote. My assessment is true. Isn't it? You crave attention and need to feel special. That reality is what hurt your feelings. Yes? Or maybe you're hurt because it was so easy for a stranger to figure you out and see through the magic cloud of "specialness" you've had sprayed around you all your life. Well, here's some more truth. As you go through life, worse things than a pilfered (for good) chicken will happen to you. Many of the them. If you approach everything with the same selfish, snotty, adolescent attitude you display here, you will suffer all the more. If you grow up and realize there are worse things than hurt feelings, maybe you will have a chance. You're no more special than anyone else. Life doesn't care about you or your chicken salad. It'll just keep going anyway.

OP - Anytime you need DL to confirm that you are a selfish cunt, please consider yourself pre-confirmed.

(pssst! R118! OP is our resident, passive aggressive, racist demon with a heart of brown, Miss. Poo Shoes herself. Everything you said about her is true, and confirms her identity.)

I don't think OP is Poo Shoes.

Poo likes scatt. This chicken wasn't marinated with dripping diarhea orw chiken poop so no not dumbvida

Regarding the sister-in-law who made chicken salad as a side dish for chicken, did you ask her how she arrived at that choice?

Ask for the OP, he needs to confront his sister about this for his own sake, not that he'll expect an apology.

She still hasn't gotten more chicken from the store and she drank all of the fucking milk!

You can't be a passive-aggressive mooch and be picky, OP/r124. You get what you get whenever mommy and daddy get it for you. If you want more chicken and milk (milk...really?...are you 12?) go to the store, use the credit card your mommy and daddy pay for, and get some more. Make sure to use the car your parents bought for you, the gas they buy for you, and wear the nicest clothes they gave you. Then, you'll have MORE. It won't really be yours because you didn't actually earn it, but, you could expend some energy in procuring it. Unless you are blind or limbless, going to the store is within your power. Actually, it still would be within your power even if you were limbless or blind. There are ways for even the most disabled to get their own food. Can you imagine how insufferable you'd be if you ever had a REAL problem? Do you know what "insufferable" means?

Going to the store is HARD!

Wait, she bought it and no one told me?

OP will be arrested for murdering his sister. Watch for headlines in "the suburbs of Chicago."

GO TO THE STORE, OP. Seriously, what is stoppng you?

I have a review exam for a two part series course. I'm studying for it plus I'm getting myself ready for the weekend. I don't have time to go to the store.

OP has quite clearly confused us with people who give a fuck.

R130 Oh for fuck sakes SHUT UP OP! I can't wait for a real life crisis to kick you in the twat. OP would you please start a new thread about how small your dick is.

Does eating too much chicken cause yellow skin?

So if you're so pushed for time r130 when were you going to be able to spend those precious moments assembling your mayonnaise and sugar chicken?

Good grief. You created a thread about this?

Go to the store and buy some fresh chicken and make your salad.

If you are petty about this, you will not handle a job very well and cope with serious life challenges.

This.

Never.

Happened.

Nom nom nom nom...I live off of attention. Nom nom nom nom it's tastier than my shitty sugary chicken salaaaaaaaaaaaaad that is to die for! Nom nom nom.

I thought chicken salad was hospital/cafeteria food

I don't really add sugar you guys, it's my sister who likes it that way.

Shouldn't you be studying, John?

R139 OP I like how everything is your sister's "fault". Please tell me that you and your sister are twins and you are the younger one and were too timid to kill her in the womb. So now you have built up resentment. Would you also pull and Jan and stomp around the house in a huff saying "Marcia Marcia Marcia!!!"

R130, it's Tuesday. What the fuck does getting ready for the weekend mean? On Tuesday?

You can't take half an hour from "studying" (I.e. Texting, selfies, looking in the mirror, feeling "like so sad and angry, you guys, like s-angry cuz my life sucks so hard right now", mooching, whining and having everything done for you in your parents' house) to go to the fucking store for your itty-bitty baby milk.

Seriously, what the fuck does 'getting ready for the weekend" mean?

Are you laying out your clothes, picking which boat shoes to wear with your red skinny-leg pants?

You're not only a cunt and a crybaby, you are an idiot and a twat. Lazy, dim, shallow, petulant, arrogant, childish and, as I said before "insufferable."

I wish you nothing but harm and trauma. I wish you illness and hunger. How could you possibly cope with anything real? Life will devour you. Devour.

Being young is not an achievement, it's simply a passing biological state through which all living things must pass. You're not special. You're nothing. You won't even last past your twenties.

You will be devoured.

I trust I've hurt your feelings again. I truly hope so.

The "it's poo shoes" troll and the "it's John" troll should take it outside and leave us to have our fun here. I don't know why they think it matters who started a thread, if others are enjoying it.

Agreed r143. Nobody is seriously believing anyone is so pathetic as to be whining about who used the groceries mom and dad bought but it's fun pulling him down. All round family entertainment.

R142 = Betty Broderick

Ha! R145. I did just watch both Betty Broderick movies a couple of days ago. Maybe they moved me more than I realized.

I imagine that chicken boy is "doing it" with the "dog meat" on the stairs right now.

What's wrong with boat shoes, R142?

You sound poor. All WASPs wear boat shoes.

You must be an angry, poverty-stricken Catholic.

No, dear, boat shoes are gauche unless one is actually on a yacht. They're a costume for the nouveau riche or for the middle class losers who get a pity invitation to the country club and want to "fit in." They're the footwear of heterosexual men with sagging stomachs and twinks with over-inflated ideas of their very fleeting value.

Is "unthawed" a word? I don't think so but if it is, it would be frozen. Perhaps OP meant thawed.

Oh the horror! He ... he ... was wearing deck shoes!

Unthawed in that instance actually makes sense to me, as he was expecting it to be thawed by the next day. Saying frozen wouldn't be quite the same thing, I don't think, although I understand your point.

ugh, i hate people like that. growing up, my mother would always do that and it always pissed me off. she's a fat frau and if i bought some chocolate, i'd have to hide it from her or she'd "have an attack" and eat it, then refuse to admit she did anything wrong.

my advice is, every time your sister takes something from you, take something from her. that's what i had to do with my mom, every time she took something of mine, i'd just go and take some of her food.

R148, you're so wrong, it's funny.

R152, that's passive aggressive. I don't think it's a good idea. Maybe once to make a point. After that, it's warlike and fruitless, I think.

R152 doesn't apply because the chicken didn't even belong to OP

R148 = flyover state bottom with delusions of grandeur. Topeka's own Mr. Blackswell.

Every preppy kid has been wearing Sperrys since the 1960s, maybe earlier. I have pictures of my dad and his friends at Andover in the early 70s with them on. You just never want to be seen with new ones.

And fuck, OP. Get a life. Find something to care about other than what your sister does with your chicken. She takes it because she knows it bothers the fuck out of you.

I'm breaking in a pair now, R156. I usually wear the pair before when I go out.

R154 you sound like a doormat, you can't just let people walk all over you like that and take whatever they want, whenever they want with no consequences. she started it, the sister taking the chicken in the first place without asking is passive aggressive, you have to fight fire with fire.

"This is so like her, she takes what she wants without asking and redirects it so I look like an asshole."

Regardless of whatever other shit you are getting on here about chicken or whatever, that statement above perfectly describes my relationship with my sister -- and almost every man I know seems to have one nutcase bitch sister that they are either dealing with or wrote off a long time. I am about to embark on the latter choice myself. Enough. I'm happy with my two brothers. Drama fucking free.

Hang in there, OP. Trivial or not, I get how you feel.

OP made himself look like the asshole all by herself

you're doing everything right, OP, don't let the haters fool you.

[quote]the sister taking the chicken in the first place without asking is passive aggressive

Where I come from, stealing someone else's food is just regular aggressive.

How dare she steal that which OP already stole!

Do families living together in one house--parents and (in this case grown) children--have a "your food" versus "my food" mentality? I don't understand this. If anything, all the food belongs to the parents and is used to feed the family. It's not like living with roommates.

Regardless, OP comes off as the loser here. I still want an explanation of how and why he needs to begin "preparing for the weekend" on Tuesday. How much planning is required for trolling Grindr for a dick to suck in his mother's borrowed minivan? Is he sorting each grain of body glitter by specific hue and saturation?

Has anyone watched Jessica Jones? OP and his sister are probably like the twins on that show.

I live at home after college for a while. I didn't buy much in the way of food myself, but if I didn't eat what my mother cooked, I was welcome to go out somewhere at my own expense instead, which usually only happened when she made broccoli quiche.

Way to ruin a nice quiche, R167.

I have R166 and i agree with you

I'm baffled trying to imagine my brother making chicken salad himself. He never does anything himself if he could possibly get someone else to do it for him, so he would have gotten my mother to make it instead.

I hate broccoli with a passion, the smell of it makes me gag. My mom is very much into just making what everybody else will eat, so she won't have to hear any complaints, but once in a great while she would make that anyway.

Same here, R170. When the family gets together for holidays, my brother still talks my sisters into ironing his clothes before he goes out with friends.

All are in their 30s.

Lee. Painstaking Lee. Where all u grammar bitches be at? Fer shur that would have been at the top of this pathetic pollo ensalada thread.

Great news guys! I took your advice and I forgave my sister. We're getting pedicures to celebrate!

Sugar in chicken salad? No wonder we have an obesity problem in America.

Well, what do you folks put in your chicken salad? Granted, the idea of adding extra sugar itself doesn't interest me. I hate celery.

R173, yay!

Many things can accompany chicken r175 but sugar isn't one of them. Ever tried Coronation Chicken? It's a retro type thing but very tasty - NO sugar in sight.

Tell your sister you were saving that chicken breast to wrap around your cock and jack off, she will never touch your chicken again.

I make lots of different chicken salads. The big thing is to not overcook the chicken breasts. I usually use skin-off/bone-in and slow-poach them (bring water to a boil, then turn off, then place chicken breasts in). If I make a lot, I usually roast them, and use bone-in/skin on.

One I like is with mayo, curry powder (saute in oil, don't just add to mayo), celery, pecans, and mango chutney. Sliced cooked carrots go well with this.

Another has a 1/2-mayo/1/2-sour cream base, with tons of chopped parsley, basil, tarragon, and dill, to which you can add nuts or grapes if you like. I made it once with pineapple and it was surprisingly good.

I make another with a very mustardy vinaigretts.

And then there's Chinese chicken salad, using that same mustard vinaigrette, which I finish with a bit of dark sesame oil, plus garlic, peanuts, hot chili, and cilantro. Water chestnuts would work, though I don't really like them.

Um, under the circumstances, grow some balls and give your sister a pass. I tend to be thin-skinned, too, but ... really!?

Yeah, give her a pass and just wait. This is just the one before the next one. And the next. Trust me. The monster grows.

Who do you think the monster is r181? The grown man whining because his sister used groceries his parents bought to make a dish for bereaved people?

So, OP, have you made your to-die-for chicken salad yet? If not, you should. That way everyone will be upset they didn't get to eat it at the funeral and were stuck with your sister's poor excuse for a meal. Since it's so delicious, this is what will happen.

All this strife over chicken.

Can't you buy another chicken?

[quote]I'm home for the summer from college

Stop right there.

Yes you are a selfish cunt.

You are a selfish cunt in more ways than can be counted.

The bitch never bought me a new chicken

Since it’s Christmas, you should ask for a plump Christmas goose instead.

Did you ask to speak with the manag...ah...your mommy?

Two year old thread.

It's time to move on.

"I'll Forgive But I'll Never Forget" ~ Don Williams

ESTs have to be entertaining. This fails even our minimum standards. Go watch Julie Brown’s “Homecoming Queens Got A Gun!” until you can amp this pettiness into humor.

Oh, Grasshopper! You must turn the page!

I like OP’s thread,it makes me think of Summer & long warm days. I bet that salad would be so good on toast points, with an iced tea.

A general rule in most families is that sisters will always be bossy, bitchy and dominate their brothers. We usually let them get away with it.

On the plus side, I can trust my sister to leave my house sparkling clean and tidy when she visits me every summer. And she leaves a month’s worth of prepared food in the freezer.

R187 Maybe you ought to buy her something. Treat others the way you want to be treated and all that.

Cut her face real good, so nobody will ever want her again. Make sure you tell her that was just a warning too. Fucking sister bitch.

What is "chicken"?

Wow OP. Thanks for the update......3 years later.

R191. A group in college did "Homecoming Queen" as a skit for a charity talent show. They won.