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Gay men who don't go to the gym

It's surprising to see a lot of guys who clearly don't give a shit, even in NYC. Even more surprising with someone like Kevin Spacey who you'd think would be more vain as an actor but clearly looking tight and athletic isn't a concern of his.

by Anonymousreply 222Last Tuesday at 2:39 AM

Maybe men are starting to realize the truth. Wit and adequate dick trumps muscles and money. Things I can't say in front of my roommate because I might hurt his precious feelings.

*rolls eyes*

by Anonymousreply 105/16/2016

How is this surprising? You honestly expect that every gay man would go live in the gym?!

by Anonymousreply 205/16/2016

Over worked out bodies don't look so good on the older guy.

by Anonymousreply 305/16/2016

Going to the gym is quite possibly the most boring and soul-crushing things a person can do.

by Anonymousreply 405/16/2016

R2 - "would go live in the gym?!" Going to the gym for an hour a day is not living at the gym. Wow, do people find your hysterics annoying?

by Anonymousreply 505/16/2016

R4 Keep saying that to yourself, fatass.

by Anonymousreply 605/16/2016

The sexiest bodies are strong from doing man's work...not pushing machines up and down.

by Anonymousreply 705/16/2016

No more so than your humble-bragging surprise that others--gasp--don't have the same values as you.

by Anonymousreply 805/16/2016

[R7] Blue collar work is not sexy

by Anonymousreply 905/16/2016

No dear r5, surprisingly enough most people understand basic hyperbole...

Thanks for your asperger-esque correction, I'm sure everyone was confused that I meant they literally had to live in a gym.

by Anonymousreply 1005/16/2016

My boyfriend and I loll about with our perfectly adequate bodies in complete domestic bliss - there's more to life than a hard ass, people

by Anonymousreply 1105/16/2016

After decades of going to gyms and experiencing the lack of human emotion, interaction or anything remotely approaching "pleasant" people, I totally agree with R4. Yeah, working out is healthy and a toned, somewhat (not BIG muscles) muscular body is physically attractive...but it sure isn't fun. At least at public gyms. I got over watching the eye candy decades ago since I realized those troglodytes strut around preening and primping and most have the personality of dryer lint. With IQs to match. Not all, of course. But the gym has NEVER been fun for me. I have done it and continue to go (sometimes I just go out for a run or use weights I have at home because I can't stand the thought of the energy and atmosphere of those places.) It doesn't matter how they advertise them or how cheap the rates are or how "gorgeous" all those bodybuilders are. It's soul draining. Perhaps because it is a place where nothing BUT the physical is worshipped and that is only a part of the human experience.

by Anonymousreply 1205/16/2016

Invitation to Hell bitches!

by Anonymousreply 1305/16/2016

Gym obsession is a mental illness.

by Anonymousreply 1405/16/2016

I've always thought a little definition and tone is much sexier than the over-muscled gym bunny look.

by Anonymousreply 1505/16/2016

LOL these replies are so DL. Nobody here is under 30% bodyfat, OP dear. Post somewhere else like or reddit. Here, ask your question at the link and then we can compare replies.

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by Anonymousreply 1605/16/2016

Gay men who say "dear" are creepy. First, you exaggerate like some old Boys in the Band queen and now you're calling people "dear". Yick.

by Anonymousreply 1705/16/2016

Calm down R17 / OP ... take your Deca dose down a notch. You ARE posting on the wrong forum if you want to ask users about gym habits of average gay men. On this site, for any 1 exercise thread, there are 100 food and TV watching threads. Not to mention, can't you tell by the replies that this is the wrong place to ask? I was hardly exaggerating by the 30% body fat comment. The one time there was a thread asking people to post their real weight and/or waist size, it had maybe 5 replies (from people in the normal range) and 800 views...on and 2 people were honest and said they were overweight.

by Anonymousreply 1805/16/2016

OP doesn't want an answer, so he won't ask reddit. He just wants to bitch at everyone for assaulting his delicate eyes with their >28" waists....or assaulting his mind by the use of the word "dear" - How DEAR you!!??

OP is a delicate flower, with overdone muscles to conceal that fact.

by Anonymousreply 1905/16/2016

How dear you? Lol.

by Anonymousreply 2005/16/2016

R18, please. People didn't post their weight and waist size because this is not high school and WHO GIVES A SHIT? Why would anyone care to post that shit even if he had a bodybuilder physique? It was a sophomoric stupid ass thread to begin with. Anyone who would take the time to POST to it life.

I have no idea what kind of shape most DL posters are in and don't give a flying fuck. I don't think most posters care. We all don't know each other, have no idea what anyone looks like or where he/she is posting from. And don't care. But I would bet most are in some sort of average range and NOT obese fatasses.

by Anonymousreply 2105/16/2016

R21, how many calories does unhinged, irrational anger burn?

by Anonymousreply 2205/16/2016

Rolls of fat

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by Anonymousreply 2305/16/2016

"Unhinged?" "Irrational?" Really? R22? THAT is your takeaway from my post? Wow.

by Anonymousreply 2405/16/2016

Clearly, he only goes to the gym for the locker room.

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by Anonymousreply 2505/16/2016

When all you've got is good looks,

You've got nothing when they're gone.

by Anonymousreply 2605/16/2016

This is the goal.

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by Anonymousreply 2705/16/2016

Why don't you just surround yourself with muscle queens, since you give a shit?

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by Anonymousreply 2805/16/2016

Exactly R2. I know a lot of gay men who do go to gyms but not everyone does. I know gay men who went to gyms a lot when they were young and who still do sometimes go but they do get busy with life and work.

by Anonymousreply 2905/16/2016

trashy and common people go to the gym. Classy people swim.

by Anonymousreply 3005/16/2016

Kevin Spacey wouldn't care about being tight and athletic. He only cares about his boys being tight and athletic.

by Anonymousreply 3105/16/2016

I pay my whores to do the working out for me.

by Anonymousreply 3205/16/2016

Why wouldn't you try to look like this? You feel better about yourself if nothing else. If you look good, you feel good.

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by Anonymousreply 3305/16/2016

Kevin Spacey is pushing 60. You seriously expect a guy that old to look like a gym rat?

by Anonymousreply 3405/16/2016

[quote]But I would bet most are in some sort of average range and NOT obese fatasses.

Not to trigger you further, R24, but you do know that "average" in America is overweight, right? Average Height: 5 feet 9 inches / Weight: 195.5 pounds. As you get older, it gets worse, and DL is not a young forum based on the majority of the content. Also, as someone already stated, there are 100 food threads for every 1 exercise / TV thread on DL. So, why would anyone ask about "gay men who don't go to the gym" on DL is beyond me. This forum is probably Average + 10-20% fat based purely on interests, age, and the abundance of complaint threads about looks, mental illness, lack of social life, etc. These aren't typically the people who go to the gym. (And actually that answers OPs question! Interests, age, social life, other priorities, and mental illness / motivation struggles)

I think any internet forum would be skewed, though, if you're trying to get an assessment of why people do or do not have more physical activity. Redditors are going to be the same as here...most of the people on the reddit thread linked are people who play video games all day.

by Anonymousreply 3505/16/2016

But you are answering the question rr35. While there are some gay men who work out on a regular basis, obviously lots and lots of people do not.

I mean OP's "surprise" that there are gay guys who don't work out regularly is silly.

[quote]Why wouldn't you try to look like this? You feel better about yourself if nothing else. If you look good, you feel good.

Inaction is easier than action. Duh.

by Anonymousreply 3605/16/2016

[quote] I mean OP's "surprise" that there are gay guys who don't work out regularly is silly.

I'm guessing its feigned as well. OP just wants to feel superior about it in order to validate his excessive time in the gym.

by Anonymousreply 3705/16/2016

[quote]Why wouldn't you try to look like this? You feel better about yourself if nothing else. If you look good, you feel good.

And then you post a picture of an actor, whose JOB it is to keep himself looking that way, and has the kind of assistance most people can't afford. They also routinely use steroids as an assist (how else do they suddenly gain "40 pounds of muscle" for some stupid superhero movie?).

Most gay men have body dysmorphia, and wouldn't know "health" if it smacked them in the face with its dick.

by Anonymousreply 3805/16/2016

There are plenty of non-actors spamming Instagram/Tumblr who look that good and better, R38.

by Anonymousreply 3905/16/2016

Grow up, child.

by Anonymousreply 4005/16/2016

[quote] Wit and adequate dick trumps muscles and money.

I want to live where you live...but I'm afraid of tornadoes.

by Anonymousreply 4105/16/2016

We've seen enough David Harris Instgram selfies by now to know that the gym doesn't necessarily make the gay gentleman of a certain age all that appealing.

by Anonymousreply 4205/16/2016

I hear a lot of excuses. Most guys I know are trying very hard to eat well and exercise for a variety of reasons. Is it so hard for some of you to stop eating sweets and start lifting weights for a half hour a day? Don't talk about average Americans because the bar is much higher for gay men and you should be proud we have a higher standard for everything.

by Anonymousreply 4305/16/2016

R35 Thank you for this revelation.

98% of the posters on this website are not someone that I would notice in real life.....fat, mentally ill losers.

I think I wont post anymore, but, since I have a nasty sense of humor, occasionally lurk to see the losers get themselves all worked up over celebrities who are way outta their league.

by Anonymousreply 4405/16/2016

[quote]98% of the posters on this website are not someone that I would notice in real life

You seem particularly cheap. You fit in here far more than you yet realise.

by Anonymousreply 4505/16/2016

Seriously, where's the site for gay guys who care about what they look like and live in apartments with a view?

by Anonymousreply 4605/16/2016


by Anonymousreply 4705/16/2016

I have to admit I too am baffled by the amount of slothfulness of the men on here. Maybe it's because I was athletic as a kid, but it's always been a great form of stress release for me and I get antsy if I can't do something for a few days.

That said, I don't usually go to "the gym"-- I run, ride my bike, work out with dumbbells at home, take yoga classes... I can see how going to a typical gym with treadmills and weight machines could get boring in a hurry though.

by Anonymousreply 4805/16/2016

I love sex..

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by Anonymousreply 4905/16/2016

I'm opening a gay bar and calling it The Gym. That way I can tell people I go to "the gym".

by Anonymousreply 5005/16/2016

The gym gets old very fast when your results are essentially 2 lb of muscle over 6 months (though on frau weight loss boards, they always attribute their "random weight gain at the gym" to muscle gain... as if it were only that easy).

Also, with regard to fat loss, cutting out 300 calories of food per day a day is much easier than running 2-3 miles to burn that amount. So, that's a big reason it feels like a waste of time to a lot of people.

by Anonymousreply 5105/16/2016

I don't mind people who don't exercise but for the love of God, if you look like a sack of potatoes don't hit on the gym guys and stop trolling for big pecs in dating apps. How delusional can you get??

by Anonymousreply 5205/16/2016

They're playing the numbers game, R52. For every 100 that ignore them, 1 will be into chubs.

by Anonymousreply 5305/16/2016

" should be proud we have a higher standard for everything. "

Except for internet commenting, apparently. R43.

by Anonymousreply 5405/16/2016

R53 That is what the over 60 yo pervs think will happen when they hit on teens. Problem is that it's not 1 in a 100 but more like 1 in 10.000. And honestly if someone needs to hit 100 different guys to get a hookup in grindr he should do some serious introspection, or join tumblr and proclaim he is "asexual".

by Anonymousreply 5505/16/2016

I go to the gym because I can't really afford an entirely new wardrobe. But, at 36 w/o much sex drive - I don't really know if I care anymore. It would be easier just to be fat and stop lifting weights....and eat whatever I wanted. I'm on the fence.

by Anonymousreply 5605/16/2016

I actually am a "fatass" but I have a sense of humor, I can carry on a conversation, I'm intelligent and I have a big dick. I get laid as often as I want to. The gym holds no appeal for me, nor do the shallow losers who haunt them. If you enjoy the gym, good for you but if you had any brains or emotional capacity, you would know that not everyone has the same priorities. Obsessive behaviors are off-putting in general, but the gym obsessives are among the worst.

by Anonymousreply 5705/16/2016

R57, thank you.

by Anonymousreply 5805/16/2016

This site is interesting. You are either heavy set or have had bariatric surgery (as a number of people here have admitted to having) which is clinically obese, or you are an 8 or higher in looks. There is no in the middle here.

by Anonymousreply 5905/16/2016

I'd FAR rather be friends w/ R57 than a vapid gym queen. I actually have very few "gym regular" friends - maybe one or two. I think it's a cultish / competition thing - like how high school girls encourage anorexia in each other. I'm never going to be at their level, but I am attempting to just not spiral into morbid obesity which my body seems to want to do lately.

by Anonymousreply 6005/16/2016

The gym is inspiring. I love being surrounded by a lot of hot, attractive people who are improving their physiques and fitness. It's gymspiration

by Anonymousreply 6105/17/2016

Yeah-when you put it that way, I am totally gym jonesing for some gymspiration! LOL

by Anonymousreply 6205/17/2016

That is why ninety percent of gay men die alone. Sex eventually isn't everything, but good companionship can be. None of will be hot and desirable forever, that is a fact of life. Nor will the gym always be the most important part of life. I prefer walkie and hiking with my partner.

by Anonymousreply 6305/17/2016

It's much more than sex. Working out is great for the mind, soul, and body. Of course, you don't have to only work out in the gym, but for most of us it is the best way to get regular exercise.

by Anonymousreply 6405/17/2016

R57 - I know people just like you. Too many. The loud guy who makes bitter, snarky comments and has convinced himself that he's witty. That big dick probably hasn't gotten any air since the last time you saw it when you were 20. It's so rich for a self-described "fatass" to slam obsessive personalities when you're a glutton.

by Anonymousreply 6505/17/2016

R57, why are you still sleeping around like a stunted man child? Haven't you managed to find someone to settle down with and love you unconditionally by now?

by Anonymousreply 6605/17/2016

R57 and R60 at lunch together, best friends forever. Can you imagine the bill for that? Going to a gym does not make you vapid. It shows you respect yourself and want to be healthy. What is the damage to your mind that you can't see that?

by Anonymousreply 6705/17/2016

R57 You sound awfuly delusional and unaware.

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by Anonymousreply 6805/17/2016

I can't help but figure the people posting in this thread outraged by the sheer concept of people hitting the gym for looks and health look and think like Trigglypuff

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by Anonymousreply 6905/17/2016

Is anyone outraged? There is a lot of great reasons to go to the gym, you will be healthier, look better, and get a lot more sex.

But not every gay guy is going to prioritize their free time with going to the gym. I just don't care that much at this point.

I treat to eat healthy and stay active, but I don't even have a gym membership right now.

by Anonymousreply 7005/17/2016

If you really love the type of workout you get at a gym, that's fine. But you're much more likely to get the exercise you need doing something you actually enjoy. Also not living in fear that if you don't have the perfectly chiseled body you will die alone in the gutter. Fuck that.

by Anonymousreply 7105/17/2016

I really don't get where you couch potatoes get this bizarre idea that everybody in the gyms look like fitness models. You seem to spend way too much time perving after the fit boys in instagram.

Out of some very specific places like Gold's Gym, most gyms are mixed places with people of all ages and physiques. Stop pretending they are an exclusionary environment where everybody is out to judge you. You seem to be making up excuses to justify your own sedentarism.

by Anonymousreply 7205/17/2016

I was actually called out once for casually looking around the room when I was trying out a NYSC on the UWS. "Are you looking for something?" Rude conceited jerks who think they are unattainable because they have some muscles. Clearly they are deficent where it counts-between the ears.

by Anonymousreply 7305/17/2016

Deficient. I need a break from this exhausting thread. LOL

by Anonymousreply 7405/17/2016

R73 I can guarantee that you were:

1. Ogling the hot guys non stop

2. Not working out very hard, if at all

3. Were and are, fat

No wonder the gym regulars were hostile to you. The hot guys who take of themselves are not objects to be stared at by prurient fugs.

by Anonymousreply 7505/17/2016

If you're REALLY serious about hitting the gym, make sure you're properly attired!

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by Anonymousreply 7605/17/2016

Not everybody wants to go to the gym and there is nothing wrong with that. Personally, I try to take long walks, stretch, try some yoga, and some at home workouts. I'm also eating more veggies and slowly phasing out junk food. I might not be turning heads since I'm still overweight (5'9' 175 lbs) but I am gradually making healthier choices.

A lot of gays here don't like super ripped guys because they seem intimidating and remind them of the jocks that gave them hell in high school. I used to have flashbacks to being teased for my weight by the athletes whenever I see any muscular guys. They don't happen now that I'm focusing on loving myself instead of worrying about what other people think about me or how they live their lives.

But now that I'm older, I've realized that this is my life, and the only standards I need to meet are mine. Luckily, mine are very low. Because, it doesn't matter if you die with a six-pack or a gut, Hell will still burn just as hot for you!

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by Anonymousreply 7705/17/2016

I go to a "glorified gym," aka a health club (tennis courts, squash courts, swimming pool, spa facilities in addition to a gym), outside of New York. More straight than gay. It offers plenty of opportunities to socialize and make friends. There are a fair number of jerks, muscle heads, and Olympian-wannabes who preen and pose...especially love the ones who lift their shirts to examine their abs. Do gyms attract narcissists more than any other place today? I don't think so. Facebook, snapchat, and twitter attract just as many.

I go there to relieve stress, keep healthy, and socialize.

by Anonymousreply 7805/17/2016

I guarantee you are a moron I would walk away from mid-sentence asshole. Like I said for those troglodytes with poor reading comprehension, I was new there and checking out the equipment, layout of the rooms on multiple floors as well as classes going on. There were a few people there who did not project a putrid aura so I won't categorize everyone that way but for the most part it was dismal and sad to even linger in the room for minutes let alone the time it must take to try and force yourself to look like Captain America to make up for your inadequacies and insecurities. Go fuck yourself with a dumbbell!

by Anonymousreply 7905/17/2016

[quote]make up for your inadequacies and insecurities

The irony...

by Anonymousreply 8005/17/2016

What is the irony jackass? That is the shit that you vacillate between when you force yourself into a grim routine in order to attain some body standard that is ridiculous and frankly not that appealing to anyone who values time spent expanding the scope of your intellect or empathy perhaps. Try it some time you might learn something. Say it along with me: I am not good enough . I am a dirty faggot. I am fug and unloveable if I have any flab on my body whatsoever. If my abs look like a sixpack maybe people will consider me a valuable human being. I am wasting time and energy trying to impress people who did not like me then and do not like me now.

by Anonymousreply 8105/17/2016

Meltdown May is still going strong!

by Anonymousreply 8205/17/2016

I used to go to the gym religiously, and by religiously I had a eating disorder and only did cardio (2 hours on the elliptical.) 5-6x a week. I went from 240 to 145 in months, I looked great in clothes but a hot mess of excess skin naked, still got laid all the time though.

Now I'm fat again, but I bicycle 3-5x a week; for about two hours. I'm slowly loosing weight again, the correct way; no excess skin and gaining muscle. I'm also eating much less meat, down to a few meals per month.

Alcohol consumption = strictly vodka and club soda w/ lemon or lime.

by Anonymousreply 8305/17/2016

R79 I said "prurient fUgs".

It's a portmanteau of "fags + ugly".

Reading comprehension, as you said, is important.

It's a shame you're not capable of it.

by Anonymousreply 8405/17/2016

I love it when the mind reading begins

Keep on embarrassing yourself R81

by Anonymousreply 8505/17/2016

OP hasn't yet learned the truth the rest of us learned at 17.

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by Anonymousreply 8605/17/2016

Oh i got the origin of your clever neologism asshat. It is a shame that the entire thrust of your post was so putrid I couldn't possibly address it all. Nor would i want to pick it apart so carefully as erudite as you seem to think you are. Save it for your dudebros no homos.

by Anonymousreply 8705/17/2016

Do you know ANY hot guys?

With that shrieking personality, creeperness, and laziness about you taking care of your body, it's no wonder that they reject you R87

by Anonymousreply 8805/17/2016

The word of the day is....neologism. R87 is always trying to elevate the tone around here.

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by Anonymousreply 8905/17/2016

[quote]Why wouldn't you try to look like this? You feel better about yourself if nothing else. If you look good, you feel good.

Why do you give a shit how we look is the better question? Grindr down?

by Anonymousreply 9005/17/2016

And this is your problem because...?

by Anonymousreply 9105/17/2016

[quote] [R79] I said "prurient fUgs". It's a portmanteau of "fags + ugly".

Ooh Mary, we ARE eloquent, aren't we?

by Anonymousreply 9205/17/2016

I find this amusing. The same people who hide behind a keyboard and impose their stupidity on others for giggles are the same ones who leave real man's work to be done by all the shrieking fairies who got you here. You are rejecting your brain and are in desperate need of a transplant. Too bad you don't know anyone who gives a shit about you enough to care anymore despite what your apps and profiles tell you.

by Anonymousreply 9305/17/2016

OP is the same troll who complained about guys using beards to hide their facial flaws, isn't he?

by Anonymousreply 9405/17/2016

R93 is so butch he's making soup out of my panties!

by Anonymousreply 9505/17/2016

Not everybody who works out goes to the gym. For example, I use weights. a treadmill, and exercise bike at home, and jog a few times a week outside.

The gym can be social, and provide more variety for certain types of exercise; but rather than pay membership fees, one can invest in their own basic equipment.

by Anonymousreply 9605/17/2016

What? Now you are making me laugh and I am not trying to crack a smile. I have just had some time on my hands due to a death in the family and reading some of these threads lately has really been awful. Creepy this and grandpa that I just find all this shit so depressing. So retrograde and once more being embraced and lauded.

by Anonymousreply 9705/17/2016

Fugly = fucking ugly. Not fag + ugly.

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by Anonymousreply 9805/17/2016

Oh and same w/ fug.

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by Anonymousreply 9905/17/2016

Qigong can make one feel happy.

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by Anonymousreply 10005/17/2016

I joined a gym a while ago and soon regretted it. It's much easier to work out at home, where there's no attitude, homophobia, leers, or sneers; no concerns about whether the guy next to me is lifting more or whether my gear is cutting edge. I can focus all of my energy on staying fit and can avoid all of the other stuff that is all too common at the gym.

by Anonymousreply 10105/17/2016

Come and get some of this, fellas!

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by Anonymousreply 10205/17/2016

To R48: Using a treadmill does not have to be a bore if one is able to listen to music. During my adolescence, I was obese and lost weight partly by exercising with music. Within just over a year, I was slender and have remained so ever since. To R73 : Workout attire from 1979? Photographs, please!

by Anonymousreply 10305/17/2016

R101 No other gym goer cares about you at all. They don't notice what you are wearing, they don't notice how much you are lifting, etc. Other guys at the gym are there to work out...period. You have imported your anxiety and your fearfulness into the gym. I suspect that your are always anxious and fearful, all the time.

We will, however, judge for your lack of gym etiquette. If you do not let people work in with you on a piece of equipment, if you do not rerack your weights, if you constantly stare at the hot guys and are generally a creeper, you will be met with justifiable hostility and judgement.

by Anonymousreply 10405/17/2016

Well put, R104, but inaccurate--guys at the gym have hit on me when I have no inclination to do anything but work out. And there's that breed of gym rat who's always competitive about who's lifting what while giving a running commentary to his gymbros. But that's just been my experience; maybe that's the exception. I don't stare, I rerack, and I don't hog equipment. It's still less hassle to work out at home.

by Anonymousreply 10505/17/2016

...and the music. Beyond terrible

by Anonymousreply 10605/17/2016

The invention of headphone's was decades ago.

by Anonymousreply 10705/17/2016

Yeah r104 is a nice sentiment but inaccurate. That are some people at the gym who are very involved in what other people are doing. But you shouldn't give them any mind.

by Anonymousreply 10805/17/2016

R101 - If you feel that hostility, you must rise to it and face it. Chances are, it's mostly in your head. I mean that in a positive way.

by Anonymousreply 10905/17/2016

There's so much insecurity here.

by Anonymousreply 11005/17/2016


Anxious and fearful people are at a disadvantage in dating, life, etc.

Having a good body leads to confidence, which is, in all things, is an advantage.

by Anonymousreply 11105/17/2016

That is, if you equate confidence with physical appearance. That is a sign of insecurity.

by Anonymousreply 11205/17/2016

You think so R112?

Spoken like a true fatass

by Anonymousreply 11305/17/2016

Gym is boring. Those who spend hours and hours at the gym usually are boring people and have no lives.

by Anonymousreply 11405/17/2016

Elliptical machines and such are huge time-wasters. You don't burn many calories and the aerobic effects are minimal. Why do gyms put so much into machines that offer so little. Eat less and lift heavier weights. Other than that it's all a waste of time.

by Anonymousreply 11505/17/2016

Is Kevin $pacey gay, or a ped0?

So what's the best type of cardio then R115? Besides swimming.

by Anonymousreply 11605/17/2016

It depends on your goals, r116. Want to put on muscle and burn off fat? Do a 60/40 weights/strength training to cardio split. Any cardio will do, as long as it gets your heart rate up for a while. For weights, do free weights where you can - they're much more effective than the machines. Youtube is your friend if you're looking for tips on proper form. If cardio is all you're doing I'd pick something that works upper and lower body. I joined the gym early last year (early 40s here) and love it. It's an unstaffed, 24/7 place attended by regular schmucks like me, with very few serious builderbros. I'm looking and feeling better than I have for years. I joined to help motivate my partner, who was having health issues. The health issues are resolving, he's losing weight and packing on muscle, and he'd glad he's finally taken steps to feel better.

by Anonymousreply 11705/17/2016

Lol. Well since you asked Travis-I was wearing one of those tanktop and shorts combos-you know the ones I'm talking about from right out of the seventies and early eighties-with piping around the edges. At least the young woman at the reception desk said I looked cute lol.

by Anonymousreply 11805/17/2016

Which would you rather look like. It's strange how many people here fights against being fit.

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by Anonymousreply 11905/18/2016

Most people are lazy and worthless R119

So it has been, so it is, and so it ever will be.

It says a lot about a person's personality...lazy slugs are more likely to be selfish, unaware of their responsibilities to people around them, and fatties suck in bed.

No wonder the hot bros, whom lazy assess lust after, reject them.

by Anonymousreply 12005/18/2016

I hate posts like r119, that imply the only choices are being very fit and trim, OR overweight in a gross, unhealthy way. THIS is what I would actually prefer to look like:

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by Anonymousreply 12105/18/2016

[quote]and fatties suck in bed.

Guys who are really hot have been the worst in bed from my experience, almost expect to just be worshipped. People who aren't as attractive try harder.

by Anonymousreply 12205/18/2016

Not in my experience R122

The discipline that it takes to stay is shape is also carries over to being good at sex.

Unattractive people trying harder on MY body? Ugh. What a nauseating thought.

by Anonymousreply 12305/18/2016

You're obviously a very deep, introspective person R123

by Anonymousreply 12405/18/2016

I'm forwarding R123's post to Jack Handey.

by Anonymousreply 12505/18/2016

To R118: ...and at least a few inches above the knee? Is it not incredible how much the length of shorts for men has changed in the last few decades. Why are so many men(even rather fit ones) frightened of showing a little bit of leg to the degree of wearing garments that resemble skirts?

by Anonymousreply 12605/18/2016

I don't go to a gym. I go to Planet Fitness. Serious body builders really don't want to be seen there.

by Anonymousreply 12705/18/2016

That's true dude

by Anonymousreply 12805/18/2016

What about gay men who don't get lipo or botox / fillers? I mean, gurl, come on... nobody wants to see you age and sag.

by Anonymousreply 12905/18/2016

Ugh, the Gurl troll

by Anonymousreply 13005/18/2016

Be honest - when you see a fat guy or a fit guy walking down the street, which one do you look at with interest? Please stop defending being lazy.

by Anonymousreply 13105/18/2016

Not even the fat guys want fat guys.

by Anonymousreply 13205/18/2016

Shorts have been creeping up for a while now, R126. I see regularly see guys wearing "booty" shorts, in and out of the gym. Exhibitionism is rampant.

by Anonymousreply 13305/18/2016

Here you go Travis- like these. You sound fun.

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by Anonymousreply 13405/19/2016

Muscles matter bro

by Anonymousreply 13505/19/2016

I resent the sentiment of this post so extremely I can't even tell you. I'm glad to see someone openly state this, though, since it's a primary, pervasive sentiment among gay men.

Most guys won't care, but here's why I resent it: I'm sick. Very sick with chronic Lyme disease, which as much as I wish I didn't have to put it this way is a whole lot like full-blown AIDS. It becomes an immune deficiency and it has absolutely ruined my life.

I used to work out 5-6 days a week, bare minimum. Now I have exercise intolerance. When I get overheated, I actually have seizure-like tremors and occasionally black out. I get double vision. I can't even think, and on a couple of occasions couldn't speak at all when I had this heat sensitivity.

Since I've been ill, I have been unable to work out. As a result, gay men very noticeably regard me with disdain. I'm pushing 40, so having lived through the AIDS crisis, it's abhorrent to me that gay men have absolutely no compassion for people who aren't well and view this as a weakness and almost as a moral failing of some sort. Psychologically, it's devastating to know that in the end, all that matters to most gay men is that you are a musclebound Adonis, and if you're not, there's no human connection and certainly no sympathy. I'm not talking about sex partners and hookup culture; I'm just talking about being friends or even just friendly on a basic level. If you're not beautiful, gay men have no time for other gay men. My gay pride has been obliterated as a consequence of acquiring an infection from a tick.

by Anonymousreply 13605/19/2016

I'm so sorry you have become alienated from a segment of the gay community due to an emerging health problem. Please know that some gay men have the maturity and life experience to not judge others who may appear on the surface to lack the energy, enthusiasm, or even ability to join in activities which celebrate the vigor of the male form. To embody beauty and not be able to bring any joy to other human beings seems like a pyrrhic victory to me too.

by Anonymousreply 13705/19/2016

I'm so sorry you have become alienated from a segment of the gay community due to an emerging health problem. Please know that some gay men have the maturity and life experience to not judge others who may appear on the surface to lack the energy, enthusiasm, or even ability to join in activities which celebrate the vigor of the male form. To embody beauty and not be able to bring any joy to other human beings seems like a pyrrhic victory to me too.

by Anonymousreply 13805/19/2016

R138 Thank you. I honestly appreciate that. I honestly expected to be denounced for my statement given the usual tone of this website.

by Anonymousreply 13905/19/2016

I have been "going to the gym" for thirty years. I hit a wall last month. Now in my 50's, I am still thin and still in good shape so it isn't about THAT. But something in me completely shifted one day, seemingly overnight, that I HATE THIS AND AM NOT DOING IT ANYMORE. Not the staying in shape part. But I had an epiphany that I was older, was going to die at some point regardless, that walking in place on a treadmill was not worth driving to some sterile gym with fat people all around me (nothing against them, at least they were all IN a gym), parking, going in and swiping a card, getting a locker, changing clothes and THEN going out and using public machinery that I had to wipe off after each use (our gym has spray cleaner and towels for that) for an hour, all the while ignoring everyone around me while I wore earbuds. The whole experience just became suddenly "meaningless" and anodyne and rote and life-killing, not affirming. I am going to try pilates or yoga. Something with some "more" to it. Something to expand my mind and spirit more. I have always run outside and taken long walks, and hiked in good weather so I will continue to DO that. And I might buy some home weights. But "gyms?" Done. Something inside me clicked off. Checked out. There are OTHER ways to stay in shape and be fit and be healthy. Some of the posters here might be disgustingly lazy, yes, and trying to "defend their fat." But some might be like me and just have an aversion to a traditional GYM. There is a huge difference.

by Anonymousreply 14005/19/2016

I'm sorry R136 that you're sick. I cannot imagine what you're going through, though I certainly sympathize. But some of what you said is utter bullshit. You are pushing 40 and yet lived through the AIDS crisis? Hardly. I'm 40 and I was a child during the worst of the crisis. By the time you were having sex and I was having sex, gay men were not dying in droves. You and I knew to practice safe sex. You don't need to exaggerate to find empathy or attention.

It's my estimation that you're looking for sympathy from the wrong group of gay men. If you cannot cultivate the body you want, maybe try cultivating your mind. I've never been one to spend any time in a gym, but I never lack for the company of smart, clever, and beautiful gay men, but then again maybe we're not looking for them in the same places. Expand your view, you never know what you might find.

by Anonymousreply 14105/19/2016

Not to negate the intent of your post, but I am almost 42 and have been sexually active since I was a teenager and remember the hysteria and stigma of the early years of the AIDS epidemic. The rate of infections and aids deaths climbed ever higher in the early nineties and reached an all time high in the US prior to 1995 when HIV protease inhibitor drugs were finally approved and became available. Worldwide new infections and deaths from AIDS did not begin to taper off until 2001.

by Anonymousreply 14205/19/2016

R137 had a great reply.

As for living through the AIDS crisis, there was still a ton of fear and confused information in the 90s. There were more deaths in the 90s than the 80s, but we just had more information and a few drugs (NNRTIs like AZT) so the environment felt a little different. The worst ended with the introduction of the protease inhibitors and HAART in 1995, but we still didn't know that would definitively work long term. It was a human experiment (and many PIs had very bad long term side effects like crixivan). Nobody knew the life expectancy of someone on "the cocktail" or if it would even increase. Now, 20 years later, we can look back and say - oh it all changed overnight and it's no longer as bad as it was., but nobody knew it would be this successful in 1995 when the first PI came out. So, anyway, yeah it was bad in the 90s too. The "crisis" probably ended around 1997 when it became more manageable and better info was available. The 80s was just a lot worse emotionally bc nobody knew wtf was going on and nobody was interested in helping.

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by Anonymousreply 14305/19/2016

"all that matters to most gay men is that you are a musclebound Adonis"

You sound unhinged and I agree with R141.

by Anonymousreply 14405/19/2016

There is going to the gym and then there is going to the gym.

Cardio plus some weights a few times a week is healthy. Everyone should be getting that much exercise in some form. That doesn't make you a gym bunny.

by Anonymousreply 14505/19/2016

I'm 50, poz, shaven head, 8" cut, and in fucking good shape. Gym every day. See twinks get fat, but I keep myself built and cut. I've still got my six-pack and nice meaty thighs and biceps. I've got guys asking half-seriously if I need stents to hold up all that meat I'm packing between my thighs. My left nut's literally as big as a billiard ball and I sometimes get saline injections because I like a huge sack swinging between my hot, veiny thighs. These fat, nasty h0mos who think they can cruise and strut their shit in saunas without taking care of themselves make me sick..

Fraus get fat. Real men don't.

by Anonymousreply 14605/19/2016

What's the point of losing weight after 40? Your skin doesn't go back into place after a 100 lb weight loss, no matter how much time you spend in the gym. You're just setting yourself up for $30,000 in surgery to look halfway normal. Might as well stay fat, happy, and die young.

By the way, I am nowhere near this fat... but at near-40, I already notice that my flab is not going back the same way it did when I was younger. It almost makes more sense to stay fatter than to have flabby loose skin like some gastric bypass patient...and to be clear I'm talking about 6'1 205 dieting down to 185...which still isn't even that thin...but it's a reasonable goal. It's not major, but it's clear that it is not what it was 15 years ago. Building muscle also is about 2x as hard as it used to be.

I kind of just want to be a fat fuck. I have a very low sex drive anyway.

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by Anonymousreply 14705/19/2016

The point is to not die young.

And yeah, skin after major weight loss isn't going to look great, but if you build muscle, it will help with that.

by Anonymousreply 14805/19/2016

r147 you gotta stay in shape, brah.

by Anonymousreply 14905/19/2016

I should clarify (I'm R147) that I was 220 at first. For whatever reason, I am "jiggly" after losing 15 lbs and it's fucking gross. even my face looks weird. I was in decent shape my whole life until a 6 month period of hell (long story) where I packed on more pounds than any period in my life. I HOPE this shit will tighten up, but I don't know. It hasn't been that long . It's funny that I was 165 in my teens, 175 in my 20s, 185 in my 30s - like there's some weird set-point that my body wont' let me break through.

I go to the gym 4-6 days a week and have a trainer... but once you fuck up your skin and age...and have thick skin on top of it - it's not a good situation. I saw a lipo doc and he was like - oh...this isn't good... you aren't really that overweight, but I can't take the fat out. Your skin is too lax. Great. I have spent 10 hours in the sun in 40 years, and I have loose / lax skin?

by Anonymousreply 15005/19/2016

Sorry about the brain atrophy, R146...

by Anonymousreply 15105/19/2016

r151, what you don't like huge sacks?

by Anonymousreply 15205/19/2016

Are you really one of those saline pumper guys? Isn't it hard to sit? People really like this? The amount of guys who are into this sort of amazes me

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by Anonymousreply 15305/19/2016

What was not confusing about the AIDS crisis in the 1990s was that HIV was a sexually transmitted and its transmission could be prevented by practicing safe sex. For R136 to claim that he lived through the AIDS crisis is overstating things at best. At any point he might have been having sex, he knew how to prevent contracting HIV. We dishonor the horror that our forebears dealt with by claiming it as our own. Yes, I would have loved to live in a world where HIV didn't exist when I was having sex, but it's not something that crept up on my friends and me.

by Anonymousreply 15405/19/2016

Hmm. It's not a competition. Nor is it a pity-party. What happens to people, strong brave men included, is that like someone mentioned above, they wake up one day and realize life is short and decide the benefits of adhering to a strict gym workout regimen versus staying active in a much more life-affirming environment let's say hiking or biking or walking does not compute anymore. Everybody has their approach to staying healthy and fit why do you assume that theirs is some sort of failure if the results don't resemble your own ambitious goals?

by Anonymousreply 15505/19/2016

R153 - that's my husbear!

by Anonymousreply 15605/19/2016

The main problem with exercise is that you cannot spot-reduce fat. The love handles I had at 18 are the love handles I have 20 years later, regardless of weight changes. Lipo would get rid of them in 45 minutes...and 20 years in the gym would not. My face and ass are thin, but my abdomen has always been fatter (relative to other parts of my body) - even when I lose weight. It just comes off my face and ass. When I gain, my face and ass stay thin and I get a beer belly and man boobs. The gym won't change this distribution of fat. Surgeons will, and that is why lipo is the #1 plastic surgery procedure done in the usa.

Yes, the gym gives you is the ability to be toned and build muscle. Of course, the caveat is that if you want huge muscles after a certain age, then you need to find a steroid / HGH dealer...simply put. Also, no muscles will even show up if you have bad body fat distribution (like covering your pecs, making you have gynecomastia, covering your abs, making your back flab over all the back muscles, etc...) These aren't excuses...just the reality of the gym after a certain age and with limitations on flexibility / laxity of skin.

It's not as bad as I am making it sound, but the reality of weight loss / muscle building over 40 is very different than before 40.

by Anonymousreply 15705/19/2016

r157 is a chub!

by Anonymousreply 15805/19/2016

Why is 40 the defining age? Everyone is different. I've seen guys have major transitions in their mid-40s. Also, a 40-something in the midwest is a lot different than on in NYC.

by Anonymousreply 15905/19/2016

How is a 40-something in the midwest different than a 40-something in NYC in terms of what he was talking about?

by Anonymousreply 16005/19/2016

No shit, R158. You're a genius!

I'm using 40 as a vague benchmark. This is not a scientific statement (it's not a scientific forum). People can drastically range due to genetic factors and how athletic they were over time, etc... my uncle is 60 and has run 4 miles a day for 30 years. He has the body of a 25 year old.

LOL R160 - because he doesn't seem to have aclue what I was talking about.

by Anonymousreply 16105/19/2016

Hold on there, when wildly accusing others of dishonoring forbears or being confused about HIV transmission. I think he was merely drawing a parallel to his own experience being ill and the difficulty making connections when you are facing health problems most people are blissfully unaware of and/or hold some seriously misinformed views about. Illness happens. We are mortal. Life goes on. Live. Let others live their lives. Be kind in the process.

by Anonymousreply 16205/19/2016

If he overstated his position then I am sure he can surmise that reining in the emotional tone of his reactions might help people understand and sympathize with him better. But publicly chastising him on this board also works. I am such a softie with the toughlove.

by Anonymousreply 16305/19/2016

To R134: Why, thank you! I'd like to think so. Yes, those shorts look marvelous.

by Anonymousreply 16405/19/2016

I go to the gym for at least an hour a day every morning, 5 days a week. There's one at my office and it's a no frills set up. I hate it. But if I don't go I would weigh over 200 pounds. I was always athletic as a kid and into my 20s. My 30s were spent building my career, working very long hours and traveling excessively for work and I started putting on weight. By the time I was about to hit 40, I'd put on 50 pounds. I was playing softball and got winded running the bases. I made some changes and got back into shape. I'll never be ripped but I'm not embarrassed to take my shirt off.

by Anonymousreply 16505/19/2016

I'll go for a working man's body over a gym body. Plus, notice how the muscle Marys are so weak? Whaaa I can't lift that it hurts my back, I just lifted weights don't make me move that flower pot, whaaaa I need a massage.

Yeah, my landscaper, my mason, my chimney sweep, my plumber...all hot as fuck. Too bad they are all taken. Straight and gay.... A nice mix.

by Anonymousreply 16605/19/2016

Your retro fantasies are hilarious R166

by Anonymousreply 16705/19/2016

I too used to love going to the gym. Then I became permanently crippled by an FDA-approved antibiotic (Cipro). Haven't seen the inside of a gym since. Hell, I haven't even been able to leave my house since January.

by Anonymousreply 16805/19/2016

Cipro and Levaquin have ruined many people's lives. Sorry to hear about that R168. I tell all docs and hospitals I am allergic to it now. They all look annoyed at me too, which is just ridiculous. Penicillin allergy is normal, but quinolone allergy isn't? It's 100x worse!

I have had numerous surgeries / procedures to repair the damage cipro did to my Achilles tendon and it'll still never be the same. All for a fucking sinus infection that could've been treated with a dozen other things from an antibiotic-happy doctor.

by Anonymousreply 16905/19/2016

Overuse and misuse of antibiotics are causing a growing crisis of drug resistent bacteria. My dad had a bad spill and suffered a hematoma due to hyponatremia (severe dip of sodium levels in the blood) and in the weeks after he was discharged to a rehab facility acquired a C-DIFF infection which was caused by the antibiotics he was given. They killed off the healthful intestinal bacteria and allowed C-DIFF to surge. The infection spreads as the bacteria releases toxins and in the end he died of septic shock. I am still stunned and saddened by the way he went out. I just hope that talking about prevention-through rigorous hygienic practices and recognizing the symptoms of C-DIFF infection-fever, recurrent diarrhea, loss of appetite-other people don't suffer and die like this. I can't seem to articulate thoughts properly into sentences when it comes to what has just transpired. Advocate for yourselves as patients and hold doctors accountable. Please be aware that things like this can happen and are on the rise.

by Anonymousreply 17005/19/2016

Joan Didion's daughter died of septic shock around the age 40.

by Anonymousreply 17105/19/2016

After college a friend's mother died of septic shock from C-DIFF colitis. They tried to save her by removing her colon. She made it through the surgery but ultimately died of cardiac arrest. She was 52 years old. This all started from antibiotic treatment for a root canal. My friend created a foundation in his mother's memory The Peggy Lillis Memorial Foundation whose mission is building awareness and fighting C-DIFF through education and advocacy.

by Anonymousreply 17205/20/2016

R141 I grew up during the 1980s and 1990s. I became sexually active in 1996 at age 18 and, yes, HIV was still a deadly threat. I didn't see a lot of friends die from AIDS as you probably did, and I didn't have to go through the panic of wondering for many years if I would come up HIV positive because I was sexually active before HIV was discovered, and I sympathize with that. I can't really imagine it. At the same time, with respect, having the AIDS crisis hit while you were already into adulthood is different than growing up immersed in an environment of AIDS killing people throughout the country. It was a constant news headline, it drove "very special episodes" of sitcoms regularly, the threat was hammered into us in school. And then when I hit puberty and realized I was gay, all those dangers that were already internalized became real, personal, imminent threats on a psychological level.

It's similar to how Millennials' lives weren't suddenly reset on September 11, 2001; their lives are painted against a backdrop of the post-September 11 world. It's different. I wouldn't say that they have it easier because they were born into the reality rather than suddenly experiencing the trauma of a new reality during adulthood. Both situations are traumatic, in different ways.

And as for invoking the HIV/AIDS crisis at all, I don't do it lightly or with any disrespect or diminishment. I get that most gay men are not going to accept this, but I really wish you'd think about this for a moment: AIDS emerged suddenly, seemingly out of nowhere, in the early 1980s. It took a bit of time to realize that it wasn't a gay boogeyman, but a sexually transmitted infection that causes immune system deficiency--Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome. I have Lyme disease, which I acquired in 1997. It was undertreated and flourished quietly inside my body. By my early 30s, my body was breaking down in ways that looked like ALS or multiple sclerosis, but didn't quite meet the lab requirements to define it as such--similar to how the "gay cancer" of the 80s wasn't really a cancer, but it kind of seemed like one. It turns out that Lyme has been misunderstood and, believe it or not and as crazy as I know this will come across, it has been intentionally mischaracterized by the CDC as a rare infection that's easy to diagnose and cure. It's actually not. Yesterday I spent the entire day on Capitol Hill with hundreds of Lyme patients, most of whom are worse off than I am. The research is suggesting now that not only does Lyme stealthily evade the immune system, but after it has been in the body for years or decades, it suppresses and breaks down the immune system. It is, literally, an Acquired ImmunoDeficiency Syndrome. It's not caused by HIV and it's not called AIDS, but it manifests very similarly, including that many people have no symptoms at all, or as with HIV sometimes only a flulike illness that passes quickly, for five, 10 or more years before it suddenly breaks the body apart.

And here's why I compare Lyme and AIDS in a gay context: Lyme can be passed easily from a mother to a child via the placenta or mother's milk. Lyme has been shown to be transmitted through both semen and vaginal fluid--so it would stand to reason that it could in fact be a sexually transmitted infection. Human-to-human sexual transmission hasn't been documented yet--there haven't been any real studies to determine whether it's possible, though. There are a great number of anecdotal cases of couples claiming that one had to have caught it from his or her partner, who has had Lyme for years. There's no good treatment for Lyme now, and the tests are less than 50 percent accurate, so a lot of people carry Lyme disease and have no idea, even when they are tested.

by Anonymousreply 17305/20/2016

So here's where my "HIV panic" comes into play. We now have PrEP and I've noticed that, at least in Washington, D.C., the norm has become to have unprotected sex and to rely on PrEP instead of condoms. This is foolish. Syphilis, hepatitis are still very real risks, but yes, they are treatable. However, before HIV was wasn't known to be a risk. We don't know what emerging infectious diseases are out there, or how severe they may be. So choosing a pill that protects against one historically devastating infectious disease over condoms opens up the population for another plague. Although it's probably not likely that Lyme disease is that next STI plague, something eventually will be that plague, and to ignore the risk is to forget a traumatic incident with a devastating pandemic.

And it seems to me that the gay culture today is gym-and-sex-with-PrEP culture. I'm exaggerating (slightly), but at least in my city, social communities of gay men are focused almost exclusively on developing a certain kind of idealized body and having a lot of sex, increasingly without condoms. It's a perfect storm of ingredients for another devastation, and yes, having grown up against a backdrop of HIV/AIDS and now living with a disease that's frankly at this time more severe than HIV today is because it's poorly understood and treatment simply doesn't work well for most of us, is maddening. It's an apt comparison as far as what I am witnessing in the world today. You may not see things this way if you're perfectly well and I get that, but unfortunately I can't just override the anxiety of my observations by consciously choosing not to care.

by Anonymousreply 17405/20/2016

This will be my last post about this because I realize it's off topic and probably not something anyone cares about.

R143 There's a ton of confusion and misinformation about Lyme just as there was about HIV/AIDS early on. The parallels are stunning. There's as much fear, too, among the general populace in areas in which Lyme is endemic. Half of my sister's coworkers and their children have Lyme disease, and she works in my hometown; everyone there is hyper-vigilant about it, including a lot of doctors, but an hour away from there it's barely on the radar and as with HIV, countless people are walking around with latent infections that have not yet erupted into devastating illness but likely will over the next 5-10 years. In 2013, the CDC changed its story about Lyme: it had said that there were 26,000 new infections per year, and then suddenly that year it said that the true number is estimated to be 329,000 per year--new infections. This doesn't count carryovers from previous years. The World Health Organization has cited Lyme as an immediate epidemic threat as a result of climate change (because it expands ticks' borders). It is a variation of the HIV phenomenon. For older people who think younger people don't know what the sudden onset of the AIDS crisis was like, you should really talk to someone with Lyme disease because the exact same crisis is happening again right now.

There's a documentary called "Under Our Skin" about Lyme disease, and everyone here should watch it. It's hard to believe a lot of what is shown in the movie as far as the manifestation and severity of symptoms, but I've experienced almost all of them myself--and it's like living with AIDS, but body parts that stop working to fungal infections to a healthcare system that involves medical doctors who panic when you present with symptoms and then when the idea of Lyme enters the picture, you're totally pushed out of the system--much in the way gay men were decades ago. Doctors are afraid to be associated with this disease. Watch Under Our Skin, and watch or read And the Band Played On. Politically, it's the same story. It's happening all over again, the exact same phenomenon involving the CDC and the healthcare system, but because Lyme breaks people down to the point of total incapacity but not as often directly to the point of death, it's less apparent to the public.

by Anonymousreply 17505/20/2016

"there simply is no good evidence that chronic Lyme disease is an actual medical condition. As I have written before, while some patients may experience symptoms after appropriate treatment for Lyme, treatment for persistent or recurrent infection has no grounding in legitimate medical science. On this point the Centers for Disease Control, the National Institutes of Health, and the Infectious Diseases Society of America are all agreed."

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by Anonymousreply 17605/20/2016

Cipro crippled you? How?

by Anonymousreply 17705/20/2016

I'm 50, never been to a gym but walk 3-4 miles at least 3 days a week so I don't have a heart attack. I have naturally large arms and chest so I look like I might work out, but it's not really muscle-y or hard. I also have a belly and love handles. Total dad bod.

And I have to beat the boys off with a stick. Never get grindr messages but scruff is non-stop, and I've made "friends" while on my urban walks,. Choose to believe it or not, defectives of the datalounge, but boys have daddy issues and I'm happy to help them work through them. It's not all about diets and cross fit routines.

by Anonymousreply 17805/20/2016

Try this! Remember, it's all about movement:

Pornhub: Adult Entertainment Website Launches BangFit Fitness Program The program features different sexual exercises. PornHub released a YouTube video detailing the program on Wednesday. The exercises aim to "fight against our sedentary lifestyle," PornHub said.

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by Anonymousreply 17905/20/2016

While waiting for R168 to reply ...

It has been known for years that fluoroquinolone antibiotics (including Cipro, Levaquin, Avelox and others) can cause spontaneous tendon rupture and other degenerative conditions of the tendons and joints. This reaction can occur quickly, after just a couple doses. There are now black-box warnings on these antibiotics warning of the possibility.

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by Anonymousreply 18005/20/2016

Younger guys don't seem to care about the gym. I don't get it.

by Anonymousreply 18106/02/2016

IMO "the gym" as a required aspect of realizing one's gay self is just evidence of gay men having nothing better to do with their time. Society is vastly diverse, with technical workers and white-collar workers, service workers, creative people and policymakers who live inside the box. Professional athletes and some manual laborers have every reason to have the bodies of professional athletes. People who work in offices all day spend the majority of their time inactive or moderately active. That's obviously not the most healthful way to live, but it is the reality--8-10 hours a day are spend doing whatever type of work a person is committed to doing. Gay people (and increasingly young straight people) now feel obligated to spend another 90-120 minutes a day building muscle and burning fat, just for the sake of keeping up appearances, and we have been conditioned to think of this as a healthy lifestyle when in many cases it's detrimental to health: eating unbalanced, protein-heavy diets is not easy on the organs because we are not made to process 150 grams of protein a day. Not every body type is made to squat 300 or more pounds. In my 20s, I was diet- and gym-obsessed. I used correct form, as instructed, and I still permanently injured my back doing squats and shoulder lifts because I had to get bigger and more correctly proportioned...even though I have a very long and narrow frame and never, ever could have the type of bodybuilder chest our generation feels obligated to have, or else we are failures as human beings.

Young straight people do this kind of thing, at least in my city, when they begin their careers--it's all working, working out, drinking, and fuck buddying. And then they have families and give up the gym thing because a person can only have so many obligations. They always seem to be happier and more fulfilled when they do this. That's not advocating for a "straight lifestyle," but it is suggesting that spending 10-15 hours per week dedicated to making one's own body gorgeous for the sake of being appreciated by others isn't an inherently fulfilling thing and at this point in my life, it seems like a trap for gay men. Eventually you turn 40 and it becomes a chore but you can't give it up because you've bought into the idea that worth is tied to physique. By 50 you probably have to take hormones to maintain some semblance of the cut body that you now associate with your entire identity. By 60, what's even the point of going on if in your mind who you are is a beautiful young Adonis with a glistening, golden brown eight pack who other Adonises want to explore with their tongues? You're nobody. You're a failure. And by then for many people it's a little late to start developing (and really appreciating about oneself) non-physical qualities of being.

by Anonymousreply 18206/15/2016

R182 - God, you're depressing. Did it ever occur to you that people like to work out? That exercise and weight lifting gives you a natural high? You really seem exhausting.

by Anonymousreply 18306/16/2016

He's talking about YOU, r183. You missed that, huh?

by Anonymousreply 18406/16/2016

R176 you are the biggest asshole ever.

by Anonymousreply 18506/16/2016

So many lay people here. The gym is good for stress relief and cardiovascular health. You don't have to be a gym rat to go to the gym.

by Anonymousreply 18606/20/2016

R175 Its not like AIDS, dear. Get real.

by Anonymousreply 18706/20/2016

You need your own thread R178.

by Anonymousreply 18806/20/2016

I was in Spain last week and the gay scene is so different than NYC. No one had muscles. It was strange.

by Anonymousreply 18908/04/2016

You weren't around many gay men in Spain if none of them had muscles. There are plenty who do.

by Anonymousreply 19008/04/2016

I've never been a gym rat. I jog daily and play soccer on the weekend.

by Anonymousreply 19108/04/2016

I've been a non-obsessive gym regular since high school, but I always preferred more natural guys - those that were either naturally thin or got their build primarily through sports, work, or testosterone.

Some gays slip into old queen behavior in their older years - IOW, they'd prefer enjoying food and drink to exertion. I'm not sure where the line is drawn between epicurean enjoyments and debauched hedonism, but sometimes it's a relief and sometimes it's ... not.

by Anonymousreply 19208/04/2016

I love working out

by Anonymousreply 19308/04/2016

How dare they not go, OP!!!

by Anonymousreply 19408/04/2016

Until 40 years ago, NOBODY "went to a gym" except actual athletes, OP. The fact that you somehow think it's a some sort of a requirement for living a fulfilled life is interesting.

by Anonymousreply 19508/04/2016

My regular cardio-only routine has resulted in weight loss, lower blood pressure and appears to have cured me of lifelong asthma.

by Anonymousreply 19608/05/2016

Muscles matter

by Anonymousreply 19708/05/2016

No pecs, no sex.

And R195 sounds rotund.

by Anonymousreply 19808/05/2016

Getting plenty here, but thanks for the concern.

by Anonymousreply 19908/05/2016

I've dated dudes who don't go the gym, but after datjng buff dudes who do, I just can't do it. It's so much hotter to have a dude up against you with tight, buff hard muscles. It feels so good and looks awesome. Guys without muscles feel so flabby and puny.

by Anonymousreply 20008/05/2016

Someone posted photos on a thread recently of people in the early '70s. Or find photos of guys at discos in the mid-70s. Other than dancing they didn't work out. Those gay men looked just fine.

Men these days want to enjoy life. If they are athletic they engage in sporting activities. Otherwise they may engage in activities they like. People who are generally active and watch their weight don't have to work out.

by Anonymousreply 20108/05/2016

Oh please R201, quite repeating that same bullshit that athletes only have to engage in sporting activities.

Any athlete, be they pro or amateur, in college or high school, whether they engage in football, tennis, golf, swimming, lacrosse, ANY sport, engages in weight and strength training. At this time of year, my gym is full of kids home from college doing their required conditioning programs for their intercollegiate or intramural sports programs. Do you honestly think amateur triathletes and cyclists don't condition themselves at the gym?

Perhaps the "athletes" you know are the guys in the local softball league, where the main objective is to see how much beer you can drink and maybe play a little ball in between guzzling beer.

by Anonymousreply 20208/05/2016

I heard Kevin Spacey is hung.

by Anonymousreply 20308/05/2016

R202, try reading for a change. The subject is gay men and the gym. I'm not talking about formal competitive sports. Guys out of school who are not in professional sports don't all want to go to the gym even if they maintain a normal weight.

by Anonymousreply 20408/05/2016

Straight dudes are more into the gym today than gay dudes. Being big and buff has become the male body standard

by Anonymousreply 20508/05/2016

R203, would you do Spacey just because of that? I see a lumpy, out of shape arrogant hairy mess. I don't care what's in his pants. I would not touch that.

by Anonymousreply 20608/07/2016

The rise of the buff gym bros is a great thing for society

by Anonymousreply 20708/07/2016

[quote]I've dated dudes who don't go the gym, but after datjng buff dudes who do, I just can't do it.

Well I hope you go to the gym together, cause you know those gym dudes you date are fucking other gym dudes at their gym, Jim.

by Anonymousreply 20808/07/2016


by Anonymousreply 20908/30/2016

This shit again.

Look, I work out, I played high school baseball back in the day and have always kept my body in shape. I get squirrelly if I don't do some form of exercise.

But... I realize that not everyone is into that.

That's why there's a whole bear community and plenty of plain old flabby guys. I don't find them attractive but they seem to find each other pretty hot.

Pot, cover and all that.

by Anonymousreply 21008/30/2016

It’s shocking

by Anonymousreply 21106/14/2020

I miss the gym So much

by Anonymousreply 21207/03/2020


by Anonymousreply 21310/01/2020

Texting and smartphone use have ruined the gym-going experience for me. It's now standard behavior to sit on the machine you're using in-between sets and text away. And if four, five, six minutes go by, I guess one is supposed to be grateful that it wasn't seven or eight.

by Anonymousreply 21410/10/2020

I have run for about 20 years, but now I have an injury that makes that impossible. After a year of not running, I have gained weight.

Would like to go to the gym but really clueless about what to do once I am there.

by Anonymousreply 21510/10/2020

Most gyms are not so great. I don't, however, agree that they are "soul crushing". The Equinox I went to close to my house in LA had some super nice people of various age groups with interesting jobs outside the superficial LA culture like engineering, medicine, and journalism. There was always news on the flat screen TVs and we were all liberals and Trump haters. Most trainers had a college degree and were friendly. The place was luxurious but also down to earth. There were also a lot of classes and plenty of gay men (none you would wanna hook up as they weren't particularly attractive but they had the courses on nutrition, etc.).

I DO hate their politics and would only go back because after 2 hours into the car and 8 at the office, zoning out on the eliptical with my news or podcasts blaring was a good release followed by the spa and a relaxing shower and dinner. Granted it costs a fortune.

by Anonymousreply 21610/10/2020

Kevin Spacey isn’t an actor anymore. No one would hire him for anything

by Anonymousreply 21710/10/2020

It’s a brotherhood

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 21811/16/2020

OP, what do you expect when fat acceptance propaganda is out of control?

by Anonymousreply 21911/16/2020

I hate the gym and working out so I will always be out of shape. But the minute the muscle queens see my dick pic, their standards go out the door and all of a sudden I'm not so unfit anymore.

by Anonymousreply 22011/16/2020

Going to the gym hurts.

by Anonymousreply 22111/16/2020

Apart from COVID, and physical inability, I don’t get it. Working out is great!

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