Is there a class system or caste system or hierarchy in gay male life?

As someone who has been in the NYC scene for 20 years, yes there is a class system. It's all about look and if you don't fit into a certain look, you are shunned like an Amish whore.

What's the look? And more interesting, why the look? In LA everybody has to be fit, even the elderly, so the basis is less easy to discern here.

You mean like this, OP?

Generally, yeah. The one of the left looks trashier than the one on the right but generally that's the mould. Or are all the straight boys like this too?

"The look" is not the point alone. "The money" is the other big component. Because many non-starters in the looks/age areas find themselves near the center of a clutch of gays when their net worth is discovered.

Plus NYC - in the upper reaches, rather than the lower-end "looka me I'm hot and have my own place" pseudo-cuties, money AND position (a combination of career, celebrity, and assertive aesthetic) have often trumped mere looks.

The point is that the lookers have always been little more, really, than the harem of the true power gays. No matter how they prance about showing their muscles and manly beards.

Yes, OP. And in this order: good-looking, rich, young

[quote]Or are all the straight boys like this too?

Of course not! You know that. You love straight guys. Now back to your "gay for pay" porn.

you basically want to know if your hole stinks or not. it does stink.

97.4% of them are bottoms, which puts them far further down the list than they think.

[quote]Yes, OP. And in this order: good-looking, rich, young

Great! I hit the trifecta. Does this mean I'll be an A+ gay in NYC when I come out?

So gay life is just one big high school dance?

r11, everything in life is. you're "in" or you're "out"

R11: Honey, ALL life is just one big high school dance.

We did not notice or care much if we were part of that group of 'official homosexuals' but we are today glad that most of our contact with the Hershey Highway resulted in healthy additias to our bank balance!

Us rich gays are starting a petition to drop the poor gays.

We're calling it: Drop the P

Keep an eye out for my 3,000 posts about it.

A "clutch" of gays, R5? Gays are snakes now?

And 3,000 threads.

Only if you see the world in a very tiny, limiting way.

R13, is that a line from some movie where an older drag performer is offering words of wisdom to a younger, first time performer before he/she walks on stage for the first time?

[quote]So gay life is just one big high school dance?

No because at a high school dance you get punch and cookies. And you get to leave if you're not having a good time.

Nothing new here. They're called cliques and they've been around gay and straight bars forever. "A list"...I have to laugh at anyone so pretensious and delusional. Those only exist in their damaged minds.

The minds may be damaged, I don't know, but they definitely exist. It's like playing the suit in cards.

Muscle clones and circuit queens are hot for a fuck and definitely their own, social circle.

But society overall looks down on them, just like Jersey Shore juice heads. Guys who spend that much time working out and partying are not productive, not smart, usually not educated and don't have affluent jobs.

Being in New York, I would think you could see that the rich guys are lean and well-dressed. They aren't SWOLL, they don't have the time.

Maybe gay guys think muscle clones are "A-list" because all they care about is sex. But who has money to provide a good life? Who does jobs that pay well? Who is needed and respected in society overall?

Not these bimbos. Get some money and hire them off rentmen.com for all they're good for.

But don't call a subculture "A-list" and don't mistake sex as the most important thing in life.

Hamptons, really? Circuit boys party in the Hamptons with all the bankers and doctors?

I thought they partied on Fire Island amongst themselves.

r21, I prefer to laugh with people rather than at them. If you choose the latter, though, it's probably more effective when you get your pejoratives right.

I wanna join the A-list. How can I do it? I am 27 and fashionable. Should I become an escort for some Hamptons daddy?

You should get an education and a career for yourself.

R25, if you're 27 then you are a daddy.

Most people are followers, including gays.

r27, sadly somewhat true

Of course there's a class/caste/hierarchy system in gay male life.

And sadly, I've always been near the bottom of it.

It's a game I've opted to stop playing.

I don't go out anymore.

r30, you are healthy and alive and better because of it

OP's stereotypical effete gay ghetto world sounds worst than a turkish prison. Just a horrible, hollow, stereotypical life.

This is nothing new in nyc. Gay/str8 it just matter. You're in a hyper competitive environment and that is what the city attracts. You either deal or move on.

I live here and WTF is A-gay. If there are, I certainly would like to know the name of any gay CEO's, politicians, bankers. moguls or other powerful leader.

There are three things that matter on the Hershey Highway, and three things only, no matter what your 'social background':

1) Are you under 40 and drop-dead gorgeous?

2) Do you have 10 inches or more?

3) Do you have $10 million or more.

That's it folks - there ain't no more!

so messy

On the internet nobody knows I have a grizzled saggy ass.

R31, yeah, it was great going from being picked on and rejected by bullies and peers in High School to getting picked on and rejected by the gay community. Really wonderful.

That's good, r6, but there's also dick size ... where does that fit in the hierarchy?

R35 Under 40? More like Under 25.

2015 bump troll STRIKES AGAIN. We collectively shit in your gaping mouth, bump troll. Die gagging on shit in a grease fire.

After spending my 20’s as a plain somewhat looking gay I hit the weights and spent money on moisturizer, a tan and lots of blonde.

I had fun being an “A” list gay for about two years traveling between Boston and NYC in the 90’s. No one really spends more than a few years on it, most succumb to drugs, loss of a prestigious job, breakup with the A List boyfriend or dare I say weight gain.

I accidentally landed on the cover of an gay international magazine and suddenly my face and body was everywhere, I was like a gay Brad Pitt. Gay currency is a clear face free of aging, (The greatest compliment is for someone to say you look ageless) a head full of shiny hair, and a sinewy body stoked for sex. If you have all three (I did) it will propel you to the upper echelon of A list status. Money only gets you so far, I met plenty of men with family money.

Here’s what I discovered-

1. Most of the A List Are insecure, and something lit a fire in them years ago to completely transform themselves 2. They sacrifice all sorts of things to keep up their looks, four hours every day at the gym, it was exhausting! 3. There’s usually a bossy, aging bottom in the group that is looking to knock you off your perch (or sleep with you and tell everyone). 4. The status is fleeting, I knew this going in so I took full advantage. I dated a billionaire for a week, just to see what it was like. Amazing! 5. People have a preconceived idea of who you are that couldn’t be any further than the truth, this happened to me many times.] 6. No one stays on the A list longer than 2.5 years unless they have a dick of death or are an upper executive in entertainment.

I think the one thing I took away from the whole experience is that “A List” status means nothing if you are still lonely or dissatisfied with who you are. All that was over 20 years ago, and I wouldn’t trade who I am today for being on that list again.

Me, 1997

R42/R43 Thanks so much for sharing! Fascinating. I would love to read your memoirs of that time.

[Quote] Yes, OP. And in this order: good-looking, rich, young

You need to be white too.