Your run-in with a sociopath

"What amazes me is how he was able to convince everyone what a great guy he was ..."

^^^ That is the hallmark of a sociopath. They are consummate actors and obfuscators.

Whatever

[quote]What amazes me is how he was able to convince everyone what a great guy he was when it was clear he was full of shit.

What can I say? It's a gift!

R1 sadly yes. A perfect example is he would repeat whatever someone said when it was a subject he clearly didn't understand. He would just parrot what people said making it seem like his own opinion while agreeing with them.

That's why I am having doubts about Jim Carrey ' s very public display of grief carrying his ex-girlfriend ' s coffin. He is brilliant at evoking a very broad range of emotions.

Then he'll hop on the Gulfstream, pop the champagne,put movie on, take a little seeping aid, then back by the pool - reading scripts .

Every time I have to deal with heterosexuals, I know I'm dealing with sociopaths.

"He would just parrot what people said making it seem like his own opinion while agreeing with them."

This is a blatant attack on our sole demographic.

[quote]Every time I have to deal with heterosexuals, I know I'm dealing with sociopaths

That is a useless comment that reflects worse on you than anyone else.

It's a wise precaution R8, no need to get snippy.

No, R9, there is no wisdom whatever in advising gay people to view all heterosexuals as sociopaths. There is nothing but misdirected fear, hatred, and paranoia in such advice.

Blah blah blah R10. May your eyes be opened by experience.

Too many and too frigtening to talk about.

My neighbor taught some kind of wealth-building seminar with Trump, who cajoled him into it. He did it, but he didn't get paid and when he called Trump about it, Trump denied any connection with the people who ran the seminar. Trump is a real piece of work. He sells his name but he is always careful to separately incorporate every business, so that when they fail, as they usually do, it doesn't affect the empire. The very fact he gets away with it is an indictment of our "free market," which should have put him out of business permanently thirty years ago.

Oh just you wait...need more cigs and beer & do I have tales for you, along with online support groups

Oh my R8.

How many are out there? I've run into a few. It's unpleasant.

True sociopaths are not that common. There are, however, lots of narcissists and borderline personality disordered people around. They are toxic and often behave like sociopaths.

r17, can you explain the similarities between a BDP and a sociopath?

Borderlines have a very unstable sense of their identity, which leads them to cause others a lot of trouble as they are capable of changing relationships, orientation, or walking out of a job in a flash. It looks like the impetuosity of a sociopath.

Borderlines are also in intense emotional upheaval much of the time and they usually try and self medicate with compulsive drinking, drug taking or sex - so this too can look sociopathically irresponsible.

Also, borderlines play games with people. They are motivated by a very undeveloped emotionality which seeks to find idealised protectors/ care givers. they can be extremely charming in pursuit of a potential care giver. This can look like the glib charm of a sociopath. Lastly borderlines devalue people as quickly as they idealise them, and when devaluation kicks in, they can abandon a partner or family member in the blink of an eye. They can also be extremely violent when under stress, which is often. So these traits too, can appear sociopathic.

I was friends with this girl in college. About 15 years ago, she "broke up" with me. I recently reached out via this new thing called the Internet, and then we started talking by phone. I thought she was a little passive aggressive, but whatever, an old friend is a special thing. I invited her to visit since we were having a 35 year college reunion.

She came for a few days. She was so lazy, she didn't want to walk anywhere. Even a matter of 10 feet. She was pushy, demanding, domineering, a Republican, angry, controlling, insulting, a complete mental case. She refused to help me identify the correct exit off the highway to get to the reunion, not that she was preoccupied with anything else, she was just too lazy and passive aggressive. At the time, she had "broken up" with her brother and they weren't speaking. It was so bad that it occurred to me that I could just tell her at the reunion that she had to get her own ride back to the airport because I wasn't putting up with it any longer.

I am mortified that she might have been that way in college, and I put up with it. I don't think she was that bad, though. She got worse with age, and boy did she get worse. And then she died. How horrible for a mother to have to call her kid's friends to say her kid, though now an adult, had died. And her brother, they hadn't spoken for a year, how sad for him. At her memorial, he told me the events she claimed she went to on her Facebook page were fictitious, as were some other things she had long told me about herself.

I'm really pissed that she died, but only so I could periodically tell her off. She lived longer than her preacher dad did. I think she mixed opiates with liquor, but her brother said it was her heart (like their dad). I still think it was opiates, which I knew she was taking. The bigger question is whether or not it was suicide.

I never called her after the reunion, though I think I did send her a card. She died about 4 months later. Oh, get this - she died Dec 6 in New Mexico where she lived. Her mom had a memorial service on Dec 23 in Connecticut where the mom lived. I went to the memorial, then to my family's for Christmas. The next day on Xmas eve, I was having lunch with my siblings, at lunch, I GOT A TEXT FROM HER! It was just a "heart". All the blood drained to my feet. I almost fainted. WTF?

R19, I have my notice to a job abruptly because Injust couldn't take working there anymore. It was soul draining. Is that borderline personality?

I gave

No, dear. Not unless you also have a pattern of feeling intense, unstable emotions which overwhelm you, and a tendency to view others in starkly black and white terms ('goodie' protectors and 'baddie' persecutors) and addiction problems and a history of depression, feelings of chronic emptiness and a tendency to act out violently under stress.

Maybe you just hated that job. Which makes it fine to quit.

since no one else beat me to it:

the last time I posted a reply to Datalounge (no joke)

Of all the people I have encountered, I strongly suspect a lawyer who is former military. The way he and this other lawyer sold this very very very very very very very very very very ( pretend I kept it going for 100 move very's ) naive old woman's house was outright heartless. They sold it for almost a million and both got like 60k from the sale. What disgusted me the most was how he feigned concern for the woman (she was his client) over a course of a few weeks, but in chambers it was a different story. He basically colluded with the female attorney ( she was attorney for the old lady's brother and it was heir property) to get paid, and then he went out in the audience and continually told his client " the judge is seeing things our way" or " oh I stuck it to em in there" . He barely spoke a word in opposition to anything !!!!! In fact , neither one actually argued anything in chambers or at the bench. They both were trying to agree on a price most of the time and file required agreed orders . That poor woman even gave him a bonus when she signed the damn final agreed order , and she was almost in tears thinking this dude fought on her behalf. He rode that damn concerned/zealous advocate train to the bank . Also, he tried to argue w/o his coat on a once after he saw the judge allowed me (i was just an intern at the time) to address the audience w/o one. A seasoned attorney knows better. The day i saw him do it, I immediately thought he did it just to see would the judge reprimand him (she did ofc). Also, a few times he would do very subtle things just to see how people would react. He calculated things and he changed his dialogue/questions to suit the person. I'm not talking about when making oral motions or at a hearing, but socially. He was well-rehearsed while doing any form of law. Socially, he was a covert provocateur. I was convinced he was some type of sociopath from watching how he treated his classmates (usually using someone else who he knows will bring up a sore subject for someone he dislikes) and clients ( always being some overly concerned, jovial and reassuring) but in chambers purely strategic ,focused only on his objectives like his decisions affecting their lives didn't matter. He only cared he won and if he could piss off (subtly ofc) other people in the process the better. After a few months of seeing the cycle, I honestly thought he was the Ted Bundy of lawyers.

I deal with sociopaths and personality disorders all the time because I represent people who have had their kids taken away by the county. It probably will not shock anyone that this kind of person tends to come to the attention of Children's Protective Services. They tend to run through court-appointed attorneys rather regularly because, of course, they think they could not have done anything wrong and it was the kid's/social worker's/other parent's/society in general's fault. When you try to reason with them or even explain the situation they tend to go off the deep end and start blaming the lawyer too.

I've worked for someone like this. It's dismal but fascinating in some ways.

A couple quick examples:

He sought suggestions for a site to book airline tickets. I suggested Kayak. Remarkably enough, about 15 minutes later someone comes over to where we were and asks for a good site to book airline tickets. He leans back a little, voice and head raised just a bit (it's an air-of-authority thing some folks will do) and says, "I use Kayak."

Some of us were talking about how much we drink. I said I have my share overall, but it's via 2-3 drinks at night a few days a week, that I used to drink more, but I'm done w. getting drunk. He said yes yes same here, getting drunk is something to grow out of when you get to be 30, etc., etc. A couple days later he commented off-hand that he and his cycling group got together every Saturday and drank 'til they were wiped out.

I could go on for the rest of the weekend w. stories like that, stories of severe professional incompetence and a torrent of lies to make excuses.

It's essentially non-stop, reflexive lying for image enhancement.

One thing I've been curious about: It seems like it must consume a lot of energy and mental focus to be so attentive to image, ways to improve it, belittle other people, etc.

What the fuck has happened to DL. My daily run ins with sociopaths use to be here. Now there seems to be a bunch of bad spelling, straight sounding women spitting their stupid opinions at me. Where are the grammar police and bitchy queens? It is all over DL now that they changed it all. Fucked it all right up.

They're here R28, they just don't want to talk to you right now.

Great story R27. I worked with a sociopath a few years back. Could not stand her. One day we had a face-off, because, well, we had to. We were about to spend two days together with twenty students on a trip we were supervising. Anyway during that conversation she mentioned a guy we both worked with. Said he was great, she loved him, etc. Within the same conversation, twenty minutes later, she mentions him again and says she hates him. That's when I knew she was crazy.

Six months later she stole my job (which I wanted out of), then herself resigned (I had stayed for two years at said job, she stayed 8 months).

One thing she did all the time, is suck up to anyone with perceived authority. This she did without fail. Always very obviously, but at least everyone knew what she was doing.

One sociopath acquaintance has made a career out of pretending he's a medical doctor!

Because he is so charismatic, he always get away with it for a few years until his own behavior (but never his made up credentials) makes his employers suspicious. He never works directly with patients as he says he graduated from a foreign medical school. Instead he gets important administrative positions.

Recently, he was CEO of AID Atlanta for a short period. I don't know the details, but he left that job by stating publicly that he needed a liver transplant so had to quit (who quits a job when you need the health insurance??!). His liver is of course just fine.

I think it was just a a way for AID Atlanta to save face for hiring the liar.

R28 most if not all of the "grammar police" AKA "grammar cunts" are on some many ignore lists that they seldom bother correcting grammatical errors.

I've had plenty of experiences with psychopaths, sociopaths, schizophrenics, Boderlines, Histiornics, ect...

Oh the stories I could tell...

Please do, r33. Which was the worse to deal with?

[r34] the psychopath. he was truly the craziest most evil person I've ever met.

He tried to get me involved with some scam he was setting up, luckily I backed out when I figured out what he was doing. When I rejected him he became really hateful and nasty.

But he truly was a master manipulator, even with his shady criminal past, he has many people who admire him.

OP all you need to do is run a DL search on "Kevin Trudeau"

Come to Broadway

I've encountered my share of sociopaths (or at least people who behaved like sociopaths). It's not exactly rare to encounter a sociopath these days, when you consider that many sociopaths will be people who know how to "blend in" and present a certain likable facade that seems normal. Many sociopaths are not the type who will exactly commit murder - their unethical, callous and illegal behavior will often be more covert...often much more covert. They also seem to reserve their worst behavior for people whom they consider "weak", or "unimportant"/low-status, or people who "disrespect" them or otherwise fail to stoke their ego. God forbid that you be two out of the three: i.e. both low-status, and unwilling/unable to stoke their ego to their satisfaction. Then it's open-season.

There are a lot of people who will be evil - as long as their evil is sufficiently hidden from public view, and as long as they can get away with it without suffering undesirable consequences.

Sociopaths seem to proliferate on the Internet - i.e. in the "Comments" sections of various blogs/articles, or on message boards. For example - just read the callous, cruel comments that some people post (not just here).

Then you have those who are on a mission to advance their agenda (or advance themselves) at the expense of other people, or at the expense of the truth, or at the expense of authentic discourse. Their modus-operandi involves deception, dissembling, obfuscation, manipulation. I read through a lot of "Comments" sections these days and rue how sociopaths (or the representatives of sociopaths) have ruined them.

Sociopaths abound in the corporate world and in government - so pretty much all of us are impacted by them in the most insidious ways.

R37 - are you saying that Broadway, of all places, harbors many sociopaths?

I'm trying to figure out how to make this really long story as short as possible.

My partner was trying to relocate to my area and he found a job that sounded ideal on paper but I recognized who this person was and strongly advised my partner against taking the job.

Well, he did anyway but he's extremely competent in his field and was able to stare down the sociopath. The eventual faceoff was us buying out the business, the sociopath trying keep control of all the physical property he SOLD us and us totally divorcing ourselves from any of the sociopath's business dealings along the way .

We won on many levels but if you want to know the true definition of a sociopath it's the idiot who SOLD us his files and enough evidence of business fraud to land his sorry ass in prison if we were of the same sociopath "fuck you" mindset that he was.

If you want to know why we didn't it's because we're not sociopaths. Not worth the time.

R40, you should have turned those papers over to the cops. He is going to move onto someone else to prey upon.

Sociopaths seem to get people on their side through charisma and making people feel he's a quick friend .

Exactly R42.

Years ago a new guy and his wife moved into our building and immediately started glad handing the other residents and made themselves the most popular people in the building. Then started blasting their music at all hours, smoking and selling weed, letting their three dogs bark all the time and shit on the lawn.

The wife would befriend kids in the building and convince them to take care of the dogs so she could sit on her fat ass watching TV. She'd get the old lady across from me to do their laundry as well, making promises to repay her favors but never doing so.

Anybody who complained would immediately be targeted by them--tires slashed, garages broken into bad mouthing to other renters, etc. They started telling everyone the property owner was a convicted sex offender. I think that was the last straw for everyone.

Eventually when the neighbors got fed up with them and the property owner had enough complaints he evicted them. When evicted they "accidentally" started a fire in the kitchen of their apartment and then sued the property owner for having unsafe living conditions.

R42 -- and then the sudden devaluing sociopaths do to lovers and friends is hurtful .. or at best puzzling.

You never get a reason why.

They just move on to the next friend/lover/spouse/victim.

Once you get burned by your first sociopath, you never forget it.

Fo-sho!

A plug for a good book to read

Or, perhaps better for the layperson -

Its almost DL tradition to brand anyone who is a crazy asshole as a 'sociopath'. Sociopaths are not as obvious as you think. For example, R20 sounds more like a borderline to me.

R27 is the most accurate description of one. They aren't always evil and obsessive like psychopaths or destructive and melodramatic as borderlines, they usually fly under the radar. For me, the best analogy I can think of is that they are like aliens wearing a skin suit. They lie about everything, the most mundane, unnecessary things and desperately attempt to appear human and 'normal'. The few I've encountered were blandly pleasant (the 'charismatic' thing gets overhyped, they are more sneaky and less obvious that the 'charming psychopath' stereotype). Most people didn't even notice their destructive tendencies until their lies caught up with them and by then they've moved on to the next group. They are not usually the people you think 'oh god she/he was a nightmare' or 'a nutbug', they are more just plain odd and difficult to read (because of their lack of emotion and empathy). There is always a 'blankness' about them. And like R28 says, they prey on people they view as weak and 'not normal', hoping to put all the attention on them and away from their own 'weirdness'.

It seems like the ones who are successful (not always) have a certain element of some type of dysfunction. I am now on the lookout for these types. And somebody up thread cited sociopaths can be found in business and government.

I can't give any details unfortunately even though the event is literally history. But there were 2 senior public servants (one very high up) - close to a country leader who was finally "outted" for his nefarious dealings. He was forced to resign immediately. The lower level guy (but with connections and power and influence) who ingratiated himself with senior guy was ALL CHARM. He turned the tables on me with regard to a travel advance (saying I had misrepresented the use of funds or whatever), and fired me (I went bankrupt and lost my home to foreclosure) and if that wasn't enough had me investigated by top police enforcers (sorry, trying to keep this vague) with regards to his advancement of funds to me so I could book flights/hotels etc.

It was a nightmare. Person in question is still employed, got a promotion. My only solace is I never have to see or deal with him again. I do remember how he conducted his staff meetings. Since the work involved huge sums of money, and therefore secrecy from all staff, he threatened that if word got out about the project, he would track the person and made to feel the full force of the law.

Nah r41. This wasn't a police matter. They guy was no danger to society. He was fudging technical data and so good at it that no one could actually prove he didn't actually run the test studies he claimed to have done...except us who had his own words on paper that he'd faked the numbers.

He actually was quite brilliant yet so stupid at the same time. Ratting him out would have only taken down a lot of good people with him who've since become our own clients and friends so it would have done more harm than good.

Here's the definition of a sociopath. They can't put themselves in the place of others or grasp that screwing someone over isn't an accomplishment to brag about. We've righted a lot of his wrongs along the way and built a good business in the process.

Cops or most lawyers would never have understood. Our clients do though.

Yeah, a lady named Brenda I worked with at Head Start. She decided immediately that she didn't like me (I took the job that she'd driven some poor 19-year-old out of because she couldn't keep her pre-menopausal hands off him) and set to planting evidence to get me fired. She was abusive to the kids and would leave things like bleach and knives out where the kids could get them. Brenda also hated one of the supervisors and I would see her plotting things to get at her. One day, for instance, the supervisor was at the water fountain. I saw Brenda at one end of the hall looking at the supervisor, considering her carefully, then grabbing the closest kid nearby and running at full speed down the hall. She then plopped the kid down at the fountain and loudly announced that the supervisor had "cut in front of" the little kid and how rude and awful she was.

It all backfired when she had hoarded paperwork because she didn't want me to get credit for doing it, but she'd done it all wrong AND had tricked the office into scheduling me as a bus monitor on the day of the state evaluation. The state pitched a fit about her fucked-up paperwork, and I couldn't be blamed as usual, plus the office figured out she'd messed with the bus scheduling on purpose. They didn't look at her the same afterwards.

I also found out that Brenda had lost her nursing license for some unspecified reason years earlier, and her presence was enough to keep then-Secretary of Education Donna Shalala away from our school. The Secret Service wouldn't okay Shalala visiting us as scheduled even after they sent Brenda home.

She works at Hospice now and two of us on a local forum recounted our issues with her, and how we knew she'd been reported to the state multiple times, and the Hospice threatened to sue us. I had to get a lawyer who sent copies of my report to the state as well as some other info to the Hospice, and they backed off their threats, but I notice that every review of their Hospice House gets wiped from the 'net. I think she's still there even though I know this Hospice has written documentation proving she's been reported to the state before. Scary.

[quote]Once you get burned by your first sociopath, you never forget it.

Once you realize he IS a sociopath you never forget it. And then you learn to watch for the signs. Starting in 2010 I worked for an attorney who was one. Like all socicopaths, he found the chinks in my armor and exploited them, and because he'd been doing it for so long he was good and it took a while for me to realize who he really was. My coworkers knew, of course, because they'd been there longer and had seen him in action. He told me once he'd say or do anything it took to get what he wants. I went to management time and time again about what an asshole he was and they refused to do anything about it. I asked to be transferred off his desk and each time I did they told me if I couldn't handle working for him then I needed to just quit the job, which I wasn't about to do. It took me almost four years to find another job.

About a year before I left I finally found a law firm partner who was willing to listen to me. When I told her what he was like she was completely surprised, because she saw what he wanted her to see. He kissed the asses of the partners and the clients and treated the staff like shit. I pointed that out to her and told her to talk to other staff members and ask how they felt about him, she told me later that they all had the same stories I presented to her.

He was asked to leave the firm because they audited his billed hours and found out he'd been padding them. They told him he could leave quietly or they'd report him to the local bar association. Working for that asshole did so much damage it took almost two solid years of therapy to learn how to undo the damage.

[quote] I also found out that Brenda had lost her nursing license for some unspecified reason...

Ding Ding Ding! There are many, many sociopaths in the nursing profession!

R39, I meant mostly HER

No...others should be warned. It's my duty.

I was friends/associates with a guy in high school who I now suspect was a sociopath. At the time I didn't know a lot about sociopathy so I just assumed he had some sort of personality quirk. He was very meticulous about his appearance which I thought nothing of because I was just as meticulous, except I'm gay and he was a straight guy. Every single hair had to be in place.

He was very outgoing and made friends quite easily ( he had a huge, diverse group of friends/associates). However, his emotions never appeared genuine. Whenever something bad or tragic would happen I noticed that he would observe others in order to gauge their reactions before reacting himself. Even then there was something disingenuous and off about his reactions. He would also make very intense and bizarre eye contact and watched everything you did.

The biggest thing is that everything around him would always turn to shit. He hurt so many people, destroyed friendships, broke into a neighbor's house and convinced his brother to take the rap, suspected of drugging his girlfriends bestfriend so he could sleep with her which destroyed their 12 year friendship, broke into the principal's car and stole money...on and on.

Whenever he was caught doing something horrible he would always attempt to lie and manipulate his way out of it. He would always characterize himself as the victim and never took full responsibility for anything he did wrong. He would always attempt to blame someone else for his actions and choices. Most of all he never seemed to learn from his mistakes; he would repeat them over and over again. He never changed his behavior even when he was fully aware of the consequences for his actions. I now suspect that his meticulousness and outgoing, nice guy persona was a manipulation. He had many people convinced that he was a " nice guy."

More...

My mother. I have disowned her, and not before time.

We shared maple lattes.

Just an FYI for anyone who suspects there's a socio/pscho path in their midst. Google "gaslighting." Here's just one reference.

Always a pleasure to see a picture of Ingrid Bergman, thank you R60.

You're welcome R61. I rented the movie after I got gaslighted.

I once met this guy named John from Canada, wanted to know if I needed any used textboooks.....

Sociopaths otherwise known as bisexual men.

R64, not.

Most bisexual men are so freaked about their "in-between" life, they could not be crazy.

Just nuts. Not actually crazy.

[quote]He was very outgoing and made friends quite easily ( he had a huge, diverse group of friends/associates). However, his emotions never appeared genuine. Whenever something bad or tragic would happen I noticed that he would observe others in order to gauge their reactions before reacting himself.

My dad's a narcissist -- clinical -- but he would do this too.

At a family gathering or social occasion, he would make a beeline for any infant and make a show of cuddling it. "Look, look," he would demand, pantomiming what I guess he thought normal people did over a baby.

When I was about 12, a friend of the family died unexpectedly. The rest of us were in shock. Dad caught my eye. "Look, Brian, look," he said, pulling his mouth into a frown and tapping under his eyes, miming tears.

[quote]"Look, Brian, look," he said, pulling his mouth into a frown and tapping under his eyes, miming tears.

Your dad's an asshole.

No kidding, r67.

TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF R66

The head of finance at a place I used to work. She was the most coldly manipulative person I've ever met. Very charming and charismatic at first but I cottoned on after I was working late one night and went up to her department to leave a file for someone. Her office door was ajar and she was berating someone so I tried to just nonchalantly wander past to see who it was. It was the cleaner. She was literally hissing through clenched teeth at the poor woman, saying she was so unimportant the rats wouldn't even eat her corpse if she was killed that night. The cleaner was in tears. I backed out, came in again this time pushing the door loudly, putting lights on etc., until I got level with her office and shouted "Hi Denise! Still here? You work far too hard! Just leaving this for so-and-so..."

The cleaner slunk out, sobbing and hiding her face. Cunty McBitchface-Crazyhorse called out for me to come in, grab a coffee with her. All smiles, not a trace of discomfort. I said I'd got to go and left as quick as I could. I saw the cleaner in the foyer, sobbing and scared. She had a bright red slap mark on her face but she was too scared of losing her job to report it. She told me she got abused regularly and the cleaners tried to avoid being alone in that department.

I left soon after. The senior management knew what she was doing, not just to cleaners, but they did nothing. Always wondering about why they couldn't hold onto staff. I actually think they were scared of her. Before I went I told the MD what was going on and I heard a few months later that she was gone. I don't think it was down to me, more maybe an accumulation of stories leading to the realization that somewhere down the line there was going to inevitably be a lawsuit.

I posted about this once here, and the entire thread was full of people saying "if he was really a psychopath you'd be dead now," and "you are not a psychologist, you can't diagnose people with that" and "what are these supposed 'traits' you claim to be seeing"

Can we split DL into two - like where 1 group passes an IQ test w/ general knowledge questions & another can just stab the blunt edge of the sword into each other for eternity?

Oh i forgot the thing with the traits - someone posted "everyone acts like that once in a while - maybe he was having a bad day."

My ex definitely fell somewhere along the spectrum of sociopathy (psychopathy/antisocial personality--they're all the same thing). He could talk friends into joining him in sadistic or meaningless but hurtful things to ruin other people's lives, even in the smallest ways if that was all that was possible. I should have known something was up when he and his girlfriend would make fun of me for thinking things they did that were mean to people weren't funny. He'd make up names for people usually about them being fat or to perpetuate some rumor about them. He'd retell stories in way to make people seem ridiculous like a very racist of retelling of a girl who "needed to get back to her roots, and we're not talking Kunta Kinte," or "two fingers" (the girl who needed 2! tampons because her vagina was so large and gaping."

I let it slide thinking this must have been the climate at their school (I was from another town). He was very smart, salutatorian actually. He stole the valedictorian's speech and incorporated tell-tale elements of her work, so that when she was up after him it would sound like she had stolen his speech.

He confided in me that "he and his sister" had plans to get his mom new carpet by breaking the water dispenser on the refrigerator. I told him that was insurance fraud and he laughed it off, saying he was joking and the fridge had just been acting up lately and he made up the idea (no doubt talking bad about me with his girlfriend and evil mother--his sister was actually just young and impressionable). Well, believe it or not, that very thing happened to the fridge 3 months later and there was the 2 month period in which all of the carpet had been ripped up waiting to be replaced from the insurance company.

Let's see, then there was the time that he found out an older professional man in the area was secretly gay. He somehow leveraged this to get a job for the guy (I wonder if he didn't fuck him, too). He stole the man's disability sign for his car (all the while making fun of the "fat fuck"), but when confronted by him, lied and half-buried it in the parking lot after the next rain so it would be found.

There was the time that "this guy" in Dallas that he had talked to on gay.com a long time ago (this was the late 90s) promised to give us porn if we came up and visited. Turns out we were expected to fuck him. I ended up being talked into having sex in front of this guy (which was as far as that was ever going to go), but I have a feeling we were recorded surreptitiously. Fortunately, the film has never surfaced.

Then there was the time that I got an inkling that he was cheating on me. I caught him emailing a man at his prospective college about staying overnight. He was, of course pissed about me being nosey, but I played along and decided to join them for the weekend. There was no sex, though the guy made it obvious that this was an expectation--rubbing on us after getting us drunk. The BF denied ever cheating but I know he did.

It was murder trying to break it off with this guy. It was always something about me being crazy or whatever. I had pretty low self-esteem after having been chubby at a younger age and having been outed to my family by my ex girlfriend (which fucked up my life for a few years). FINALLY, I got out of the relationship, but I still feel ripples in my current relationships--I am not as kind or as trusting as I once was. Fortunately, I became a mental health professional and am now doing much better. I won't diagnose him (he's not my client), but he had some of the traits and I hope he's gotten some help.

Do the anti-Semites that pollute Datalounge on any and all threads count as sociopaths or just pathetic, obsessed losers?

Anti-semites? There definitely are some. Being racist or ethnocentric is not necessarily an indication of sociopathy, but it COULD be a marker. It is more likely an indication of unacknowledged feelings of/fear of inferiority and difference.

I think r75 is right. The two don't preclude each other but race problems always rise in times of austerity. It's all good when the honey is flowing then when times get tough it turns tribal and you hear "get back to where you came from" a lot more often. Everyone wants their share of a dwindling supply of work and money for their own family / tribe / race / religion. Resentment of outsiders becomes more prevalent, the worry that those dirty Jews / Muslims / Mexicans / blacks / Indians / insert scary ethnicity here are getting your share.

Thank you R73 for sharing with us the fact that you are just another fat gay therapist, but this is not AA dear

Ha. That's funny r73. It's not AA, it's datalounge, so I guess I should call you a cunt, right?

GD R78, rather. Your pussy still stinks.

My uncle is one. He's currently in prison for Murder.

Did anybody ìn Canada follow the Colonel Williams bust? He was the high ranking pilot who was in charge of a military base (and was so esteemed by his superiors that he even personally saluted and flew the Queen around) but was given a life sentence for at least 1 if not 2 murders plus many instances of sneaking into Ottawa area homes and modelling and phograph in himself in women's lingerie. Took a long time and detective cunning to capture and get a confession.

That was one strange/demented guy. What would be classified? He was also married to an executive, had a beautiful home in Ottawa and cottage on the outskirts.

He sounds hot R80, What prison is he in? Do they do Conjugal Visit there?

FYI, the Russell Williams at R81 is ugly as shit. Like, really ugly.

Well, also a sick fuck.

This is how the Canadian military dealt with this headcase:

The Canadian Forces stripped Williams of his rank and medals and later dishonorably discharged him. Before his discharge, he was visited and examined by a military doctor in Kingston Penitentiary, as all outgoing military personnel must undergo a medical examination. Williams' uniform was burned and his medals were also later cut into pieces, his commission scroll (a document confirming his status as a serving officer) was shredded, and his Pathfinder was crushed and scrapped.

R83, he's no Matt Bomer but I wouldn't say he's 'really ugly'.

R85, your standards are really low. I would never be even remotely interested in anyone with that face.

Besides, that uniform and everything on it has been burned to the ground.

I didn't know Canada had a military

R86 =

NEVER get mixed up with a Hungarian, Australian, Guatemalan, or Gypsy

Thank you R84- I just wonder if he was also ever formally "Assessed" with regard to psychiatric disorders this thread has been discussing.

What an awful waste of lives (victims); his own life and reputation plus the supposed happy life he had built with his then - wife.

I know or recall reading somewhere he tried to kill himself in the first few hours after he was charged with the murder (s) by stuffing tissues down his throat to suffocate himself but was 'rescued' just in time.

Adding to R90's list, stay the fuck away from Croatians, they're fucking insane!

Add Turks to that list r92.

I WW'ed R49 because I think I know who he is -- I followed that drama in the news as much as I could when it was going down. Your boss screwed a lot of people, my friend. I can't believe he's still working.

R20,

It's not "sad" this so-called "friend" died.

It's wonderful.

One thing that people need to realize is that you don't let someone as described in this thread do destruction to yourself. Those people are sick. But, not just sick, they are evil.

R20,

I used to think they were just evil, as in having no conscience. Now I know part of their make-up is sadism.

They actually like to hurt people. Some do it with weapons, some do it with emotions and the mind.

I haven't met any President yet, but If I did I would have met another one.

Yep, met many sociopaths. I have met many policemen thugs, military terrorists and the like who don't give one goddamn about the abuses of power and outright murder they commit. I met Rahm Emanuel, too. Truly a sociopathic Zionist whore.

People who are filling a gap in their lives who join the Police are usually have low self-worth which they raise through control of others with their responsibilities and weapons. My brother joined the Police in his mid-30s and it has exacerbated every insecurity into a blustering obnoxiousness and every uncomfortable thought into outright paranoia.

r49/r94 - are you Australian?

More stories please...

"What the fuck has happened to DL. My daily run ins with sociopaths use to be here. Now there seems to be a bunch of bad spelling, straight sounding women spitting their stupid opinions at me. Where are the grammar police and bitchy queens? It is all over DL now that they changed it all. Fucked it all right up."

Boy, you sound like an asshole of epic proportions. If Datalounge is "fucked up" it's because of mental defectives like you.

I hate how that one asshole makes it so we can never be trusting again, R73.