Help Me Marry a Nice Gay Doctor, Queens!

You are tedious OP.

The desperation of wanting to date a doctor so bad is probably obvious and turns them off.

And if you do manage to do it, you'll see. Lots of people think they would like to date a physician...until they actually date a physician.

Be prepared to only see them at their convenience and when their schedule allows. Also deep down, they will always think they are better than you.

Eh, I dated a doctor for a while. We ended it when he got a job in the States and I didn't fancy moving countries. The one thing that I remember about that relationship was the one fight we had where I accused him of thinking he was better than me and he broke down (I mean, really "holy shit, he's crying his eyes out") and bloody screamed at me that my "normality" was what kept him grounded. We didn't talk about what he did at work, but given he worked in paediatrics, I guess he saw some horrible abuse cases. Then there was the woman I worked with who "landed" a plastic surgeon and ended up putting up with five years of constant "now, if you got those boobs/that arse/those lips/that vagina/that forehead seen to..." Made her fucking neurotic.

I met my SO when he was 19 and I was 24. I had just gotten my masters and he was in the first college class I ever taught. He was determined he was going to get into medical school and he did. The thing is, EVERYTHING in our lives as a couple was about him getting through medical school. Then it was about his residency, then in was about his start up cardiology practice. The next thing I knew I was forty and my entire life had been about furthering someone else. My SO had become so used to me putting his needs first that it shocked him when I started asking him to take more time away from his practice. He loved what he did and it made him happy. In the end, I just couldn't take it anymore. We lasted sixteen years. At dinner parties I joke and say, "If you're going to live with a doctor, live with a podiatrist. They aren't on call twenty-four-seven."

You really want to be nagged to do the extremes for your health constantly?

You want a man who never risks and always tsssks?

Pfffft ... no thanks.

Accidentally tumble down your stairs and you can have a meet-cute with a handsome young resident at your local ER.

You know the difference between a doctor and God?

God doesn't think he's a doctor.

You csn't start a relationship with a doctor by being their patient! Not only can fucking patients cost them their lisence, the doctor-patient relationship is all about the patient's needs and believe me the doctor doesn't want to continue that into their private life.

No, the doctor wants a relationship that's all about his needs, as a break from work

OP, stop watching those reruns and whacking off over Clooney.

Yeah, it's really not all that great. My coworkers that tried dating them said it sucked due to the schedule and how busy they are and some of them do have massive egos. The reality is a lot more different than the dream.

Fellow gays, have you learned nothing from straight woman? If you want a doctor, you become a nurse.

Do male nurses successfully land doctor husbands? That sounds like a stretch.

I was a male nurse and I landed a hot foreign husband with an amazing body and huge dick and amazing personality. I'll take that over a doctor any day.

Most male nurses I know get lots of action.

I am a gay doctor. Happily married and in my 50s. The majority of young doctors (late 20s - early 30s) are closeted as the profession remains horribly homophobic. Be prepared for him not being out professionally and keeping you secret from work. Now, the majority of young male doctors that are single have little time to develop relationships so if they're gay or flexible, they're pretty easy to score for casual flings. Start hanging out in hospital cafeterias, particularly at dinner or late night when they are on overnight shifts.

I wondered about my doctor if he is gay. He is very handsome Italian American guy, 55 years old and he got married but some months later there was no wedding ring on his finger I guess he got a divorce? He is a doctor for sports people. He is very nice to me. I got a vibe he might be gay? what do you think?

I had a few doctor fuckbuddies, and one doctor boyfriend. Make sure you get a jewish doctor if you want an affective relationship not an arrangement.

[quote]Make sure you get a jewish doctor if you want an affective relationship not an arrangement.

LOL. My mom would say the opposite. My mom was very pretty, and my dad was a resident about to make a ton of money back in ~1970 - so it was pretty much an arrangement. I am not sure if they ever liked each other.

I grew up with a father who was a doctor. He's 65 and still in practice - and still on call. They have a lot of stress, naturally. I can't imagine living with a partner who has that much going on. My mother complained about it for my entire life (but she loves to complain). The easy access to prescriptions is fantastic, though. If you are sick or have migraines or whatever - there's no endless waiting & paperwork to go through to get a pill. In the last 10 years, the rules have gotten more strict, and my dad generally won't write for anything that another doctor hasn't previously written for...basically, just to fill in for something between visits. He has to keep a chart on me now, too. He will never write for benzos or opiates for me, and generally for most patients he avoids it since all the controversy with those.

Oh look at me getting carried away with my pills... that's another thing you might experience.

BTW, my dad is overweight & has diabetes. Doctors don't always take the best care of their health. His brother is also a doctor who is in much better shape generally (and exercises), but he's still somewhat overweight.

I had a couple doctor fuck buddies, but I could tell they couldn't really be in a relationship. They barely had time to be fuck buddies.

[quote]I am a gay doctor. Happily married and in my 50s. The majority of young doctors (late 20s - early 30s) are closeted as the profession remains horribly homophobic. Be prepared for him not being out professionally and keeping you secret from work. Now, the majority of young male doctors that are single have little time to develop relationships so if they're gay or flexible, they're pretty easy to score for casual flings. Start hanging out in hospital cafeterias, particularly at dinner or late night when they are on overnight shifts.

Sorry I know you probably get asked this the second you say you're a gay doc but how often does anything sexual happen with your patients? Meaning do you ever see boners? If you are a doctor who does testicle check-ups etc that is.

If ypu want to meet doctors, become a pharmacutical rep.

R19, not an MD but an NP here. I give physicals all the time. I've only seen erections rarely: one was a teen with mental retardation/developmental delay that I had to give a bed bath to in nursing school, and the others were men that I had to do something with their foley catheters. These were all inpatient. Never had it happen to me outpatient and the only patients I ever have hit on me are women, though I wear a wedding ring so maybe that's why.

I am now picturing the OP sashaying past the queue of hungry night shift docs at his local hospital, and throwing his faves a penetrating backward glance. Be sure to bite your lower lip seductively as you do this, OP. Those closeted docs will be reeling from exhaustion so leave subtlety at the hospital gates.

The OP thinks he Iola from "Mama's Family"

[quote] Never had it happen to me outpatient and the only patients I ever have hit on me are women, though I wear a wedding ring so maybe that's why.

It's probably you're not attractive enough.

[quote]not an MD but an NP here.

We want to hear from actual doctors.

I only dated a doctor once. It was more than enough. He was so entitled and arrogant, he would get into actual fights, once even physical, with waiters and sales clerks when we went out.

He let me know what an asshole he was so often, I just didn't show up for a date one night and it was over.

I met another doctor a few years later and didn't let anything even get started. He couldn't believe I was breaking up with him. He was A DOCTOR. Didn't I realize what a catch he was?

I just walked.

Poor R13...foreign?

Lots of great responses here.

Just to be clear: no one wants to date an asshole. But the cocky, know-it-all, superior Alpha male personna that a lot of doctors have: THAT'S part of the appeal of dating one! I like smart, cocky take charge men.

R21, thanks for sharing. I was afraid things in real life aren't as bonery as at Nifty.

Briefly dated a cardiologist last year but he worked anywhere from 60 to 90 hour weeks and with that kind of schedule naturally didn't want to do anything on his time off. Just not the kind of lifestyle I wanted. Nice enough guy though.

When I was a patient, a hot, hairy, handsome Italian intern cruised me during Grand Rounds. I recuperated at his apartment. He decided on a "bread and butter specialty," dermatology. No one will wake you up at 3:00 AM to cure their zit. We were together three years.

[quote]He decided on a "bread and butter specialty," dermatology.

Dermatology is one of the most competitive specialties to get into because it has such a great schedule compared to most specialities, and it is still very high paying.

Lots of people would like to go into dermatology, but only a small few can. You have to crush the step 1 exam.

r19 - I'm a geriatrician. I really don't care to see my patients naked (although I do) and they tend to be past the ability to have erections. One of the reasons I went into it is minimal call, 50 rather than 90 hour work weeks, and minimal competition. Gives me time to be a normal person and not married to the job. Lots of gay and lesbian folk in geriatrics.

You want to marry a nice gay doctor? Live your life first! Do everything thing you want to do, now! Wait until you are upper 40s, then follow the good doctor's advice at reply 15.

I'm not a doctor, but I play one on DL.

R15 are his initials RP and from Brooklyn?

R25 is Dr. Scholls good enough for you?

Dermatology, Radiology, and Rheumatology are 9:00-5:00 practices. Any others?

I'm sure there are a number of nice gay doctors in Queens. You don't need our help.

You better pick one in a lifestyle specialty or else it's going to be all about THEM and their career. Being a doctor's partner is tough and the relationship is usually on their terms.

r38 - Ophthamology, Geriatrics, Physical Medicine and Rehab, Endocrinology, Podiatry are all pretty tame hour wise.

I work in pharma (yes Im the worst blah blah blah) and the hot gay doctor is a rarity. So good luck with that OP.

See I like men who are full of themselves. Provided they are as hot shit as they think they are, it's a turn on.

Meh. I dated a surgeon about 10 years ago. He was cute, and really hot, but had no manners. He was from a really small town in the Midwest. He was intelligent as hell, but socially inept. He showed up for a dinner date with a dryer cloth stuck to the back of his shirt (he worked 60 hours a week, so I get it). He also chewed with his mouth open while eating. The nail in the coffin was when I brought him to a party, and my African American friend asked what he did for a living. He said “I don’t think you would be interested” and walked away. I was so embarrassed.

Dr. Susan Lowenstein can hook you up with one of her gay colleagues.