The most miserable time in your life

During my 20s. I was a doormat and plenty of people knew where they could wipe their feet.

Right now. I have had repeated (nearly 10) surgeries to fix one botched procedure... that has basically left me with a body part that may be deformed for the rest of my life - all because the first doctor fucked up.

These revision procedures have gone on for 6 months, I've gained 20 lbs during the process because it's hard to really exercise or do much with an open wound and stitches, repeatedly. Now, I finally have the last set of stitches out - and I look like Frankenstein. They say that I'll look "better" in a year, but if these fuck ups never happened... I never would've had to endure all of this. It's been hell, and I am not sure how I am even getting through it - I've had to go on multiple psychiatric drugs.

Hang in there, R2, hate hearing that. Pain trumps every other problem. Hope the worst is indeed over.

Thanks R3. I hope so too. Most of it is on me now to use the skin expander device & see if I can get back to normal without a skin graft or more surgery.

Jan-Feb, 2014. Over a period of 24 days, my father died, my uncle died, my father's best friend (who was like an uncle) died, and my mother dislocated her hip -- twice! I left my mother's bedside, following hip surgery, to drive to my father's hospital, across town, in order to remove him from life-support (per his advance directive) and sit vigil. That was some pretty fucked-up shit. And I was dealing with it alone, as my brother was stuck on East Coast due to a series of bad storms. I'm still not sure how I made it through that period with my sanity intact.

R2 can you post a picture?

middle school, 1987-1989. everybody knew I was gay but I hadn't yet found the footing to tell them to fuck off.

The years when I was 12 and/or 13.

Agree with OP: NOW. To a hideous extent. Sigh. Up to me to change things...

High school. Bullies at school, plus emotional, and sexual abuse at home.

The only bright side to all that is that adulthood has been a total breeze by comparison!

2011 1990

The most miserable time in my life was from 7th to 10th grade. I was a homely, terribly shy, late-bloomer.

1981 was also hard because I had a suicidal depression. I couldn't seem to make myself do anything.

Late 2014/early 2015

I got screwed over by a friend who turned out to be a scam artist and legit psychopath. Then 2 family members passed away within days of each other, then I had a serious health problem that didn't get healed until recently.

I'm still trying to clean up the mess of last year.

Wow. What's the story, r11? Break-ups?

I'd say the panic I felt after my first layoff in 2001.

When my mother died.

About 20 years ago. Within one week, I was diagnosed with cancer. My dad (who was my best friend) died (I was glad only because my cancer would have freaked him out). I was fired and expelled from school (for being a whistleblower about grant fraud -- I subsequently won a False Claims Act lawsuit). I was evicted from my campus apartment (since I no longer qualified for it). And my "friends" scattered because they were afraid they, too, would be expelled. I remember lying in bed after these seven horrible days and wondering if life was worth living.

Within a year, I was healthy again. I was enrolled in a better PhD program from which I graduated three years later. I had a wonderful job (one of the university philanthropists knew about my whistleblowing and brought me in as a consultant for his foundation; I subsequently worked my way up to president). And I found true friends.

It's horrible when bad things happen. But, given time, things turn around. I know that the bottom could drop out again but I also know I'd just need to work my way out of the hole again. The critical thing is making sure that you are always doing the right thing even when it would be easier to do otherwise.

I wish everyone here who is going through tough times the very best.

R18, your story gives me hope. My condolences to you in your loss of your father. I am glad you are doing so well!

2016. Three family members died in short succession and I had an awful break up with the total asshole I was dating at the time.

R18 your story is inspiring. Glad you’re having better times.

OP, you poor deprived baby!

Chemotherapy

Mid 1979 to early 1980. Screwed by what should have been my own kind due to reverse sexism from a nasty lesbian.

right now

divorce and corona virus and moving back to flyoverstan