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Memorable Tea Rooms of the 70's and 80's

Bloomingdale's? Hotel Pennsylvania?

The most shocking was one of the first I discovered as suburban teenager: downstair's Men's Room off the Waiting Room at Grand Central.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 35410/12/2020

Not New York, but Atlanta in the '80's: The mensroom in the Atrium of the Georgia Pacific building was notorious for business suit jacking off and cocksucking. Two rows of stalls which faced each other, doors open a lot something dirty going on. Same with the Macy's mens room both downtown and in Buckhead, and the Sear's mens room at North Lake Mall.

by Anonymousreply 108/25/2015

B. Altman and Company, Fifth Avenue and 34th Street. And btw, Benjamin Altman played for our team.

by Anonymousreply 208/25/2015

Grand Central's Waiting Room in the Original Post is now called Vanderbilt Hall, an event space,

by Anonymousreply 308/25/2015

OK, but why "memorable"? What made these tea rooms more remarkable than others?

Grand Central was memorable to me because there would be handsome grown up darker men (black and hispanic) at the urinals stroking massive schlongs. I was young, grew up in white suburbia, and it was way before I had access to porno. I was floored, weak in the knees, that there were men who looked like that!

by Anonymousreply 408/25/2015

strawbridge mens room in center city philly.

by Anonymousreply 508/25/2015

lots of action then

by Anonymousreply 608/25/2015

Where are the current tea rooms with action?!?!?!

by Anonymousreply 708/25/2015

Stupid me hoping for an erudite discussion of tea rooms past.

by Anonymousreply 808/25/2015

Me too R8

by Anonymousreply 908/25/2015

Grand Central was incredible. Worked part-time back in the late 70's to mid-80's. There was a bank of about 6 telephones on the wall at the top of the stars, always ringing. Once, out of curiosity, I answered one; a man on the other end invited me for sex. Of course I went. When I arrived at his office, his secretary said, "Yes, he will see you now." I went into his office, met a hunky man in a white shirt and tie. We stripped, sucked, jerked. Shook hands, and I left. Marvelous experience. I answered a few others, but they were flakier.

Also, met a man in the men's room, who took me up to the 4th Floor of Grand Central, where there was a stair leading up to an abandoned tennis court, actually 2 courts, with several additional small rooms. It was clear the place was popular, because there were discarded tissues all over the place. We got it on, and I later took someone else up there. After a few months, I went back there, but the doors to the stairs had been locked with a chain and padlock. So that was that.

Met a number of men in the men's room itself, or cruising upstairs in the waiting room. The actual downstairs men's room was vast, with a long bank of urinals, all next to each other, with no partitions, as well as a double row of stalls. There had even been dressing rooms, with a shower, sink, and a cot, meant for men to freshen up between trains. Made me wonder what kind of action that area had seen over the years, especially in wartime, when the place must have been crawling with anxious, horny servicemen.

by Anonymousreply 1008/25/2015

the old days

by Anonymousreply 1108/25/2015

ahh the good old days, the good old days.....everybody's talkin bout the good old days.....I remember the urinals in the Men's Room at Grand Central were probably from the 30's. White porcelain and went right down to the floor, which seems odd because you end up splashing on your shoes and pants legs. Guys are notoriously sloppy pissers!

by Anonymousreply 1208/25/2015


by Anonymousreply 1308/25/2015

I went to the grand central urinals once, not knowing it was a notorious tea room. I was amazed at how open everything was

by Anonymousreply 1408/25/2015

i loved it

by Anonymousreply 1508/25/2015

Marshall Fields on State Street, that great street.

by Anonymousreply 1608/25/2015

NYU had a building on University Place, two buildings, actually, that connected with bridges. I took an Italian class there Sophomore year and was surprised to discover when I went in to a stall to pee that there was a huge glory hole in the wall and someone staring at me through it while I was pissing. I recognized him from another class and I was so startled when I saw him, I reared around and peed right into the hole. I zipped up, went back to class, and I guess I had an odd look on my face because my Italian teacher asked if i was okay (in Italian, of course) and I had zero idea how to respond in kind.

by Anonymousreply 1708/25/2015

A young, tiny, fey, south american professor of mine sucked me off and swallowed my cum for 1/2 a semester through a campus glory hole, before one day in class it suddenly occurred to me it was him. I would never have wanted to do it with a professor but he obviously knew all along it was me. I turned bright red and he gave me a slutty smile. The rake!

by Anonymousreply 1808/25/2015

Second floor restroom at George Washington University, one of the classroom buildings had a outer door, followed by a corridor to the inner door. It gave warning for anyone engaged in illicit activities. It was very busy in the early 80's. Nowadays I wouldn't think of doing this in the age of cell phones, webcams, hidden microcameras, etc.

by Anonymousreply 1908/25/2015


by Anonymousreply 2008/25/2015

Tell us more R18!

by Anonymousreply 2108/25/2015

You boys were brave.

by Anonymousreply 2208/25/2015

SAKS Manhattan mens room.

by Anonymousreply 2308/25/2015

R10 I didn't know about the tennis court in Grand Central. I had a few trysts with a tall ginger 30-something Madison Avenue ad man from that tea room. I saw him after work and if it was after 8 he would take me back up Madison to his office and we'd fuck on the floor. Cleaning lady saw us a number of times and he said he gave her presents and she kept her mouth shut. I was early 20's and wearing my Brooks Brothers high-water sack suits, and even bow ties and searsucker and white bucks in the summer. I had grey and blue and pink seersucker suits, I was such a twerp. Another guy looked like Udo Kier. He was clearly about 50, hung like a horse, and had a insouciant devilish look about him. He would lead me down into dark metro north tunnels. I can't believe I went with him the first time but after that I trusted him.

Another memorable one was under the boardwalk in Brighton Beach. It was vast, completely post apocalyptic destroyed and very punk early 80s feeling. I bet it was a long ago changing and shower rooms or something. I would hook up with hispanic boys and they took me in there and it reeked and was rather exciting and dangerous feeling.

I never found a tearoom in Paris, so made do with a typical cruisy spot - under Quai d'Austerlitz along the Seine. These was a vast dusty colonnade and french boys taught me a lot about how to do sleaze with a certain snarly flair.

There were multiple steaming tearooms in Lausanne and Geneva in the 80s, really torrid affairs, for such a discreet and clean culture, going 24/7 it seemed to me. All long sense boarded up.

I never got the opportunity for London cottaging.

by Anonymousreply 2408/25/2015

r24, many years ago there used to be a tea room in the park behind Notre Dame.

by Anonymousreply 2508/25/2015

I played touche le kiki at the pissoir in the Jardin de Lux but it wasn't a tearoom proper.

by Anonymousreply 2608/25/2015

I preferred mine outdoors: Fort Tryon Park in upper Manhattan. There were all kinds of open-air structures that served as tea rooms. I had some wonderful encounters in them woods!

by Anonymousreply 2708/25/2015

Do trails count? Stanley Park is known t o tourists, but locals know that if you go off on certain paths, especially back in the late seventies and early eighties,, they were hook up spots. A beautiful locale.

by Anonymousreply 2808/25/2015

No one said Royce Hall?

by Anonymousreply 2908/25/2015

Well how many people went to UCLA?

by Anonymousreply 3008/25/2015

Outdoor spots obviously aren't tea rooms. But, have at it.

by Anonymousreply 3108/25/2015

My luck I went to a tea room and actually got -- TEA!

by Anonymousreply 3208/25/2015

hmmmm..... Marshall Fields, downtown Chicago. perhaps it was the 7th floor.

by Anonymousreply 3308/25/2015

please explain why memorable.

by Anonymousreply 3408/25/2015

R10 - that was fantastic. More memories, please. Look, I'm grateful for the relative amount of openness and tolerance we have these days and I've made good use out of Grindr and Scruff, but those days of cruising sound so wonderfully illicit with danger around every corner. LOVE the phonebooth thing. Guess guys had to take it on faith they were getting someone reasonably attractive answering? How did that not get shut down the minute the wrong person answered a line? Or did you all use code?

by Anonymousreply 3508/25/2015

No one used code. The phone rang. You answered. A man on the other end of the line would say something like, "How are you?" then would talk about sex, and what he wanted to do. I tried a few now and then, but what I didn't like about them was that you had to stand there and talk out loud, so that all the men passing by you on the way downstairs to the men's room could hear you. Don't remember meeting anyone else that way except the businessman, and I only met him once.

There was a well-populated tea room in the seventh floor men's room at Bloomingdale's. I went there a couple of times, but was too skittish to do much. Years later, a friend of mine I met in Hawai'i told me the perfect way to cruise there was to buy a shopping bag, then have the other man stand in it in the stall, while you sucked him off. Or vice versa. This way, all anyone else could see would be one pair of legs in the stall. Clever.

There were also subway men's rooms that could be extremely cruisy, but very grubby and smelly. Never liked them much, because of that concentrated urine smell. Once hooked with a guy I met in a men's room in Central Park, near the Ramble. He was wearing jodhpurs and riding boots, had just come from riding horses in the park, and smelled like one. That was a turn-on. We were glancing at each other's cocks while pissing. So we went over into the bushes, and had some fun. (In those days, I could show you all the places in Central Park where you could have sex with a man and not get caught, really some astounding places, hidden away between great boulders and such. There were two large flat rocks in the Ramble, surrounded by trees, where men used to sunbathe nude in summer. I tried that a couple of times. Very erotic, but lying on a rock is not the most comfortable of positions....)

by Anonymousreply 3608/25/2015

I love hearing this

by Anonymousreply 3708/25/2015

R36 / JohnSpike - thank you for sharing these wonderful, evocative memories! More of this please, gays of the 1950s-80s!

by Anonymousreply 3808/25/2015

[quote] Stupid me hoping for an erudite discussion of tea rooms past.

Try thinking a little bit about what you just posted here.

by Anonymousreply 3908/25/2015

[quote]the perfect way to cruise there was to buy a shopping bag, then have the other man stand in it in the stall, while you sucked him off. Or vice versa. This way, all anyone else could see would be one pair of legs in the stall.

Funny, this is apparently a trick that's always mentioned on cruising spots. Whenever I see two shopping bags on the floor of a stall, I always wonder if something's going on.

by Anonymousreply 4008/26/2015

it was Macy's - it was BLoomies

It was dark - it was lit

Ah, YES! I remember it well. . . . . .. .

by Anonymousreply 4108/26/2015

When I was younger I was so naive about these places.

I was once in a park in Cambridge, England...sitting on a bench taking it all in and this guy came and sat next to me and started to make conversation...I was chatting away with him and suddenly he said 'You have no idea what this place is, do you?'

I used to go and sit on the piers that jut out into the water in the West Village of NYC, with a good friend, lovely on a warm night, feet dangling over the side, chatting away...with all this activity going on around us. BOY, you'd see the hottest guys, but I just could never get into the idea of public sex. NOT EVER.

I was once taken by a friend to a cruising place behind a beach in Ibiza and there the guys are often totally naked, wandering about and they come right up to you. I was horrified....though I gave it some thought and mental replay later.

by Anonymousreply 4208/26/2015

You old gays were so classy.

by Anonymousreply 4308/26/2015

We enjoyed our first 10 incher(and really thick) in the T-room of the Art Institute of Chicago!

by Anonymousreply 4408/26/2015

I think T rooms of old met some basic hunter/gatherer, searching for danger instinct in men. The need to explore an often unfamiliar world filled with both risk and excitement. Stalking your prey... or being the prey, all the while knowing the 'real world' was just outside the bathroom door.

by Anonymousreply 4508/26/2015

At least we weren't entitled and oblivious, R43.

by Anonymousreply 4608/26/2015

[quote]I think T rooms of old met some basic hunter/gatherer, searching for danger instinct in men. The need to explore an often unfamiliar world filled with both risk and excitement. Stalking your prey... or being the prey, all the while knowing the 'real world' was just outside the bathroom door.

Or, it could have just been the great sex.

by Anonymousreply 4708/26/2015

Forgot to mention my most important experience of all. In the summer of 1966, I went into Pittsburgh with a younger friend of mine, for shopping and a movie, so we went to "Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?" at the Stanley Theatre, a cavernous movie palace that is still there, though now refurbished for concerts and under a different name. Like all good upper class boys, we wore jackets and ties. About midway through, I told him I was going to take a leak. To get to the men's room, you had to walk down a long flight of stairs, then entered a lounge with chairs and ashtrays, and then the actual room itself, with a line of full-length urinals, as well as about 10 stalls. So I pissed, then washed my hands, and went out for a smoke. While I'm sitting there, alone in the place, a man comes downstairs, 3-piece suit, trimly built, maybe late-30's, and wearing a black eyepatch. He goes in the washroom, then washes his hands, comes out and sits down in a chair nearby, lights a cigarette, and we converse. I do not remember what we discussed, but I do recall that palpable feeling of mutual male interest, hanging in the air. After 2 or 3 cigarettes each, with no one else coming down, he got up and went into the washroom. After a moment, I followed him, and stood with my back to the sink next to his, as he combed his hair. He put his comb in a pocket, looked at me, and grasped by crotch with one hand. I was trembling slightly, but took hold of his. We stood there like that a moment or so. He asked me to come back to his nearby hotel. I declined, mentioning my friend. Then he looked at the doorway, still no one else coming down, and gestured to the stalls. I followed him almost hypnotized by this grown man wanting me. We went in the stall, closed the door, and jerked off. He was uncut, which I loved, but mine was bigger. He asked again about my coming back with him., but again I declined. Then he said, "Tell me when you cum." I had to ask him what he meant by that. I'd never heard that expression before. He explained. I nodded. Shortly after, we both shot into the toilet bowl. Then we came out, washed our hands and separately returned to the theatre. I told my friend I had been smoking. When my friend and I were leaving, there was Mr. Eyepatch, lighting up again, at the exit doors. We ignored each other.

I was 17.

Years later, in the late 60's, I was going with my family to the Greater Pittsburgh Airport, now long demolished, and swore I saw him again, this time dressed in slacks and a zip-up jacket, but he still had that eyepatch. I was too nervous to go into the same waiting room, where we were waiting for passengers to disembark. I never saw him again, or anyone who looked like him.

But I still jerk off about him, and that enthralled feeling I had with him. I continue to imagine what we would have done in that hotel room, and all the sex we would have had buck naked together. I imagine trying to stay in touch with him, getting mail from him at prep school, with occasional stolen encounters as I got older. Of course, none of that happened. But the thought of it still arouses me.

Ah, youth!

by Anonymousreply 4808/26/2015

He wrote memorable but meant memorial. Those people who did that in the 70s and 80s got the AIDS and died.

[quote]OK, but why "memorable"? What made these tea rooms more remarkable than others?

by Anonymousreply 4908/26/2015

[quote]Then he said, "Tell me when you cum." I had to ask him what he meant by that. I'd never heard that expression before. He explained. I nodded.

What expression were you used to? And how did he explain it to you?

by Anonymousreply 5008/26/2015

When our dicks want big old lips

Where else would we go but Phipps?

From the top floor to the bottom

If you want fags, Phipps has got 'em!

Down at Phipps your dick is hung

Ask today for a Phipps-a-tongue

First on your list of sex stops

It's P-H-I-P-P-S shops

hen we go on shopping trips, where else would we go but Phipps? From the top floor to the bottom, if there's bargains, Phipps has got 'em! Down at Phipps, your credit's great. Ask today for a Phipps-a-plate. Ask today for a Phipps-a-plate... Ricky, Fred, and Ethel: (singing) Put...

by Anonymousreply 5108/26/2015


good one !!

by Anonymousreply 5208/26/2015

I actually forget what he said when I asked what he meant by, "Tell me when you cum." But I got the sense of it. Maybe he said, "shoot," or something like that. Certainly didn't take long to do it, that's for sure. We both came fast, him with his back to the wall, straddling the toilet bowl, and me facing him. We didn't kiss, or do anything with our mouths, actually. It took me years before I could kiss a man, I was that closeted.

No longer, buddy....

by Anonymousreply 5308/26/2015

My teens/early twenties in NYC encompassed a lot of the places already mentioned here: Macy's, Bloomingdale's, the Chelsea Piers and Columbia University which had a couple of buildings that were fantastic for glory hole sex. Not to mention it was the heyday of the Mineshaft (although I only went was definitely memorable).

by Anonymousreply 5408/26/2015

Filene's Boston, 7th floor

by Anonymousreply 5508/26/2015

I'm neither R46 but thanks for playing, enjoy your trip down anonymous cum crusted memory lane.

by Anonymousreply 5608/26/2015

R56 protests too much!

by Anonymousreply 5708/26/2015

Just once R56.

by Anonymousreply 5808/26/2015

My first time was when I was 16 years old at the Buffalo public library men's rest room. I first realized all the activity were hook ups. Initially I thought it was so exciting, and my first (out of a total of three) encounters was a brief suck off from a milquetoast middle aged married man. He was balding and stocky and had no personality. I met two other guys there but the excitement wore off quickly and i never entered the restroom again.

by Anonymousreply 5908/26/2015

I should add, this was in 1980.

by Anonymousreply 6008/26/2015

What ere the other encounters R59?

by Anonymousreply 6108/26/2015

[quote] and the Sear's mens room at North Lake Mall.

Different mall, but the men's room near the hardware / major appliances at my local Sears were cruised by men while the frau and kiddies shopped for school clothes or bedding. I scored a LOT of cock at Sears back in the day.

The men's room at Higbee's was pretty active, too.

by Anonymousreply 6208/26/2015

R62 Tell us more! Give us the hot stories about hot daddies getting off while their fish shopped.

by Anonymousreply 6308/26/2015

Their Fish...God your a piece of shit R62.

by Anonymousreply 6408/26/2015

God, I LOVE all these recollections. Especially 'JohnSpike's". They almost make me wish I were alive then! You guys make it sound like a world of gay sex was beckoning at the outer edges of everyday American life. This is our history, boys!

by Anonymousreply 6508/26/2015

I love how prissy R56 and R62 is with his disdain for all things this thread... yet it can't stay out of here!

by Anonymousreply 6608/26/2015

That should have read R56 and R64 who can't help itself but read on and on!!!

by Anonymousreply 6708/26/2015

What can I say R67 I love hearing old queens talking about their good old days...emphasis on the

by Anonymousreply 6808/26/2015

[quote]God, I LOVE all these recollections. Especially 'JohnSpike's". They almost make me wish I were alive then!

Then you're deluded.

[quote]You guys make it sound like a world of gay sex was beckoning at the outer edges of everyday American life. This is our history, boys!

I'll put it this way, you're a lot better off today.

by Anonymousreply 6908/26/2015

The other encounters were as "memorable" as my first one. All married, very average guys, with average looks and average cocks. None of the encounters were "hot", like some of the descriptions on this thread. There was no "connection", they all seemed like androids rushing to bust a nut. None of them had any personality. My second was a middle aged bottom who presented his hole while he grabbed the partition, kind of a bossy bottom. That wasn't working so he told me to "lick it," I started for his cock and he said, "No, in the asshole." I shook my head-no fucking way and started to leave. He relented and said, "Okay, suck me off." At this point I was a little pissed off. I felt he was trying to take advantage of my youth and inexperience- what seasoned individual would just start rimming him in a bathroom stall. I was about to leave and then decided to stay and suck him off., not because i wanted to but because I was just resigned to stay. He did that annoying thing were his shoved my head against his cock (held my head really tight) , I could still taste the residual of some of his come when I pulled away from his didn't taste good. The third time was an average good looking guy in his forties. he just wanted to suck me off. He was the best experience of the three; he wanted to kiss me after I sucked him off (snowballing). That experience lasted the longest. I stopped after three-the thrill was gone and I wasn't attracted to middle aged guys. I would have been thrilled if i met up with a guy my own age or in his twenties.

by Anonymousreply 7008/26/2015

London, 1966

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 7108/26/2015

[quote]I'm neither [R46] but thanks for playing, enjoy your trip down anonymous cum crusted memory lane.

Oh, so you're just a miserable, judgmental little cunt.

by Anonymousreply 7208/26/2015

LOL I'm not going to lie, I have my moments R72. But it could be worse, I could be a geriatric, glory hole geezer fondly recalling all the anonymous cum he's guzzled back in the golden age of cruising.

by Anonymousreply 7308/26/2015

Ugh. Fuck off, R73. These gents are being good enough to take us young things on a walk down memory lane. I find these stories fascinating and (occasionally) hot. Please keep the memories flowing, eldergays and ignore this bitter person at R73.

by Anonymousreply 7408/26/2015

Hey, buddy, I got laid a lot back then, and still do today. I keep myself fit, and I'm a top. Tops are always in fashion.

Let these nay-sayers poo-poo my past. They'll be old soon enough, and crocheting Tom of Finland pillow covers.


by Anonymousreply 7508/26/2015

Yes we all get there eventually but you'll always get there first.

by Anonymousreply 7608/26/2015

[quote]Hey, buddy, I got laid a lot back then, and still do today.

But now you find your 'friends' online, right?

You sound like quite a catch, buddy...hahhahhaha

by Anonymousreply 7708/26/2015

I like them

by Anonymousreply 7808/26/2015

One of the men's rooms at Grand Central Terminal is still very cruisy. I interrupted two men playing last night. One a youngish guy, who ended up getting on the same train as me, and the other an older Asian guy.

Penn Station also has a very active men's room. The last time I was there the attendant was watching all the action and not stopping it.

by Anonymousreply 7908/26/2015

When we were 13 we were already cruising parks and T-rooms for sizemeat!

by Anonymousreply 8008/26/2015

Cruising for dick is cruising for dick regardless if you're trolling online, on Grind'r, in a bar, the park, a tea room, or a bath house.

Never got the "high & mighty" homos who got all pearl clutchy about it. Apparently, they meet all their men at church choir practice...

by Anonymousreply 8108/26/2015

Roosevelt Hotel

La Vista Hotel (pre 9/11 WTC)

PATH train concourse exit bathrooms (pre 9/11 - young attendant loved sucking dick)

by Anonymousreply 8208/26/2015

How do you know you're not heading toward your version of that which you describe R73?

Judgmental people are usually hypocrites.

by Anonymousreply 8308/27/2015

I was so naive in 1982 Bloomingdales NYC... about WHY so many shopping bags in the stalls. My friend Frankie later explained to me that the trick would stand in the bag so there were only one pair of shoes viewed from underneath. Genius queens!

by Anonymousreply 8408/27/2015

I've never cruised and I'm in my 40's so I think I can safely say I'm not going to take it up

by Anonymousreply 8508/27/2015

I love the chase

by Anonymousreply 8608/27/2015

I was always too shy to actually cruise but I did seek out quite a lot of the cottages (British term for Tea Rooms) in my area and London in general when I was in my teens (in the late '90s), like a kind of pilgrimage. I still think of them in a kind of romantic way (yes, I know that romance, strictly speaking, is the last thing that occurred in any of them) and it's great reading about people's actual experiences.

Has anyone seen the documentary film 'Tearoom', about the 1962 crackdown by Ohio police, where they secretly filmed all the goings on in a local tea room and convicted a lot of the men who did anything there, ruining their lives in many cases? Some of it is on youtube...

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 8708/27/2015

Yes its am important documentary about gay history.

by Anonymousreply 8808/27/2015

Taxi Zum Klo was restored and rereleased a few years ago.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 8908/27/2015

The law library at 120 Broadway -- construction workers and lawyers in three piece suits.

The men's room at the Path station in the basement of the old World Trade Center.

by Anonymousreply 9008/27/2015

"Lord knows at least I've been there, And I'm here! I'm still here! Look who's here!"

And I saw the original cast of that show, twice.

by Anonymousreply 9108/27/2015

I once was driving from tampa to Chicago in a futile attempt to reconnect with an old boyfriend,and I pulled into a truck plaza somewhere in Georgia to gas up and take a break. I was wearing skin tight pink cords and a white satin collarless shirt,and when I walked into the store/restaurant,a hush literally fell over the entire place. I was a brash young thing,so I immediately went into a deep bow,and the room exploded with laughter ! Long story short,I hung around for a couple of hours,sucked off no less than 3 truckers and got fucked by 2 others ! Theres no doubt in my mind I could have gone all night tricking one right after the other,it was one of the wildest experiences I ever had .

by Anonymousreply 9208/27/2015

[quote]And I saw the original cast of that show, twice.

I'm so envious of you for that (and your other posts in this thread).

by Anonymousreply 9308/27/2015

R92 is now the mascot for caftans and earrings.

by Anonymousreply 9408/27/2015

Id PROUDLY sport them too,R94 ! Im not ashamed of being effeminate,wasnt then, Im not now. I always laugh when gay men try to act like being a flamer is a BAD thing,I bet you I got laid a heel of a lot more than 90% of you all !

by Anonymousreply 9508/27/2015

guys will be girls

by Anonymousreply 9608/27/2015

And I bet all of them were on your back squealing like a big

by Anonymousreply 9708/27/2015

When I was in college at the University of Pittsburgh, late 80s - early 90s, the mens rooms on the 2nd and 3rd floors of the Cathedral of Learning were VERY cruisy. There was one large one (3rd floor, I think) that had two rows of stalls that faced each other - maybe 20 stalls on each side. The doors to the stalls had been removed at some point (I assume in an attempt to discourage all the sexual activity). These areas of the cathedral were generally very quiet and were, in some respects, the perfect place for anonymous sex.

by Anonymousreply 9808/27/2015

Dumb question from a young'in, but where does the term "tea room" come from? Why "tea room"? I get "cottaging" for the UK because a lot of those public restrooms looked like little cottages. How does a large public restroom represent a "tea room"? Or was it an ironic sense of humor being displayed? The way, when I lived in a crummy studio apartment right out of college, I'd welcome tricks to my "summer home".

by Anonymousreply 9908/27/2015

r99, maybe the Tea is reworking of T, short for testosterone? I know I've been to orgies where you can feel it in the air.

by Anonymousreply 10008/28/2015

Like most other words in the homosexual vocabulary, the origin of tearoom is unknown. British slang has used “tea” to denote “urine.” Another British usage is as a verb, meaning “to engage with, encounter, go in against.”

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 10108/28/2015

I assume it's the same irony in the term "cottage" (most toilets referred to as cottages look absolutely nothing like actual cottages, quite the opposite). A cottage is a beautiful, almost quaint thing usually the province of the staid upper middle classes and higher; tea rooms are quaint places where one drinks tea, a refined place some might say - it's a subversive attitude to call them that, given how most people who live in cottages and who frequent tea rooms would view such activity. And both are very amusing terms in that context.

by Anonymousreply 10208/28/2015

Cottaging is a UK gay slang term referring to anonymous sex between men in a public lavatory (a "cottage",[1] "tea-room"[2] or "beat"),[3] or cruising for sexual partners with the intention of having sex elsewhere.[4][5] The term has its roots in self-contained English toilet blocks resembling small cottages in their appearance; in the English cant language of Polari this became a double entendre by gay men referring to sexual encounters.[6]

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 10308/28/2015

Deering Library on the Northwestern University campus in Evanston Illinois.

by Anonymousreply 10408/28/2015

Another widely-held belief is that the "T" in T-room stands for "trade," as in the so-called "straight" trade who were just there to get serviced.

by Anonymousreply 10508/28/2015

I thought the "T" in "T-room" stood for "toilet." Short for toilet room.

by Anonymousreply 10608/28/2015

r103 Please don't quote wikipedia. Only idiots take that site as gospel without reservation. They even have a page on wikipedia with a vast list of all the hoax entries and pages on wikipedia, which were completely false, and some of which were up for years before being found out. The history and origins of polari is almost impossible to know for sure. Many of the books on it seem to disagree with and contradict each other on many points. And on top of all that, the supposed widespread use of polari amongst gay men at the time is highly exaggerated. Certain basic words passed around word-of-mouth and very few were well-versed in it. Much has been made up in recent times, too.

by Anonymousreply 10708/28/2015


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by Anonymousreply 10808/28/2015

UGH. R108, that short film is intolerable and ridiculous. Seen it posted elsewhere. While the usage of polari is fascinating, that hugely exaggerated example is just too much.

by Anonymousreply 10908/28/2015

its just a gag to illustrate the vocab and shit. not expected to be realistic.

by Anonymousreply 11008/28/2015


by Anonymousreply 11108/28/2015

Bump for old cruise

by Anonymousreply 11208/28/2015

Colleges, libraries, college libraries, department stores,'s a huge list. And then there were highway rest stops -- and truckers! Those were the days...we called them the 70's!

by Anonymousreply 11308/28/2015

And now we're stuck cleaning up the mess you 70's cum dumps made.

by Anonymousreply 11508/29/2015

R115 hateful. I did a 1000 tearoom hookups and don't have HIV if that's your point.

by Anonymousreply 11608/29/2015

115, you made me laugh. Go ahead and blame us for a virus that we had no knowledge of. Let's also blame all those people who went to public swimming pools in the days before polio. We had to spend years cleaning up after those no-goodniks.

by Anonymousreply 11708/29/2015

If horror movies have taught us anything it's that the sluts die first.

by Anonymousreply 11808/29/2015

That is a luxurious looking public restroom. But how in the world did the seats work? Did you lift them up off the benches?

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by Anonymousreply 11908/29/2015

It seems like in the '70s, MOST public restrooms were t-rooms by default.

It's hard to understand if you weren't there.

by Anonymousreply 12008/29/2015

While I remember all the fun I had in tearooms, I also remember being arrested at both Penn Station and the WTC PATH station for public lewdness, while doing no more than standing at the urinal, looking around. It was an easy and time-filling arrest for the cops, but a pain in the ass for me.

by Anonymousreply 12108/29/2015

The 70's sound like they would have smelled.

by Anonymousreply 12208/29/2015

My earliest and best experiences weren't in the 70s, but in the early 2000s. I was born in '79, though, so I guess that still makes me an elder gay. Whatever. University of Pittsburgh Cathedral was great. It still gets action, by the way.

Schermerhorn 9th floor men's room on Columbia's campus was a revelation to me. The times I had there, the crushes I developed. Absolutely amazing. Now it's locked and you need to know the numerical code to get in, which has effectively killed all action.

Can also vouch for Roosevelt Hotel, and the older Penn Station men's room, which is now in a different location and not as conducive to ogling and stroking. It didn't have dividers a few years ago, now it does.

by Anonymousreply 12308/29/2015

Let's not forget the cruisy gyms and sauna's of the times as well. Not the bathhouses-I am talking the Bally's, the YMCA's, and college gyms. In the early 80's, the open gang showers and sauna/steam area at UGA's Stegeman Hall hall were nototorious cruising grounds, as were most of the Atlanta YMCA's, especially the old downtonwn one off Spring Street (since closed) and the Buckhead and Marietta one's. Lots of married guys getting off with each other. Those were the days.

by Anonymousreply 12408/29/2015

After reading this I'm surprised AIDS didn't appear sooner.

by Anonymousreply 12508/29/2015

Yeah, because HIV is spread through mutual masturbation and oral sex, R125.

by Anonymousreply 12608/29/2015

When I read comments like those of R124 I'm struck at the, well, balls you eldergays had. It's one thing to get off in a well established space for gays - in an alley behind a gay bar, let's say. But to do so in "mixed" spaces like a YMCA or a college campus where you could easily misinterpret a "signal" from a straight guy and/or get caught, arrested, beaten, humiliated? I'm guessing that the danger was part of the thrill? I'd like to think that I'd have had the balls to venture out to these spaces and get some hot D, but I dunno if I would have. I'm in my early 30s and i've been using the internet to meet and hookup with guys since I was in high school - yes, dial-up mode Prodigy and Compuserve got me my first real hook-ups.

by Anonymousreply 12708/29/2015

We thought this would be one thread that would remain fish-free but we can smell their foul presence.

by Anonymousreply 12808/29/2015

Yeah I'm sure all they did was oral.

by Anonymousreply 12908/29/2015

I'm not a fish, I'm a gay man with a modicum of self control.

by Anonymousreply 13008/29/2015

R129, I'm sure that of these encounters we're describing, a lot less anal penetration happened than it did in other places such as bathhouses, bedrooms, hotel rooms, etc.

Most public encounters entail jerking, watching, and if you're lucky, some oral. Quit talking out of your ass.

by Anonymousreply 13108/29/2015

It's still creepy and gross R131.

by Anonymousreply 13208/29/2015

People having hot sex and enjoying themselves?! Eww, gross!

by Anonymousreply 13308/30/2015

It's not creepy. It's hot. And it's a part of our history. I mean that. Societal pressure and the the closet meant that guys had to get it where they could, when they could. It might seem creepy to you in 2015 when - for most of us - living openly is not an issue and finding a hookup on Grindr or Scruff or in a gay bar is not a huge challenge. But, for fuck's sake, get some perspective. God, why are so many younger gays such prudes? ("Same love", "we're just like you"). Or are all these sex-negative responses from the women? I'm a 34 yr old gay man and while the era being discussed is before my time and while I'm not sure if I'd have the guts to be as bold as some of these guys were, I'm really appreciative of them taking the time to tell us about it. If they don't, these stories are eventually lost to time.

by Anonymousreply 13408/30/2015

I'm older than you R134 so don't bother preaching to me about the good old days and the need for sexual expression in a time of repression. Just admit that having sex with strangers in public is a kinky thrill for you and be done with it.

by Anonymousreply 13508/30/2015


by Anonymousreply 13608/30/2015

I get what people are saying about the thrill of the chase.

There are certainly ways to cruise now that are likely safer (both in terms of STD's and in terms of actual safety re: attacks/police) and where you can be far more specific about what you're seeking.

But I am glad I had the experiences I did in my 20s when cruising was my main option. It led me to try a lot of, uh, cuisines I may not have otherwise tried. And I was also able to observe a lot, as a player in public j/o experiences.

by Anonymousreply 13708/30/2015

JohnSpike, are you from Pittsburgh?

I grew up near there and had some of my best experiences there.

The suburban JCP I went to in the 80s remains a place where I had some of the best luck ever. It was a place where I was NEVER in there longer than 5 minutes before something happened. (Sadly it was torn down years ago.)

The Kaufmann's in downtown was amazing for the amount of traffic it handled daily. It's surprising to me that even in the 90s, it was practically a sex club open to the public. These grand marble stalls had no doors on them, and I can remember being there several times where I was sucking one guy off, and two more were waiting behind him for their turns. (Those are the images I play in my head when I am *just* about to cum....)

by Anonymousreply 13808/30/2015

They're "Pee Rooms," not "Tea Rooms."

by Anonymousreply 13908/30/2015

r107 I was there, too, mid-80s!

by Anonymousreply 14008/30/2015

Yep. Born and raised in the Pittsburgh area. I can remember when it was 2 bridges meeting at the Point, not some grandiose "Fountain of the Waters," though I remember seeing the design of it in the Sunday Pittsburgh Post Gazette, when it was celebrating Pittsburgh's Bi-Centennial.

However, despite that one experience in the men's room of the Stanley Theatre, and a later experience checking out the clientele at a gay bar called David's, I've never had much sex in Pittsburgh, though I certainly thought about it. Often, as a teenager, I'd go into the city by myself, shop around, and go to a movie, with no thought of seeking sex. Which was why the experience at the Stanley was so intense. But that never happened again, and I never thought of department store bathrooms.

Back in those days, however, there was a constant undercurrent of homosensuality. Unlike now, men had no qualms about stripping down in locker rooms, or taking showers together. And there was a lot of horseplay before and after, snapping towels, lewd jokes, etc. (I remember at my all-male prep school, one guy saying, when naked in the shower, "Let's play squirrel; grab the nuts and run!") And, wildest of all, at the "Y," which was all-male, the men mostly swam naked, right up until the late 80's, or so I hear. (There's a book about the gay history of the "Y," called "Take the Young Stranger by the Hand," which is pretty dry when describing the "Y's" early history, but gets more specific in its post-war period of increased gay awareness and cruising.)

Interestingly, this aspect of the world of men was never talked about in public, and not even discussed among men. It was just understood that men were more physically open when among each other. I still see the norm that, when 2 men are friends, especially straight guys, they reach a point in their connection when it's OK to be seen naked by your buddy. You don't do anything, but it's understood that it's OK.

I didn't actually explore active cruising, really, until I moved to New York. Then I went to town!

But that, as they say, is another story, some of which I have related here.

by Anonymousreply 14108/30/2015

And check out "The Locker Room," one of the songs from the musical, "Love Life," written around 1948, with music by Kurt Weill and lyrics by none other than Alan Jay Lerner. It includes a lyric like, "Where else can you just be without your clothes on?" An early concept show about relationships, "Love Life" flopped, and the score was never recorded. I only heard this song, because it was recorded by John Reardon ( a gay man himself, though that wasn't mentioned on the album notes) as part of an lp of re-recorded songs, "Alan Jay Lerner Revisited," produced by Ben Bagley, who compiled dozens of these curiosities.

The song is a revelation, and the only instance I'm aware of when such a topic was even mentioned.

by Anonymousreply 14208/30/2015

University of Washington - Kane and Savery Hall basements.

Stanford University - The Quad cottages, the education building and the old wing of Green Library.

Those were the days.

by Anonymousreply 14308/30/2015

R127, yes, there was a thrill, but that wasn't the primary turn-on. The basic fact is THERE WERE NO CHOICES. Gay bars were available to those who lived in or near cities, but they were often raided by the cops, and you also had to worry about being seen going in or out by people you knew, or being beaten up on your way in or out. People's sex drives led them to all of these places that some now might consider gross or dangerous. These places were dangerous, and some bad things happened. But this is an aspect of repression: you were not allowed to be yourself. You were not allowed to be openly gay (or you did at risk to yourself). You were not allowed to congregate without fear. People outside the cities had it much, much worse than within the cities. I think it's important to recognize that, despite anti-gay violence that still takes place, society has moved forward in many ways.

by Anonymousreply 14408/30/2015

We still recall the magnificent and huge sizemeats we enjoyed in the basement T-room of the men's gym at UCLA!

by Anonymousreply 14508/30/2015

Is iDunno still around? Did he survive new new format?

by Anonymousreply 14608/30/2015

*the new format

by Anonymousreply 14708/30/2015

Back in the day, Hunter College restrooms!

by Anonymousreply 14808/30/2015

Someone also mentioned Pitt's restrooms in the Cathedral of Learning upthread....those were OK but you could really only jack off there. By the time I found it in the 90s no stall had any doors, and it would just be an open area where students (and locals) would jack off together - it was damn near impossible to DO anything there. You'd have to take it somewhere more private.

by Anonymousreply 14908/30/2015

Who knew pittsburgh is such a pivot point for gay existence, and data lounge membership? I spent a summer there at Carnegie Mellon. We cruised the gym showers and took it elsewhere for the sex.

by Anonymousreply 15008/30/2015

Ah the good old days where you could spend the day on your knees in a dirty bathroom gargling some strange guys load.

by Anonymousreply 15108/30/2015

For what its worth the university bathrooms were spotless.

by Anonymousreply 15208/30/2015

I feel sorry for the poor janitors that had to clean up all the mo leavings at the end of the day.

by Anonymousreply 15308/30/2015

yes it was drying in yellow streaks down the marble walls

by Anonymousreply 15408/30/2015

r119... thank you for the joke. T rooms were about sex and danger, and a parallel world you could enter anonymously... have some fun, then return to the 'real' world. The death of the closet plus aids means that world is fading away

by Anonymousreply 15508/30/2015

I visited Pittsburgh a couple weeks ago (I am the person who initially posted about the Cathedral's restrooms), and just as an FYI - the downtown Kaufmann's (which became a Macy's several years ago) is closing permanently. They were in the midst of a clearance sale when I was there. (I popped in to use the men's restroom, LOL.)

It really sucks to see that store close.

by Anonymousreply 15608/30/2015

Whatever will you do now R156? Who am I kidding, I'm sure you have spots all over town where you cruise for anonymous cock, maybe you should start a blog.

by Anonymousreply 15708/30/2015

[quote]Is iDunno still around? Did he survive new new format?

I haven't seen him.

Start a thread about New York City life and if he's around, he'll turn up for that.

by Anonymousreply 15808/30/2015

When I was a student at Florida State University in the early 1980s the first floor mens room of the Belamny Building was very active with students and non students alike.

by Anonymousreply 15908/30/2015

124), I remember hearing about how cruisy Stegman was. Most of my friends said the weirdest thing about it was how many married and well-known faculty members would hang out there, all seeming to know full well what was going on and sometimes participating. The other well-known T-rooms were in the Library and in LaConte Hall on North Campus and a few on South Campus. I was never a T-room person myself. I also remember multiple times when people were busted in both the Library and Laconte bathrooms. In one of the cases in LaConte, it was a student and faculty member. This was when Georgia still had a sodomy law (the one that was upheld a few years later in the Bowers v. Hardwick case). Not only did the student and the professor both have to serve short sentences, but the professor was banished from the state as part of his sentence, which was handed down by what passed at the time as a very liberal judge.

by Anonymousreply 16008/30/2015

If you are having sex in a public place where anyone can walk in on you then you deserve what you get.

by Anonymousreply 16108/30/2015

Shithead at R156, it sucks to see the store close because Kaufmann's was a part of Pittsburgh's history and it was a beautiful building.

by Anonymousreply 16208/30/2015

There was so much sex going on in the T rooms of the Beverly Center that normal people were unable to use the facilities to make peepee and poopoo,

by Anonymousreply 16308/30/2015

I'm sure most colleges and universities had at least one cruisy bathroom in the 70's and 80's. Somewhere out of the way and most likely in an older building when men's rooms were more elaborate and usually had some kind of cover or where there were a few seconds of "recovery time" when someone entered the room. If there was any fucking done it was most likely done during a quieter time. In busier times a blow job or a hand job were the most likely happenings. Also campus police back then were not really police in the way they often are today.

by Anonymousreply 16408/30/2015

Considering all the scary shit you can get from oral alone now I'm surprised guys still cruise. There was just an article about another new strain of syphilis that spreads and manifests much faster than the more well known ones.

by Anonymousreply 16508/30/2015

[quote] Who knew pittsburgh is such a pivot point for gay existence, and data lounge membership?

I've lived in big cities and more medium/small ones, and I have to say, the cruising scene is often more rewarding in the smaller markets. Have been in NYC, LA and Chicago for long stretches with my job, and never saw that kind of action.

But some of the smaller cities was like shooting fish in a barrel. Was in a midwestern college town for a year about a decade ago and still can't believe the steady parade of 21 year olds (and hot married guys) I had firing loads on my face during that year. And I am no great shakes - neither a great stunning beauty nor a hideous troll.

Wonder if it's just a matter of, not so many other options so let's go here?

by Anonymousreply 16608/30/2015

[quote] Just as an FYI - the downtown Kaufmann's (which became a Macy's several years ago) is closing permanently.

Yeah, sad to hear (I started a thread on it a while back) but it hadn't been cleaned or painted since Macy's took over and it was dreadful.

They also combined a lot of the floors a few years back.

The great 11th floor cruisitorium is long closed. There was another on the third floor but it's not set up for any kind of easy cruising. Though I did hook up with a beautiful, muscular actor from a Broadway touring company some years ago there. He took me to the "family restroom" nearby and I sucked on his big cockhead for what seemed like an hour.

by Anonymousreply 16708/30/2015

I was talking to an older gentleman a few weeks ago who told me about his many Saturday afternoons spent visiting NYC subway rest rooms in the 50s and 60s. Some were obviously busier than others, but he never had a problem finding sex when he wanted it, even when he was 14. He also said the subway cars were very cruisey with bumping and groping. If two guys were interested, one would follow the other into the rest room at the next stop. He loved it all but felt he wasted a lot of time and never learned intimacy with a man until he was much older. Occasionally a man would bring him to his apartment. He said the sex was plentiful and very erotic. The danger was one part of the excitement but so was a bunch of men enjoying lust and sexual excitement. He was never arrested and he was never a victim of a crime.

by Anonymousreply 16808/30/2015

I'm just not wired to be able to have sex with someone I at least don't know a little, sex with strangers in public just sounds empty and strange.

by Anonymousreply 16908/30/2015

Pittsburgh really was replete with venues for anonymous man-to-man sex. Is Schenley Park, aka the Fruit Loop, still the 24-hour hookup spot it has been for decades? That place was awesome: one road entered the fruit loop, shaded by beautiful trees on either side. As it led up to a cul de sac on the very edge of a forest, cars were parked on both sides of the road with men of all ages leaning against them. You'd find a place to park, go back to the cul de sac, pick a direction, and just start walking down a wooded path. Every 30 feet or so, the trail would twist or branch, and usually there would be a man rubbing his crotch as he watched to see if you would stop or not If you didn't, then the man who had started to follow you on the trail would likely stop, fall to his knees, and wait for the guy to unzip, pull out his cock, and guide it into the velvety, warm wetness of the mouth that was waiting for it... (I know, I know: MARY!). You'd go maybe 30 more feet, and the trail would have crested a hill. To the right was a small clearing, and some college student would be moaning, bent over a fallen tree with some married, downlow steel worker daddy giving it to him, while three-four middle-aged men watched, stroking their cocks all the while. After watching that show for a few minutes, you might walk another 30 feet, and find a nice, slightly reclined tree trunk to lean against so you could people watch.

There would often be some troll on your heels, surprised by your stopping, and none too convincingly try to exude a nonchalant stance not too far away from you, as if he was going to stop there anyhow, and he wasn't actually stopping in the hopes that you were going to give him something to feed on. Fortunately, you didn't have to be a dick about it, as he would get the hint fast, and just move on further into the woods without you. After he leaves, another man steps out from behind the tree he was using as cover, turns toward you, pulls his sweatpants down to his knees, and shows you a schlong that is a good eight inches long and two inches wide. As you close the distance between you, and start to move your hand closer to his cock, you briefly consider whether you will bottom for a complete stranger. But that thought vanishes when he brushes your hand away, and says rather frantically "No, just watch." He strokes for maybe 30 more seconds until his knees are shaking, he throws his head back and grunts while spewing ropes of pearly cum upon the leafy branches in front of him. He quickly pulls up his sweats and makes a beeline for his car, a you watch a strand of his cum bend the branch slightly and then release it with a downward splat onto a limestone rock.

You walk down the hill now about 50 feet and see two decent looking 30-somethings kissing while your troll friend is on his knees sucking one of them, and pulling on the balls of the other one. The one getting sucked removes his arm from the shoulders of the other man getting serviced, and puts both hands behind the troll's head and begins thrusting his cock in and out of the troll's throat. The troll starts groaning and snorting like a pig in heaven, and starts coughing as the man blows his load into his load without any verbal warning. Despite his coughing, the guy getting off keeps holding his head fast to his crotch, and releases him only after his last contraction has past, pulling out of the troll's mouth and revealing him to have spit-shined cheeks with cum running down his chin and tears streaking down one cheek. (Continued)

by Anonymousreply 17008/31/2015

As the grateful troll begins wiping his glasses with a handkerchief, you make your way down the hill to another clearing, but not before giving the second 30 year old guy the nod to follow you. He has on a steelers shirt and jeans and looks like your younger sister's husband (or anybody's younger sister's husband). Late twenties, broad shoulders, bubble butt, the high school jock who graduated five years earlier and hasn't let his body go yet. Of course, he does follow you, then opens his zipper, and offers you his cock to suck. You shake your head, pull out your own cock, and tell him "Your buddy's gone now, time for you to get some dick like you know you want to." He looks at you for maybe a second, hesitates, and then goes to his knees and does his best to get the first third of your cock into his mouth. You end your visit by treating him to his first time getting some dick up his ass. As you’re walking to your car, you’re thinking that this wasn’t bad for a Thursday afternoon, and you begin contemplating whether you will come back after dark when it really gets crowded with “straight” guys looking to get their dicks sucked, or their asses fucked.

These memories brought to you in lurid detail by an elder gay who experienced everything just described. This place was a cocksucker’s dream, with the ratio of those horny blue collar cocks seeking release outnumbering those of us who were the to service them by about three to one. Truly, it was a paradise where supply and demand met regularly, leaving everybody well pleased.

by Anonymousreply 17108/31/2015

R160, you are absolutely right. Stegeman was very well known-amongst students and faculty alike. I won't say what Head of Department was in on it, but we even had sex in his office once. Also, lots of members of the swim team, as the sauna was right next to the pool. There was also an undercover UGA police guy that cruised there-it was interesting that he seemed to particiapate more than arrest people. He seemed to only go after the obvious trolls, but one on one he was keen to show off what he had. There was the high profile one you mentioned in the Library, but with the exception of the all to eager to participate cop in Stegeman, it pretty much remained untouched. Also, as others have pointed out, it was very different-people did not show any shame in wandering around the locker room naked, be they gay or straigth, and there was a lot more sexucal "fluidity", pardon the pun. At the YMCA's, it was like a whole subculture of married men who might self identify as straight but had no qualms about messing about with like mind guys in the sauna. In Buckhead, there was even a father and son-they would not do anything together, but would watch each other do stuff with others.

by Anonymousreply 17208/31/2015

[quote]I'm just not wired to be able to have sex with someone I at least don't know a little, sex with strangers in public just sounds empty and strange.

Actually that was the best part of 'Looking', the very first scene when Jonathan Groff tries to make some conversation with his hook-up in the park.

It was downhill from there, unfortunately.

by Anonymousreply 17308/31/2015

Amazed at how prudish and judgmental the entitled millennials are in this thread (and on Datalounge in general). It disgust me to see them at marriage equality rallies and celebrations saying how hard they fought for equality - when they pretty much walked in and had it handed to them. Back when we were in high school, there were no Gay-Straight Alliances and our 'differences' were not embraced and represented everywhere in the media. Much of the activity described here was pretty much your only option - and, naturally, developed its own subculture and rituals with many of us learning to appreciate it for what it was (which was often pretty fucking hot).

Of course, 'gay' has since evolved and has moved on. And yes, things are better today. But it's also natural to harken back to the way things were with a sense of nostalgia - viewing things through rose-tinted glasses, perhaps. Before relationships and equality, 'gay' used to be all about the sex. Its was secretive, forbidden and one had to be opportunistic.

Many of you sound like pampered, helicopter-parented girly-girls who can't be bothered to look up from their smartphones, know every detail about the Kardashians and go "Ew, gross" at the mention of camping.

by Anonymousreply 17408/31/2015

We should thank you for your service to the gay community R174 All of it I'm sure spend on your knees...Oh and thanks for the plague by the way.

by Anonymousreply 17508/31/2015

r175 "We"? Speak for yourself, moron.

by Anonymousreply 17608/31/2015

I doubt that the people who are coming across prudish and judgemental are actual millennials, r174.

by Anonymousreply 17708/31/2015

I always speak for myself Jackass. I'm not going to applaud some old queen for hating on younger guys for not being thoughtless horndogs with no self control.

by Anonymousreply 17808/31/2015

R174 - I'm one of those millennials, but I'm not a prude and I appreciate the eldergays who are willing to share these memories. Judging [consensual] social-sexual interactions from 30-50 years ago by today's standards is just silly.

by Anonymousreply 17908/31/2015

[quote]I always speak for myself

Then the pronoun you're looking for is "I", r178, not "we". Always a good idea not to pretend to speak for others. Particularly if what you're saying is inane drivel.

by Anonymousreply 18008/31/2015

Are we not even going to pretend that it was behavior like this that led to the rise and spread of HIV?

by Anonymousreply 18108/31/2015

The rise AND spread of HIV. This is a keen intelligence at work...

by Anonymousreply 18208/31/2015

God. All the sex-shaming in here. Guess Larry Kramer does have disciples after all.

by Anonymousreply 18308/31/2015

Not shame just logic, Casual sex with people you don't know can lead to STDs.

by Anonymousreply 18408/31/2015

R181 is one step away from saying that HIV was God's wrath.

by Anonymousreply 18508/31/2015

Don't spend too much energy on it, R183...those who don't learn from history are doomed to repeat it, etc. They'll figure it out eventually.

by Anonymousreply 18608/31/2015

"Amazed at how prudish and judgmental the entitled millennials are in this thread (and on Datalounge in general). It disgust me to see them at marriage equality rallies and celebrations saying how hard they fought for equality - when they pretty much walked in and had it handed to them. Back when we were in high school, there were no Gay-Straight Alliances and our 'differences' were not embraced and represented everywhere in the media"

Millennials? LOL. There are no millennials on the datalounge. You are just an old Republican, lashing out at Repugs favorite target - millennials. Old freepers hate millennials because they are pro-gay.

"Many of you sound like pampered, helicopter-parented girly-girls who can't be bothered to look up from their smartphones"

You sound like an old freeper out of touch with anyone under 90. Young people are more liberal on sexual issues, it's old people who support the abstinence-only shit

by Anonymousreply 18708/31/2015

Last time I checked 10s of millions of straight people in this world have HIV and or have died of AIDS. A virus is not a punishment or a moral lesson or anything of the kind.

I know plenty of DEAD DEAD DEAD fags, dead of AIDS, who were never sluts or tramps. And I know sucking hoovers as for oral, guys who have been hoovering cum orally for decades, who are not HIV+.

DUMB ASS R181 and R175

by Anonymousreply 18808/31/2015

[quote]Millennials? LOL. There are no millennials on the datalounge. You are just an old Republican, lashing out at Repugs favorite target - millennials. Old freepers hate millennials because they are pro-gay.

My god, this troll is like an autobot. Type 'millennial' in any thread and this is pretty much the word-for-word response that will soon follow.

by Anonymousreply 18908/31/2015

I can vouch for R170/R171's recollections.

by Anonymousreply 19008/31/2015


by Anonymousreply 19108/31/2015

r189, old-timers whining about millennials is a datalounge cliche. Whining about helicopter parents is another. Get a more original line.

by Anonymousreply 19208/31/2015

I'm a millennial and I support these criticisms of sex-negative, prudish, judgmental millennials.

by Anonymousreply 19308/31/2015

Many tea room participants did not get HIV/AIDS so stop generalizing.

by Anonymousreply 19408/31/2015

Two Updates:

Actually, the kind of sex mostly practiced in these places was either blow jobs or masturbation, not always mutual. Fucking wasn't done as much, because that took more activity, and you really had to be aware of possible intervention all the time. There were reports of plain-clothes cops everywhere. Fucking just wasn't safe to do. (I used to say that one of the benefits of coming out of the closet is being able to have sex with a man in a horizontal position... LOL) And, since it is fucking that is the primary agent for transmitting HIV, what was done in the tea rooms really didn't qualify for that. So, whoever is blaming the guys in the tearooms for spreading AIDS is full of shit.

Secondly, all you millennial, beware of your own safety. I recently tested negative, again, on Aug. 4, 2015, and had an interesting talk with the RN doing the counseling. Many men seem to want to get infected nowadays; they're even called "bug chasers," and they attend parties, where negative men get repeatedly fucked by positive ones. All this, for the financial benefits they can get if they turn positive. (Talk about "welfare mothers!") This is really disturbing. So many men out there, even now, are refusing to use condoms, and seem to want to be infected. After all the years of working and educating and burying, here are scores of men who actually want to get sick. And, though they include plenty of older men, the majority are much younger, who have no real mental concept of what they're getting into.

Now that is insane behavior.

by Anonymousreply 19508/31/2015

If you were a millennial you'd know that sex-negative and prudish aren't words that characterize the typical millennial. There are people here who continue to try to push the idea that millennials are a bunch of assimilationists who want to emulate heterosexuals in every possible way which makes it clear that most of the people here have never even had any interaction with a millennial. The assimilationists that I have encountered who want heteronormative lives dipped in a bit of gay and who criticize gay pride parades for being too gay and flamboyant have all been over 40. The posters criticizing other posters for their sexual exploits may be prudish and sex-negative but it certainly isn't due to them being millennials.

by Anonymousreply 19608/31/2015

What? No one went to the 8th floor of NBC? Small entrance anti-room leading to large room/w wash sinks, mirrors. Another door led to a room of seven stalls/w doors. Soon as you walked in, if you heard a door bang in the stall room you knew. Often four or more guys there, all business types, workers from in building and out. Went on for several years. Much younger and more handsome guys than Bloomie's tea rooms The Hilton when new, lots of cruising on 2nd floor, up & down escalators. Score, go to stairs for privacy. It wasn't an art, wasn't a science, it's just where the boys were.

by Anonymousreply 19708/31/2015

[quote] Many men seem to want to get infected nowadays; they're even called "bug chasers"

JohnSpike, I've loved your rememberances, but I'm not sure where you got your info. If the RN told you about "bug chasers" she or he should be repeatedly slapped.

Much of the so called info on "chasers" was from a Rolling Stone article from almost TWENTY years ago and the numbers were vastly overstated in the article.

Are there bug chasers? Sure. There are all kinds of self-destructive people on this earth. But let's not make a mountain out of a molehill.

by Anonymousreply 19808/31/2015

Harvard Science Center and Widener Library were popular spots on that campus.

by Anonymousreply 19908/31/2015

Tea Room aficionado here, since 1975, age 14, lobby of the then Sheraton Hotel.

C-floor bathrooms in my college library (those who went there will recognize the reference), New York subways, truck stops, rest stops, rambles, Ptown and San Juan dick docks/beaches at night, Fire Island meat racks, The Adonis Theater, Asbury Park, adult book stores, peep shows, assorted parks, malls and cottages in London, Naples, Copenhagen, Oslo, Santiago, Palm Springs, DC, AC, Philly, Boston and Miami.

HIV negative. Last tested four months ago.

by Anonymousreply 20008/31/2015

sisters who took mega-loads in culo and boca but who never touched drugs(rec or pharma) or never had defective immune systems from birth = No "AID$"

sisters who used drugs (pharma and rec) = a tiny tiny tiny percentage had "AID$"

by Anonymousreply 20109/01/2015

R175 is proof that AIDS has killed all the wrong people.

by Anonymousreply 20209/01/2015

Yeah cause you're still here R202.

by Anonymousreply 20309/01/2015

Boston's Combat zone remember going there as a teen peering in those sex shops, then the Pilgrim Theatre now torn down was crazy action in balconies, everywhere...Horny straight guys all hopped up from the strip clubs would always go to get finished off ..

by Anonymousreply 20409/01/2015

Agree with R198. R195, your RN is a typical shrieking frau who vomited gossip on you that has been repeated so many times it is now taken as fact---"bug chasers are EVERYWHERE, they're all around us." In reality it was probably just a few fucked up people---or maybe no one at all and someone made the whole thing up.

I see this kind of whisper down the lane hysteria ALL the time in my line of work (yes, 90% women). Something happens once to one person, and before you know it the sky is falling. So fucking annoying.

by Anonymousreply 20509/01/2015

Widener was not that popular, although doing it in the stacks was fun because you got plenty of time. Lamont 3rd and 5th floors were big at Harvard. Occasionally the Union back before it was the Humanities Center. Science Center basement was too high traffic and too likely to be policed. Of course anyone sunbathing by the river was usually cruising. The IAB had the freakiest cruising, and some of the house libraries were very active (esp. Currier). I found glory holes at the bathrooms at the glass flowers, and in the law school. Eliot House had the sweetest little room up a spiral staircase from a tiny backroom in their library, but you practically needed a cattle prod to get a trick up there.

by Anonymousreply 20609/01/2015

R201 = Campbell, no?

by Anonymousreply 20709/01/2015

Aside from the RN I spoke with, I also remember a multitude of men I was with in other places, who pleaded they were "allergic" to latex condoms, or said their skin was "irritated" by them. And one or two did mention these "Poz Parties," where negative men would be repeatedly barebacked by positive ones. I attended a few parties in San Diego at one point, where bareback was the norm, though they weren't touted as being intentionally to infect people. A number of the men I encountered were quite blasé about being infected, and had no interest in condoms for anything.

Although, apologies for getting off topic.

Do the trucks or the docks in NYC qualify as tea rooms? And what about the baths? Oh, the tales I could tell about those...

by Anonymousreply 20809/01/2015

Agreed John Spike, these T Rooms and Theatre's , book stores where mostly masturbation, blow jobs, no fucking.

by Anonymousreply 20909/02/2015

[quote]So, whoever is blaming the guys in the tearooms for spreading AIDS is full of shit.

Exactly. I've been sucking and getting sucked in bathrooms (and lots of other places, too) for the past ten years and I've never had an STD, much less "the plague". Will continue getting off wherever I can regardless of what some anonymous prudes on DataLounge think about it.

by Anonymousreply 21009/02/2015

If you're having sex in a public place where someone (not looking for sex) can see you then you deserve to get busted cause that's just gross.

by Anonymousreply 21109/02/2015

The AIDS hysteria is really telling about the posters behind it. Ignorant and homophobic. Two men can have sex anywhere at anytime without risking HIV infection. It's not all bareback anal and wanton free-for-alls. But these kinds of idiots conflate any gay male sexual contact with disease and depravity.

Again: tells you more about them than they realize.

by Anonymousreply 21209/02/2015

R195 is repeating a slur against gay men. The bug cheer myth has been debunked, except outside of right-wing circles. It's also a good 15 years old at this point, so a gay man "just hearing of it" from an RN is a particularly clueless gay man in 2015. R195 is a moron.

by Anonymousreply 21309/02/2015

I think that tearoom activity is still enjoyed by guys of many ages, including this college student who likes to document his exploits on Xtube.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 21409/02/2015

There was a tearoom bust in a town near here and it resulted the local gay bar getting closed down.

by Anonymousreply 21509/02/2015

R214, thanks so much for sharing that. Beautiful stuff. Nothing better than getting on your knees and going to town on a hard, fat dick, burying your nose in a full, musky bush, and knowing there's a chance it could be interrupted at any second by the horrid R211.


by Anonymousreply 21609/02/2015

"There was a tearoom bust in a town near here and it resulted the local gay bar getting closed down."


by Anonymousreply 21709/02/2015

Lol, r217. The crazy things you read on here.

by Anonymousreply 21809/02/2015

Tea Rooms have been in existence as long as there have been cities. They didn't just arise in 1969.

by Anonymousreply 21909/02/2015

And to illustrate r219's point...

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 22009/02/2015

The bar was across from a park and a bunch of idiots got caught by a family fucking on a picnic table, there was a huge moral outcry, the local tv station even did an undercover expose about cruising. As a result cops started harassing the bar patrons, business dried up because guys were afraid of getting caught there and the bar was forced to close.

by Anonymousreply 22109/02/2015

Oh, you anonymous posters, throwing out insults so easily. I could throw a few your way as well. But what would be the point? I've seen what I've seen, no matter your so-called "prudish" responses. And I'm still negative. And, frankly, I wouldn't be surprised if you have a few little secretive behaviors you wish to remain totally anonymous about, yourself. (After all, if you're anonymous, as you are here, you don't have to take responsibility for anything, right?)

by Anonymousreply 22209/02/2015

Doesn't sound like anyone in this tread is big on responsibility.

by Anonymousreply 22309/02/2015

"a bunch of idiots got caught by a family fucking on a picnic table"

Gross. Kentucky?

by Anonymousreply 22409/02/2015

The entire family was fucking on the table?

by Anonymousreply 22509/02/2015


by Anonymousreply 22609/02/2015

[quote] Worse...Indiana!

Speaking of the Hoosier state, I had a rather good blow job at the Flying J truck stop just outside of Ft. Wayne about 10 years ago. Lots of lonely long haulers out there, if you want to experience trucker cock / ass.

by Anonymousreply 22709/02/2015

This is in southern IN, no truck stops around the area.

by Anonymousreply 22809/02/2015

The Pilgrim Theatre in Boston's Combat Zone was fucking sex heaven. Unfortunately, it has been torn down. However, it was one of those old time grand and glorious movie palaces that eventually became a porn movie house. It showed straight porn, but the action was definitely not straight. There were men sucking and fucking everywhere, i.e., seats, balcony, dark corners, etc. It was the glory days. And the men's room was pure raunchy sex. I loved that place. Gay or straight, the men were there to play and have fun. Those were the days. And when it was gone, it was the end of a glorious era. Fuck chat rooms, the Internet and Grindr. The Pilgrim Theatre was the bomb. Bring back porn theatres.

by Anonymousreply 22909/02/2015

The old Boston Public Library was another jack-off jackpot. Just try and get any studying done. And no urinal dividers. As a young man, I loved going to the library and standing at the urinal with my dick out watching everyone cruise and masturbate. I was a horny thing in the '70s. But now, urinals dividers are the decline and fall of Western Civilization. I hate them.

by Anonymousreply 23009/02/2015

We get it, Boston was the place to be for fucking anyone and everyone back in the good old days!

by Anonymousreply 23109/02/2015

Well, it was fun.

by Anonymousreply 23209/02/2015

Re R221's comment.....

I was (and still sort of am) a huge cockpig and I loved my cruising spots. But I never understood the men who would be SO obvious about it in a public park or anyplace where they were fairly close to where children were.

The Internet and sites like Cruising for Sex kind of ruined the underground vibe of many places, because once it was out there publicized, a few idiots spoiled it for the rest.

by Anonymousreply 23309/03/2015

Just goes to show sluts ruin everything.

by Anonymousreply 23409/03/2015

People will always be jealous of anyone who is freer and having much more fun than they are.

by Anonymousreply 23509/03/2015

T rooms have been around as long as cities have been around. Dupont Circle became the gay neighborhood because, when the circle was built, a large public lavatory was built under the center of the circle (the entrances are still there). Gay men started to settle near by because of it.

Outdoor cruising grounds have also been used for generations. When I lived in Sacramento, the levee on the south bank of the American River near the warehouse district was a hopping spot. Per the old guys, it had been that way since at least WW II.

by Anonymousreply 23609/03/2015

Another vote for the Pilgrim theater. What an unforgettable night. Had some mind-blowing sex in one of the side boxes overlooking the auditorium. Never before or since have I been in such a debauched "public" space. In a word, wow...!

by Anonymousreply 23709/03/2015

It's funny that 2 of the main Boston theaters associated with lots of sex had names inspired by the area's puritanical history: the Pilgrim and the Mayflower. I actually saw a revival of "Bambi" at the Mayflower, when I was in prep school, before it veered into porn. I think I may even have seen "Airport" there, which came out in 1970. That may have been one of the last, if not the last, non-porn movie to show there.

During my prep school days, about 30 miles north of Boston, I was much too shy and self-hating to do much of anything in places like that. It was only in the fall of 1968, when I was a freshman at Boston U., that I chanced upon the Esplanade, an expanse of walkways and shady areas along the Charles River, that used to be awesomely cruisy. That's where a plaque should be, you'll pardon the expression, "erected," to commemorate my first blowjob, ever. (I was so horny, I exploded almost immediately, prompting the poor guy to look up and say, "Jeez, you came fast!" as I was zipping up and running away.)

Ah, youth!

by Anonymousreply 23809/03/2015

Prep school...Jeez!

by Anonymousreply 23909/03/2015

But Boston had great gay porn palaces with active back rooms: the Tremont Arts and South Station Cinema. I got caught up in some orgies that involved twenty or more people at South Station. Enough so that I decided I didn't like them.

by Anonymousreply 24009/03/2015

I also cruised the Fens, a park with lots of tall reeds, and little trails to and fro amongst them, located, if you please, across a pond from the illustrious Boston Museum of Fine Arts!

And not so far away from the Huntington Avenue "Y," which had its own history.

I had many encounters at night, in the Fens, which, I understand, are still busy. But I also saw some very dangerous activity, including gun play, which curbed my enthusiasm, so that I pretty quickly stopped visiting it. There were lots of groups scenes there, but also muggers and gaybashers. Met a young man there once who was very angry, showed me a pistol he had, said he was determined to get the black guys who had killed his lover. Seeing this, I pretty hurriedly decided to leave, but heard gunshots as I was exiting the place. Not a great experience.

by Anonymousreply 24109/03/2015

"Love Court" uphill from the Parthenon in Nashville's Centennial Park was a great cruising spot for a time.

by Anonymousreply 24209/03/2015

Guys that are stupid enough to cruise in parks and public bathrooms for sex deserve what they get.

by Anonymousreply 24309/03/2015

You mean mind-blowing, ecstatic orgasms? I agree!

by Anonymousreply 24409/03/2015

Or a vicious beating R244, One of the two.

by Anonymousreply 24509/03/2015

I hope your cunt catches fire and someone stomps it out, R245.

by Anonymousreply 24609/03/2015

That's more likely to happen to you while cruising

by Anonymousreply 24709/03/2015

FF the anti-sex, violent troll at R243, R245 and R247.

by Anonymousreply 24809/03/2015

The violence in this case was directed by a gay man at black guys who he said had murdered his lover. (Although "black guys" was not the appellation he actually used). So, in this case, it was a gay man bashing the gay bashers. Literally. (Though I wonder if he was shooting at the same black guys who were guilty of his lover's death.) But he was so angry, I don't think he cared.

Reminds me, in fact, of the poster in R243, R245, and R247. Very similar rage-aholic.

by Anonymousreply 24909/03/2015

I wanna hear about tea room experiences in Southern California. LA, San Diego, OC. Anyone?

by Anonymousreply 25009/03/2015

Royce Hall and the basement of the men's gym at UCLA were notorious. I was at school in Northern CA and heard all about it even up there.

With all of the young service men in San Diego, you'd think there'd be more action than there is. There's Black's Beach of course but while it's nude, it's not especially cruisy.

by Anonymousreply 25109/03/2015

The Ritz Theater in Tampa

by Anonymousreply 25209/03/2015

Are there any porno palaces left anywhere in the Continental United States?

The last porno palace I visited (and left somewhat of my mark in) was located in Naples, Italy in 2005.

by Anonymousreply 25309/03/2015

Speaking of Italy.....

One of my friends went and said that the scene there is glorious.....there are grottos in many of the towns and during the afternoon break, many men go there to get their cock sucked.....many of them are married and/or straight. He said there were 5 or 6 men for every inverse of what one usually sees here.

by Anonymousreply 25409/04/2015

I used to love the graffiti in our old train station restroom. I was just a little kid, and I didn't understand what half of it meant, but I studied it carefully and recognized that there was something going on there.

My favorite was the one that said "Tuesday 2:30. SHOW HARD."

Did any of you ever actually call any of the "for a good time call 555-1212" numbers? How exactly did that work? I mean, when the phone got answered how did one start a conversation?

by Anonymousreply 25509/04/2015

Once, when visiting Rome, back in the early 80's, I visited what's left of the Circus Maximus, with romantic notions of wanting to see where Ben-Hur raced. (Love ancient history, and though I knew Ben-Hur was a fictional character, I didn't care; it was the Romance of the place I loved.)

The ancient Circus is gone; the stones it was made of were all stolen to make later buildings. (No doubt, if you check St.Peter's carefully, you'll discover blocks from all the major ancient buildings.) The Circus of today has only its shape, of an elliptical arena, with a center section, or "spina." In the 80's there were oleander bushes growing all over the areas of the stands, though not in the original racecourse.

The revelation was that those stands of oleander were quite filled with cruising men, many of them wearing wedding rings. The bushes were tall, and there were many little paths and grottos among them, sheltering couples and groups, doing the usual activities. I was amazed, but didn't do much, having some anxiety about safety among that very mixed crowd. I ended up going back again a day or so later, when I met this hot sandy-haired guy. Nether of us said much until we were finished; I don't speak Italian. Then, when he spoke English, I found he worked in the British Embassy. He was very nice, even showed me some sites I mentioned having an interest in seeing, like the "Bocca Della Verita," a huge circular stone sculpture of a hairy man's face, with the mouth open, seen next to Audrey Hepburn in "Roman Holiday." it was still there, in the same place, and I put my hand in, as she did. Funny. My Englishman was very sexy and very nice.

In years since, I have heard all those oleander bushes have been cleared from the Circus. I can imagine why.

by Anonymousreply 25609/04/2015

Old whore bump.

by Anonymousreply 25709/05/2015

OW! Why did you bump me???

by Anonymousreply 25809/05/2015

I remember one of the malls I used to cruise....the summer between HS and college. There was a beautiful man that worked in a shop called Stylegate. Early 20s, perfect 80s Parker-Stevenson helmet hair.

I remember him coming into the mens room and seeing him pull out the BIGGEST fucking cock. Huge. I got to suck it a few times.

Rare to find a guy who was that classically model-pretty, and also had a seriously huge, thick cock.

by Anonymousreply 25909/06/2015

Sad to think he's probably dead now.

by Anonymousreply 26009/06/2015

And most European cities have bath houses that function more as social clubs where regular guys can take care of each other and no one feels guilty about it.

by Anonymousreply 26109/06/2015

You might be right, R260.

by Anonymousreply 26209/06/2015

Cross Campus Library at Yale in the late 80s. Huge mensroom with a set of wooden double doors so everyone could hear if someone was coming. That's where I got my first ever invite from the guy in the neighboring stall to "stick it in the hole."

by Anonymousreply 26306/27/2016

Meet John Spike

Who's blown most everywhere

From Zanzibar to Berkeley Square!

by Anonymousreply 26406/27/2016


by Anonymousreply 26506/28/2016

I wonder if a lot of the religious schools have an underground "scene"

by Anonymousreply 26606/29/2016

We have been cruising T-rooms since we were 13!

by Anonymousreply 26706/29/2016

r5 I remember the huge undercover bust they had there in the 1980s I believe. Everyone that was arrested ended up with their picture and their name in "The Philadelphia Inquirer."

by Anonymousreply 26806/29/2016

Dafuq is a tea room?

by Anonymousreply 26904/25/2020

a bathroom. where sluts suck duck under the partition where they pretend they are taking dumps hoping another whore will also pretend to be taking a dump in the next stall.. yet they had to sit next to guys really taking a smelly dump just to sit and wait it out in hopes of another whore taking his seat.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 27004/25/2020

The mention of Cross Campus at Yale reminds me that people used to take a short cut through the rotunda of Woolsey Hall to get to buildings up along Prospect Street. One evening, I was crossing through it and thought I'd make a pit stop in the basement bathroom. I opened the outer door and heard a flurry of activity inside and the sound of several doors slamming. When I got to the inner door, every stall was occupied (there were probably 20) and there were half a dozen guys leaning against sinks in there and smoking. This was about 10 pm. I was not sexually active at that age (18 yo) and very naive (Catholic school boy), but I recognized something was afoot and that it probably wasn't an epidemic of cholera.. I couldn't think of any excuse to linger, so I washed my hands and left, but three years later when I was exploring every gay nook and cranny of NYC, I often thought of all the things I must have missed during my college years. Just as well, or I would have failed most of my classes.

by Anonymousreply 27104/25/2020

South Coast Plaza And Orange Coast College

Orange County California

by Anonymousreply 27204/25/2020

[Quote] took me up to the 4th Floor of Grand Central, where there was a stair leading up to an abandoned tennis court, actually 2 courts, with several additional small rooms.

Whoa. What's this r10 tell us more!

by Anonymousreply 27304/27/2020

Someone above mentioned the Men's Room in the PATH Train station way, way, way, down in the bottom of the old World Trade Station. I have seen more action in other tea rooms, but I've never seen more men gathered in one large restroom looking for action. It was so far down underground that most of the people who ever went in there were looking for dick. On the morning of September 11, 2001, I thought immediately of those guys down there. If the cruising was good that morning, they wouldn't leave. I'm sure of it.

The Lincoln Center Library for the Performing Arts had (has?) a small entrance on 10th Avenue. It gets you into the building, but it is not right in the thick of things. Just across from that entrance was a Men's Room. That place was a Fuck Palace, back in the day. You could slip in from 10th Avenue, go directly into that can and there would always be someone waiting for you. Nobody from the Library management supervised the area. It was a free for all. You could always score a blow job from a Met or City Opera chorister, or from an instrumentalist from the Philharmonic or, if you were lucky, an ABT boy.

I'm inclined to think that tea room was one of a kind, but we are a resourceful people, especially when we are horny. There could be others that were equally bountiful in quality and in numbers. But this one was choice.

by Anonymousreply 27404/27/2020

Phipps' Fountain and Tea Room.

by Anonymousreply 27504/27/2020

Bullock's Wilshire's Tea Room had a lovely menu.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 27604/27/2020

Most or certain men's bathrooms at colleges and universities, highway rest stops, truck stops, park bathrooms, gyms/locker rooms, and even bars and restaurants.

The ones I remember: the men's room near the library at Penn State Ogontz and the gym there, Willard building at university park, the library stacks, Rec hall, the men's bathrooms at Chumley's and Mr. C's/Players the dance club.

Tea Rooms are still found in many parts of North America and in European countries; but people just post ads on Craigslist/Double-list saying where they will be, when, etc. or hook up via the mobile phone apps which show you when someone is very close, or they are known public sex venues and people go and hook up fast and leave.

by Anonymousreply 27704/27/2020

Also many train/subway station bathrooms in Philly, NYC, bathrooms in malls and stores, movie theater bathrooms-both porn and regular film cinema or inside the cinema itself obviously, community college bathrooms, the men's rooms of military bases, etc.

R270 my friends who were big into T-Rooms said how the ones they would go to were out of the way and they would go at certain times of the night or day when no random strangers who would use a bathroom what it is designed for would enter. They said how tea room sex was their favorite as they loved to suck, get sucked, or masturbate with men, and how they did not have to pay to go to the baths, go to a bar and buy drinks and spend all night talking to strangers only to possibly be told no, and that they usually always hooked up in T-rooms.

by Anonymousreply 27804/27/2020

I love the smell of my saliva and clean anogenital musk.

by Anonymousreply 27904/28/2020

Sorry wrong thread ∆

by Anonymousreply 28004/28/2020

LOL which thread were you going to reply to R279? Are you the rimming/concerned rim team poster? (-;

by Anonymousreply 28104/28/2020

R281 Obviously I'm not the Highly Concerned Rim Team Mom :) given certain practices I'm afraid I'm rather given to! I have since posted in the proper running thread. Hmm proper rimming, did I say...

by Anonymousreply 28204/29/2020

[quote] Marshall Fields, downtown Chicago. perhaps it was the 7th floor.

In more recent years (as Macys) a small wisp of action would occasionally surface on the 6th floor, but rarely anything worth making a fuss over.

by Anonymousreply 28304/29/2020

Whoever bumped this, bless your heart.

I had several replies above and am enjoying this stroll down memory lane

by Anonymousreply 28404/29/2020

I just can’t imagine getting it on with a stranger, let alone in some grimy bathroom.

The gays were definitely tougher and more hardcore back then.

by Anonymousreply 28505/01/2020

It was that or starve, R285.

I agree with other options it sounds far less appealing, and things have changed dramatically, but there was an art to it and the thrill of the chase.

by Anonymousreply 28605/01/2020

I liked that frisson of danger and the heady lust. Im glad to have partook of the full range of gay sexual experiences of the day.

by Anonymousreply 28705/01/2020

I liked that frisson of danger and the heady lust. Im glad to have partook of the full range of gay sexual experiences of the day.

by Anonymousreply 28805/01/2020

Me too R287/R288.

That's not to say every day of cruising was a porn movie in the making. Sometimes it was boring, sometimes it was sad, sometimes the trolls ruined your mood.

But when the timing was right, and another guy(or guys) were down to get off together, it could be glorious.

by Anonymousreply 28905/01/2020

[R264]: Actually, though I’ve certainly been known to use my mouth liberally, to be honest, I’ve actually only taken two men’s loads and swallowed. (Call me whatever; the very first time a man started to cum in my mouth, I pulled away. I was turned off because it was warm. Odd; I mean what did I expect it to be, chilled?)

But I’m still here and still negative. Mostly because, for all these years, I’ve been primarily a top. Go figure.

I wish you all well in these perilous times. If it ain’t one virus, it’s another.

by Anonymousreply 29005/01/2020

When I was part of the Pitt Men's Study, back in the day, the counselor would talk to us about risks. He probably had every young gay man coming to him, afraid they'd caught something from someone after touching a guy's dick for three seconds.

He told me that while oral sex was not totally risk free, the chances were low that you could get infected. A number of things would have to line up for that to happen: the guy would have to be poz, he'd have to have a high viral load, he'd have to cum a substantial amount of cum, and I, the cocksucker, would have to have a substantial cut or open wound in my mouth for it to infect me.

I swallowed many loads before and after hearing that. I rarely bottomed until much later, and then only with protection. I didn't worry as much because I was relatively exclusively playing with married men (I never really fit into the mainstream gay world) and not that those guys couldn't be poz, too, but my chances were lower.

by Anonymousreply 29105/01/2020

R285 it still goes on today. When I lived in the Southwest my ex was obsessed with reading Craigslist ads and he would post fake ones just to get free amateur porn from women and men, and people would post ads all the time about how they were going to a certain mall or university men's bathroom at a certain time, to porn stores, or to a park, etc. An older gay friend said how basically those were the only places to meet before the internet and my ex who is bisexual said how he went to tea rooms in college in the late 1980s since he was not able to get into bars.

When was that study R291? I was told you can get HIV via giving oral if you swallow/take cum in your mouth, or if you have a cut or broken skin in your mouth. But that it's not nearly as risky as having anal or vaginal sex without condoms.

by Anonymousreply 29205/03/2020

Curious to know if cottaging is an arrestable offense in the UK, and if so, are cottagers arrested and prosecuted? Or do the police look the other way? I remember George Michael going to have sex at Hampstead Heath and not trying to hide it at all. Is that legal?

by Anonymousreply 29305/03/2020

I've occasionally heard of understall action but never figured out how opeople do it. It's just hand jobs or what

by Anonymousreply 29405/05/2020

That and/or oral, r294.

If you have enough access to give it a handjob you can blow it, too.

by Anonymousreply 29505/05/2020

Dumb question but you both have to get down on the floor?

by Anonymousreply 29605/05/2020

Yes R296.

I have heard of people fucking/being fucked through glory holes but an older gay friend who would suck men off in tea-rooms, men's bathrooms and men's locker rooms, and adult bookstores in the 1970s and early 1980s before HIV/AIDS never did this as he said how he was not going to stick his cock into some random guy's ass as not all guys keep their ass clean or clean out before getting fucked. He also liked seeing and being seen and having body contact with a man when having anal sex, and he would check out men before they went into the stall or film booth at the adult bookstore and if they looked unclean, smelled bad, were queenie, etc. he did not have sex with them. Also there was always the risk of being caught or arrested. He said how one time in the 1970s he was in a park bathroom at night with a guy and how they were talking and smoking pot and then a cop walked in and saw them doing this and told them to leave, instead of arresting them. He and his friend were lucky. I know other men who were arrested having sex or trying to have sex by police in men's bathrooms.

I am not sure how old you are but you must remember, this was long before the internet, and most bisexual and gay men unless they lived in the ghettos of NYC, Philadelphia, SF, L.A., or later Palm Springs and Key West were not out and were discreet, as there was always the risk that if you were out as bisexual or gay that you would be bashed, fired from your job, or killed.

by Anonymousreply 29705/08/2020

I was a bit of a clean freak. I never wanted to get on the floor. I'd take soap and a paper towel in to wipe down the toilet that I was sitting on, and the only way I'd suck a guy off is if he came to stand in front of me.

by Anonymousreply 29805/08/2020

R297, the prudes and pearl clutchers here do not get your last paragraph. That’s part of the problem.

There was virtually nowhere to go back then except for parks, bathrooms, etc. There was no Craigslist or Grindr or any other way to meet like-minded guys who wanted to have sex.

by Anonymousreply 29905/08/2020

Thanks R299, the last paragraph should read, 'That if you were discovered or found out to be bisexual or gay...' There were bars but not everyone could go to them, or sometimes they would get nervous about going to them that someone they knew would see them go in. It was even like this up until the early 2000s in some areas. In the 2010s when apps like Grindr were just starting to become very popular in Albuquerque, NM the park, tearoom, and porn store scene was still going strong. No I did not partake, and neither did any of the three other bisexual men I was living with did; but everyone knew the parks and places to go if you wanted to have quick NSA sex. There was a men's room on the UNM campus that everyone knew about and university students would go there to have sex before or after class, on weekends, and guys from the city would go there as well. Yes there are gay/GLBT bars and dance clubs in Albuquerque NM but the men's rooms and parks, porn stores, etc. were used when those places were not open, and in some cases the guys going to them were adults but not over 21 so they could not go to the bars or dance clubs.

Also there's the thrill of exhibitionism/voyeurism. In college I would go to men's rooms to jack off daily since I was horny, and yes one was a tea room-as the graffitti there and it had glory holes obviously but I never saw anyone else hanging around there or having sex there. I know one guy who was in one of my classes did but he was not my type, and a gay friend who likes to watch men have sex would go to parks to do this.

by Anonymousreply 30005/08/2020

Exactly. And of the gay bars I’ve been to in my life, they were more for meeting someone and taking them home. As a youngster (or a closeted married guy let’s say), most of us couldn’t “host,” so even those places weren’t good for a hookup. Great for hanging out, but for a quick blow-n-go, the parks or tea rooms were where to go.

by Anonymousreply 30105/08/2020

I have an idea. If you couldn't host and meet guys in bars, why don't bars have an area you could discreetly retire to for a blow or a quickie?

by Anonymousreply 30205/09/2020

I grew up in a small seaside resort in the West of Scotland. As far as meeting other gay people went, I might as well have lived on Mars. I was very lonely and felt totally alienated. Inevitably I heard rumours and jokes about goings on at certain public toilets, and although I was scared to death, I started going to one. It took a lot of visits before anything happened. The men were either too obvious (one dropped to his knees and tried to suck me off), or as repressed and miserable as I was. Finally there was someone I found attractive who appeared interested in me. He looked about early thirties. Not a word was said, just winks and “let’s get out of here” gestures. I followed him to his car and got in. We drove out to the country and stopped at a forest. He made a man of me, and it was wonderful. He was affectionate and even loving. I never met him again. It was summer, so he was probably a tourist. That toilet was demolished many years ago. I wonder how many other people have such a happy memory of it. I haven’t gone cottaging for decades now.

by Anonymousreply 30305/09/2020

[quote] He made a man of me


by Anonymousreply 30405/09/2020

R302 many did

by Anonymousreply 30505/09/2020

R302 Not too many!

by Anonymousreply 30605/09/2020

[quote]He made a man of me

He must have been a skilled surgeon.

by Anonymousreply 30705/09/2020

Anyone here read the book tearoom trade? It is here on archive dot org and freely available for anyone to read.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 30805/11/2020

A bathroom at the 46th Street station (Astoria Queens) is memorable to me because it was first time I ever had tea room sex (age 15).

Was on my way back from school and had to pee really bad because trains were delayed. I go to the only open urinal which was next to one occupied by a tall, slender boy my age with collar length straight black hair and pale skin. I sensed he was looking at me, so I looked back. He had a big grin. He went to a stall and motioned for me to follow. We didn't do much, but what we did excited the hell out of me.

We exchanged deets and occasionally met up for sex. He was a nice guy, loved to kiss, and had a pretty dick which I liked to wrap my lips around. He'd always stop me when he was close because he liked to ride me.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 30905/11/2020

A bathroom at a beach in Hawaii.

by Anonymousreply 31005/11/2020

I was 16 and visiting relatives in Washington, D.C. -- early 80s. Hot summer day. I got to Union Station early to meet my aunt and needed to pee. A very attractive man went down on me. I never knew such a world (or experience) existed. I think I lasted ten seconds. I still smile and get a little hard every time I visit DC and pass Union Station...

by Anonymousreply 31105/11/2020

Cal state Fullerton. Back in the day The basement of the library Restroom The Theatre lobby restroom The second floor performing arts restroom.

u c Irvine back in the day The downstairs humanities restroom HOPPIN! One of the upper floors of the social science

by Anonymousreply 31205/11/2020

Is it a good book?

by Anonymousreply 31305/11/2020

Columbia U Schermerhorn had two restrooms which were filled with hot hot hot students all horny as fuck. This was back in the 80s. No idea if it's still happening.

by Anonymousreply 31405/11/2020

[quote]Is it a good book?

I'll wait for the movie.

by Anonymousreply 31505/11/2020

I guess I'm the most naive and oblivious person in the world because I've never experienced ANY of this (and I'm ancient.)

by Anonymousreply 31605/11/2020

I’m surprised by that, r316.

Maybe you just didn’t pick up on the signals.

by Anonymousreply 31705/12/2020

R309 How simultaneously gross and sweet.

by Anonymousreply 31805/22/2020

I have eldergay and elderbi friends who told me how sex in tea rooms at glory holes and in adult bookstores before HIV/AIDS was their favorite way to have sex since they could suck cock or get sucked off by multiple men in a day, and people were a lot less uptight than they are today.

by Anonymousreply 31905/24/2020

Geez, people probably got more dick in one day back then than I’ve had in 5 years.

by Anonymousreply 32005/24/2020

Eldergays, are you triggered into a chubby by the scent of bleach?

by Anonymousreply 32107/02/2020

Bleach? Why bleach?

You don’t think those bathrooms were clean, do you?

You’re such a cute kid.

by Anonymousreply 32207/02/2020

The days where you'd hope to look down a long row of urinals and see this

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 32307/02/2020

In the Zurich Airport before the days of security and it being remodelled, there was a set of bathrooms behind the shopping area. Married, straight and gays would wait outside the bathroom doors for someone they wished to have some fun. The bathrooms were done European style, so they had solid doors and walls that went from ceiling to floor. I remember watching a hot 30 yo guy with a wedding ring and good looking wife. He motioned her to go shopping and headed back to the bathroom. He was quickly pushed into a room and the moaning that went on for about 10 minutes was better than an X-rated video. He left the room and returned to the shopping area to grab his wife's hand and walk off into the sunset a happy man.

by Anonymousreply 32407/02/2020

There was a rest-stop south of San Francisco along I-280 that was called Crystal Springs and had a big statue of Father Junipero Serra. Father Serra watched many hot hooks up around the base of his statue and surrounding grassy areas. The bathrooms could also be hot. Later, the local DA made a mission to end everything with lots of undercover agents.

Just south of there was a vista point that overlooked the Crystal Springs reservoir area. Cars would go up and down the road trolling until they found a match. If it was dark, the hookups occurred in the car. If it was daylight, many would walk the trail at the bottom of the hill to find a secluded spot. There was one hot guy that drove a blue two-door Mitsubishi Colt that was worth the wait for his skills.

by Anonymousreply 32507/02/2020

Thanks for listing all these places, I'll make sure to visit

by Anonymousreply 32607/02/2020

We will be waiting for your appearance

by Anonymousreply 32707/02/2020

HOT, r324.

by Anonymousreply 32807/02/2020

R 328. I can still visualize his face today and his beautiful wife's smile when they held hands. I felt like throwing my arms up and saying...time out!

by Anonymousreply 32907/02/2020

Oh look, the old trolls are strolling down memory lane again. That's a tunnel of of dark to light, you just kicked the bucket Dear, no it's not another tea room.

by Anonymousreply 33007/03/2020

Tis better to have been fucked and lost than to never have been fucked at all, R330.

by Anonymousreply 33107/03/2020

R330 how old are you? It was not that long ago that tea-rooms were very common and I remember seeing glory holes in public bathrooms and university locker rooms in the late 1990s, and well into the early 2000s after 9/11 and no I never used one but it was obvious that's what these places were used for.

They are still around but I think people just post ads online and say, 'I will be at a public bathroom, porn store, park, etc. at such and such a time looking to suck dick..."

by Anonymousreply 33207/27/2020

Sorry, but I've never understood the attraction to having sex with someone in a toilet. Just the thought of it grosses me out.

by Anonymousreply 33307/27/2020

R333 my friends who were into having sex in public toilets in the 1970s and early 1980s they said how they did not have the option to go home as they lived with family who knew they were gay or bisexual but did not want them bringing hook ups home, and that the need for sex right then and there overtook going to a hotel, motel, to someone's car, somewhere completely private, etc.

by Anonymousreply 33407/27/2020

[quote]There was one hot guy that drove a blue two-door Mitsubishi Colt that was worth the wait for his skills.

WHET Mitsubishi dude?

by Anonymousreply 33508/04/2020

R335. I don't know but his skill far exceeded that of most men.

by Anonymousreply 33608/14/2020

R333's post contributes so much to this discussion. None of us would be complete without their insightful thoughts.

by Anonymousreply 33708/14/2020

Ridley Creek Park

by Anonymousreply 33808/14/2020

R292 That study is still going on today, and I was active in it late 90s/early 00s.

The risk of HIV/AIDS via oral sex is not zero, but it is very, very small.

As I said upthread:

[quote] While oral sex was not totally risk free, the chances were low that you could get infected. A number of things would have to line up for that to happen: the guy would have to be poz, he'd have to have a high viral load, he'd have to cum a substantial amount of cum, and I, the cocksucker, would have to have a substantial cut or open wound in my mouth for it to infect me.

by Anonymousreply 33908/14/2020

We recall fondly the massive and magnificent student sizemeats we enjoyed in the T room of Royce Hall at UCLA. And NO rubbers ever!!

by Anonymousreply 34008/14/2020

R340 lots of leche?

I can't imagine much cheese, though.

by Anonymousreply 34108/14/2020

R341 meet MPC at R340. She's obsessed with cock cheese and does not realise that there are such things as showering and bathing daily, and that all men with a foreskin do this.

R339 so how small is very small? I know you can get other diseases. My bi and gay friend who are or were-before covid-into hooking up with strangers would go as far as using condoms for oral as they love sex but don't want to get herpes, HPV, or any other disease which you can easily get from sucking or being sucked. When I was into hooking up I never did this but I would rarely hook up unless I met a man who I was really into in a bar back when I used to drink.

by Anonymousreply 34209/05/2020


by Anonymousreply 34310/11/2020

From the other side of the Pond:

Harrod's once legendary all you can eat afternoon tea . . . £3.50, trestle tables loaded with pastries (none of which compared in my view with the old-fashioned straight up scone stuffed with clotted cream and strawberry jam) and endless pots of tea. Pink linen tablecloths - used to go in the colder weather get a seat by the enormous window and look out through the thick green drapes at the weak light over the rooftops of London . . .

Liberty's was also nice and Debenham's, if I remember, also had a harpist on a dais playing dreamily.

by Anonymousreply 34410/11/2020

Clotted cream: the bane of lactose intolerant vampires.

by Anonymousreply 34510/11/2020

So basically any old time department store or city park

by Anonymousreply 34610/11/2020

I wonder how many gay men actually visited these places.

According to DL it was almost all of them.

According to people in real life....not so many.

by Anonymousreply 34710/11/2020

I never have/did but then I live in a small redneck town close to the middle of nowhere, there was a rumor when I was in high school that there was a park a couple of towns over where men cruised but there were also stories of guys getting beaten and mugged there by other guys who knew they couldn't report it because they'd have to say where they were when it happened.

by Anonymousreply 34810/11/2020

Sears Northlake was active in the late 90s, although I think the Sidney Marcus Home Depot was more notorious.

by Anonymousreply 34910/11/2020

R348 was that in Texas? I saw that on investigation discovery. Tearooms/T-rooms or men's toilets and locker rooms with glory holes were well around even until the early 2000s before grindr and other apps. You could find them at any university, in any major city, in small towns, etc. I am sure they are still around in certain places or areas.

No I never used one; but when I was in college I would get horny in between classes or sometimes during class, and jerk off in the public bathrooms and there were glory holes, as well as graffitti; but I never saw anyone else there cruising outside or in the men's rooms, or also jerking off. I am bisexual and there were not that many out students at my college. I do know that a guy who was in one of my classes who I would sometimes smoke weed with him and other mutual friends hooked up in the one men's room and came out as gay.

When I lived in the southwestern USA, before Grindr and other apps, Craigslist and other websites were popular and people would write about how they were going to be at glory hole or certain men's bathroom in a mall, or in a men's bathroom at a college/university at such a time and were looking to suck cock, get sucked, etc. People would also write ads about how they were at public parks at night or basically where they lived at night looking for sex in the dark. No that is not my scene and I was living with a partner at the time and going out at night to parks like that was asking to be mugged, or shot.

by Anonymousreply 35010/11/2020

Around 1988 or 1989, I discovered an awesome restroom at Boston City Hall. It was off the main lobby, surprisingly not relegated to an obscure basement. Nowadays, one has to pass thru security-- and the restroom has a keypad for employees.

Often, the door was locked, and I had to patiently pace around nearby the area, trying to look legitimate until someone exited and the door would somehow be unlocked, or if not unlocked, at least I gained admission to the party by rushing in before the door again closed.

It had four or so urinals, maybe four stalls. Sitting in the stall, one could get a glimpse thru the door's crack of someone jerking across at a urinal.

Bonus: two large, crudely cut gloryholes for one's viewing or sucking pleasure if sitting in the prized booth! The others just had a small peephole. And the place definitely had a certain smell...

Not sure how long this tearoom was active, but somewhat unthinkable at a city hall of all places. Subway station was just across the building for convenient access from most of Boston.

With the entrance somehow locked at times, we could all play to our heart's content until a participant left; then, of course we'd need to make sure whoever entered was there to play.

And not mentioned in any comments so far, but some guys would stand on their toilet seat at some restrooms and look down into the action of the neighboring stall! Creepy, but I'd occasionally do so myself.

I also enjoyed action at 100 Federal Street in the 90s in the basement of the then Bank of Boston tower.. Only 12 minutes' walk to the city hall restroom. No gloryholes, just understall or at urinals.

I even found a gloryhole in 1991 or so at North Station in Boston, off the lobby, where Boston Garden once stood just above. Just two stalls and a couple urinals but didn't seem busy on my visit even though a commuter rail station. Sucked a hot and young blond guy in my only time there. Still remember it Never went back -- why, I don't know, but maybe it was quickly patched over, anyway. To think a major sporting event or concert or circus was occurring just a few levels above was odd.

by Anonymousreply 35110/11/2020

No R350 it's Kentucky home of the most evil closet case in recent history.

by Anonymousreply 35210/11/2020

R245 - Yes, indeed, but as you lot say, "What a way to go!"

by Anonymousreply 35310/12/2020

^*meant for R345, not R245

by Anonymousreply 35410/12/2020
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