Slate on straight women/gay bars

The occasional straight friend of a gay guy (guys) is fine. Straight women by themselves in a group ... no.

I suppose some heterosexual people might prefer going to a gay bar over a straight-oriented one because they're less threatening and women feel more comfortable. In turn, some heterosexual men will also frequent gay bars to meet these women in an enviroment that projects more peace so they don't feel the need to walk around as alpha male to impress women and outshine the other heterosexual men in the room.

Heterosexual men tend to compete for women with some degree of aggressiveness that is not that frequent to see in male homosexual dynamics.

Have you ever been to a young straight club?

The guys are dressed and act like douches. The chicks are dressed and act like skanks. Bar-fights amongst overly-drunken guys AND girls are not uncommon.

It's no wonder they want to come to our bars.

Ban the yupsters, twats and broholes!!

It would be nice if alot of these women didn't treat us like a fairground attraction, like court jesters. I have noticed that most straight women only like to hang out with camp, flamboyant gays who they see as fun and amusing. Masculine gays they seem to have no use for because there is no novelty in them they are like straight guys, and don't massage their egos every few minutes, and fawn over them.

I have aways found the way heterosexual men act around women in clubs as a bit forced, fake but socially expected to be so. Society expects them to act more in a macho way to attract women. Whether or not women find the macho attitude attractive, at least social expectation forces them to act that way in places wehere they are supposed to meet women while there are other men who also want to meet the same women. Aggressivenes and some violence may rise if needed when two guys set thir eyes on the same woman because of jealousy and because they have to prove their manhood.

So why do the women often end up engaging in aggressiveness and violence. I know a few bartenders - fights between drunk bitches over a man is just as common, if not moreso.

I don't buy for one second this idea that straight women only invade gay bars because they feel threatened in normal bars. Straight women on the left have been trained to justify away any shit coming from their sex by playing the victim card, that's what is happening. If women are so averse to tension, they wouldn't be such a constant source of it, as the story illustrates so well.

It becomes obnoxious so easily. If a gay guy wants to take his het woman friend into a bar, no one will care as long as she knows how to behave. But gaggles of women? Fuck, no. If they want bars where they can go and not be harassed by straight men or whatever they are fleeing from, they can open open themselves, like we had to.

But we all know that the real reason most women take interest in gays is because they have this patronising attitude that gays must accept them and pay attention to them, because a gay man is just like a gal pal with a cock.

The thing that pisses me off is when they start taking Instagram pictures in the middle of the crowd with no interest in the discretion of the people around them. Yes, people will think youre edgy and cool because you went to a gay club. But even though its 2015, there are still some places where it isnt safe to be gay or some people who arent ready to come out, and they go to gay bars to feel safe and free, but then they face the potential of being outed to someone they know from the 1,000 IG followers of this dumb drunk skank.

Good point R10.

There's an etiquette these women usually don't understand and don't therefore follow. They treat gay spaces like a form of entertainment , and in those spaces they act like the space is staged for their benefit/ amusement, rather than being a place for gay people to connect in a non-het environment.

It's like with the increasing numbers of het women who come to DL and start acting like it's their coffee klatch and the gay men here should welcome them with open arms.

To paraphrase John Merrick, "I am not an animal."

I have no problem with women in gay bars who know and understand the behavioral norms. But, I am not here to entertain you. Gay men are not zoo animals performing for your amusement.

What straight women who go to gay bars fail to realize is that the titties get you nothing. You don't get to cut in line to go to the bathroom. You don't get to push your way to the front and expect men to let you, like you can in straight bars. Most straight women who go to gay bars don't understand that being women no longer entitles them to certain privileges that they would have in a bar full of men who want to have sex with them.

They want their cake and eat it, too.

Straight clubs can be a bit threatening sometimes because men are competing for the women in there. Heterosexual male culture encourages aggressivenes because it is the way they make display of dominance over the other males and many think that showing they are stronger than the others will attract women. You know, the alpha male who is able to protect his female and stuff like that.

Not that gay males cannot be that territorial and aggressive if they want to protect their boyfriend, but certainly this type of violence among gay guys is less prevalent.

R13 there are a million options for straight women to socialise and enjoy themselves safely. They do not need to swan into gay bars which are established for gay people to take time out from het culture.

women one at a time in a male dominated space is fine, but more than one they start screaming and acting like they are some reality TV star, fuck that shit

Last night I went to a gay bar with 2 good-looking straight men. They're fundamentally great guys, but the spent the whole night laughing at people and getting agitated whenever another man dared to show any interest. It was like they were in a zoo where they were witnessing monkeys fling poo or hump each other. Meanwhile, I've been to gay bars with straight females and all they really want to do is dance and enjoy not being hit on all night!

But surprise, surprise. My straight male friends were swatting guys away like flies even though it was clear they thought the whole evening was a complete joke. Straight women never get a pass because gay men don't want to fuck them.

The solution is simple. Make the gaggle of women very, very uncomfortable. Freeze 'em out.

R16 The only way the story has meaning is if the people hitting on them knew they were straight and knew they were being laughed at. Otherwise they just saw two goodlooking guys they wanted to hit on and they weren't making any commentary on them being straight.

Also your friends were probably just nervous. The most common comment I've seen from straight guys in gay spaces is how shocked they are that gay men are so aggressive. They're grabbed and poked in a way that a straight guy can't get away with with women.

The straight girl, on the other hand, can be more relaxed since they have no expectation that men will be aggressive towards them. Groups of women though should probably avoid the gay bars but I'm surprised it's still a problem considering that straight women are increasingly more hostile to gay men calling them racist and sexist.

Whenever straights come in to gay areas, they expect the gay space to be redesigned to meet their straight needs.

It's true in bars and it's true on datalounge.

Blame Carrie Bradshaw and SATC for this. Her and Charlotte's flaming, queeny gay friends fawning over them.....

In my country there is a very popular drag queen who host his own game show that he uploads on Youtube every week. The show is takes place the most popular gay club in my country. The show requires participants from the audience. Many times particpants are heterosexual both men and women. They are not attention whores or problematic people, they simply like gay clubs because they are more entertaining to them and the more peaceful atmosphere is more valuable to them compared to your typical straight club.

I think that you are wasting your time if you want heterosexual people not to step into a gay club anymore, especially today when acceptance of homosexuality is a growing phenomenon in western society.

But how long is it going to stay peaceful and entertaining when swaths of heterosexuals invade it, R21? At some point it will have turned into just another heterosexual place, and then the heterosexuals will have to look for a new gay place to invade.

In a lot of ways this is analogous to hordes of immigrants invading Europe in search of peace and prosperity but holding on to the religion and behaviours that fucked up their countries in the first place.

Breeders are welcome, as long as they don't just make it all about themselves.

Unfortunately, not making it all about themselves is impossible for most breeders.

A few of them are fine, but NOT as a bachelorette party. No way. It's the SHRIEKING!

R24 like you bitches don’t shriek.

2015, 2020 called. No one is going to any bars. They’re not open in most states. There’s this thing called COVID.