Bisexual Men that Insist they are Gay

You have a very simplistic view of sexuality, OP. Stop trying to define someone through you. You are not the world.

First, we have no idea what "causes" someone to be homosexual, bisexual, or heterosexual. No gene has clearly been identified. Most medical-scientific evidence is that it probably has something to do with prenatal hormonal influences, but there is no endocrinological formula like a a nutrition label, 10% this, 20% that. It's different for everyone. Many people think MOST people have a range of bisexuality in them, but for social identity is a completely different thing.

Most people also go through a period after puberty through their 20s when hormones do wild things to the body. Then later in life. It's different for every person.

When I was younger I got an erection from everything. Working out. Dancing. I could fuck anyone. I've only had relationships with men. 98-98% of the time, I'm only attracted to men. Every so often in life, especially when I was younger and hard all the time, I got hit on by girls, and had sex with a few. Rarely these days, but it has happened, I think a woman is attractive - not because I'm attracted to females generally but because something about her, her pheromones, something unique... and after a flirty situation thoughts go through my head. But I define myself as gay because of my relationships and what's the norm for me. I don't identify as bisexual because it's offensive to my only relationships (now my husband) and suggests to people I could go for any man or any woman. It doesn't work that way.

It's fucking annoying for people like you to try to tell people how do identify or to disqualify me, a man married to a man who has only had relationships with men and almost all sex with men to force me to be bisexual.

OP you attack bisexuals in your post and then ask why bi guys "hide" their bisexuality? Are you the guy who started bitching about bi guys writing in a thread of gay men liking FTM pussy?

I used to have sex with few women up until I was 20. I haven't had sex with women for over 20 years but I do recognize that with a right woman I could. The need is not there, though. I never fantasize about having sex with women, always with men. But I do like watching straight porn more than gay porn probably partly because I like straight guys (if you can call any porn stars straight). I don't get aroused watching lesbian porn or solo female stuff. What does this make me? A disgusting bisexual? A homophobe?

I was bullied in my early teens for being too girly. When I grew up and moved on to the gay circles I found out fairly soon that if I told anyone I've been with girls I might be called a fucking bi cunt. This coming from men I had never even met before opened my eyes to see that some gay men are just like the homophobic bullies I had met earlier.

I don't hide the fact that little part of me likes women sexually. But for 20 years I've only had and wanted to have sex with men. Outside of watching straight porn I live practically completely gay life. When I write here I do sometimes say I'm gay but slightly bi because that is the reality. And as we've seen from earlier threads like this there are loads of gay men here who are not 100% gay. Sexuality is not black and white. It's the same with many het dudes I've met.

Didn't I just read a variation of this? Something like:

The bottom line, if you find men sexually attractive at all or have sex with them, not matter how often, you are gay. Stop saying you are bi, it is so fucking annoying to gay men.

I couldn't disagree with you more r1, your post drips of bisexual conceit and passive aggressive homophobia many gay men have come to expect form bisexual men like yourself.

You think if I weren't born gay I would have done everything in my power to change it when I was going through daily hell in school, I'm gay, always have been since I remember. You are bi and obviously like you said only defining yourself gay because it is easier for the men you have relationships with.

Very few bi men are sexually attracted to men and women equally, most will have a preference for relationships. By your definition and married man who ids as straight but occasionally has sex with men is still straight? You are a bisexual man r1, we are not defined by our relationships but our sexual attractions, sexual actions and desires. A closet gay man who has repressed his sexuality and married and had kids,even though all his attractions are for men, but he repress them, is he then straight, even thought he had no sexual attraction to women but has never had the nerve to have sex with men? No he is still gay.

OP / R4 you clearly have issues and are borderline insane. Saying someone who is married to a man and proudly says he has only had relationships with men is not "homophobic" particularly in any passive agressive way. Do you even know what homophobia is?

As someone who has been an activist for 30+ years when Bowers v. Hardwick was still the law, I can tell you that among activists and others who proudly call ourselves gay, at least a third to half had experiences with women. We came to know what is in our souls, who we fall in love with, who we have our relationships with.

You do NOT own the word gay. "Gay" was around before you were born, and people with a more open-minded definiton of what it means to be gay. You are confusing the concept of "exclusively homosexual" with gay. The two are NOT the same.

Thanks for perpetuating the same discussions on DL, OP.

Mte r3, is this a parody thread or something?

Somebody's trolling for dollars. OP have sex with Chaz and Caitlyn and get back to us.

much ado about nothing. I haven't ever encountered any of those before, OP. maybe you're just a troll. . . . .. .

I am gay and had bisexual sex for 10 years but 5 years into it I figured I really directed my strongest attraction to guys. I liked women and sex with women but I figure it was a phase and I'm gay, not bi.

Bisexual men feel strong pulls to a person, of either gender. I don't know much about bisexuality as it is lived over 50 + years of a sex life.

Drop the "B" in LGBT. The B's are lazy ass worthless pieces of shit riding the coat tails of LG's. That is, when they're not too busy pretending they're straight.

At least the trannies are prepared to fight, unlike the "lets go along to get along" B's.

I'm not talking about guys who had sex with a woman once 20 years ago, but guys who are actively bi but insist they are gay, a prime example is Blues Duncan James:

I call myself gay, even if I still have sex with women.

‘Regardless of whether I sleep with women or not, I’m still sleeping with men so I’m gay.

‘So I’m still attracted to women, I could still easily sleep with a woman. I haven’t in the last couple of years but I think if I meet a girl I could still have a relationship with her.’

He continued: ‘I could still be romantically and sexually attracted involved with a girl.

‘But I still call myself gay. I’m a gay guy. I like men, so that makes me gay.

‘Don’t get me wrong, I think people can be bisexual. When I came out as bisexual at the time, it was just easier to use the word.

‘I do say I’m gay, but I don’t really care about labels. I don’t really care if people want to call me bisexual or gay.’

He identifies as gay because he prefers men, but isn't closed off to the possibility that he might fall for a woman. Technically bi, but so what r12? Isn't that what all you the biphobes usually demand anyways?

He is bisexual, it is ridiculous and misleading of him to say he is gay.

R13, never heard of this person. I've never met anyone like him either.

next useless bitchery, please.

R14 what's it to you? Honestly. move on dear.

I have really never come across this, OP.

aka Ricky Martin

I think it's totally stupid for people to consider themselves one rigid static sexuality and then claim "sexuality is fluid" as the defense for it LMAO talk about hypocrisy. If it's so fluid why are you so hard set that you are "gay". Maybe you are in fact a degree of bisexual (preferring men) why are you afraid/ashamed to admit that possibility??

It's 2015 and gays are still so ignorant.

R10 says [quote] I liked women and sex with women but I figure it was a phase and I'm gay, not bi.[/quote]

By this logic I guess there might be something to this ex-gay mentality after all... Maybe gay guys being gay is just a phase too

I know men who are really bisexual and they have told me and other people that they're bisexual but to certain gay men who are biphobic or who do not understand bisexuality they say that they're "gay".

Bi is the off ramp to Gay St.

ALL.

WTF is OP's problem?

Demanding that people define themselves to suit his oversensitive sensibilities? Can't stand the thought of a gay man having his dick in a woman?

Get aa fucking life.

A lot of gay men have had their cock inside a woman's vag but they're just not sexually attracted to any women/trans men, and they've told me that sex with a woman or Transman just showed them this R23.

A lot of gay men seem to hve some attraction to women. I think that gold star gays ARE REALLY VERY RARE!!

[quote]A lot of gay men seem to hve some attraction to women. I think that gold star gays ARE REALLY VERY RARE!!

Are you discounting we live in a very heteronormative world where people are assumed to be straight and gay guys are pushed into dating women? I remember being in highschool, I had a girlfriend because I really felt like I had to even though secretly I was starting to question if I was differnet.

This is slowly starting to change these days, but historically you didn't have much of a choice but to date women which is why a lot of gay men have slept with girls.

I see young kids (21 to 25 or so) calling themselves "bi" prancing around at the leather bar in a jockstrap, making out with random guys in an alley, trolling scruff. and then saying "i don't get fucked, I'M BI".

I've never said that I understood young people, but this part is particular opaque to my understanding.

R26. I used to think this as well, and, while that is true sometimes, it is by no means always the case. I have seen in gay bars and clubs even very camp gay men 'experimenting' with women snogging, groping etc and they certainly seemed to be enjoying it. I think that whether sexuality is on a continuam or not, many gay men are at least open to straight sex, and some occasionally relish it. These guys in my experience rarely label themselves 'bi' because of their gay preference. So when guys say they are gay to me, I sometimes wonder to what extent.

Many gay men, including me, have a fetish for big firm tits too. I have met many who say they love a big pair, yet the rest of the woman does nothing for them, but there is a level of arousal going on there. Anyone else on here get a slight twinge at the sight of a big firm juicy pair of bazzookas??

THIS is why so many straight women hang around gay clubs etc. They hope there is a slight chance they can bed their hot gay friend when he's drunk or high. IT DOES HAPPEN!

Duncan James is a boozer who doesn't know what he's saying half the time anyway.

R29 Oh Dear!

Aren’t gay men who insist they’re bi far more common?

Bisexuality isn't always 50/50. Whatever gave you that idea? Lots of bi people who are primarily attracted to the same sex just think it's easier to call themselves gay probably because a lot of both gay and straight people are weird assholes about people who identify as bisexual.

Defacto/2015 thread twat @ R33 - Who runs away faster when you expose your flabby,pimply ass and deformed micro genitals, bi guys or gay guys? Just curious, thx

R35 I don’t chase after either. I only go for straight guys.