WHET Bradford Shellhammer?

He decided to lead a more spiritual life away from the press and the public and retired to Idaho. He gave up all of his possessions and now speaks on topics like minimalist living and the perils of unbridled consumerism.

Oh, brother. As if none of this "pre-transformayion to his NEW consumerist self" is predictable at all!

Wow, I know him from way back in the day when he was a skeezy little methhead who'd be fucked by anything to get ahead, mostly for his fix. Then he started that illiterate embarrassment of a blog and somehow smarmed his way into the bed of a millionaire who convinced other extremely gullible millionaires that they should contribute money to his pathetic fag estore. Of course, once everyone found what a moronic fraud he was after they were no longer charmed by his twinkiness which had been replaced by fat, and that he was no more suited to run a supposedly "billion" dollar business (LOLOL) than he was at being a neuroscientist, he was promptly fired and run out of his company by the board, creating much embarrassing drama along the way.

It's unbelievable what totally untalented idiots with mediocre looks can get away with if they're able to snake charm ugly fags with money.

Loathsome. I next expect to hear that he's dead from an overdose. It came close to happening a few times before.

Wow, R3. Sounds like a piece of work!

FAB.com went from a billion valuation to $15 million in months:

Onetime Internet Darling Fab.com Sells for Paltry Sum

After a long, painful fall, the purveyor of $349 Andy Warhol Brillo box sculptures is bought by consumer tech products maker PCH

Who?

15 million valuation is even pushing it, considering all the shit they bought wholesale to sell at absurdly inflated prices on their shit website only visited by ignorant frauen was purchased on credit.

He's not gone away... He's still a success, and his George Michael post was a masterclass in ME-ME-ME writing...

Success in what? Idiocy? No one gives a fuck about him.

Dear Lord in Heaven!

He's the founder of Design Within Reach.

He's still tweeting photos from his fabulous life.

He may be a lowlife but do we have to insult him by calling him a "fag"??

No he isn't, R11. His former flame Dixon was already working there when they met in 2004, according to the OP's linked article.

>gazillionairess

You don't like a man so you have to feminize him? You make me sick.

Bradford Shellhammer 14 hrs · San Francisco, CA, United States ·

Oak. Marble. Black. Sand. Charcoal. Concrete, polished. Stainless. Boucle. Smooth leather. Hide. Cashmere. Enamel. Red wool. Bent wood. Camel. Glass. Surfaces. Wire. Paper. This is my new palette.

Bye plastic, neon, primaries, vinyl, lacquer, knickknacks, lucite, polypropylene.

I'm pinning again!

This insufferable queen is still around. His face is filled and botoxed to within an inch of its life and he's still trying to pass off his bad Andy warhol impersonation as worth consulting dollars to interior design companies.

He tricked a Bulgarian banker into marrying him a couple years ago (and if I remember, spent a pretty penny of money I'm sure he didn't have) on an over the top, ostentatious wedding. And now he's parked on scruff for even more validation, husband notwithstanding.

He's dreadful in every way.

I need to reread the article. I could have sworn he started at DWR R13 after they moved to NY together.

In fact, R16, he insists he is not Botoxed or filled. He even shared the secret to his "youthful appearance" on Facebook. (No, this is not made up.)

Bradford Shellhammer 1 December 2016 ·

The secret to my youthful appearance and lack of wrinkles at age forty has nothing to do with filler or Botox. I have dozens of friends who perform such procedures and still have crevices and crows feet. I think it's two things: 1. I slather my face with face cream in the am, hand cream (yes!) throughout the day, and oils and serums at night and 2. I don't give a fuck. I don't stress. I don't worry.

Try both.

I'm sure I'd despise his company and he sounds just awful, but he's a nice looking guy. I wish I had that chutzpah matched with my own decency and maybe I would be a big entrepreneur!

[quote] He tricked a Bulgarian banker into marrying him a couple years ago (and if I remember, spent a pretty penny of money I'm sure he didn't have) on an over the top, ostentatious wedding. And now he's parked on scruff for even more validation, husband notwithstanding.

Michael Musto commented that Shellhammer was eager to get as much publicity as possible for the wedding (with disappointing results). Musto also thought it odd that most of Shellhammed's own press releases mentioned him but not the groom.

Welp.

That's what someone calls a "nice-looking guy"?

His year-in-review essay on his Facebook page is a treat:

This is the 18th year I have written online and the 18th year I have written a message like the one about to burst from my fingers onto keys as I sit in Bali, Indonesia, watching the sea, while Georgi Balinov heavily breathes, asleep. The day was hot and sunny and now the sky is dark, breaking clouds and showers, ominous. It’s a dramatic contrast to the bliss of the earlier sun. I think of a tsunami that stole life yesterday from a neighboring Indonesian island. While contemplating my life, I think of those lives. I reassure myself, as I have time and time again, when close to and/or thinking of death, that you only got this one chance. So, live Bradford. And so I write. And gulp from my glass of Shiraz.

[quote]You don't like a man so you have to feminize him? You make me sick.

You're new here aren't you, Pet. You'd be better off in a safe space. DL is not your speed.

It seems like it is exhausting to be him.

This is his self-written CV.

Jealous, bitches?

See - that's an exhausting career, to a normal person. More power to these design curators - they aren't really designers - except of the means to market design. I have an uncomfortable relationship with design. Design that is very frontal and superficial. Rather than make me content, it makes me antsy. I like structures and objects and cities and transport, etc, to be well designed - in the sense it is well engineered - but decorative design, hmmmm. Its more miss than hit.

The salaried 'A-Gays' are peas in a pod and utterly exhausting. If you've ever had to mix with them, believe me, they're the biggest Goddam bores on earth. Their gym bodies are the same, their hair is the same, their narrow little brains are the same, and only two things count for them: dick size, and the whether you have enough money to be worthy of keeping up with them. They all put "Work hard, play hard" on their Instagrams & Facebook pages, and tote up their overseas lightning trips to Berghain and Bondi and all the other predictable scene venues. This counts as life 'Wins'. Most are semi or completely psychopathic -- in an utterly focused, driven CEO way, and often in a User way, and sometimes in a completely criminal way. Everything they do is about Keeping Up, because God forbid you fall behind. Every year, everything needs to be bigger: the salary, the apartments, the houses, the cocks. It all goes to plug the enormous yawning voids in their consciousness.

Well, many of us lead lives of quiet desperation but in their instance, its loud desperation. I had a long term relationship with someone on that merry go round and I could never put my finger on whether he had become a functional alcoholic or a functional drug addict (he denied both) but then career messes were made, yet failing up, for the most part. It's fascinating but exhausting to someone not riding the same kind of whirly-gig.

What a douche.

He is the one who dumped his boyfriend because he heard Anderson Cooper was single and wanted to hook up with him, no?

If you get a chance then google his wedding pics. All these stupid masks everyone had to wear. Severely tacky yet desperate to be "hip" and "edgy."

I feel for the husband who is too dumb to know he is nothing more than a walking bankroll for sad rags, "exotic" vacays and cheap, gaudy shit.

Also, the neck tatts are beyond vile.

You're welcome.

EDGY at 40:

With Dear Hubby:

I prefer the hubby by a mile.

Actually he is 42

[quote] So, live Bradford. And so I write. And gulp from my glass of Shiraz.

He needs to go away and suffer, just for writing like that.

His eyes do not look happy.

His face looks butthole adjacent, and not in the good way

R23 — Is that a joke? Did you make that up? Really? Am genuinely astonished by that.

Oh, my people, my people.

Yet people fall all over him on Instagram. Wow.

R38, I don't understand why these people can't even summon a smile in their pictures.

Why don't these people,from Instagram, look genuinely happy. It really is quite bizarre

A smile would crack his face. They work up a blue steel face and stick with it. No one is fooled.

Wow. I mean... just wow.

Looks like a spree killer here.

Lake house looks cool.

He can't afford to smile. He's got an unflattering face. Just standard. Normal. Plain. Nothing exceptional. A smile would add even more little irregularities to his already irregular face.

But if he tips his face down and stares out at an upward angle... it sort of looks like he had high cheekbones, when he doesn't. The pose minimizes his big nose and chubby face. If he doesn't push it to that extreme, and diet, diet, diet... he looks a lot like Sam Nunberg. And he desperately does not want that.

He doesn’t always glower at the camera. Sometimes he sticks his tongue out. Adorable!

How much is the hubby worth?

One would like to think he barely needs the hubby. As an Ebay VP himself he'd be on a shitload. But with such queens, who always need to keep up with their - ha - *perceived* peers (Tom Ford, Tyler Brûlé, Dolce & Gabbana, etc.), the salary very often barely meets the spending.

I am not against tattoos; I have a couple of them. But his tattoos are vile and do not work for him at all.

The only thing about him that’s uglier than his tattoos is his writing style, as shown in R8 and R23.

I find it hard to believe, based on his essays, that he has any friends or a job. Or a husband, based on those hideous tattoos and dead eyes. The ex-boyfriend really dodged a bullet, but he obviously fell for that whole schtick at some point, so you have to question his judgment, too.

Wow, R28 gets it exactly right and yes, he's made the trips to Bondi and Berghain this year and he wants to tell you about them:

"In March I was in Sydney for work and for Mardi Gras... a requisite Cher show, and Bondi Beach in the sun."

"I flew to Berlin, had dinner with my eBay colleagues, on a weekend I sipped an espresso, post-workout, in the middle of a packed Berghain at 1PM on Sunday. Surreal."

Two extremely tedious, shallow people.

Shellhammer looks like a psycho. Dead eyes.

Insufferable. Exactly the type of veneer-and-nothing-more homosexual the NY Times falls all over.

Shellhammer lacks that third eye which prevents him from behaving (and writing) in a manner that begs to be ridiculed. His writing is better than Tommy DiDario's.... but just by a hair. Actually, I imagine Tommy is trying to be Bradford (never Brad!) Shellhammer. Is he Jewish? He looks sort of Jewy.

Two typical young idiots who were just arrogant enough to think they knew everything and had it all figured out, only to find out too late, unfortunately, that they had little to nothing figured out, made far too many assumptions about each other, and about their future together, and now are in a big financial bind because of it. Coupled with them living above their means and very likely little to no emergency contingency.

I have no sympathy for people that stupid.

BS is one of those people who seem inordinately successful at convincing other people he is an intellectual when he is actually completely full of shit.

He’s given Instagram tours of his new Manhattan home which is under construction. It’s HUGE. To be able to afford something that, he has access to a lot of money.

I'd hate to be there when the laughter stops.

He has gayface which is why he tries to photograph himself from certain angles but doesn't always succeed in disguising it.

Also this was Fab dot com back when it was a gay dating site:

R60 he and his former business partner Jason Goldberg are con artists. They ran several startup businesses into the ground, using investor's money. They should both be in prison.

Didn't BS get escorted out of the building as part of a coup by his former business partner, and was so mad he broke the glass on his office door?

R64 Hadn't heard that, I just know he fled to Germany when things started to go downhill.

Gawker covered a lot of the gossip coming out of the office at the time. So much money flowed through them, through multiple "save the company/pivot" strategies.

[quote] The salaried 'A-Gays' are peas in a pod and utterly exhausting. If you've ever had to mix with them, believe me, they're the biggest Goddam bores on earth. Their gym bodies are the same, their hair is the same, their narrow little brains are the same, and only two things count for them: dick size, and the whether you have enough money to be worthy of keeping up with them. They all put "Work hard, play hard" on their Instagrams & Facebook pages, and tote up their overseas lightning trips to Berghain and Bondi and all the other predictable scene venues. This counts as life 'Wins'. Most are semi or completely psychopathic -- in an utterly focused, driven CEO way, and often in a User way, and sometimes in a completely criminal way. Everything they do is about Keeping Up, because God forbid you fall behind. Every year, everything needs to be bigger: the salary, the apartments, the houses, the cocks. It all goes to plug the enormous yawning voids in their consciousness.

Why so jealous, Milo/Linda/AYB? At least they didn't have to suck Mercers' dicks and still end up with a million dollar debt.

R66 wish we could still read the gossip, would love to know more. RIP Gawker.

Yes, R64. There was a write up about it. I know for a fact that he was a hardcore drug user for several years. I was there. He’s a nasty little skank. Of all the NY queens I know, his “rise” has been the most bizarre. I agree with the above poster, he’s absolutely a con artist who should be in jail.

He reminds me of a guy named Bruce LaRoche...insufferable guppie lawyer who married for money. Faux liberal...because it’s fashionable. Hopefully the rising sea levels will wash him and his obnoxious partner Lee away..

So that's where all that $$$ comes from r63.

[quote] You don't like a man so you have to feminize him? You make me sick.

SHRIEEEEEEEEEEK!

SHRIEEE EEEEEEE EEEEEEE EEEEEEE EEEEEEEK!

R68 you can, Gawker is still searchable via Google.

Here, check out Valleywag's archive:

Here's the article that mentions the glass door shattering

Poor Georgi. Just a walking bankroll.

Here's an article on Jason Goldberg running his previous company into the grojndz and yet somehow manages to get investors in his next business:

Do you think Georgi ever had to trade sex with any of his clients at Merill Lynch to close a deal?

And here's a photo of his boytoy (they live in Berlin)

So Goldberg just completely skipped out on the country?

More about Georgi wanting bigger cocks each year, please.

Their third wheel who is always on their vacays is the Slick It Up guy. A particularly vile human being, himself.

Colonial Chic fashions provided by the House of Melania.

This is the Queen Brad I was confusing with Brad Goreski.

The husband is hot - but deluded. This is all smoke and mirrors. “Bradford”s trajectory will be like that of a typical hustler/porn star/whatever, messy and sad.

Why would someone as hot and successful as Georgi hook up with a user like Brad?

OMFG:

Thank you R23 for finding that Facebook post. Best laugh I've had all week. And as for this: "I think of a tsunami that stole life yesterday from a neighboring Indonesian island."

That tsunami totally got the wrong target.

“Pronounces name BRAD-ford SHEL-HA-mer.”

Helpful. From his FB

How were you pronouncing it, r88?

STOO-pid FAGG-uht?