"Straight" people who give off mixed signals: WTF is their problem?

Thank you, Jesus Christ, for starting this thread!

I recently met a woman at work who pinged big-time on my gaydar. I'm in a relationship but I thought, "cool, a kindred spirit at work" as I'm the only lesbian in my building. Then I discovered she was married with kids. That mildly surprised me because my gaydar is pretty accurate. Still, no big deal, just one more seemingly gay person living a straight life. It happens, right? I didn't think twice about it until she started giving me these undeniably long, lingering looks. And hugs. And now, I'm confused. I want to be her friend, or at least get to know her on a friendly level, because we have to work together. But I do not want to find myself in some messy situation.

I don't have a great feeling about this.

A very hot couple (m/f) struck up a conversation with me in the whirlpool at my gym. They were very affectionate (but not in a nauseating way) and seemed really into each other. I excused myself and went into the steamroom in the men's locker area. A few minutes later the door opened and the husband walked in. Went right in for a kiss and we stood there making out for about 5 minutes (uninterrupted). Never touched my cock. Just my ass. When someone else came in we broke and he walked out. Saw him on his way out and he waved and said 'take care.'

I'm puzzled. Is this something I should pursue?

I had a college dorm room with bunk beds. I was on the lower bunk bed. I had come out to my roommate recently and he responded with a homophobic rant that he would kill me if I touched him while he was asleep.

I wake up one night and his bare arm is hanging down inches from my face. I slip out of bed to look and he "sleeping" catercorner on the bed naked face down with the sheet pulled down below his naked ass (he always wears shorts to sleep: never sleeps naked).

But still concerned this was some kind of "test," one that carried a death threat, I didn't do anything.

(My straight housemate at university/ best friend of about two years.)

Whenever we go out to a club and leave each other for a few seconds either to go to the bar or toilet, he always greets me with a kiss on the neck. Not passionate of course, literally a peck, but I still find that strange. And when I first came out to him he was really awkward about it, but since then he is constantly asking me questions about it, just curious questions.

Next time he asks any questions, I'm genuinely going to say I'm up for it if he ever wants to try anything. In a humorous way of course (with very serious undertones).

more!

I worked with a quiet, straight, tattooed hipster dude who, on the first day back at work after New Year's, greeted me with a hug. That hug led to me reciprocating a few days later, but upping the ante a bit with some face caressing as a way of testing the water. I'll say it didn't elicit a negative reaction from him: it led to him caressing me at an after-work party at a bar later that same night, which ended with him whacking me on the ass as we made our way toward the exit.

Which then led to two months of me pursuing him: innuendo, passive aggressive behavior, and ultimately a drunken, ugly confrontation at another bar two months later. He confessed that he just likes it when people are into him. I called him a cunt.

Really embarrassing episode. I still think he's bi/closeted -- he definitely fucks women -- but CHRIST, what a waste of time. I was really in a funk over it for a while.

A neighbor who happens to be a Sicilian. He taught me a lot by...coming to our get togethers, wearing pants that emphasized his package. Very big, but not his penis apparently. He was interested in me, until I reciprocated, then he said things like he'd never ever have anyone s..k him. Didn't end there. Two different gay acquaintances told me he tried to invite himself to their rooms. They rebuffed him. So I distanced myself from him, and remain friendly whenever I see him.

R4, I assuming he's European. They do stuff like that all the kind. Europeans always screw up American gay-dar, it's just starts smoking and the screen melts. However, despite how affectionate they may be, you can't tell if a European male is gay unless you either ask them or catch them in the act.

My assistant at work. I'm married so don't care. For months we would giggle over bunny videos at wimp.com and SGHT tumblr. We'd dance to Michael Jackson in my office, sing at each other walking to the subway, I even nicknamed him "Monkey" like I call one of my dogs. He loved it.

And then he comes to dinner with a girlfriend. She's adorable. My partner and I adore him.

Yeah, I've heard that R8 except I'm also British and I can usually tell. He has a girlfriend too.

1 Super mega Christian type. He was always trying to find reasons to talk to me while he was naked. In the car he would always be grabbing and rubbing my thighs. In his house he would always be walking around with just a towel on and would have an "accident" where he dropped the towel, stuck out his ass, and gave me a backwards glance to see if I was looking. When I spent the night at first I would be sleeping on the couch but then he wanted me to sleep in his bed with him and then he would always insist that it would be better if we slept naked. I'm not stupid. I knew he wanted me to screw him but I never did. He was promiscuous with the ladies. He ended up marrying an ugly woman and had two kids with her.

2. Old boss who looked like Moe Sizlack. He would always drop pens or what not on the floor and stick his ass in my face. He was always staring at me. He would come up to me and give me a shoulder rub, nasty! He was dating a younger woman that was supposedly hot but I never saw her. He eventually married her. I tried to complain to HR but they just laughed it off. The pressure from this sexual harassment, sexual harassment from another woman in a position above me, and other stuff pretty much forced me to quit. To this day I will not spend any money on that company.

3. Old college friend. He was promiscuous with the ladies. He was sleeping with our Professor. Our friendship was cool until we got drunk at a party at his house and he came out in front of everyone and wanted me to screw him in the back room, practically yelling it for everyone to hear. No, I didn't screw him and that was the end of our friendship.

4. My best friend. He was extremely promiscuous with the ladies. He had 3 kids. Supposedly straight as can be and he had a 9 inch cock. He had a huge drug problem though. One day at my apartment while he was high he wanted to watch porn with me, which translates as "I want you to screw me" because straight guys don't watch porn with each other. I could tell by the look in his eyes that's what he wanted. I didn't do anything with him though because he was my best friend and I didn't want to ruin our relationship.

5. Gorgeous, dark-haired beauty at my work. He had a girlfriend with whom he lived. Kept giving me signals that he was digging me. Finally got him alone at the smoker's porch at work and he became aroused while I talked to him. He began to thump his leg on the ground, got flustered, and got a wood. Later in the elevator he told me I had pretty eyes while saying his eyes where "shitty brown". I told him I loved brown eyes and thought they were sexy. Things took a turn for the worse. He started acting super-macho and fronting while giving me mixed-signals. So nothing happened. Too bad that he blew it as I would have done anything with him and for him. I was that crazy over him.

People are so so weird!

I know straight people do the same stuff to one another. I think the motivation that R6 talks about is usually the case, just liking to feel that others are attracted to them but it's shitty behavior to play with people like that.

I was visiting a friend in another city and we went out to a club, I spotted this really hot guy and mentioned him to my friend. My friend says watch him, all night he plays this sadistic come here go away game.

So I'm watching the guy and he's obviously very seductive and then he rejected anyone who spoke to him. I'm not exaggerating it was as if the guy had some evil power that kept people from kicking his ass. He was like a bug under my microscope, I couldn't stop watching the game. At one point he glared at me, the vale of seduction just dropped, I think he knew that I was watching the game. He kind of gave off this seductive assassin energy and then he would look at someone else and an innocent come hither look would cross his face, so disturbing.

I told my friend "I can't stop watching him". My friend admitted that he spent an entire evening watching the assassin and decided he was watching a true sociopath. Also he looked like he could tear a person's head off, not a huge guy just physically powerful. Pure evil, I've wondered if he ever murdered anyone.

Straight guys care about pussy, food, football, pussy. Howcum they can manage to be so complicated without even realizing it?

What's more, when they do give in to their peculiar urges and have extremely naked and/or messy sex with you, they're generally fine with it. Okay, now back to the ladies!

What about those straights that play games only when they're drunk or high?

More!

eugh

They just want to test the waters, and see if they are desirable to members of the same sex.

I feel like yelling, "Just eat my pussy already!"

Unfortunately I think R17 is right about most cases. People want to feel desirable! Damn teases.

makes sense R17

R17 has it, I think.

This has happened to me four times with co-workers--one I'm still friends with, all that I was absolutely uninterested in.

I'm a bi woman. The only women I've ever hooked up with we're straight. Idk why that is!

The majority of my friends are straight males, and they do love to flirt. But that's where it ends.

In my (bi female) experience, the straight chick who sends mixed signals because she loves the idea that someone is into her is a fairly common phenomenon. I've also run into a few of the sort who just can't stand to be excluded from any club. They know deep down they are straight, but they hate the idea of being limited to just one option, and the most boring, least groovy option at that. They want to think of themselves as the kind of people who "don't do labels," but when you actually start to get down with one of them, it never goes very well.

Straight guy on Reddit who had an r4r about being curious, and wanting a one-time-only JO or maybe oral with a guy.

Only real, non-BS example

I met Tom Daley at a book signing once.

I swear to God, if there's ONE of these motherfuckers in a room of 700 people, he'll hunt me down. I've even been stalked by them.

They'll do all sorts of shit: hold hands, hug, talk very intimately, sleep in the same bed knowing I'm gay, look deeply into my eyes, make sexual remarks. But if I ACT on it, there's hell to pay for me. "I'm not like that," or "Don't touch my dick," are some of the things they say.

Sometimes, I have gay men do the same thing, but it's usually straight ones. I don't understand their game, and I avoid them at all costs. But even now, it happens.

Run girls, save yourselves!

Bisexual males with girlfriends, or "girlfriends", are giving you mixed signals, OP. Not straight or "straight" males.

Not always R28, obviously.

No...always. R29.

They would be bisexual. BISEXUAL.

I know that grosses you out. Sorry to ruin your party.

I'm bisexual myself so no, it doesn't gross me out R30, but it's the notion of being found attractive. Everyone likes being desired, even if it's not reciprocated.

If you're interested in someone you'll probe to read into things as flirting. Plus, people mirror flirt; they flirt in response despite not being really interested.

I find it interesting how many guys give me mixed signals (I'm female). I've had multiple conversations where men feel the need to tell me they're STRAIGHT then tell me they would make certain exceptions. Sometimes these are guys who are flirting with me, sometimes not.

I actually don't get as many mixed signals from women.

What's worse is when they suspect you might be queer and they purposely flirt with you JUST to find out if it's true. And once they find out it's like, "okay, just checking." Especially friends. It's not even that you're interested in that person but they show interest in you, so you're like, "okay, they're definitely coming on to me". I'm not one that is interested in someone who I know is straight, no matter how attractive they are. But don't make a person think you're both on the same wave length, on purpose.

I'm a woman, in the last post, btw. But I was on another forum and straight guys were talking about how they want to suck a man (or have and want "more cock") and how they wanted to be banged by a man. But they're in NO way attracted to men and not the least bit bisexual.

Are you guys perhaps running into a few of these?

[quote]The only women I've ever hooked up with we're straight.

Oh, dear.

Any gay guys where interested in the mixed signals of some fat chick, or any chick at all? Probably not.

Wow R34, that sounds very forward for guys who identify themselves as straight.

[quote]The only women I've ever hooked up with we're straight.

The only women I have ever hooked-up with were lesbians are FTMs. They were total tops and laid back brahs.

[quote]No...always. [R29]. They would be bisexual. BISEXUAL.

If the same-sex flirting and mixed signals lead to an actual sexual encounter, sure, the person is bisexual/closeted. But if the interaction never gets past the flirting stage, and the person's just a big ol' tease, it's totally possible s/he is straight and simply gets off on the attention and feeling of being desired.

And frankly, either way, the person is likely a big mess, and you'd do well to assume s/he is not available to you and leave it at that.

At least 50% of these sound like closet cases, not "straights".

gl guy in LA here. guys will do this to see if they could score with me, to see if i am interested. they are definitely 'presenting', but they are str, ostensibly. and also douchebags, primarily. their behavior alone cancels them out, so good luck on that. gay men who notice you but aren't aggressive or staring hard-eyed or bitch-faced about it get respect. women are more flirtatious nowadays because they really don't know who is gay or str anymore. works for me

I think I told this story here before. I had a coworker that looked like Reggie Bush. He had an amazing ass and he showed me a pic of himself in a shower with his naked ass sticking out from behind the shower curtain, and the nude silhouette of his body. He was married with two kids at the time, this was about a year or two ago. We were great friends, but I was a little thrown off about him showing me that pic. It was supposed to be a joke, but I think he wanted more of a reaction out of me. Now that we dont work to together anymore, and his marriage is not going well, Im thinking about asking him what his deal is.

[quote]gl guy in LA here.

Translation: Fug.

ha - i get hit on enough, R43. its just weird how people do it sometimes, and i have noticed str cockteases. sorry

[quote]ha - i get hit on enough...

Translation: Fug.

This is no mystery, as these straight people are looking to score bragging rights to impress their straight friends with.

We, the lovelorn gays, are the target of much gossip and innuendo. We don't hear them talking, but we are the topic of conversation amongst our straight peer.

The "he's gay and wants me" or "she's a lesbian and is always checking me out" meme is constant.

It won't go away, accept it.

Had.a straight friend I was not out to at all. We had to share a bed for skiing trip with big group of friends, m/f. During the night he'd get real close and he tried to put my hand on his crotch. Not sure if he was testing me, or him. I rolled back over still as though I was asleep. Nothing ever said about it.

Gays are exciting to straights, especially the ones in the doldrums. Straight people go to bed at night thinking, "Is that there is" and drag themselves out of bed in the morning only to be disappointed once again.

Gays and lesbians are an entertainment to them, and we are of almost mystical stature and shine with exceptionalism.

Homophobia is a direct result of straights who are in despair and regard us as magical and mysterious. They think that we all live fabulous lives without boredom. Thus the insane and oftentimes murderous jealousy.

Analyze the next homophobic person you meet and see how boring their lives are. Observe how boring they look, how boring they dress--it's all self-evident.

Straights flirting for fun is just an attempt for them to dip their toes into our pool of mystery.

[quote]Gays and lesbians are an entertainment to them, and we are of almost mystical stature and shine with exceptionalism.

If you are a quiet gay...forget it. You're hated.

R48 has a great point. These people seemed stifled, self-conscious and a little afraid of the intended result

i moved to a very liberal, mellow norcal college town from the bay area. there are a lot of guys where i can't tell if they're just small-town stoner friendly or bi. it's like my gaydar isn't tuned to this frequency.

it's a relief when i visit sf because my gaydar works just fine there.

The ones that are really straight do it for ATTENTION and VALIDATION. It's like a cute girl getting "likes" on facebook for her photos from desperate virgin men - she wouldn't fuck them in a million years but they provide validation for her ego.

I'm only 20 but seriously, my gaydar is non-existent.

This old friend of mine, known him for years, even knew his wife. He got divorced and has a new girlfriend. He's cute, very liberal but never thought he was interested in guys. I still dont know.

Once, years ago, I met him at a gay club, he told me he was just buying cigarettes as he lived down the street (it was true). Months ago I met him in that club again, only he did not live down the street any more. He was alone and we ended up talking all night, but nothing more. When it closed, he insisted on giving me a ride home and left me at my door. Only the day after did the penny drop and I thought maybe he wanted me to ask him up.

R25, what is R4R? Does reddit have personal ads?

I will not send you a story, but i think that my point of view is original. I think a lot and i feel a lot so here is what i think about 'straight' people who give off mixed signals.

First of all, most of these people are certainly not that straight. When you are really straight, temptations of this kind do not appeal to you at all, they leave you cold and totally disinterested. You don't want to try at all. The problem is that most bisexual people find it hard to copy with their homosexuality, so most of them end up with a person of the opposite sex. It's safe and you don't fall on your face this way. After all, from an age and on, people don't lean on passion and on their genuine feelings but rather on compassion and politics.

Reddit does have personal ads, even for just BJs. Gotta keep tabs on that geek in your life...

I forgot to add that there are more gay people than you suspect that they are out there. They just choose a straight life.

You understand if you are gay if you feel more passionate in bed with a man or a woman. I mean yes, bisexual people get their kicks with both sexes, but even in their case i suspect that they feel more intense with men or women. They can feel pleasure with both sexes, but the intensity is not the same.

You're right, R56.

R56, that is just the kind of thinking that leads to you deluding yourself that most people are really gay. I've known your type and you will sadly learn you're wrong as you grow older and wiser. Like R17 said. Straight people sometimes even do this to each other by pursuing a rivals paramour. These insecure, usually drunk people just want validation that most everyone finds them irresistible. There are those that do this only when drunk.

R60, there are some people that fall into this category, i won't deny it. However, i think that you speak from personal experience, i'm a little more objective. I hope you didn't take it wrong. I respect your opinion, anyway.

This thread just enhances my fear and loathing of people in general.

How anyone could play mind games with innocent gays and lesbians only to have it laughed at by their little circle of friends makes me sick.

R62, ok, yes, there is a minority of sick people who do that. However, most people don't act this way, i assure you. Bisexuality is a need, it's not just a game.

had an instructor who was married for several years. the second I met her I knew she was a big ol' dyke. this woman tried everything she could to get me to make a pass (tickling me and trying to cop a feel, standing so close i thought she was going to kiss me, kneeling in front of me and pulling at her sweater so I get a flash of cleavage). i had no intention of getting involved in that so no dice. but she did seem to want live vicariously through younger gays that she befriended. with some of the older closeted gays, i just don't think they have the will to come out, so they play this mixed signal game to test the water but still have the security of a straight life.

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[quote]i just don't think they have the will to come out, so they play this mixed signal game to test the water but still have the security of a straight life.

I think that's true in many instances.

My ex ADMITTED to doing this to me. I befriended her at uni, and wasn't really interested at all until she started relentlessy flirting.

Although we ended up in a serious 8 year relationship she always identified as straight, claiming she unexpectedly fell for me, but had no general attraction to women whatsoever.

When I called her on the flirting she admitted she was just trying to see if she could get me to like her.

Yes, she had major issues and it ended very badly.

"WTF is their problem"?

They have no problem...they are playing a game. Realize that at the outset & then outplay them.

That is the best revenge. I've done it many times.

Children don't like it when their toys blow up in their faces.

Learn to turn the tables.

R11 Straight guys DO watch porn together. I'm a early 20's woman, bisexual (but that's irrelevant) and for most of my life my closest friends have always been guys. I think the younger generations have a more relaxed view about that kind of thing. I personally don't get it, but they find it so amusing. And have conversations about it as if they were shopping for a new laptop. Idgi either.

On occasion there was porn, and a few times they just put that shit on with me there too. No thanks!

This guy at work, who ended up becoming a friend: He keeps looking at me at work but when I turn to him he will turn away. I have caught him many times looking at my crotch and even putting his elbow on my penis. He has tried to rub himself on me as well. There was a time when me and him were so close people actually thought we were doing something. But he says he is straight and even has a girlfriend that he is madly in love with. He has allowed a few things to happen like me rubbing his butt one time and other things and he didn't tell any of our friends which is what makes me suspicious as if a guy was doing that to me I would probably hit him lol. I am bicurious, not sure about being gay yet so it would bother me if a guy was doing that to me, but he just told me to stop one time. Although we have had some other encounters that were very intimate. It sucks because I feel like he just plays or played with my head and as colateral damage my emotions as well.

I've noticed this with women, both those who are in some way queer (in reality) and those who are not. The latter at the worst. If they suspect you're gay/bi, they'll purposely flirt til they find out and as soon as they do, they stop. The closet queer ones will continue if you proclaim to be straight. It's "safe" that way.

There's this guy I started having classes with at the beginning of the year (I'm in 10th grade). Never have I met someone as cute as him. He had such big brown eyes that made you melt. I thought he was cute at first p. But the more I talked to him the more attached I became. He's like no other guy I have ever met. He told me and my friend he was bi but now he says he's straight and he's always literally letting me grope his crotch and he like tries to shove his finger in my ass as a "joke" and he gets so close that it makes me want to cry because I don't want to make a move and ruin the friendship we have. I confessed that I like him in a long ass letter and now I feel like he just flirts with me to get kicks out of it. Wtf to do :/ any suggestions? Message me at cruzartpop@icloud.com because I'm out of damn ideas.

This issue is pretty complex and people have hit on various theories I think are accurate. I truly believe that 10% of the population is 100% gay and 10% of the population is 100% straight. The other 80% falls somewhere in between. So you have a huge swath of men who identify as 100% straight who would actually do something sexual with another guy given the right opportunity. But because society is SO black and white on this issue, these guys are afraid to do anything for fear of being labeled 100% gay. If there were no labels involved, lots more guys would be comfortable fucking around with each other and women, with no problem.

On the other hand, in a way I think these straight men can be jealous of gay men and their freedom to be fully realized human beings with a full range of human emotions and the ability to express them. Gay men can allow themselves to be the object of desire. Straight men can't really do that with women, they must always be in pursuit. SO I think straight men enjoy being the object of a gay man's desire. It's a different role for them. Who doesn't want to be wanted? He doesn't want to be chased? It gives them the ability to reject someone instead of always being on the receiving end of a woman's rejection.

[quote]One day at my apartment while he was high he wanted to watch porn with me, which translates as "I want you to screw me" because straight guys don't watch porn with each other.

Oh, honey, honey, honey.

They do.

So I met the guy in a leadership club back in college and he was awfully nice. We had tasks to complete as groups and one of them was cross-dressing, and he's complemented me saying I could easily pass for a girl. Then there was the random invites to club activities, a solitary walk in the dark shairing stories about ourselves. What ticked me off is one evening while taking a bus home from a fun-day, he got really up-close and personal and begun asking me who I liked with(my boyfirend ofcourse) and if that means I'm gay. And I said yes.he was really cool with it and even said he had his suspicions. Later that night he started texting me quite the steamy details...long story short we ended up sexting the whole night. He was quite persistent that I delete the texts there after. He is quite into body contact and massages so I promised me one so sometime the following week I went over to his place and he actually let me give him the massage....but from then on he has been very cold and distant always blaming it on his demaning job. He occasionally calls to check up on me but I try as much as possible to brush him off because I don't want to get sucked into that whirlwind again.

.

This has been going on with me for like 2 years. I befriended a "straight" girl and, within a month, she was flirting with me and telling me it was her plan to sleep with me. I told her I didn't mess with straight girls, but then we got closer and closer emotionally and essentially became best friends. We texted all the time and saw each other every weekend. It was very much like we were dating.

At the 3 month mark she spent the night over my house and propositioned we sleep in the same bed. Nothing happened, but I woke up in the middle of the night to her spooning me pretty hardcore. In the morning she got up to pee then came back to bed and cuddled me more.

This cuddling in bed continued for several months, growing in intensity each time (hands on thighs, thighs between thighs, her breath on my face etc.) but we never had sex.

Besides that she was always looking right in my eyes, in a romantic way, sitting right up on me, standing next to me so that our bodies touched, and just generally touching me all the time.

She then got a BF and put an end to it. But...some months later she decided she wanted to have a threesome with me and another guy who wasn't her BF! The threesome wound up being me having sex with her and her having sex with the guy. Afterwards she just went back to her BF like nothing had ever happened! Oh, and we went back to cuddling in bed.

She broke up with her BF another few months later then flipped out on me over the cuddling/sex etc. Total gay panic! We stayed friends but it was weird for a while.

Then she started messing around with the threesome guy but, as soon as he developed feelings for her, she split.

Nothing happened between us after that for a long time. Then, about two months ago, she started getting really touchy and affectionate with me again. We went out together one night, got drunk, and had another threesome! Meanwhile she is screwing some other guy.

So I got upset and confused, confronted her about her behavior, and she denied all responsibility. She simply said "It just happens when it happens." Then said she cannot give me what I want.

Now we are not really speaking and I still have yet to get any answers. I miss her friendship and I'm always sad, despite it being screwed up, and I wonder if I should have just kept my mouth shut...

God help me, I've been under the spell of a guy like this for almost a year. It's like a drug. Gives me just enough to keep me hooked.

Hmmm

It IS a drug, r78, one I've been mainlining for five years. I guess unresolved sexual tension is it's own reward.

A close friend of mine is straight (I'm gay) but is very affectionate with me when drunk. Lots of prolonged hugging; if you saw him in that state you'd assume he was gay. He even asked me if I wanted him to fuck me (on his birthday, no less). It did not happen because he was too drunk and his family separated us. But when sober he's completely different. Yesterday I had a conversation with him and at one point he said, "I'm neither gay or straight." A minute later I asked him, for clarification, "You only like women, you're not interested in men at all?" And his answer was, "No, not at all," in a matter-of-fact way.

R78, those little bits he gives you to keep you hooked are called "breadcrumbs," and you can't live on breadcrumbs. You need the whole loaf or you'll starve. Don't let him play games with you; if he doesn't want to make it happen for real, just move on to someone who will.

[quote] "Straight" people who give off mixed signals: WTF is their problem?

Oh OP, I don't have that kind of time right now but believe me, been there done that.

Straight friend in high school, good looking. The old massage ploy I massage him, he pulls down his jeans. I rub his white ass even open it for a look at the hole. Turn over I said, I'll do the front. OH NO it's not that what are you doing? Told our friends I tried to seduce him then later came over "I've decided to accept your offer" no way, didn't happen...

Usually an ego thing.

There's a very femme guy I work with and the straight boys love to chat him up (as a group) because he flirts with them and they can say things that they couldn't say to a woman. They'll even ask him fashion advice if they have a date or something. Would love to get them all out someplace where alcohol is served and see if anything happens. I think the guys are flattered because he's very flirty/complimentary of them, sort of in a 1960s secretary way (he's a Brit, so that adds to the exoticism I suspect.)

My hot straight bro flirted with me for a while after meeting to test and see if I was into dudes. I was upset to realize this because I flirted back and felt fooolish to learn it was all an experiment. Now, we are very close friends.

Some people are just naturally flirtatious. Some people just really crave attention from both sexes even if they're only interested in one gender.

And some people (gay or straight) give off a very sexual vibe that causes everyone around them to act completely different than they normally would.

I flirt with pretty women all the time. I just can't help myself. I have my 20 year hs reunion this summer. I know some of the girls will flirt and get super touchy because they like the attention. I'll love it and at the end of the night go home to my wife. She loves the stories and we giggle at the way the married straight ladies beg for attention. I don't cheat but the attention makes me feel good as I'm getting older and gross.

I love mutually flirting with straight identified dudes. I love it cause there is this hot mix of bro to bro interaction mixed with some lowkey sexual tension. No fruity effeminancy or anything undermining their masculinity. There is this hot black personal trainer at the gym who comes up behind me and puts his hand on my waist and says, “you looking yoked, bruh.” I sat back to him, “just trying to be like you when I grow up, man.” He always blushes like a seventh grader.

Flirting is fun in itself. I’m not trying to hook Up via flirting. It’s mere sport

Straight guys think, I am hot (but, not datable), everyone else thinks I am a lesbian. I have big dick energy

A trainer told me he'd tried gay sex -- but he didn't like it. And I thought why are you telling me?

He was constantly making gay remarks; divorced (twice!) he said more than once: I'm not getting married again until gay marriage is legal so I can marry a guy.

Seriously. This was before gay marriage was legal.

Then, he marries a woman and I hear him tell someone a few months before: "Yeah. So...so I'm getting married. Again. And that's what I m going to do and it's the right thing. And...and it's all going to work out."

I thought omg WHO are you trying to convince. He pushes people away, changes jobs, changes residences, regularly.

He's running from something and maybe someday he'll figure it out.

He's giving you Love Kernels. This song truly explains it all.

One guy I used to work with would always follow me around and I would also frequently catch him staring at me. He would also sometimes follow me into the bathroom (which I found a bit creepy). He would frequently talk to me and was nice enough and he was good looking. One day he asked me if I wanted to meet up with him that weekend at a bar. I said sure. But when the weekend came and I texted him saying I was ready, he backed out and said he couldn’t make it. It was like he got nervous and he never asked me again if I wanted to meet up with him, but he would still talk to me at work.

I swore he was gay, but later on found out he had a girlfriend that he lived with (and they really did live together because I would see pictures on his social media of them together). The whole thing was very bizarre.

Years ago in my 20’s I was working out at a gym and met a gorgeous Peruvian named Chino that looked like a young Keanu Reeves. He followed me around like a puppy, there was a little bit of a language barrier but treated me like a king, he’d clear our plates like I was his wife and were were inseparable. He’d hint that he dumped his girlfriend with a sly wink, and was so cute I would’ve done anything for him but never acted upon my feelings.

One day we got on a completely empty bus together and instead of sitting right next to me, he sat across the other opposite seat- and suddenly I realized what I wanted wasn’t meant to be and he’d been stringing me along for some reason. I chilled the relationship only to discover another gay guy working him over months later at the gym, he had replaced me. Sigh.