Take the poll: Which is the greatest Sumerian actress?
Best Sumerian Actress?
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 173||06/24/2015|
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 1||04/09/2013|
I can't believe you left out Erishti-Aya. At least you could have included an "Other" choice.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 2||04/09/2013|
What was the name of that actress in "Sumerman II"? The one who went nuts and was found hiding behind the temple granary in the altogether?
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 3||04/09/2013|
When they talk about "pre-Code" Sumerian films, they mean before Hammurabi.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 4||04/09/2013|
R4 wins this entire year.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 5||04/09/2013|
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 6||04/10/2013|
Please. Ninbanda all the way. Let's not forget that Ninbanda was the brightest star to hit Ur since Nanna, racking up countless awards and nominations, including 4 Gilgys in less than two decades, to become the most honored actress in the Fertile Crescent. And when the roles dried up, she headed north and conquered the stages of Kish. Sadly, it was here in Kish where Ninbanda suddenly took ill and died from ergot poisoning, but many suspected her ambitious understudy, Elaine Stritch, of spiking her barley ale.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 7||04/10/2013|
Wasn't shagshag in softcore porn before her mainstream work?
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 8||08/16/2014|
Do any Sumerian actors have yellow skin and/or womanly butts?
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 9||08/17/2014|
Stritch was brilliant in Enkadu Williams' "Sumer and Smoke"!
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 10||08/17/2014|
It wasn't the actresses who got small. It was the dramatic engravings!
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 11||08/17/2014|
Without Meredith Baxter-Birney as a choice your poll is worthless.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 12||08/17/2014|
Enanatuma was brilliant as the mother in "Suddenly Last Sumer," but the parts about cannibalism were a little [bold]too[/bold] realistic.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 13||08/17/2014|
Mamie, quick run down to Staples and get Mommy a keyboard with the Summerian letter equilivant for "M"
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 14||08/17/2014|
Bump for funny, under-appreciated threads.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 15||08/19/2014|
We call them Ur-Threads, R15.
You know: brilliant, dusty, and completely illegible to recent generations not educated in the classics.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 16||08/19/2014|
Shagshag's range is unmatched. She can play water-bearing slave AND grain-carrying slave.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 17||08/19/2014|
Ninbanda is always the same in everything she does. She was a wonderful Shamhat in Gilgamesh the Musical in Ur in 2325 but she gave the exact same performance as Inanna in Lugulbanda and the Mountain Cave a few seasons later in Larsa in 2318.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 18||08/19/2014|
[qoute]Wasn't shagshag in softcore porn before her mainstream work?
Are you thinking of Wet Hot Sumerian Summer?
Yes, she showed her boobs but that wasn't porn. It was a comedy.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 19||08/19/2014|
Puabi and Shub-ad were great as Lüu-Si and Eth-Ul in [italic]I Love Lüu-Si,[/italic] especially the "hostess tunic" episode ...
Eth-Ul: She said I was as large as all of Mesopotamia!
Lüu-Si: All I did was intimate that she was a little messy. But she does have the biggest 'potamia I've ever seen!
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 20||08/19/2014|
Does Ashusikildigir really belong on this list? Sure, she was great in a harmful of films like "Holiday in Shuruppak," but her real fame came from TV and her sitcom, "I Married Ashusikildigir."
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 21||08/19/2014|
I think MattDamania is generally underrated, and it's unfortunate her career has slumped of late. I think she still has some sweet honey left on her. Now it seems she is only known for one thing, and I'm not referring to her classic action series Ur-Bournanna. Why does MattDamania not get more respect, and why do people think she's resting comfortably on her considerable laurels of past success and the Damania ziggurat?
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 22||08/19/2014|
Puabi should have won best actress for her work in The Good Sumeritan.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 23||08/19/2014|
The lack of appreciation for Enamatuma wounds.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 24||08/19/2014|
Fuck off, R24.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 25||08/19/2014|
Surprised to see Stritch on the list but not Bacall or Rainer. But these sorts of things always skew towards the young actresses.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 26||08/19/2014|
I just don't get the public's fawning over Enanatuma. Don't get me wrong, I think she's a talented actress, but c'mon -- [italic]click, click, click...[/italic]
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 27||08/19/2014|
R27 = Kath-ur-ine Hep-ur-n
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 28||08/19/2014|
This thread alone is worth my 18 shekels.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 29||08/19/2014|
[quote]Puabi should have won best actress for her work in The Good Sumeritan.
MattDamania was in The Good Sheperd. How do you think her work compares to that of Puabi in The Good Sumeritan?
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 30||08/19/2014|
Nan-Amous-Kouri once called me. It was a wrong number.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 31||08/19/2014|
Shub-ad started dating Ashusikildigir's husband before they got divorced.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 32||08/19/2014|
[quote]Ninbanda is always the same in everything she does.
But that is what her fans love. Her last film about the pistachio plantation, Samir's Nuts, got a 93 on BabaGanoush. Same old crowd pleasing Ninbanda.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 33||08/19/2014|
[quote]Same old crowd pleasing Ninbanda.
I understand her film about travelling with Gilgamesh (portrayed by Ur-g Cluny) through the heavens was both a critical and audience favorite. Alas, I did not see it in its original release, and only saw an interpretation by an epic poet.
Spoiler: Gilgamesh makes a big sacrifice!
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 34||08/19/2014|
Shagshag can do it all. She was wonderful in the drama "The Jemdat Nasr Story," and she was hilarious in the sitcom "Ur You Being Served?"
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 35||08/19/2014|
I saw Ur-go, the recent Best Picture winner starring and produced by MattDamania's best friend for eternity, Batfleck, and adored it! It portrays our most uncouth neighbors to the east so accurately. They are savages, aren't they? To those who say otherwise, I say, "Ur, go fuck yourselves!"
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 36||08/19/2014|
The MattDamania routine was really only good for one post.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 37||08/19/2014|
How many Mesopotamian Oscars have these women won?
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 38||08/19/2014|
I believe it's called an OSK-UR.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 39||08/20/2014|
I like this thread.
It will not end in t-ur-s
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 40||08/20/2014|
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 41||08/20/2014|
It's me, baby. No one else!
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 42||08/20/2014|
Who was the lead actress in the classic "Darmok and Jalad at Tanagra"?
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 43||08/20/2014|
In the original, referenced on Star Trek, I believe Sritchie played Jalad. And she ate the scenery.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 44||08/20/2014|
I did like Eliza Beth Tayl-Ur in "Butterfield Cheth"
But she didn't deserve the Oz-Kar.
It should have gone to Sh-Ur-Lee M'Klaan in "The Courtyard Dwelling of Abandonment."
I had to relieve myself in the sacred river after reading "Suddenly, Last Sumer."
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 45||08/20/2014|
I never liked how Ninbanda's nipples point to different markings on the sundial. Symmetry is important.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 46||08/20/2014|
[quote]I had to relieve myself in the sacred river after reading "Suddenly, Last Sumer."
Is your name Nephurlu?
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 47||08/20/2014|
Enanatuma in Cruel Sumerian!
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 48||08/20/2014|
I long to return to my youth to see "Valley of the Figurines" again. I loved all the characters, Anna at the Wells, Neely O'Harlot, and especially Jennif-Ur the Simple.
It was a tragedy the all the prints were lost in the Great F-Ur-Guson Riots.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 49||08/20/2014|
I did think Cecil Beetle-Ton's comments about Eliza Beth Tayl-Ur were mean. She did lose her husband in that Icarus exploit.
And his saying Shagshag had a face the jackals of midnight wouldn't touch with a starving fang seemed a bit over the top.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 50||08/20/2014|
All of these "actresses" eat Yak pussy. Shamhat Kadesh was the best in "Meet me in Gilgamesh".
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 51||08/20/2014|
"In" Gilgamesh? R51? What a slut she is!
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 52||08/20/2014|
Ah! But she was excellent in all those zany "road" pictures:
"The Road to Kish" "The Road to Ebla" "Over Der"
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 53||08/20/2014|
Oh, dear, R45. It's Os-kur not Oz-kar. To, R39, you listen!
You seem as if you're from a city-state Gilgamesh would fly over, and your reed stylus technique marks you as fat.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 54||08/20/2014|
I'm so tired of hearing that damn "Theme From a Sumer Place" at every harvest festival.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 55||08/20/2014|
En-hedu-anna in 'Refried Green Chickpeas'
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 56||08/20/2014|
r54, they are probably Balawat twats. All Gilgamesh would fly over is maroon.
And don't start with the Nineveh bashing, no matter how many Minas a month I pay for my cot.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 57||08/20/2014|
Hey, Weevil-Infested-Cunt at R54, also known as this thread's Temple Hall Monitor, if you don't have the education to know that "Oz-Kar" is the original utterance Bet-He Davis offered at seeing the first granite statuette (long before the bronze versions), translated as "Like a Cock on a Bull! Mine!" I don't know what we can do about you except ask you shut your barley-cake hole. Great Ki, I'll match my cuneiform style to yours any day.
As for being fly-over, my family has been in Eridu since the Kish. So go suck a viper head.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 58||08/20/2014|
R58 can die in an auroch-fat fire!
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 59||08/20/2014|
It is sad you didn't make W&W R4, it was a clever comment.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 60||08/20/2014|
Oh, Anu! All of Mesopotamia knows that Puabi is a sure wager to win the BSA award this year since she co-starred alongside Rob-en Willi-Ibbi-Suen (may he rest in Irkalla) in that heart-tugging dramedy that will be released posthumously. The entire city-state was talking about it at the Shurrupak Film Festival.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 61||08/20/2014|
R59 is a leper.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 62||08/20/2014|
Regarding the whore Erishti-Aya's...like throwing a mud brick through the temple gates.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 63||08/20/2014|
I eat dung.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 64||08/20/2014|
My [italic]gá-la[/italic] stinks!
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 65||08/20/2014|
Eh, I kind of lost my respect for Shagshag when I discovered that she and her husband Uruk were still living in a collective farm-subsidized mud-brick hut in Eridu.
With all the money she made in the pan Akkadian tour of "Mesopotamia/Yousopotamia", she can't afford market rent for a two-bedroom+grazing pen unit?
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 66||08/20/2014|
I know Mah-dah-Nuh has just started her career in performing arts, but I cannot see a future for her, as she is unconvincing in her public square performances. Her singing voice resembles the men of Eridu during bloodlettings.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 67||08/20/2014|
[quote]Her singing voice resembles the men of Eridu during bloodlettings.
That's what the young kids want to hear!
They have no ear for music.
How I long for the Pre-Pottery Neolithic Age...
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 68||08/20/2014|
R65 is so right. R64's sappy and fetid emanations are used as asp repellent.
But, back to the topic. I agree about Mah-dah-Nuh, but anyone complaining about her must be an Elder Temple Eunuch. Because NOW all the youngsters of Ur are listening to Uh-Delphia, a bovine howler who sounds like her camel curtains are being chafed by nutshells.
Before that they listened to Begone-Say, a Nubian of no particular talent except as a receptacle of man seed.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 69||08/20/2014|
[quote]Ninbanda...the most honored actress in the Fertile Crescent
That goatwife only got to the top by sharing her own fertile crescent with every producer in town.
Sorry, but I will never understand her appeal if I live to be 30.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 70||08/20/2014|
I'm glad none of you have mentioned Gl-unn-ee here. Her attempts to draw attention to herself in the market is not "acting." Some just cannot perform as others do, those of us suitable for the public square.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 71||08/20/2014|
This poll is incomplete without the great Inanna Dumuzi, queen of Sumerian neorealism. She was sublime in "Nights of Shuruppak," the baffling "Last Year at Bad-tibira," and the camp classic "All About Ninlil." And who can forget her impassioned Golden Nibiru-winning portrayal of a peasant barley worker forced into a life of crime on the eve of the Akitu Festival in "Bitter Barley"? This long-neglected star is in serious need of rediscovery.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 73||08/20/2014|
Ugh, Tee Hem Zii is reporting that Leensd i Lohannurabi was involved in a hit and run chariot accident. She was allegedly behind the reins and fled the scene. She's home now, apparently under Caliph Ur Na law she has 360 subunits before she has to turn herself in. I wonder if she visited the brewer's cart before the accident...
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 74||08/20/2014|
Don't call me Ugh, R74. It wounds.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 75||08/20/2014|
Girls, girls! You're both Ziggurats!
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 78||08/20/2014|
U left out Gil Gam Eash
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 80||08/20/2014|
R81 just can't stop. And contributes nothing, because she can't.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 82||08/20/2014|
Two bickering cow dungs contribute only more fuel to a fire and ruin perfectly good threads.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 83||08/20/2014|
Why did you have to ruin a terrific thread with that fucking picture, R79?
You're the asshole around here. Now grow up and go get your homework done.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 84||08/20/2014|
ATTENTION: R72/R77/R81 is a TROLL. It's posting homophobic comments on several threads, including the one about the 8-year-old kid beaten to death by his mother and her boyfriend (to paraphrase, the asshole posted that he would've let the child live, just so he/she could beat him again to teach him a lesson).
Please F&F this sick fuck and get it banned!
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 85||08/20/2014|
May the fleas of a thousand camels and a thousand piles of dung infest your hut!
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 86||08/20/2014|
[all posts by tedious troll removed.]
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 87||08/20/2014|
Word on the street is that Shagshag is a cinch to posthumously receive the [italic]Not Since Nineveh Prize[/italic] for her stunned performance, playing with herself in the long awaited biopic about her mentor/lover. [italic]Long Day's Journey Into Elaine's Stench[/italic] is expected to premier at the Babylon on the Euphrates Cinema Complex within the century.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 88||08/20/2014|
And, please, she played herself, she did not "play with herself," R88.
That part of her career had been long over and she had not done the Dance of the Seven Curtains and Two Oxen Horns in the trader's tents for many years.
But, really, she's DEAD? Communications are so slow in this age. It seems like only two years ago we heard she was doing fine.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 89||08/21/2014|
How come we never talk about the men? Huh? What about Mandingo?
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 90||08/21/2014|
Mandingo comes 4,000 years later and 6,700 miles away.
Perhaps you are confusing matters with Balulu, "Auger-Delver," who famously killed everything with which he copulated except an old she-camel of fifteen gestations.
He called her his Succulent Delight and had her made Second Concubine, second only to his half-sister, "The Bitter Virgin Kubababa.
None of which has anything to do with Sumerian actresses. I repeat: Shagshag is DEAD?
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 91||08/21/2014|
Yes, it was last year near the summer solstice. It was also near the time that the Nineveh army, sent by Sennacherib, invaded a small watering hole of unmentionables.The dances of the curtains was done by by women for women AND THEY WERE NOT SLAVES! Middle and upper caste, dare I call them men, were known to go up into EACH OTHER. This den of iniquity, revolting, REVOLTED on invasion. It was down by the old stone wall by the Shamash Gate. The defeat of the army by unmentionables will go down in history. The funeral of Shagshag had unmentionables throwing themselves on her pyre.
Such was the end of the great Shagshag. Such a great voice, such a glorious and sad life.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 92||08/21/2014|
Shub-ad is on this list?!
Hacktress, yes. Actress, never.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 93||08/21/2014|
r92 - That. Never. Happened.
It's an Ur-bahn legend that began with a Cuneifweet that said, and I quote,
"Shagshag shags hag's carpets on shag carpets."
From there it took a life of it's own.
Similar to Richard G-ur and the G-ur-bull story. Pure fiction.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 94||08/21/2014|
The G-ur and the G-ur-bull story has never been authenticated. I know people who live by the Shamash Gate and they went to Shagshag's pyre.
The only legend was Shagshag herself.
Other watering holes for degenerates have been energized by the Shamash Gate riot.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 95||08/21/2014|
Where is Rog Ur Eeb Ur when I need him? I can't remember half these actresses!
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 96||08/21/2014|
It's quite funny that Sumer represents the height of that region's civilization. Eventually, America will similarly degenerate.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 97||08/21/2014|
[ r97, if you doing an aside to the inline character thread, put it in brackets, which is what vile r79 should have done...]
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 98||08/21/2014|
Shub-ad has done good work, but she ruined any chance of getting an Osk-ur by doing paycheck crap like "Dude, Where's My Oxcart" and "The Nine-Year-Old Virgin."
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 99||08/21/2014|
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 100||08/21/2014|
[quote] The dances of the curtains was done by by women for women AND THEY WERE NOT SLAVES!
Ah yes, the festival by women for women. There is much dancing and celebration. The older women are pushed by younger ones in mobility oxcarts, and much bappir bread and barley is consumed.
On the final day, there is a contest to see how many blocks of salt each woman can place under her breasts.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 101||08/21/2014|
I too would like to hear more of the men.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 102||08/21/2014|
R102, I believe Stritchie was friend of Nol Cow-ur-d and he was one of degenerates at Shamash Gate. It is reported that men went up in him never to see daylight again!
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 103||08/21/2014|
Perhaps the over-caffeinated twat at R98 could sit on a ziggurat and stop playing Thread Arranger. Bracket yourself, you insolent ass.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 104||08/21/2014|
Did no one else see G'er-ul-deen Pay-ge in Sumer & Smoke? By the gods, it was the most worthy performance, in Mesopotamia or I am not a proto-Euphratean.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 105||08/21/2014|
Thank you, you camel anus, for posting correctly r104. And that is not a ziggurat up my Tigris, I'm just happy to see you.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 106||08/21/2014|
No matter the actress, they always turn in stellar performances opposite this guy.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 107||08/22/2014|
Is he responsible for the banned golden showers movie, The Waters of Babylon?
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 108||08/22/2014|
Let's just say that he proved that the gardens aren't the only thing that was hung.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 109||08/22/2014|
I lost respect for Enanatuma when she changed her name from E-na-na-tum-a. She went all upscale, big city forgetting her roots.
I did like her, even though she was wasted, in Urkle goes Ur.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 110||08/22/2014|
[quote]I lost respect for Enanatuma when she changed her name from E-na-na-tum-a. She went all upscale, big city forgetting her roots.
Well, she did release that song "Enny From the Hut" when she was dabbling in a singing career.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 111||08/22/2014|
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 112||08/22/2014|
Oh, so young.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 113||08/22/2014|
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 114||08/22/2014|
What was the big scandal about the lamentation priests at the temple of Enki?
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 115||08/23/2014|
Do you refer to Water Jar Gate? We promised never to speak of it again!
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 116||08/23/2014|
They speak of Ak-hur, a man nearly as tall as a ziggurat, with a large pendulous organ as big as the phallus of a beast.
He is very well regarded among the men at the temple. They admire him.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 117||08/23/2014|
R114 - he was majorly bearding when that rendering was made.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 118||08/23/2014|
Digging up dirt on Puabi, rumored to be strap on top.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 119||08/23/2014|
Ninbanda is a pants chaser.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 120||08/23/2014|
The Shamash Gate Ziggurat is an insatiable bottom!
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 121||08/24/2014|
S-ur-ly this poll would better be taken by a target group of Sumerian Housewives as they gather round the Well fo Fra-ur?
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 122||08/24/2014|
Gilgamesh and Inkidu ARE NOT GAY! Gilgamesh is married with many children, and Inkidu is just his friend! Can't you fags realize that people arn't gay just because you want them to be in your sick Bronze Age fantasies?
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 123||08/24/2014|
r121, I find that if hung like ziggurat, ankles rise to Dilmun!
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 124||08/24/2014|
Is Shagshag dead or not? If she did descend to confront Utu, who inherited her palaces? You know she had more than that simple mud hut down by the river. And then there is all that lapis lazuli...
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 125||08/24/2014|
I understand MattDamania was upset she was overlooked in the acting Osk-urs. Why do you think she was overlooked?
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 126||08/24/2014|
Leprous whores of Druaga's dread underworld harem, know you nothing of the great Shagshag's repertoire? Marduk spare us these uncivilized, unworthy fibers to twine His war net. Cease using your stylus to relieve your piles and leave the clay to potters at least.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 127||08/24/2014|
r125, it was rumored that her estate included a graduated series of three male members carved of lapis lazuli. It is also rumored that the great Ninbanda now has them for her own dance of the curtains. It seems that Ninbanda held some very interesting blackmail that she chose not to reveal while Shagshag lived but the holder of the estate was more than happy to seal the deal post mortem. I was also told that the holder of the estate was surprised that Ninbanda knew exactly of the treasures in the first place. Each of the three has a famous name!!!
Or so I've been told.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 128||08/25/2014|
R128 = Bar-bur-a Wa-Wa
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 129||08/25/2014|
I glimpsed the future and saw that the goddess Lenz Dun-Ham-Urabi will be celebrated far into the future!
That incense really works!
I also glimpsed that something called NSFW can be applied, possibly, to the goddess' fine form.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 130||08/25/2014|
[R130] Did the wind blow out the lamps in here? Suddenly I can no longer see!!! It is only darkness. Oh holy Shamash, find me!
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 131||08/30/2014|
There seem to be alot of Medes infesting this thread! Go back to your fetid Caspian swamps and leave our date palms alone!
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 132||08/30/2014|
r132, r127 sang it like a soothsayer in the temples of Marduk.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 133||08/31/2014|
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 134||08/31/2014|
What's this about Jo-ahun Euphrates Rivers being at the gates of the netherworld?
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 135||08/31/2014|
Yes R135. She was being bled to release some unclean spirits and suddenly Astarte halted her heart, the priests had to put her into an induced com ur. Her daughter Meliss Ur is at the Ziggurat with Jo-Ahun.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 136||08/31/2014|
Edg-ur should have sacrificed himself TWICE to escape this silicone she-devil.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 137||08/31/2014|
The horns of the goddess frolicked across the sky last night.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 138||08/31/2014|
Enkadu is so gay you can hear the swish by the River Indus.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 139||09/01/2014|
R132 You mistake your own dung for a savory date.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 140||09/01/2014|
If Jo-ahun does descend below, will her womb fruit continue the selling of poorly made ornaments down by the river? None of those items looked genuine. Lapis lazuli? Anzu knows the truth!
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 141||09/01/2014|
The fruit of her womb Meliss- Ur is going to inherit scores of shekels, Astarte be praised she will no longer have to sell her questionable lapis and gold.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 142||09/01/2014|
By the lapis of Shagshag, womb fruit Melliz-ur sells the polished dung of water buffaloes as Jo-ahun sold her own bowel movements. It has been foretold that this will end in tears of Marduk!
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 143||09/01/2014|
Hamonryebi! I just saw that many of Puabi's "special, private" clay tablets were hacked through her unshuttered window opening and they are making their way through the streets of Eridu. Apparently she had her scribe apply his stylus freely for personal communications with her beau Babum.
One wonders why she didn't delete these copies - unless her loins quiver at the cuneiform of her own pudenda. I wouldn't doubt it.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 144||09/02/2014|
Puabi is just another of the Real Whores of Eridu. Just like the whore Erishti-Aya's...like throwing a mud brick through temple gates.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 145||09/02/2014|
Jo-ahun has taken tight hold of the stone base of the ziggurat, and will not leave these earthly rocks to pass to her next life.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 146||09/03/2014|
Jo-ahun may indeed be ready to enter the arms of darkness, but her spawn, Meh Lizard, clings to her rotting sinews. She fears the living oblivion that will come to her with the passing. All the shekels of Kish will not buy her anything but the indifference due such a dog woman.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 147||09/03/2014|
r144 - MY EYES!!
I just saw Puabi's private mud tablets - A man named F'u Chan has them on display in the atrium marketplace. Apparently, when the tablet clay was still soft, Puabi sat directly on it until an exact copy of her under region had been created.
How many times can it be said:
if you don't want people to see your skirt, don't sit on a wet clay tablet!!!
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 148||09/03/2014|
Jo-Ahun has been moved to a private tent. Some say this means she may awaken with the dawn, some say the Afterworld beckons her.
Only Erishkigal knows for sure at this point...
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 149||09/03/2014|
It is whispered that Melliz-ur will sell the ashes of Jo-Ahun in the market place on the shore of the QuVe Sea. One also mumbled that vessels shall be made of this new stuff called "glass". People would not spend a sheckel for a bowl of her ashes in the traditional goat dung pot, but in this "glass", who knows. People have gone to this market place to buy the droppings of Mre Oz-Mun and now the ashes of Jo-Ahun. Marduk, save us.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 150||09/04/2014|
R148. Thank you with petal water for your explanation. I miscontstrued the hair prints as some kind of foul nematode unleashed and wriggling across the mud.
No temple wax was stolen to remove the fur from HER camel back - or toe.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 151||09/04/2014|
I just read a cuneiform of news from Aybee Sea, it appears Jo-Ahun has crossed to the netherworld. Nergal be damned!!! Poor Coop-Ur is now without a grandmother and benefactress.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 152||09/04/2014|
Yesterday was the solemn observance of the date when the ziggurats fell.
Damn those ill-behaved spirits selling lapis lazuli to "honor" the fallen. May the gnats of a thousand dung heaps swarm around them.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 153||09/12/2014|
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 154||09/14/2014|
Why did you bump me, R154?
I spit in your eye!
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 155||09/17/2014|
When Puabi famously evoked an ex-temple concubine of Anu-noknok suffering from a curse of writhing worms in a "Lioness on a Hot Clay Overhang," it turned out she actually was suffering from writhing worms.
Does this undermine her accolades or underscore her verisimilitude? I mean, why should a leper get an award for playing a character where her toe falls off?
And I hear she's part Nubian, anyway. Worm Country.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 156||09/17/2014|
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 157||09/17/2014|
r156, like you know from writhing worms.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 158||09/18/2014|
[quote]As for being fly-over, my family has been in Eridu since the Kish. So go suck a viper head.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 159||11/09/2014|
The Teri Gar-ur
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 160||11/09/2014|
As noted in the other tablet, Matt Damania is reprising her role as Bo-ur-ne. I am glad that we will no longer be exposed to ladyboy loving Jeremy Renn-ur.
The scribe also noted that Matt Damania is playing the role of Gilgamesh in an unusual case of a female playing a male lead. It is a quite a twist of the reed and a maj-ur risk the produc-urs are taking. However, Matt Damania is a versatile, risk-taking, subtle actress. She will be outstanding.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 161||11/09/2014|
The reviews are mixed regarding the star epic with Muk Bong-o and AnnE Hath-u-way. Does Matt Damania bring any thing to the telling of this drama?
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 162||11/10/2014|
So no Osc-Ur for AnnE?
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 163||11/10/2014|
I tell ya, we get no respect.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 164||11/10/2014|
r164, you think You get no respect...
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 165||11/11/2014|
r156, Puabi left some impressive shit.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 166||11/14/2014|
There is no way AnnE will be rewarded at the temple with best actress. That old hag hasn't tasted the fruits of the heavens since the time of Meskalamdug. And have you seen her latest cylinder seal?
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 167||11/16/2014|
NuDL reminds me of cluster fuck by the temple whores of Marduk.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 168||06/03/2015|
If you have any legitimate criticism of the temple whores of Marduk, please send a tablet messahe tu M-ur-iel.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 169||06/03/2015|
Friend, I do not poke the snakes in the market of Shuruppak, and I do not poke M-ur-iel.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 170||06/03/2015|
The snakes of Shuruppak are nicer.
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 171||06/04/2015|
In the name of Queen Inanna, who knew the bitchfest was 7000 years old?
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 172||06/05/2015|
Ahhhh, Queen Inanna!
|by Kirk-Ur||reply 173||06/24/2015|