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Why do you prefer to be a bottom?

Instead of being a top.

Why do you like being a bottom?

Discuss here.

by Anonymousreply 11011/24/2014

I don't! The anus is not a sex organ and it is dangerous and unhealthy to use it as a sex organ. I can't do anything about the fact that I am homosexual, but I don't have to submit to outrageous abuse of my body.

by Anonymousreply 101/14/2013

R1 = Ladybird Bachmann, overcome by guilt after getting plowed at a highway rest stop.

by Anonymousreply 201/14/2013

R1, do tell, the mouth is not a sex organ either, but I'm guessing you submit it to 'outrageous abuse' regularly, right?

by Anonymousreply 301/14/2013

Yes, R3, but it doesn't hurt like hell to get fucked in the mouth. And you can't get hemmorhoids, fisures or tears there either.

by Anonymousreply 401/14/2013

I love submitting to the stronger guy and feeling like I'm being forced.

by Anonymousreply 501/14/2013

[quote] And you can't get hemmorhoids, fisures or tears there either.

I've never gotten any of those, I wonder why

by Anonymousreply 601/14/2013

I don't. I prefer cock on cock and sounding. Replicating heterosexual fucking is a major turn off.

by Anonymousreply 701/14/2013

Frotting is pretty hot. It's also totally safe, and feels great.

by Anonymousreply 801/14/2013

I´m too hot to frot!

by Anonymousreply 901/14/2013

I got herpes from frottage.

by Anonymousreply 1001/14/2013

You can get herpes from frottage? I know a lesbian who lives for clit-on-clit action.

by Anonymousreply 1101/14/2013

Why? Because it feels good to have something shoved up my butt, esp. if it is attached to a hunky man.

by Anonymousreply 1201/14/2013

Got to tell you r4, a lot of guys don't think it hurts like hell in the ass either.

by Anonymousreply 1301/14/2013

after a couple times it actually feels really good

by Anonymousreply 1401/14/2013

I'm 42 and have never tried. I don't really intend to either. Not that there's anything wrong with others doing it. I've just never wanted to participate. I wouldn't want to put the guys I've dated (only 4) in that "position" psychologically, and by extension I don't really want to be put in that position either. I just feel that there are other ways. Whatever floats your boat tho.

by Anonymousreply 1501/14/2013

[quote]and sounding


by Anonymousreply 1601/14/2013

What "position" psychologically?!

by Anonymousreply 1701/14/2013

It feels really good. Only the first time hurt. After that, it was all pleasure. It has to be done right, and by that I mean lube and being careful getting it in, but once it's in, it just feels amazing. I always get off while getting fucked.

As to why I prefer it, I don't know. It's something I always fantasized about. I tried topping but it did not feel natural to me. Total bottom here and I always match up best with total tops.

by Anonymousreply 1801/14/2013

It's called a prostate orgasm and it's amazing.

I rarely bottom, but once I had a handsfree orgasm. Shocked the hell out of me.

by Anonymousreply 1901/14/2013

Because it feels GREAT.

If God hadn't meant for men to fuck other men, he would have put our prostates on our earlobes.

by Anonymousreply 2001/14/2013

If the anus was meant to be a sex organ, why doesn't it self-lubricate?

by Anonymousreply 2101/14/2013

thick uncut cocks make it sing

by Anonymousreply 2201/14/2013

If I sleep on the top bunk, sometimes I fall out.

by Anonymousreply 2301/14/2013

R21 - plenty of women need to use lubricant during sex. And plenty of straight people have anal sex also.

by Anonymousreply 2401/14/2013

R15 here. Listen, I'm cool with whatever other people want to do. I'm just whacked out by those psycho-sexual roles, such as top and bottom, that's all. For me--and note that I'm saying for me, not for others--I don't want to be put into a feminine role, and I don't want to put someone I'm having sex with in that role either. I was married for 8 years. If I want to fuck someone, I'll go find a woman. I just feel as if there are others, equally fulfilling ways to have sex.

by Anonymousreply 2501/14/2013

Gay men clean out their colons before sex or they call it being "dirty." Is this why gay people tend to have spontaneous sex a lot?

by Anonymousreply 2601/14/2013

"If God hadn't meant for men to fuck other men, he would have put our prostates on our earlobes."

I'm a gay guy who's never had anal sex and have no desire to. Just because it's pleasureable doesn't mean it's healthy for you. You increase your risk for contracting HIV and other STDs and for developing rectal cancer. Smoking is pleasureable to many, but that doesn't make it a healthy activity. I love pizza and I'd be in ectasy if I could eat it everyday. But I know that would not be condusive to good health. Think about it.

by Anonymousreply 2701/14/2013

[quote]whacked out by those psycho-sexual roles

You sound boring, possibly nice, but boring

by Anonymousreply 2801/14/2013

R27 - you sound like a blast! You couldn't have anal sex anyway - that big stick would get in the way.

Seriously - loosen up. Take the stick out once and awhile.

by Anonymousreply 2901/14/2013

I love to bottom because daddy tells me I need to

by Anonymousreply 3001/14/2013

It just feels so good

by Anonymousreply 3101/14/2013

My self-lubricating manhole is dripping with desire!

by Anonymousreply 3201/14/2013

holes do lubricate, but only after a lot of stimulation.

I came the other day from using a toy, i can't recommend it enough.

by Anonymousreply 3301/14/2013

Anal sex always results in rectal prolapse.

by Anonymousreply 3401/14/2013

Hey R28, R15 here again. Yeah, I probably am boring to a lot of people. I consider myself a more of an academic than anything, which is an accurate assessment since I'm what's commonly referred to as a mud-fud. I have an MD Ph.D. in microbiology and I'm a research physician, which is about as exciting as, well, watching cancer cells grow. And yes, bully for you, my friend, you're right again: My entire life people have been saying to me, "You're the nicest person I know." I generally reply with my standard nice guy line, "Thanks, but I'd hate to meet the rest of your friends," so as not to get too embarrassed. Yet in spite of all my boringness, I am two, no, three things you might actually find somewhat interesting. First, I'm rich as shit and that's no lie. In addition to research I also happen to practice pediatric oncology which is quite lucrative. Secondly, I'm pretty hot, R28, and that's no lie either. Now, to be truthful, I'm not Hugh Jackman or Henry Cavill hot, but on the Hot Scale, I'd say I'm knocking on Bradley Coooper's door. Now, he may not be answering, but I'm close to being as decent looking as he is. In fact, I think my smile is a lot better than his, actually. So you know, if I wanted to thrust someone into the more feminine of those ol' psycho-sexual roles, I sure bet I could find a willing participant. Especially since my third attribute is . . . nah, I'm too much of a nice guy to talk about such things. You have a good day, R28.

by Anonymousreply 3501/14/2013

I've always wanted to write one like that after getting regally pissed off on DL. Never could manage it. Dang that was good.

by Anonymousreply 3601/14/2013

Newsflash: r1.

There are women and heterosexual men who like to receive anal penetration.

The sex act does not define sexual orientation, only the gender of whom you prefer to do it with does.

by Anonymousreply 3701/14/2013

[quote]For me--and note that I'm saying for me, not for others--I don't want to be put into a feminine role, and I don't want to put someone I'm having sex with in that role either.

Huh. I love fucking a masculine guy. And when in that situation I don't find him to be "female" at all. Fortunately I'm now married to a sexy bearded hunk who fits my needs just right.

by Anonymousreply 3801/14/2013

I really got a kick out of reading r35. He is why I come to DL, him and the other remarkable posters. Rock on, r35.

I top, but exchanging body fluids is too intimate an act to do with just anyone. I can be totally satisfied with mutual j/o. I know this can sound antithetical to the first point, but I do enjoy kissing as well.

When I've bottomed I enjoyed the pleasure of someone else working hard to get me off, feeling their desire towards me is a huge plus. I do not, however, find bottoming to be inherently emasculating and think that this is an optional (and for some maybe desired) component of the act.

by Anonymousreply 3901/14/2013

[quote]For me--and note that I'm saying for me, not for others--I don't want to be put into a feminine role, and I don't want to put someone I'm having sex with in that role either.

Oh for fuck's sake. This tired tripe, really?

Getting fucked doesn't make you a girl or 'feminine' anymore than throwing on a strap on makes a dyke 'the man'.

Grow up already.

by Anonymousreply 4001/14/2013

R35 is a rich, fine MD,PHD.

And so funny.

by Anonymousreply 4101/14/2013

I'm going to have to say that the mind boggling intensity of the euphoria from it is probably the main reason for being a bottom. There are a few negatives related to it, but experiencing the greatest physical pleasure that is possible in life generally tends to make up for those things.

by Anonymousreply 4201/14/2013

"why do you prefer to be a bottom?" Is the question. Not many seriously answered that question. Seems to me there are about 10 bottoms for every true top. Most bottoms in my experience are all about themselves, now much dick you are going to give them, how hard, how fast, how many dicks, fuck me all night long and on and on.

by Anonymousreply 4301/14/2013

Im fat, lazy and got shit on my mind.

by Anonymousreply 4401/14/2013

I'm a top so have no investment in refuting the idea that bottoming is feminizing (well other than valiantly defending my partner's honor). But I really don't get it. What is the womanly part? Taking a cock? Being vulnerable to a man?

by Anonymousreply 4501/15/2013

[quote] There are a few negatives related to it

Getting an STI? Even with protection.

by Anonymousreply 4601/15/2013

I can go either way, top or bottom, but it truly depends on the other guy. I've had partners where we have flip-flopped and equally enjoyed it. When I was younger I was with mostly older men all of whom wanted to top me. It was hot being taught how to properly prep for a hot night in the sheets and then going at it for hours. As I age I tend to top more bc there are so many bottoms. Anal sex is an art and there's more than just banging. The prostate orgasm is strong and intense. Blow jobs are tiring. Plus there's always teeth. Well with a few exceptions. I've never felt more masculine taking cock up my ass. It's just amazing. However going to back rooms and bathhouses to just plow a guy with his ass in the air is not appealing to me. There definitely has I be a connection.

by Anonymousreply 4701/15/2013

R35, rich-as-shit? good-looking? actually, you no longer sound nice, you sound dreadful.

by Anonymousreply 4801/15/2013

R48 and R35, is shit rich? It looks kind of lonely as it circles the bowl. Hardly rich.

by Anonymousreply 4901/15/2013

the question was 'Why do you prefer to be a bottom?' so why in the world are all these strict-tops-i-don't-even-want-my-mate-to-bottom answering? shut up already and let the pros handle this.

by Anonymousreply 5001/15/2013

anal sex doesn't allow for procreation.

by Anonymousreply 5101/15/2013

must be because bottoms are becoming more like tops 'psychologically' and tops more like bottoms.

by Anonymousreply 5201/15/2013

R51, really?

by Anonymousreply 5301/15/2013

Who are these anti-anal sex posters on DL? I have NEVER met a gay man in real life who doesn't enjoy fucking an ass or being fucked. Only on DL have I come across gay men with such an intense aversion to it.

by Anonymousreply 5401/15/2013

I lived with a gay guy who wasn't into anal. He just liked j/o with other guys. So weird.

by Anonymousreply 5501/15/2013

What's so odd about not doing anal? For the bottom, it takes a ton of prep, can be incredibly painful, and makes him so much more susceptible to HIV (yes, even WITH CONDOMS, which aren't foolproof). There are so many other safer, less painful ways to feel intimate and get off with another guy, why even bother with anal? Sexual encounters for me include tons and tons of foreplay, followed by some mutual JO, or, if I feel comfortable with the guy, oral sex. That's how it's done.

by Anonymousreply 5601/15/2013

no, it isn't

by Anonymousreply 5701/15/2013

r54, it's because a LOT of gays- ones you aren't aware of happily- are very damaged goods.

by Anonymousreply 5801/15/2013

R55, I did, too. In addition, he only really liked having sex on Sunday mornings, when he knew his parents were in church. Except we didn't live anywhere near his parents.

Some people just don't want to be gay.

I moved out before the lease ended.

by Anonymousreply 5901/15/2013

hear, hear

by Anonymousreply 6001/15/2013

[quote]In addition, he only really liked having sex on Sunday mornings, when he knew his parents were in church. Except we didn't live anywhere near his parents.

lol r59

Some dudes just love getting filled up with throbbing dick, the preparation is worth it to them. And Im glad they exist! I dont know about the rest of you hoes

by Anonymousreply 6101/15/2013

[quote]Getting fucked doesn't make you a girl or 'feminine' anymore than throwing on a strap on makes a dyke 'the man'.

The hell it doesn't. If you're a man on his back with his legs up ang getting fucked, you are most certainly the "girl" in the situation. I also agree that anal is just not for everybody. It's painful as fuck (no pun intended), takes a lot of prep, and, unless you are in a committed monogamous relationship, it's pretty dangerous. And those are just some of the cons.

by Anonymousreply 6201/15/2013

Are you a top r62?

by Anonymousreply 6301/15/2013

[quote]And those are just some of the cons.

geez, mary, what are the others? Hang-nails? Smudged eyeliner?

by Anonymousreply 6401/15/2013

I just can't respect any so-called gay man that doesn't bottom. To me, they have major hangups and I just avoid those guys.

by Anonymousreply 6501/15/2013

Right on R65 - I totally agree - it's so fucking limiting and too much role playing if only one person gets to be top or bottom. It's an unequal relationship.

What's worse is that a sexual partner has to be of certain physical height or other in order to bottom.

Just fucking enjoy yourselves. Jesus Christ.

by Anonymousreply 6601/15/2013

[quote]geez, mary, what are the others? Hang-nails? Smudged eyeliner?

Fissures, tears, etc. etc. etc.

by Anonymousreply 6701/15/2013

[quote]I just can't respect any so-called gay man that doesn't bottom. To me, they have major hangups and I just avoid those guys.

No hang ups here. I just don't enjoy it. Not everyone wants his ass plowed. It's exit only for me.

by Anonymousreply 6801/15/2013

[quote]Fissures, tears, etc. etc. etc.

i guess I've been doing it wrong all of these years then because I've never had tears or any of those things

by Anonymousreply 6901/16/2013

R24 that'a a malfunction, not a design issue.

Just sayin.

by Anonymousreply 7001/16/2013

R70, most women naturally become "drier" as they age.

by Anonymousreply 7101/16/2013

Some, not most, R71.

But anyway, the comparison remains false.

by Anonymousreply 7201/16/2013

Let's not forget that gay guys rarely, if ever, had anal sex before the 1970s. It was just not part of the sexual menu. Until then, it was pretty much just blow jobs and JO. The sexual revolution was responsible for the explosion of anal sex in the gay community. That's been posted here many times.

by Anonymousreply 7301/16/2013

Disagree, R72. It is true that most women do dry up after menopause. Also, even young women need lube at times depending on cycles, moods, medications....or if they're having marathon sex. The vag isn't a lube factory. There are limits to how much can be "produced" just like there are limits to how much jizz a man can shoot.

by Anonymousreply 7401/16/2013

R73, I thought there were hieroglyphics on cave walls depicting anal sex between men in ancient times.

by Anonymousreply 7501/16/2013

r75, I wasn't talking about ancient times. I meant in the past several hundread years in the western world. Besides those hieroglyphics were symbolic of a man's dominance over other men. Those drawings were not literal.

by Anonymousreply 7601/16/2013

Oh, dear! All this talk about how painful and wrong anal sex is!

That's it. I'm turning to women now. It'll just be easier!

by Anonymousreply 7701/16/2013

It's strange to hear gay men say anal sex is emasculating or feminine. I've never done it.

by Anonymousreply 7801/16/2013

[quote]Let's not forget that gay guys rarely, if ever, had anal sex before the 1970s. It was just not part of the sexual menu.

I invented anal sex.

by Anonymousreply 7901/16/2013

I had been a top for most of my gay life. It was when I realized that it was neither emasculating nor feminizing that I fnally relaxed and enjoyed being a bottom.

And boy do I enjoy it!

by Anonymousreply 8001/16/2013

Disagree all you want, R74.

It's not an opinion, it's a fact. The vagina is designed to lubricate. It usually does, unless another condition is present, or in the case of overuse (as you mentioned). Of course it can become dry after menopause--it's not intended to be functional after menopause.

Now no one is saying that you can't use any hole in the body for any damn thing you please--male or female--but to equate the vagina with the anus in terms of function and, specifically, lubrication, is silly and completely unnecessary.

by Anonymousreply 8101/16/2013

God, you sound horrid!

by Anonymousreply 8201/16/2013

Because I can't get it up anymore.

by Anonymousreply 8301/16/2013

I don't. I prefer total mutuality, not role playing.

by Anonymousreply 8401/16/2013

please, all these dry pussy whores complaining of vaginal dryness. get out of here with that. it's the main reason why ky was invented folks. i mean seriously there are some extreme anally retentive gays in the world but that don't change the fact that some of us have matured beyond freud's first stage of sexual development. i completely understand your stand against 'fucking' but against all anal play. no fingers, prostate massagers, anal beads, please. you missing some seriously pleasurable o's. next time when your in the shower and your soaping up your cock, balls, and ass. go ahead and give yourself permission to stick a finger up there while stroking your cock and then tell me what you think, ok. it's a helluva way to start off the morning.

by Anonymousreply 8501/16/2013

and let's not confused meat with fish. just because a guy tosses up his legs does not a girl make. get it right gays.

by Anonymousreply 8601/16/2013

[quote]just because a guy tosses up his legs does not a girl make.

No, not anatomically, but still...

by Anonymousreply 8701/16/2013

Saves on Viagra,

by Anonymousreply 8801/16/2013

Because it's the most private place on my body that I can offer a man. For me, it's so erotic to feel a man's penis enter me.

by Anonymousreply 8901/16/2013

[quote]I had been a top for most of my gay life. It was when I realized that it was neither emasculating nor feminizing that I fnally relaxed and enjoyed being a bottom

Yes anal is just one way that two guys can bring each other to their sexual peaks. Its really doesnt involve that feminizing stuff for me at least.

by Anonymousreply 9001/16/2013

Emotional transference

by Anonymousreply 9101/16/2013

It's not really that private when you're offering it to him in the Ramble though.

by Anonymousreply 9201/16/2013

What's so "girly" about anal sex? To me it sounds like a weird hang-up, no better than straight men who are terrified of doing something "faggy."

by Anonymousreply 9301/16/2013

It's not so much the act as it is the "position".

by Anonymousreply 9401/16/2013

if it is doggy style then it's manly, if the position in missionary then it's girly

by Anonymousreply 9501/16/2013

Right, particularly if the bottom guy's legs are up over the top's shoulders.

by Anonymousreply 9601/16/2013

then the bottom will truly become a girly-man

by Anonymousreply 9701/16/2013

But what if I want to watch his face while I'm fucking him? I cant do that without making him a girly man?

by Anonymousreply 9801/17/2013

Like I said, seems like an immature hang-up.

by Anonymousreply 9901/17/2013

It's not feminizing, it's intimate.

by Anonymousreply 10001/17/2013

i just want to say from personal experience that there are tons and i do mean tons of str8 guys that love to get their asses played with. any bona fide, dyed in the wool, cocksucker can attest to this. so all these str8-acting gays, just jump on board because it's already happening. oh yeah talk to your fellow t-girls. they will tell you the same. some even like to get their hole poked. so you see the 'girly' thing is just an illusion, right?

by Anonymousreply 10101/17/2013

you see a str8 guy typically can't ask his gf to lick or play with his ass but he can ask you and even when he don't, he doesn't protest to the same. you guys problem is you're mistaking appearance for reality. the gift of being gay is you can now see through and even dispell the illusion. this is unique to our breed. you guys need to embrace it.

by Anonymousreply 10201/17/2013

Take your meds, dude.

by Anonymousreply 10301/17/2013

no need to worry they're taken guy, calm down

by Anonymousreply 10401/17/2013

R98, fuck him in front of a mirror

by Anonymousreply 10501/17/2013

I feel it is the closest intimacy to have that penis inside me.

by Anonymousreply 10601/19/2013

he's fun to be degraded like that, I love feeling like a horny slut that way

by Anonymousreply 10701/19/2013

"If the anus was meant to be a sex organ, why doesn't it self-lubricate?"

It kinda does, when your sexy ass makes a top want to spit down a slimy load of saliva into your mangina.

by Anonymousreply 10801/20/2013

I've been a bottom since I was 10 years old and was the girl from my older cousins. Over the years I really enjoyed being a man pleaser who really love sucking cock and taking it like a girl should. I always cum when i'm fucked in the asspussy and I always feel very girly and feminine when i'm with a man.

by Anonymousreply 10905/12/2014

Because I have no interest in the other man touching my cock. I am there to serve and please him by sucking his cock hard and then taking it in my hot tight ass. I cum just from being fucked hands-free and sometime I cum just from the thrill of sucking the other guy off. I love cumming when being drilled by a rock hard cock and I feel like a total buttslut that way!

by Anonymousreply 11011/24/2014
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