I hate Melissa Rivers

So do I

She lives off of her mother's fame and seems as nasty as her too.

What makes her really ridiculous is that she thinks she DOESN'T live off of her mother.

"Hate" will poison your soul.

I'm so tired of her one-trick schtick which consists of following mommy around like the human centipede, and every time mommy makes a joke act humiliated, nod head back and forth and say, "Oh, mom." Lather, rinse, repeat. Over and over and over and over and over. She is the most insufferable thing ever to be forced on the American public with the possible exception of Willow and Jaden Smith.

Has Melissa ever done ANYTHING without her parasitic host?

Really, R5? Do you think either of them cares as long as you keep watching their stupid ass show.

I don't watch their show. I'm actually watching Wendy Williams on my Tivo at the moment, and Joan and her parasite are co-hosting. I LOVE Joan on her own and watch her religiously on Fashion Police, but any time Melissa is forced upon me I just get the urge to purge hardcore. Their fake show on WE would be way too much for me to stomach.

Melissa bugged me until she did Celebrity Apprentice. I wouldn't say I'm a fan but I learned not to hate the sight of her face or the sound of her voice.

I saw her on Celeb Apprentice too and she came across as a fucking spoiled brat. Hate her guts.

Her horse mouth juts out so far she can't even close her horse lips.

What would charisma-challenged Melissa be doing if her mother wasn't famous and providing her with employment opportunities?

R11 Target cashier

R11, she would have found some other way to make money or some other profession or set of skills, as everyone in life does who needs to make money.

"She is the most insufferable thing ever to be forced on the American public with the possible exception of Willow and Jaden Smith."

You can say that again.

You must relish watching Melissa - you love to hate her - since most of us never see her at all.

If your mom was Joan Rivers, how do you think YOU would have turned out?

R15 Like I said before, I love Joan--so I do go out of my way to watch anything with Joan in it. Unfortunately that almost always means Melissa is trailing two steps behind her.

I actually find Melissa to be much more authentic than her mother. She seems to have a sense of propriety that Joan totally lacks. While the "show" seems entirely scripted and/or contrived, the two ladies are essentially playing themselves. Melissa seems like she's trying to be a good mother as well as a competent producer (of Fashion Police). Her fat ugly boyfriend apparently cheated on her and she's now dating some shlubby porn impresario. With her horse face, it's going to be tough for her to land a hot guy. However, her son Cooper remarkably inherited none of the Rosenberg a/k/a River horse-face look. He's either a carbon copy of his daddy or adopted. In any event, he's a cute kid and will likely grow into a handsome man.

Melissa's ex-husband, father of Cooper, is a very good looking guy.

R18 Fine, Melissa can be as authentic as she wants to be. That doesn't make her interesting or talented in the least. Get her off my television!

I´d love for anyone of you bitches to go through life as a child of a celeb, have your husband/father kill himself, and then see what kind of bond you have with your mother. I´m surprised their relationship is as healthy as it is.

In the Joan documentary I got a sense of what growing up with Joan as a mother was like. Joan Rivers is a brand and a family business, Melissa was taught at an early age that her role is to accomodate Joan because JR is a business. That is why MR is with JR all the time, she is part of JR's business brand.

R22 Okay, but she needs to stay BEHIND the scenes. I'm tired of Joan trying to make Melissa "happen."

Her son really is handsome.

r13

based on r10's comment.. if she wasn't parasiting off her mother I'm sure she would have to put that horsemouth and wide lipped capacity to good use.

some people are only good for one thing..

enter K Kardashian

Oh for christssakes, Melissa is harmless. She's fine, makes herself fairly scarce, and doesn't say anything offensive. She's not on drugs; she's never been in trouble. Her curse is being related to an extremely successful parent like many other show business kids. So she's not as successful as her mother. BFD.

Does her mother, Joan, support her? Yeah, she probably does. But Melissa also has her own income. She's executive producer of Fashion Police. That must bring in some income. Melissa probably has a pretty decent life raising her son.

I love the fact that her ex-husband was a horse trainer

Well you'd have to be into bestiality to have sex with that horse.

Mellisa has always reminded me of a fug version of Kate Beckinsale, same long face, big mouth and huge teeth, but somehow that doesn't work for Melissa!

Melissa does have gorgeous hair and it's clear she's had some plastic surgery, a nose job definitely and probably some nips and tucks over the years.

Both her parents were not exactly attractive people, it's truly a miracle her young son is cute, thankfully he didn't inherit the Rosenberg/Rivers looks!

Man, if she's had work done I'd hate to see her before!

What is up with the cast of her reality show? Who the hell are those people?

"Man, if she's had work done I'd hate to see her before!"

Melissa definitely had a nose job. She looked like her father when she was a kid and he was not a looker!

There must be some pre-surgery photos of her online. I'm too tired to look!

Is today Opposite Day, R8?

Just on principle, I tend to be contemptuous of untalented celebrity spawn who leech off their famous parents. And admittedly, I've never seen the Joan/Melissa reality TV show or any of the other TV things they've done together. But I did see the Joan Rivers documentary and I thought that Melissa came as surprisingly shrewd, level-headed, and insightful.

So based on that, I'm not a hater. The girl seemed to have turned out pretty OK, especially given the heap o' crazy she was dealing with -- famous parents, showbiz lifestyle, neurotic obsessive (albeit loving) mom, dad who committed suicide. I'll cut her some slack, thank you.

[quote] I've never seen the Joan/Melissa reality TV show or any of the other TV things they've done together.

Well that explains it then.

What do you think Melissa's had done?

She looked more normal before. She horse-i-fied herself.

Just saw a Turbo Tax commercial starring Joan..........and Melissa. In it they're going through some woman's closet picking apart her wardrobe. What I'd like to know is, who gave Melissa the right to judge peoples' fashion?

"What do you think Melissa's had done?"

It's clear in the 1993 linked photo that Melissa already had her nose done. She actually looks like Melissa 'Shitbra' Gilbert in that 93 pic!

They must have gone to the same LA plastic surgeon for those cookie cutter nose jobs.

Hmmm....my guess is you don't actually know her (which by the way neither do I). how can you hate someone you've never met, who is a hardworking individual setting a wonderful example for her son? My guess is your JEALOUS!

Has anyone seen the grotesque TV movie where they play themselves in their own life story, Tears and Laughter: The Joan and Melissa Rivers story? Till I saw this I liked Joan and thought she kept it real, but this level of tacky was too much.

I wish it was on youtube and someone needs to throw it back in their face. Melissa is the worst.

R41 LMAO! Yes, I remember that shitty TV movie when it came out - I want to say like '91 or '92. It was SO self-indulgent.

I CAN NOT UNDERSTAND WHY ALL YOU FOLKS ARE CUTTING MELISSA DOWN SO. I DON'T KNOW OF ANYTHING BAD ABOUT THE GIRL. SHE" NO MORE OF A SPOILED BRAT THAN ALOT OF THE OTHER KIDS OF PEOPLE WHO HAVE FAME AND FORTUNE AND AS FAR AS LOOKS GO I'M SURE YOU ALL HAVE SOME KIND OF FLAW SOMEWHERE ON YOUR FACE OR BODY. WE ALL CAN'T BE BEAUTIFUL ON THE OUTSIDE BUT AT LEAST WE CAN TRY TO BE IN HEART. THE ONE THING THAT IS SO WONDERFUL ABOUT A TV IS WE CAN CHANGE THE CHANNEL IF WE COME ACROSS SOMETHING WE DON'T LIKE. I LIKE THE SHOW. I THINK THEY ARE A CLOSE NIT FAMILY WITH LOVE FOR EACH OTHER. HOW DO YOU FIND FAULT IN THAT. BETTER THAN THE SHOW 1000 WAYS TO DIE WHICH SHOWS WHAT A SICKLY EVIL BEAST DWELLS IN HUMANS. BUT THATS MY OPINION AND OPINIONS ARE LIKE ASSHOLES, WE ALL HAVE ONE. TAKE CARE AND TRY TO FIND SOMETHING GOOD TO SAY ABOUT PEOPLE INSTEAD OF TRYING TO CUT THEM DOWN OVER STUPID THINGS THAT DON'T MATTER.

Here's a link to a fabulous, bitchy tell-all interview by the former manager of Cher and Joan Rivers including a truly shocking incident involving Joan and Melissa on Celebrity Apprentice.

Not sure why she didn't inherit the humor gene- she is not funny at all. But maybe there is none; maybe you have to get that cynicism playing in dive clubs for years.

You Melissa haters will enjoy this interview with Mr Sammeth.

I love how Melissa says she wants her privacy during her breakup with Jason, yet she has the entire thing filmed and runs it on her awful reality show. I wonder if she'll do the same with the porn king she's supposedly dating now.

That interview only reinforced what I believed about Joan. She only respects money. She didn't like Melissa's boyfriend. He wasn't rich enough for her. When she was talking about him, she mentions he never picked up a check. That's what's important to her, not that he was a great father to her grandson. The Pornographer is rich, so he gets the respect.

He was trolling on Craigslist for sex.

Joan's only problem is she can dish it out but she can't take it. She was probably making Whitney drug jokes two minutes after they carried the corpse out of the building but no one dare criticize Melissa, who only has a career because she popped out of Joan's pussy.

R44 Wow, I already never did like or trust Joan or Melissa, but this interview shows they're even worse than I thought.

I'm not surprised about the Cher revelations either - the last several years her career has been a joke and it's been about money instead of quality.

[quote]TRY TO FIND SOMETHING GOOD TO SAY ABOUT PEOPLE INSTEAD OF TRYING TO CUT THEM DOWN OVER STUPID THINGS THAT DON'T MATTER.

Yes, we should follow the example set by your mom, Lissi

I feel sorry for Melissa.

The day her mother dies, Melissa's career will die, too.

[quote]Tears and Laughter: The Joan and Melissa Rivers

Oh yeah, that. *eyeroll*

Ole Joan was yapping about how Missy should get an emmy nom and she said that with a straight face.

Joan picking on fat people and "dancers."

On the call sheet on the mirror of "The Fashion Police" studio it said Joan arrives at 4:00am and then the Emmy show was taped around 7:00am. Why the Hell do they have to tape that show so early? What's the point?

R40 I wouldn't hate her if she wasn't forced down our throats 24/7. Like I said before, I love Joan and will watch anything she's in--but she INSISTS on bringing that talentless cling-on with her every chance she gets! I wish Joan would just get it through her head that her daughter is NOT cut out for television! Or radio. Or anything involving entertainment. Melissa is boring and should be working retail where she belongs. I can see her working at Target or Gymboree or TJ Maxx. At the very least she needs to say BEHIND the cameras. Once she puts herself on television, she's fair game for criticism.

And I LOVE that Daily Beast article!

I always confuse her with Melissa Gilbert.

They were both on "The Talk" yesterday. They weren't just unfunny, they were dull. Joan tried a few jokes and it sounded like she was lost without her cue cards. I sort of felt sorry for her.

[quote]They were both on "The Talk" yesterday. They weren't just unfunny, they were dull. Joan tried a few jokes and it sounded like she was lost without her cue cards. I sort of felt sorry for her.

Joan is about as funny now as George Burns was when he was 80...in other words, not very funny.

How much of that show is fake? The boyfriend was basically humiliated on national tv.

R61, that's like asking how much of Joan River's face is fake. It's safe to assume that 99% is fake. Besides, Joan and Melissa wouldn't know a real emotion if it slapped them in their faces, real or fake.

When Melissa changed her name and took her mother's stage surname, she really made it clear whose career she was riding on. After all, we don't have a singer named Liza Garland, do we?

I personally thought Melissa changed her last name because Rivers sounds less Jewish than Rosenberg. Of course, who knew she would be forever joined at the hip to her Yenta mama.

But everyone already knows that she's Jewish r64, so why change it for that reason?

Maybe R65, the same reason Joan and Melissa have a Christmas tree?

She's phenomenal.

Some people are members of the lucky "egg " club. Never to truly gave a job or purpose in life but to be a parasite off of the original host. Nothing is more repugnent than those Kardashians. Just what besides being sluts, have they ever done. That mother should be shot ---an ugly smelly old broad who was in bankruptcy court before her daughter spread her legs for all to see.THEY MAKE MELISSA RIVERS SEEM LIKE A PRINCESS. TALK ABOUT TRASH -----IN THE DICTIONARY, THEY JUSY SAY "KARDASHIAN " NEXT TO TRASH AND WHOREDOM.

I hated her more before I saw JOAN RIVERS: A PIECE OF WORK, which made it pretty clear neither Joan nor Melissa thinks Melissa is talented: they only do projects together because Joan feels she stinted Melissa on being there for her when melissa was a child and Joan is still an absolute workaholic, Joan feels the only way she can get to see enough of Melissa now is if they work together on projects.

the problem I always have with this, though, is there's no reason why Melissa can't work behind the scenes. but I think Melissa has finally realized the public is never going to accept her without her mother and is trying to do more of her work behind the scenes.

Melissa's not a bad person; she just has no business being in front of a camera.

Melissa's actually a very cool person who is nice to everyone she meets. She kind of like Jamie Lee Curtis in that regard.

I've seen her be very, very, kind to people on the street--so let's be kind to Melissa.

Did she ever donate her retina to anyone?

Having Joan as her mother qualifies her for some kind of Nobel Peace prize.

R44. Thanks for posting that interview about Cher and Joan Rivers. I love them both warts and all, but damn, that interview was not kind. And probably rightfully so. Show business is often a shitty, unethicaal businesss.

I can't stand her either. She seems like a spoiled jerk. I know she can't help her face but man. Horse city. And she says I'd be more upset if people called her fatass but gone on you can hide an ass. That face is out there!!! And that stupid shocked shaking head look she gives when Joan says something "shocking" Uggggghh. And no I do not watch their show. I am however bombarded by the advertisement clips for that stupid show. Like when Joan says that old clam looks like Betty whites vagina. Really??? She's like 3 years younger.

She needs a good 3 or 4 inches sanded off of that chin and head...damn she is nasty

It's as though someone slammed the door on a ferret's face, and then slammed it again, and again, and...

I love Joan but hate Melissa too. I do not watch their show because I can't stand Melissa and because it's totally fake. I watched them on Celebrity Apprentice (another show I normally never watch) out of pure curiosity. CA made me realize what a hard worker Joan is with a great work ethic, etc.

While it's sweet and somewhat admirable how Joan takes care of Melissa, I feel it's also a disservice to her because I'm not convinced that girl can function on her own without Joan. With any luck Melissa won't be able to get work after Joan dies and she'll just live a quiet life living off Joan's millions.

Joan Rivers and her husband were two people who should never have had a child. The fact that they chose to reproduce both their unfortunate looks ANC considerable neuroses only exposes how self-indulgent and narcissistic many straight people are. Just because you can do something doesn't mean you should.

I think Joan Rivers is a riot. One of the funniest comics in the business and outrageous in the Lenny Bruce mold.

Her daughter plays the straight "man". It's a schtick you knumbskulls. It's just couched in a show like Fashion Police. It's old as the hills, Vaudeville even.

Yeah she is no great talent- but her Mom sure is a ball of nearly 80 year old artificial fire and I think she is funny as hell.

I don't watch the show very much, but good God, it at least has a talent at its core and is funny- unlike the rest of reality TV which is appauling. And if you do not like Joan's brand of humor, well, don't watch her (and her daughter.)

Melissa wanted to be an actress. Good luck with that! She couldn't even convincingly play herself.

1:55

I think the main reason that their WE is so transparently staged is because Melissa is such a terrible actress that can't she even seem believable playing HERSELF.

I like Melissa, but I find the way she talks to be VERY annoying. Her teeth are too big and if affects the way she speaks.

That british guy she's banging on "Joan Knows Best" is hot.

That British guy, R83, is almost definitely a hired actor.

Bump

I really think most of you have over reacted. I think her Mother has a lot of control over her as well as they are very close. Lots of parents who have businesses have their children involved. Joan just happens to be an entertainer. Melissa has a job and keeps reminding her Mom. She is an only child and I don't think she is spoiled in the way people are insinuating here. I think she is actually shy in certain ways. Her Mother is more of a steamroller type. Do you think all the actors who are kids of famous actors like Will Smith's son didn't get some help? They seem to be doing a lot of movies together. I don't think it is fair to judge someone you do not know. She is a pretty lady.

Wow, how ugly and untaleted! Worst thing Joan R. ever produced.

the ugliest woman on the screen. inside and out

Oh, good. More straight cunts googling and finding the site.

I like Melissa. I bought her book at the dollar tree. It was fun.

Stop hating on her, she is a mench.

Melissa Rivers is actually a very sweet, down-to earth lady who is kind to shop girls, cahiers, and waitresses.

Like R90 said, she is a mench.

[quote]Her teeth are too big and if affects the way she speaks.

I like big teeth.

she's effeminate.

[quote]Melissa Rivers is actually a very sweet, down-to earth lady who is kind to shop girls, cahiers, and waitresses.

WHORE PIT VIPER!

Why did she get divorced? It seems as if they were only married a couple of years. Did he cheat or did Joan's meddling get to be too much?

I love it when the crazy, caps lock people find Datalounge. Their insanity is hilarious. See also: Robin Roberts and Today show threads.

I think that hating a person you don't even know is a bit much but trying to turn her into a celebrity because of her mother's fame is totally ridiculous. Joan should be trying to find a separate venue that would explore her daughter's own talents rather than her mother's as a celebrity tagalong. Now she's joined Hollywood's endless list of reality TV's no talent celebrities like the Kardashian clan, Kelley Osborne, Tory Spelling etc.

I think the show works actually. I just fast-fwd through scenes with Melissa and one of her friends/therapists/Cooper.

What will Melissa do Mommy Joan kicks the bucket?

Mel's latest headshot...

Melissa must be doing something right, her son is a well mannered polite young man.

Yea, R100…she hired a good nanny.

[quote]It's a schtick you knumbskulls.

He misspells forty percent of his words and thinks WE'RE stupid.

R98, like the Pharoahs, Joan has stipulated in her will that when she dies, Melissa will be buried alive in the mausoleum with her.

Melissa rivers,the kardashians, Kelly osbourne and many more of these types of tv famous people, are not talented. Their only contribution to entertainment is to occupy air space. It's a 15 minutes of fame thing. Stop talking about them...and they will go away!

R104 is right. But now even the mainstream news seems fascinated with the TransJenner!

And you have shit quality Bravo promoting more and more of this sheer garbage.

Institute a special tax on ALL reality programming, and double it if that is on E or Bravo.

Put the tax toward developing QUALITY entertainment, similar to the Brit's TV tax.

Love the TV tax idea. Doubt the US conservatives would go for any tax for quality programming or journalism.

The woman needs to shut up. Does anyone have a bag of oats to hang around her neck?

I actually think Melissa had shown a lot of class these past few months. She's surprised me.

Well maybe a lot of class for a JEW. But not for a regular person.

She's not bad for a Jew, but you can't really expect much from that sort.

I’m guessing she’s a Republican bitch if this tweet of hers is anything to go by.