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So where do the Dallas gays live?

I know Oak Lawn is the official gayborhood, but where else should I be looking if I move there? And where do they go in the summer-time (i.e. what is their Fire Island, Rehoboth, etc.)? Any advice to an incoming transplant is much appreciated!%0D %0D Thanks y'all!

by Anonymousreply 4712/11/2013

OP: You will meet the flakiest bunch of queens that you never imagined would be possible.

This crowd is EXTREMELY impressed with themselves. & Think Dallas is the Center of the Known World.

They know everyone else in town and swear they hate them all, yet there they are, with their same insular crowd at the same trendy places, watering holes, and gyms week after week.

And no one is FROM Dallas! I have yet to meet a Dallas native (they're extremely rare) who wasn't a great guy. But the queens who move here from their little towns in Louisiana, Oklahoma, New Mexico, Mississippi, etc. -- ugh! The worst!

OP, do yourself a favor and rethink your plans. Dallas is OVAH! And hot as hell, but not in the good way.

by Anonymousreply 108/02/2010

Dallas native here. r1 is, alas, mostly spot on. Many gays you meet are not from Dallas and bring a lot of their small town damage with them. Instead of dealing with the internalized homophobia brought on by years spent in their hellish hometowns, those poor boys, umm, do a lot of shopping.

The real Dallas, doubly alas, is somewhat hard to break into. Even harder to know well. I can't imagine what outsiders do.

by Anonymousreply 208/02/2010

I'm from a tiny town in the Ozarks and know better than to look down on anyone, but Dallas has the worst.people.I.have.ever.known.

by Anonymousreply 308/02/2010

Oak Cliff where Lee H. Oswald used to live, is the No. 2 'hood for gays, but there are lots of gays in Deep Ellum, McKinney Ave. and City Park. In the burbs there are many gays, but some more than others (e.g., Las Colinas section of Irving)

by Anonymousreply 408/02/2010

OP, I think you get the idea by now. But I do travel there for work about three to four times per month. It is a city full of gay men VERY, VERY impressed with themselves. And for the life of me, I can't see why. Dallas is just a little oil patch town that grew...but these boys think of it as the "Paris of the South". Good luck, OP! You have been warned.

by Anonymousreply 508/02/2010

This native Dallas gay doesn't live in the gayborhood or Oak Cliff, but in a great suburb with old houses and huge trees. Surrounded by straights of all types and we love it.

by Anonymousreply 608/02/2010

[quote]Dallas is OVAH!

[smirk]

by Anonymousreply 708/02/2010

WHY are you moving here OP? If I were you, I'd turn around before I even got here. It's fucking awful.

Btw it's noon, and it's already 106 degrees. Hottest part of the day is yet to come.

by Anonymousreply 808/02/2010

The saying used to be : Dallas goes to NYC, sees a few Broadway musicals and returns thinking that makes them terribly sophisticated.

Houston goes to Paris or London, sees great museums and tries the local cuisine, and returns thinking "We aint sophisticated but we got great Bar-B-Q"

by Anonymousreply 908/02/2010

Again, Dallas is very hard on outsiders. Houston, though, is incredibly friendly and open.

by Anonymousreply 1008/02/2010

You all so perfectly awful and mean.

by Anonymousreply 1108/02/2010

I grew up in the Dallas scene. To give you a clue, I'm now ten years separated from the place and it was only five years ago I stopped believing I should never enter a door in public that wasn't held open for me or that didn't open automatically.

Yes, Mary. And I was QUEEN Mary, too.

Anyone remember Lime?

by Anonymousreply 1208/02/2010

OP here - have lived in NY for 23 years and moving to Dallas next year for work. Figuring it will be a 3-year gig, but am open to whatever happens. I'm pretty easy-going and can take or leave attitudes - the only Dallas guys I've ever met were in New Orleans and may have been in "holiday" mode, so they seemed cool. I do appreciate all the feedback, even the negative, but the move is most likely happening and is a great career move, so I'm 99% likely to follow through on it. Keep the observations coming, especially on getaway spots, though I can research that online as well. I'll still get back to F.I.P. for at least a week or two every summer, but would like to find some place fun near Dallas for random weekends, etc.

by Anonymousreply 1308/02/2010

There are no get away spots near Dallas. Have you ever been here before?

by Anonymousreply 1408/02/2010

*Maybe* Lake Travis outside Austin, but that might be stretching it.

by Anonymousreply 1508/02/2010

OP, r14 is misinformed. The Hill Country is 2.5 hours by car and there are any number of terrific getaways there. New Mexico is an hour by plane. Austin is wonderful too. If you're a beach person, meh, Galveston is too far and kind of icky, but it's got some amazing architecture and funk. One must love Galveston the way one loves a slightly retarded though very dear relative.

As for Dallas, you should probably live near McKinney Ave and/or Turtle Creek. The azaleas are amazing in the spring...

by Anonymousreply 1608/02/2010

The interesting thing about this thread is that virtually everyone, whether pro- or anti-Dallas, buys into the mingling of personal identity and the city of residence, and the sweeping generalizations that go with it.

I've lived in a bunch of places, and traveled everywhere in the U.S., and the reality is different: People are pretty much the same wherever you go, a mixed bag. That includes the homos.

OP, steer clear of anyone who has such a weak sense of self that they overly identify with Dallas, or with any other place.

by Anonymousreply 1708/02/2010

[quote]Keep the observations coming, especially on getaway spots

Sorry, I interpreted this to refer to nearby gay spots, rather like what Provincetown, Rehoboth or Fire Island are to the big East Coast cities. Dallas has nothing like that nearby, though of course you can fly anywhere you want.

by Anonymousreply 1808/02/2010

OP:

Someone has to say, so I will.

NO JOB is worth Dallas.

Any other paths your career can take?

by Anonymousreply 1908/02/2010

I agree with you r17. But much of the Dallas gay population identifies with what they think Dallas is, aping what they sense are the norms and modes of whatever they imagine the Dallas' ruling classes might be, all while letting their own small town wounds and debilitations fester and rot. For them, the journey out of East Texas or Arkansas or Oklahoma and into some Prada and Lip Gloss sadness constitutes the whole identity. It's excruciating.

OP should also join the young patrons assocs at the DMA, the Nasher, the Opera. And if you stay, try and get invited to join Leadership Dallas.

by Anonymousreply 2008/02/2010

Truth is, Dallas is what you make of it. Yes, Dallas is hard to break into - hell, I've lived here since 1992 and still don't feel as though I belong to the gay community. Then again, I'm more of an introvert and it's at least partially my fault that I haven't made more gay long-lasting friends. I do have some wonderful straight friends though.

I lived in Oak Lawn for over a decade, but wasn't much for the bars (after two or three years anyway). Did I have my fair share of sex - yes. But nothing ever really amounted to much. I do lack some qualities that make you a 'wanted' item in Dallas - I'm of average looks (cute to some, nothing special to others), I don't tan, I don't have a gym membership and I don't care that I'm driving a car that was new when I bought it 12 years ago - and I don't know the first thing about proper fashion. Okay, that's my snark out of the way :-)

But I imagine if you are the least bit extroverted, Dallas could work for you. There are sports clubs and gyms and churches and political groups, all of which afford you the opportunity to meet like minded people. It is still difficult - even some of the nicest people are still a bit cliquish (protective?) - but it can be done.

Now, Austin - I left there to move to Dallas, looking for work after school. That's my home away from home - that's where I feel like I belong - but going back there and finding a job in my industry is an uphill battle.

by Anonymousreply 2108/02/2010

r16, I have lived here my whole life. A) There are no getaway spots near Dallas. B) Hill country is boring as fuck and there is no social scene there. C) Austin is okay, but traffic fucking sucks and the "public transportation" is even worse there than it is here.

r1/r19 and r18 are right.

by Anonymousreply 2208/02/2010

Dallas gays like Jefferson, TX for getaways

by Anonymousreply 2308/02/2010

23 -- The antebellum-ish town in NE TX?

by Anonymousreply 2408/02/2010

Provincetown has become a very popular getaway for Dallas gays in the last few years, but it takes a whole day to get to. I always run into several Dallas gays everytime I'm there.%0D %0D Dallas gays travel a lot, since there's nothing to do here but shop. DFW airport makes it easy to hop on a plane and go wherever you want.

by Anonymousreply 2508/02/2010

R21, for what it's worth, you sound like the first person I want to meet when I get there : )

by Anonymousreply 2608/02/2010

I screen captured this a couple of days ago. Note the temperature, then note the time of day.

by Anonymousreply 2708/02/2010

[quote]Truth is, Dallas is what you make of it.

That's true of any big city with a bunch of gay people. Many, if not most, of the distinctions that people make between the people in various cities reflect the observer's idiosyncracies, hangups, and pure chance, not to mention a superficial level of engagement.

It's true that there are some [italic]general[/italic] differences: Seattle painfully introverted, Boston busy and standoffish, New York kind of brash, D.C. somewhat dull and government-focused, Texas and Florida friendly on the surface and not so friendly underneath, Southern California an emphasis on the trappings of affluence and (still) an addiction to real estate as sport.

But all of these things are a small part of the whole. It eventually boils down to one-on-one connections, and they are far, far more similar than they are different wherever you go.

People land in one city or another, and stay or move on, for all kinds of reasons. The idea that location determines personalities is pretty foolish.

by Anonymousreply 2808/02/2010

Ooooo...I'm seeing r21/r26 mansex, Texas style.

by Anonymousreply 2908/02/2010

All the Dallas gays I knew once lived lived near the Luby's Cafeteria. And then they died.

by Anonymousreply 3008/02/2010

Those are odd characterizations, R17 - I'm not sure I agree with all of them.%0D %0D I do agree, however, with the earlier poster who said that Houston was more inviting than Dallas. There are cunts here, to be sure... But the gays here tend to be nicer on the whole, and I'm not entirely sure why that is.%0D %0D If Dallas becomes too much to bear, please drive down to either Austin or Houston. You'll meet some genuinely kind and friendly gay men in both cities.

by Anonymousreply 3108/02/2010

"Hill Country is boring as fuck and there is no social scene there"%0D %0D A place is only as exciting as you choose to make it. As unpleasant as Dallas can be, there are definitely lots of activities, social or otherwise, to partake in within the Hill Country.

by Anonymousreply 3208/02/2010

R31, there are "genuinely kind and friendly" gay men wherever you go, and there are cunts wherever you go too. My point is that, while cities do have general characteristics, they are determinative of very little. It's always about the individuals, and never about where they live. That's why the various discussions about "the people in (insert city name)" generally leave me cold.

Trust me, I wouldn't live in Dallas (or Houston) in a million years. But it's not 'cause the people are stuck up, or stupid, or whatever. It's mainly because of the godawful summer weather, and the lack of the kind of scenery and ambiance that I find attractive.

The key there is "that I find." If someone else likes Dallas, Houston, etc., it's no skin off my nose, and I'll take 'em one by one.

by Anonymousreply 3308/02/2010

You totally misunderstand what I meant, R17. I'm saying that I don't agree with the way you briefly describe all the cities you list... I recognize that there are all kinds of people everywhere you go, but the characters you ascribe those cities and general regions seems off to me.

by Anonymousreply 3408/02/2010

R34, they're my own generalities, and not exactly unique to me. I don't have a lot invested in those generalizations, because in the end I don't think they matter much anyway. All of which is to say that I'm not going to argue them. If you don't see it that way, go right ahead, and you won't get a fight from me about it.

by Anonymousreply 3508/02/2010

Thanks r17/r33. Your point makes sense. I live here because of the weather. I grew up with all that scenery and cold weather and live up North almost my whole life. %0D %0D I've been here five years and while it took a while, I have made a new life here with great friends and a fantastic b/f.%0D %0D We have a group of friends who all met through a meetup group originally and kind of informally started our own group. We go to dinner, have parties, theater and even vacation together.

by Anonymousreply 3608/02/2010

Hey OP - R21 here - maybe we'll cross paths some day, and you can tell me what you would up thinking of the place.

Till then ... enjoy. :-)

by Anonymousreply 3708/03/2010

R28, R33, R17 are wrong. I suppose in a social sense he may have a point, but in the real world, the community you live in determines everything about your success in life. I challenge him to repeat his screed substituting "Detroit" for "Dallas" and not realize how absurd his statements about "it's you, not the city" are.

by Anonymousreply 3808/03/2010

I agree with you, R38.

OP: Be especially mindful of the type of queens who cannot afford the Park Cities, but want to be *close* to that idyllic area.

They flock in North Dallas, especially around the big Episcopal Church there affectional known as St. Michael's and All Cadillacs (really the name is "All Angels," but has been known for decades as the former.)

Ha!

by Anonymousreply 3908/03/2010

(R39) Do you mean St. Minks and All Cadillacs? The proper genuflection is Dallas Texas Neiman Marcus when worshipping there!

by Anonymousreply 4011/01/2013

I miss the Starck Club.

by Anonymousreply 4111/01/2013

Be sure to go to The Purple Party.

by Anonymousreply 4211/01/2013

Wuhduh Purple Party about?

by Anonymousreply 4311/01/2013

The whole Turtle Creek Chorale brouhaha on datalounge a few years back soured the whole board on Dallas. There were terrible accusations made at the time.

by Anonymousreply 4411/02/2013

Anywhere else they can.

by Anonymousreply 4512/11/2013

The big summer resort for Dallas gays is the Dairy Queen on Fort Worth Ave... It gives them an air of sophistication they lack the rest of the year.

by Anonymousreply 4612/11/2013

I got a job assignment there for six months and I met really few natives from Dallas (if at all). Most of the guys came from neighboring states such as Oklahoma, New Mexico, etc. I stayed in Las Colinas 15 miles away from downtown and hated the fact that I could not walk anywhere, I had to take the car for any short distance because it was just motorways with no sidewalks and put on 20 pounds due to this (and the delicious BBQs). But I did some square dancing and it was a lot of fun!

by Anonymousreply 4712/11/2013
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