My new neighbor is a Gargoyle.

A smoking gargoyle. Perched on a ledge.

Weird.

I'm kind of thinking you should tell the landlord. Maybe you could send an anonymous letter or something. That way you wouldn't have to worry about her seeing you go over there.

But I'd also wait a few weeks to see if her behavior changes. Or if she moves away. Or something.

Good luck.

So what's wrong with that?

She'll know it was you if you send an anon letter.

Keep shooting dirty looks.

Try closing your blinds and ignoring her for several weeks.

Shooting her dirty looks is probably the worst thing you can do. It will likely encourage her to keep being a gargoyle just to get under your skin.

OP, you're way too fucking kind. ...I'd get a fog horn and blast her off her perch.

She sounds darksided.

From your window to hers, how far is it? 15 feet? Within throwing distance?

This sounds like the beginning of a cool horror short story/film. The ending of which the protagonist (OP) won't survive.

Put a webcam on her with a sign giving her the web address. You don't have to hook it up, just put it visibly in her line of sight.

If she complains, she'll have to explain how she saw it.

r4, you are probably right. no shooting dirty looks, just close the blinds.

Walk naked around your apartment. You might also want to try jacking off in front of the window.

"The body is on the third floor, officer. I've never seen anything like it. It looks like he was savaged by some kind of...gryphon. Yes, I know it sounds ridiculous."

[quote]From your window to hers, how far is it? 15 feet? Within throwing distance?

Yep. About that. She could easily throw rocks through the windows when no one's home.

She will know it's me if the landlord speaks to her - I think I'm the only one who can see her (because of the angle, not because she's my giant rabbit friend). I guess you could see her from the street if you knew where to look.

What do you think about calling the cops from a friend's cell and saying I was walking by, saw her and thought she was going to jump? That's probably too extreme... right?

[quote]Put a webcam on her with a sign giving her the web address. You don't have to hook it up, just put it visibly in her line of sight.

Hee! I did think about this, but she could refrain from complaining and just fuck up my car.

Gorgyles! Slykicks! TAINTED!

I vote for a gargoyle webcam.

Ok, how about looking her in the eyes, make a confused look (not nasty) then drop the curtains down. Not offensive, but a what a weirdo in a way look.

How about just opening the window and saying, "hey sugar, how come you're perched out there like a gargoyle staring in my window? It's creepy as hell."

Where there's smoke, there's Rhoda.

Calling the cops from a friend's cell? Not a bad idea.

But you should wait for at least a week or so. Keep ignoring her. Then call the cops. That way she probably won't suspect you.

If she is smoking, as opposed to pouring water, isn't she technically a 'grotesque'?

Does she live alone or is she with Quasimodo?

It took until R17 to come up with something sane.

Are you kidding? Do you know how much people pay for gargoyles? Lucky bastard.

Please PLEASE!! For the love of all that is holy, install the gargoyle web cam!! (and post the link to the feed here!)

THIS THREAD IS USELESS WITHOUT GARGOYLE CAM!

Please post a picture, I cannot stop laughing at your description.

Okay. I, too, admit that I am curious. A picture would be nice.

Put on a halloween mask (the more bizarre the better) and then plant yourself on a chair in front and center of your window and point your face in her direction. Just sit there. See how long she can take it.

OP, with a single photo you coud make this thread even more legendary than the 'possum in the drawer' thread. Ball's in your court, dude.

^lmao. We'd still be talking about this at the turn of the next decade.

I WAS going to suggest calling the cops and reporting a jumper on the ledge....but now I think R28 has got it right. Step up, OP, and make this thread a DL Legend.

Jesus H. Christ, now a smoker can't even risk instant death on a ledge without some fucking KGB turning in a report.

Hey Roman, hand me the Tannis root, will ya? I bet that queen up on the third floor drinks tea.

R31, ...and what is your point?

What was it wearing? I'm cranking one out right now just thinking about it.

Okay, assuming she's out there again tomorrow night I will definitely take a picture or some video and post it.

Yell "move it along, toots" every night as you close your window.

I agree with R17. Why are you being such a drama queen about this? What the hell do you care if she's smoking out there? Really you sound like a busybody. Just talk to her like a civilized person would do and stop scheming how you can tattle on her behind her back. Good lord.

You should have opened your window and greeted her and made light of it. Maybe that would have had 2 results: she would realize that she was definitely not invisible and you might have met a neighbor who wasn't a demon after all. You could have voiced your concern about her safety - if it really is a concern and not another excuse to justify your actions.

Her being able to look in my windows would disturb me more than anything else but then you chose to live in a home with windows so close.

Check out the unnecessary voice of reason. Why won't you let us enjoy this? This is why we can't have nice things.

Get a BB gun OP.

Can you "accidentally" bump into her in a neighborly fashion when she's not perched on the ledge being a gargoyle? Perhaps adopt a neutral "Hey, how are you doin'?" kind of approach and shoot the breeze a bit. If I were you, I'd want to get an idea of what kind of person she was before taking any action. Yeah, it's irritating and fucking creepy, but better to know your enemy first, right?

Oh, yeah; gotta see this, now.

In the meantime, lets brush up on our Gargoyle's;

Don't worry, OP, it is just DL fave Grayson Hall returned from the grave and portraing her role from one of her best films!

i want a photo!!!

I love R38. But I still think OP is one uptight queen.

It's unfortunate that your windows are so close, but she's out there to smoke (since she can't in the apartment as you've noted), not to look at your pretty ass, OP. And, really, you think you're the one that's going to get sued if she falls out that window, because it's your driveway she'd land in?

Did anyone else like the animated show 'Gargoyles' from the nineties?

I believe you are hallucinating. Nothing rings true here except your paranoia. We won't believe without a webcam so off you go - don't return without a live feed.

shoot her.

when you're questioned, tell them you thought it was an intruder.

I liked it, r46.

Security camera. If she complains to the landlord or cops, tell them that you were afraid she was casing your apartment. They'd believe you over her, trust.

Right you are, R20.

I suggest calling out to her and saying hi. Say that she looks very brave being out there, especially since a recent tenant there fell and died. Something about the place being haunted.

Then laugh and wish her a pleasant evening and withdraw. Don't close the blinds or curtains, but after she goes back in shut them and leave them shut for a while.

LMAO. She sounds like a fun neighbor, btw. I'd dress up like Dracula and crouch out on my own ledge to have a smoke with her.

OP would have no liability if she fell into his driveway. I'm a lawyer, so I know.

And gargoyles do not eat people's faces or otherwise attack -- their purpose is to channel rainwater away from the sides of the building (&, in a more general sense, to defend the homestead against evil forces). I'm also a scholar.

Stop worrying, OP -- but keep the windows on that side covered.

Buy a large mirror and mount it directly across from her. Not only will it creep her out, it will reflect any bad vibes she is sending your way.

I love that idea R51!

I get that I sound a little paranoid, but it's very unsettling to have someone staring in your window from just outside it when you're on the third floor. At night. I expect that sort of thing living on the first floor - but on the third it's spooky. Like when Corey Haim looked out his 2nd floor window to find Jason Patric floating there in Lost Boys. Only Jason Patric was pretty.

Sorry, I can't provide a live web-cam (I don't have a wireless one and they cost too much to buy for this) but I do have my video camera trained on her window so that when she comes out tonight I can discreetly record footage to post. Which actually strikes me as just as creepy as what she's doing, if not more, but I promised, so I will.

[quote]And, really, you think you're the one that's going to get sued if she falls out that window, because it's your driveway she'd land in?

Actually, I bet some lawyer would take that case. Probably sue both my neighbor and me to get money from whomever they can. They might lose, but it still would be a bother. And trust me, the cops wouldn't hang around to scrub her blood off the driveway. That would be left for me to do. Ick.

Oh yeah, R55 = OP.

WTF? Get a life first...

Go find another thread, R57, and stop being a killjoy.

OP, if you're the homeowner, why do you live on the third floor?

Gargoyles don't bleed, OP.

And not even the worse ambulance chaser would include you in a lawsuit based on her falling into your driveway -- you'd be entitled to recover your defense expenses from the gargoyle & her lawyer if you were sued -- & you'd also have grounds for a malicious prosecution lawsuit against them. Her landlord might legitimately be sued, but not her neighbor -- unless you were to goad her or scare her into falling by taking pictures of her or yelling at her, etc.

Where's OP and his pictures?

If she falls on your car, you can sue her!

What do you mean there's someone on the ledge? That apartment's been empty for months!

Next time she peers though your window, smile at her and present your hole.

"I especially don't want to have to clean it up and worry about the insurance and lawsuit implications."

Totally made up post. The OP would have no liability if he/she is merely a fellow tenant of the building.

booo r65, this thread had potential. It's people like you who KILLED datalounge. You KILLED it, I tell ya!

Just grease up the ledge. Problem solved.

She just came out. I'm taping her now.

While the camera rolls...

I live on the third floor because the first and second floors are slightly larger and command more rent. Also, I hate living on first floors because, well, I don't like people right outside my windows.

And R65, I don't know much about the law in these cases and it seems I was wrong in thinking I could be sued. Thanks to the attorney and others for pointing it out. That makes me feel a little better.

The rest of you: funny suggestions - thanks!

R69 = Transparent attempts by OP to rescue the thread

Upload the video, OP.

"Yo! Azmodeus! Get to crab-walking!"

OP, put it on YouTube!

Yay Gargoyle Cam! can't wait to see, OP!

OP, your thread is in my thread watch. You better deliver with that video or else...

I still think you should use an air horn (while the camera's on).

Uploaded (processing, please wait)

GARGOYLE GARGOYLE NOW!

The only reason I came to this site tonight is for the gargoyle!

*waits in anticipation*

I'm looking up churches and buildings with gargoyles, anticpating someone with mad skills will photoshop in the op's gargoyle.

This didn't turn out well. Uploaded a large size to YouTube and they dropped the video. Uploaded a smaller size (linked) and it worked, but the quality's poor. It was dark anyway. But you can see enough to get a feel for the gargoylesqueness.

Wonderful, OP!

Did you add the soundtrack, or was that music she plays herself to accompany her gargoyle activities?

lol

Awesome, OP. I love the beginning as the Gargoyle positions herself. The soundtrack cracks me up.

Your walls need repainting.

I added the music - it's something from the Donnie Darko soundtrack. Better than hearing Olbermann's show, which was playing on my TV.

And it turns out the window frame blocks her face, so you can't see the glowing eyes very well. Still, I'm sure you can imagine them.

P.S.

This was worth the wait. Thanks for the entertainment.

Awesome! LMAO!!

That was awesome, love the soundtrack!!

Yay OP! That was hilarious and yet extremely weird. Be sure to lock your windows at night!

Just in awe. Watch it with the lights out. It's like she is watching you.

Why is she just flicking ashes everywhere? Even gargoyles should use ashtrays.

OMFG, that was fantastic! Thanks for the Gargoyle vid, OP!

And yeah, you need to speak to the landlord about her. What if she went out on that ledge drunk or high? She'd turn around and sue the owner of the house for not installing bars on the windows or something. People are so litigious these days.

Well at least it's not The Jersey Devil....

Wow, she looks so close to your window. I'd be creeped out if somebody could see into my apartment like that.

OP: In what city or town does this gargoyle reside?

SHE'S NOT A CHRISTIAN!!!

This gorgyle is ungodly!

I'M A GOD WARRIOR!!!

In the Lord's name I pray...

Nice video OP.

She totally has the gargoyle legs going on.

Is any of that smoke drifting into your apartment? That would give you a serious legal reason to complain.

Hmm. I thought she would be much more...still.

She can't be that comfortable if she's squirming around so much. It seems like an affectation, like "Ooh, I'm so dark and angst-y perched on the ledge smoking!"

OP- you should place your tv in front of the window and play the video you've shot so that she can see it from her perch. Then she'll think you're the creepy neighbor.

She reminds me of The Boy Who Could Fly.

OP, you delivered. She looks even closer to your window than I imagined, but also meaner than I imagined.

[quote]Wow, she looks so close to your window. I'd be creeped out if somebody could see into my apartment like that.

On the third floor no less. (eek!)

Thanks for the compliments, I'm glad you enjoyed it. I hate everything I film at first, but on repeated viewings this has grown on me.

While the video was being uploaded, I went into the living room and Gargoyle Gal was playing Belle and Sebastian. So I don't think she'll be trashing my car, and I don't think I'll say anything about her roost.

She's probably just finding herself and likes to do it perched on the edge of something, like Jessica Alba in Dark Angel, and Batman, and the Blur.

Perhaps she's Glinda the Good Gargoyle.

I like r102's idea.

Then again, that spider I named Leggy and tried to befriend still bit me.

This may be the best thread in the history of datalounge. The video even made it all the greater.

Does she look like this?

SEXY....!!

R102's idea is brilliant! You have to do this.

Thanks for the video, OP. I love this thread.

Thank you! I know this might be much to ask, but would you consider making periodic update videos to post? I'm jealous. I want a smoking gargoyle.

I *heart* r6.

So she'd rather crawl out onto a narrow window ledge three stories above the ground and smoke than walk down the stairs and stand in the driveway? (Or is it because the landlord only rents to non-smokers?).

I'd be interested to see how long she keeps it up. Whether she's so caught up in being a gargoyle (and really, there's no other word for it) that she sacrifices comfort, or whether she'll end up moving or quitting smoking.

Can you imagine her during a hurricane?

Is she Asian? I know Asians like to sit in the squat position. The last I heard gargoylism is an entirely European phenomenon.

Fantastic!! Thanks OP. Come back with periodic gargoyle updates!

OP is the perfect DLer. THANKS!

Okay, OP, I'll cut you more slack after seeing this video. She is rather close for comfort. Her smoking is still none of your business but her proximity is creepy. Though if she just sat in her window all day I guess she'd still be about the same distance away.

Have you even tried to be a friendly neighbor by even greeting her and welcoming her to the neighborhood? You're not required to do this, of course, but if you want something from her - like for her to stop creeping you out and encroaching on your privacy - you're more likely to suceed from a position of friendliness or perhaps concern for her safety rather than an immediate hostility.

Be careful what you say about her though, you could end up getting sued for defamation or other unpleasant causes of action. You've already arguably subjected her to public ridicule on the internet - someone could easily recognize her and tell her about it. I'm glad you didn't allow for comments on the Youtube posting.

Why yes, R118, it sounds like a great idea to approach a stranger who sits in her 3rd story window smoking and staring into your apartment. Just be friendly, that's all you need to do! Sigh. If only life really could be managed with a few simple platitudes from ABC Afterschool Specials.

I never thought anyone on DL would Stand and Deliver like you, OP. You have renewed my faith.

Let's all chip in on a professional video crew to tape her with better equipment and capture the glowing eyes. It will be an internet sensation.

r118, they are both on their respective THIRD FLOORS.

How is your "welcome to the neighborhood" supposed to be accomplished?

i see no video

The video is at r81.

Are you INSANE r69?!

Op is an instant favorite of any normal Datalounger.

Loved it. Thanks OP. Good luck with Glinda

Gee, R119 and R121, maybe a simple, "Hey. How ya doing? That looks scary. Every time I see you I'm scared you're going to fall." Some other pleasantry. She's like 10 feet away. Maybe that will break the ice. Why is simple human interaction like rocket science for some of you?

It doesn't seem like she is doing anything illegal but she is creeping out OP and I get that. If he wants something from her he needs to be straightforward and as pleasant as possible. That would be the adult thing to do. Perhaps that concept is beyond comprehension for one who is so familiar with afterschool specials.

OP, greta video. Sometimes the answer is right in front of your nose like perched on her window sill. Good luck.

Is that you OP, in that other smoking video?

OP, in the words of Ellen Degeneres, misquoting Oliver Twist, "More please, more please!"

lol, almost like getting a friend to do it for you.

OP, see if you can rig up a live Gargoyle Cam, like for the Shiba Inu puppies. You would have hundreds (or thousands) of followers immediately.

R70 here. Even I will agree that OP has delivered. I see an Indy Spirit Award in OP's future!

OP, I love you even more than the "Turkeys are outside attacking my screen door" guy.

OP is my new hero. Love that you did this.

This like an episode of Jonnie Quest.

OP -

I can not thank you enough.

Thank you.

I so hoped there would be a picture... and the video is just perfection. You've restored my faith in datalounge and your gargoyle is definitely up there with the possum in the drawer.

Thanks, OP. Love you....more! more gargoyle!

[quote]Why is simple human interaction like rocket science for some of you?

This was (probably unintentionally) hysterical. I don't think yelling nonchalantly out your window to a creepy looking woman sitting on an outside ledge 3 stories up is "simple" by any stretch of the definition.

Your typo also amuses me. I may adopt it as my nom de DL.

She's not as menacing as I imagined her.

Ya know, after thinking about this OP, you may want to just go meet her, or give her a big hello out the window.

She seems interesting, brave and a bit of a rebel.

Give it a try. You could be meeting a lifelong friend.

Or not. See what happens.

And report it here.

Most importantly, thank you for the video... you came through with your promise. I loved it.

Smooches, hugs and kisses.

Here's another of OP's Youtube video's. Is that you smoking in it OP? If so, me likey.

Have a small dinner party with the people in the building with the biggest mouths and/or her landlord. Wait for her to come out, and it's over.

I am sure it is a huge insurance violation for the building.

any gargoyle updates, OP?

No, no updates - it's been rainy and cold.

Thanks for the kind words, all. I'm glad she came out quickly enough for me to follow through with video. I'd feel weird taping her again, though, unless she's having a party out there or sits out there with a monkey or something. If anything odd does happen, I will try to record it... but I don't want to video-stalk her.

I'll also report back if/when I meet her or talk to her through the window.

[quote]Is that you smoking in it OP? If so, me likey.

No, that's not me. It's a guy who was in my first video editing class. He is cute though. I was behind the camera for all the videos posted on that account - except for my hand and voice in Fact of Life.

You went to a video editing class and you post that crap? I guess you dropped the 'how to frame and shoot videos in the dark' class.

(rolling eyes)R144, are you thick? OP couldn't very well plop the video camera on his window sill and direct her movements, could he? He was doing this--sshhhhh!--secretly!

Spectacular in every way, OP. The music is amazing. Just perfect.

That video made my Sunday!

Wow. I've been following this thread, and some of you got me laughing away with your comments.

But OP, that video is just so. Just so charming.

Wonderful!

OP? This is seriously my favourite DL thread right now. The video was a wonderful bonus. Keep up the good work!

Put a sign in your window that says "No smoking and No staring into my window."

You know, you can buy smoking gargoyles online. I wonder what she'd do if you bought one and put it on your windowsill.

Another version of a smoking gargoyle.

Too funny!

This thread is simply great. And I wonder what OP's real smoking gargoyle would do if she found out she is on You Tube. What a thought.

Have none of you noticed OP's other videos- particularly the Facts of Life video? He really is the creepy neighbor.

Genius thread. Your musical selection was perfect. Just the right balance of eeriness and whimsy. A few questions.

Is she wearing shoes or does she prefer barefeet?

Does she bring beverages or just smokey treats?

thanks and keep up the keen observations. this is fascinating to me.

This thread makes me want to climb out the window and smoke.

[quote]She seems interesting, brave and a bit of a rebel.

Clang! Clang! Clang! Frau alert at R139! Please calmly and quickly exit the building!

This is also my favorite thread right now. Also my favorite thread title, possibly ever. Keep us posted!

Okay, this is stupid and absolutely proves the point of whomever said I had no life, but: I was putting on a Nancy Sinatra LP I hadn't listened to in a while, and I found a sheet of Teletubbie static cling window decorations I stashed in the album jacket somewhen ago.

I noticed the Po static cling window decoration was in a familiar pose...

So I stuck Po in my living room window - the one my gargoyle neighbor stares at while she's perched outside smoking in almost exactly the same pose as Po's. Wonder what (if anything) she'll make of it.

awesome po!!

OP, I sincerely hope you plan to film a sequel -- My Neighbor is a Gargoyle II: Revenge of the Po!

That would be awesome.

the pic of Po is killing me over here! this is so awesome, OP!!

brilliant use of Po!!

Po-fect!

I have been ocasionally checking this thread but am now 100% following. Brilliant, OP.

LMAO @ Po!

Has Gargoyle seen it yet??

OP, your daytime shot of Po really does illustrate the danger of sitting on that window. I though she was perching on a wide window ledge/sill, but she's actually right out on the cladding/eaves (whatever they're called...).

Would it be overkill to draw a cigarette on Po?

It can't get any better.....

And then it does!

OP, you have to film Gargoyle II from the same angle you took the Po photo and include Po in the shot.

Pofection.

This is such a lovely thread.

Is the OP open to befriending the gargoyle?

I think it would be great if OP could get one of those telescoping poles. That way goodies, and stuff could be passed out the OP's window.

PO FTW!

OMG, this is a fabulous development!

Simply smashing!

Brilliant thread, made my day. Keep it going OP!

More please!

Am I the only one who finds it weird that OP knows the names of the various Teletubbies? As do many DL posters? Not to mention having Teletubby window dressing on hand, & a Nancy Sinatra LP....

r175, after Jerry Falwell declared Tinky-Winky (the purple Teletubby with the purse and the triangle antenna) to be gay, some gay people co-opted him as an unofficial gay symbol for a bit, so it does make sense that some of us still remember them.

Also, some of us spent a lot of time with kids who were very into the Teletubbies.

I remember that, Mermaid -- though I didn't pay attention to the little purple guy's name, & I never knew the names of his pals.

I'm all for a show of solidarity but I didn't realize that the Teletubbies had become gay icons. Judy, Barbra, Liza, Po....

Wonder if the gargoyle will get the significance of OP's window decal or if it will all be too subtle for her?

I saw this in a Doctor Who episode. DON'T BLINK. Don't even move. Get a friend to cover for you while you scope out obscure record stores. One of them will have a weird tape with David Tennant saying odd things. Play it, talk to it, and it will almost make sense. You'll nearly die, but you'll get to see the TARDIS!

God I miss that show. I don't get to see the new one with the new doc for some time, yet.

[quote]Wonder if the gargoyle will get the significance of OP's window decal or if it will all be too subtle for her? It won't be if he finds a Colorform cigarette to slap in Po's hand.

R178? Just passing through, continuing a conversation from another thread?

[quote]Just passing through, continuing a conversation from another thread?

Both, I guess. Time is a strange thing. Also there are thousands of messages and I thought maybe the Doctor Who threads had died down. Maybe I was wrong.

I miss that show!

I think you are wonderful OP. I have a feeling if The Gargoyle ever needs a helping hand (like when she finds herself hanging off of the rain gutter after a miscalculation) OP will be a good neighbor to have.

Two new Gargoyle sightings to report:

I saw the gargoyle sitting out there [italic]with a friend[/italic] yesterday evening. Both perched outside the window. So her friends are gargoyles too.

Today I was having a smoke in front of my house - on the ground, like a non-gargoyle (a goy-goyle?) - and I could hear her perched above me, singing. I didn't recognize the song, but it had a melancholy lesbian break-up sort of feel to it.

I'm keeping an audio recorder and my camcorder on my desk now, ready to go. If I hear her singing again, I'll try to catch a bit of audio to post.

NB - I just realized: I don't think I've ever heard her laugh. Maybe that's why she's been brought to me. So I can teach her how to laugh, like in Patch Adams.

Where do you and the gargoyle live?

Is her pal a woman or a man?

OP, with every post I love you even more. Viva la Gargoyle!

r175, I am right there with you.

oh my.

I'll pay you $5 if you get her to hold a kite while she's out there.

bump for gargoyle cams

OP, I love you. Just had to say it.

have you spoken to the Gargoyle yet OP?

I haven't spoken to her yet - but she does have a friend over today, a fellow gargoyle. Here's a picture. (I blurred the faces; gargoyle faces are not naturally blurry. If anything, their features are primitive and severe.)

A self-replicating Gargoyle!! Wow.

Look out, OP. If they're replicating you could end up with an entire Audacity of Gargoyles out there before you know it.

Hmm. The Gargoyle boy seems to have a receding hairline. Seems gothic to me.

I had a neighbor gargoyle problem when I was younger. They're rare but they still happen. At the tipping point, my cousin was staying with me in the city and the neighbor-gargoyle caught her eye and freaked her out so much that she ended up getting scared of NYC and leaving early.

I think the gargoyles are THE ONES WHO NEVER LEAVE.

Op, next time she is out there - hang your head out the window and tell her this:

"hey, that ledge isn't safe and if you fall - it's going to be gross and I don't want to deal with that."

Any new videos?

Gargoyle update please!

One of the gargoyle's friends, presumably another gargoyle, explained to her (while my recorder rolled) how the squirrels were eating away the inside of the ledge she perches on, rendering it quite dangerous.

You can listen - she clearly doesn't care. Probably because gargoyles can fly.

(They can fly, right?)

I just wanted to note that I know that last audio recording wasn't much of an exciting update, and if I could do better/quicker updates I would.

I will update anytime anything remotely interesting happens when it happens. Bit it's all on her schedule. I can't rush it.

I picture this thread building like a short story. Whether she falls off the roof and dies, or whether we become endless friends (or anything in-between) I don't know.

But I feel like this unseemly borderline-stalking could wind up building, step by step, an interesting capture of weird neighbor relationships, so I'm sticking to it.

I just can't promise a timetable.

You've given us enough, OP, even though it may be a chronicle of renter/homeowner carelessness/helplessness.

I've had those little homewrecking squirrels around before and fortunately, it hasn't had anyone falling to their deaths.

If you have any advice to give them, let it be "peanut butter traps."

Yikes! It really is Demona.

It looks like OP is going to be in for a long, fun summer!

pic or this thread is worthless.

r205, have you *read* the thread? There's been multiple pics, audio recording, hell there was even a video, complete with freaky soundtrack. Some amusing shit, I just hope that OP can resist being sucked into gargoyle ways, or at least has wi-fi that reaches out onto his window ledge.

Last night I heard two love-gargoyles perched in the usual place. They sounded a little drunk, so I ran the camera in case anything interesting happened.

The camera caught them going back inside. How do gargoyles climb through a window? Rather clumsily, it turns out.

thank you OP!

There's a marathon on Hallmark right now. I have a question: I'm watching the episode when Lucy gets a baby shower and I notices that as she's talking to Ricky and preparing for the girls coming over, she seems be unwrapping packs of cigarettes and putting them on various surfaces in the living room (as you would candy dishes for guests). Was this common?

I don't remember cigarettes being put out all around the room; however, I do remember sets being put out on the coffee table. There would be a box of cigarettes, an ashtray, and a lighter in a matching set.

The gargoyles are apparently watching "I Love Lucy" and posting on this thread.

"Gargirls??? You got some splainin' to doooo!"

.

Yes, 209, it was common. They had beautiful cigarette holders that you would put on side tables, etc., for guests. My mother had different sterling silver and porcelain ones. The coolest are the ones from the art deco period.

Despite the fact that my mother never smoked. Such a marvelous and thoughtful hostess.

Come on, we need an update from Gargoyleville! Where are you, OP?

I love this thread.

I love you r98

It would be so disturbing to have neighbors like this.

fortunately, my window-view neighbor is a hot Latino who fucks a lot of guys and shows off.

the Gargoyles are hipsters

What happened to Po?

Po's cooter is tired.

I just read through this thread and I want OP to keep posting here about the gargoyles.

Please!

The Gargoyle has been on vacation or something - no sight of even light for weeks from that apartment.

Seems like she's back today though. I've seen lights and heard a baby smoker's cough through the windows (everyone's are open now).

I'll update when I have something to post.

Stupid fucking gargoyle woke me up this morning. She had a friend out on her ledge and gargoyle talked and talked at her usual near-shouting volume. I guess she figures she can use her outside voice when she's on the ledge. Pissed me off, especially since I've been noticing her cigarette butts and small trash accumulating in our driveway. She just tosses stuff off the ledge like it goes into a trash barrel. DARKSIDED!! So I captured some audio from that Wife Swap episode with the woman screaming about gargoyles, burned it onto a CD, put that CD in a boom box and aimed it at her apartment. Volume: loud. Played it seven or eight times, but she didn't even pause in her yammering. I don't know if she looked annoyed - I haven't watched the videotape yet - but it sure freaked out my cat. Bitch better not make this a habit, or I'm going to install a strobe light out there.

Ah, the gargoyle lives. And annoys.

Can you post an audio of what you played her for us?

I can do you one better.

(Damn, I need a proper hobby.)

We almost lost the gargoyle thread forever!%0D %0D Please OP - I need a gargoyle update!

Can't wait to see how The Gargoyle observes the 4th of July. Maybe sitting out there and lighting cigarettes off her sparklers?

im so blind that i thought it read- Gaylord jajaja or is that the same thing?

bump%0D

Thanks for the bump R230; this thread had me in tears when it first started.

pics or it didnt happen

There's a pic in r192, and there used to be video, but I am not sure that is still up

video

plenty of pcs, r 232 or are you retarded?

I tip my hat to this classic thread. One of the few times in DL history that the OP has delivered the goods.

Wow, I thought this thread was lost in the April purge.

How old does she look OP?.

Gargoyle bump!

Love this thread - we need a gargoyle update!

Did the gargoyle eat the neighbor?

The gargoyle unfortunately died in a tragic fall from her perch. So as not to disappoint DL, OP has issued a casting call for experienced gargoyle impersonators. Final call-back is next week, then after an out of town opening and some script changes, My New Neighbor Is A Gargoyle will be back!

The gargoyle's baby voice would drive me nuts!

I wonder if she wouldn't have taken the apartment, were it not for the ledge. She couldn't pretend to be a non-smoker and then smoke - her neighbors would smell it.%0D %0D She must have looked at that ledge and said to herself, "I've found the PERFECT apartment."

Thanctuary!%0D %0D Thanctuary!

bump

bump for the gargoyle

I think Bristol Palin is the gargoyle.

Ledge bump.

Will the gargoyle decorate her windows for Xmas? Surely she did for Halloween?

Sorry,

But I'm getting the impression OP is the creepy one, filming some chick smoking cigarettes on her apartment ledge.

If it bothered OP so much, I think he would have done something about it other than running here to mince about it for the sake of a little anonymous attention.

OP, you're bizarre and need help. I also hope this girl finds out what you've done and beats the fuck out of you.

bump%0D

r251 you are completely missing the point and have no sense of humor at all.%0D %0D I'm curious as how the gargoyle is doing in the winter months.

R251 sounds like the anti c-word trolless.

oooooo, good point r253, the roof could get icy.....

R251 - You aren't a lesbian by any chance, are you?

R256, I think we all know the answer! Also R251, OP only captured the video at the insistence of DL. Have you even read this thread? I had completely forgotten gargoyle girl, but I'm glad this thread was bumped. I'd love to see a Gargoyle Christmas special!

Oh yes, we need a Gargoyle Christmas %0D %0D Poised on her very ledgeness%0D %0D Smoking on the rooftops%0D %0D Perching on precarios leaders!%0D %0D Oh yes, we need a little Christmas now!

Oh Lordy, the gargoyle didn't kill the OP did it?

R255, OP & the gargoyle live in San Francisco -- rain, fog, sometimes wind, but seldom ice.

Watching TV on the couch tonight, a sunbleached, wilted, curled up Po hit me on the shoulder...

Sorry, I thought I left an epilogue at R226, but I messed up the link. So here's what happened. I recorded the song from the link on a loop to a CD, and when my Gargoyle Neighbor went out to smoke one Saturday, I blasted it at her over and over via boombox, a sort of Waco approach. She stopped smoking on the ledge that very day. I feel a little bad, because I think she thought I was being anti-Semetic, but fuck her. I was being anti-Gargoyle.

R262 = OP = me.

Does anyone want to hear about the guy who splits the third floor with the Gargoyle, and how he makes a living shoving things up his ass?

(I should move to a different neighborhood.)

please share, r263/OP -- as if you had to ask!

Please r263!

yes, please tell

Bumping for an exciting new career!

The other side of the Gargoyle...

"I should bite my lip, let my big mouth sleep..."

He lives on the same floor as the Gargoyle, but on the side facing away from my house. He's nearly polite but very suspicious. He loves his dog and sock monkeys. And he makes at least part of his living doing porn.

How did I learn this? A search of Xtube for something. Forget if it was my city name, or "hard hats" or "piss" - but something brought his video still right to the first page and I recognized him as my 2nd of 3 weird neighbors.

I'm not judging him, but I've seen footage of his hole and so I call him Prolapse. Yep, Prolapse and Gargoyle, sharing one (divided) floor of an apartment. Then my house in the middle, and Junkie (the 3rd weird neighbor) and his "Mom" in the house on the other side.

And I'm not guessing about Prolapse's profession. He's on Xtube and Twitter and probably Facesplace and has his own site. I've thought about it a lot, and whereas I felt the need to shield the Gargoyle from possible recognition, I don't feel the same about Prolapse. He's kind of a public figure, I figure.

So, his site at the link.

But the thing about Prolapse is, while he seems very comfortable on the internet, in person he's kind of fidgety and weird.

He's part of our neighborhood crime watch group, which keeps a group board on Google. Of course, spam always slips through and we mostly ignore it, but here's how Prolapse reacted to spam he received (spam in italics, his response is bold):

[italic]To: prolapse Hey Bud I'm a 30 y/o mwm, 6'1, 190, 8i cut and thick, looking for oral.j/o, can also top or bottom if I find the right guy. I like to swallow. Just be clean and ddf as I am. If you are interested then we can talk at: www... PORNSPAM! .etc

It's not a BS site so no worries, I'm budwanker in there. Btw, I'm constantly flying all over the place so bear with me."[/italic]

[bold]What kind of group is this?? Ive had enough for today with this neighborhood and this just puts me over the edge. This is a crimewatch group and I receive a message like this?[/bold]

Can you really ever get hissy about receiving porn spam when you make a living sticking larger and larger things up your ass?

I wish I could report conversations, but half the time he doesn't return my neighborly hellos.

I did hear him last week on his phone, both of us smoking out back of our houses, advising his conversation partner to buy the Job Lot raisin bran because it was $1 a box and worked just as well as brand name.

I recommend his twitter feed, with gems like: "Too much snow? Come warm your hands in my HOLE." and "my mangina blocked?? oh no. the back door is always open.where were u trying to view from?"

OP I love you. I live in the suburbs with lame families surrounding me. I wish we could trade neighbors.

So do I, R271... :)

Your prolapsed neighbor is going to need a diaper full-time very soon. That is way too extreme and risky behavior. That video under the 'Hole' tab is pretty gross, in my opinion.

I too am in love with OP and his updates.

need a gargoyle bump

The gargoyle moved out today, without ever knowing that videos of her gargoyling picked up a thousand hits on YouTube. Heh.

I'll let you know if whoever replaces her fits into my menagerie of neighborhood freaks.

Poor gargoyle. Farewell thee.

Farewell, Gargoyle! You were a star and there will never be another like you. OP, thanks for giving us closure on this legendary chapter in DL history.

Wait there is video of the gargoyle?? Link please

The gargoyle is going to make a great April Fool! joke for the neighbors at her new place.

Link is at R81, or just search YouTube for Gargoyle Neighbor, 279.

This really has been a whole, complete adventure. A beginning, a middle and an%0D end. I've enjoyed it all.%0D %0D Let's toast to more interesting neighbors%0D for the DL denizen.

OP, thank you for the update! I love this thread. My neighbours are boring. Except for the crazy fucker who lives right next door who likes screaming to himself in the middle of the night. Not even remotely fun like the Gargoyle or Prolapse.

I am dense, so I really don't see what the problem is. Someone please explain.

What problem, R284? Living next door to a gargoyle isn't a problem -- as you can see from this thread, it's endless free entertainment in all weathers.

I don't think there's really a problem. It's more of an observation of an interesting phenomena that happens to be a smoker girl perched on the neighboring roof.

r284, the problem is the gargoyle is gone, and we are sad. (we also know that there could be far worse replacing the gargoyle, but we won't tell OP that)%0D %0D now, r284, if you are new to the thread, the problem at the beginning of the thread was the chick on the ledge next to the OPs window. It was crazy and creepy at the same time.

Crap!

I saw this bumped and thought there were new adventures.

Thank you for coming back and wrapping it up, OP.

Maybe someone would start a general crazy neighbour thread. We might find another gargoyle-level story.

[quote]Maybe someone would start a general crazy neighbour thread. %0D %0D I'd rather not see that happen since I'm the crazy neighbor.

WOW, OP. I thought I had insane neighbors. I live in a co-op with a fairly bizarre group of people, the longtime oldie cooperators of which many are now going into senile dementia, I saw "Hello", then they look as me as if I'm an alien! I've lived her 18 years, so they know me.

The new resident are ultra annoying hipsters and Yuppies who think they've discovered the wheel and there's also some other slacker weirdoes who inherited the apartments from their parents. They must have trust funds because they don't seem to work, not even at home.

Around Christmas time, there was an extremely strong smell of pot making it's way into everyone's living rooms on my floor, this happened every night after 11PM.

There's only three apartments per floor. The security guy actually rang everyone's bell to check for the pot. lol Isn't this illegal? I don't smoke anything, so I allowed them to check. Though the guy didn't come in, but he did smell the pot in all my floors living rooms, he was baffled.

I told him, "Ever since the hallway and bathroom vents were cleaned last year, I sometimes smell cigarette smoke in the bathroom and cooking odors in the living room. The pot smell does not necessarily have to be from this floor."

It appeared the heavy pot smoking must have been someone's guest over the Holidays, from an apartment on an upper or lower floor, because the pot smell was gone in two weeks.

bump

It seems like old times to have the Gargoyle thread back again. Now, all we're missing is a "Mame" thread.

Thanks to all the bumpers who kept this thread alive. Very funny stuff!

And it's awesome that OP's links are still valid, how often does THAT happen?

bump

That girl got a thousand hits on YouTube and she never even knew it. What hope can the rest of us have?

The neighbor is a ga-ga-ga-gargoyle!

I wish my new neighbor was a Gargoyle. It seems she is a frau and has lots of frauleins running amok.

Bump for historic thread!

bumb for posterity

Thanks for the bump 299

Thanks also for the bump. By the way, since I can't start a thread, besides opening the windows, what's the best way to get rid of pot and/or cigarette smells wafting from neighbors' apartments?

Bye Gargoyle, hello Prolapse.

[all posts by tedious troll]

[quote]what's the best way to get rid of pot smells wafting from neighbors' apartments?

phone 911

New to DL ....LOVED this ....laughed so hard ...

So happy to see this old gem bumped up in my tracked threads!

[all posts by tedious troll]

You do know this is an EST and that the OP admitted to making it all up and filming his friends, right?

Despite this it's probably the best bit of trolling we've ever had.

r308, when and where did that happen?

You're full of it, R308.

R308 is one of the trolls who can't stand to see anyone have a successful thread so they dump on everyone and everything.

[all posts by tedious troll]

Who cares if it's an EST? Still made me laugh ...As a newbie, Id love to see some of the other classics on par with this one ...possums in a drawer?

we need you on the first page!

This was an EST?! Nooo! I loved this thread. So sad now.

[quote]You do know this is an EST and that the OP admitted to making it all up and filming his friends, right?

Bullshit.

I'm the OP of this thread, and I didn't make this up and film friends, despite what some troll keeps insisting. It all happened as is written here.

I am glad this thread is still around and that people are still enjoying it.

[quote]You do know this is an EST and that the OP admitted to making it all up and filming his friends, right?

I think you’re confusing yourself with the short film OP made for editing class of a man smoking (outside his class building I think). When looking at Gargoyle videos he had uploaded to You Tube, people started noticing his school videos and asking if the hot cub man smoking in one of them was him. That’s when OP clarified that the smoker in that video was a friend of his – an issue totally unrelated to the Gargoyles.

I’m not looking for the post, but feel free to scroll back a half-dozen pages or so and you’ll find it.

Otherwise, the burden of proof about what you said (that OP admitted to an EST) is on you, and I, for one, won’t believe you until you find that entry or link.

Bump for newcomers

Awesome! I just referred to this thread the other day as a "Classic"!

(bumping so I can follow this tread even longer!)

Just reread this one after a mention in another thread. Good times, but I do rather hope OP has had better, less unsettling, luck in the neighbour department of late.

Love the video! As a landlord I think you should tell her landlord. I assume you know him and since he lives there it would be good for him to know. She's flicking ashes everywhere and that's a huge fire hazard and could affect his (and your) insurance. If she caused a fire and you knew about her activities which are now posted on you tube that's evidence I think but I'm not a lawyer.

Seriously. Not long ago two buildings burned near me bc someone was smoking in the fire escape and threw a butt that lighted a fire in the alley.

How could that guy rent to someone so creepy? Is your neighbor landlord creepy too?

Bump for a hilarious thread.

This is the first thread I read on Datalounge! glad to see it's back :)

bump

Could some kind soul please start a Giancarlo Esposito thread for me?

Love his acting and he's hot as fuck, esp. for a 60 yr old man.

If that's too specific, maybe a "hot character actor gossip" thread?

I always wondered why people like Gary Cole didn't have better careers.

Thanks

thanks for the tip! I need her for babysittin' Sweet Pea seein' as how I gots a date with a sailor man

You're all going to die down here.

*KISSES DOLL*

bump

Oh, I loved this thread! Now, I need to go find which page the video is on and re-watch.

I am stunned at the number of people that are apartment dwellers.

Thanks for the bump. I didn't know this one was still available.

God, I love this thread.

I know. This is one of my favorite threads ever.

The video is at r81 if you haven't seen it.

Where is the 'possum in the drawer' thread?

Somebody should start a thread about eccentrics they know/have seen around. There's so much about celebrities doing bizarre things but not enough about everyday wackos.

OP=sociopath. Of course he wants her to get hurt but can't be honest enough on an anonymous board. Right there, you know he's a nightmare people secretly wish to be gone.

[quote]Of course he wants her to get hurt

She's beyond hurt, r339. She died in a car crash more than a year ago but you already knew that.

[quote]Somebody should start a thread about eccentrics they know/have seen around.

Most of them are posting at DL.

This town needs more gargoyle.

And all gargoyle videos are deleted, thanks to a webmaster who let the site be overrun by freepers. Good job, asshole.

What are -- were? -- these gargoyle videos of which you speak, R343?

Hey qh.

This is the OP of the thread, many years later.

I feel bad that I got wound up by a troll and deleted the smoking gargoyle video from YouTube. I found it recently, so I'm reposting it now.

I live in a different house with different neighbor problems now, but none so visual...

Holy fuck! So glad I finally got to watch this. Thanks, OP!

Blast from the past...

One of the best DL threads of all time. I love you, OP!

This thread needs to be regularly bumped.

Is a dl thread from years ago !

Thanks for the bump! Classic

Some people LITERALLY have gargoyles outside their windows.

I'll bet her landlord told her he no longer allows smoking in the building. It's happening everywhere now and courts have been backing up the landlords.

bumping this just cause it's one of the most legendary threads in DL history

shards of glass and gorilla glue.

Posting in legendary thread.

Yay for Smoking Gargoyle Neighbor goodness!

Here is another classic DL thread, My Girlfriend is Pretending to be Possessed by a Demon:

You sound like a cigarette nazi OP.

Well this is an unexpected delight! I will look forward to re-reading over the weekend!

An oldie but a goodie!

Another glorious classic resurrected.

Does the Gargoyle look like this?

Put a strobe light in your living room window.

R14 made me google Marguerite Perrin and I’ve gone down the rabbit hole.

I'm loving this thread! I wish the YouTube video was still available though!

Does it move, or does it just sit there, pensively?

Note: Thread start date April 7, 2010.

Guys, don't ask questions and expect replies. Most of these old queens died years ago.

R367 - it is available. He reposted it at R346

Great video, but I still feel sorry for the gargoyle.

R369 This was revived because of yesterday's thread asking about the BEST of the DL threads. Some of them are hilarious -- it's great if they're given new life. Don't be such a downer...

OP had another video with the gargoyle and a friend of hers smoking in the daytime.