Oh, Florida. And I Don’t Mean Evans!
A man defecated on the floor of a restaurant in Fort Myers after breaking in early Saturday morning and stealing alcohol and other items.
The Fort Myers Police Department needs help identifying the suspect.
According to the FMPD, around 2:30 a.m. on Saturday, the suspect climbed through a small window at Joe’s Crab Shack on 2024 W. First Street in Fort Myers.
The suspect then stole various items including alcohol. And before leaving the suspect defecated on the floor of the restaurant before leaving the building.
| by Anonymous | reply 25 | January 22, 2023 9:58 PM
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[quote] A man defecated on the floor of a restaurant in Fort Myers
Sounds about right.
| by Anonymous | reply 1 | January 22, 2023 5:54 PM
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Wait... doesn't everybody shit on the floor after breaking and entering?
| by Anonymous | reply 3 | January 22, 2023 6:09 PM
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Anyone who eats at a Joe’s Crab Shack in Fort Myers deserves to be shit on!
| by Anonymous | reply 4 | January 22, 2023 6:10 PM
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The fecal evidence didn’t do much to narrow down the suspect list…turns out the person recently ate at Captain D’s Seafood and the Waffle House.
| by Anonymous | reply 5 | January 22, 2023 6:28 PM
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Does that mean he's left behind some DNA?
| by Anonymous | reply 6 | January 22, 2023 6:41 PM
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A strand of hair would have sufficed, r6.
| by Anonymous | reply 7 | January 22, 2023 6:43 PM
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That was his review. He's even shittier on Yelp.
| by Anonymous | reply 8 | January 22, 2023 6:43 PM
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Yes R6. He's an idiot. But anyone have size meat verificatia? Slow night here chez moi.
| by Anonymous | reply 9 | January 22, 2023 6:43 PM
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[quote] The fecal evidence didn’t do much to narrow down the suspect list
If the shit don’t hit, you must acquit.
| by Anonymous | reply 11 | January 22, 2023 7:02 PM
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Thought he shat during store hours! No story here.
| by Anonymous | reply 13 | January 22, 2023 7:22 PM
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We live in the greatest country in the world… where people SHIT ON THE FLOOR….
| by Anonymous | reply 14 | January 22, 2023 7:25 PM
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Flawduh, once Ponce de Leon's target in his quest for the Fountain of Youth, proves instead to be the Fountain of Feces
| by Anonymous | reply 15 | January 22, 2023 7:28 PM
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In one pic he is grabbing at his bulge, but you can't make out anything definite. Is he hispanic?
| by Anonymous | reply 18 | January 22, 2023 7:47 PM
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Where’s the video? I want to see the brown coming down!
| by Anonymous | reply 19 | January 22, 2023 8:00 PM
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They're not sending their best.
| by Anonymous | reply 20 | January 22, 2023 8:33 PM
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Passhing shtool at a shmart sheafood reshtaurant? SHAD!
| by Anonymous | reply 21 | January 22, 2023 8:37 PM
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He should have shit on the floor of the governor's mansion
| by Anonymous | reply 22 | January 22, 2023 8:47 PM
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Must have been an ex employee
| by Anonymous | reply 23 | January 22, 2023 8:53 PM
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PERMANENT SHITHOLE STATUS
| by Anonymous | reply 24 | January 22, 2023 9:12 PM
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