Ridiculous spellings of names that you have seen

Every child of a middle to lower class millennial or Gen Z girl.

Monique is a ridiculous name to begin with,

Zaakhari, instead of Zachary.

I have a cousin named Mollee.

Let’s add a random Y! Or a Lynne. Or double some letters for fun.

Porsche for Portia

Random Y's are really common with recent Cuban immigrants. Like "Yessica".

"Jerome" pronounced like "Jeremy"

I've seen Latino men with the name "Jhon".

Ye.

Jazmin instead of Jasmine. Albert of Monaco’s daughter with the Palm Springs realtor has that name. You can just tell her mother was trashy.

In this story, Zaakhari has a 3. named Drakaar.

Zakaree

Cbastian for Sebastian.

Quarlo for Carlo.

Stefonknee for Stephanie

R14, please tell me you're joking.

Tiffany but spelled Typhany

Maddysin, instead of Madison. Eboni, instead of Ebony. I'm sure i'll think of others.

Phlorence

Antwon, Franswa, Veroneek, Margareet

This school year’s worst spellings:

Jassmein pronounced Jasmine

Madasynne

Jhonathon

Vahgyna Kuhnt-Ann

Plissenta instead of Placenta.

Ne’veah

Colonel instead of Kernel

Euwniqe.

On the one hand I applaud people having unique names. There are too many Emmy/Emma/Emilys. But then you get 32 versions of D'Shonn.

Izziah for Isaiah

Danyel for Danielle

Khrystyne.

R20 made me laugh out loud.

Ed.win Mon.tan.ez.Jr.

Crystal spelled Krystle!

Jeramie for Jeremy

There’s a Facebook group called That Name is a Tragedeigh. It’s full of shocking horrors

Black women will often spell the name like they think it would be spelled. So you get Seh-Q'woiaih.

"Lizzo" for "Rotund"

Ranay

Sidni

Mikel

Mayri for Mary

If parents-to-be only knew that their mighty struggle to find a 'unique' name for their offspring is guaranteeing that any of their future job applications will go straight in the trash.

La'Kwonda, Sha'Niqua, DeWayne, Ebownee....buh-byeeeeeee.

Cynde for Cindy.

My cousin teaches in a very dodgy area and her theory is that any child with a Z or an X in their name will be trouble.

Kasie for Casey.

I once saw an HR list with someone named Shardinnae. Imagine your mother being that retarded.

Awkwafina.

My name was "Stuart". But my family referred to me as "THAT DUMB CUNT"!

Jeniphir

Jinger

My grandmother changed the spelling of my mother's name from Marjorie to Marguery.

I once knew a black African hooker named Angela who changed the spelling to Ahjala but still pronounced it as Angela.

Timothee wins the thread.

Airline

KathE

Willyam

Steefawn

AleeSha

Puritee

Names from my sister's third grade class roster in Carrie Coral.

D'arrin for Darrin.

More from the Tragediegh file:

Chuntera

Gaquan

Shuntraveious

Chelssie

Emmaleigh

Cydnei

Jayms

Marcanthonee.

And then people wonder why kids can't read. If they can't even spell their own name, they're doomed.

B4hb1 (Bobby)

There is an MLB player named Chone Figgins and his first name is pronounced as"Sean"

Someone in my family is named Shampayne.

And yet you repeat it r61?

Barbra.

MACCCA for McCartney

Ke$ha

Khuntfacé for cuntface

I just saw one on McMansion Hell. They were showing a kid's overdone bedroom and there on the wall in big block letters... "JAXSON"

I assume it's "Jackson" 🤔

Latinx

Filup for Phillip or Philip

^ Oh, that's easy, he was conceived in a gas station 😏

^ I was conceived in a Tesla, my name is Electra

I know a Sameul. Pronounced more or less the same way as the regular Samuel, which the vast majority of people think is his name. One way to avoid getting emails I suppose.

McKayla for Michaela. The ‘Son of Kayla’ weird spelling is ridiculous. I also always think of McRib or McNugget.

Duhfwahn

Alivia instead of Olivia

I also met a woman named Dristy instead of Kristy.

Barbruh

Bucket instead of BOUQUET!

Blanqu'ette

[quote] I also always think of McRib or McNugget.

The epitome of typing fat.

Alizabeth.

HHeather has two HH's.

Willowmena

I work with a Kalieb. Pronounced ‘Caleb’.

R67 Jaxson is ridiculous, but even worse to me is Jaxon or Jaxxon. So fucking stupid.

Jackson is okay. But plain old’ Jack is better.

Jaxson seems to be a name growing in popularity. Quite a few young men pop up when you google it.

Jaxsin is another variant I saw.

#44, I lurve Shardinnae *hiccup*!

Ptyphanie = Tiffany!!!

I do not know if this is a true story or a joke (or both) but someone I worked with years ago swore her mother (a schoolteacher) had a student who was a female twin. Her name was Shanika. Her twin sister was named Nashanika...because she was not Shanika (?) I guess that was the logic.

Tay-Lah

Shawn for Sean

Stefonknee

Stephnie Weir's spelling is so stupid. Loved her MadTV though.

Porsha.

Atheists who name their son Christian but spell it Xian.

Johneen.

Headline on the Daily Mail today: "Cardi B feels 'hopeless trying to make Offset happy' after the tragic shooting death of his cousin Takeoff at age 28"

[Quote]Alizabeth

I've seen it as "Ahlizabeth."

Jakoubie

Ky-Lee

Not a weird spelling, but I live in Miami and there is an older, woman Uber driver (I think Cuban) that I've gotten a few times whose name is Lesbia (which sounds like a DL cover name to me).

I actually have a white trash client named "Char-lee."

Trump for Traitor.

Myke for Mike. I think people just can’t spell anymore. Teachers, do better.

🤔 Ye for Kayne

I used to work with birth data and records reported when babies were born. About 50,000 per year. Names were one of my fun pursuits, and I'd publish news reports every year on popular baby names.

Favorites?

"Zhan Luke," way back when "Star Trek: The Next Generation" was first on repeats.

"Fuc," a girl whose parents were Vietnamese immigrants. The hospital staff tried to explain the problems being made but they kept the name.

"Beyondsay." I don't need to add anything here, do I?

BUT ISN’T MY NAME CUTER THAN YOURS?!

— Timotheeee Chalamalabadamet

Anfernee

My friend and his wife named their son, Micheal instead of Michael because they thought it was “cool.”

Mykal is another way people are spelling Michael.

With all these ridiculous spellings, why hasn't anyone mentioned the exhaustion and frustration the kids endure after having to constantly SPELL these names every time someone asks them for it.

It's borderline cruelty.

Bailey Baileigh Bailee Baili

Jorja.

Kristine

Faythe, Charitee, Jizzabel

r104 he likens it to being akin to Yahweh rather than Kanye.

r109 Mykal could pass off into a traditional spelling that sounds akin to... it's popularized spelling in many regions, though I've mostly seen it used among eastern europeans in english speaking nations. The tropes of using phonetics for anglicisation.

gaelic names are the fun one, though. . . and of course, a few decades ago when english names became popular in non-english speaking nations where there were many a child named Pepsi

R116 in the same vein, when I was living in Hong Kong I knew two Fendi Wongs - back when Fendi was a fashionable label.

O’cean, pronounced “Oh-she-arn”.

I went to school with a kid named Sean, pronounced Shane. And yes, he was correcting people 10x a day.

Isreal

Leave me out….

Ayiiia from Real World Cancun (she was a real cunt too)

How can any of these people be executives or CEOs? It’s really limiting them when you give them these names.

I have a great-nephew and his name is KOLTEN.

If you look up "White Trash" in the dictionary you will see a picture of his mother and her heavily tattooed hands and arms.

Why do parents complicate their children's lives? They'll go through life, to clarify the spelling, of their first names.

I took a delivery to someone named "Continuous"

M'Lynn and Ouiser

Sade for Shardae.

My co-worker just named her new baby son Jrue. Don't know if that's supposed to be a variant of Drew or what.

R129, your co-worker is a moron.

That guy from Baywatch, Jaason.

Azzhole

Parents don't realize "unique" spellings put a curse on their kids. They always have to correct or explain their names. A woman on "The People's Court" sued because her daughter's was spelled wrong on a birthday cake, She lost. So sad, too bad, honey.

R123 for real. My mom always told my brother and I to give our kids names that would fit a bank executive, for example. I’m never having kids (my choice) but my brother has two and thankfully followed her advice and gave them normal names spelled the normal way.

CEOs named Jaxxin, Braedyn, Jazzmyn, or Xzavier look silly.

My coworker has a kid named Jacyn. It’s pronounced Jason. My eyes nearly fell out of my head I rolled them so hard when I heard that. Poor kid is always going to be spelling his name for people.

The mom of a local New York television reporter must've liked a name by it's sound, so spelled it the way she heard it - Antwan. Wonder how long it took Mrs. Lewis to find out the correct spelling?

Parents who didn't think their kids wouldn't have much to look forward to, gave them unique spellings as their only claim to fame.

Kunt Phalp

^^Phlap

Valorie or Vallory

Condoleezza.

Jorgie or Gorgy for Georgie.

Carsandera for Cassandra

Airwrecka

Will.I.am

Aaron for AyAyRon

Some kids might want privacy and not be easily Googleable. With a unique name they are easily found in a search. I’m so glad I have a common name and people can’t Google me.

I knew someone who named their kid Bumboolaybay. It’s spelled Bumblebee.

Melania, as silly spelling of "Cunt Face"

Trae instead of Trey

Hooleeyah for Julia

Meghan for Rachel

All of this reminds me of a 30 Rock episode where Tina Fey is at the post office talking to a black postal worker. She looks at the worker's nametag and calls her "Trenée." The worker looks at Fey and says, "Irene."

Debonnaire