Woke Barbie

looks like an outdated bluetooth ear piece.

I can see why you called this woke... it's just sheer laziness.

Hansen's disease Barbie - comes with a Norplant, an IUD, and a bottle of Thalidomide.

THE HORROR!!!!!

Are you ok, OP?

Waiting for the inevitable Trans Barbie/Ken doll with snap-on penis/vulva, tits/binder, makeup/beard, pronoun pins, green hair, ugly clothes etc.

We’ve had neutered Ken for decades.

Barbie also counts spoons to get through the day, and has a prescription of anti-psychotics to keep her Morgellon's at bay.

Still no morbidly obese scooter Barbie.

Where is Bottom Surgery Barbie?

Well from this picture it looks like there's also Michael Jackson skin bleaching disease Ken, know it all lesbian/Debby Downer, turned late in life Born again christian, prosthetic Barbie, wheelchair Barbie. The first one is obviously FTM trans and the third one is obese SJW Barbie.

^Technologically Challenged Barbie

How many deaf children are there that are going to want this? lol

The right-wing is just angry that there is no Karen or Dee Plorable Barbie doll. They want to be represented, too. They want some love from Mattel.

Hope this picture from another site works, showing Barbie's all inclusive dolls

IDGAF it’s not hurting anyone.

I think at this stage, Mattel should consider releasing an exclusive 3-D Printer where kids can design and print their own dolls and action figures and also sell exclusive filament material.

I usually am pro feminist, but they really screwed us with this. An entire generation of girls and gays are going to miss out on having aesthetically pleasing Barbie and Ken dolls. When I was 4 I stole my sister's Palm Beach Skipper (2001). She didn't care because she only wanted Palm Beach Barbie and Ken. Anyways, Skipper was my bff till I turned 7, but I still have her to this day. I'm not an adult collector, cause it's sorta weird, but I still keep Skipper and have fond memories of taking her to the "beach" and playing with her when my parents weren't looking. It's weird that I had to feel ashamed and hide that I played with a doll at the age of 5 .

^Get back to work, Smithers

r12 They had the VeggieTales. Larry the Cucumber remains quite popular to this day.

r16 Sandra Bernhard once spoke of being surrounded by a group of angry feminists because she wore a skirt to an event. They screamed at her "Don't you know what you're doing to the feminist movement!?!" to which she replied "Hopefully feminizing it."

r14 They hobbled both the Latina barbies so they couldn't run from immigration.

Woke me up when they make a vibrating Parkinson's Barbie that comes with a glass of milk with half of it spilling out.

What accessories does prosthetic leg Barbie come with?

They need to give her a snatch already. It just ain’t right!

Woke! Woke! Woke! Woke! Woke! Woke! Woke! Woke! Woke! Woke! Woke! Woke! Woke! Woke! Woke! Woke! Woke! Woke!

R19 And it's such toxic and stereotypical feminine behavior to criticize another woman for her clothes or appearance. Feminist activists can be so hypocritical because they actually think they have the right to police and control other women's behavior and thoughts. Men mind their own business and focus on their ambitions.

WTF! A few years back Barbie was losing shelf space and briefly was no longer the top selling doll brand. Mattel embraced inclusiveness and Barbie is back in a big way. Why should it bother you if Barbie wears has vitaligo, sits in a wheelchair or is bald. Find the one you relate to and be happy. I do not understand why gay people have a problem with a group that supports us!

When does Amputee Jem hit the shelves?

r25 There's also a great bit from "Joan of Arcadia" where the nerdy brother goes to look for his rebel girlfriend that looks like a babydyke at anti-capitalist meeting... but every time he thinks he's found her, it turns out to be another girl. They get paranoid thinking he's there to harass and he tries to explain it, they get angrier because he's basically accused them of being conformists and wearing a uniform. And the only way he's able to escape is buy burning his new sneakers.

It's pretty easy to make any Barbie or Ken doll an amputee if you want to.

I am eagerly awaiting Down syndrome Barbie.

Dalmatian Ken is definitely getting the bbc from BlacKen

As a Barbie collector, Barbie lost her charm/quality in 2015, now the dolls are just boring with cheap printed buttons and pockets, bad hair quality and horrible sense of fashion.

R32 = Trixie Mattel

The Fashionista line is cancerous.

Fat Barbie is a SIN

I mean, I guess how are you supposed to play with her if she can’t hear you?

Where's phalloplasty "Ken"?

R31 No they scissor their mounds against each other

r35

r35 or with a sharp object

Trailer trash barbie

Does Mattel still have the super exclusive Barbie Collector's Club where they sell limited editions of high fashion Barbies? I had a Barbie doll collecting phase where I was collecting those, like the Mattel Barbie Faberge Imperial Splendor Porcelain Doll.

Barbie must only be the perfect white blond woman or else it’s woke!!!!

R26 Barbie was doing fine for years, and then feminist journalists claimed that Barbie's not only sexualized little girls but they also gave them eating disorders. Enough bad press, and surprise surprise, women are afraid of buying dolls for their daughters. The big sellers now are the LOL dolls. They have unrealistic body proportions, they wear pasties, lingerie, and very revealing clothes, and they have eyes that would make the powerpuff girls wince in disgust. I'd rather have my child play with a 2000 Barbie doll rather than a 2020 LOL doll. Barbie is now a superficial object parents use to virtue signal to other parents, and the actual quality of the toy -- mold, hair, aesthetics and clothing is a cheap afterthought. I love multicultural barbie dolls btw. It would be more interesting if children could learn more about world cultures through Barbies that wore sarees, burqas, and kilts. But I'm against making Barbies that look like random people off the street with no actual fashion. And it's crazy that they are using disabilities like lost limbs and vitiligo as accessories. It's like when Victoria Secret came out with a down syndrome model, it just looks wrong and it makes me upset.

r42 Diversity must be superficially represented with barbie in blackface while treating disability like a fashion accessory and toys. Will wheelchair barbie be like betsy wetsy but only with colostomy bag? She turns water to shit and carries around with her. What fun!

R42 Barbie has been multicultural for a LONG time, that's not what this is about. Christie, Nikki, Teresa, Kayla etc, have existed for a long while.

Of course now they'll come with missing eyes, bottles of anti depression medication and Ritalin and bruises for those children who are abused and sexually molested. They'll come with cars that you can tie up the dolls in and drop them in the bathtub for children who might grow up to emulate Susan Smith.

r45 It's the go to trolling for either side.

They'll defend superficial diversity because representation is more important than substance... 1000s different variations of the same model that reduces diversity to a cliche, stereotype or costume. The same kind of shit they protest on Halloween but yet want year around. It's like if they had a Native American Barbie up there, you know she would be either be decked out in stereotypical regalia or it would be so benign she was only represented by title.

The other side will cross the line into trolling because it's an empty battle.. so, taking it to the most absurd and surrealist extremes is really all there is.

I'm waiting for a Ken doll that has nipples. You'll be able to color them and scribble a hairy chest with an erasable pen. You can add a bush (or not) above snap-on penises (one uncut, one thick, one long, and an erect one). Snap on balls, too. I want a man 12 inches tall that I can play with, too.

The next Barbie will be a Roma. Coming with its own Italian subway station.

Every kid gets a trophy. I mean, a Barbie.

Expect a generation of nightmares.

"Dear Gwan, I kno its erly but can Santa plez bring me Mailaboo Montecito Princess Barbie for xmas? Plz don't tell Louis or hell stel it from me. XXX Princess Charlotte."

Call it woke or inclusiveness but a Barbie in a wheelchair doesn’t bother me. I do however wonder what the etiquette is around them. I knew a woman on Facebook a few years ago and she posted that her white daughter’s favorite doll was black and it became a shitshow with everyone calling each other racist. So can anybody own a handicap Barbie or do people think only the people represented by these dolls show own them?

r49 Roma Barbie comes with a wagon and hand held baby carrier

Baby not included.

Pregnant Barbie comes with your choice of a knitting needle or removable baby and a meager welfare check.

baby daddy not included.

Wrong thread. !

Suicidal Barbie comes with a can of Drano.

Priestly Ken comes with an altar boy and rosary chains of oppression.

Weekly Tithe required.

Oppressed Barbie run her under the water and like magic she's smeared in her own period blood and her very own magic protest sign, so the fun times will never end because everyday is a new protest!

Requires daily tiktok uploads or Xe'll implode.

Why couldn’t the hearing aids and wheelchair be accessories for the Barbie you already have?

“BATH ID HAHD!”

How about a doll that reflects homogeneity and exclusion.

I'd agree with you, OP, if this doll were heavy set, had dyed blue buzz cut, an attachable penis, tattoos of their pronouns, and a fake social media account painfully detailing all of its mental illnesses, but it doesn't. It's just a hearing aide. Let's calm down.

I think that covers it R60

And this

Surprisingly this isn't the stupidest thread posted on DL today. It's up there though.

R62 and R63 your dolls are both TOP DRAWER

They have been doing these for years now. For childrens things it’s ok to be "woke" it’s just dolls

R64

Acknowledging that some people are different is a good thing. Only Republicans like OP sneer at things for being "woke"

No alopecia Barbie?

R67, maybe you could stop making a huge fuss over a doll for little girls.

[quote] Mattel embraced inclusiveness and Barbie is back in a big way.

Proving yet again that it's got nothing to do with socially inculcating "inclusiveness" and everything to do with profit.

R41, Mattel is a business so yes it is about profit but it is also about giving customers what they want. Barbie now had three different heights and different body builds. One of which is “thick”.

R43, Tweens described the traditional hourglass shaped Barbie as fat.

"I mean, I guess how are you supposed to play with her if she can’t hear you?"

Sign language, Rose.

[quote]I usually am pro feminist, but they really screwed us with this. An entire generation of girls and gays are going to miss out on having aesthetically pleasing Barbie and Ken dolls.

I can't imagine any of the real people on DL would fall for this. I guess your pals from whatever hole you crawled out of think this is the height of rhetorical excellence, but in reality, it's so dumb it's nearly a word salad.

I should have known that the anti-transers were so low that they'd practically slit their wrists over a doll made so little girls with hearing problems could feel included. It's a new low, but I'm sure you've got lots more lows to hit on your way down.

At the Barbie convention I saw a tee shirt that read "I survived cock ring Ken".

Where’s the non-binary fire truck with a hearing aid for little humans experiencing hearing loss who do not support patriarchal binary gender roles?

Why is this so threatening to you?

The bigger question, R77, is WHY ISN’T THIS THREATENING TO YOU!!!!???

I love blonde afro Barbie. Her hair is glorious.

My dream is a Spaz Ken that dribbles when you squeeze him.

But let's hope Mattel does a line of these too...

Grindr Ken, where when you open the box, he looks twenty years older than the picture on the box.

Just think of the playroom to be had with Nazi Kens rounding up the Diversity and Fuck-up Barbis for Resettlement!

You'd never go out!

This reminds me of visiting the apartment of a guy who had some Barbis amongst a shitload of other opshop crap. He had to go out in a hurry so we wrote Barbi a teeny weeny suicide note about discovering Ken liked cock, and then made a cute little noose of string, and strung a Barbi up for him to find on return.

Why so worked up over a deaf Barbie for little deaf girls? Some of you are just fucking insane.

Why are only the black Barbies fat and handicapped? And aren't dolls about fantasy? Does some little kid really want vitiligo Barbie?

Where's Cleft Palate Barbie?

NaziLounge thread

Ew I'd want my Barbies to be pretty. Not ugly or handicapped.

[quote] The right-wing is just angry that there is no Karen or Dee Plorable Barbie doll. They want to be represented, too. They want some love from Mattel.

Insurrection Barbie and Ken. Comes with little bags of 💩 to smear on walls and a coupon for a free AR-15 from Walmart.

Lighten the fuck up r84.

That was light, R89.

You don’t belong on this board.

[quote] You don’t belong on this board.

Why, because I think some people are having a crazy over-reaction to an utterly harmless child's toy just so they can post anti-woke nonsense in yet another thread?

WOKE=WHINE

[quote]Why, because I think some people are having a crazy over-reaction

Yes, you don't belong here you idiotic frau, because you think people are taking it seriously, rather than merely taking the piss.

Of course anyone who disagrees with you is automatically a woman.

/massive eye roll

Yeah, but you ARE, bitch!

[quote] Some of you are just fucking insane.

Or maybe it's just R96.

[quote]Lighten the fuck up [R84].

This entire thread is nothing but assholes like you mocking disabled people and shitting all over the idea of the most tepid form of diversity. Fuck off.

R16: Megan McArdle wore out that I'm a ...... kind of trope ages ago. Adding an earpiece is a cheap addition. Barbie has had Black friends, Latina friends and various spinoffs over the years. This Rightwing outrage trolling is a bit tiresome.

R85 They will do great with the wannabe SJW try-hards who flooded Tumblr when it used to be popular and The Sims community eats things like this stuff up.

When I was a kid, my sister had the Barbie car and several Barbies, one of which had a loose head which fell off easily. The only "playing with Barbies" I ever did was to put that one in the car, push it toward the wall and watch it hit the wall and the Barbie's head fly off. It was many years later that I discovered that as young gayling I had invented the Jayne Mansfield Barbie.

[quote] This entire thread is nothing but assholes like you mocking disabled people and shitting all over the idea of the most tepid form of diversity. Fuck off.

Lol. Lighten the fuck up or get off the fucking site. It’s obviously not for you.

When I think of Barbi I always think of that great story about the teenager who gets his rocks off by pulling off the head of a Barbi and cumming in it. Can't remember the author. Christopher St mag used to publish her stories.

Apparently Deaf people are the new “trans” when it comes to hysterical, apocalyptic right-wing attacks. Can’t wait til they start bashing those stupid lazy sightless blind people, with their woke canes and special tax exemptions! I HATE THEM!

But R104, "this site isn't for you." It's only for nazis and the nazi-adjacent to bash disabled people and make fun of diversity in any form.

This "gay" website.

Big Mandy has got there before you R104

[quote] But [R104], "this site isn't for you." It's only for nazis and the nazi-adjacent to bash disabled people and make fun of diversity in any form.

Yet, here you are.

The hall monitor fraus like be titillated. Their withered ovaries clatter like castanets while furiously typing 'sick, sick, sick'.

I want a Squamous Cell Ken doll like me! He comes with a port inserted in his chest for radio sensitiving meds, and removable squamous cell to place where needed. Give it to me!

Where's the Barbie with a ten inch schlong?

Barbie Karen Carpenter

I think she should come with an ear horn to really piss people off.

And why not make fun of 'woke Barbie?' DL has suddenly become a beacon of serious discussions on the social ramifications of toys? I'm waiting for Ugly Barbie for those unfortunate children who were born with big noses and ears.

Little kids see dolls as toys. They don't look up to a plaything. Parents put these ideas into their head. Parents sexualize Barbie and Bratz and such, not kids who just see them as cute things to play pretend with. Hell, many girls like to torture their Barbies or pretend their dinosaurs or aliens.

Because, r113, there's a lot of loud, weenie power-hungry scolds who like the fact that they can bully people into submission through name-calling and harassment and get praised for it. They can't get away with it in other aspects of their life, so they spend their time finding things to be faux-offended over that they can use to unleash all their worst impulses on random people.

I love it! Good for Mattel.

Bratz were and are superior to Barbie.

Scolds = people NOT complaining about a doll for little girls?

Not Scolds = people complaining for100+ posts about a doll for little girls?

Will there be a ventilator dependent quadriplegic Barbie with detachable trach?

r119 Why not?

Mattel has been trying to tamp down them tig bitties forever.

Lol dummy OP doesn't even know what woke means. How embarrassing for her.

Ken and Barbie already have severe disabilities, obviously. Or are people just going to pretend that Ken isn't missing a few items, and Barbie has no nips?

R122 actually he's using it correctly.

[quote]as part of its ongoing efforts towards diversity and inclusion.

Barbie should be slender, blonde. blue-eyed, beautiful and elegant.

If others want representation, they can buy the cheap knockoffs at Dollar General or the many other generic fashion dolls on the market

LEAVE BARBIE ALONE! She's blonde, she's beautiful, she's everything you will never be!

Crazy person alert!

"Not Registered to Vote Barbie" comes with her own wire hanger and sack of complaints!

[quote]Where's the Barbie with a ten inch schlong?

You mean "Stunning & Brave Barbie"!!!

As a child, I thought the original Barbie was made in Japan because of the improbably tiny feet and slanted eyes. I assumed the huge bust and miniscule hip and waist conveyed a satiric view of American womenhood in the 50s.

r74 Anyways the whole point of dolls and other figure toys is escapism. None of my dolls looked like me, and that was never a desire nor thought that came into my brain. I was a little boy and I didn't have abs like the ken doll. I didn't have abs like my batman and superman action figures. I didn't even play with Ken 99% of the time. There is a psychology to doll play, and some people don't get it. Girls with hearing aids can tell they are different from all the other girls. A doll with hearing aids will not change the feeling of being different. Lots of kids have things that make them feel different and isolated, and learning to deal with that, with assistance from parents, is an important life skill. Girls with disabilities are just like other girls, and the doll that they want is what all the other girls want, a beautiful doll that they can roleplay with. They can feel like a pop star, a model, a mermaid, or a princess. Vitiligo Ken and Prosthetic Leg Barbie is corporate virtue signaling at it's best. Action figures have been pretty safe from these types of changes--- you can't make Batman fat and short. It would be ridiculous if they made a special education bus Lego set, with the stated intention "to let children with developmental disabilities see themselves". Guys they just want to build a rocket or a fire truck like the other kids.

Burkha Barbie.

(too soon? too early?)

R130 or you could let little kids enjoy toys that reflect their lives a tiny bit more.

I want a Barbie with an iron lung. Lobotomy Barbie, electroshock Barbie. I had to use my imagination when I was young, but it would be nice to see these ideas manifested in mass produced plastic. I'd buy the shit out of them. I'd elbow 8 year olds out of the way to buy them and I've got more disposable income, Mattel. The Sanitarium Barbie collection would shatter sales records worldwide.

R131 She has been made for girls in the middle east for the past couple decades or so. I genuinely think it would be a great addition for them to do a Barbie's All Around the World series instead of the disability stuff. This edition would be more culturally authentic and sensitive compared to other collections done in the past. Kids could learn about global fashion and other ways of life through the dolls. They could come with plastic dishes of signature dishes from their countries for example, so Saudi Arabian Barbie could come with the burqa as well as a plastic dish of Khuzi. Then an Indian doll with a saree and a dish of paneer makhani.

The Cast Of The View Barbie

Joy Behar Barbie, the New York loudmouth liberal Yenta. Whoopi Goldberg, the androgynous, is it a he, is it a she, lesbian. Megan McCain and Elizabeth Hasselback are already pretty well represented with the original Barbie. Throw in the rest of the dogs and there's the spectrum.

[quote] How many deaf children are there that are going to want this?

An old college friend now has a 20 year old daughter who has profound hearing loss and has worn hearing aids since she was 10. She would have absolutely loved a Barbie like this.

Why does OP have an issue with that?

[quote] It's pretty easy to make any Barbie or Ken doll an amputee if you want to.

Mine were usually headless.

How about Fetal Alcohol Syndrome Barbie?

[quote] Why so worked up over a deaf Barbie for little deaf girls?

I'm pretty confident any Barbie the child might choose was already deaf. The molds never included eardrums

Cutter Barbie with her own razor; Bulemic Barbie; IBS Ken; Zit-squeezing Skipper; Speaking-in-tongues Barbie; Toe fungus Ken.

Isn’t the hearing AIDS supposed to go over the ear?

An overturned-Roe-v-Wade Backyard Abortion Barbi that came with a wire coat hanger and a pair of long pliars would be both cute AND instructive!

Bareback Barbi and Ken, like Bareback Moe, is an absolute must.

They’ve decided there’s actually a legitimate market for this or is this just to get the PR points of virtue signalling? What kid wants disabled dolls? Even if they themselves are disabled you’d think they would rather have the regular ‘aspirational’ type everyone else plays with.

It seriously is only a matter of time until we get trans Barbie . It’ll actually be a hybrid of the Ken doll with Barbie’s hair and makeup and will come complete with razors for shaving, hormone meds and compression underpants to hide the “lady cock”.

Transphobes have to spew their shit in every thread.

We had wire coat hanger Barbie a while back.

The posters whining about everything being so woke are the biggest snowflake pussies ever.

Picking on toys for girls or attacking a little black girl for getting cast to play a character who is white in the Percy Jackson books. Cowards and pussies.

R148 Agreed. I don't know why any grown adult should give a fuck about this. I can see why some think it's silly and pandering but the ones here going all out on "woke" culture and ranting sound like MAGAt trolls. Little kids don't care about this.

R53 The wheels will prove too tempting for Madison-uh-I mean Ken.

[quote]Lighten the fuck up or get off the fucking site. It’s obviously not for you.

I'm tired of the babies like this guy who stomp their widdle feet and demand people LEAVE IMMEDIATELY, just because they can't take criticism.

Almost no one on DL who dishes it out can take it anymore. It's pathetic.

Real DLers know how to deal with assholes and trolls, it involves a good kick in the cuntbone and grease fire.

The similarity between Meghan McCain and Barbie stops at hair color. Meghan is as big as Barbie's Dream House.

[post redacted because linking to dailymail.co.uk clearly indicates that the poster is either a troll or an idiot (probably both, honestly.) Our advice is that you just ignore this poster but whatever you do, don't click on any link to this putrid rag.]

^ the problem with what Allyn W. is saying - reducing the stigma around pedophiles (now rebranded to "MAPs" or Minor Attracted Person) so they can feel comfortable getting treatment - is that many think that it will lead to relaxing societal views on pedophilia being a crime, and will lead to pedophiles being able to play the victim card "I can't help it!" which will result in them being given more chances and more leeway which means they will have more ability to slip up and relapse - however in this case relapse means molesting a child which can scar someone for life!

I can see her point in providing a safer, nonjudgmental zone so that they can get treatment and won't be as afraid to admit it, BUT I also can see how having pedophiles being able to play the victim card like everyone else nowadays could be a problem.

Pro-Life Barbie! She comes with a rusty bloody hanger!

When will there be a Barbie of Color with alopecia!

Whoever repainted this Barbie is an artiste!

r158 pic looks like Beyonbie

Heresy R159. That Barbie is a work of art.

Pic of any Barbie + FaceApp

Will we soon see a trans Barbie with a smooth bulge like Ken's?

The Doctor Who trans WOKE Rose Tyler train wreck Barbie

How about a Colostomy Ken?

Triggered much, r163?

Oops I shit my pants Barbie

Cool cool, but when will Mattel release Convict Ken (with requisite prison tatts) and Excessive Piercings Skipper (made with real metal)?

Fuck that. We need Barbie with the aids or flesh eating disease.

For r168

Mattel announced Ken's friend Khalil will be released this fall. The Foot Locker Smash N Grab Playset will be sold separately.