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Tips on getting sober

I am a regular drinker (and pot smoker) who wants to give both up. What are some of your success stories for getting sober for those here who have?

by Anonymousreply 102January 20, 2022 1:54 AM

Trade one habit for another for a while - gum, caffeine. Etc.

by Anonymousreply 1January 17, 2022 1:22 PM

The first three weeks are the worst. Focus on getting through those no matter what. Get plenty of fresh air. Change up your routine. Don't have any of either in the house.

by Anonymousreply 2January 17, 2022 1:25 PM

I guess it depends on the depth of your habit, but yeah, they say three weeks to build a new one. Now that I'm older, I can't drink the way I used to (and would like to, honestly). I find eating dinner early, at cocktail hour, kills the urge. And lately - this will sound silly I know - every day I don't drink, I put a little sticker in my datebook (yes I use an old-fashioned paper book). I use the free stickers charities send when you donate. It's oddly satisfying to track. Yesterday I'd logged 10 sober days, so I treated myself to two martinis with a steak dinner, another indulgence. Sunday evening seems like a good day for a treat, since one has to pull it together on Monday. I thoroughly enjoyed it all. Back on the wagon now. Good luck!

by Anonymousreply 3January 17, 2022 1:31 PM

I gave up drinking eleven years ago this May. I was drinking about two bottles of wine a day by the time I quit. Although I wasn't physically dependent, that fear was always in the back of my mind. (I had a grandfather die of cirrhosis of the liver.)

The last time I drank, I also took Adderall. I felt like shit the next day, per usual. Complete self-loathing and out of control. I'm not sure why that time was the last time -- I hadn't planned to quit -- but I just looked in the mirror and said, "You need to stop doing this." I also noticed around this time that heavy drinking was making my anxiety much worse. I'm fucked up enough as it is -- bipolar disorder -- and I don't need alcohol to exacerbate my already-shitty mental health.

I substituted an interest in jazz with drinking for the first few months. I read about it, listened to it, and experienced it in a way I never had previously. Also, I made other major changes in my life. I applied to grad school. I planned a cross-country move. I quit smoking, lost weight, and became a vegetarian. I ended some unhealthy friendships.

I guess my advice, then, is to make other changes in your life too. I think if you view drinking as an isolated behavior, then it's harder to make quitting stick. Drinking affects everything, so change other things as well. Eventually drinking will seem like a relic from another period in your life.

I know everyone's experience is different. But this approach worked for me.

by Anonymousreply 4January 17, 2022 1:50 PM

Enjoy not drinking. Begin a daily aerobic activity. You'll notice the difference and appreciate it.

by Anonymousreply 5January 17, 2022 1:53 PM

Study philosophy. Learn to better gauge yourself with the world around you and your physical self with your anima.

by Anonymousreply 6January 17, 2022 2:00 PM

I mentioned this a few weeks ago, I had a total klutz moment trying to run to my truck because it was freezing cold outside, and face planted giving myself two black eyes. I haven't left my house in weeks now (that includes trips to buy booze).

Enjoy all the money you're saving. Seriously.

by Anonymousreply 7January 17, 2022 2:07 PM

slapping faces viciously

by Anonymousreply 8January 17, 2022 2:12 PM

Stop drinking.

by Anonymousreply 9January 17, 2022 2:12 PM

Watch Lindsey Graham on Hannity.

by Anonymousreply 10January 17, 2022 2:18 PM

I still have no clue. I managed to give up smoking over 10 years ago but I can't give up alcohol. With smoking it was that I'd tried and failed to quit several times but one day it just sort of 'flipped' and I was able to quit. I didn't do anything special, it was like a random mental shift. With alcohol I still don't have that but I hope to one day have that experience with it too.

by Anonymousreply 11January 17, 2022 2:22 PM

We've made a household rule: no drinking on "school nights". Might try to change that to "only one night per week".

by Anonymousreply 12January 17, 2022 2:26 PM

Take up yoga. You will see and feel a difference very quickly, and you will get a lot of satisfaction being in charge of improving your health. I do a little every day, and a whole sequence at least three times a week. It makes me feel great, and it is another reason not to go back to drinking.

by Anonymousreply 13January 17, 2022 2:27 PM

The first few months after I quit, I became very preoccupied (almost anxious) about having something “adult” to drink instead. Buying all types of kombucha and herbal teas and nonalcoholic flavored tinctures, trying to prove to myself that I could substitute a comparable ritual to a “sophisticated” glass of wine at night, or that I’d have something to order at a bar other than water. I think it was really anxiousness about not fitting in. After a few months I totally forgot about this worry and am fine just ordering a club soda.

The lesson from this is to give yourself some space to become a little weird about things in the first few months after you stop, because it takes some time to adjust and feel comfortable.

by Anonymousreply 14January 17, 2022 2:29 PM

I used to drink a lot and thought that, hmmmm, maybe there's a problem here. However, over the years, it's been my body that's been telling me to slow down. I do like my occasional drink but I can't drink the way I used to. Two drinks and my body says "Enough". I drink maybe once or twice a month these days.

by Anonymousreply 15January 17, 2022 2:29 PM

One big change I noticed in myself was less of a desire to stay out with friends or stay late at parties. I think for drinkers, this gets chalked up to non-drinkers being boring. But what it really is is that alcohol distorts our perceptions of time—when you’re sober, time doesn’t fly by the way it does when you’re drunk, so after 3 or 4 hours of socializing you’re tired and want to go home. And that’s normal. Don’t worry it makes you boring.

by Anonymousreply 16January 17, 2022 2:30 PM

same here, as I've aged the body has told me that that was too much if I have one too many, and it might only be two beers, but alone has halved my drinking in the past few years

by Anonymousreply 17January 17, 2022 2:31 PM

This book is really odd but very effective.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 18January 17, 2022 2:33 PM

Just stop.

by Anonymousreply 19January 17, 2022 2:39 PM

Remember - You can't drink with a dick in your mouth!

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 20January 17, 2022 2:41 PM

The right meds helped me a great deal. See a shrink and tell them your issues.

by Anonymousreply 21January 17, 2022 2:49 PM

Like r4, I drank two bottles of wine a night for years. I fell and broke my shoulder while blackout drunk. I lost long friendships. That didn’t even stop me from drinking, and I kept at it for another year. I was depressed, anxious, and suicidal. I tried therapeutic ketamine as a last resort. I haven’t had a drink since, and it has been 6 months. I almost feel like it rewired my brain. Research shows that it makes you forget your drinking memories, which makes sense. Every other time that I attempted to quit, I would sit around obsessively fantasizing about a glass of wine. I bought a peloton bike and started working out 5 days a week. I also do yoga and strength training. I have lost 30 pounds, and am now enjoying shopping for a new wardrobe. I am 50 and have six pack abs again. I drink non alcoholic beer when I’m out for dinner or at a party. If ketamine is too extreme for you, try naltrexone. It works for a lot of people, and basically blocks the pleasure center of your brain so you can’t get a buzz from alcohol.

by Anonymousreply 22January 17, 2022 2:52 PM

How does one go about getting a script for ketamine?

by Anonymousreply 23January 17, 2022 3:36 PM

R23, there are clinics in every large city in the US. It is covered by some insurance plans. There are also doctors who will prescribe online and ship the oral tablets to you, but they aren’t as strong as IV or IM. I met a guy in the waiting room who kicked a heroin addiction with it.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 24January 17, 2022 3:42 PM

Exercise , sunlight and laughter

by Anonymousreply 25January 17, 2022 3:56 PM

Surely even the firmest republican men can get behind two men fucking.

by Anonymousreply 26January 17, 2022 4:04 PM

Well, at least try an AA meeting or two.

by Anonymousreply 27January 17, 2022 4:08 PM

1. Don't try quitting both at once. Recipe for failure and a great way to feel even worse about yourself. 2. Start by messing with your consumption. Cut back, change brands/use patterns. Look at how your lifestyle and daily habits/patterns encourages over use and fix that. 3. Analyze why you want to be sober. Seriously. What does not using 'fix' and does it? 4. Check out AA or NA to see if it resonates

by Anonymousreply 28January 17, 2022 4:11 PM

Try harm reduction first op . Cut back each day . I promise you will see positive results quickly . You will never regret drinking or using less or not at all

by Anonymousreply 29January 17, 2022 4:20 PM

Did anyone get anxious about social events while they were trying to quit drinking?

by Anonymousreply 30January 17, 2022 4:39 PM

Day by day. If you really want to you can quit, OP. Meditation helps too. Exercise will aid in releasing pent up aggression about withdrawals.

by Anonymousreply 31January 17, 2022 4:43 PM

Go without booze for a week. It might be a hard week, but after you get past that it’s pretty easy. Avoid social situations until you feel confident that you won’t drink. Usually after 3 weeks, you feel much better.

by Anonymousreply 32January 17, 2022 4:44 PM

R30, stick with the designated drivers. You will feel less conspicuous that you are not drinking. Look into soft drinks that are to your taste. Mine is cranberry juice with lime soda. And always have an escape plan if things are getting to you. You don’t have to stay if you feel at risk.

by Anonymousreply 33January 17, 2022 4:44 PM

Start knitting. Your hands will be too busy to do much drinking and smoking. It would also fuck up the pattern.

by Anonymousreply 34January 17, 2022 4:55 PM

I've been sober for 15 years. I became a vegan and stopped drinking on the same day. My health was really suffering due to extreme alcohol consumption. My fear was more prolonged sickness than death. I finally got therapy and dealt with the impacts of low self esteem due to childhood trauma. That helped and also *exercise* I cannot stress this enough. I did not go the AA route but found a ton of inspiration in the work of Dr.Gabor Mate and secular recovery groups like Lifering.

by Anonymousreply 35January 17, 2022 5:05 PM

Naltrexone - aka, Sinclair method. After various attempts for years, realizing there is a largely scientific, medical method was a revelation. Disconnects the biological “click” mechanism in your brain from drinking. Subtly over a year, I lost interest. I’m still amazed.

Also the Allen Carr book is good - regardless of how else you choose to attack it.

by Anonymousreply 36January 17, 2022 5:12 PM

I did think about taking Naltrexone but I also wanted to avoid quitting one substance and replacing it with another

by Anonymousreply 37January 17, 2022 5:16 PM

The Allen Carr book - you will start reading it and think, WTF?? But it’s extremely convincing. It flips the argument around from “use your willpower to stay strong and not drink” to “alcohol is poison, it’s not tasty or fun, and today you get to celebrate that you never need to touch it again.”

by Anonymousreply 38January 17, 2022 5:19 PM

Live, laugh, love

by Anonymousreply 39January 17, 2022 5:24 PM

Think about what drinking has cost you. The incidents that leave you embarrassed or the ways you hurt your relationships. The money you could have right now if someone could refund you for every bottle.

And think seriously about how bad it can get. It can get bad. Very very bad. I've seen drunks who would black out, stumble and fall, break bones and then still deny there was a problem. Are you there yet? It's waiting for you.

Be more afraid of drinking than afraid of not having a drink.

by Anonymousreply 40January 17, 2022 5:27 PM

If one is convinced they are an alcoholic, and they have family members who are alcoholic, is casual drinking even a possibility? Could there ever be a happy medium or is abstinence the only way to go?

by Anonymousreply 41January 17, 2022 6:02 PM

You only take naltrexone when you are going to drink. After a while, when you lose the desire to drink, you don’t take it. I went from drinking 5-6/day to once a week to once a month to once very 2-3 months when on vacation. Probably used 60 pills over the course of a year.

by Anonymousreply 42January 17, 2022 6:04 PM

R41 For genuine alcoholics, casual drinking isn't possible. The alcoholic will not be able to stop at 1 or 2 drinks. If they have family members who are alcoholics, that means their risk of being one is greater but not necessarily that they are one.

by Anonymousreply 43January 17, 2022 6:11 PM

R43, I do not drink every day (more like every other day ..) and every time I do, I drink to black out.

by Anonymousreply 44January 17, 2022 6:13 PM

I’m a 34 year old alcoholic and used to drink 3-4 whisky+Sprite Zeros per night a couple years ago. Working from home is hard because I can drink all day as well. So that brings the total to probably 10-12 drinks per day. I would be worried about being embarrassed, but all of my personal relationships broke down long ago, due to anxiety and depression (pre-alcoholism). I also rarely go out, so I’m not concerned with drunk driving. Best of all, I’m fat and have high blood pressure, so I will be able to peacefully die in my apartment in a few years without all the hassle of growing old and managing life’s conflicts.

by Anonymousreply 45January 17, 2022 6:28 PM

R44 I hear you, mate. I am an alcoholic too. If you're drinking to black out, that's not moderate drinking. There are different kinds of alcoholics - the key is if it negatively affects your life/health/relationships/finances/work, etc., you probably have a problem with alcohol.

by Anonymousreply 46January 17, 2022 6:29 PM

For many people, there’s a time of day that’s their “drinking time.” If you can fill that time with something else, you’re unlikely to drink.

If I can from 5:00-8:00pm without drinking, I’m good.

Also, if I can get really engrossed in a movie or show, I don’t really miss drinking. But good movies and shows are somewhat few and far between.

Then you have to address the “treat” issue. For me, wine was my only “treat.” I don’t have much of anything else that gives me pleasure. I love my family, but they are mostly work and I can’t be myself around them.

by Anonymousreply 47January 17, 2022 6:33 PM

If you fall off the wagon, it's not the end of the world. Don't beat yourself up about it. It can feel impossible to break this habit, OP. But you must keep at it, because you're determined to succeed.

by Anonymousreply 48January 17, 2022 6:59 PM

As has been mentioned upthread, substitute another habit for drinking. This works for people like me, those who tend to drink too much and want to quit/cut down.

I use the old standby - V8, the low sodium version. It's extremely satisfying and low in calories! I used to have 2-4 vodkas a night. Now I have 2-4 beers or vodkas a week. I fell off the wagon during the worst of the pandemic, back on it since Nov and I've lost 5 pounds to boot.

by Anonymousreply 49January 17, 2022 7:00 PM

I tried everything for years. AA, cold turkey, bargaining, cutting back.

But deep down? I knew I wasn't done drinking. And I wasn't.

Then one day? I was done. No idea why. Haven't touched alcohol in years. Nor have I gone to an AA meeting or labored over missing a drink or anything like that. I was just finished with my relationship with booze.

This is probably of no help to you, OP! But it does sort of feel like once I stopped being so preoccupied with quitting, my brain just told me to quit.

by Anonymousreply 50January 17, 2022 7:54 PM

R50 omg, that's exactly what I was saying in post R11. Yet despite having experienced it with smoking, I still can't tap into it with regard to alcohol. Fuck.

by Anonymousreply 51January 17, 2022 7:58 PM

R50, I new someone who easily stopped drinking like that during pregnancy. It wasn't like she was a heavy drinker before, but she hasn't touched a drop since. Kid is six years old.

by Anonymousreply 52January 17, 2022 8:11 PM

It was like that for me too R50. I looked at myself in the mirror one day and I was done.

by Anonymousreply 53January 17, 2022 8:22 PM

For some people, drinking is a habit. Sometimes habits are replaced by other habits without our really noticing.

I used to be in the habit of watching a lot of tv. I don’t any more, and don’t miss it. Never made a conscious attempt to stop.

Same thing with sweets and restaurants. Just fell out of the habit of eating sweets. Restaurants gone due to covid.

The trick is to “fall” out of the habit of drinking— ideally by doing something you like even more than drinking.

by Anonymousreply 54January 17, 2022 8:31 PM

Interesting that others here share my experience. I wonder if we could bottle (teehee) it somehow? I would love to be able to give it to other problem drinkers a way out. I know AA just isn't it for many, if not most, of us. And I know how horrible being chained to the drink is. It was/is fucking awful.

Btw, I was a category 5 drunk. Physically addicted for sure. I even had a seizure once when I didn't have a drink for a few days. I was that bad.

But when I was done? I was done.

by Anonymousreply 55January 17, 2022 8:37 PM

V8 is essential for detox . It is wonderful. I also stress lots of water, Gatorade . Distract yourself with other activities

by Anonymousreply 56January 17, 2022 8:37 PM

Age definitely plays a part - for the heavy drinkers who become alcoholics. At some point some people do age into and out of it. For some it’s black and white - drinking to black out at 20. For others it creeps up. A big lesson for me was realizing that drinking only on weekends can still be alcoholism.

by Anonymousreply 57January 17, 2022 9:14 PM

I do a dry month at least once, if not twice, a year. Last year I did it in January and June. I'm doing January again, so far so good. I've been a controlled medium to heavy drinker but I want to practice more moderation.

If you can get through the first few (2-3) weeks you'll be fine.

If you're physically dependent on alcohol to the point you get DTs/shakes from stopping, go to the doctor to help you quit.

by Anonymousreply 58January 17, 2022 9:20 PM

I would never describe myself as an alcoholic, but definitely enjoyed drinking regularly, often to excess. A lot of it was social drinking with friends and coworkers, but I did a fair amount at home, too, as I enjoyed making cocktails and martinis and watching movies, etc.

Maybe 5 years ago I started to feel like the recovery time from drinking was too much, and (for example) having drinks on Friday night would pretty much kill Saturday for me..sometimes even spilling over into Sunday before I felt good again.

I stopped altogether 2 years ago. Just decided my body could (apparently) not process alcohol like it used to, probably because of aging, and I didn't want to feel so lethargic in the aftermath anymore. I had the urge to drink here and there for maybe the first 6 months but enjoyed feeling "normal" more, so I continued to abstain. It was also the start of Covid and I didn't want to worsen any habits while living like a shut-in for a while.

I am right at 2 years now and really have no desire to drink alcohol again. I have definitely seen a decline in social life because of it (I won't really do things with friends if the main focus is drinking), but I kind of don't care, either!

I should add that my husband went through several very difficult years in succession where both a sister and his father died from cancer, which devastated him and caused him to go through a major depression that involved an increase in drinking that got to a scary level in late 2019. In an effort to get him back from the brink of something bad, my decision to let drinking go was definitely expedited. We both haven't touched alcohol in 2 years. We spend zero time or money in bars now, whereas in the past we partied hard and loved every minute of it. But there are new things to focus on now.

Honestly, if I tallied up the money I spent on drinking in 20 years I could probably have bought a house (or an apartment... I live in NYC). So there are definite advantages to giving it up.

by Anonymousreply 59January 17, 2022 9:39 PM

R45 You are so young, don't give up on life yet. I fully understand how working from home makes it hard to stop drinking. Try cutting back, make a schedule for your drinks. I finally cut back on my heavy drinking when I read how unpleasant it is to die of alcohol poisoning. Be assured your death "alone in your apartment" will NOT be peaceful for you. You can be healthy even fat with high blood pressure, but not with drinking alcoholically.

Your isolation and drinking is common with people on the autistic spectrum. Have you ever seen a therapist? Even if you don't want to, getting information on the reasons people self-medicate with alcohol can be helpful.

I hope this doesn't come off as a scold or lecture. Alcohol abuse is not a moral failing. Please take care!!

by Anonymousreply 60January 17, 2022 10:51 PM

R60, alcohol kills anxiety

by Anonymousreply 61January 17, 2022 11:33 PM

R45, I was like you. My anxiety and depression got so much better once I quit drinking. The alcohol fuels both, and you don’t really know what your baseline level of depression and anxiety is until you get it out of your system for a few weeks. Then you can work on getting medication to treat the depression. You will lose weight too, and maybe start walking and get some exercise. You are too young to just give up.

by Anonymousreply 62January 17, 2022 11:45 PM

[quote]I looked at myself in the mirror one day and I was done.

Well.....that's sounds good, but I still have six bottles of wine in the fridge, and I must finish them, you know the cost and everything...

by Anonymousreply 63January 17, 2022 11:50 PM

I quit both drinking and smoking, a couple of decades apart. Here are things that worked for me.

Tracking (for alcohol): Track how much you're drinking. Not talking about eyeballing shots of vodka. Measure it out and log down how many ounces, per day, you're drinking. I also tracked how much I was spending, per month, on alcohol. This gives you a clear idea of what your habit is.

Have a specific date where you intend to quit. I like to know that I have ___ more weeks or days that I can drink and then it's over. You at least feel like you get one last hurrah.

Cold turkey was the only way I could quit smoking. With drinking, I could cut down for a short while, but it was easier to just quit.

by Anonymousreply 64January 17, 2022 11:59 PM

Get over DTs and never drink again.

by Anonymousreply 65January 17, 2022 11:59 PM

Did anyone have any bad experiences with friends peer pressuring them to drink again?

by Anonymousreply 66January 18, 2022 1:14 AM

R66, no one should pressure anyone to drink again. Any "friend" who would do this is not a friend.

by Anonymousreply 67January 18, 2022 1:50 AM

My ‘best friend’ is trying to make plans for us to go on vacation together ‘when I start drinking again’.

by Anonymousreply 68January 18, 2022 1:54 AM

R68, that is what worries me. My friends not inviting me places or making plans with me because I’ve stopped drinking.

by Anonymousreply 69January 18, 2022 2:00 AM

That means you don't have that much in common, just drinking alcohol together.

by Anonymousreply 70January 18, 2022 2:02 AM

[quote] Did anyone have any bad experiences with friends peer pressuring them to drink again?

Yes, and not necessarily the people I would have guessed. Not outright pressure, but a lot of acting concerned, like “what are you going to drink? Are you still not drinking? But you only want water? Are you sure? Etc.” Some people I thought were friends avoided me, others seemed very self-conscious about their drinking around me, others didn’t want to spend time with me if drinking wasn’t involved.

But luckily I have a lot of awesome friends who just wanted me to be happy and still hang with me.

by Anonymousreply 71January 18, 2022 2:04 AM

R71 that’s what I’m dreading. I understand that someone who would avoid me for quitting drinking isn’t a true friend, but it would be painful and disappointing just the same finding that out about them.

by Anonymousreply 72January 18, 2022 2:08 AM

R72 By the time this started happening to me, I was feeling the effects of not drinking for a month or two—as healthy as a horse, sleeping like a baby, with glowing skin—so it becomes more perplexing than anything. You think, I wish people like that could feel how great it feels not to drink.

by Anonymousreply 73January 18, 2022 2:11 AM

R73, I want to know that feeling, and I think I’m ready to try and find out

by Anonymousreply 74January 18, 2022 2:15 AM

Write a list of all the good things there about never drinking. I'll help you start. 1) Will never get a DUI. 2) No more hangovers. 3) No more worrying the next day about what stupid thing you may have said or done. etc etc

by Anonymousreply 75January 18, 2022 2:17 AM

Yeah, the skin on my face improved after I quit drinking. It took maybe 3 months or so to notice, but it does look better now.

by Anonymousreply 76January 18, 2022 2:22 AM

[quote] No more worrying the next day about what stupid thing you may have said or done.

The feeling of calm from never again waking up, thinking this or looking at my phone to see if I drunk texted someone…

The feeling of calm in general is wonderful. When people talk about feeling “grounded” - that’s how I feel. Like I’m standing strong with two feet flat on the ground. Not shaky, with a headache, feeling down in the dumps.

You’ll get there!

by Anonymousreply 77January 18, 2022 2:28 AM

My friends were THRILLED when I finally quit. But I also do not care at all if they drink around me. Excess booze was my issue. Not theirs.

It also helps that none are big drinkers. If they do want a night out (or in) that involved heavy drinking (and of course that happens), I Uber home when I've had enough.

by Anonymousreply 78January 18, 2022 2:29 AM

My grown son quit drinking and smoking weed a year ago. I couldn't believe the difference in him. I didn't know he was addicted to smoking marijuana until he told me. I had just thought he was a bit, well, um, dim. Or maybe he had had too many concussions surfing. When he got sober, he was bright, clear, motivated. Our conversations were better, fewer misunderstandings. He got sober via MA and AA. Then he took the only job he could find. In a restaurant. Within weeks, he was using again. He didn't have to tell me. I could hear it in his voice. I remembered something I had heard a long time ago. Getting sober the second time is much much harder. Don't know if this is true.

by Anonymousreply 79January 18, 2022 2:35 AM

All these great things about being ___ time sober.

There will be hard times where you just want a drink to take the edge off. It's night, you're lonely tired, etc. You do just have to dig deep into yourself and shift your focus. Jump into the shower, etc.

The HALT acronym is maybe cheesy-sounding and hilarious, but true. Watch out for these times:

H - Hungry

A - Angry

L - Lonely

T - Tired

by Anonymousreply 80January 18, 2022 2:38 AM

I stopped drinking alcohol in 1985. I then proceeded to marijuana maintenance . I then focused on prescription drugs. I knew it had to end .

Never relapsed on alcohol . My true sobriety date is 2008.

I found AA meetings helpful . TAKE WHATS HELPFUL AND LEAVE THE REST. Trust yourself about who to open up with in private . Stay away from AA nazis .

Don’t get hung up with higher power bullshit . It all boils down to the fact that something is running this universe and it ain’t me.

It hasn’t been a cakewalk . Of course I feel like drinking and using . But I think through what it will lead to.

Most of all ignore the AA platitudes like the obsession has been removed and I’m happy joyous and free . Lol

by Anonymousreply 81January 18, 2022 2:52 AM

R81 I would eventually like to stop using marijuana as well. I just feel like quitting alcohol and marijuana both at the same time wouldn’t work out. But I do want to achieve complete sobriety eventually

by Anonymousreply 82January 18, 2022 2:57 AM

[quote]Did anyone have any bad experiences with friends peer pressuring them to drink again?

How old are you people, seventeen?

by Anonymousreply 83January 18, 2022 12:20 PM

R83 is an asshole but that is to be expected on DL.

by Anonymousreply 84January 18, 2022 1:12 PM

The non alcohol beers are excellent nowadays. And they appear to be quite popular judging from how much variety there is. Some people say it isn't even wise to drink these but it works for me!

by Anonymousreply 85January 18, 2022 1:13 PM

I spent most of 2021 trying to give up alcohol.

My last drink was Labor Day 2021.

In order to give up alcohol I first had to give up caffeine. I gave up coffee and sodas.

If I drank enough caffeine to get that nervous, jittery feeling I would start craving alcohol.

It’s like my brain would start screaming “enough of the stimulant I need a depressant”.

Once I gave up caffeine going without alcohol was easy.

by Anonymousreply 86January 19, 2022 12:19 AM

This might sound weird, but I have a friend who quit smoking and she says what helped her was coffee enemas. She said she did a coffee enema once every other day for two weeks, as well as drank at least two liters of water. She said after that, her nicotine cravings were gone.

by Anonymousreply 87January 19, 2022 12:23 AM

Spend time in church

by Anonymousreply 88January 19, 2022 12:23 AM

Woo, smell r25!

by Anonymousreply 89January 19, 2022 12:42 AM

R89, like Chanel number 9

by Anonymousreply 90January 19, 2022 12:53 AM

R80, I heard HALT many times as danger flags.

But what do you do about it? No one ever explains what you do about being in HALT.

I guess you can eat and sleep. But the feelings are much more difficult. I think lying to yourself about feeling angry or lonely does not help.

I guess you can go scream at someone. Or fuck someone. But they do not seem healthy either.

by Anonymousreply 91January 19, 2022 1:05 AM

R89 we don't do the "smell" so and so anymore. Let's stop.

by Anonymousreply 92January 19, 2022 1:07 AM

Just stop. That's it. That's what I did.

I also started drinking tons of seltzer whenever I needed SOMETHING. The physical habit of reaching for a drink is still there, but at least I'm not reaching for something unhealthy.

THC edibles can help take the edge off, as well. I indulge occasionally in the hour before I go to bed.

Good luck, OP.

by Anonymousreply 93January 19, 2022 1:15 AM

I second low dose pot edibles. Really makes a difference

by Anonymousreply 94January 19, 2022 1:27 AM

R91, the HALT stuff is for you to be aware of why you might be craving alcohol.

Hunger: just have some food on hand. If you don't have food on hand, just go get something to eat (instead of drinking).

Anger: No one is saying to deny your anger. Just realize that you're angry and may not be in the best state to make sound decisions, e.g., I'm going to "tie one on," drink until I'm passed out. You need to wait until you're in a better state of mind and decide how to address whatever made you angry.

L: Lonely. Have a list of friends who you can call when you feel lonely and feel like drinking. You can tell them in advance: hey, can I put you on my list. This is why they give you a "sponsor" in AA.

T: Tired. Another thing to be prepared for. Get enough sleep. Take a shower. Wind down. Things can wait until tomorrow. Relax & get some sleep. You're not going to make any great decisions on a mind that's worn ragged.

I hope this helps!

by Anonymousreply 95January 19, 2022 2:42 AM

R95, What really helped was leaving AA, because it was the L that got to me. I had to talk to someone when I wanted to use. That was not an option for me in 12-step recovery. (I have since learned that there are sponsors and members who will talk to someone who was feeling like they might use--I did not know that when I was in the program.)

I may be cranky because this was my problem in the program. I needed practical help in stopping and the only suggestions was to pray. That was never enough for me and I really could not do it on my own. I needed help when I was right in the midst of the struggle---and to my relief my non-addict friends were there for me.

by Anonymousreply 96January 19, 2022 2:53 AM

See a professional who works with substance use.

by Anonymousreply 97January 19, 2022 2:55 AM

R96, I used AA just as an example. Frankly, I think it's just as good if not better to call a long-time friend who maybe just doesn't enjoy drinking alcohol (and doesn't have a problem with it). I worry that two alcoholics talking might lead to both relapsing.

by Anonymousreply 98January 19, 2022 3:14 AM

[quote] I second low dose pot edibles. Really makes a difference

In what way? Do you take them only when you crave a drink?

by Anonymousreply 99January 19, 2022 10:51 PM

Switch to Heroin

by Anonymousreply 100January 19, 2022 10:54 PM

Getting sober is easy. Staying sober after the 2 month honeymoon is hard. Have a plan, have support, fill your time, start lifting weights. Get a personal fitness trainer for accountability if you can afford it. If you need meds, explore that avenue.

by Anonymousreply 101January 20, 2022 1:45 AM

My sobriety involves my NOT eating any cookies, cake, ice cream, candy and pie.

by Anonymousreply 102January 20, 2022 1:54 AM
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