Who Keeps Stealing Little Debbie Snack Cakes in Missouri & Why?

They didn't even steal the good kind, the swiss rolls and the nutty buddies.

Fake news! Suzy Q's are Hostess.

If they make a movie of this it will become DL's "Ocean's Eleven".

I was in LA!

Move aside LV for the cake raiders!

Why are these boxes in storage units?

They were hired by Chrissy Metz! She hasn't been making enough money to cover her food bill as of late and refused to go on a diet.

Which one of you fat whores did this!

Suzanne and Anthony while visiting Charlene's family.

I admit it -- I've emptied out all the rest of the U.S. states, so Missouri is all that's left now and it's MINE!

[quote]If they make a movie of this it will become DL's "Ocean's Eleven".

THE THOMAS CRUNCH AFFAIR

r3 more like an episode of Cannon

Has anyone seen the ghost of Ginny in Billing?

Not Greg since he dead

J'ACCUSE CHARLENE FRAZIER-STILLFIELD!

MMMmmmmm... Little Debbie Snack Cakes by the boxful.... **drools**

If it were me, it would be all about the nutty bars, star crunches, and those weird Christmas tree cake things.

My snack purse doesn't fill itself for free.

Was it a great big fat person?

Question: who keeps Little Debbie Snack Cakes in a storage unit?

There is a party store, used to be decent when it was a 7 Eleven years ago but since has gone downhill. Anyway, this guy keeps Twinkies, Little Debbie's, that kind of stuff in a big freezer case. Weird and I have never bought anything there except a soda late one night.

There is nothing weird about keeping snack cakes in a freezer case. You haven't lived until experienced breaking those cakes out from a frozen state.

[quote]Who Keeps Stealing Little Debbie Snack Cakes in Missouri & Why?

Maybe I can help from personal experience, although I think calling any part of the missing little princess that horrible term is disgusting:

Was - I mean is - Debbie ever a winner in the National Tiny Miss Beauty competition who embarrassed her mommy by having a potty tantrum during the sashing photo session?

Popular Bluffs, Missouri and the waxy awfulness of cheap Little Debbie chocolate snacks. Damn, that’s depressing.

I'm glad they didn't touch the Fancy Cakes. They don't deserve Little Debbie's best.

OP, the correct headline would be " Which one of you bitches keeps doing this?"

Well, when you’re in Poplar Bluffs, you have to do SOMETHING!

They thought the packages said Little Doobies.

Does Donald Trump have an alibi?

[quote] "nutty buddies"

My mother LOVED the Nutty Buddy, R1, and would usually only purchase those. I got burned out. I DID love the Oatmeal Cream Pies, & Star Crunch though. Now, it's all too sweet for me.

I WILL say (because someone mentioned Hostess above) that I still like the Hostess Lemon, & Cherry Pies, but it's been at least a decade since I had either.

Sounds like they're Debophiles.

Here's one of my many dirty little secrets. Once upon a time I lived with someone who would get high, and snack in the evening hours. I didn't care that he did any of those things, but I had had other issues with that asshole. And I did most of the grocery shopping because that was something I did enjoy. So I'd buy Little Debbie oatmeal snack cakes and barbeque chips because I knew I would not eat them, but I knew he would go to them for his late night cravings. And then he got fat. And then I left him.

Get Jessica Fletcher on the case!

Follow the crumbs.

I once knew a woman who once got arrested for shoplifting a Little Debbie's snackcake. And then she died. Seriously.

One of her daughters also slept with my boyfriend but we're not going to get into that right here or right now.

Mama June claims she broke her teeth on one

Have purse. Will travel.

I remember when Little Debbie’s motto was “snatch a snack today!” That was like around 1990. But too many people said “snack a snatch today!” So they changed it.

I don’t quite understand how cakes stay fresh so long. Biscuits, ie cookies and crackers, sure. But I assume the higher moisture content in cakes quickens expiry.

It’s why I avoid Mr Kipling products which are imported here.

R39 Partially hydrogenated Palm oil, as well as other partially or fully hydrogenated shelf stable oils, chemical preservatives like BHT, sodium benzoate, ascorbic acid, and a whole host of other harder to type and pronounce ingredients.

They age like fine wine.

Is this another thread where old, fat hoes populate and talk about caks and Chrissy?

I certainly hope so.

Me!!!!

[quote] it will become DL's "Ocean's Eleven"

I think you mean "Oceans Ate."

I love this one...

It's not me. And anybody who says it is and that they have video proof of me cramming Oatmeal Creme Pies into my mouth one after the other and weeping, is lying.

Is Chrissy Metz in town?

Did Charlene move back after Bill came out and divorced her? If so, her. If not,,one of the other -lene Frazier girls.

I made that bitch disappear.

R40 Ascorbic acid is a form of Vitamin C, which wouldn’t bother me used as a preservative. I don’t subscribe to the “don’t eat anything you can’t pronounce” school of thought. Palm oil bothers me not for health reasons but because of the logging. But in any case I don’t see the point in eating a cake that’s been sitting on a shelf for 6 months when you can buy a fresh one pretty much daily at any major supermarket.

I confess..

R51 Yes, that one is natural. I have no arguments with you, and I don't purchase these, yet I must confess I have always been attracted to the appearance of the Fancy Cakes.

I finally gave into my curiosity late one night roughly eleven years ago, and bought a box of them. I was madly disappointed. They had very little to no discernible actual flavour, other than being too sweet. The icing was grainy, and left a waxy film behind. They look so much better than they taste. I fell for the script on the box as well. They really [italic] looked [/italic] fancy. I have not purchased any Little Debbie since, and probably never will. (I may have enjoyed a Dolly Madison Cherry or Apple pie on rare occasion however since then.)

It's gotta be Charlene and one of her family members from Hee Haw.

I’m sorry, mom wouldn’t let me put them in the grocery cart, it was the only way!

I love that there's at least one other person on here who reads the Unresolved Mysteries reddit.

I gained the freshman 15 because my college provided Little Debbie Zebra Cakes, and I had never had them. I also had very little self control, with unfettered access to processed sugar.

[quote] It’s why I avoid Mr Kipling products which are imported here.

There is a world of difference between the preservatives in American and Brit snacks. Mr Kipling will last a few weeks, while an American Twinkie is essentially immortal.

I'm guessing the units are overflow stock from nearby convenience stores?

Why else would there be storage lockers full of snack cakes?

But why would someone steal so many snack cakes?

When I was in grad school, I worked near a bodega that would sell individual Little Debbie snack cakes from the box for 25 cents each. Since I was super poor, I'd buy four of them for $1 and that would be my meal. Oh how I loved wondering which kinds would be put out on the rack and choosing which ones I'd get.

And then I got fat.

Update: a shifty-looking duck in a chef’s hat has been declared a person of interest.

Is this part of the reason it’s so difficult to find Banana Twins?

Black market snack cakes. Now I've heard it all!

[quote] I love that there's at least one other person on here who reads the Unresolved Mysteries reddit.

There was a recent thread on missing persons cases that was like an Unresolved Mysteries Greatest Hits, it made me laugh. We are legion!

Betty Crocker can be a real bitch.

If one is partial to trash-tier "snack cakes," these are the superior of anything Hostess or Little Debbie produces. These taste like how Twinkies are supposed to taste.

Fat whores who else

Bonnie and Clyde: Fat Whore Edition

My, my, my.

Where is Hercule Poirot when you need him?

burp!

Buns? Your buns? You bought buns and you didn't tell me? Where are they? Where are the buns?

It must be an inside job.

I’m guessing the storage spaces belonged to a sales rep, whose ne’er do well brother or teenager is stealing the snacks to sell.

Are Anne Blythe’s whereabouts accounted for?

I don't know, but I am pretty damn tired of everybody staring at MY SNACK PURSE!

[quote] But why would someone steal so many snack cakes?

Why’f effvrybofy wookin at meef?

Fatties on the lamb!!

^ it’s actually on the lam but lamb works better under the circumstances.

R20 Probably people who own a few small convenience stores. They use storage units as a cheap central warehouse.

I wonder if the Little Debbie Snack Cakes are sold on eBay or if the thieves simply pig out.

It’s the op who keeps seeing her boyfriend at the mall.

ENJOY YOUR SNACK CAKES, LOIS AND SHIMMY!!

I demand Biden gives them a pardon should those snack cake hooligans get caught!

Are they great big fat people?

[quote]I don’t quite understand how cakes stay fresh so long.

I learned the hard way that they don't always stay fresh for very long! They were discontinuing the coffee cakes so I bought three boxes of them, and didn't go through them very quickly, and by the second box they were too stale to eat. Probably only had them about two months before they died. I'd assumed they were 90% preservatives!

Is it you op?

But they’re so moist, is it really a crime??

I feel like someone should have made a Zinger Zapper joke by now.

Was this crime ever solved?

Hah! I was actually just thinking about this thread yesterday when I passed and resisted the he Little Debbie display at the supermarket. This thread inspired my love of the Strawberry Shortcake rolls. I get them at least once a month.

Doesn't appear to have been solved, r89. I noticed in a search other LD thefts. None seem to have been solved except one when they were in a stolen trailer and the trailer got spotted.

The thieves probably sell them right away at swap meets and flea markets so the evidence gets eaten quickly

Vachon pastries are better. They wasted their time.

I admit it , it was ME !!! But now i am so sick of eating little debbie that my lips and tongue will NEVAH be the same, it was like a sugar acid bleach. HELP ME !!!

You know why op.

This is Carlene Dawber. I think my exhusband is to blame.

Little Debbie is a lez. It's true.

^that's what I heard growing up in Chattanooga.

[quote]sped off in a Lincoln MKZ Sedan

I already know how this will end

Who keeps bumping this idiotic thread?

Bump

When I hear Little Debbie I think of this song

Any word on whether the perps have been apprehended?

IDK who is responsible but I truly believe a snack purse may be involved.

[quote]IDK who is responsible

The parents of whatever asked for one of these instead of a traditional birthday cake:

whoever*

The Fat Whore Bandit

When no one was looking, Lex Luthor took 40 snack cakes. He took forty snack cakes. That's as many as four tens. And that's terrible.

stealth fat whore thread.

Amberlynn Reid?