I would LOVE to LIVE like the GOLDEN GIRLS!

About as close as you are going to get OP.

Jesus H. Christ, you mean that exterior wasn't in Miami either? It looked PURE Miami!

Can I have your stuff, OP?

keep your dream alive OP.....I can happen to you

"They never wanted to call it retirement, but for Susan Farnsworth, Leigh Hough and Jean-Philippe Jomini, a throuple — a romantic partnership of three people — that has lived together as an intentional family for over 15 years, it felt important to get a head start on finding a home that would accommodate future needs for aging in place.

Three consultants in their mid-60s, they share a home in Fort Lauderdale, Fla., but decided a few years ago to look for a second home in southern New England, where they have friends and family."

I always thought it would be a good idea for gay and lesbian elder singles to club together in a house and share expenses. And there would be someone there in an emergency, rather than being on one's own.

R4 Do they all three get in bed together or do they take turns?

OP, how much TSP did you end up getting? What fund did you invest in?

There's no way I could afford to live in any of those LGBT communities... Yes, I'm a poor old lesbian.

I thought the idea of the Golden Girls was that if you had three roommates, you could afford to live in a decent house.

Who would want to deal with New England winters when you are a hip fracture just waiting to happen on a good day?

Have you tried your local Stop N' Shop circa 1987?

I'd be worried about all of Blanche's hook-ups in the house. She's a whore.

How do you know R11 OP won't be the "Blanche?"

[quote] OP, how much TSP did you end up getting? What fund did you invest in?

r7 I retired with the FSPS, but cashed out my TSP to buy a house.

R11 That's unfair. Blanche hardly ever brought a trick home. She always played away games.

OP you will have one of your roommates move in his senile mother who will call you a slut.

OP do you have a closetful of fancy beaded gowns for all the charities functions, award programs and dinners you'll attend?

Will you keep the gay houseboy or write him out after one episode?

Sophia would have to go, there is no reason to keep her around and she doesn't cook that good.

I would like to find a situation like this too when I'm that age, but I'm always afraid it would turn out more like this:

Well, in today's housing market, you ain't gonna find that kind of house on four ladies social security checks. I mean, why else would you live with three strange, poor women you don't know?

Hell, THEY couldn't even live on Social Security checks. Three of the four had jobs.

^^^ All the while, Blanch sits at home reading magazines and masterbating.

Blanche had a job. She worked at the museum. Sophia's the one who didn't (other than an occasional one-off venture in fast food).

[quote] "They never wanted to call it retirement, but for Susan Farnsworth, Leigh Hough and Jean-Philippe Jomini […] Three consultants in their mid-60s"

They don’t believe in labels.

Here you go, Op! Dreams cum true!

I know four eldergays who are living together. Three still work. One has a lot of medical issues. One has become an animal hoarder. The other two would move out if they could afford to.

Well, Kate & Allie lived together. I wonder how that happened. I loved that show!

Here ya go, OP.

OP, I'm a couple of years older than you and retired from the Feds 10 years ago (under CSRS). Great pension, untouched TSP, and lots of assets. Where do you want to go?

Blanche even gave the other girls ownership in the home. Now that’s a friend.

R13 FSPS? Are you Foreign Service? How many years did you do?

My grandmother lived like the Golden Girls.

First, she and her favorite sister bought a house together on a lovely little pond in the south. It was so idyllic, with Spanish moss draped from the trees and beautiful white egrets swooping down over the water.

Years later, her other siblings lost their spouses and she and her sister who had been living together built a house with another of their sisters and their brother. All of them had outlived their spouses and like on the Golden Girls one of them also had a living ex who came around now and then and the sisters all held in disdain. The house had one central living room with four bedrooms off of it and a four-car garage. They got along well with squabbles like the Golden Girls. Their brother died and a close friend of one of the sisters moved in.

I honestly think their setup was probably inspired by the Golden Girls. Both sides of my family have a tradition of the grandparents and extended family elders moving in, but this was a different type of communal arrangement in which they took care of one another, stayed with peers and remained very socially active. I think being with people your own age rather than being the old person in the family house must create greater vitality since people don't think of themselves as the old fogie, and especially with siblings who bring out childhood memories and sibling competitiveness forever.

They maintained the arrangement for a very long time, but inevitably, only two were left and they had to sell the house and move elsewhere to be better taken care of. My grandmother moved in with my uncle and died at almost 94 from old age, literally two weeks after he died from glioblastoma. Her surviving sister fought tooth and nail and cried her eyes out when she was put into assisted living, and then within a few weeks she was madly in love with a new boyfriend. (Her mental faculties had suffered quite a bit.)

I have a friend who is into rehabbing buildings. He bought a 5 story small apartment building (2 units per floor) and has been slowly rehabbing it, unit by unit. (New windows, updated kitchens and baths, better flooring, updated electrical). His intent is to sell it as condos to his gay friends so that in the end it will be a completely gay building. It is within about 3-4 blocks of grocery, hardware, laundry, shopping So far, he has 4 of the units bought/occupied. To me, that is the best of all worlds - gay friends close enough to get together for parties and card games or a glass of wine, and available to give one another rides to the doctor's office, or borrow a cup of sugar, , but not actually sharing a living space with one another. He is 63 and he's marketing it to his friends who are nearing or just past retirement age. I don't think he'll make a ton of money on the project, because he does high end remodels and probably won't price units at their current market value, but he intends to live there himself, so he's actually building his own "gay retirement village".

That sounds terrific r33, I want one of those condos.

[quote] [R13] FSPS? Are you Foreign Service? How many years did you do?

r31 Yes, I did 23 years in the Foreign Service. I had tours in Nicaragua, Colombia, New Zealand, England, Saudi Arabia and Bahrain.

Do you happen to be r29? Take me to live in Molokai, and I will be yours forever!

r35 I was not in the Foreign Service (with another Fed agency for 37 years), but I too worked in Saudi Arabia--at the embassy which was in Jidda/Jeddah back then--and was also at the consulates in Riyadh and Dhahran, and the embassy in Bahrain. (This was in1981.)

I've never been to Molokai, though--just Oahu, Maui, and the Big Island. What makes you want to go there? Seems like it would be very isolated.

R35 I think I saw your comments before. I am also FS, but still an ELO.

Any tips?

R27- Kate and Allie was a LAME show.

I'm talking heresy here but Friends was a better show than Kate and Allie

Goozgle Cohousing OP.

Blanche's house was actually pretty small and I think nothing would be worse than having to share living quarters with three strangers in one's dotage.

Now, living nearby one's loved ones would be a different story.

What if one of the roomate’s boyfriends did a midnight stroll? What if another’s hired escort made off with all the silverware or left skid marks all over my fine new furniture?? I’d also be worried that two roommates would die close together and put the whole situation in financial peril.

This will end in tears

R40 I am betting you have never visited anyone in a nursing home. The only personal space residents have is a small bedroom and sometimes have to share a room.

At least GGs had the kitchen, living room and lanai.

R42, actually, I'm betting I've spent a lot more time in nursing homes than you have, but the ladies in GG (Sophia aside) did not have to choose between Shady Pines and communal living.

There are other options, you know.

Not many options for retirees without enough assets to cover their housing in retirement, r43.

I would love to have neighbors like Dr. George and Renee Corliss, not to.mention Chuckie/Mr. Fixit.

Don't forget to visit Mr Ha Ha's Hot Dog Hacienda!

I’m pissed off. I hear those fucking squirrels running across my roof! One of those bastards will be inside my house before long.

I think Betty White to anchor the whole thing.

This looks fun.

Yeah, the Villages. About 70 percent Trumpers. Hell on earth.

With my luck, wherever I move to, I'll be surrounded by Frieda Claxtons.

r51=All the Celia Rubinsteins of the world.

Once you LEARN to TYPE and maybe interact WITH others perhaps YOU can.

Are there Jews in the neighborhood? That Carol Weston person does come off as quite Jewish, agreed?

OP, do you have a delusional roommate who thinks she is Miss Angie Dickinson?

I'd never get anything done. It would like one of those interminable passive aggressive Pines weeks with everyone making sure everyone else was skiing their share.

The planned retirement communities always seem a bit creepy to me. The organized activities would scare me off straight away.

The only way some corporate scheme of that sort might be attractive is it it were in some historic inn or a too big British or Irish country house that lent itself to being split into small apartments of a couple rooms each, a tiny kitchen, and a shared restaurant/club.

The examples I've seen in real life include former gay couples who remained friends and restored a townhouse, each taking one floor and letting a couple other floors out (or selling them -- which in effect leaves a community of two.) And I've known older men (singly and collectively) who owned large houses who informally rented out rooms, a much better grade group house I suppose.

Poor Rose, almost 100. Facing life alone. Miles & the girls all dead. I hope her bland, forgettable children make it to Miami once in a while.

Did Rose ever marry that midget queen Dr. Jonathan Newman?

^I think that was all tied up in the episode where the expectation was that she would reject him because he was a midget, but then it turned out that he rejected her because she wasn't Jewish.

OP, one of my best friends and I seriously talk about it, too.

Friends cannot replace the close ties that come with blood relatives. Did your relatives reject y'all for being "different"?

[quote] Do they all three get in bed together or do they take turns?

Only when the heat goes out and OP stupidly turns on the air conditioner instead. And then can’t turn it off and one of OP’s roommates has to go to work early in the morning!

^Ha! Yes, I can see OP doing that.

Let's face it, OP is limited.

I'm fine as long as Harry Weston and his two annoying daughters and intrusive dog don't live next door. As long as the ditzy roommate doesn't start dating the cheese man.

Gay community for elders would be great, but I need privacy, too, that’s why own flat or house would be a must.

^Sometimes, in the interest of economizing, we have to give up our "musts."

Tasteful friends... I have your solution in County Longford, Ireland. A 13-bedroom country house that dates from about 1750 with large catering facilities in a separate wing (event income potential) and handsome gardens, for €1,1M.

There are 13 bedrooms, each with en suite bath; only one or two have a properly separate sitting room, though six or seven have a loft mezzanine or second floor space. There are five or six public spaces, sitting rooms, a breakfast room. The L-shaped catering wing has a reception/bar, restaurant, large kitchen, and another dining area/bar. There is also a small two-storied "cottage/store" which looks to have been used for garden things and storage (the light stuccoed building in the center right, framed by a "U" of the house.

There is a knot garden and a Japanese teahouse with garden (of course), all set in beautiful, partly walled grounds, and with Longford seen in the background.

€1,1M / 13 is only €85K per bedroom, but obviously you would need at least twice that upfront just to purchase (€170K/$200K as founding members, say) and make some provision for long-term funding as well and some monthly maintenance fee.

Not for everybody, but not, I wouldn't say, the worst idea in the world.

[quote] with large catering facilities

That’ll be a big help for our baconlettuceandpotato sandwiches.

Do they have a pool? That'll be in the clincher. Sophia mentions in one episode that their house is the only one on the block without a pool, but in the Empty Nest backdoor pilot, Dorothy berates the annoying Joe Isuzu guy for showing up at her house on New Year's Eve and throwing up in the pool. So which is it?

I hated Dr Johnathan Newman. I wanted to call him names like troll or asshole.

[quote] His intent is to sell it as condos to his gay friends so that in the end it will be a completely gay building.

Cool idea, R33,. But you should tell your friend to be low key about it, because that violates housing discrimination laws.

[quote] Do they have a pool? That'll be in the clincher. Sophia mentions in one episode that their house is the only one on the block without a pool, but in the Empty Nest backdoor pilot, Dorothy berates the annoying Joe Isuzu guy for showing up at her house on New Year's Eve and throwing up in the pool. So which is it?

r71 Do you have these shows on VHS?

R69 Looks wondeful! Tasteful and big enough to be together when you want or stay in your room, when you want be alone.

OP, get a $1 house in a quaint Italian village and live your dream. Then you will your own stories for those late night cheesecake noshes!

Oh, Dorothy honey, we don't do fixer-uppers. But a handy man might be handy.

Before Sophia unexpectedly moved in, was Blanche going to rent out that fourth bedroom? Or was that Coco's? Was it established that he was a live-in? Rose referred to him as a gay cook in the pilot. That doesn't sound live-in to me. The bigger issue is why Blanche, a wealthy widow, was renting out rooms to strangers to begin with.

Picture it - Palm Springs!

Well, for your budget, perhaps Cathedral City.

[quote] OP, get a $1 house in a quaint Italian village and live your dream. Then you will your own stories for those late night cheesecake noshes!

And you can waddle down to the grotto in the afternoon to service all the married Italian men!

OP = Rose Nylund and can barely afford to scrape by in St Olaf. Her “savings” is really the piggy bank her grandmother gave her. It’s full of pennies and she thinks she’s rich.

OP wants to sit in the tub in an inch of water?

For me it would be a nightmare living with roommates, regardless how much I enjoyed their company. I prefer having control when I have company. It's difficult enough living with someone you love in a committed relationship. I have lived alone for several years now and prefer it that way. Thankfully I can afford to do so. The next person who lives with me will be to take care of me when I'm physically unable to do so on my own. Of course I'll find someone who is easy on the eyes and has a pleasant personality.

Sorry, no cheesecake for me at 2:00 a.m.

I've never lived with another person since I graduated from college in 1974, and I don't intend to start now!

^^^^ Frieda Claxton

Lots of extremely anti-social Freda Claxton types on this thread.

r78: "Dorothy, you can't pass up a chance to own real estate. It's been a lifesaver for me. You get a bunch of saps to pay your mortgage for you every month while your equity just rises higher and higher, while those poor suckers... [pauses and notices Dorothy, Sophia and Rose all glaring at her] ...What I meant was, it's a great opportunity to make new friends."

Try shacking up with Kim Fung-Toi or Cindy Lou Peeples first.

R78 My partner and I stayed at a condo in San Juan, PR, right on the beach, on the seventh floor, incredible views out to sea. It was cheap, $900 a week, and as many as five people could sleep there easily. The owner, who lived in Boston, wanted to sell and asked us if we were interested. I asked what the price was. $130,000! For that view and in that location! I'm still kicking myself for not buying it. Rentals could have covered the mortgage. It just seemed like it would be a huge headache. And it would probably be the only place we would travel to as long as we owned it.

I would to have a lanai just to be able to use the word "lanai" in a sentence. I'm a super-straight acting/jock type who doesn't really set off gaydars, so if I were to use that in a sentence, I would def give myself away.

^^^ We Eldergays in the south use the word 'Florida Room'. It is unisexual, but tasteful.

I always thought the girls would live in constant terror of being raped and murdered in their beds by a sex serial killer Blanche brought home from one of her dive bars.

Sex killers were becoming a big news story in the 80s.

R92 you’re stupid

*winks at r90*

r91 NOTHING with the word "Florida" in it is tasteful.

[quote] I would LOVE to LIVE like the GOLDEN GIRLS!

So in your declining years you want to end up selling your home to run some cheap rundown hotel and work your ass off?

They're trigger happy in that house. I got shot and put in prison just for stealing Gino's pizza rolls.

Not only that, r97, my vase got shot!

They shot my vase!

R96 how the hell did they leverage a perfectly nice but pretty ordinary house into buying that hotel? Did someone die?!

R99 Blanche basically conned the other women to paying her mortgage for the entire time they were together.

I betting shady Sophia who could look the other way when her relatives pushed priests out of windows ("That's business!") had one of hers to blackmail one of Blanche's guys (she slept with several high powered dudes including a governor that blacked out her true age & several city councilmen) in order to get that hotel.

A third option is that they went back on "Grab That Dough" & made a killing on it the second time around.

Wasn't Stan still rich when the show ended from his potato business? If so maybe he was a silent partner in the deal (he did adore Sophia as a second mother based on his counseling sessions).

They milked Getty for all she was worth, even though she got more and more terrible with each passing season. I was watching season 5 GG ep the other night, and her acting and timing are downright atrocious. Wasn't she brought onto a declining Empty Nest after CBS dumped Golden Palace?

I adored all four ladies but there's a few instances where Estelle was telegraphing the punch and throwing the timing way off

R35 and R36, I was also working in Saudi Arabia (Embassy and Consulates) during the '80s and '90s. Did we know each other then? :)

R32, what a nice story, illustrating that it's bad to be the last to go. At least she fell in love!

I don't believe that any but very close and loving family or stable romantic partners can share housing without it devolving into hell. When money and property enter the picture, humans get weird very quickly. The Golden Girls is pure fantasy and that's probably what we like about it.

Do you think any of the girls were ever late with their rent? What did Blanche say to them?

I would love to be roommates with Celia Rubenstein. She loved all mankind.

[quote] Do you think any of the girls were ever late with their rent? What did Blanche say to them?

Bitch, you better pony up! I’ve got a date with Ham tonight.