“For those who have lost their father ….”

OP, I"m so you'r ein so much pain,

I lost my dad at 5; my mother at 57.

It sucked for her to be without him for so long; I loathe all the happy father's day posts, knowing I can never have it.

I'd PAY for it. if fucking Bruce Boxlietner (Sp?) or NIck Nolte would rent themselves out for a dad for the day, I'd pay them whatever they wanted so I could lie to myself that I hadn't gotten such a raw hand in life.

I wish you peace.

"I'm sorry you're in so much pain."

[quote]For those who have lost their father

I always find this to be such an insipid comment. I didn't lose my father, he died six years ago. Why do we have to tap dance around everything?

were you an adult when your dad died, Jeez?

maybe it's 'more' of a loss when you lose a parent when you're really young

Bad Fathers..

R3 Because its fun.

Apparently you're so triggered that you linked to something someone else wrote just to pretend to be outraged by it

I’m with you OP. I had bad parents who are dead and I am perfectly fine with other people celebrating mother/father day.

I’m gathering myself!

...fathering myself...

OP - bitch, you are mega triggered. Love my dad - got him a card and a bottle of Dewars White Label, his favourite.

R10, glad you have yours; I found some old family films that'd been transferred to video tape; dads always manned the camera so there's scarce footage of him on screen but I found a shot of him holding me when I'm like 3 or 4

I treasure those frames

Honestly I hate all of those tear jerker social media posts about dead parents, be it Mother's or Father's Day or Happy Birthday in heaven or whatever. It kind of pisses on people enjoying their day with loved ones, and its a bit of a stab in the gut to those of us who've lost our own parents. You're just going about your day scrolling, the next you're tearing up because of some twat having to get attention because you're reminded of your own loss.

Social media is an endless rotation of people reminding you that it's their birthday (with suggested charities.) The 3rd anniversary of adopting rescue dog Kodaka II with a reminder that the original and much beloved Kodaka passed over the rainbow bridge 4 years ago now. The 17th anniversary of a parent's death and can it really have been 23 years ago that a maternal grandfather left this mortal coil? The uncle who always had a smile on his face who died when the poster was 11. Father's day a celebration of a dead biological parent never known and an adoptive parent who is dead too. There's the cryptic message about the high school friend "gone XX years on this day" but not so cryptic that the reader can't surmise suicide.

Add to that a load or nonsense about celebrity deaths that hit hard and that instant where you wonder if there's an appropriate emoticon and then just scroll by as if you didn't see it. Others, though, soak this stuff up like a sponge and always have a few trite words — and a big hug!

Am I cold and cruel for not having a long list of dead people to remember and share with my 1839 friends (thanks, Google Calendar!) or am I kind in sparing them the burden of having to scroll rapidly past photos of dead people they're never met and never will do? Google Calendar doesn't remind me of and social media doesn't remind my friends of because I never thought to make it a personal day of remembrance for the rest of my days. For fuck's sake, when did death days become so much more important than birthdays when it comes to remembering people? But then none of my friends and family are Kennedys.