I feel so bad this evening

She is a horrible person and IF what she has is in fact shingles, she got it from being a mean-assed bitch to her friends.

She was telling you that you are full of shit. Your good wishes are empty. Everyone has your number.

Your typing doesn't prove otherwise. Fuck off you nasty troll.

I'm glad OP gave us so much backstory to work with!

#TeamShingles

OP, everyone hates you and knows that god created you to be beacon of darkness in the light.

You both sound lovely.

This is an ESP but makes for great bathroom scrolling.

She has your number OP, you heathen cunt!!

Maybe next time don’t salt her lawn.

Excuse me, EST

OP and Shingles Frau deserve each other for attention-seeking and belief in invisible friends.

I just had a new roof installed, and now I'm annoyed they didn't even bother to offer me shingles on my pussy and asshole.

you have to be like 60 to get shingles

Well I for one am on your side. Cunt deserved shingles and needs to get some shingles on her nasty ass sassy mouth. She should have been grateful for your offer-phony as it was- for prayers. Bitch had a nerve to call you out for your shallow and meaningless post while she is suffering the agony of shingles pain. Some people have no decency. OP, hang in there and accept my heartfelt prayers.

I’ve known people who have had shingles in their 20s R11. Maybe the shingles fairy will visit you sometime soon courtesy of COVID stress.

Since prayers are figurative, they go/don’t go [italic]further[/italic]. Not farther.

OP, honey, I am not confident you understand how shingles "work" if you think she developed shingles by being a mean-assed bitch to her friends. However, that's okay; I love you anyway. Come sit over here and lay your head on my chest while I hold ya a little & run my fingers through your hair.

Ask your friend why Jesus decided to give her Chickenpox AND Shingles?

Maybe God hates her?

0/10

Oh, dear. Shingles is the viral infection, not the resulting rash. So it's not something you can get on a pussy or an asshole.

R15 stress doesn’t activate shingles in people? I obviously know next to nothing about it.

R18 she’s got red sores on her torso.

Is this you, OP?

OP is the stereotype of the fag, a toxic hypocrit. Everybody knows you're a hater, as she knew, too.

Save your fakeass prayers and go get fisted somewhere

Shingles can be WHAAAAT??

R22 I hope your house burns to the ground on Xmas eve you shitbag.

I’m sorry for that reply r22. It really pissed me off but you do not deserve that fate.

Kill yourself OP, the world doesn't need your kind.

Someone should inform her that what she actually has is herpes.

I am not OP or OP's former friend, but I just go the first of two shingles vaccines this week. My arm is sore but I sure as shit do not want shingles anywhere, ever.

She was fishing for attention, (shingles at 35? She's got the clap) then decided to take issue with your well wishes? F her. You didn't come for a debate on religion. You wished her well. Now, I'm sure you wish her something else!

I'm shingle.

I wonder why she made up shingles, and didn't go for Fibromyalgia...which is the go-to for crazy women her age who want sympathy and attention?

OP, may I steal this to use in my Christmas cards this year?

“I hope you get shingles on your pussy and asshole. Merry Xmas.”

-44/10

I love you OP.

Is your friend Jewish OP? "Your prayers don’t go up any farther than the ceiling" sounds like a Jewish comeback, like something Doris Finsecker's mother would say.

“Shingles doesn’t care.”

R19 Op, stress is not the cause of shingles but it can activate it - you are on the right track. Don't listen to these hopeless ninnies. They would probably tell you to spray Easy-Off up your gash because they heard that the vagina is "self -cleaning like an oven."

If she gets shingles on her pussy, it's gonna really STINK! And it will be your fault, OP.

- Cheryl

OP you should inform this broad that if God was real she would have never been infected with Shingles and then you should have told her you do no associate with the otherwise diseased.

You gave yourself away by the fourth word. No one under 40 uses Facebook, OP.

Well I’m kind of trigger happy with my anger outbursts today. Probably because I got up at 3 AM. Ugh!

Shingles is, of course, caused by a reactivation of the varicella virus that causes chickenpox. There are studies suggesting chronic, daily, high stress can trigger a shingles flare due to the affects of stress on our immune systems. That said, if OP's friend relishes in being a mean-assed bitched to her friends, I doubt it causes her much stress and would be unlikely to trigger shingles. As mentioned upthread, you very much do not have to be 60+ to develop shingles. Technically, anyone who has had chickenpox could have a reactivation of the varicella virus at any time.

R18 This reads so fucking funny:

[quote]Oh, dear. Shingles is the viral infection, not the resulting rash. So it's not something you can get on a pussy or an asshole.

So matter of fact with the subtlest shades of impatience and irreverence. 😂

R42 Why the glaring? We all agree with you, love. Drink your shingle juice, Shelby.

[quote]Drink your shingle juice, Shelby.

Oh, shit! 🤣

Get a blog, OP

Oh, okay. My bad. Come here, R37/R44, let me hug you and fondle your balls, please.

But wait a tick, R44. You said in R37, in response to R19, which was replying to my first post at R15, "Don't listen to these hopeless ninnies." I'll need clarification before I can decide if my offer to fondle your balls still stands.

But, who did she vote for?

What an exciting game of telephone! I want you to know that I agree with you in earnest and I'm sorry that you have had to deal with shingles. My only intent was to convey the belief (which you share) that stress can have a hand in the appearance of shingles (via the reasons you described). I still want you to fondle my balls, please. You will need both hands.

Reply 50 is for my boyfriend at R48

Tertiary syphilis can manifest with oozing, open sores similar to shingles. She was mean to you because her brain is being eaten away by spirochetes.

Why be surprised, OP? After all, she is an "old friend" of YOURS.

Aww, you're such a sweet lover, R50. I want us to marry by next September, if possible. No, wait, that's my birthday month. Let's do August. Too hot? You pick! P.S., I've never dealt with shingles personally, just a med professional. I shall now commence fondling your balls with both hands and a little surprise tongue. I wear nitrile gloves most of the day, so my hands are quite soft, too. You're in for a treat!

R53 how delightful! Can we wear matching COVID masks to the wedding? Will I have to convert to a different religion? Lots of details to work out. Surprise tongue and soft hands sound like a winning combo.

OP is fantastic! I love him and his nasty outbursts.

Me too! Big LOL.

R54 We can wear whatever you want, my love. Your wish is my command. I will spend my days striving to make you happy. You never have to convert to another anything, including religion, for me, honey. I was raised Methodist, but I'm fairly agnostic as an adult. Maybe humanist (I'm not even entirely sure what that means)? But let us not worry about all that now, we have time to iron out all those details. For example, are you moving to Pennsylvania or am I coming to you; or, are we starting anew somewhere totally different than our current states? I can find a job absolutely anywhere, because every one needs medical care at some point or another. Let's just bask in the bliss of new love for now. (We totally derailed OP's thread. lol Sorry OP, but love conquers all!)

Why do people make up ridiculous fantasy stories like this?

We all experience esprit de l’escalier at times but there’s no need to bore the rest of us, OP.

R57 A sexy humanist/Methodist ball-fondler/maybe doctor! I'm swooning. Currently, I am in Arizona after having spent my formative years (before getting my degrees) in the Bay Area. I've always wanted to move to Pittsburgh or a smaller town in Pennsylvania in order to purchase a large overgrown manse that I have the intention of restoring with only the finest Bradbury & Bradbury wallpaper and gilded gasoliers (I promise; I am not La Senatrice). I can also work anywhere because we all need cybersecurity (moi). Sorry, OP. We'll get a room.

She has cancer every year or two. This has been the case since I’ve known her (20 years).

R59: Double swooooon!!! I hope I don't disappoint too much, but not a physician, just an N.P. However, I do have a Ph.D. Close enough? Pittsburgh could be do-able. I currently live in the Lancaster suburbs, but there are numerous old mansions within the city & surrounding areas from which we can choose and make a home. I'm not real familiar with architectural styles (I definitely need Vairst Letty's assistance on that), but I'm guessing they are mostly Queen Anne, Georgian and Victorian styles (?). For example, the Roslyn Mansion (see link) on Marietta Avenue or Riverview Tower a/k/a Hershey Mansion (why, I don't know; it's 30 minutes from Hershey) in the Borough of Marietta itself. It's currently a drug & alcohol treatment center for women, but I'll make them an offer they can't refuse if it makes my baby happy! Unfortunately, Lancaster County is solidly red, but the city itself is much more diverse and blue. Even the 15th President of the United States, James Buchanan (previously the worst president in U.S. history; now we know who holds that title), had his Federal-style mansion/estate here. We, of course, cannot buy that one, but we'll find one you love. Anything for my beau! Okay, I think we are (I am) getting carried away on OP's thread, lol. Let's get that room...

R61 The Roslyn Mansion is fantastic! I would love to visit it. Thank you for the link. And that's great you have your Ph.D. You, me, and Vairst Letty need to hop in a rented Chrysler Pacifica minivan (black or navy blue) and hit all these historic areas for a good dose of American history/culture. I am not familiar with the Lancaster suburbs but I will have to get on the Lancaster Grindr and message every single person and ask if they have nitrile ball-fondling gloves; a Cinderella search. #glassslipper #jealousstepsister #princecharming

R62: That sounds like a plan, lover. There are many historical homes & places within Lancaster County to visit, not to mention Pennsilfaanisch Deitsch/PA Dutch "Amish Country" (delicious whoopie pies, shoofly pie, fasnachts, schnitz un kepp, spaetzle, scrapple, ham loaf, apple dumplings, etc.): the Haldemann Mansion, Boettcher House Museum, Hans Herr House/Lancaster Longhouse, Amos Herr Mansion, Johannes Mueller House, Rock Ford Plantation, Wright's Ferry Mansion, the Simon Cameron Estate/Donegal (now the Cameron Estate Inn & Restaurant), the (Thaddeus) Stevens & (Lydia Hamilton) Smith Historic Site/Houses (along with Kleiss Tavern), which were part of the Underground Railroad, etc.

Thaddeus Stevens was a prominent attorney and PA Member of the House of Representatives and a leader of the Radical Republicans (akin to modern day liberal Democrats/Progressives). He is also the namesake and in a roundabout way founder, through a bequest to his nephew, of Thaddeus Stevens College of Technology. His longtime housekeeper (and suspected domestic partner/common-law wife), the prominent businesswoman (after Stevens' death in 1868), Lydia Hamilton Smith, was one-quarter African-American, but with the one-drop rule in the 1840s-60s, their relationship would have been scandalous.

Simon Cameron was the 26th United States Secretary of War in President Abraham Lincoln's cabinet and a 3x U.S. Senator from PA, plus U.S. Minister to Russia. His son, J. Donald Cameron, was likewise a U.S. Senator from PA and the 32nd Secretary of War in President Ulysses S. Grant's administration.

An hour & a half from Lancaster is Gettysburg with its battlefield and many historic sites, including President Dwight D. Eisenhower's farm, which served as his weekend presidential retreat, hosting world leaders & dignitaries, and also became Mamie & his permanent home after his presidency, upon vacating the White House. Also an hour & a half from Lancaster (this time southeast whereas Gettysburg is southwest) is the King of Prussia Mall, the third largest mall in the U.S. (for many years it was second, behind Mall of America, until American Dream in NJ opened last year). And then, of course, Philadelphia. The City of Brotherly Love. The city in which our Nation was founded (and was, for a time, the U.S. Capital during the Revolution). Benjamin Franklin's house, Franklin Court; the Liberty Bell; the Philadelphia Museum of Art; The (Albert C. ) Barnes Foundation; Independence Hall; Carpenters' Hall; Edgar Allan Poe House; Congress Hall; H.S.H. Princess Grace of Monaco's (Grace Kelly) childhood home/mansion; The University of Pennsylvania (my alma mater) and the list goes on. I love history, too, so we will be very happy exploring.

OP: Do you feel better now that my future husband and I have fallen in love in *your* thread? You did that, buddy! Many thanks, you sweetheart. And fuck that friend of yours (not literally), the cunt!

-99/100

r62 = r63

Um, no, R65. You may want to get your "Ignored" list stalking software updated, because it's very incorrect.

OP's prayers smell like farts and no ceiling can contain them.

I liked "ESP," r8.

R30, finally a well placed Liza.

Op, I have a pussy on my shingles. Please pray for me.

she now reports it's hives and not shingles! lmao!

She sailed at the dawning

All day I've been blue

Red sores on her torso

I'm trusting in you

I’m staying home and eating hot cakes today.

OP, how do you go from praying to wishing disease on a pussy in 2.5 seconds?

This thread has everything...

1) couples “meeting cute”

2) profanity

3) awful neighbors

4) song parodies

5) misogyny

6) Liza

R63 Good day, my love! Thank you so much for all the wonderful insight! I will have to take a screenshot and look everything up slowly to absorb. Gettysburg has always been a place that I have wanted to visit. I am also interested in all those mansions you listed and Amish country. Maybe we can get take a romantic ride in a carriage along a busy road. I hope you have a great day at the hospital/ball-fondling.

That is one grouchy looking cat R70

OH GOD HELP ME! I have hives on my pussy!!!

Fuck, there's a pussy on my hives!

R78 & R79 made me laugh... First time in days!

OP, where has all your laughter gone? Do you currently have a woman in your life that you enjoy spending time with? Or a man? Give me the deets. I am listening.

I guess it’s a good things she has shingles then

R83 she says it’s hives now.

R76: Is this thread still in your watched list, ma petite fleur? If so, are you actively monitoring it whenever there is a new reply, excitedly anticipating the reply is from me? I surely hope so. Unless, alternatively and devastatingly, you have completely forgotten about me, my love. If you do, indeed, see this post, I hope you didn't fear too much that I had forgotten about you since I am only now replying to your post at R76 five days late(r). I could never forget you, my beau and my boo; my baby and my babe; my BAE, as the kids say. Sei la mio bellezzo e il mio amore, sempre e per sempre (no clue if that is syntactically correct and/or proper, but this is the DL, after all, so I am more than sure a native or fluent Italian speaker will be along shortly to correct my imbecility. Then again, for all I know at this point, my darling, perhaps that person is you: do you speak Italian?) A little more French: Laissez-nous baiser immédiatement, s'il vous plaît! Je vous remercie.

I must say, Arizona is sounding and looking mighty fine & fucking juicy right about now (that is a favorite expression of my Mother, particularly in reference to our dog(s) when we were kids; e.g., "Sammy, you're looking mighty fine & fucking juicy today, my boy!" Not even kidding, haha. She's an odd bird, but we enjoy her...mostly!). The reason Arizona sounds great right now: my area of Pennsylvania--again south-central; the Susquehanna (River) Valley--received a bit of a nor'easter today: the last time I looked out the window, it had finally stopped snowing, bringing our total accumulation to, approximately, 8 inches, perhaps 10"+ in some surrounding areas (the snow, perverts!) The silver lining was the fact that my clinic closed early yesterday afternoon at 2 pm and Thursday is my normal day off, so...score! I hope you are, have been and will remain well, my darling boy. Take care.

Oh! P.S., One more thing: you said after referencing Amish Country, "maybe we can get take a romantic ride in a carriage along a busy road." Do you mean an Amish horse & buggy? I'm sorry, sweetheart, for that is where I must draw the line and put my size 13 foot down! I have never taken a horse & buggy ride nor do I have any desire to. Ask anyone who lives in an area with an Amish population: it is a special "joy" having the Amish among "the English," on our same roads. Allow me to illustrate: On a beautiful Sunday afternoon, you're out for a drive in your 2019 Mercedes-Benz S-Class S560e Sedan, cruising at a reasonable 10 MPH over the speed limit, down T-484/Paradise Lane through Paradise, or on PA-340/Old Philadelphia Pike through Intercourse or Bird-In-Hand, or down PA-772 through Ronks (all within Lancaster County and a few of the towns where the Amish populations are highest), when you go around a curve, or reach the apex of a small incline, and you are suddenly met with a horse & buggy in your lane (granted, almost always off to the right hand side, not smack in the middle of the lane, but it often doesn't make much difference) going 10-15 MPH in a 45 MPH speed zone. If, nightmarishly, there is also a vehicle in the oncoming lane, then there is a not-insignificant chance somebody is going to die. Often, unfortunately, the horse, too. No thank you, darling. Fuck horse & buggies right up the asshole to hell! Other than that little detail, we shall find many historical and fun places to explore together. Okay, that's enough for now. Hit me back, bitch! (said only with love, lol)

Bringing people together, that's what Facebook is all about!

[quote] I hope you get shingles on your pussy and asshole. Merry Xmas.

OP, I laughed so hard when I saw that response, literally out loud. It's so awful, bitchy, and you are keeping it real. I needed a good laugh.

Real life is sometimes funny. Lol

OP, your thread introduced me to who, I thought, was the love of my life; my soulmate; my better half. However, it now seems he has forgotten about, and abandoned, me completely. So...how you doin', big daddy? Wanna be my rebound, you beautiful, vengeful sexpot? I'll prescribe her some topical triamcinolone cream for her hives, but in reality, we'll replace it with capsaicin. And then we will point & laugh as her pussy burns like hell fire. Who knows, maybe it will even fall off?

R88 I’m single and free. HMU!!

OP: If you still have this thread on your watch-list, do we have any updates on the state of your friend's pussy & rosebud which you cursed? I have been super worried about her and her delicate cooter & hiney hole. Hell, it ruined my Christmas, because I was so preoccupied worrying that your friend would develop shingles, later hives, on her dainty snatch & starfish. More importantly, did she ever apologize for being a massive, gaping, malodorous, gangrenous cunt to you with her shitty comments in response to your sincerity?

In other news, R89/OP, I would still like to tickle your taint with my tongue, please. You sound hot, young & hopefully hung. Am I close?

Is she fat? Maybe it’s cellulitis. On a scale of Karen Carpenter to Chrissy Metz how fat is this bitch?

All I know is she has hives AND her heat is off because her landlord is having a new heating system installed in her apt building today. She’s to be without heat for 8 hrs. She reports on FB that she is wearing her coat, hat and gloves inside her (grungy) apartment. I’m glad she’s inconvenienced. It’ll teach the bitch to be thankful for basic utilities!

Has anyone complimented OP's grammar?

I felt bad for 4 days so today I took a Benzo and feel more chill. I think I'll take them for a couple days. I've taken Benzos for years. Just a couple, very couple of months. It helps kick me out of a funk.

Better living through chemistry, OP.

I can't solve the things that made me feel bad. But getting frozen in inaction and bad feelings doesn't help the situation. Need to reset the way you think about situations that get you down.

It is not a big deal OP. It doesn't worth upsetting. Would it make you feel better to know that we are all praying her shingles will get to her pussy and make it stink?

Well, you proved her right.

To tell you the truth I rarely think about her pussy!

With those people you wished their house would burn down to the ground on Xmas eve - did it burn down OP?

Shit on ya!

I feel like shit tonite and I’m lonely AF.

Eat my ass. It’ll help.

Can I eat your ass, mister? I’m so bored and lonely! It’s so cold and snowy outside.

r11, 50

Shingles doesn’t care.