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Non-Binary Child

Today Tamron Hall interviewed a woman from Utah who has raised her child "Zoomer" with no reference to gender. After the birth if anyone asked if it was a boy or girl, she'd say it was a baby. The kid decided whatever clothes they wanted and played with all kinds of toys. Mom didn't want to impose anything as far as gender identification. The father agreed with this. Today the kid is five and has decided if they're a boy or girl, but the mother wouldn't reveal the answer. How do you feel about a parent treating their child like social experiment?

by Anonymousreply 46October 11, 2020 4:12 AM

I feel these threads are beyond tired. I also question whether or not a majority of the core gay DLers are even parents, or even interested in how others raise their children.

by Anonymousreply 1September 29, 2020 12:10 AM

[quote] How do you feel about a parent treating their child like social experiment?

I hope it works out better for them than the experiment your parents conducted by dropping you head-first on the floor repeatedly.

by Anonymousreply 2September 29, 2020 12:13 AM

I fear what will happen if the child chooses the gender he or she was born with.

by Anonymousreply 3September 29, 2020 12:16 AM

Obviously the kid's choice will make the world go boom.

by Anonymousreply 4September 29, 2020 12:20 AM

Too tedious.

Sexual identity/gender issues are rare enough that going with our society's norms of assignment in an easy, relaxed way without pushing "masculine" or "feminine" stereotypes seems safe. A parent can adjust if the child manifests any divergence.

It's easy to say this is different from straight/gay/whatever issues, but it's not, really. Let kids ask their questions, play and discover, try on different hats and shoes, and stop making such a fucking wasp nest of the nursery, Mommy and Daddy.

by Anonymousreply 5September 29, 2020 12:22 AM

What's so bad about not pushing your kids towards certain kind of toys? Unclench, OP.

I bet you prefer the right-wing parents who beat the shit out of their sons for "acting gay"

by Anonymousreply 6September 29, 2020 12:26 AM

R3 this is probably why the mother wouldn't tell us.

by Anonymousreply 7September 29, 2020 12:28 AM

Since OP didn’t include a link, I have.

Personally, I think parents who do this are attention whores, and I feel bad for the child. This goes well beyond the usual “free to be” of the usual liberal parent. The mom, Kyl, is obviously looking for publicity and will be milking this for a long time.

Poor Zoomer. I hope s/he can come through it okay.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 8September 29, 2020 12:29 AM

The thing is leading by example will always be labeled as an attention whore move or stunt by the opposition, because that's all they got.

by Anonymousreply 9September 29, 2020 12:43 AM

The parents who do this are causing hardship for their children.

by Anonymousreply 10September 29, 2020 12:53 AM

As this is not based on sexuality, how is this parent refusing to make an assumption about her child’s gender?

Has a penis = boy No penis = girl

by Anonymousreply 11September 29, 2020 1:01 AM

R9, that’s bullshit.

These parents are making a MUCH bigger deal about gender stereotypes than any regular Joe parents. “Zoomer, you like cars and skateboards? You must be a boy!” “Zoomer baked Funfetti cupcakes. She must be a girl!”

The fuck. If Zoomer is a born female and likes cars and skateboards and wants to be a “girl” will that stupid cunt’s head explode?!

Because if they had an Olivia who liked skateboards and deep sea fishing, she’d just be a regular girl and Mommy wouldn’t get the attention she needs.

by Anonymousreply 12September 29, 2020 1:22 AM

Maybe DCFS can decide on the gender!

by Anonymousreply 13September 29, 2020 1:24 AM

[quote] These parents are making a MUCH bigger deal about gender stereotypes than any regular Joe parents.

And you make it a MUCH bigger deal about it, too for some reason. Why do parents raising their child bother you so much? Are you even a parent?

by Anonymousreply 14September 29, 2020 1:24 AM

In 400 years, people will view this the way we now view the Salem Witch Trials.

Actually, maybe even less than 400. I think China's gonna take over pretty soon (maybe within 10 years even) and they're gonna use stuff like this as justification of the decadence and decline of American culture. And they'll have a point.

by Anonymousreply 15September 29, 2020 1:25 AM

Forget about choosing a gender. They need to let the poor kid choose a decent name. Zoomer?!

by Anonymousreply 16September 29, 2020 1:34 AM

I'm sorry but how many of you assholed complained that you weren't allowed to play with the toys you wanted to play with when you were a kid because they weren't gender appropriate? How many of you had to sneak behind your parents backs to play with Barbies or Tonka Trucks or what have you, and wished your parents had just not been such assholes about it.

And now, you're the assholes because of :

T R A N S !

Any excuse so you can be shit heels.

by Anonymousreply 17September 29, 2020 1:53 AM

Our daily [bold]#TrannyPanic[/bold] thread.

by Anonymousreply 18September 29, 2020 2:14 AM

r17, but it’s okay to “choose” a child’s gender based on which toys and activities and colors it gravitates toward?

How does the child decide? What if it likes wearing a camo jacket and pink Mary Janes while shooting hoops and then taking a big bubble bath? Is it a boy or a girl?

WHY is this Kyl person (sorry, I didn’t catch their “pronouns”) teasing the big reveal about this kid’s sex and gender? I didn’t watch the whole thing, so I don’t know what Zoomer is.

Poor kid.

by Anonymousreply 19September 29, 2020 2:30 AM

Parents pushing their gender obsessions on their kids never ends well. I am a parent. For the first few years, it was easy to allow our son the space to be whoever he wanted - we pointed out cars and planes with him as a baby, painted his nails and did dress ups with his big sister, played with dolls, trucks and all sorts. He was never told certain behaviours, toys, or modes of expression were inappropriate for him as a boy. Despite all of that, within ten days of starting at kindergarten, he was coming home and telling US what behaviours were appropriate for boys and girls. Kids get a lot of their socialisation from their peers and their peers repeat whatever shit their own parents believe.

Zoomer's mum can try her hardest but unless she's bringing them up in a vacuum, Zoomer is going to encounter gendered socialisation sooner or later. I get the impression this is more about Zoomer's mom than Zoomer anyway.

by Anonymousreply 20September 29, 2020 2:57 AM

Children should be told in a very sensible, matter-of-fact way which SEX they are, and then be told immediately after that it means absolutely NOTHING about their character, interests, or personality traits. Yes, it really is that simple (if you're not an attention whore exploiting your child for Twitter/Instagram points).

by Anonymousreply 21September 29, 2020 2:58 AM

I’m not terribly interested in other people’s children.

by Anonymousreply 22September 29, 2020 3:34 AM

Remember when we bitched about "indigo children?" That seems like a walk through the garden compared to non-binary children. It's sad that some parents need to raise the most [italic]special[/italic] children.

by Anonymousreply 23September 29, 2020 3:44 AM

I think the child chose their biological gender. If they chose to be trans the morher woild proudly reveal that.

by Anonymousreply 24September 29, 2020 3:49 AM

It's the 1950's all over again. They are raising a generation of serial killers.

by Anonymousreply 25September 29, 2020 3:55 AM

R24 nailed it.

by Anonymousreply 26September 29, 2020 6:09 AM

What would Dr. Benjamin Spock have to say about this?

by Anonymousreply 27September 29, 2020 10:36 AM

If God was real Tamron Hall & her idiot husband would have both been born sterile.

by Anonymousreply 28September 29, 2020 10:39 AM

When I was at Cornell in the early 90s, there was a well-known psych professor who did this with his child. It did not turn out well. Can’t remember his name but the child resented it horribly.

by Anonymousreply 29September 29, 2020 10:47 AM

Why can't people just let their children be who they are? If your boy likes playing with dolls, let him. If your girl likes playing with trucks, let her. They're still boys and girls, they just aren't conforming to your gender expectations. Re-labeling your boy as a girl or your girl as a boy or either as non-binary because their likes and dislikes aren't what you expected is crazy.

by Anonymousreply 30September 29, 2020 11:48 AM

I’m annoyed with my friends for naming their baby Benjy. What if He turns out gay and all the other gay boys are Richards and Thomases and Williams and he’s stuck with a nickname?

by Anonymousreply 31September 29, 2020 12:08 PM

I a female who was raised that way in the 1960s. I loved cowboy shows, I loved swimming and bike riding. Hated dresses because 1) you could get your legs cut up climbing trees 2) they were not good in cold weather. My sports minded mother entered me in every sport. Today I'm a well adjusted person who is fit and trim and still very active. My sister, who is completely different, was allowed to choose her own way.

I see friends enforcing ultra femme shit on their daughters, it's very limiting. For instance, one of them has a 6 year old girl who is active and competitive, yet she always puts her in ballet or some girly activity. The child would excel in sports and built much needed self esteem for someone so young. What are these gender role enforcement parents afraid of? Or are they just repeating what their mother did with them?

by Anonymousreply 32September 29, 2020 12:18 PM

Take a stroll down the "girls' toys" and "boys' toys" aisles in a department store. If you don't feel like puking, you should.

But parents like this one are only reinforcing the importance of "gender" when they should be simply telling their kids it's bullshit and leaving it at that.

by Anonymousreply 33September 29, 2020 2:50 PM

Assuming the parents have genders and that the child was exposed to other people outside the home, there are still gender influences.

I think the world is becoming more and more gendered in some ways despite its efforts to counter that. in the 70s, when I was a kid, it felt a lot less gendered.

by Anonymousreply 34September 29, 2020 2:54 PM

I always wonder what their pediatricians have to say. I’m a parent and our kid’s doctor is in the most liberal part of NYC. Basically everything the pediatrician has told us since birth has been gendered. Height, weight, basic needs, hygiene—all of it has been based on data involving average boy/girl development. I feel like she would tell me to see another doctor if I suggested the child were neither.

by Anonymousreply 35September 29, 2020 2:58 PM

The only problem with this is that it's a news item. Don't tell the kid's genitals but tell the world of this decision? It's a private matter. Plenty of "social experimenting" in the form of inculcating kids with religion and bigotry so this kid will probably avoid the confusion of being raised by parents who go around hating groups of people. I wish the kid the best. Why tell the world, though?

by Anonymousreply 36September 29, 2020 2:59 PM

The mother is a fucking attention whore who needs to die in a grease fire.

The father has no balls and should accompany his wife in said grease fire. Well scratch that, he'll probably go with her willingfully.

It won't end well for the kid. 5 years old kids shouldn't be concerned with that gender bullshit. The mother probably expected the kid to go full trans and get a fucking reality show out of it.

by Anonymousreply 37September 29, 2020 3:11 PM

ZOOMER? The kid has more problems than deciding a gender.

by Anonymousreply 38September 29, 2020 5:47 PM

R35- Such as a psychiatrist.

by Anonymousreply 39September 29, 2020 5:48 PM

My ex- and I raised our child, It, as hexadecimal. We were shocked to find out that hexadecimal was not non-binary. So we didn't raise our second child (which has no pronouns and no description) the same way.

by Anonymousreply 40October 9, 2020 11:57 PM

You gals are always so tedious with your hysterical obsession.

We are never going to join you in hating and fearing transgender people. Not happening.

Here, have a look at the funniest transgender in the world. Unclench and have a laugh with a genius, ladies.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 41October 10, 2020 1:15 AM

Oh, please, R41... Even Izzard himself can barely keep a straight face whilst referring to himself as "transgender."

And I guess you didn't get the memo that calling transgender people "transgenders" is kinda... well, transphobic. Hell, I'm gender critical, and I'd never call them that.

by Anonymousreply 42October 10, 2020 2:27 AM

Eddie Izzard is a transgender genius. He's a better human being than you will ever be. He has done more for the world and for the good of the people in it than you will ever do - and he is transgender.

You can't even enjoy humor or laugh like a normal person. That's how low you have fallen because of your hatred and bigotry against transgenders.

This is why people don't like you and you don't have any friends.

by Anonymousreply 43October 10, 2020 2:33 AM

"If gender and sex are two different things, why can't you just tell us if Zoomer has a peen or a poon?"

by Anonymousreply 44October 10, 2020 2:48 AM

He is admittedly a cross-dressing heterosexual man, idiot at R43. A white one, at that; never been oppressed a day in his life.

And just keep calling transgender people "transgenders." Way to be an "ally."

by Anonymousreply 45October 10, 2020 3:13 PM

Anyone who has been living openly as a transvestite for 40 years has been oppressed, you dumb fucking cunt. What planet do you morons live on, anyway?

Oh, my bad - never mind. You're in Donald-world now, with all your right wing, alt-right, transgender-hating, Republican bitch-ass friends. It must feel so slimy and depressing, knowing that's who you're stuck with forever. Decent people, academics, intellectuals, writers, artists, anyone with a normal, liberal view of the world won't touch you and your bigoted kind with a ten foot pole.

Oh sure, you can get a children's author and Milo the Pedophile but everybody who matters shuns you. Actually most people shun you, including those in your own family, don't they? You can't even post on any normal feminist sites. You have to hide yourselves in shame here on a Gay men's website where you are loathed and despised.

Transgenders >>> TERFs

Have a nice day, Miss Vagina 1954.

by Anonymousreply 46October 11, 2020 4:12 AM
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