I Have Never Seen ...

I Have Never Seen ...

1) crude oil straight out of a drill pipe,

2) a morbidly obese woman driving a Corvette,

3) Jon Hamm's dick.

1) an obese Japanese woman 2) the Namib desert 3) the inside of an Eastern Orthodox church

Damn formatting:

1) an obese Japanese woman

2) the Namib desert

3) the inside of an Eastern Orthodox church

I finally went inside one of those onion domed Russian orthodox churches – – they don’t have pews!

For you r2

I never has seen snow.

1. A purple cow.

1. An honest politician

2. An honorable billionaire

3. A decent Republican.

How svelte, r5!

1. A child being born

2. A human fetus in a jar in biology class

3. The Earth from outer space

1. My father's dick

2. The inside of a Women's restroom

3. A bad episode of Reno 911

[post redacted because linking to dailymail.co.uk clearly indicates that the poster is either a troll or an idiot (probably both, honestly.) Our advice is that you just ignore this poster but whatever you do, don't click on any link to this putrid rag.]

... a succesful family thanksgiving , my upstairs neighbors, or snax club @ berghain

1) The Big Bang Theory

2) The inside of a Cheese Cake Factory

3) My boss in the bathroom at work. I don't think he relieves himself.

I have never seen a first lady's pussy. Oh wait.

1. A duckbill platypus

2. Child pornography

3. A live rock concert

I've seen a platypus -- they have blue eyes. Wasn't expecting that!

She cannot be allwoed to reproduce.

R16; A live rock concert.

I have never seen:

1. The great pyramids in person

2. A hurricane hit a coast In person

3. Someone getting shot.

1.The inside of a Chik-fil-A restaurant, or a drive-thru pickup window of one 2. The inside of a Harry Potter novel 3. The inside of a can of Spam

a republican who's not a racist

Bishkek for breakfast

Dushanbe for dinner

the Mongolian steppe

1. A conservative that has even an ounce of empathy for anyone that is an exactly like him/her.

2. Call me by your name

3. A good looking man with waxed, plucked or contoured eyebrows.

Now that I think of it 2 and 3 don’t really count just 1 times 3

Prince Albert of Monaco, Albert Brooks, and the Prince Albert piercing.

1. A woman who was accountable for her actions and wasn’t duplicitous with the ability to quickly be psychotic.

2. A child that wasn’t annoying.

3. A straight man over 45 who isn’t an insecure, pussy-brainwashed douche bag.

Prince Albert in a can

Alberto VO5

Alberta

1. A vagina 2. A conjoined twin 3. The inside of a synagogue

Game of Thrones

A roast pig on a spit

A monster truck show

r27 Fuck you.

An unsatisfied lover.

Gone With the Wind

Casablanca

The Sound of Music

A dead person

CSI (any version)

Childbirth