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Hello Gays. I am First Lady. Tell me your sex question.

I give Best answer!

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 13305/27/2020

How do you make a man with a small penis, and morbidly obese, happy and satisfied? What is your technique?

by Anonymousreply 105/21/2020

Coconut Oil and feets.

Naxt qvestion?

by Anonymousreply 205/21/2020

When you did your lesbian photoshoots, did you enjoy licking out the other woman involved?

by Anonymousreply 305/21/2020

What method do you use to control your herpes outbreaks?

by Anonymousreply 405/21/2020

[quote] When you did your lesbian photoshoots, did you enjoy licking out the other woman involved?

I enjoy making photo graph to pleasure horny man! Licking the vagine is the way to make Him happy.

by Anonymousreply 505/21/2020

Does Donald suck on a binky while you change his adult diaper?w

by Anonymousreply 605/21/2020

[quote] How do you make a man with a small penis, and morbidly obese, happy and satisfied? What is your technique?

To pleasure such a Man, you need bucket like this.

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by Anonymousreply 705/21/2020

[quote] Does Donald suck on a binky while you change his adult diaper?w

Donald wears diaper pull up man panty.

by Anonymousreply 805/21/2020

Virst Leddy. What do you think of Michelle Obama?

by Anonymousreply 905/21/2020

r9 Michele is very Very brave to go in public looking like black lady. I truly admire her sturdy haunches and big white teeth.

by Anonymousreply 1005/21/2020

Do you put a plastic liner underneath the sheets before you piss on the bed?

by Anonymousreply 1105/21/2020

Dear Slovenian Whore:

I am your biggest fan. I loves that you cannot make facial expression. You are best first lady since ever. My questions for you is: How do you makes sex so good you makes men who are not so happy so happy?

Thanks you, Boris (not Russian).

by Anonymousreply 1205/21/2020

r11 I do not know? That is maid job.

by Anonymousreply 1305/21/2020

How do you rim your husband’s disgusting, dirty, fat, orange, cottage cheese ass?

by Anonymousreply 1405/21/2020

It's never lasted more than two minutes. Tops. Am I right?

by Anonymousreply 1505/21/2020

r12 thank you! I love my fannys. To make man so happy, use mouth on penes.

by Anonymousreply 1605/21/2020

What sex are you?

by Anonymousreply 1705/21/2020

[quote] How do you rim your husband’s disgusting, dirty, fat, orange, cottage cheese ass?

That is no job for Lady! Please ask to Jared. He is Man ass man.

by Anonymousreply 1805/21/2020

Why do you live on a different floor if the WH than your ugly, obese husband?

by Anonymousreply 1905/21/2020

When you make sexy with Donald, do you pull on his hair?

by Anonymousreply 2005/21/2020

How does it feel having the whole world know he sticks his little orange stump in you for money?

by Anonymousreply 2105/21/2020

[quote] How does it feel having the whole world know he sticks his little orange stump in you for money?

That was one time. Long ago.

by Anonymousreply 2205/21/2020

[quote] When you make sexy with Donald, do you pull on his hair?

Fancy Lady like myself pull on the hair, on the penes, on the donkey tail, whatever you like.

by Anonymousreply 2305/21/2020

Does he take his diaper off to fuck or just pull it down?

by Anonymousreply 2405/21/2020

We've heard stories about Donald liking the wee wee. What about scat and poo? Since he wears diapers, is scat incorporated into your sex play?

by Anonymousreply 2505/21/2020

No more question about pee pee and poo poo. I am LADY. Fancy Lady does NOT talk about job.

by Anonymousreply 2605/21/2020

Do you view Miss LIndsey a threat to your marriage? She's pretty aggressive, you know?

by Anonymousreply 2705/21/2020

When Miss Lindsey comes near I say, "Shoo, little ladyman" and he runs away like little girl... Tee hee

by Anonymousreply 2805/21/2020

Mister Linzey and me share love of lace thing. Here is collection of modest nipple cover he gave to me for Birthday. Lovely man!

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by Anonymousreply 2905/21/2020

Varist Lady , Do you and first daughter have 3 ways ? Whom Does Donny fuck Varist ?

by Anonymousreply 3005/21/2020

Melania,

Do you currently have or did you once have a penis?

by Anonymousreply 3105/21/2020

How much?

by Anonymousreply 3205/21/2020

How many golden showers did it take it to get your green card? How many to attain First Lady status?

by Anonymousreply 3305/21/2020

Ok gay boys. It is time to put Barron in cage. Then for me the beauty sleep. Good night and sweat dream!

by Anonymousreply 3405/21/2020

Is it easy to deal with Cheeto Man because you are blind? You are always squinting.

by Anonymousreply 3505/21/2020

You WILL NEVER Be First Lady.

by Anonymousreply 3605/21/2020

Dear Vairst Letty,

Please stop copying my homework or one shall go South Side on your filler-injected ass.

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by Anonymousreply 3705/21/2020

Madame First Lady, should I visit Slovenia ?

by Anonymousreply 3805/21/2020

Varist Lady: who has tightest Poussy you or Varist Ivana-Check who ski to freedom? Ask Boaz Mazur, no?

by Anonymousreply 3905/21/2020

Dear Slovenian Whore,

When you press on Donald's perinium, does it put him in delirium.? Does it make his tiddly wink?

Strangely Curious in Kansas

by Anonymousreply 4005/21/2020

Dear First Lady,

Please tell us how Baron was conceived. Did Ivanka eat you out after blowing her father? Or was it Jared? I just can't imagine a fine lady like you allowing the orangutan to put his stubby little thing in you!

by Anonymousreply 4105/21/2020

R40 I stick finger in his (how you say) anal gland hole. It covered in caca after done. We no do that no more!

by Anonymousreply 4205/21/2020

What the fuck are you always squinting at?

by Anonymousreply 4305/21/2020

Are you typing from the WH or Maryland?

by Anonymousreply 4405/21/2020

Clearly she is trying to not see what is next to her in bed. You'd do the same.

by Anonymousreply 4505/21/2020

Do you have a sex robot stunt double? I would.

by Anonymousreply 4605/21/2020

All of the posts signed "Melania" are obvious forgeries because everyone knows the real First Lady can't spell her own name.

by Anonymousreply 4705/21/2020

[quote] All of the posts signed "Melania" are obvious forgeries because everyone knows the real First Lady can't spell her own name.

r47 your words are not very Best. I got teached to spell my name in English.

by Anonymousreply 4805/22/2020

[quote] Clearly she is trying to not see what is next to her in bed.

Next to bed is cage of Barron. I watch carefully that it is locked in the night.

by Anonymousreply 4905/22/2020

Madonna or Janet Jackson?

by Anonymousreply 5005/22/2020

Fake Flotus, Does your contract specify any sexual activity with the orange buffoon or are you only required to perform public appearances?

How long after he leaves office do you have to wait before filing for divorce?

Have you fucked any Secret Service agents? Man or woman?

by Anonymousreply 5105/22/2020

Doo to my kidney problem which is a shy kidney I do not sex man unless I get the money. Donald has no money so no sex for Donald. Ha! Ha!

by Anonymousreply 5205/22/2020

I breastfeed “husband” for 3 years after Barron ruined vageena.

by Anonymousreply 5305/22/2020

Do you charge extra for anal?

by Anonymousreply 5405/22/2020

r54 Yes I do and I advise you to charge extra as well.

by Anonymousreply 5505/22/2020

This thread makes me want to rethink Melania's standing amongst First Ladies. This is fun!

by Anonymousreply 5605/22/2020

Thank you r56! You are fun too. I am not a standing lady. Is true all First Ladys pee. Only Michele pees standing.

by Anonymousreply 5705/22/2020

I bump clams with Ivanka after inauguration as a congratulations gift for daddy. She pull hair! She hard pull hair!

by Anonymousreply 5805/22/2020

Does your husband also wear orange clown makeup on his wiener? If so, do you wash off said wiener before giving him sucky sucky?

by Anonymousreply 5905/22/2020

[quote] Does your husband also wear orange clown makeup on his wiener?

Yes he do.

[quote] If so, do you wash off said wiener before giving him sucky sucky?

All cusstomer must wash. No wash no lick! Is my firm policy which includes Donald.

by Anonymousreply 6005/22/2020

When you get bored during sex with Donald, do you count his fat rolls and chins?

Do you have any other tips for passing the time when forced to endure sex with a morbidly obese?

by Anonymousreply 6105/22/2020

Political troll thread!! Block and FF!!

by Anonymousreply 6205/22/2020

A thread trashing a Slovenian whore deserves a WW, Miss Priss Pants!

by Anonymousreply 6305/22/2020

My beautiful thread keep gets buried

by Anonymousreply 6405/22/2020

Vairst lady what are your thoughts on ATM? Is it appropriate for a lady to do in these troubled times? Any advice is appreciated.

by Anonymousreply 6505/22/2020

Does he call make you wear a blonde wig and call you “Ivanka“ when he is making you poop on his chest?

by Anonymousreply 6605/22/2020

R66 No, we have family bed for 3 of us! Jared sleep with Eric!

by Anonymousreply 6705/22/2020

1st Lady, what about Kellyanne? Are the rumors about Kellyanne true?

by Anonymousreply 6805/22/2020

Malania, do you and Hope Hicks get aloñg?

by Anonymousreply 6905/22/2020

What does Chris Christie eat when he visits the WH?

by Anonymousreply 7005/22/2020

[quote] 1st Lady, what about Kellyanne? Are the rumors about Kellyanne true?

I am sad to tell you yes. Is Very stinky.

[quote] Malania, do you and Hope Hicks get aloñg?

I don't know her.

[quote] What does Chris Christie eat when he visits the WH?

Here is picture of Donald with snack tray for Chris Christie.

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by Anonymousreply 7105/22/2020

When is your whole family going to fuck off and die?

by Anonymousreply 7205/22/2020

@ r65, "Vairst lady what are your thoughts on ATM? "

I love ATM, that's where money comes from

by Anonymousreply 7305/22/2020

Melania, why haven't you poisoned his fat orange ass yet? The world awaits. Do it tonight! Just lace his hydroxychloroquine with a fatal dose of arsenic, he'll never know.

Or load it in his enema, he'll love it!

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by Anonymousreply 7405/22/2020

[R74] No, no, no, no, no! First two word in English learn me are "prenuptial" and "agreement" so I know that I must be waiting for Donald to divorce me, or to die from his natural. Even in my homeland we have autopsy. No, no, no to arsenic!

Does no one know where to buy Polonium?

by Anonymousreply 7505/22/2020

Vairst Leddy, we all know anal is extra. But how much is 'extra'? Thousands of dollars extra? Or, a small private island. in Caribbean extra?

by Anonymousreply 7605/22/2020

My Anal pretty loose r76. It’s like vagena! I give discount!

by Anonymousreply 7705/23/2020

[QUOTE] Vairst Leddy, we all know anal is extra. But how much is 'extra'?

$50 extra if you buy a book of five fuck tickets. (Fifth fuck is on the House).

by Anonymousreply 7805/23/2020

[quote] (Fifth fuck is on the House).

But what about us?

by Anonymousreply 7905/23/2020

Do you have any techniques from your native land of Slovenia for vaginal hygiene that you'd like to share?

by Anonymousreply 8005/23/2020

r80 I recommend you Ocean Fresh Lysol wipes. Make your poosey fresh like ocean! Unlucky for Kelleyanne she smell like ocean but not fresh ocean. For Kelleyanne grade odors I recommend the cleaning powers of the fire.

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by Anonymousreply 8105/23/2020

The Melania responses are more amusing than I anticipated. Good job with your frankness and wit, Melania.

by Anonymousreply 8205/23/2020

I provide coupon code exclusive for Datalounge users! Enter DLMelaniaAnalYeast into the pin pad on my ass before penetrating for 30% discount.

by Anonymousreply 8305/23/2020

[quote]—Horny Male Senators (except Miss Lindsay)

While not as flamboyant & persistent as Miss Lindsay, Mitch & several others would be in Miss Lindsay's camp.

by Anonymousreply 8405/23/2020

I’m just very gassy r43. I no like to hold in for so long!

by Anonymousreply 8505/23/2020

If you had to munch on black vagine, would it be Stacey Abrams or Kamala Harris?

by Anonymousreply 8605/23/2020

R86 Husband no like brown or black people! I have no permission to munch ethnical vagine!

by Anonymousreply 8705/23/2020

[quote] If you had to munch on black vagine, would it be Stacey Abrams or Kamala Harris?

Please! I am not animal. I am lady. No blacks.

by Anonymousreply 8805/23/2020

R88 is Deplorable imposter! I no racist! Husband racist!

by Anonymousreply 8905/23/2020

Kamala Harris, of course. She's so strong and smart, unlike that asshole I married.

by Anonymousreply 9005/23/2020

Melania, does 'Mother' Pence like you? Does she let Mike to talk with other women, even at work?

by Anonymousreply 9105/23/2020

No r89 is imposter. There are many fake Melania in thread. Let me explain. Black people are friendly and good cleaner. But sex is a different thing. I will lick the black poosey if you like but it cost extra.

by Anonymousreply 9205/23/2020

[quote] Melania, does 'Mother' Pence like you?

I cannot say but I doo say this. Mother pence gave me pamphlet. I use pamphlet to line cage of Barron.

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by Anonymousreply 9305/23/2020

2015 troll bury Melania beautiful and informative thread.

by Anonymousreply 9405/23/2020

Melania, you probably have seen or heard something about this. Ivanka may have blabbed. What is the size/shape of Jared's peen?

by Anonymousreply 9505/23/2020

Penes of Jared look like dainty potato. This potato is medium dainty.

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by Anonymousreply 9605/23/2020

Does the Donald lick your pussy? He doesn't seem like he would be a very attentive lover or a giver....

by Anonymousreply 9705/23/2020

Donald does not lick poosey. Uses finger only on the poosey of Hope.

by Anonymousreply 9805/23/2020

[quote] For Kelleyanne grade odors I recommend the cleaning powers of the fire.

Writing this down ...

by Anonymousreply 9905/23/2020

Dear Melania,

What advice do you have for gay men who want to please men as much as you do?

by Anonymousreply 10005/23/2020

I thought Kellyanne was all dust down there....

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by Anonymousreply 10105/23/2020

Any tips for washing out your back door poosey? You are talking to a bunch of gays here, after all.

by Anonymousreply 10205/23/2020

First Floozy, when you and trump have threesomes what is it? Two ladies one man? One lady, two men? Two dwarfs, one lady? All of the above? I bet trump just watches. Am I right?

by Anonymousreply 10305/23/2020

Yes you are right. Donald likes to watch ladys make love to each other. The motto of Donald the more the merryer.

by Anonymousreply 10405/24/2020

[quote] What advice do you have for gay men who want to please men as much as you do?

As profesional architect I study the ways of love in building. I recommend to gay boy to have sex in fancy building. It means your classy and its handy for Mexican lady to clean up after.

by Anonymousreply 10505/24/2020

Today I go to Church. Donald bought me new church dress. Is yellow for the Summertime.

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by Anonymousreply 10605/24/2020

After church I go boom boom then answer more sex questions for you!

by Anonymousreply 10705/24/2020

Mel, it seems a lot of your time is spent cleaning poosey, sexytimes with the Donald and other Johns, and being the best. Do you take any time for self pleasure? Any advice for how to unwind after a long day of whoring?

by Anonymousreply 10805/24/2020

Yes I can tell to you about self pleasure. After long day of work for United States people, I relax in wig room. Brushing the wig, looking at wig make for deep feeling of happyness.

Here are my favorite wig.

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by Anonymousreply 10905/24/2020

And no need for self pleasure, that’s what secret service is for!

by Anonymousreply 11005/24/2020

Melania, this is so perplexing. What was Kellyanne trying to do here?

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by Anonymousreply 11105/24/2020

Kellyanne muting phone before assuming position! Photographs only tell partial story.

by Anonymousreply 11205/24/2020

Here's a question that is on the minds of all DLers:

Does your pussy stink?

by Anonymousreply 11305/24/2020

Silly question! All pooseys stink. That why we are allvays cleaning out with good smelling things!

by Anonymousreply 11405/24/2020

Melania, did you ever incorporate donkeys, ping pong balls, or other performance art into your sexytimes?

by Anonymousreply 11505/24/2020

R113 My pussy smell like rose garden that was fertilized with ground Cheetos and fish sticks. It keeps husband coming back $

by Anonymousreply 11605/24/2020

Mel-, you must have felt very hurt when you heard the stories about Donald's affairs with Karen McDougal and Stormy Daniels. Do you feel better about all this nowadays?

by Anonymousreply 11705/24/2020

Also, a First Lady never say P Word. We say vagine, and we hold pinky out when inserting tampon. It price of being classy First Lady

by Anonymousreply 11805/24/2020

[quote] Melania, did you ever incorporate donkeys, ping pong balls, or other performance art into your sexytimes?

Sadly to say is proprietary secret. But I will tell to you this: the customer is always right.

by Anonymousreply 11905/24/2020

[quote] Mel-, you must have felt very hurt when you heard the stories about Donald's affairs with Karen McDougal and Stormy Daniels. Do you feel better about all this nowadays?

To be frankly with you I am happy when Donalds urges are releashed on another ladys face.

by Anonymousreply 12005/24/2020

I compete in ping pong national championship r115. A lady have many skills!

by Anonymousreply 12105/24/2020

Melanoma, how have you gotten rid of all your different STDs?

by Anonymousreply 12205/24/2020

STD is pesky but natural sadness of every lady architect. I informed you earlier of the Ocean Fresh Lysol Wipes which kills poosey aromas as well as critters that live in poosey.

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by Anonymousreply 12305/24/2020

Husband say Melania no post! I say stop me! He say he go to steal money from CDC and he be back! Limited time for questions!

by Anonymousreply 12405/24/2020

Off to BE BEST?

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by Anonymousreply 12505/24/2020

So sorry for slogan. Is meant to say "See Breasts" Someway slogan writer miswrited my order to him. Stupid slogan writer!

by Anonymousreply 12605/24/2020

CDC gutted and I rich! Back to answer question!

by Anonymousreply 12705/24/2020

Bump 🍄🧑‍🦽🥓🍞

by Anonymousreply 12805/26/2020

[quote] Do you currently have or did you once have a penis?

I have strap on penes which is mainly for the use of playtime with donkey friend.

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by Anonymousreply 12905/26/2020

Yours is plump and fleshy, Melania. However, mine is unique, swirly, tickles the prostrate, and comes in handy on the rare occasions when a gentleman caller happens to have bottom needs and I can display my dominatrix talents..

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by Anonymousreply 13005/26/2020

I sometimes wear black one when pegging husband from behind. He doesn’t know I slip him BBC!

by Anonymousreply 13105/27/2020

Have you been able to find it?

by Anonymousreply 13205/27/2020

Dear Vairst Lady,

I just saw a movie called Die, Mommie, Die! where the beautiful wife and mother attempted to murder her husband with a poisoned suppository. I think there would be a Nobel Peace Prize for you if next time you dipped that strap-on in something before you slip it in him. You would be worshiped around the world, and would be able to buy a much bigger cage for Barron!

by Anonymousreply 13305/27/2020
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