Hello Gays. I am First Lady. Tell me your sex question.

How do you make a man with a small penis, and morbidly obese, happy and satisfied? What is your technique?

Coconut Oil and feets.

Naxt qvestion?

When you did your lesbian photoshoots, did you enjoy licking out the other woman involved?

What method do you use to control your herpes outbreaks?

[quote] When you did your lesbian photoshoots, did you enjoy licking out the other woman involved?

I enjoy making photo graph to pleasure horny man! Licking the vagine is the way to make Him happy.

Does Donald suck on a binky while you change his adult diaper?w

[quote] How do you make a man with a small penis, and morbidly obese, happy and satisfied? What is your technique?

To pleasure such a Man, you need bucket like this.

[quote] Does Donald suck on a binky while you change his adult diaper?w

Donald wears diaper pull up man panty.

Virst Leddy. What do you think of Michelle Obama?

r9 Michele is very Very brave to go in public looking like black lady. I truly admire her sturdy haunches and big white teeth.

Do you put a plastic liner underneath the sheets before you piss on the bed?

Dear Slovenian Whore:

I am your biggest fan. I loves that you cannot make facial expression. You are best first lady since ever. My questions for you is: How do you makes sex so good you makes men who are not so happy so happy?

Thanks you, Boris (not Russian).

r11 I do not know? That is maid job.

How do you rim your husband’s disgusting, dirty, fat, orange, cottage cheese ass?

It's never lasted more than two minutes. Tops. Am I right?

r12 thank you! I love my fannys. To make man so happy, use mouth on penes.

What sex are you?

[quote] How do you rim your husband’s disgusting, dirty, fat, orange, cottage cheese ass?

That is no job for Lady! Please ask to Jared. He is Man ass man.

Why do you live on a different floor if the WH than your ugly, obese husband?

When you make sexy with Donald, do you pull on his hair?

How does it feel having the whole world know he sticks his little orange stump in you for money?

[quote] How does it feel having the whole world know he sticks his little orange stump in you for money?

That was one time. Long ago.

[quote] When you make sexy with Donald, do you pull on his hair?

Fancy Lady like myself pull on the hair, on the penes, on the donkey tail, whatever you like.

Does he take his diaper off to fuck or just pull it down?

We've heard stories about Donald liking the wee wee. What about scat and poo? Since he wears diapers, is scat incorporated into your sex play?

No more question about pee pee and poo poo. I am LADY. Fancy Lady does NOT talk about job.

Do you view Miss LIndsey a threat to your marriage? She's pretty aggressive, you know?

When Miss Lindsey comes near I say, "Shoo, little ladyman" and he runs away like little girl... Tee hee

Mister Linzey and me share love of lace thing. Here is collection of modest nipple cover he gave to me for Birthday. Lovely man!

Varist Lady , Do you and first daughter have 3 ways ? Whom Does Donny fuck Varist ?

Melania,

Do you currently have or did you once have a penis?

How much?

How many golden showers did it take it to get your green card? How many to attain First Lady status?

Ok gay boys. It is time to put Barron in cage. Then for me the beauty sleep. Good night and sweat dream!

Is it easy to deal with Cheeto Man because you are blind? You are always squinting.

You WILL NEVER Be First Lady.

Dear Vairst Letty,

Please stop copying my homework or one shall go South Side on your filler-injected ass.

Madame First Lady, should I visit Slovenia ?

Varist Lady: who has tightest Poussy you or Varist Ivana-Check who ski to freedom? Ask Boaz Mazur, no?

Dear Slovenian Whore,

When you press on Donald's perinium, does it put him in delirium.? Does it make his tiddly wink?

Strangely Curious in Kansas

Dear First Lady,

Please tell us how Baron was conceived. Did Ivanka eat you out after blowing her father? Or was it Jared? I just can't imagine a fine lady like you allowing the orangutan to put his stubby little thing in you!

R40 I stick finger in his (how you say) anal gland hole. It covered in caca after done. We no do that no more!

What the fuck are you always squinting at?

Are you typing from the WH or Maryland?

Clearly she is trying to not see what is next to her in bed. You'd do the same.

Do you have a sex robot stunt double? I would.

All of the posts signed "Melania" are obvious forgeries because everyone knows the real First Lady can't spell her own name.

[quote] All of the posts signed "Melania" are obvious forgeries because everyone knows the real First Lady can't spell her own name.

r47 your words are not very Best. I got teached to spell my name in English.

[quote] Clearly she is trying to not see what is next to her in bed.

Next to bed is cage of Barron. I watch carefully that it is locked in the night.

Madonna or Janet Jackson?

Fake Flotus, Does your contract specify any sexual activity with the orange buffoon or are you only required to perform public appearances?

How long after he leaves office do you have to wait before filing for divorce?

Have you fucked any Secret Service agents? Man or woman?

Doo to my kidney problem which is a shy kidney I do not sex man unless I get the money. Donald has no money so no sex for Donald. Ha! Ha!

I breastfeed “husband” for 3 years after Barron ruined vageena.

Do you charge extra for anal?

r54 Yes I do and I advise you to charge extra as well.

This thread makes me want to rethink Melania's standing amongst First Ladies. This is fun!

Thank you r56! You are fun too. I am not a standing lady. Is true all First Ladys pee. Only Michele pees standing.

I bump clams with Ivanka after inauguration as a congratulations gift for daddy. She pull hair! She hard pull hair!

Does your husband also wear orange clown makeup on his wiener? If so, do you wash off said wiener before giving him sucky sucky?

[quote] Does your husband also wear orange clown makeup on his wiener?

Yes he do.

[quote] If so, do you wash off said wiener before giving him sucky sucky?

All cusstomer must wash. No wash no lick! Is my firm policy which includes Donald.

When you get bored during sex with Donald, do you count his fat rolls and chins?

Do you have any other tips for passing the time when forced to endure sex with a morbidly obese?

Political troll thread!! Block and FF!!

A thread trashing a Slovenian whore deserves a WW, Miss Priss Pants!

My beautiful thread keep gets buried

Vairst lady what are your thoughts on ATM? Is it appropriate for a lady to do in these troubled times? Any advice is appreciated.

Does he call make you wear a blonde wig and call you “Ivanka“ when he is making you poop on his chest?

R66 No, we have family bed for 3 of us! Jared sleep with Eric!

1st Lady, what about Kellyanne? Are the rumors about Kellyanne true?

Malania, do you and Hope Hicks get aloñg?

What does Chris Christie eat when he visits the WH?

[quote] 1st Lady, what about Kellyanne? Are the rumors about Kellyanne true?

I am sad to tell you yes. Is Very stinky.

[quote] Malania, do you and Hope Hicks get aloñg?

I don't know her.

[quote] What does Chris Christie eat when he visits the WH?

Here is picture of Donald with snack tray for Chris Christie.

When is your whole family going to fuck off and die?

@ r65, "Vairst lady what are your thoughts on ATM? "

I love ATM, that's where money comes from

Melania, why haven't you poisoned his fat orange ass yet? The world awaits. Do it tonight! Just lace his hydroxychloroquine with a fatal dose of arsenic, he'll never know.

Or load it in his enema, he'll love it!

[R74] No, no, no, no, no! First two word in English learn me are "prenuptial" and "agreement" so I know that I must be waiting for Donald to divorce me, or to die from his natural. Even in my homeland we have autopsy. No, no, no to arsenic!

Does no one know where to buy Polonium?

Vairst Leddy, we all know anal is extra. But how much is 'extra'? Thousands of dollars extra? Or, a small private island. in Caribbean extra?

My Anal pretty loose r76. It’s like vagena! I give discount!

[QUOTE] Vairst Leddy, we all know anal is extra. But how much is 'extra'?

$50 extra if you buy a book of five fuck tickets. (Fifth fuck is on the House).

[quote] (Fifth fuck is on the House).

But what about us?

Do you have any techniques from your native land of Slovenia for vaginal hygiene that you'd like to share?

r80 I recommend you Ocean Fresh Lysol wipes. Make your poosey fresh like ocean! Unlucky for Kelleyanne she smell like ocean but not fresh ocean. For Kelleyanne grade odors I recommend the cleaning powers of the fire.

The Melania responses are more amusing than I anticipated. Good job with your frankness and wit, Melania.

I provide coupon code exclusive for Datalounge users! Enter DLMelaniaAnalYeast into the pin pad on my ass before penetrating for 30% discount.

[quote]—Horny Male Senators (except Miss Lindsay)

While not as flamboyant & persistent as Miss Lindsay, Mitch & several others would be in Miss Lindsay's camp.

I’m just very gassy r43. I no like to hold in for so long!

If you had to munch on black vagine, would it be Stacey Abrams or Kamala Harris?

R86 Husband no like brown or black people! I have no permission to munch ethnical vagine!

[quote] If you had to munch on black vagine, would it be Stacey Abrams or Kamala Harris?

Please! I am not animal. I am lady. No blacks.

R88 is Deplorable imposter! I no racist! Husband racist!

Kamala Harris, of course. She's so strong and smart, unlike that asshole I married.

Melania, does 'Mother' Pence like you? Does she let Mike to talk with other women, even at work?

No r89 is imposter. There are many fake Melania in thread. Let me explain. Black people are friendly and good cleaner. But sex is a different thing. I will lick the black poosey if you like but it cost extra.

[quote] Melania, does 'Mother' Pence like you?

I cannot say but I doo say this. Mother pence gave me pamphlet. I use pamphlet to line cage of Barron.

2015 troll bury Melania beautiful and informative thread.

Melania, you probably have seen or heard something about this. Ivanka may have blabbed. What is the size/shape of Jared's peen?

Penes of Jared look like dainty potato. This potato is medium dainty.

Does the Donald lick your pussy? He doesn't seem like he would be a very attentive lover or a giver....

Donald does not lick poosey. Uses finger only on the poosey of Hope.

[quote] For Kelleyanne grade odors I recommend the cleaning powers of the fire.

Writing this down ...

Dear Melania,

What advice do you have for gay men who want to please men as much as you do?

I thought Kellyanne was all dust down there....

Any tips for washing out your back door poosey? You are talking to a bunch of gays here, after all.

First Floozy, when you and trump have threesomes what is it? Two ladies one man? One lady, two men? Two dwarfs, one lady? All of the above? I bet trump just watches. Am I right?

Yes you are right. Donald likes to watch ladys make love to each other. The motto of Donald the more the merryer.

[quote] What advice do you have for gay men who want to please men as much as you do?

As profesional architect I study the ways of love in building. I recommend to gay boy to have sex in fancy building. It means your classy and its handy for Mexican lady to clean up after.

Today I go to Church. Donald bought me new church dress. Is yellow for the Summertime.

After church I go boom boom then answer more sex questions for you!

Mel, it seems a lot of your time is spent cleaning poosey, sexytimes with the Donald and other Johns, and being the best. Do you take any time for self pleasure? Any advice for how to unwind after a long day of whoring?

Yes I can tell to you about self pleasure. After long day of work for United States people, I relax in wig room. Brushing the wig, looking at wig make for deep feeling of happyness.

Here are my favorite wig.

And no need for self pleasure, that’s what secret service is for!

Melania, this is so perplexing. What was Kellyanne trying to do here?

Kellyanne muting phone before assuming position! Photographs only tell partial story.

Here's a question that is on the minds of all DLers:

Does your pussy stink?

Silly question! All pooseys stink. That why we are allvays cleaning out with good smelling things!

Melania, did you ever incorporate donkeys, ping pong balls, or other performance art into your sexytimes?

R113 My pussy smell like rose garden that was fertilized with ground Cheetos and fish sticks. It keeps husband coming back $

Mel-, you must have felt very hurt when you heard the stories about Donald's affairs with Karen McDougal and Stormy Daniels. Do you feel better about all this nowadays?

Also, a First Lady never say P Word. We say vagine, and we hold pinky out when inserting tampon. It price of being classy First Lady

[quote] Melania, did you ever incorporate donkeys, ping pong balls, or other performance art into your sexytimes?

Sadly to say is proprietary secret. But I will tell to you this: the customer is always right.

[quote] Mel-, you must have felt very hurt when you heard the stories about Donald's affairs with Karen McDougal and Stormy Daniels. Do you feel better about all this nowadays?

To be frankly with you I am happy when Donalds urges are releashed on another ladys face.

I compete in ping pong national championship r115. A lady have many skills!

Melanoma, how have you gotten rid of all your different STDs?

STD is pesky but natural sadness of every lady architect. I informed you earlier of the Ocean Fresh Lysol Wipes which kills poosey aromas as well as critters that live in poosey.

Husband say Melania no post! I say stop me! He say he go to steal money from CDC and he be back! Limited time for questions!

Off to BE BEST?

So sorry for slogan. Is meant to say "See Breasts" Someway slogan writer miswrited my order to him. Stupid slogan writer!

CDC gutted and I rich! Back to answer question!

Bump 🍄🧑‍🦽🥓🍞

[quote] Do you currently have or did you once have a penis?

I have strap on penes which is mainly for the use of playtime with donkey friend.

Yours is plump and fleshy, Melania. However, mine is unique, swirly, tickles the prostrate, and comes in handy on the rare occasions when a gentleman caller happens to have bottom needs and I can display my dominatrix talents..

I sometimes wear black one when pegging husband from behind. He doesn’t know I slip him BBC!

Have you been able to find it?

Dear Vairst Lady,

I just saw a movie called Die, Mommie, Die! where the beautiful wife and mother attempted to murder her husband with a poisoned suppository. I think there would be a Nobel Peace Prize for you if next time you dipped that strap-on in something before you slip it in him. You would be worshiped around the world, and would be able to buy a much bigger cage for Barron!