When was the last time you shit yourself?

OP=Erna!

Summer of 84. Ahhh, I remember it well.

I announced to my mother that I HAD to go but she ignored me until she'd finished her cigarette. By then, my little jumpsuit was positively swimming in my waste..

It happened while I was in the presentation line to meet the Queen. Oh, it was awful. I truly regretted eating all that Mexican food and turnip greens. The Queen was not amused. There was quite a look of distaste upon her face.

3 minutes ago.

Nov. 2, 2019.

I was in Manchester, NH, on business. Finished up on Friday and stayed over that night, had a Saturday mid-afternoon flight so I went to a downtown bar/restaurant for brunch. Sat at the bar and had a lamb sausage omelet with, um, three cocktails - they were fantastic - but got pretty snockered. Finished up and was on my way out but decided to hit the men's room, was headed in and had what I thought was a big fart brewing ... let it loose right as I went into men's room and, oh shit. Literally. I stripped from the waist down - underwear were a crappy mess, threw those in the garbage, along with my socks (don't ask) ... had to wash the tops of my shoes, too, they were the only shoes I had on the trip. Washed my ass and legs in the men's room, fortunately it was a single toilet room with a lock on the main door. My jeans took some damage so I had to slip 'em back on, dash out to my rental car where I managed to put on fresh underwear and pants, tossed the jeans in the garbage. Walked around downtown for an hour or so to sober up and process my shame.

e. coli about 5 years go

dat shits nasty

You can never get shart out of clothing. You have to toss it in the trash.

Right now!😂

When I was six months old.

2 years ago. I was still drinking/smoking at the time. A coughing attack could make me shit myself or throw up back then. So glad I no longer drink or smoke!

Never.

Unless a cum load instead of shit is considered a shart. And I adore cum leakage so winning!

When you ate my ass with stitches in your tongue. Voluntarily, though. You loved it.

Hawt

Literally three days ago.

Ten years ago walking south on Park Ave just opposite the Guggenheim - overdid the magnesium at breakfast then walked from W 14th to the top of Central Park, across to Park Ave and then WHAM!!!

I couldn’t find a toilet to investigate the damage and clean up (Aussie tourist in a state of panic) so hailed a taxi and hoped he wouldn’t notice. Eventually he did and kicked me out a couple of blocks from my hotel (I apologised and tipped him a literal shitload) and then I had an unpleasantly brisk walk down to W14th where as luck would have it the front desk staff were all there ready to hear about my day.

I made my excuses, fled upstairs, got in the shower fully clothed and emerged, chastened but clean, an hour later.

After a night of Mexican food and too many margaritas. This is what happens when you’re lactose intolerant. That’s how I discovered I had the issue.

When I was in diapers

On purpose?