I spent TWO HOURS looking for toilet paper tonight...

Both water and toilet paper, initially out of stock, are back on my local shelves. Hopefully that means they will reappear on yours soon. :)

Palm Springs is out..I got Kleenex

Kleenex is bad for septic tanks. I mention this just in case you have a septic tank.

Can someone explain the hoarding of toilet paper to me? I don't get the mentality. Is coronavirus going to stop toilet paper manufacturers from producing it?

What’s more important than being able to wipe your ass, R4?

If you run out of toilet paper and you're in your own home, you can just jump in the shower. It's not a big deal.

Thank you, R6! This is exactly what I don't understand either. In fact, the fact most people don't seem to have considered that seems to suggest that they probably don't wash that part of themselves daily, which is so gross.

I buy toilet paper in bulk (you know you'll need it and it doesn't go bad so why not?) so I'm good for at least 2 months. I went today to pick up non-perishable food (which nobody else seemed to be after) and soap and the paper products aisle was something out of Mad Max. Some genius did put a display of wine next to the sold out hand sanitizer shelf. I grabbed 3 bottles. If I die, it won't be sober.

The people hoarding toilet people are the same ones who elected Trump, so do the math. Stupidity is the new normal, so nothing should surprise us anymore.

Yeah, I don't get the hoarding of TP. Do people think they'll get explosive diarrhea with the coronavirus?

Seriously, r7. I don't get the toilet paper panic. Just jump in the shower and wash your ass! You're at home FFS! Most people only have to shit once or twice a day anyway, it's not like you'll have to do it 25 times. So stupid to hoard toilet paper. Morons.

R9 be generous, they are full of shit.

Toilet paper is a self-fulfilling market panic. People hoard because people hoard. No intrinsic reason. Just a kind of mass hysteria.

You can also use flushable wipes, most toilet paper manufacturers make them.

It's not expensive to hoard 10 dozens of toilet paper. So people love to hoard it. And it's kinda comforting and rewarding too.

But in a real emergency, it's kind of pointless. In the end of the world, a clean hole will be my least concern

Many use toilet paper instead of tissues especially when they have a cold or flu. Women use it for their monthly.

Others use it to apply or remove makeup. It has many uses other than the obvious.

I'm going to have to liberate a few rolls from work if this madness continues. People have lost their damn minds.

R17 I was just about to say. Toilet paper is multi-use aside from wiping. Many, many people also use it as a Kleenex/tissue replacement.

Women use it every few hours when they pee, R17.

People are hoarding TP because they think they and their family members will either get sick and not be able to go out to get it or that they will be quarantined for an undetermined amount of time. Once word got out about hoarding, then others joined in because they fear a shortage. Plus it's easy to hoard. It doesn't require refrigeration, you can stash it anywhere, it's easy to carry, and it won't spoil, so regardless of what happens, you can use in in the future. If you live, that is.

Trump supporters believe the media are lying and blowing the pandemic out of proportion. Not sure why they'd be stocking up.

In Australia, there was reports Chinese in Australia were buying a lot and sending it to China.

Also reports of Indians here buying large quantities to then off-sell at higher prices. I think to stop the bulk buying to off-sell - supermarkets have a No Return policy for unused toilet paper products.

My local Wal-Mart was totally out, but Dollar Tree had plenty. It's two-ply and not rough or hurt-y, so cool.

I bought a huge package of Kirkland brand TP in December, and it’s still unopened (I don’t have a car and had to rent one during a family visit, so I took the opportunity to stock up at Costco even though we still had plenty from our previous package).

I had to order mine from 3 different commercial/wholesale outfits on the internet.

Sold out everywhere online, including Walmart and amazon.

Fingers crossed it actually shows up.

[quote] You can also use flushable wipes, most toilet paper manufacturers make them.

DO NOT FLUSH THEM. You are just begging for plumbing problems. No wipes and no Kleenex!!! The only thing that is safe to go down a toilet besides piss and shit is Scott toilet paper. That quilted crap will clog your pipes.

[quote] Many use toilet paper instead of tissues especially when they have a cold or flu. Women use it for their monthly.

What woman is clogging her gash with tissues???

OP, Why don't you order it at still reasonable prices? Might have to buy more than you need but I'm sure you'll eventually use it or know someone who will.

Various brands available from Georgia Pacific.

I've used pre-moistened asswipes for years and have never had any plumbing issues.

R25 Some of us live in areas with modern plumbing, thank you every much.

I bought paper towels tonight. You can always wipe with paper towels and throw them in the trash. You can't use tissue in place of paper towels. so paper towels are a better choice.

R25 is correct. Quilted toilet paper and wipes will clog your mainline. It might take a while though.

R17, I use it to write letters to my Congressmen.

[quote]You can always wipe with paper towels and throw them in the trash.

Jesus Christ that's how this fucking thing started!

R30 uhhh, i'd rather keep my toilet paper and use a dish rag/hand towels in lieu of paper towels. pretty sure i'd prefer to flush versus having a pile of shit covered Brawny hanging out in my garbage can...?

[quote]You can always wipe with paper towels and throw them in the trash.

That's some third world shit right there.

Europeans often have to put shit laden toilet paper in the wastebasket instead of flushing.

People are also buying up bottled water. Why don't they buy a water filter? It's not like they won't have running water?

My local Ace hardware store was selling 6 small rolls for $12.00. That's bullshit!

r38 it's disgusting how some people take advantage of a crisis. They're awful.

Just use the junk mail.

Someone told me she was going to get me some through Amazon, I hope she can.

I've stocked up on Imodium and refuse to eat fibre.

Take that toilet paper hoarders!

When I checked earlier on Amazon, all the real sellers were sold out. The only thing was the shady new sellers who just hoarded multiple pallets of toilet paper at Costco and are selling it for double or triple the price. Same with hand sanitizer and wipes. Fucking bullshit.

Actually, toilet paper is expensive for poor people.

I have a once read (and to never be read again) copy of David Foster Wallace's 'Infinite Jest' - I'm set.

R27 is a great solution I didn’t know existed.

[quote]In Australia, there was reports Chinese in Australia were buying a lot and sending it to China.

R21 types stupid and ignorant. Freight charges, troll?

If you think this is bad, just wait until the Poop Knife shortage.

R47 There is a whole industry of Chinese paying Australian-made products and sending back to China. There is a perception that Australian products are safer, and are more trusted then possibly tained Chinese made products. It started with baby formula.

Look up 'daigou'.

The shit troll always fools you guys.

Is that because you're assholes?

Who are the resellers of the sold out products, and price gouging, on Amazon?

Are they individuals, or businesses?

So supermarkets in Australia have put a limit to 1 item (pack) per person for toilet paper (and other products, including tissues, paper towels and rice).

We do not have a shortage of supply of toilet paper (we have a number of reliable manufacturers in Australia).

Supermarkets are restocking, generally, once a day, for toilet paper (usually at night).

There is no toilet paper throughout the day (early in the day and before closing).

Is there organised groups of people going in to buy up toilet paper (1 item per person) to then resell at inflated prices?

For the naive, for the woke brigade.

You can pry my cold, dead fingers from my toilet paper.

Donald Trump.

[quote]What woman is clogging her gash with tissues???

They wrap their pads or tampons with it before they throw them away, sweetie.

Do not use Kleenex (facial tissue). It clogs sewers. Indians are correct -- use your hands and then wash your hands.

For those of you who can't find toilet paper. Try going to a 7/11 or a small convenience store. I never have trouble finding TP in my local convenience store. my store is mostly a liquor store but it has a few groceries. I found a large bottle of 91% alcohol there too so I can make my own sanitizer.

We should be wiping our asses with our hands and then washing our hands. What is the point of 'toilet paper' ? It is such a fey commodity. Ugh. We can stick dicks up our ass but not wipe shit with our hands? Toughen up, boys.

R59. Way too much sharing of your thoughts.

OP, Were you the one who ridiculed me and called me a fear monger when weeks ago I told DL to stock up on emergency TP, food, bottled water, pet food, and especially meds?

R39, agreed. My housemate came home the other day to tell me that the friend of a guy she works with has bought up a whole lot of toilet paper and is now selling it for $100 a bundle online. These people are so revoltingly selfish.

I’m more concerned about having enough medicines and non perishable food than I am about fucking toilet paper.🙄

R39 Were the resellers Indian or Chinese?

I don’t recall this being an issue for Matt Damon’s womanly ass in “Contagion”...

You can use generic Kleenex, paper towels, paper coffee filters...just don't flush them in the toilet. Tear pages out of a magazine. Geez, grow a pair.

Our local grocery store, Giant Eagle, is completely out of toilet paper, hand soaps, and hand sanitizers. That's to be expected. But even weirder, they were also completely out of *sour cream*. Are people seriously hoarding sour cream as well out of fear of coronavirus???

You'll likely have better luck finding toilet paper at places like Family Dollar or Dollar General - fraus don't tend to shop at these places.

That's funny R67, I was thinking about buying sour cream last night, I use it for my biscuits. I wonder if everyone is home now baking biscuits.

The 99 Cent Store had a decent amount this morning. After I went there, I made the mistake of going to Winco to get some other things. The lines stretched back to the meat dept so I walked in and walked right back out. You'd think there was a hurricane coming, but we live in the desert. I'll just do my shopping at 10pm or 6am for the foreseeable future.

I found plenty at the Dollar General this morning. The clerk told me they even had more in the back.

[quote]Can someone explain the hoarding of toilet paper to me? I don't get the mentality. Is coronavirus going to stop toilet paper manufacturers from producing it?

Uh, exactly for situations such as RIGHT NOW?! Every store is out and people are resorting to using newspaper. It was smart for those people to hoard. Sucks for people with your mentality.

There us nothing wrong with using ur hand and washing it or having a bowl of water u soak in after each dump.

[quote] The people hoarding toilet people are the same ones who elected Trump, so do the math. Stupidity is the new normal,

If you have toilet people you’ve got bigger problems.

Toilet paper?

Am I the only person who buys in bulk? Fortunately I ran low about a month or so ago so I stocked up. But seriously...everyone shits. It just makes sense to me to always buy the 12+ packs, I know I'll use it eventually.

I don't have a bidet but I ran the garden hose up the stairs to the bathroom so I'm all set.

[quote] Uh, exactly for situations such as RIGHT NOW?! Every store is out and people are resorting to using newspaper. It was smart for those people to hoard.

If they hadn't hoarded, every store wouldn't be out, idiot.

Thankfully, my neighborhood seems to be free from such hoarders; there is TP on the shelves in all the bodegas and grocery stores.

[quote] The shit troll always fools you guys. Is that because you're assholes?

Har har. People are in fact hoarding toilet paper. Why shouldn't we discuss that if we please? Who cares if a shit troll started the thread?

OP, consider using family cloth.

[quote]Uh, exactly for situations such as RIGHT NOW?! Every store is out and people are resorting to using newspaper. It was smart for those people to hoard. Sucks for people with your mentality.

I guess you're talking to me. I found a shitload of it, pun intended, at a small supermarket in my neighborhood this afternoon.

I haven’t subscribed to the paper for years. I get written news from internet sites. Am I supposed to wipe with my iPad?

I can’t live in a world with no toilet paper.

Get a bidet whats wrong with you people

Trump needs to release federal stockpiles of toilet paper NOW!

Does anyone know how toilet paper is doing in the futures markets?

[quote] there is TP on the shelves in all the bodegas

Bodega toilet paper?

Oh, my.

You’re a have not

[quote] Bodega toilet paper? Oh, my.

They sell the same brands as everyone else, ffs. And, yes, a few sketchy ones, too, but no need to select those.

Bodegas sell Scoot and Charmaine, not the regular brands.

I just put on a new roll last night, now I have to pay attention to how long it lasts me, see if I have enough to share.

Can you spare a square?

Where is R67? No post at that number.

[quote]Where is [R67]? No post at that number.

You probably have them blocked, R91.

All the stores in Philly had it.

R92, or vice versa

I have a 2 year supply in my house for me one person. Whenever it was on sale, I would buy it. I have the same in paper towels. I have a freezer full of food. There is no rice, pasta, bread or any bad carbs in my house. I have 3 cases of 24 pack Poland springs. The only things I need on a weekly basis is fresh fruit and vegetables.

[quote]The only things I need on a weekly basis is fresh fruit and vegetables.

And lessons in basic grammar.

Bidets are like $30 on Amazon. Get one.

r95 you should eat rice, it's good for you. And a little bread and pasta, too.

[quote]Bidets are like $30 on Amazon.

How much is a garden hose and nozzle from Wal-Mart?

[quote]Is coronavirus going to stop toilet paper manufacturers from producing it?

That's basically what people are worried about, yeah. That industry and the supply chain will be hit by closures (or WAS hit by closures in China) and it won't be manufactured at a rate to keep up with demand.

Somebody call Dwight Schrute!

[quote] I don’t recall this being an issue for Matt Damon’s womanly ass in “Contagion”...

Perhaps he was able to grow papyrus from his own waste as he was able to grow potatoes from his own waste in "The Martian"?

Only proles shit, you're all gross.

I imagine Trump will throw rolls of toilet paper into American crowds like he threw paper towels in Puerto Rico.

I wanted to buy clear Gatorade or clear Power One for my colonoscopy prep (I had to drink 8 glasses of clear fluid the day if they prep). Only 1 clear Gatorade in the whole supermarket.

[quote]There is no rice, pasta, bread or any bad carbs in my house.

Well, smell you, Nancy Drew!

Rubbing Alcohol - Out of stock everywhere!

I tired Von's, Ralph, CVS, Rite Aid, Walgreens, Walmart, and even Amazon. Found a few bottles on Ebay which I didnt buy because they wanted 30 dollars a bottle! Plus shipping. That stuff normally only cost about 2 dollars when people are not in panic mode.

I haven't bought anything yet.

You can still get this for real on Amazon.

Guys, toilet paper isn’t indispensable. Did you know that you could wash your ass? In the shower for example? With soap? Your rough unclean toilet paper ass will thank you for it.

Toilet paper out out my stores too. Fuck!

R109, sadly, it won't arrive until late April/early May. (If supply chains are still disrupted at that point, toilet paper will be the least of our concerns.)

[quote] Rubbing Alcohol - Out of stock everywhere!

Not here, baby. Come on by and shtay for a shpell.

[quote]Rubbing Alcohol - Out of stock everywhere! I tired Von's, Ralph, CVS, Rite Aid, Walgreens, Walmart, and even Amazon. Found a few bottles on Ebay which I didnt buy because they wanted 30 dollars a bottle! Plus shipping. That stuff normally only cost about 2 dollars when people are not in panic mode.

Damn. I just threw out a full bottle of rubbing alcohol while "Marie Kondo"-ing a few weeks ago, because I couldn't remember why I purchased it and had no idea what I was going to use it for. Joke is on me.

Everclear is 95% ethanol if you can't find rubbing alcohol. I used to use it for making cologne. Then the medical lab that rented office space from my company went under, and left behind a ton of stuff. I brought home 4 gallons of 95% ethanol that I use instead now. I have over 3 gallons of it in my closet.

R16, There won't be much rimming during a viral pandemic.

R95, Do you have a spare bedroom?

[quote] Everclear is 95% ethanol if you can't find rubbing alcohol.

*taking notes*

[quote] Do you have a spare bedroom?

R117, why would he need a spare bedroom?

You don’t think he’s giving up his supplies without a little something-something from you, do you?

I drove out not the country and shit in the woods

Do you have a Dollar General in your area? I traveled around to over a dozen stores, without luck. I went to Dollar General and they had some, because people were bypassing them for the bigger stores. Also, the cashier told me they get deliveries more often than some of the bigger stores.

I feel like I have a mild fever and spent two hours looking for a thermometer. They're out everywhere. What are people supposed to do?

Agree that dollar tree here in the Midwest was well stocked on paper products.

I went shopping this evening at a major supermarket and was expecting some empty shelves, but it was a lot worse than I had imagined. I was planning to buy some eggs and milk, but both were sold out. What is the point of stockpiling dairy products? All those eggs that flew off the shelves aren't going to taste so good in July.

I spent about 90 minutes tonight looking for a specific odor eliminator and disinfectant that I use frequently when my dog horfs up, shits or pisses on something. Home Depot and Lowes and Smart & Final all had nothing except general purpose cleaners and a small number of bottles of bleach.

At my 2nd Home Depot I found 4 bottles - somebody had turned the bottles with the labels facing backwards, and they were sitting pushed to the rear of the bottom shelf. As a top I always check the bottom, so I turned a bottle around, and ah hah, 4 bottles of OdoBan Lavender flavored quaternary ammonium disinfectant. $8.98 a gallon, good price - Amazon is officially charging almost $26/bottle. A gal bottle makes a lot.

Not having hoarded anything yet this state of emergency, I decided to do my part and took 2 bottles. It will take me 6 months to go through that much.

[quote]I spent TWO HOURS looking for toilet paper tonight...

No shit, OP?

There are tons of it sitting in retailer warehouses. They just need to truck it to the stores. Hopefully now that the rush is over, everyone will be able to get some.

I hope people will be getting sick of hoarding by tomorrow morning. Or at least that all the deplorables will be in church so I can find what I need and not stand in line for 2 hours. Assuming that the stores have even replenished some of their stock by then...(not looking for TP, just fresh fruit/veg and a few other staples)

I'm sure the trucks will be on the road on Monday.

I don't know why people are even bothering to try shopping this weekend. We all know there is hysterical panic shopping and hoarding. It's the weekend and people have nothing better to do. Wait a few days. The hoarders will be hiding in their homes afraid to come out. The stores will be re-supplied (like they are every night now). There is no point in trying to buy stuff this weekend.

Personally, I'm praying for constipation.

FYI . . . facial tissue is not flushable.

What is clear Gatorade?

It’s Gatorade that’s clear, R133. No color to it.

On a related note, I very recently installed a bidet, and it's terrific. So much better than paper. Highly recommended.

#teamimodium

Basic Bidet attachments are $35 on Amazon and very easy to install. Stop the tp panic, we bought one last summer and it’s great!

Americans are never going to take to bidets en masse. Just won't happen. They'll go back to using catalog pages or leaves before that happens.

Don't you have to dry your ass after using a bidet? How does that work?

R139 You can use thin washcloths to dry and put them in the hamper. I only poo once a day so its not a huge deal to have a dozen thin wash cloths in the bathroom. I have a roll or two of tp in case we have a visitors.

R139, That's why God made hair dryers.

The problem with cheap bidets is the water that comes out is ice cold.

No way

I can’t just have any old Tp; I MUST have Charmin!!

I usually buy a year’s worth of TP from Amazon but now I only have 19 rolls left!

If I get down to 10 too quickly, I will seriously unroll the double ply so I get two rolls of single ply per 1 double ply roll

R143, It's Scott 1000 sheets for me.

[quote] As a top I always check the bottom,

I’m so in love with this dude here.

I have been a regular buyer of Gatorade for at least a decade and have never seen nor heard of clear Gatorade. Now I MUST have some.

You've never heard of or seen Gatorade Frost?

Have you been self-quarantining for decades?

I dont get the drying part of bidet thing? I have watched several videos and I know there are different kinds of bidets with dryers and automatic touch, but those are very high end. What is the social etiquette if you go do someones house and need to use the restroom and there is only one towel? Do people reuse those? Do they share them? gross? I know you just washed your ass so it "should" be clean but still, no one would share a cloth napkin at a restaurant for example.

Clear Gatorade is good for one thing...colonoscopy! No not up your ass, you still drink it. You see, once you pass the age of 50, it is recommended that everyone get a check up in there for cancer. The prep is the worst part, you spend the day before going into the hospital drinking gallons of fluid flushing your system out. The stuff they make you drink tastes like salted lemonade. It's gross. No food is allowed except clear jello or clear liquids. Clear Gatorade is your friend. I think they make clear Coke now too.

Relinquish the Charmin or I will have you EJECTED into SPACE!

I was at the grocery store, and noticed that they were sold right out of three specific items:

1 Toilet paper 2 Canned beans 3 Frozen vegetables.

I guess that the hoarders want to eat lots of fiber, which means lots of poop, thus the toilet paper shortage.

What a bunch of ass wipes.

Literally.

Trump has asked people not to hoard, so no doubt the stores will soon have plenty of toilet paper and everything else snatched up by panic buyers.

I was able to find some toilet paper at local health food stores. There is a limit to one 4-pack per customer, but that's better than nothing, and keeps people from hoarding.

Has Trump been rage tweeting lately?

It not like people are hoarding toilet paper and food. They are buying it for their families, hopefully. The schools have closed, so families are going to need more food, toilet paper and supplies to feed them. Families are also shopping for their elderly parents and relatives.

In my store, all the toilet paper was gone (but they do not have much anyways), all the mac and cheese, soup and frozen pizza. Obviously, it for the kids. I am sure most of the kids are having a hard time with this.

[quote]It not like people are hoarding toilet paper and food. They are buying it for their families, hopefully.

Except for the ones hoarding toilet paper so they can sell it at 10 times its original price.

I don’t give a shit about some frau’s snotty rug rats. They are on indefinite vacation and soon will be terrorizing the neighborhood.

yeah, it is true. There are scumbags that are buying toilet paper at lower prices, then when it's stocked out will sell at 10x plus the price. Though, I think the vast majority of the people in the stores are families.

R157, Hmm . . .

R158, Do you think school children will organize into street gangs in the time they’re off?

Sure, if they haven't already.

[quote] Do you think school children will organize into street gangs in the time they’re off?

Like in West Side Story?

With singing and dancing and the like?

Well, yes, the theater kids might…

I went to the grocery store---Winco--and the lines to get in were around the storefront, WTF? Then went to Von's and all the paper products were sold out, hamburger meat, ready made salads. There were two packages of chicken left but plenty of roasts and lots of salmon. Why don't people buy roasts? Sure, it's $20 a package but it lasts you all week.

Luckily, I have a mega-roll of toilet paper and paper towels I bought at Costco a month ago. I will have to ration it since who knows how long this panic buying will last. I am using microfiber towels instead of paper towels to clean (much better for the environment). This is TMI, but I have hemorrhoids so will use hemorrhoid pads instead of toilet paper. At least you can order them online. Toilet paper is totally out of stock online, anywhere, everywhere.

I don't have hemorrhoids, but thanks for that info r165. If I run out of tp, I'll remember that.

Even baby wipes are sold out now.

If the toilet paper shortage continues, some people are bound to use items that are not made to be flushed, resulting in expensive plumbing repairs.

"Facial tissues do not break down in water the same way toilet paper does. They should never be flushed down the toilet; flushed Kleenex can cause clogs and other serious plumbing issues."

Back when we had wi-fi!

R168 you mean dial up! That shit is from 2001!

There needs to be people who publicly shame others who appear to be shopping to hoard. DLers, who already monitor the shopping carts of other shoppers, would be really good at that.

All this talk about toilet paper is giving me flashbacks. I remember years ago there used to be a health food store brand of toilet tissue made from cotton. It was the softest most amazing TP ever.

[quote] Do you think school children will organize into street gangs in the time they’re off?

most stores are limiting it.

I just got some of these.

I was at my supermarket Wednesday evening and I saw two shoppers basically filling multiple carts with toilet paper. Selfish hoarders are what is causing the shortage.

We were down to our last roll. Found the last pqck at a local Publix store.

STORES ARE NOT CLEANING ANYMORE THAN USUAL. IVE BEEN TO A TARGET, A WALMART AND A CVS AND ALL WERE DISGUSTING!!!

The target and cvs are in a ritzy area. No excuse. DIRTY DOORS, FLOORS AND WINDOWS.

THE PARKING LOTS HAD WEEKS OF TRASH AND NOT BEEN CLEANED.

THE SCANNERS WERE CAKED WITH FILTH AND THE SCREENS COVERED IN FINGERPRINTS.

SUE THEM TO OBLIVION!!!!!

Has anyone actually run out of TP?

R175 and what store was that? Most every store I've been to have set limits on the amount you can buy.

R178, So far, Tori Spelling.

Ethel Kennedy has been a fan of bidets for decades.

R179, But, what's to stop a mother bringing along a couple of her kids and having them check out separately and going home with multiple packages?

Why are you SCREAMING, r177?!

I mean, these are the times. We just gotta deal with them and hope for more shipments. It's basically opening weekend for a blockbuster, and all the opening night showtimes are boooooooooked! wait for a week or two and crowds should hopefully die down. hope you've got at least ENOUGH for that amount of time, or can at least ration what you have. just be reasonable people.

In Los Angeles the news is showing the hoarders and 80% are fat asses. One guy they interviewed said "I don't know what I'm buying."

[quote]I was at my supermarket Wednesday evening and I saw two shoppers basically filling multiple carts with toilet paper. Selfish hoarders are what is causing the shortage.

With all the panic buying going on, no store should allow this.

I had to go to the store last night as I hadn't been in 9 days. People are still hoarding here, one chick who had 4 cases of canned vegetables who was about to learn she was limited to 3 cans of each item, and another guy with a dozen boxes of cereal. Water was rationed at max 1 gal per person. There is no bread, or baking supplies, or pasta or beans or canned goods or animal food.

The store was trashed with mis-shelved shit everywhere, left behind by crazies who decided they didn't want to buy that last can of pork and beans after all. The only milk was the most expensive brand and my favorite. A friend in another city said that after about 36 hours of crazy, things were back to normal by Saturday. Not here. I called Walmart to bitch that they refused my disabled friend's Walmart Grocery online order [italic]twice[/italic], telling us the 2nd time that people in the store had priority. The nice phone lady explained that store managers are instructed to give priority to delivery and pickup orders. She sent my friend a $20 coupon for her trouble.

I had to go to the store last night as I hadn't been in 9 days. People are still hoarding here, one chick who had 4 cases of canned vegetables who was about to learn she was limited to 3 cans of each item, and another guy with a dozen boxes of cereal. Water was rationed at max 1 gal per person. There is no bread, or baking supplies, or pasta or beans or canned goods or animal food.

The store was trashed with mis-shelved shit everywhere, left behind by crazies who decided they didn't want to buy that last box of gluten-free tortellini after all. The only milk was the most expensive brand and my favorite. A friend in another city said that after about 36 hours of crazy, things were back to normal by Saturday. Not here. I called Walmart to bitch that they refused my disabled friend's Walmart Grocery Pickup online order [italic]twice[/italic], telling us the 2nd time that people in the store had priority. The nice phone lady explained that store managers are instructed to give priority to delivery and pickup orders. She sent my friend a $20 coupon for her trouble.

So weird my post R187 didn't post after an hour so I re-wrote it, and here they both are. Muriel must be out buying toilet paper.

She doesn’t need any. She has a stable of twinks for that.

The Target on Westheimer in Houston has toilet paper.

There are queues now to get inside the supermarket. And most everyone is wearing a mask. It feels like one of those movies like 28 Days Later or whatever the title was.

Bake a toilet paper cake!

The fraus are seething right now, since they can't graze at Panera.

Solution for OP, get with the scat troll. He will lick it clean!!!

Is OP hot?

[quote] People are also buying up bottled water. Why don't they buy a water filter? It's not like they won't have running water?

Huge numbers of people have bad tasting water. Central FL is full of sulphur. Long Island water is often overchlorinated. Well water & river water can be contaminated with chemicals, pesticides, coal crap and anyone who was in an area where there was an E. coli outbreak will drink bottled water.

I went to the bank this morning and a customer came in saying loudly that she had been to five places this morning and they were all out of toilet paper, and she didn’t get any. That was around 9am, so she must have started early.

I don’t know what was going on at the bank, but I wanted to close my account and they are being extremely cagey and don’t want to give me cash. I wonder if there’s been a run on the banks, or they’re afraid there’s about to be.

I’ve been trying to get my money out for a week, and it’s been one delay after another. Supposedly an employee “forgot” to put in an order for the money, then it was he was working at another branch. The teller at my bank called him and had an extremely long conversation with him. The whole time she was holding the phone close to her mouth and looking secretive. She was whispering, but mostly just listening to what he was saying. But they say nothing’s wrong.

Now they’re telling me I can have a small amount of cash tomorrow, and have to wait for part of the rest. And I had to make and appointment to get the money at the end of the week. That’s really odd, don’t you think? I’m not sure the banks will even be open in a week. This is a very large chain.

I’m guessing people are pulling cash out and they don’t want to say anything because they’re afraid of a run on the banks.

R197 literally the only decent drinking water from the tap is in Hawaii.

I went to three dollar stores today. All of them had four-packs of toilet paper. Still no hand sanitizer, antibacterial soap, or Lysol spray, though.

Americans are selfish asshole cunts. It's been this way for DECADES! This is why assholes are destroying stores. Plus, there are many many many here who are tribal.

Market Basket, a major New England grocery chain, had fully stocked shelves in a suburb north of Boston this afternoon.

The paper products aisle had plenty of toilet paper, paper towels and facial tissue, only it was all their store brand.

Los Angeles is infested with selfish assholes of all economic backgrounds.

The Costco in Charlottesville, VA was restocked with toilet paper this morning (although the limit is one package per customer). Clorox wipes and rubbing alcohol were still out of stock.

Toilet paper, paper towels, cleaning supplies, meat and poultry all out of stock. This is all over. Everyone I know is saying the same thing.

How did South Korea handle it? Did they have mobs at the stores buying up toilet paper?

Switch to diapers.

R206 the people there just kill themselves before the corona does.

In 2007, singer Sheryl Crow was made to be a laughing stock when, in an open letter on Huffington Post, she suggested a way to slow climate change was to use only one square of toilet paper after going potty.

Sheryl Crow also made herself a laughing stock when she criticized other female musicians for using their sexuality to sell music.

And then there was this . . .

Sheryl Crow witnessed Lance Armstrong receive an illicit blood transfusion while they were dating in 2004, according to a soon to be released book about the disgraced cyclist’s extensive doping program.

In an excerpt from ”Wheelmen: Lance Armstrong, the Tour de France, and the Greatest Sports Conspiracy Ever” obtained by The New York Daily News, Wall Street Journal reporters Reed Albergotti and Vanessa O’Connell revealed that the Grammy Award-winning musician spoke with a Food and Drug Administration criminal investigator about her knowledge of Armstrong’s doping routine.

“Rather than try to hide the transfusion from her, Armstrong was completely open about it,” Albergotti and O’Connell wrote, according to the Daily News. “He trusted that Crow would have no desire to tell the press or anyone else about the team’s doping program. He explained that it was simply part of the sport – that all cyclists were doing the same thing.”

Crow and Armstrong began dating in 2003. They were engaged in 2005 but split in 2006.

You can only buy so much stuff on an average income. These Fraus are going to run out of money and space for all that junk food and TP. Sooner or later things will calm down. There is no shortage. They were just slammed by the entire country decided on the same weekend to do a massive panic shopping. Give it a week or two and I bet grocery stores will be having sales. You can only be in panic mode for so long and American Fraus are too lazy to keep it up long term.

Times are tough...but your toilet paper doesn’t have to be.

[quote] The paper products aisle had plenty of toilet paper, paper towels and facial tissue, only it was all their store brand.

Store brand toilet paper? Oh, how positively common and revolting.

Here in Italy, the land of the bidet, no such problems. People are buying toilet paper more than usual but they don't actually run out. Just bought my usual small pack yesterday and didn't feel the need to hoard and deny others.

[quote]I spent TWO HOURS looking for toilet paper tonight...

Did you check under the bathroom sink?

Napkins are pretty cheap and available if you're ok using something that you shouldn't flush.

The toilet paper aisle was empty but they still had adult diapers. Hm-m-m-m-m-m.

The problem isn’t WHERE to shit, it’s cleaning up after.

Why are humans the only species that has to wipe after doing their business? Animals poop in a much more tidy way with little residue left behind. How did humans evolve so that they leave such a poopy mess between their buttcheeks?

Predictably, this has turned into a scat thread.

[quote]The toilet paper aisle was empty but they still had adult diapers.

The thought just occurred to me that you could tear up an adult diaper and use that as toilet paper. Better than nothing!

[quote] Predictably, this has turned into a scat thread.

So Sweeeeeeettt!!!

BA-baaaa-dweet-doobie-doobie-dah!

I got the last 6-pack of Charmin today at a Dollar General in a less-known location, after going to five other stores beforehand.

I can understand people stockpiling water and toilet paper but what's with people hoarding paper plates?

The crowds are getting out of control. They really should limit the amount of shoppers in the grocery store to minimize risk. Someone said that they went to the grocery store early and the truck that was unloading was surrounded by shoppers. There were also fights breaking out between shoppers. There needs to be order so I think the stores need to hire Security guards or police or government get involved in managing the crowds and the hoarding. People end up with no food!

or better yet, encourage people to order online and they get priority.

I'm a little surprised at your stories, R226. Most groceries and big box stores have loading areas in the back, far away from shoppers.

Online ordering has cratered due to excessive demand. I can't get a delivery from Safeway, Kroger, Amazon Fresh or Walmart here. They say that there are no dates available.

r227, I lines at least where I live are wrapped around stores including the stores loading areas. People are everywhere hoarding. Most are selfish fat asses.

My friend told me that toilet paper was back on shelves this afternoon, usually they are gone by that time.

I cannot find potatoes anywhere.

I very recently went to TJ Maxx and Marshalls and picked up a ton of those microfiber towels . I got like 10 for $6. I bought them to replace paper towels, because have you seen the price of paper towels lately? Who owns Brawny paper towels? Koch brothers. They artificially raise the price and all the other brands follow, why wouldn't they?

Anyways, I filled the drawers with these and don't miss my paper towels at all.

In a pinch, I would use these microfiber towels in place of PT in a heartbeat. It's just common sense.

I highly recommend dumping the paper towels to everyone who has a washer/dryer in their residence. Screw the Kochs. Also, I picked up a couple extra to clean the bathroom at the Dollar Tree, 4 towels for $1.

Women need TP for those situations.

Some stores are making their first-hour of the day seniors-only.

That seems right and fair, R233.

There's a small supermarket in my D.C. neighborhood that has has had an ample supply of four-packs of toilet paper both times I've gone there this week,. It also has a sign: "Limit of one per customer." Gee, what a novel idea. Maybe the stores who allow people to load up multiple shopping carts with toilet paper should try it.

. . . the stores THAT allow . . .

Every store I've been to in the past week and a half or so have had limits on water, toilet paper, and other staples. I'm surprised there are any stores that haven't implemented this already.

I stopped into the supermarket Thursday & there was no fresh meat, but other groceries were ok. I went tonight to get wet cat food.....none. Bread, eggs, milk, cheese, yogurt .... gone. . I noticed the Entenmann’s shelf was nearly bare. The cakes, doughnuts were sold out. Only the boxes containing wrapped items, like pre wrapped cinnamon buns, were left. I guess either they arent getting deliveries or everyone went batshit over the weekend

Honestly, you should just use your hands plus soap and water to wash your ass. It sounds gross but it is actually significantly less irritating than toilet paper. And you want have to hunt down toilet paper.

That’s fucking undignified, r239.

[quote]Honestly, you should just use your hands plus soap and water to wash your ass.

This isn't the Third World.

And if you wash in the shower like R239 says, you can dig up your asshole and get the water up there, two knuckles clean at least. Can't do that with toilet paper.

What's the big fucking deal about washing your ass in the shower after you take a shit, instead of using toilet paper? It's not difficult at all.

We've already heard about that technique in this thread, R239, and we were horrified enough the first time.

r244 some of you are actually "horrified" by washing your ass with your hands, in the shower? What kind of freaks are you?

I have a feeling OP is in this somewhere.

Reddit link, couldn't figure out how to post the video directly.

You would think people spent half their day on the toilet with the amount of tp they're buying.

R247, Haven't you seen the commercials for Colitis and Crohn's Disease?

[quote] What kind of freaks are you?

Oh, honey! How much time do you have?

Just go into a large hotel use their public restroom and walk out with a roll.

Hotels don't have many guests now, they have lots.

I think that there's another issue contributing to the shortages on store shelves. A neighbor is a civilian employee on a military base. At work, she was issued a bottle of Purell, a bottle of clorox sanitizer, and a can of Lysol spray. Is the gov't buying these items directly from the manufacturers, preventing the replenishing of supermarket shelves?

You don't need hand sanitizer or rubbing alcohol. All you need is soap and water. Dr David Agus said the water doesn't even need to be hot. You just need the soap and you need to scrub.

Has the tp situation improved for any of you? I haven’t seen it on big store shelves in three weeks.

My local pharmacy chain gets toilet paper in almost every day, but it tends to go pretty fast.

They’re only letting old people in (excuse me, “seniors”) for the first hour in most of the stores where I live. They deplete the stock of toilet paper whenever it is on shelves. How is this fair?

Out of stock online everywhere with the exception of a few sites who are price gouging.

I scored a 12-pack of Angel Soft this morning at 6:00 AM in a suburban Boston supermarket after a week long search.

They only had six packages on the shelf, I took one.

Admittedly, being 68 allowed me to enter the store that early and find what I needed.

Finally, being over 60 worked in my favor.

My local Walmart got in a few cases of generic TP. It was still going pretty fast.

[quote] Finally, being over 60 worked in my favor.

Enjoy it, cause it never will again.

Same problems here. Cannot get it anywhere.

Cannot find Clorox wipes or hand sanitizers anywhere.

They must be giving all to hospitals.

I've been finding TP lately (in stores that limit it to one package per customer) but still can't find paper towels

We're going to be wiping our asses with leaves like cavemen pretty soon.

Most stores are limiting one pack of paper per customer

That’s a start, r264, but if it’s not on the shelves and available you could limit it to 1/2 pack and it still won’t make a difference.

Most of the stores around me have TP (limit 1 per person) until around 900AM and then it all gets sold out.

Clorox Wipes are impossible to find, however, if you have some bleach and paper towels (if anyone can find those anywhere any more), you can easily make your own.

Yep r255. Usually the toilet paper they get in for the day is gone by the time the senior only shopping is done.

Every time I see TP, I grab a pack. Scott’s, 7th generation, IDC...Up to 12 rolls stashed away (we use about 2 roll per week)

R267, Let my people wipe!

For the first time in three weeks, I finally saw some toilet paper on the shelf at my store of choice. There were only about half a dozen 4-packs of some off-brand, but it was TWO-PLY, so it was like gold as far as I'm concerned. They limit it to one package per person, but that's okay. I'm four rolls better off than I was. So there is hope, people.

(Also, I was there at around 7:30 PM, so I didn't have to line up at the crack of dawn with the oldsters to get it, either.)

Shelves were bare of toilet paper when my nearest supermarket opened on Saturday morning.

There was a sealed pallet in the middle of the aisle with one case of toilet paper lodged in the middle.

Another shopper and I broke the seal, carefully pulled out the case and went home with what we came for.

[quote] so I didn't have to line up at the crack of dawn

When this whole thing is over I can’t wait to line up at the crack of Dan.

Does your butt itch, OP?

OP's post is more than two weeks old. I imagine it's pretty damn itchy if he's still out there looking for toilet paper.

Certain stores will be putting out TP at various times, usually 2-3 mornings a week. Hoarders will clear the shelves in under an hour unless the store has a strict limit per customer.

Are any of you encountering stores that aren't setting limits?

Foodlion^

R277 have you tried calling and asking them to set limits?

The strangest thing - I used to order from Target.com once a week until recently because I always got a 10 pack of tuna filets for my cats. (Target.com stopped carrying them). In January I needed Clorox wipes, so I ordered a 3 pack from Target. I remember thinking “they’re awfully expensive these days” and when I got them, it turned out I had accidentally ordered a 3 pack of giant cylinders. My husband was like “Do we even have shelf space big enough for those things?” I accidentally bought months & months worth of them.

When I ordered, I wanted a box of individually wrapped Wet Ones, but Target.com wouldn’t deliver a box - I’d have to pick them up at the store. So I said fuck it, I went to amazon & found I could only order 6 boxes of them. So I said “What the hell, I’ll buy a year’s supply of them.” So when the shit hit the fan I had plenty of them & now stuff my pockets with them when I go out.

I also asked my husband to buy a bottle of Clorox bleach spray in January when he went to a supermarket. The bottle I keep beside my kitchen sink was getting low. He came home and said, “Look - you had me buy this Clorox spray bleach & there’s a whole unopened bottle under the sink.”

So I have plenty of disinfectant spray to last me for months.

I accidentally stocked up for coronavirus before I needed to,

R278 I spoke to the Assistant Manager about it last week while there. He said that may happen but it hasn't been ordered to be done yet. I don't know if other stores in the franchise are functioning the same. This is a relatively small town with only two supermarkets. The other, an independent operator, gets depleted of certain products quickly as well.

i just spent $10 on toilet paper. 10 DOLLARS.

For anyone looking for toilet paper - check the bottom of Donald Trump's shoe.

[R281] Candy Darling!! You're alive!!!

Geez, R281 you could have bought a whole banana for that much.