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Really cool house sitting gifts?

I am heading to Vermont for a week starting on Friday. My friend is going to be looking after the house and dog for us while we are gone.

I would like to do something nice for her as a thank you for looking after things while we are on vacation. I’m pretty sure she is in an abusive relationship, her husband totally sucks, so I have to be mindful of things he would want her to have/do. This means things like a manicure/hair products, etc. are out of the question (not that I know the first thing about them...)

Any ideas?

by Anonymousreply 23December 9, 2019 12:45 AM

Lexus LE

by Anonymousreply 1December 5, 2019 12:45 AM

Name a bedroom after her.

by Anonymousreply 2December 5, 2019 12:46 AM

Why would you let a woman with an unhinged, abusive husband look after your house, OP? Make sure she doesn't allow him over.

by Anonymousreply 3December 5, 2019 12:47 AM

A place to live so she can leave him

by Anonymousreply 4December 5, 2019 12:48 AM

cozy earth sheets

William sonoma gift basket

by Anonymousreply 5December 5, 2019 12:48 AM

Booze. The good stuff, not the rotgut you usually drink.

by Anonymousreply 6December 5, 2019 12:52 AM

R2/R3/R4 - I’ve been told that you should never directly confront someone in that type of relationship otherwise it might isolate a person she can confide in.

I’ve made it clear that she has a place in my home if anything happens. I want to help her, but I don’t know how!

He’s okay with her hanging out with me because I’m gay and therefore not a threat. He’s literally told her that before.

by Anonymousreply 7December 5, 2019 12:56 AM

OP, do not, I repeat, do not let her stay at your place if anything happens. Take back that offer. Help her look for a place of her own or direct her to a woman's shelter, but don't let her stay at your home if she decides to leave her husband.

by Anonymousreply 8December 5, 2019 1:00 AM

A day at a spa - it doesn't have to be hair and nails kind of a day - just a day of pampering for her and her along

by Anonymousreply 9December 5, 2019 1:02 AM

Cash. Seriously. No gift cards. No gift baskets. Cash.

by Anonymousreply 10December 5, 2019 1:05 AM

I think Ernst is the most kindhearted DLer-- or a troll!

by Anonymousreply 11December 5, 2019 1:09 AM

Or a fool for letting a woman with an abusive husband look after his dog. What if the guy snaps for some reason?

by Anonymousreply 12December 5, 2019 1:10 AM

If the husband snaps, there goes the dog-- and the friend!

by Anonymousreply 13December 5, 2019 1:12 AM

A handmaiden's outfit!

by Anonymousreply 14December 5, 2019 1:17 AM

a gun

also, i hope you beat the storm we have inbound!

by Anonymousreply 15December 5, 2019 1:18 AM

[quote] I’m pretty sure she is in an abusive relationship, her husband totally sucks, so I have to be mindful of things he would want her to have/do. This means things like a manicure/hair products, etc. are out of the question

WTF?! Care to explain that, OP?

by Anonymousreply 16December 5, 2019 1:18 AM

Cash or a preloaded Visa card. She needs to start hiding money away as part of her eventual exit strategy. You can just hand it to her and say, "This is for your nest egg" and give her a meaningful look.

Sadly, I have to agree with the other posters who cautioned you against offering to let her stay. You could end up a casualty when he comes after her. It happens way too often. The Good Samaritan who helped my mom after she crashed her car was killed a few months later after he let a neighbor lady into his home to escape her abusive husband. The husband shot his way into the house and killed them both.

by Anonymousreply 17December 5, 2019 1:18 AM

I’ve literally never thought of any of this that you all are cautioning about.

I should clarify, he (to my knowledge) hasn’t physically abused her. It is emotional. Not that it makes it any better, but I can’t see him hurting anyone. But this does have me kind of afraid for her now! And my pup!

Thanks for the heads up. I let my caring side cloud my judgement sometimes, I just don’t want to see people suffer.

by Anonymousreply 18December 5, 2019 1:27 AM

Maybe better to put your dogs in a kennel. Might end up cheaper that way. I would trust only a very, very few people to house-sit my house.

R16, I'm guessing the husband is controlling, doesn't want the woman getting too attractive. Someone else might get interested in her. (If she gets her hair and nails done.)

by Anonymousreply 19December 5, 2019 3:07 AM

Ernst is insufferable DON'T BELIEVE ANYTHING HE SAYS, he is a toxic troll disguising as a homely man. Everything with you is about your imaginary husband/husbear.

by Anonymousreply 20December 8, 2019 8:21 PM

A list of all the medicines and items in your bathroom medicine cabinet. It will save her so much snooping and testing time.

by Anonymousreply 21December 8, 2019 8:26 PM

A long flight of stairs she can claim to have fallen down when bruises inevitably show up on her face.

"It wasn't my house! It was dark. The owner wasn't home."

by Anonymousreply 22December 8, 2019 8:37 PM

I’m sorry you’re so upset, R20. I don’t know why you have to be so angry about this.

Personally, I would enjoy a DL in which everything wasn’t about my “husbear,” but since I can’t post ANYTHING with one someone asking if my “6’6” husband is pounding me” in this position or that one.

by Anonymousreply 23December 9, 2019 12:45 AM
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