Hiring an escort

Have only done this twice. Once was a horror show and once was one of the best experiences of my life. www.messge-forum.net is good site for advice on specific locations and men -- you can pursue their forums or ask questions yourself, including 1:1 conversation with guys who may have had experiences with a man you might want to hire. Do your due diligence, be forthright about what you want (and don't), and it could be a mind-blowing good experience.

Thank you. What was the horror show part?

It good idea.

Being an escort at over 30 is really sad.

I have. Six times over 18 months. Same guy. No issues.

I would really recommend doing your research. You can find reviews of escorts for most US cities on the web.

I think you're smart not to hire a porn star. Some people on DL have good experiences with them, but often they are not as dedicated or hardworking as guys who are not famous--porn stars know their familiarity will get them clients no matter what. Unfamous guys will want good online reviews.

It's expensive, so unless you're wealthy, i recommend doing it as a fairly rare treat. If you do it frequently, the cost will add up.

Here's what i would do: be very clear on what their rate is by the hour (or for 90 minute periods, if they prefer that way) upfront, and absolutely don't hire for the whole night the first time you do it. (It sounds romantic, but it's really wasted money--even a long 4 hour session is cheaper than overnight in most cases, and it's very rare for sex to go on that long with someone you've just met for the first time anyway.)

Ask exactly what he will do, and have him to commit to that. If you leave things unsaid you will not get what you left unsaid without paying more $$$.

Pay him upfront for the full session, but do so not by handing him money directly, but by saying "Oh, I left $200 (or $400, or whatever) on the night table." at the beginning of the session. Also agree as to when exactly he starts on the clock, and make a note of the time. Provide water for him, and also lube (and I would also say a condom, but in the days of PReP not everyone cares about that--I still do).

[quote] Being an escort at over 30 is really sad.

Not if you prefer daddies.

Go to one of the review sites and see how your potential escort is reviewed.

Otherwise, caveat emptor - they'll say anything to get your money. There are plenty of all different looks, ages, body types, and limitations to suit the tastes and preferences of most people.

The best line I've ever heard with regard to hiring escorts: "I don't pay them to have sex with me. I pay them to leave when I'm done."

R1, that link doesn’t work for some reason.

It's missing an a.

I can't find any reviews on my prospective... save on the site he posts on and those are favourable without sounding too good to be true.

Have slept with a few escorts, both male and female. Had perfectly enjoyable experiences.

Go for it -It's something everyone should try if they're interested. Looking at online reviews/comments is wise, as is the advice of being clear at the beginning about what you want and what you expect. Here are a few more tips:

1. Be respectful at all times. Just like you, he may have rules or limits -Talk about them up front, and follow them. If you both feel safe, you'll both relax and have fun.

2. If you're satisfied afterward, give him a tip. Not only is it customary, it can result in him choosing a return visit to you over another client.

3. It's not a date. Even if you go for the "boyfriend experience" do not expect anything beyond the time you have paid for. Being with a fantasy man can set your heart aflutter, but for him it is strictly business.

4. Shower first. Or shower together. He will very much appreciate you being clean and fresh!

5. If he comes to your place, offer him a bottle of water or a soft drink. Let him open it himself. Avoid alcohol and other drugs, as they will inhibit performance and potentially bring about unwanted complications.

6. If you met him via a website, be sure to leave a review of your experience. A positive review will help him financially, as well as helping other guys choose a good escort.

Escorts provides a service for their clients. If both parties agree to the terms and treat each other with respect, there should be no embarrassment, shame, guilt, or recrimination. It can be a chance to try something new, fulfill a fantasy, or simply enjoy physical beauty that you might not otherwise get to experience. Have fun!

My problem is I just can’t avoid worrying about the money and wondering if I could have gotten it cheaper. Like everything I buy. $200 is too much for 1/2 hour of fun.

Lots of good stuff here. I opted to hire a masseuse, who asked at the end if I wanted to fuck. We fucked right then and there, then the next day, two days after that, and remained in contact and have fucked 2-3x in later years - I only paid for the massage the first time and nothing after that. But much like the wise folks above said, be specific in what you want and expect. I hired a hot guy in Miami maybe 6 months ago and he was a cold, dead fish who just laid there and was a useless sack of shit. His apartment was pretty messy, and he didn't communicate well, and all he offered me to clean up at the end was a wad of toilet paper. asshole. So, once burned, twice shy... glad I had the good experience up front.

Paying for sex? As a gay man living in a city filled with other gay men, all of us with basic biological needs... well, I'd never pay for it, at least not right now.

Here's the thing: you don't need to look like a porn star to get laid.

And a bigger lesson? You can have amazing, mind-blowing sex with other gay guys... who don't resemble porn stars.

This last point seems to have escaped a number of you.

Shame the OP, r15! Shame him well! Let him know how superior you consider yourself to him!

My most excellent escort experience was with a 40-something guy who is just a total stud top with an enormous cock, and a nice guy....That's just what I wanted, and just what I got. Make sure you specify exactly what you want. You can often get a "feel" for whether the escort is going to be a reliable, nice guy and is going to live up to his profile. Use the message-forum.net forum to ask about other guys with similar experiences, look at rentmen to see if the reviews are consistent. It might be expensive, but if you're lucky, you get what you pay for.

I’m not into fucking , more into oral and body worship . Would that turn off a lot of escorts who just want to fuck?

Hored four times, three times very good, one was horrible. Those three times everything worked fine and I got what wanted. The more specific you are better service you get. You decide, tell what you want.

Are most of these hos drug addicts?

^^ Hired four times

Escorts would love you if you’re not into fucking. It’s like working a 1/2 day for them. So you should ask for a discount for BJ only.

I’ve had enough good experiences to keep doing it.

But beware: there’s a lot of catfishing, just like Grindr.

On a few occasions, the guy’s profile pics will not be his own. Many escorts who want to keep their identities private will post pics of a hot guy who sort of looks like them but is not them.

All 3 times this has happened to me, the guys were hot enough for me to stay. But if you don’t like the bait-and-switch, feel free to call the session off.

That’s why hiring a famous porn star is probably better — you’ll probably know what you’re getting into and the escort will have a much harder time not living up to a famous face.

Everybody who advertised as a famous porn star was the real deal for me.

[quote] I’m not into fucking , more into oral and body worship . Would that turn off a lot of escorts who just want to fuck?

if you go to rentmen dot com, most of the escorts there will post if they are into oral and body worship.

I tried this twice and it wasn’t for me. The 1st the guy arrived, I gave him oral, he fucked me for like two minutes, came and when I said, “What was that?” He said, “Oh, didn’t you cum...? I thought you came?” I was like, “You should go now. Quickly.” After he left I thought, “This is what women must feel like.”

The 2nd time was in Paris with some highly reviewed escort named Franco or something. He arrived about 20 min. late and would not stop talking about himself - he even told me about his boyfriend which was a real dick wilter. Then he went on about his photography - I literally paid him to leave having realised I wanted nothing to do with it.

R11 I think he wants sex, not sleeping.

Has anyone ever had paid sex with the Grindr prostitutes? They're the ones who claim to be 10 inches. They abound in New York.

10= 6 on grindr

I’ve never understood the need to hire an escort. Unless that’s your thing or you’re too old to catch a dick, don’t waste your money. No matter how ugly you are, or how fucked up you are, somebody will fuck you. Regardless of what you look like or how old you are, or how shitty your personality is, at least something about you is attractive to someone in your general area. As long as you aren’t picky and you aren’t an asshole, finding sex isn’t that hard.

R29 lol

I suppose 36 is actually 40?

[quote]As long as you aren’t picky

hahahahahahahahahahaha

[quote] Who has? Any regrets? Any successes?

Yes, a few regrets. Especially when the FBI got involved! But before that - it was a sweet ride. Having a male harem was fun!

[quote] No matter how ugly you are, or how fucked up you are, somebody will fuck you.

No, they won’t. With the advent of an endless supply of online porn, digital cam-boys & various robotic toys - many awkward people prefer to do that than to touch other awkward people.

It’s a myth that everybody will get continuous sex in their lives. Even in the rest of the animal kingdom, only certain individuals get to have sex - the rest will be sidelined and left without sex. In terms of group dynamics, that’s actually normal.

[quote] The 2nd time was in Paris with some highly reviewed escort named Franco or something. He arrived about 20 min late

That’s actually on-time by French standards. In Italy & Greece that would even be considered him arriving early!

High risk for STI, yeah?

Dammit, no one in Burlington.

[quote]Lots of good stuff here. I opted to hire a masseuse,

Masseuses are FEMALE, dear.

R38 Not in the American English version of that borrowed word.

Are top or bottom escorts in more demand?

[quote] I’ve never understood the need to hire an escort.

I used to think that until I met a friend who confessed he had escorted in his past (he's a successful lawyer now).

He said he was pretty amazed at the range of men who would hire him (My friend was an uber-cute bottom)--old, young, ugly, hot, rich, middle-class, etc.

It was a time before apps. So most of the men knew exactly the kind of guy they wanted and didn't want to look around and take the time to find someone to fit the description. His regulars knew exactly what he offerred and kept coming back--kind of like a good FB relationship

One should never hire an escort. That would be terribly crass. However an especially entertaining gentleman caller might be discretely offered some small gratuity at his departure.

I love a good rub and tug session from a sexy masseur

[quote] [R38] Not in the American English version of that borrowed word.

No.

[quote] —It's also why we pronounce Voilà as Wallah

No, "we" don't.

You're justifying your own idiocy completely unconvincingly. Please stop. It's painful.

It's considered rude to try to bargain on their rate. You don't get a discount just because you want oral and not fucking. Although if you were hiring for multiple hours, a discount can enter into discussion.

Depending on how specific your fantasy is, you might need to pay. there's nothign wrong with that

when they present hole you know it is a sign

Why would r29 settle his entire life for the uggos willing to have sex for free on Grindr?

Unless you're a 10 yourself, you'll never get a 10.

Just like wanting fine dining at a restaurant once in a while, I want to nail a 10 once in a while. Because I'm not a 10 and neither is the vast majority of people!

[quote] Are top or bottom escorts in more demand?

Guess.

The idea of being rude to negotiate is odd to me. It’s your time - everything is negotiable. If I want 15 minutes of oral, you should be happy to get $100 and have an hour to make another $200. Hookers are hustlers - like we all are as “freelancers” in today’s economy - whether it’s Taskrabbit or Rentmen. Maybe I’m stuck in the days of negotiated hustlers at Stellas but the idea of fixed prices for hookers is questionable.

Whore.

It's not customary to negotiate, and some escorts might become offended. But negotiate away if you're prepared for them to become angry or insulted.

It is true as r49 says that everything is negotiable, at least for someone. But remember that not everything is negotiable for everyone.

I am never so enchanted with a specific escort that I’d be distraught if he said no. Move on to the next one. Or take a visit to Cuba for some dirt cheap meat.

Did it once. Went to his place. He lived in squalor. He was high out of his mind. Like eyes bugging out and stammering. I was about 20 and he was in his 40s. I paid him out of fear and left.

[quote] I was about 20 and he was in his 40s.

And you paid [italic]him[/italic]? That's not how it's supposed to work...

Work it any way that you can

No, it's heresy! 20-y.o.s should get complimentary sex from 40-y.o.s. Anything else is a rip-off.

When I was 17 I drove around the gayborhood and saw a guy cruising me form the corner. Probably 22-23. Picked him up. He said to drive to an empty lot he knew. Had oral sex. Then he asked for money. I literally had $1.50. (Before ATM cards). He flew into a rage. I was lucky he didn’t hurt me. I had no idea he was a hooker.

Never have, probably never will, but I'd love to read more experiences.

Guys from out of town will have a hotel room and may be willing to see you there. I prefer that because I don’t have to worry about valuables being taken from my home. Also, I live in a condo with abutting neighbors. If he created a scene, I’d be embarrassed in front of them.

r37 which Burlington, studface?

I don't see anything wrong with it at all. I have sex regularly but if that ever changed or I wanted something specific then why not? You're paying for a service like anything else.

Go for it, if you don't enjoy it then don't do it again.

I don’t feel sorry for old gays that can afford to hire an escort or be generous I feel Sorry for the old gays that get SOO offended when a younger guys asks them if they are generous because they can not afford it!

Last escort I hired ended up paying me cause I'm so hot.

I've hired a few off and on for the past six years, both in the U.S. and overseas. Haven't done it for the last couple of years. Maybe eight different guys? A site called Daddy's Reviews helped a little, but reading thoroughly through the profiles helps. Maybe I've been lucky, I've only had a couple of guys that were just okay and the rest either met or exceeded my expectations. The best was a guy from Spain who I hooked up with in Berlin of all places. I asked him over two nights in a row. Once wasn't enough. Hot, hot, hot ...